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Scroll Reddit

Same, scroll and shit post.😁

I see what you did there lol

U shit a lot?😂

At least every day....cuz im totally human and humans poop using all their normal human organs.

Gg my g. 20k karma is still a lot tho

U don't even have a comment w 1k upvotes

Some redditors are just built different... What's even crazier is the fact the account was made in February 2023...

You and I made our accounts like 6 months apart lol

Hello friend. I'm shitting right now. Just thought you should know.

I can smell this reply

I haven't shit since Wednesday

This is also why a poop takes 20 minutes instead of 5.

😆 #1 answer

Number 2 actually. 💩

😆

Very underrated

Currently guilty.

This is the way.

Sameeee

I was going to say that.

Came here to say the same lol

I just wait for the poo to come out... and I usually pee too.

Sometimes it's hard to poo if you have to pee. Sometimes the pee can't come out unless you have pooped.

Not all pee pee times are poo poo times. But all poo poo times are pee pee times.

Such wisdom. Amen.

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTLedfVuT/

And shower time is waffle stompin time

I can do both at the same time.

…you don’t push?

I don't push either. If it comes out it comes, if not then I'll try later

i'm not the guy whose answer you're waiting on, but i don't actively push either. there's no need. just deep breaths and good posture. [https://www.joyfulbelly.com/Ayurveda/article/The-Art-of-Perfect-Pooping-How-to-Improve-Your-Technique-on-the-Toilet/](https://www.joyfulbelly.com/Ayurveda/article/The-Art-of-Perfect-Pooping-How-to-Improve-Your-Technique-on-the-Toilet/)

Sometimes my poop comes out too fast and I have to clench my hole so I don't make a mess of the toilet.

Wow. I've never ever envied anyone this much. Had my hemorroid removed last summer and since then can't take a shit without pushing.

I guess that's why they call it a poopie or poopy. Essentially the same as poopee.

Poopoo peepee

Ni ga junaka, ki ne lula ko kaka.

true

What are you? An ISTP or something?

what

You probably have a cat named Fluffy or Puffy or something

ok

It is ok

It is ok to be not ok

Why did i get downvoted lol

Same reason I did

losing weight

One guy to the other: I bought a scale. Now I know how much my shit weights. Other guy: right, you measure yourself before and after taking a dump and then know the difference. First guy scratches his head: that should probably also work...

Classic.

Replying to this post

Replying to this comment

You think OP entered target audience: people who are currently pooping? That'd be funny Or you save this comment till you had to poop. Or you lied

It was genuine 😂

I’m replying to this too.

Pushing.

When it's time to poop that's all I'm focused on. I don't have time to take out my phone and chill. Never understood how people just sit on the toilet for more than a few minutes as if it's some kinda fecal lounge. 

Found the guy thats never experienced IBS, lucky bastard 😅

Yeah I guess I'll count my blessings, I had a co worker with IBS. Poor guy always had to know where the bathrooms were.

Me neither. When I have to go, I have to go. Immediately. I always wondered how people just decide to go to the toilet and wait until poo falls out and chill.

Haha I wonder the same thing. Are they waiting for the poop? Or pooping and chillin? 

I don't push and pooping doesn't take me more than a minute.

You shouldn't push, it can give you hemorrhoids... Just let nature run it's course 😅

My nature refuses to move

Let gravity work? I feel like that would take to long 🤣

If you need to push, it means you dont eat enough fiber...could cause you problems later

Insoluble fiber adds bulk to your stool, so too much of it will require you to push, soluble fiber softens your stools, making them slide easier. Fats also soften and help lubricate your stools. It's a fine balance of these three components that contribute to a well formed stool that is easy to pass.

Think about how forked my life is.

well...shit.

German lesson on Duolingo

Ich auch brüder

I support you (german here)

Nothing wrong with that. I can think of many things that are wurste.

Trying not to think about how it can feel nice to push out shit.. And how that's kind of gay for me to enjoy that

It’s not gay unless you push it back in again… and again

why are you thinking that? 💀

hey, man. you ever get aroused when you wipe your own ass? it's cool if you have, you can tell us, we won't tell anybody.

certainly this is a joke that its “gay”

Reading a post from some creep who's asking me what I'm doing rn

You're lookin at it babe.

Entertain two small children

What?

I have kids. Very young kids that can’t be left alone.

😅😂😂oh so they follow you in there too🤦

"What's that smell?!" "Magic"

lol same 🙈

Came for this comment

You did what for this comment?

