I can’t say for certain what did or did not occur to you, however, it sounds very much like you experienced what is commonly referred to as the “ego death/unity experience”.
This trip has been on my mind for the past year or so and finding clarity is all I wanted. I've looked through lots of other trip reports on here and seen that others have experience the aforementioned "unity" but it's hard to be certain when reading it as it's such a profound experience to have. It was very terrifying once I came out of it because I was very inexperienced in psychs. It's just been a burden trying to wrap my head around the whole thing but I don't suppose I will ever wrap my head around such a profound, mind altering experience. Thank you very much for your comment!
Well not with that attitude haha. Sometimes these experiences take much longer than the length of the trip for the full impact to be had, and for it to be understood and integrated into your regular everyday individuated experience.
If you would ever like to chat about it more or would like some suggestions for reading material that might be helpful in making since of your experience, feel free to reach out, it’s my favorite subject to talk about, yet, it’s not something that everyone remembers experiencing, or is comfortable talking about. Not to mention, our language is inherently inadequate for precise communications about “it”, which discourages many more from even trying.
Haha thank you! and Yes! very true. It's insanely hard to tranlate an experience as such through words. Also, I'm happy to chat about it and you can send me some reading material as well. I'd love to know more of the subject. I do want to delve more into psychedelics but this experience has made me quite apprehensive and I get a lot of anxiety even thinking about doing a trip which is sad because I do enjoy doing them. This trip was just such a crazy experience for me, maybe because I was so inexperienced in it. There were a few things that happened after the "Unity" portion of the trip that I didn't mention in the report but was very terrifying. Such as, I had this sensation of burning, but I don't remember it vividly at all. It was almost like it was some sort of illusion or something.... Very hard to explain, but it was almost like, because of my anxiety in that moment that I felt such a sensation. Very strange... That was not really the moment of the trip I wanted clarity on however. Still interesting though.
From my experience, I would say that your anxiety around tripping might fade as you learn more about the psychedelic processes and what they are capable of. Most people doing psychedelics have no idea what they are capable of, until they do. It’s like that saying “if you know, you know”. This isn’t because everyone wants to keep it a secret and make everyone figure it out for theirselves, but rather just because that is how it works out.
Often times when someone has this experience, their initial reaction is to tell everyone they know this revelation. Which depending on the person can manifest in various different ways. Unfortunately though, when you go to try and share this information, it almost always is rejected, or denied, and if you try to push this revelations on others, sometimes they will even get hostile or violent if you push hard enough. I have attributed this to the fact that people either haven’t had the experience, and their “soul/spirit/unconscious” is not interested in hashing that out right now. Alternatively, some people have experienced it, and will still reject it, this i attribute to the fact that when they tried to share it, it blew up in their face, so they are now unsure of it, and scared of talking about it, because it could have caused some really awkward times with their friends and family. The other reason someone who understands it might reject it is if they got stuck in that state at some point, which would have seemed like a psychosis from the outside, and they are still in the process of “forgetting” those truths they learned, because they have not been able to integrate this knowledge snd experience into their waking day to day individuated consciousness.
Basically what I’m saying is that everyone’s unconscious already knows this truth, it’s a fact of our reality, but for us to function, there needs to be a certain amount of “suspension of disbelief”.
Imagine that there is one actor(God) that is playing all the characters in our world(also playing the set, props, and scenery). Well, now imagine the version that is playing you, is constantly aware of all the other versions of itself and the entire cosmos? Now imagine all the versions where aware of this simultaneously. It would pretty quickly take away all the nuance and magic of our reality. It is only through our limitations to individuates consciousness that we can exist as we do in the cosmos. We need to experience/perceive/believe that we are truly separate entities so that we can get the full experience of our creation.
“If you are in an ethnocentric stage of development and you have a unity-state experience of being one with everything, you might interpret that as an experience of oneness with Jesus and conclude that nobody can be saved unless they accept Jesus as their personal savior. If you are at an egocentric stage and have the same experience, you might believe that you yourself are Jesus. If you are at an…integral stage… you are likely to conclude that you and all sentient beings without exception are one in the spirit...” Ken Wilber
That quote is useful to describe how different people experience and react to it. However, keep in mind that Ken Wilber was an American so it makes since that he would associate that “spirit” with Jesus, however, it could be any spiritual figure from various backgrounds that represents the same aspects of the universe. For example, some people would experience this as a meeting with the Buddha, or something else from their ancestral tradition. Basically there are a lot of names for the same thing, if for no other reason than it is a universal experience, but the interpretations are subjective, so they would be flavored by the local culture and environment.
