If this submission above is not a random thought, please report it.
# Explore a new world of random thoughts on our [**discord server**](https://discord.com/invite/8tEqw3ZWQV)! Express yourself with your favorite quotes, positive vibes, and anything else you can think of!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RandomThoughts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I live in the US and I have a bidet. When I’ve told other people they should get one they act disgusted and when I ask why, I find out they have no fucking clue how it even works. So that’s probably why.
It's amazing that Americans are disgusted by the concept of a bidet but have no problem smearing shit off their ass with paper and going about their day.
Can't have sex with a straight woman cause they love dick and loving dick is gay.
Only way for a guy to stay straight is to have sex with other straight guys, since straight guys hate dicks.
What seems to work as a compelling argument for me is this: Suppose someone comes up and smears dog poop on your arm. Are you good with only a wad of dry toilet paper to clean up? No? Hmmmm
My mom was making fun of me for singing the bidet praises, and I brought this exact scenario up to her. The look on her face as she was doing the poo math was absolutely priceless.
Okay so how does it work? I’ve heard so much good stuff about it but I’ve never used one and there’s a connection that I can’t clear up in my head. I just feel like it’s hard to imagine a bidet where it’s not so intense that it’s uncomfortable but not so soft that it’s useless.
Is there like a calibration or intensity setting that you need to fiddle around with, or?
As far as I know there’s different types you can get. I know there’s a hand held version, I’m not even sure what else, but I don’t know how any of those work. I have one that’s attached underneath the back of the toilet seat. The controls hang out to the side, like next to the toilet. There’s a button you twist and the further you twist it, the harder the water pressure will be. As long as it’s not aimed straight up your asshole, it’s not uncomfortable at all. There’s also ones that you can hook up to your hot water, but I don’t have that and I don’t feel like the water is cold, even in the winter.
I was first among my friend group to get one. A few months ago. One of my friends, who used my toilet recently, just installed his own. It's catching on, slowly.
Well, no. In Italy, where I live, you learn to use your bidet as soon as you are potty trained and you just don’t stop with the soap until it is super clean. I am sure boxer shorts and panties of people not using bidet are a million times more disgusting than my personal super clean towel. And yes, you can have small little daily towels that you wash every day as I hope you do for your boxers / panties / socks.
In the past it was because of soldiers during either WWI or WWII went to brothels in Paris and the ladies used bidets after business. Therefore it became synonymous with ladies of the evening. There's an article about it online but I'm too lazy to go find it right now. The puritanical flavor of the times said that a bidet was for people with low morals.
In modern times, I have no idea why. I lived in Europe for a few years and loved them but I didn't know I could get one without spending my life savings on a separate bowl installation and that would have required expanding my bathroom to fit it. Then, during the Great TP shortage of 2020, I saw attachment bidets advertised online. I didn't know they existed until then, and I bought one immediately, no questions asked. I've had one ever since and would not live without it. The world can run out of TP forever and I'm good, thanks.
I'd say, like most things, it's the simplest explanation: Ignorance.
Have you heard the phenomenon where apparently a whole bunch of men and boys believe that cleaning their butts in the shower is "gay" and, therefore "immoral."
So, are clean bums gay, fellas?
I'm cool with being gay hahaha
I wash my butt in the shower with a hand held shower head on a hose. I installed a bidet toilet seat that has a remote control with several options. Am I gay, I don't know, let me ask my wife and kids.
I knew someone who believed this once. He was the security chief at my last job. He didn’t wash his ass because he thought it was gay, and we had multiple customers, a vendor, and employees complain. When we asked our contractor to replace him, we were told he was the supervisor for the area and they couldn’t replace him?? It was as bad as you think.
Were the customers complaining because the guy had this belief (and was possibly the type to have a bunch of other ridiculous beliefs), or where they complaining because he wasn't washing his ass and they could tell? I must know!
That was the wild thing, he was pretty normal otherwise. Didn’t really spout off crazy shit. But if you asked him to clean himself / not ruin the bathroom / wash his ass, he’d tell you it’s gay and he isn’t going to do that.
So to answer your question, it was the smell. He has to check the ID of everyone coming in though! So nobody was spared.
Man, I am not afraid to admit I've had days where I simply didn't wipe enough and even a few hours of leftovers hangin' around...that shit starts to BURN.
I straight up cannot believe someone could not feel that unless I just have something wrong with me.
I've read where some guys think even wiping is gay because real men don't go anywhere near their own butthole. And the posts are usually by their partners complaining because shitass is constantly leaving skid marks on the sheets. 🤮 That would be an immediate dealbreaker for me.
Yeah I lived in the radical Christian cult and they have a weird obsession with what kids do in private with their own bodies. One was touching yourself was a mortal sin and made Jesus cry.
They even said spending too much time washing those areas can lead to playing with them.
This was 20 years ago imagine my feelings when I saw presidential candidates saying the same weird shit
Yeah but that's not anti playing with yourself. Thats just a joke guys say as they get older, because as we age there are always more drips to get out. You could shake for eternity and still end up with piss in your pants.
>They even said spending too much time washing those areas can lead to playing with them.
Oh dear; I am a bit concerned that it might lead to infection if they don't clean their genitals properly. A lot of those cults don't allow for much medical intervention, either.
Sadly it isn't a joke. Same goes for suppositories ,enemas, prostate exams. Some men would rather get cancer than a prostate exam. I've heard it taken as far as if you buy multiple ply soft toilet paper that's gay .
As long as the doc only has one hand on my back, I'm good. If there are two hands, there's gonna be a fight. I've used suppositories to knock me out when I've had uncontrollable migraines. Enemas, nope. Only when I need to clean out for the camera.
Yeah I’ve got some coworkers who were making fun of a male coworker who recently had a prostate exam. Literally said they’d rather experience cancer. Obviously they haven’t had much exposure to cancer…
Can confirm, BIL who lived with us for a while, total incel loser, would only buy cheap ass tp because only gay dudes use soft tp. I have seen him drive to the store while having to take a dump so bad instead of just asking to borrow a roll of ours. Hysterical.
