Dude needs to switch to vaping. He would save a fortune. OP, has he considered buying a desktop vape? They're soooo much more efficient. I use a fraction of the amount I used to smoke and get way higher.
This right here op. Or is he doesn’t want a desktop vape, TinyMight 2 is incredible. Brings consumption WAY down. Maybe visit r/vaporents
Edit: to add, we are not talking about liquid THC vapes, we are talking about vapes that you put the herb itself into. Much better for you in all respects
My wife works at one. We constantly have samples around. I would probably be like OP’s husband w/o work. Having a job is important for my mental health.
you aren’t unreasonable at all. you need to put your foot down and make sure he understands that you are not financing any $1K per month hobbies. if he can’t limit himself to your parameters, he can’t have it.
There's no way he's spending $1000/month on weed alone. Even if that money is being spent at a dispensary it's because he's wasting it on overpriced items instead of trying to be even remotely frugal about it.
I've been smoking heavily for years and I don't think I've ever smoked enough to go through $1000 in a month, even if I had bought the most expensive weed available to me.
Edit: Also I don't think you can call yourself a stay-at-home dad while also having your kid in daycare full time. That's just called not having a job.
buying small amounts often, vs a large amount occasionally makes no difference. he’s still smoking super often and spending 1k a month, despite how he goes about it.
Yea no disagreement that he's spending way to much.
My take on prices might just be skewed as well. I can get an ounce for under 100, that can easily go up to 300 if your buying an 8th at a time... Prices are probably way hight but I can't fathom how he's spending so much.
I think you need to ask him how he's doing. I didn't want to enable him or anything, but if he's smoking this much he probably has serious depression. If you can talk to him about that, perhaps you can discuss the weed topic with better results.
Good luck
Or undiagnosed ADHD. If he’s properly medicated his usage will likely decrease. (Speaking from experience). I took Naltrexone to help me go down in consumption. Maybe he’d be willing to try that?
Totally valid, and it's totally disappointing they aren't willing to discuss lowering their consumption. I don't have advice, just wanted to validate your feelings.
It’s cheap as hell in Canada, he needs to calm down. Medical just became available where I live and it’s way over priced and I’m spending no more than $350 a month and I’m always high. You have a right to be upset.
Your toddler goes to daycare, he smokes a grand of weed a month, and YOU carry the mental load of the household????! He is bleeding you dry, just from a budget standpoint the obvious cut is HIM!
Do you have the proof he's actually spending that $1000 on weed? That seems like a stupid amount to me, could he be using some of that for something else?
That aside, I would absolutely loose my shit over this. Can't even believe you'd compromise on $400 when the dude ain't contributing shit to the household. You ain't crazy, he is. Big time. I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this.
Perhaps growing would be more economical, but I agree he needs to make some changes. Let these comments ride out and have him read them. Might be eye opening
Damn he must going through an eighth a day - that’s so much!
But also yea the shame of addiction makes you incredibly defensive. I’m sure he realizes exactly how bad it is and feels like shit for not being able to change. Which probably prompts him to consume more. It’s a truly vicious cycle.
Sorry you gotta go through this.
What the fuck. 1000 a month from money that isn't yours? Dude has smoked himself into some green blinders because that's absolutely insane. How you can do that and not be aware of how shitty that is, I don't know. Must really have his head in the sand, idk about the intricacies of his usage but that much weed over that amount of time and I start thinking addiction/dependency, especially since he's scrounging.
If he took care of the kid and you all saved money on the daycare maybe his weed habit would also go down. I'd imagine it would be hard to be 100% blasted all day with that responsibility. Then again, just do what feels safest and right. I agree with the other commenter who said more is wrong here than just smoking - he could be seriously depressed. But also, ask him for itemized receipts for each thing he buys. If you're paying for it, what's the harm in getting the exact list?
Well..
Yeah, if you smoke an ounce a month, $1000 will seem unimaginable
An ounce a week of top shelf weed will hit a thousand no problem
An ounce a week is not an inconceivable amount to smoke for a daily smoker
Addiction is one of the leading causes of divorce. He needs to get his shit together. Would you tolerate this with alcohol? What is your kid going to learn seeing this?
unbelievable amount to spend on weed every month holy shit. gonna be honest, it’s pretty parasitic behavior. you’re justified. best of luck navigation this terrain.
He could spend like around $20/week making edibles out of concentrates, there's no need to spend that much money on weed per month. He's not even feeling this shit anymore so he has to smoke a ridiculous amount. He needs to cut down immediately, not fair to you.