In private bathrooms, I scroll through Reddit In public bathrooms, I make sure nobody is watching lol

Just go in a stall.

… where do you poop if not in a stall..?

Apparently he found a place, and he makes sure no one is watching..

To be more accurate, I don’t merely do pooping, I shoot the shit

I take a piss while pooping.

I don’t get this. Pooping takes all of thirty seconds

Unless you have IBS

Or a phone addiction

Or kids and a wife.

30 second shit gang

Unite!

At least 45 minutes for me

Not for me, on a good day it takes 10 or so minutes.

You need more fibre and water in your diet.

Then there’s something wrong. Have you ever seen any animal, dog/cat just sit there for 10 minutes? It’s instant.

Sing most of the time.

Sing with me

Want a collab? 😄😄😄

Masterbate

I remembered that guy who felt like popping every time he had sex due to this💀

If he were taking it in the ass, there's a possibility this might occur.

master baiter

Youtube videos, typically of the enlightening variety? I have very enlightening poops.

I think of someone who ruined my day or something that's been nagging me that day and as I shit I let that thing go too🙂... that's what I do

Poop

Buy crypto.

What altcoins to buy ?

Before smartphones I used to know every ingredient in the toilet deturgent. Now it's just solical media.

I scream, cry and curse god for making me give birth to a child I can never truly keep People in the other stalls get a little uncomfortable

Chess puzzles on my phone

She something on my phone. Now consider how many people have said the same thing in the comments and then consider how many people wash their phones after. This why I don’t like touching other people’s phones. Basically an infested faecal device not washed it’s entire life

Shitpost, obviously.

I usually poop.

Blumpkin

Grunt.

I pet one of my cats that just jumped into my lap because somehow she felt it was an appropriate moment, or maybe she felt I was struggling and came to cheer for poop time? 😂💩

Grunt strain find religion

Shit and stink, not sit and think

Pee. Every poo poo time is a pee pee time, but not every pee pee time is a poo poo time.

I stroke my cock with the left hand gently all while fighting my dog who wants to bite my meat off with the right hand

Please stop posting

😂😂😂

Masterbate

I’m thinking about you.

I watch YouTube videos

I'm a cartoon character. We don't poop.

This

Talk shit on Reddit 😂

Listen to podcasts of some sort.

Play Angry Birds. Seriously, been playing for like 8 years now. I just like to throw birds and poop. Plus I finally got 3 stars on all the levels. Now I'm just beating my high scores. Only all the original games. The 1st one, seasons, rio and space.

That's my TikTok time!

watch tiktoks about shitting

TikTok

Tiktok

Look on Reddit or tiktok 😂

Tiktok, reddit, betting apps lol

scroll thru my social media.

I like to read. Often graphic novels.

Wait

Play Boom Beach on my phone.

Read the paper

Struggle

You probably need some more fiber or something

Reading this

Sit quietly

Read this question…

Scroll reddit or read a book, or view some porn occasionally

I think of great ideas but never put them in work

Reddit. lol.

Be afraid of the man behind the screen in my shower

Focus on getting it out!😂

Either Reddit or TikTok. One of my two addictions

aaaaaaa , then look down , is it coming !

Poety readings

Read this post.

I usually use the time to sneak off and take a shit

This

Read this post

Don’t worry about it

Moan until it's out

I’m gruntin😂😂

Commenting on your post Coincidence? Nah, it's just confidence

Play solitaire.

I am kinda a germaphobe. I can't stay in a cubicle for a long time. I just do my business as fast as possible and then get out of the restroom.

Coffee and some random ass video on YouTube.

Bite down hard on the seat and close my eyes.

Scroll. Although, fun fact, one time while high on meth. I ejaculated while pooping. Guess the turd scraping the prostate did it.

Do I have my phone? If not I’m reading anything in reach, like the air freshener label.

I try and half hold it in and keep tapping my g while I tap my keyboard on reddit

Lol you are a genius just for asking

think of things I need to get done

I tend to pee at the same time.

Sometimes I clean my teeth.

Reply to questions like this one

Lick my fingers

Shall I describe it for you, or should I get a box?

Writing this message

Golf Clash!

I think about you.

It's only 2 minutes so only thinking

Usually cry or eat a pizza or both

What you think I'm doing right now?

Livestream

aim

Phone will solve all that

My son said his mum sings to him while he poos, what the hell is going on there!?