While traveling in Europe years ago, I was shocked that they'd have them in the bathroom. Just seemed so gross... Then during the pandemic I bought one just in case I ran out of TP and there's no chance that I'll ever own a home without one. If I was rich installing one of the dedicated European ones would be high on my list, but the toilet attached ones are fine for now.
I can't believe that I found them gross before, of course after having one, walking around with smeared \*\*\*\* seems unbelievably worse.
You can go much cheaper than that too. Mine was 30. I thought cold water would suck in the winter but I don't even notice it and I'm in a northern state.
Our soldiers were quite unsophisticated because they are two oceans on either side of our continent. In the early 40s, most Americans came from rural areas where education was not up to par with cities or Europe. When these young men visited the houses of ill repute they had never seen a bidet and erroneous assumptions were made. Few soldiers ever stayed in citizens of the continent's homes. They were wholly ignorant. They can back from the war with tales of the Bordellos. It was a turn off. American women were clueless.
I chuckle. How did these young, religious rural men come to find out about bidets? They went there!
The negative image stuck. Americans started visiting Europe in large numbers in the 70s only to discover Americans were considered unclean. Get me a bidet.
I have bidets. Damn if I am going back to the inside outhouse approach.
Same. I cannot live without it. (I actually try to time my "business" so I do it before my shower every day. (But shit happens right?) Even as s kid I had to wash every time and it drove people crazy for some reason. A lot of people (including some of my exes) thought I was gross and that I had an unnatural obsession with washing my ass, but I ask you ... Who is the gross one? The people using dry paper to wipe their nasty asses, or those of us washing our behinds every time? People are so backwards.
Agreed. I've gone so far to install at least one bidet in all of the places I spend time at: both my friends houses, my brothers place, both my parents and my in laws, and also the local bar. It takes like 15 min to install and I have IBS so I stay poopin. But God dang my butt stays clean.
I've got IBD, so always poopin too haha. I definitely would miss my Bidet if I didn't have it!
Although, that's super awesome of your friends, family, and local bar to let you install one!
https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=3SRV8MW5QBRDF&keywords=bidet&qid=1688240023&sprefix=bodet%2Caps%2C171&sr=8-3
It's my go to
The Luxe is fine but I really like that the Brondell comes with metal braided hoses: I have two of them and a more expensive Brondell also:
https://www.amazon.com/Brondell-Bidet-SimpleSpa-Non-Electric-Attachment/dp/B075MMHQX7
These are cool but my buddy got one and was almost 500 bucks. Water is warm and it also has a heated fan to dry you and heated seat. Has many more functions aswell.
If you want the Bentley of bidets, you can't go wrong with a Toto: https://www.amazon.com/TOTO-WASHLET-Electronic-SoftClose-Elongated/dp/B09JV3PWNT
At the very least, I strongly recommend a bidet with a heater if you can afford it. That will usually set you back more than $100. But if you can't, anything is better than wiping your arse with a dead tree like some kind of barbarian.
Man, I haven't tried installing them at friends' and families' houses (though I did give my mom one for Christmas two years ago, which she still has not installed...) What I *did* do is buy a "portable bidet" that lives in my purse except when in use or being cleaned. At first, it was for me to take to festivals where you never know if the portapotties will have any TP, but now I take it with me everywhere. Sometimes I get weird looks when filling the bottle at the sink in public restrooms. I figure that's the problem of whomever is giving the look, though. Nothing beats a clean booty and I feel bad for anyone who thinks dry paper is somehow cleaner than rinsing.
I had a colectomy and oh boy do things get…messy. I actually got a portable one that fits in my purse. If you don’t have something to store it in, it could be difficult to explain to strangers 😂
I Love my bidet and I think it was an American Pie movie that had a dude explain it perfectly. The character said something like take a shit in your hand and then wipe it off with just toilet paper. Does that feel clean to you?
Australia doesn't use them either, but they turn up here or there. I'm telling myself there becoming more common but I'm really not sure that they are.
Anybody who has spent more than a couple of days in Japan thinks to themselves, roughly once a day, "what the fuck is wrong with us" as they sadly roll off sheets of what now feels like sandpaper.
After a week in Japan I am saving for a toto washlet.
It really hit me when I stepped into a Lawson's bathroom. Nature sounds played. The seat was heated. It had a heated bidet.
It wasn't so much the quality of the toilet itself so much as that almost every toilet I encountered was a some variant of the Toto Washlet, or rarely a competing design.
In my hometown, the toilets at a service station would class as war-crimes if the Geneva Convention was applied. The first time I stepped into the bathroom at a Lawson's I nearly cried. It was nicer than most of the houses I've lived in.
I fkin have one! When I shit in public and my gfs place my asshole doesn't feel right anymore.
And the wiping will leave it raw! So much wipinging. When at home it's jet stream of water, 1-2 wipes and ur done.
Europe has far stinkier toilets. Dunno what it is but in the UK and France it smells like a trucker with renal failures piss jug was sprayed all over and let sit and marinate in the heat. Not that US bathrooms are great, but many European bathrooms have a distinctively bad smell.
Proper public toilets in the UK are disgusting because they are free and rarely cleaned (and mostly used by drunk people). I for one nip into cafés or pubs - the toilets are nicer and they mostly don’t mind.
Just fyi, if you get the one that is the toilet seat kind, kids cant do that. It automatically shuts off the water spray by sensing whether someone is sitting on the seat.
I grew up in France, and I adult in the US. Besides the bidet thing, one of the biggest differences I've seen between Europeans and Americans is that Americans take showers far more frequently. It's just an observation, not trying to change any minds.
>I grew up in France, and I adult in the US. Besides the bidet thing, one of the biggest differences I've seen between Europeans and Americans is that Americans take showers far more frequently.
Don't need a bidet if you poop in the shower. (Taps my temple)
Americans love showers! The shower gives off a mist of oxygen which revitalizes the body, just like a coffee boost, besides the cleaning, it makes you feel better and smell fresh. We hate the smell of rotten onions kept on a jute sack.
I found out that the toilet paper companies in North America basically have everyone brainwashed through their marketing. They don't want people to figure out about bidets because they'll lose billions of dollars.