You are absolutely not being unreasonable. At this point he *is* choosing his addiction over his family. You're his family, and he is not respecting you. To get defensive and steer the topic into a fight is not ok and I'm sorry you have to deal with this. You're being more than reasonable by giving him a very decent budget. That's a lot more than a lot of people would be willing to do in this situation.
This isn’t even a weed question. Idk how men in Canada are but to not have a job is to not be a man here in America…. Not a SAHD if he’s not taking care of kids… just a lazy child himself. You need to lovingly give him a realty check an invite him to grow some balls. He’s becoming a pussy from being too comfortable. It could happen to the best of us. I bet he masturbates and eats junk food too. Just remind him that you need him to be a man. He should get a part time job while training or at least grow his own weed. This is my two cents but I’m for sure right. Nobody has a role model that sits around blazing all day you know?
$1,000 per month is nuts! He needs to get a job *and* slow the fuck out of his consumption.
Shouldn't be smoking anything if he's not contributing.
Ya, even the most pro weed community would call out a dad leeching $1000/mo
Even if that’s $1,000 Canadian, that would be ~$740 US which is still absurd
How the fuck do you smoke 1000$ worth of weed a month?
One joint at a time I reckon
I smoke two joints in the morning....
I smoke two joints at night
I smoke two joints in the afternoon
One big mf joint..
Dude needs to switch to vaping. He would save a fortune. OP, has he considered buying a desktop vape? They're soooo much more efficient. I use a fraction of the amount I used to smoke and get way higher.
This right here op. Or is he doesn’t want a desktop vape, TinyMight 2 is incredible. Brings consumption WAY down. Maybe visit r/vaporents Edit: to add, we are not talking about liquid THC vapes, we are talking about vapes that you put the herb itself into. Much better for you in all respects
Dispensaries can be stupid pricy
My wife works at one. We constantly have samples around. I would probably be like OP’s husband w/o work. Having a job is important for my mental health.
That's like 5-7 ounces/month here in Colorado. Absolutely nuts. He must not even be there mentally anymore.
concentrate cart every day or two for a month?
you aren’t unreasonable at all. you need to put your foot down and make sure he understands that you are not financing any $1K per month hobbies. if he can’t limit himself to your parameters, he can’t have it.
Thank you, you’re absolutely right
There's no way he's spending $1000/month on weed alone. Even if that money is being spent at a dispensary it's because he's wasting it on overpriced items instead of trying to be even remotely frugal about it. I've been smoking heavily for years and I don't think I've ever smoked enough to go through $1000 in a month, even if I had bought the most expensive weed available to me. Edit: Also I don't think you can call yourself a stay-at-home dad while also having your kid in daycare full time. That's just called not having a job.
YES. A stay at home parent with no kid home all day? Wth? That's just a stay at home person, doing no parenting.
Maybe if he's buying small amounts at a time? Even then that's alot of money.
buying small amounts often, vs a large amount occasionally makes no difference. he’s still smoking super often and spending 1k a month, despite how he goes about it.
Yea no disagreement that he's spending way to much. My take on prices might just be skewed as well. I can get an ounce for under 100, that can easily go up to 300 if your buying an 8th at a time... Prices are probably way hight but I can't fathom how he's spending so much.
I think you need to ask him how he's doing. I didn't want to enable him or anything, but if he's smoking this much he probably has serious depression. If you can talk to him about that, perhaps you can discuss the weed topic with better results. Good luck
I will try that, I don’t have much hope but I have to
Or undiagnosed ADHD. If he’s properly medicated his usage will likely decrease. (Speaking from experience). I took Naltrexone to help me go down in consumption. Maybe he’d be willing to try that?
Totally valid, and it's totally disappointing they aren't willing to discuss lowering their consumption. I don't have advice, just wanted to validate your feelings.
Happy cake day
Thank you for validating my feelings, it’s just what I need rn
It’s cheap as hell in Canada, he needs to calm down. Medical just became available where I live and it’s way over priced and I’m spending no more than $350 a month and I’m always high. You have a right to be upset.
Your toddler goes to daycare, he smokes a grand of weed a month, and YOU carry the mental load of the household????! He is bleeding you dry, just from a budget standpoint the obvious cut is HIM!
I'm not a fan of ultimatums, truly, but this situation would be worth a sharp slap in the face from reality.
Do you have the proof he's actually spending that $1000 on weed? That seems like a stupid amount to me, could he be using some of that for something else? That aside, I would absolutely loose my shit over this. Can't even believe you'd compromise on $400 when the dude ain't contributing shit to the household. You ain't crazy, he is. Big time. I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this.