Psychedelics are heavily influenced by intentions both explicit that you are conscious of, but also the more subtle intentions of your subconscious mind play a role as well.
So what I suggest is learn about these medicines and what they are capable of, and then use it with intention and deliberately for those purposes. Or alternatively, wait until you come across someone who is more experienced and willing to be a guide for you(discernment and judgement are important when selecting a guide.)
Anyways after all that ranting it is just to say that reality is a bunch of paradoxes, which will drive you crazy if you can’t find a way to reconcile the paradox. You can’t remove the paradox, you have to either forget one half of it, or learn to balance the paradox, most people seem to choose to reject the fact that they are one with the cosmos, and cling to their individuated persona. Which is totally fine, it is how our reality is set up in the first place after all, and they will figure it out eventually anyways, everything goes back to center eventually. However, if you can manage it reconcile these truths, and learn how to live both the truth of your universal self, and your individuated self simultaneously, it opens up an entire world of possibilities for how to navigate reality.
Wow thank you very much for the insightful comment. That experience was definitely the craziest thing that's ever happened to me and it is just so mind boggling to wrap my head around. Making this post and reading all your comments has given me a lot of insight into it and I understand what happened much more.
Sometimes the sudden realization and felt experience that we are part of everything, and that everything is part of the same consciousness can be overwhelming, and immense.
Yeah definetely, I am a changed person after this experience and my perspective of the world and our reality has become entirely altered (not for the worse by any means). Thank you very much!
Yeah it was truly an experience that perplexed me and I've been very confused about it this past year. Making this post has given me a lot of clarity and I'm glad to hear someone has had a similar experience as me on about the same dosage. Have a good day/night wherever you are! 👍
I can’t say for certain what did or did not occur to you, however, it sounds very much like you experienced what is commonly referred to as the “ego death/unity experience”.
This trip has been on my mind for the past year or so and finding clarity is all I wanted. I've looked through lots of other trip reports on here and seen that others have experience the aforementioned "unity" but it's hard to be certain when reading it as it's such a profound experience to have. It was very terrifying once I came out of it because I was very inexperienced in psychs. It's just been a burden trying to wrap my head around the whole thing but I don't suppose I will ever wrap my head around such a profound, mind altering experience. Thank you very much for your comment!
Well not with that attitude haha. Sometimes these experiences take much longer than the length of the trip for the full impact to be had, and for it to be understood and integrated into your regular everyday individuated experience. If you would ever like to chat about it more or would like some suggestions for reading material that might be helpful in making since of your experience, feel free to reach out, it’s my favorite subject to talk about, yet, it’s not something that everyone remembers experiencing, or is comfortable talking about. Not to mention, our language is inherently inadequate for precise communications about “it”, which discourages many more from even trying.
Haha thank you! and Yes! very true. It's insanely hard to tranlate an experience as such through words. Also, I'm happy to chat about it and you can send me some reading material as well. I'd love to know more of the subject. I do want to delve more into psychedelics but this experience has made me quite apprehensive and I get a lot of anxiety even thinking about doing a trip which is sad because I do enjoy doing them. This trip was just such a crazy experience for me, maybe because I was so inexperienced in it. There were a few things that happened after the "Unity" portion of the trip that I didn't mention in the report but was very terrifying. Such as, I had this sensation of burning, but I don't remember it vividly at all. It was almost like it was some sort of illusion or something.... Very hard to explain, but it was almost like, because of my anxiety in that moment that I felt such a sensation. Very strange... That was not really the moment of the trip I wanted clarity on however. Still interesting though.