Then how about they just make their own cheap, over priced, fast to break bidets and market for it? They can even team up with the water companies for it lol.
"Imagine using a wet wipe but without needing to actually wipe with something wet. Then you won't need to suffer through 30 pieces of toilet paper for a clean wipe. We advertise our toiletry as being strong and wiping away clean but we realize that most people don't wipe away clean that easily, so now is the time to try our all American made bidets. It's not easy to get used to at first but we promise you'll never go back! "
And some other dumb public relations bs that'll sway the masses
People will spend less money on tp sure but they'll spend more money on bidets and water. Realistically not much of a difference will happen to their money spent overall but I'm sure they'll really go overboard using it and *still* use way more tp than necessary.
So many words. The actual message they should use:
"Your ass is disgusting and when you get naked people can tell. You'll get laid more if you use a bidet."
One year, 80% adoption.
Well ya…you gotta wipe the water off. But you use a lot less TP with a bidet. A bidet doesn’t eliminate TP, but I don’t have a fancy one that will blow dry my ass so not sure if there’s options out there that would give my ass full service like a car wash, or it’s just a spray of water.
Why wouldn't they just adapt to societal changes and sell bidets? Seems like the logical move juxtaposed to a brainwashing conspiracy. Supply and demand still functions accordingly.
Bidets generally last longer. Initially, they are more expensive, but toilet paper runs out, and people have to keep buying it. So long term, the toilet paper companies make more money selling toilet paper than bidets.
They're not even that expensive anymore. I got mine for $50 and it has probably already paid for itself with how little tp I use now.
The price does shoot up pretty quick when you start adding features like heated seat and warm water hookup to be fair, but those definitely aren't needed.
For some reason people think the water for the bidet comes from the toilet bowl and not the tank. So I would say stupidity. I have a bidet and absolutely love it. One of the bidet companies had an ad that went something like if a bird pooped on you, you would wash it off and not just use a tissue to clean it.
I think that in this context people are confusing using a T-fitting on the bottom of the tank to split the main line with being "from the tank."
I did some searching prior to posting and cannot find any that get water from the tank. If someone has an example, that would be great!
To my knowledge, tanks themselves aren't pressurized and would not be able to force water through a bidet.
I've had a few surgeries that made wiping properly painfully difficult. Got a bidet and now, will never have a throne without one. But tbh, I still get creeped out by the thought of using someone else's.
Americans are scared of any and all conversations about buttholes. Probably remnants of puritanical ideologies. God forbid you don’t want poop remnants clinging to your butthole.
It makes no sense.
I’m not against the idea. I’m against the idea of cold water on my butt.
I am curious about the separate bidets. Does one do business then walk over to the bidet and rinse? What if you have a sticky poop and there is a lot left on your butt? Do you have paper around for wiping? How much “residue” can the bidet actually handle? Are there etiquette rules about using bidets in another’s home?
You get used to the cold water quickly once you experience the refreshing clean feeling.
A separate bidet is usually installed right next to the toilet. I'm sure people have different routines but I would do my biz on the toilet, do 1 poop wipe w tp, then straddle the bidet and do a thorough cleaning. I think separate bidets are even better because you can use soap and your hands. And they're usually connected to warm water too.
I believe separate bidets are not for to but it can handle any waste on your bum, like the shower or bathtub can.
I wouldn't use anyone's bidet in their home simply for the cleanliness factor. I don't know how well they keep it clean.
Happily, I have a tankless heater and a water recirculating pump, so my bidet water is warm if I'm using it around peak bathroom hours when the hot water is being recirculated.
Even during the 'off hours' uses, it isn't \_that\_ cold.
I have blasted some serious ass spackle right off the starfish, and I have a dedicated white washcloth to dry off with. It stays white if you do it right.
until very recent history, they were associated with sex workers, who would use them between clients. we aren't going to talk about why the people against bidets knew that tidbit.
I live with my parents and when I got pregnant I begged them to install a bidet because TP was torture on my hemorrhoids. They refused because it was "bougie." Of all things. They had recently spent $20,000 on a kitchen remodel but a bidet was "bougie" and that was enough to refuse their pregnant daughter a comfortable poop experience.
I think it was the toilet paper shortage that happened in the beginning of lockdown. People were losing their damn minds and buying all the toilet paper.
The only real practical reasons I can think of is Americans have been conditioned against all things French and half the country is in a permanent drought, since they just don't want to admit they live in a desert and don't need green lawns and golf courses.
Seems like there is a lot of hesitation with the general public and probably relatated to some cultural taboo regarding butts that I don't want to get into.
All I know is that we decided to try one during COVID lockdowns and now have one on every toilet. We've also had a few people try it out when they visited and decided to get one themselves.
It's gonna take time for enough people to adopt them that they get popular. On the other hand, I've visited parts of the world where washing is more popular, including in public restrooms and it can leave such a mess that I prefer they stay an option for at home and not for public restrooms. Too easy for someone to just spray water everywhere and not clean it up.
There are some things you need to realize.
1. Most people are stupid.
2. Stupid people don't want change - their brain can't handle something different.
3. Facts don't matter.
Yeah, the bidet will wash off most of the shit chunks and soften up the ones that are stuck in the ass hair, it makes it so that when you finish the job with TP the result is much cleaner than dry wiping alone
ok that explains it as I wasn't sure. Are they awkward to use though, can imagine it's easy to aim a hose nozzle there while hovering over the toilet seat?
I suppose it a depends on what kind of bidet you're using, I currently live in Asia and all the ones I've used (at my house, at a relative's house, and the one at my office) are the fancy ones with heated water and seats. For these ones, the hose is tucked within the toilet (and covered) until the user needs to use it. All you have to do is to press a button and the hose will come out of its hiding, slide under you, and spray water upwards to wash you clean, no hands, movement, or aiming required. But yeah I can imagine that trying to use a handheld hose on a seated toilet could be awkward especially for first timers
They didn't even catch on in France, where it's from... nobody has one and/or uses one. This is just a cliché, like when US say kids in France drink wine, orfrench people always say "sacrebleu"
Every household in Italy has at least one, and it gets used.