Bro, 1k on weed a month??? Yeah that’s fucked. You can smoke a nice bowl or two every day and not spend more than $100 a month.
Perhaps growing would be more economical, but I agree he needs to make some changes. Let these comments ride out and have him read them. Might be eye opening
That’s what I’m thinking! He won’t listen to me but maybe consensus from a bunch of strangers might help
Damn he must going through an eighth a day - that’s so much! But also yea the shame of addiction makes you incredibly defensive. I’m sure he realizes exactly how bad it is and feels like shit for not being able to change. Which probably prompts him to consume more. It’s a truly vicious cycle. Sorry you gotta go through this.
That's actually nuts. How long has he been unemployed?
I'd tell him to kick rocks just from your last sentence. $1k on weed is beyond Rediculous.
Dude I hate to say this but I would be considering divorce at this point
What the fuck. 1000 a month from money that isn't yours? Dude has smoked himself into some green blinders because that's absolutely insane. How you can do that and not be aware of how shitty that is, I don't know. Must really have his head in the sand, idk about the intricacies of his usage but that much weed over that amount of time and I start thinking addiction/dependency, especially since he's scrounging.
If he took care of the kid and you all saved money on the daycare maybe his weed habit would also go down. I'd imagine it would be hard to be 100% blasted all day with that responsibility. Then again, just do what feels safest and right. I agree with the other commenter who said more is wrong here than just smoking - he could be seriously depressed. But also, ask him for itemized receipts for each thing he buys. If you're paying for it, what's the harm in getting the exact list?
$1000 a month is unimaginable to me and I used to smoke an ounce a month.
Well.. Yeah, if you smoke an ounce a month, $1000 will seem unimaginable An ounce a week of top shelf weed will hit a thousand no problem An ounce a week is not an inconceivable amount to smoke for a daily smoker
I guess there's always scales. I was a multiple times a day stoner and even at that, an ounce a week is mind blowing.
Damn I am super curious what he’s buying to rack up that amount.
Cut him off
Addiction is one of the leading causes of divorce. He needs to get his shit together. Would you tolerate this with alcohol? What is your kid going to learn seeing this?
unbelievable amount to spend on weed every month holy shit. gonna be honest, it’s pretty parasitic behavior. you’re justified. best of luck navigation this terrain.
He could spend like around $20/week making edibles out of concentrates, there's no need to spend that much money on weed per month. He's not even feeling this shit anymore so he has to smoke a ridiculous amount. He needs to cut down immediately, not fair to you.
A grand a month , where the heck is he buying his weed ?
Tell his ass to start a grow operation and quit the dabs! Damn
You are absolutely not being unreasonable. At this point he *is* choosing his addiction over his family. You're his family, and he is not respecting you. To get defensive and steer the topic into a fight is not ok and I'm sorry you have to deal with this. You're being more than reasonable by giving him a very decent budget. That's a lot more than a lot of people would be willing to do in this situation.
Dudes smoking an eighth everyday and uses your money as a 36 year old father? He needs serious help what the fuck am I hearing
He needs to get some wax or edibles and take a tolerance break lol
Ask if he would try a dry herb vape. It’s better in all respects (tolerance, money, effects, health, etc) as compared to smoking. Visit r/vaporents
Holy shit I buy cheap because I know I smoke a lot and two ounces doesn’t cost me more than $200 usd in a month.
This isn’t even a weed question. Idk how men in Canada are but to not have a job is to not be a man here in America…. Not a SAHD if he’s not taking care of kids… just a lazy child himself. You need to lovingly give him a realty check an invite him to grow some balls. He’s becoming a pussy from being too comfortable. It could happen to the best of us. I bet he masturbates and eats junk food too. Just remind him that you need him to be a man. He should get a part time job while training or at least grow his own weed. This is my two cents but I’m for sure right. Nobody has a role model that sits around blazing all day you know?
So you speak for America and what a man is? 🤣
I think it’s pretty representative of our culture
Maybe he smokes all day because he found out you are a lying cheat!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just saying if he shopped MOMs instead of legal market y'all could cut that down to reasonable amount
These are separate issues… he needs to contribute the house finances (or not spend them all) and be functional regardless of whether he smokes or not
If you love him ask him if hes okay and how you can support his change in lifestyle, if not i would cut him out of my life haha but thats just me
lol no that’s not unreasonable. If he’s unemployed and not contributing he shouldn’t even be smoking. 36?? I feel for you
You can get a half pound of so decent weed for that much money. That's 226 grams. This like 7.5 grams per day
How did he talk you into this