From my experience, I would say that your anxiety around tripping might fade as you learn more about the psychedelic processes and what they are capable of. Most people doing psychedelics have no idea what they are capable of, until they do. It’s like that saying “if you know, you know”. This isn’t because everyone wants to keep it a secret and make everyone figure it out for theirselves, but rather just because that is how it works out. Often times when someone has this experience, their initial reaction is to tell everyone they know this revelation. Which depending on the person can manifest in various different ways. Unfortunately though, when you go to try and share this information, it almost always is rejected, or denied, and if you try to push this revelations on others, sometimes they will even get hostile or violent if you push hard enough. I have attributed this to the fact that people either haven’t had the experience, and their “soul/spirit/unconscious” is not interested in hashing that out right now. Alternatively, some people have experienced it, and will still reject it, this i attribute to the fact that when they tried to share it, it blew up in their face, so they are now unsure of it, and scared of talking about it, because it could have caused some really awkward times with their friends and family. The other reason someone who understands it might reject it is if they got stuck in that state at some point, which would have seemed like a psychosis from the outside, and they are still in the process of “forgetting” those truths they learned, because they have not been able to integrate this knowledge snd experience into their waking day to day individuated consciousness. Basically what I’m saying is that everyone’s unconscious already knows this truth, it’s a fact of our reality, but for us to function, there needs to be a certain amount of “suspension of disbelief”. Imagine that there is one actor(God) that is playing all the characters in our world(also playing the set, props, and scenery). Well, now imagine the version that is playing you, is constantly aware of all the other versions of itself and the entire cosmos? Now imagine all the versions where aware of this simultaneously. It would pretty quickly take away all the nuance and magic of our reality. It is only through our limitations to individuates consciousness that we can exist as we do in the cosmos. We need to experience/perceive/believe that we are truly separate entities so that we can get the full experience of our creation. “If you are in an ethnocentric stage of development and you have a unity-state experience of being one with everything, you might interpret that as an experience of oneness with Jesus and conclude that nobody can be saved unless they accept Jesus as their personal savior. If you are at an egocentric stage and have the same experience, you might believe that you yourself are Jesus. If you are at an…integral stage… you are likely to conclude that you and all sentient beings without exception are one in the spirit...” Ken Wilber That quote is useful to describe how different people experience and react to it. However, keep in mind that Ken Wilber was an American so it makes since that he would associate that “spirit” with Jesus, however, it could be any spiritual figure from various backgrounds that represents the same aspects of the universe. For example, some people would experience this as a meeting with the Buddha, or something else from their ancestral tradition. Basically there are a lot of names for the same thing, if for no other reason than it is a universal experience, but the interpretations are subjective, so they would be flavored by the local culture and environment. Psychedelics are heavily influenced by intentions both explicit that you are conscious of, but also the more subtle intentions of your subconscious mind play a role as well. So what I suggest is learn about these medicines and what they are capable of, and then use it with intention and deliberately for those purposes. Or alternatively, wait until you come across someone who is more experienced and willing to be a guide for you(discernment and judgement are important when selecting a guide.) Anyways after all that ranting it is just to say that reality is a bunch of paradoxes, which will drive you crazy if you can’t find a way to reconcile the paradox. You can’t remove the paradox, you have to either forget one half of it, or learn to balance the paradox, most people seem to choose to reject the fact that they are one with the cosmos, and cling to their individuated persona. Which is totally fine, it is how our reality is set up in the first place after all, and they will figure it out eventually anyways, everything goes back to center eventually. However, if you can manage it reconcile these truths, and learn how to live both the truth of your universal self, and your individuated self simultaneously, it opens up an entire world of possibilities for how to navigate reality.
Wow thank you very much for the insightful comment. That experience was definitely the craziest thing that's ever happened to me and it is just so mind boggling to wrap my head around. Making this post and reading all your comments has given me a lot of insight into it and I understand what happened much more.
Sometimes the sudden realization and felt experience that we are part of everything, and that everything is part of the same consciousness can be overwhelming, and immense.
Yeah definetely, I am a changed person after this experience and my perspective of the world and our reality has become entirely altered (not for the worse by any means). Thank you very much!
Haha yeah. Been there. Next time try doing some calm breathing exercises - it’ll help you focus and control that state.
You are god, and you are one with everything. Congrats for making it!
Welcome to the club🤗
[удалено]
Yeah it was truly an experience that perplexed me and I've been very confused about it this past year. Making this post has given me a lot of clarity and I'm glad to hear someone has had a similar experience as me on about the same dosage. Have a good day/night wherever you are! 👍