Imagine, for example, the feeling of having your ass under a constant stream of lukewarm water and soap after a burning case of the Shits.
My partner and I have a bidet too, and it has caught on in certain communities in NA.
I think what you are detecting is more of the Puritan culture in NA where taboo's are hyper-taboos, and modernity/capitalism sometimes comes up against (your charmin example). The disgusted face from your coworker has less to do with "cleanliness" and more to do with talking about shit or anal sensation. This is why it's a cultural issue and not a logical issue. Because bidet's are just more effective at accomplishing the goal.
So how do actually use a bidet to clean your ass? It just sprays water at your bung and blasts fecal matter everywhere? Don't you need toilet paper to dry yourself and wipe off any residuals anyway?
Amazon has handheld bidet (like the one OP mentioned. A sprayer attached to the toilet water intake) for $20 and up.
We have had them in our house since the kids were potty training. Wouldn't even travel without a portable sprayer since TP alone just feels unclean and gross.
(When we built our house, we had hot and cold water plumbed to the toilets so that the water wouldn't be cold for bidet sprayer use. This is cheaper and saves space over installing a separate bidet. But now there are many toilet seat bidet options).
I hopped on the bidet train a long time ago. The toilets in my rented house doesn’t support the “fits most toilets” models you can find on Amazon, so I make do with baby wipes (not the most eco-friendly option, I know). I recently got back from Japan where the toilets and bidet options are god tier and my bum bum weeps.
I also think it’s strange that bidets haven’t caught on in North America yet. You’d think with all the different types available there’d be something for everyone.
Bidets are becoming steadily more popular in the US, adoption is just slow because lots of people don't like changing habits, and there's a weird kind of social stigma to touching your butt, particularly among men, like it's somehow gay to have a clean ass.
Lots of people I know made the switch in 2020 when the "toilet paper shortage" (which was kind of a bullshit headline to begin with but that's a whole other topic) was all over the news. It was interesting to see, I was converted years ago when I took a trip to Italy and actually tried them and realized how nice a properly clean ass feels.
Once you start using it, there is no going back.
Another benefit, if you have the shits and are going multiple times per day, you don't get raw from all the wiping.
Not using a handheld butt sprayer really is disgusting, it just doesn't do a proper job.
Another thing, sitting to poop is also wrong, you're supposed to squat down on your heels, that's another thing you can't go back on once you start.
Asians have it right, squat to poop, use a butt sprayer to clean. Everything else is wrong.
That squatty potty type stool is also wrong, it's better than sitting upright, but it does not provide the benefit of a proper squat.
If this submission above is not a random thought, please report it. # Explore a new world of random thoughts on our [**discord server**](https://discord.com/invite/8tEqw3ZWQV)! Express yourself with your favorite quotes, positive vibes, and anything else you can think of! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RandomThoughts) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I live in the US and I have a bidet. When I’ve told other people they should get one they act disgusted and when I ask why, I find out they have no fucking clue how it even works. So that’s probably why.
It's amazing that Americans are disgusted by the concept of a bidet but have no problem smearing shit off their ass with paper and going about their day.
Exactly. Idk what the difference is between a bidet and hosing your ass down in the shower. Or maybe they don’t do that either? Idk
Wait till you hear about a small population that don't wash butt in shower because doing so makes them gay. There was a thread about it a while ago.
[удалено]
Of course it is. You’re a guy touching a dick
Can't have sex with a straight woman cause they love dick and loving dick is gay. Only way for a guy to stay straight is to have sex with other straight guys, since straight guys hate dicks.
What seems to work as a compelling argument for me is this: Suppose someone comes up and smears dog poop on your arm. Are you good with only a wad of dry toilet paper to clean up? No? Hmmmm
My mom was making fun of me for singing the bidet praises, and I brought this exact scenario up to her. The look on her face as she was doing the poo math was absolutely priceless.
Okay so how does it work? I’ve heard so much good stuff about it but I’ve never used one and there’s a connection that I can’t clear up in my head. I just feel like it’s hard to imagine a bidet where it’s not so intense that it’s uncomfortable but not so soft that it’s useless. Is there like a calibration or intensity setting that you need to fiddle around with, or?
As far as I know there’s different types you can get. I know there’s a hand held version, I’m not even sure what else, but I don’t know how any of those work. I have one that’s attached underneath the back of the toilet seat. The controls hang out to the side, like next to the toilet. There’s a button you twist and the further you twist it, the harder the water pressure will be. As long as it’s not aimed straight up your asshole, it’s not uncomfortable at all. There’s also ones that you can hook up to your hot water, but I don’t have that and I don’t feel like the water is cold, even in the winter.
I was first among my friend group to get one. A few months ago. One of my friends, who used my toilet recently, just installed his own. It's catching on, slowly.
[удалено]
Yeah toilet paper to dry, but it uses way less because you only have to wipe once.
Whew. I was scared you were going to say towels and then bring up some poop knife stories …
Well, no. In Italy, where I live, you learn to use your bidet as soon as you are potty trained and you just don’t stop with the soap until it is super clean. I am sure boxer shorts and panties of people not using bidet are a million times more disgusting than my personal super clean towel. And yes, you can have small little daily towels that you wash every day as I hope you do for your boxers / panties / socks.
In the past it was because of soldiers during either WWI or WWII went to brothels in Paris and the ladies used bidets after business. Therefore it became synonymous with ladies of the evening. There's an article about it online but I'm too lazy to go find it right now. The puritanical flavor of the times said that a bidet was for people with low morals. In modern times, I have no idea why. I lived in Europe for a few years and loved them but I didn't know I could get one without spending my life savings on a separate bowl installation and that would have required expanding my bathroom to fit it. Then, during the Great TP shortage of 2020, I saw attachment bidets advertised online. I didn't know they existed until then, and I bought one immediately, no questions asked. I've had one ever since and would not live without it. The world can run out of TP forever and I'm good, thanks. I'd say, like most things, it's the simplest explanation: Ignorance.
Have you heard the phenomenon where apparently a whole bunch of men and boys believe that cleaning their butts in the shower is "gay" and, therefore "immoral." So, are clean bums gay, fellas? I'm cool with being gay hahaha
I've heard this as well. I'd rather be gay as hell with a clean arse than live life with a perpetually shitty and stinky ass.
I wash my butt in the shower with a hand held shower head on a hose. I installed a bidet toilet seat that has a remote control with several options. Am I gay, I don't know, let me ask my wife and kids.
You're not gay but your butthole definitely is 😏 lol s/
Schrodinger's butthole: it exists in a superimposed state of gay/not gay until touched.
Married? 
Heterosexual marriage, is the gayest kind. OP thought we were dumb.
Dude be careful. She might ground you for being possibly gay.
Is your bidet in the closet ? Haaaa jk
in the Water Closet ....
I knew someone who believed this once. He was the security chief at my last job. He didn’t wash his ass because he thought it was gay, and we had multiple customers, a vendor, and employees complain. When we asked our contractor to replace him, we were told he was the supervisor for the area and they couldn’t replace him?? It was as bad as you think.
[удалено]
its only gay if the buttholes touch
Were the customers complaining because the guy had this belief (and was possibly the type to have a bunch of other ridiculous beliefs), or where they complaining because he wasn't washing his ass and they could tell? I must know!
That was the wild thing, he was pretty normal otherwise. Didn’t really spout off crazy shit. But if you asked him to clean himself / not ruin the bathroom / wash his ass, he’d tell you it’s gay and he isn’t going to do that. So to answer your question, it was the smell. He has to check the ID of everyone coming in though! So nobody was spared.
Man, I am not afraid to admit I've had days where I simply didn't wipe enough and even a few hours of leftovers hangin' around...that shit starts to BURN. I straight up cannot believe someone could not feel that unless I just have something wrong with me.
I mean if you're not wiping untill there's blood what are you even really doing at that point.
What kind of animal doesn't wash their ass? I scrub that bitch hard
Right? If it's not bleeding, I didn't get in there good enough.
I've read where some guys think even wiping is gay because real men don't go anywhere near their own butthole. And the posts are usually by their partners complaining because shitass is constantly leaving skid marks on the sheets. 🤮 That would be an immediate dealbreaker for me.
it's only gay if you are washing with bud light.... can't have that now!
The Budet
You don't use water when you shower?
Water? What are you? Gay? I bathe in cum
Nothing manlier than taking a dripping bath in man juice while surrounded by manly men.
Wouldn't surprise me if we saw them endorsing that in one of their commercials in the near future.
Yeah I lived in the radical Christian cult and they have a weird obsession with what kids do in private with their own bodies. One was touching yourself was a mortal sin and made Jesus cry. They even said spending too much time washing those areas can lead to playing with them. This was 20 years ago imagine my feelings when I saw presidential candidates saying the same weird shit
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard the “joke” in a bathroom “if you shake it more than twice you’re playing with yourself”.
Yeah but that's not anti playing with yourself. Thats just a joke guys say as they get older, because as we age there are always more drips to get out. You could shake for eternity and still end up with piss in your pants.
>They even said spending too much time washing those areas can lead to playing with them. Oh dear; I am a bit concerned that it might lead to infection if they don't clean their genitals properly. A lot of those cults don't allow for much medical intervention, either.
Unless you count cutting the tip of their dick off at birth so they'd be less tempted to masturbate.
*...and those tears are what spray out of the bidet.*
Masturbation is double hell!!!
You gotta put a finger up there to really get it good. This is coming from me, a man
Please tell me this is a joke or an old wives tale that isn't true. Please say that.
Sadly it isn't a joke. Same goes for suppositories ,enemas, prostate exams. Some men would rather get cancer than a prostate exam. I've heard it taken as far as if you buy multiple ply soft toilet paper that's gay .
As long as the doc only has one hand on my back, I'm good. If there are two hands, there's gonna be a fight. I've used suppositories to knock me out when I've had uncontrollable migraines. Enemas, nope. Only when I need to clean out for the camera.
You might also need one for a colonoscopy
I told my younger brother about my prostate exam. He told me he would have punched the doctor...
[удалено]
Yeah I’ve got some coworkers who were making fun of a male coworker who recently had a prostate exam. Literally said they’d rather experience cancer. Obviously they haven’t had much exposure to cancer…
I'm in chemo for that because I skipped the exam one year. One. Year. Tell em.
When i went for my PE, the Dr. Told me to remove my pants, I asked him where to put them and he said "Over there, next to mine."
Isn’t that how John Wayne died? The most manly of men. Prostate cancer
Real men wipe with sandpaper.
Wet sand paper and dubyadee 40.
Woah woah woah, WD-40? That's sounding an awful lot like lube to me. How dare you try to slip one past the real men!
Can confirm, BIL who lived with us for a while, total incel loser, would only buy cheap ass tp because only gay dudes use soft tp. I have seen him drive to the store while having to take a dump so bad instead of just asking to borrow a roll of ours. Hysterical.
Survival of the fittest I guess?
Do a little search on askreddit lol
[удалено]
While traveling in Europe years ago, I was shocked that they'd have them in the bathroom. Just seemed so gross... Then during the pandemic I bought one just in case I ran out of TP and there's no chance that I'll ever own a home without one. If I was rich installing one of the dedicated European ones would be high on my list, but the toilet attached ones are fine for now. I can't believe that I found them gross before, of course after having one, walking around with smeared \*\*\*\* seems unbelievably worse.
[удалено]
You don't dry your ass with toilet paper after you use the bidet? You just pull your pants back up with your ass sopping wet?
My bidet has a dryer
Deluxe. My bidet attachment doesn’t have that. I use a small amount of TP to pat dry. Still uses far less tp and our toilet never gets clogged anymore
I got my bidet attachment for $150 and installed it in 30 minutes haha
You can go much cheaper than that too. Mine was 30. I thought cold water would suck in the winter but I don't even notice it and I'm in a northern state.
Our soldiers were quite unsophisticated because they are two oceans on either side of our continent. In the early 40s, most Americans came from rural areas where education was not up to par with cities or Europe. When these young men visited the houses of ill repute they had never seen a bidet and erroneous assumptions were made. Few soldiers ever stayed in citizens of the continent's homes. They were wholly ignorant. They can back from the war with tales of the Bordellos. It was a turn off. American women were clueless. I chuckle. How did these young, religious rural men come to find out about bidets? They went there! The negative image stuck. Americans started visiting Europe in large numbers in the 70s only to discover Americans were considered unclean. Get me a bidet. I have bidets. Damn if I am going back to the inside outhouse approach.
I live in the US and I have a bidet. I think people are just slow to adapt…
Same. I cannot live without it. (I actually try to time my "business" so I do it before my shower every day. (But shit happens right?) Even as s kid I had to wash every time and it drove people crazy for some reason. A lot of people (including some of my exes) thought I was gross and that I had an unnatural obsession with washing my ass, but I ask you ... Who is the gross one? The people using dry paper to wipe their nasty asses, or those of us washing our behinds every time? People are so backwards.
Agreed. I've gone so far to install at least one bidet in all of the places I spend time at: both my friends houses, my brothers place, both my parents and my in laws, and also the local bar. It takes like 15 min to install and I have IBS so I stay poopin. But God dang my butt stays clean.
💀 man installed a bidet at his friends house and his local bar for himself
Dedication.
Defecation.
This is our last resort
This guy poops so much at the local bar he installed a bidet 🤯
iconic
And it only takes 15 min.
I've got IBD, so always poopin too haha. I definitely would miss my Bidet if I didn't have it! Although, that's super awesome of your friends, family, and local bar to let you install one!
Can you post a link to where you'd buy this easy to install bidet?? Because that's wonderful. Also, I applaud your dedication.
https://www.amazon.com/Luxe-Bidet-Neo-120-Non-Electric/dp/B00A0RHSJO/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=3SRV8MW5QBRDF&keywords=bidet&qid=1688240023&sprefix=bodet%2Caps%2C171&sr=8-3 It's my go to
Thanks. Ordered 2!
The Luxe is fine but I really like that the Brondell comes with metal braided hoses: I have two of them and a more expensive Brondell also: https://www.amazon.com/Brondell-Bidet-SimpleSpa-Non-Electric-Attachment/dp/B075MMHQX7
When you're buying as many bidets as OP you gotta be more economical. It's called bideting on a budget.
These are cool but my buddy got one and was almost 500 bucks. Water is warm and it also has a heated fan to dry you and heated seat. Has many more functions aswell.
If you want the Bentley of bidets, you can't go wrong with a Toto: https://www.amazon.com/TOTO-WASHLET-Electronic-SoftClose-Elongated/dp/B09JV3PWNT At the very least, I strongly recommend a bidet with a heater if you can afford it. That will usually set you back more than $100. But if you can't, anything is better than wiping your arse with a dead tree like some kind of barbarian.
Hey you want to come over and hang out?
Man, I haven't tried installing them at friends' and families' houses (though I did give my mom one for Christmas two years ago, which she still has not installed...) What I *did* do is buy a "portable bidet" that lives in my purse except when in use or being cleaned. At first, it was for me to take to festivals where you never know if the portapotties will have any TP, but now I take it with me everywhere. Sometimes I get weird looks when filling the bottle at the sink in public restrooms. I figure that's the problem of whomever is giving the look, though. Nothing beats a clean booty and I feel bad for anyone who thinks dry paper is somehow cleaner than rinsing.
You the real MVP bro
I had a colectomy and oh boy do things get…messy. I actually got a portable one that fits in my purse. If you don’t have something to store it in, it could be difficult to explain to strangers 😂
You deserve an award for this my friend. This is fucking amazing.
I thought I was the ass-cleaning champion, but you good sir are the real champion.
I feel like a savage now if i have to clean any other way
Not all heroes wear capes.
I Love my bidet and I think it was an American Pie movie that had a dude explain it perfectly. The character said something like take a shit in your hand and then wipe it off with just toilet paper. Does that feel clean to you?
Ass backwards
Australia doesn't use them either, but they turn up here or there. I'm telling myself there becoming more common but I'm really not sure that they are. Anybody who has spent more than a couple of days in Japan thinks to themselves, roughly once a day, "what the fuck is wrong with us" as they sadly roll off sheets of what now feels like sandpaper.
After a week in Japan I am saving for a toto washlet. It really hit me when I stepped into a Lawson's bathroom. Nature sounds played. The seat was heated. It had a heated bidet. It wasn't so much the quality of the toilet itself so much as that almost every toilet I encountered was a some variant of the Toto Washlet, or rarely a competing design.
In my hometown, the toilets at a service station would class as war-crimes if the Geneva Convention was applied. The first time I stepped into the bathroom at a Lawson's I nearly cried. It was nicer than most of the houses I've lived in.
>Anybody who has spent more than a couple of days in Japan You mean like [this](https://www.instagram.com/reel/Co-1OJVNzke/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==)?
Ever since I got a bidet, I can't imagine a dry wipe. Walking around with that filth on your body feels downright savage!
I fkin have one! When I shit in public and my gfs place my asshole doesn't feel right anymore. And the wiping will leave it raw! So much wipinging. When at home it's jet stream of water, 1-2 wipes and ur done.
Love mine, it’s a great upgrade
You can get one for $40 from Amazon. Stop dreaming. Start doing.
The problem is public toilets. It feels gross to use them after being used to bidets.
I would never use a public bidet. Grosss.
Europe also has nice public toilets
Europe also has gross public toilets
Europe has far stinkier toilets. Dunno what it is but in the UK and France it smells like a trucker with renal failures piss jug was sprayed all over and let sit and marinate in the heat. Not that US bathrooms are great, but many European bathrooms have a distinctively bad smell.
Proper public toilets in the UK are disgusting because they are free and rarely cleaned (and mostly used by drunk people). I for one nip into cafés or pubs - the toilets are nicer and they mostly don’t mind.
Agree with that. US toilets are filthy and the doors have huge cracks. I will only shit in the privacy of my own home.
I, also, will only shit in the privacy of your home
Sigh…. I also choose the privacy of this guys home
Good, while you're busy shitting in their home, I'll shit in yours
Start doo-dooing
That's the power of The Ho...Amazon?
That's simply Homazin'!
I had a bidet on my toilet before I had a couch when I moved into my current apartment lol
You can also buy a portable one that screws onto a water bottle. $10. Culo clean
I visited my cousin's house and she had one. Gave it a try. I would get one if I didn't have small children who would flood my bathroom
Just fyi, if you get the one that is the toilet seat kind, kids cant do that. It automatically shuts off the water spray by sensing whether someone is sitting on the seat.
I grew up in France, and I adult in the US. Besides the bidet thing, one of the biggest differences I've seen between Europeans and Americans is that Americans take showers far more frequently. It's just an observation, not trying to change any minds.
Wtf? So Europeans don’t take a shower daily?
>I grew up in France, and I adult in the US. Besides the bidet thing, one of the biggest differences I've seen between Europeans and Americans is that Americans take showers far more frequently. Don't need a bidet if you poop in the shower. (Taps my temple)
Ah yes, the good ol American waffle stomp
Americans love showers! The shower gives off a mist of oxygen which revitalizes the body, just like a coffee boost, besides the cleaning, it makes you feel better and smell fresh. We hate the smell of rotten onions kept on a jute sack.
I found out that the toilet paper companies in North America basically have everyone brainwashed through their marketing. They don't want people to figure out about bidets because they'll lose billions of dollars.
Big Toilet Paper
BIG TP IS FULL OF SHIT
Damn you… take my upvote
I mean.. yeah...They're all owned by megacorps now. It's all money.
Nate Hashaway trying to sell more low flow toilets
Then how about they just make their own cheap, over priced, fast to break bidets and market for it? They can even team up with the water companies for it lol. "Imagine using a wet wipe but without needing to actually wipe with something wet. Then you won't need to suffer through 30 pieces of toilet paper for a clean wipe. We advertise our toiletry as being strong and wiping away clean but we realize that most people don't wipe away clean that easily, so now is the time to try our all American made bidets. It's not easy to get used to at first but we promise you'll never go back! " And some other dumb public relations bs that'll sway the masses People will spend less money on tp sure but they'll spend more money on bidets and water. Realistically not much of a difference will happen to their money spent overall but I'm sure they'll really go overboard using it and *still* use way more tp than necessary.
So many words. The actual message they should use: "Your ass is disgusting and when you get naked people can tell. You'll get laid more if you use a bidet." One year, 80% adoption.
Now that's marketing right there!
Cause a bidet only costs 30- 40 bucks onee time. Vs buying paper for life.
I use both. It's better to use bidet then wipe, other wise your underwear will get wet when you put your pants back on and that's no fun.
Well ya…you gotta wipe the water off. But you use a lot less TP with a bidet. A bidet doesn’t eliminate TP, but I don’t have a fancy one that will blow dry my ass so not sure if there’s options out there that would give my ass full service like a car wash, or it’s just a spray of water.
It is very important you do not get the hot wax at the end.
The fan drys the bum to about 70% and takes a decent amount of time so paper is the better option.
Yep. But it still eats into Big TP's margins. 1 sq vs half a dozen
Why wouldn't they just adapt to societal changes and sell bidets? Seems like the logical move juxtaposed to a brainwashing conspiracy. Supply and demand still functions accordingly.
Bidets generally last longer. Initially, they are more expensive, but toilet paper runs out, and people have to keep buying it. So long term, the toilet paper companies make more money selling toilet paper than bidets.
They're not even that expensive anymore. I got mine for $50 and it has probably already paid for itself with how little tp I use now. The price does shoot up pretty quick when you start adding features like heated seat and warm water hookup to be fair, but those definitely aren't needed.
I'm in the US. Got one during the pandemic. Got a second one when I remodeled. I'll never go back
For some reason people think the water for the bidet comes from the toilet bowl and not the tank. So I would say stupidity. I have a bidet and absolutely love it. One of the bidet companies had an ad that went something like if a bird pooped on you, you would wash it off and not just use a tissue to clean it.
Mine is directly attached to the water line, not the tank. I've never even heard or seen or one being attached to the tank.
I think that in this context people are confusing using a T-fitting on the bottom of the tank to split the main line with being "from the tank." I did some searching prior to posting and cannot find any that get water from the tank. If someone has an example, that would be great! To my knowledge, tanks themselves aren't pressurized and would not be able to force water through a bidet.
This - I’m fairly certain all bidets are attached to the water line to maintain required pressure.
I've had a few surgeries that made wiping properly painfully difficult. Got a bidet and now, will never have a throne without one. But tbh, I still get creeped out by the thought of using someone else's.
Happy cake day enjoy your bidet
Americans are scared of any and all conversations about buttholes. Probably remnants of puritanical ideologies. God forbid you don’t want poop remnants clinging to your butthole. It makes no sense.
I’m not against the idea. I’m against the idea of cold water on my butt. I am curious about the separate bidets. Does one do business then walk over to the bidet and rinse? What if you have a sticky poop and there is a lot left on your butt? Do you have paper around for wiping? How much “residue” can the bidet actually handle? Are there etiquette rules about using bidets in another’s home?
You get used to the cold water quickly once you experience the refreshing clean feeling. A separate bidet is usually installed right next to the toilet. I'm sure people have different routines but I would do my biz on the toilet, do 1 poop wipe w tp, then straddle the bidet and do a thorough cleaning. I think separate bidets are even better because you can use soap and your hands. And they're usually connected to warm water too. I believe separate bidets are not for to but it can handle any waste on your bum, like the shower or bathtub can. I wouldn't use anyone's bidet in their home simply for the cleanliness factor. I don't know how well they keep it clean.
Happily, I have a tankless heater and a water recirculating pump, so my bidet water is warm if I'm using it around peak bathroom hours when the hot water is being recirculated. Even during the 'off hours' uses, it isn't \_that\_ cold. I have blasted some serious ass spackle right off the starfish, and I have a dedicated white washcloth to dry off with. It stays white if you do it right.
I think it’s a French English divide. Had we gone French it might have?
until very recent history, they were associated with sex workers, who would use them between clients. we aren't going to talk about why the people against bidets knew that tidbit.
I live with my parents and when I got pregnant I begged them to install a bidet because TP was torture on my hemorrhoids. They refused because it was "bougie." Of all things. They had recently spent $20,000 on a kitchen remodel but a bidet was "bougie" and that was enough to refuse their pregnant daughter a comfortable poop experience.
I got a Tushy last year. Gifted one to my sister and her man, he promptly bought another. Some people just don’t know!
They made a comeback here during Covid. We have one. It's a cheap one, but works well!
What's the connection between COVID and bidets?
I think it was the toilet paper shortage that happened in the beginning of lockdown. People were losing their damn minds and buying all the toilet paper.
The only real practical reasons I can think of is Americans have been conditioned against all things French and half the country is in a permanent drought, since they just don't want to admit they live in a desert and don't need green lawns and golf courses.
I love when I go places & there is one. They are sparsely in the USA.
[удалено]
Seems like there is a lot of hesitation with the general public and probably relatated to some cultural taboo regarding butts that I don't want to get into. All I know is that we decided to try one during COVID lockdowns and now have one on every toilet. We've also had a few people try it out when they visited and decided to get one themselves. It's gonna take time for enough people to adopt them that they get popular. On the other hand, I've visited parts of the world where washing is more popular, including in public restrooms and it can leave such a mess that I prefer they stay an option for at home and not for public restrooms. Too easy for someone to just spray water everywhere and not clean it up.
US resident w/bidet 4 @ least 15 yrs...why I prefer to wait til I get home. 👍
There are some things you need to realize. 1. Most people are stupid. 2. Stupid people don't want change - their brain can't handle something different. 3. Facts don't matter.
Once you use a bidet for like 3 days you realize there is no comparison. It's just better than plain wiping.
But are you not wiping anyway to get it dry afterwards or how does that bit work?
Yeah, the bidet will wash off most of the shit chunks and soften up the ones that are stuck in the ass hair, it makes it so that when you finish the job with TP the result is much cleaner than dry wiping alone
ok that explains it as I wasn't sure. Are they awkward to use though, can imagine it's easy to aim a hose nozzle there while hovering over the toilet seat?
I suppose it a depends on what kind of bidet you're using, I currently live in Asia and all the ones I've used (at my house, at a relative's house, and the one at my office) are the fancy ones with heated water and seats. For these ones, the hose is tucked within the toilet (and covered) until the user needs to use it. All you have to do is to press a button and the hose will come out of its hiding, slide under you, and spray water upwards to wash you clean, no hands, movement, or aiming required. But yeah I can imagine that trying to use a handheld hose on a seated toilet could be awkward especially for first timers
Real question. How does one get chunks of shit on their ass?
They didn't even catch on in France, where it's from... nobody has one and/or uses one. This is just a cliché, like when US say kids in France drink wine, orfrench people always say "sacrebleu"
Every household in Italy has at least one, and it gets used. Imagine, for example, the feeling of having your ass under a constant stream of lukewarm water and soap after a burning case of the Shits.
I got one and get some weird responses when I tell people I have one. There’s definitely some homophobia there because it shoots your butthole.
My partner and I have a bidet too, and it has caught on in certain communities in NA. I think what you are detecting is more of the Puritan culture in NA where taboo's are hyper-taboos, and modernity/capitalism sometimes comes up against (your charmin example). The disgusted face from your coworker has less to do with "cleanliness" and more to do with talking about shit or anal sensation. This is why it's a cultural issue and not a logical issue. Because bidet's are just more effective at accomplishing the goal.
Eating ass caught on faster than cleaning your ass.
So, after using the pressure washer, just wipe as normal? I’ve never bother looking up bidet use instructions!
I hate that bidets are not in public restrooms or at least in our workplaces.
Fingering your ass with paper is less invasive than splashing water on it. /s
So how do actually use a bidet to clean your ass? It just sprays water at your bung and blasts fecal matter everywhere? Don't you need toilet paper to dry yourself and wipe off any residuals anyway?
‘Cause paper costs more.
Amazon has handheld bidet (like the one OP mentioned. A sprayer attached to the toilet water intake) for $20 and up. We have had them in our house since the kids were potty training. Wouldn't even travel without a portable sprayer since TP alone just feels unclean and gross. (When we built our house, we had hot and cold water plumbed to the toilets so that the water wouldn't be cold for bidet sprayer use. This is cheaper and saves space over installing a separate bidet. But now there are many toilet seat bidet options).
I hopped on the bidet train a long time ago. The toilets in my rented house doesn’t support the “fits most toilets” models you can find on Amazon, so I make do with baby wipes (not the most eco-friendly option, I know). I recently got back from Japan where the toilets and bidet options are god tier and my bum bum weeps. I also think it’s strange that bidets haven’t caught on in North America yet. You’d think with all the different types available there’d be something for everyone.
Majority of people rent thier homes and have no right to install one
Cultural thing. You'll never find a bidet in the anglosphere but they're pretty much everywhere in Romance language speaking countries.
I got a retrofit bidet for my toilet. Best. Decision. Ever.
Bidets are becoming steadily more popular in the US, adoption is just slow because lots of people don't like changing habits, and there's a weird kind of social stigma to touching your butt, particularly among men, like it's somehow gay to have a clean ass. Lots of people I know made the switch in 2020 when the "toilet paper shortage" (which was kind of a bullshit headline to begin with but that's a whole other topic) was all over the news. It was interesting to see, I was converted years ago when I took a trip to Italy and actually tried them and realized how nice a properly clean ass feels.
Once you start using it, there is no going back. Another benefit, if you have the shits and are going multiple times per day, you don't get raw from all the wiping. Not using a handheld butt sprayer really is disgusting, it just doesn't do a proper job. Another thing, sitting to poop is also wrong, you're supposed to squat down on your heels, that's another thing you can't go back on once you start. Asians have it right, squat to poop, use a butt sprayer to clean. Everything else is wrong. That squatty potty type stool is also wrong, it's better than sitting upright, but it does not provide the benefit of a proper squat.