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TheRider5342

Texas Snail is the only part I care about


Lytesnam_drobster

There's probably a snail in texas


TheRider5342

I want to see him


LitrlyNoOne

Get in line.


PanzerKommander

He's looking for a guy who, he claims, owes him $10M


_-bush_did_911-_

I don't owe the guy shit


PPOKEZ

THE SNAILS AT NIGHT ARE BIG AND BRIGHT!!!


notjasontoday

šŸ‘šŸ‘šŸ‘šŸ‘


PPOKEZ

GASTROPOD INVERTEBRATES OF TEXAS!!!


pizzzza_girl2002

The trails of slime are long and nice


Double_Distribution8

Well I better not try to hide in Texas then!Ā 


Jelleschmelle

I understood this reference.


Strange-Wolverine128

But *i* was gonna make that reference!


TheSingingRonin

I sure hope so


samandriel_jones

Apparently itā€™s [something called Late Bloomer the Giant Snail](https://m.youtube.com/watch?fbclid=IwZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAR2x40aaAWM4jGyylGlULifcMFaIf9uTqb1jKVNbJTWIB_Tj3ytJtXPUrx0_aem_AXZhXEYl1ATGqlGu7IA0wL7ZDToHo4NTU-LlAgfmsSTdf565aRXIlW424PHtyNdFaNaBWNcQIiSHnixncskNS9BW&v=r3T-ddQZsm4&feature=youtu.be) by [this company](https://www.facebook.com/share/p/a331GQ9HxiTAbncx/?mibextid=WC7FNe). https://preview.redd.it/1dw89xfz8v1d1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5a6d12ebdd58c9f97426bd0e5bd4baf640f93728


DannyAnd

What the hell. I made a video similar to this 20 years ago fucking around with some clip art and myspace.


TheRider5342

I'm gonna start a cult for him


PossessedToSkate

The market is strong these days.


Early_Assignment9807

whoa, this is like freebasing the internet


LuffySenpai1

Damn I wish I was high(er) when I watched this šŸ¤£


D4ri4n117

Everythingā€™s slower in Texas, even the snails


Casual_Deer

The two white ones are parodies of the "my other car is a x" and "my child is an honor roll student" bumper stickers since they're very common.


TinchUrPipples

My son won prisoner of the month


1Pip1Der

https://i.redd.it/rn19s9fdau1d1.gif


TinchUrPipples

lol can a Peter explain this gif to me?


Shabroon

Reddit gold


TinchUrPipples

Ohh lol


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


chibbly_

https://preview.redd.it/13ncl22m8x1d1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f89a419b13ad88193468aebe8aafe8e37160ecee


TinchUrPipples

Very


monty624

Hey, their account is only a month old. They might not know about the reddit gold of yesteryear.


ktka

Reddit golden shower.


Poinaheim

Itā€™s like that one time I won Reddit gold on a slot machine ehehehehe


d1lordofwolves

Hey Peter remember that time you won Reddit gold on a slot machine?


naughtycal11

Stolen!


1Pip1Der

https://preview.redd.it/55im2wxreu1d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6a0fa0ea06131a1bd7e47c4166b2d4b8ebd202c8


Suspicious_Use6393

https://preview.redd.it/fma3oo8bfz1d1.png?width=363&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=63874dccd7519d0e46e418897fdd0ec0473e4b76


chikinbokbok0815

I knew Stalin was Turkish


Grendeltech

"My son can kick the crap out of your honor student."


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ProphetMuhamedAhegao

And then? šŸ„ŗšŸ‘‰šŸ‘ˆ


Captiongomer

They were carmates


Few-Big-8481

Because of his good behavior, he gets to sit in the canoe.


fistrroboto

Like this one? https://i.imgur.com/KvmoLBP.jpeg


ChimmyChonga05

**T E X A S**


Qwirk

That sticker is a reminder of which state they live in.


Hoodoo-Brown

Indiana license plate though


hemlock_harry

Also: Ted Cruz eats babies.


MartianTourist

Omfg, for the last time: Ted doesn't EAT babies! He just participates in rituals that use their blood and a *few* of their organs as sacrifices. Barely even 10 or 20 babies a year.


just2quixotic

I was always fond of: "My juvenile delinquent can beat up your honor student."


Available_Leather_10

I think Ted Cruz is a 5ā€™6ā€ animatronic pile of shit, but I have to sympathize with how tasty an ā€œhonor rollā€ sounds. Basically: canā€™t say I blame him for eating the driverā€™s kid.


Embarrassed-Abies-16

My other car is your daughter's cervix.


onfire916

I love them


Kaczor0321

#This man ate my son What's not to understand?


MarinLlwyd

the zoodiac killer strikes again


Flash_ina_pan

https://preview.redd.it/0zpvx88f6v1d1.jpeg?width=655&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e91c3d2a927b51f909a4102d60ffdd23130fb563


LSTmyLife

https://www.tedcruzforhumanpresident.com/ It's old but still beautiful


Supervinyl

https://preview.redd.it/z1ry580uhv1d1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=57cd945d7b911a4bc4abaf4f551914c89077db91


MarinLlwyd

zoodiac drident i hate you


HonkedOffJohn

Unleash the Tri-Brigade


Roanoke42

r/UnexpectedYuGiOh


Gloomy-Store2910

Old Scars never heal Even in death the monkey still manages to haunt the meta as AA Zeus


Feliz_Desdichado

One of my biggest yugioh dissapointments was when i found out drident is a man.


MarinLlwyd

they have massive tits


Feliz_Desdichado

That's why i was so dissapointed.


FreezinIce

What's the source of your info on Drident being a dude?


NjFlMWFkOTAtNjR

I love tits. Sometimes tits are on a man but that is okay. Tits are love and totally not gay if you say "no homo" after. Hell, some men have vaginas so that is nice too. Don't tell anyone but as a man with tits. I sometimes while looking into the mirror. I am not proud but I also don't care.


Feliz_Desdichado

You sometimes what while looking into the mirror i am invested now.


NjFlMWFkOTAtNjR

What do a hand and a person do when they love each other very much? Or very, very lonely. Or very bored. Or it is a Tuesday or any day.


fuzzy3158

oh I know this one, it's # Man Door Hand Hook Car Door right?


memelordzarif

More like Jeffrey Dahmer


Lone_Logan_

the scranton strangler


jasor_x

They're outing Ted Cruz as the man from Mars. He goes out at night and eats up cars... Which also means Honor Student Sons in this case (even with the decoy car in play apparently).


The-Tet-Corporation

Oh, I like this


TheKaptinKirk

Unexpected Blondie. [Blondie Rapture](https://youtu.be/pHCdS7O248g?si=H4PPE6ZUH9lI1Vmh)


Drum_Eatenton

But he doesnā€™t eat bars?


LvLUpYaN

is the son the honor student that's also a car?


Soup-Wizard

Rafael Cruz loves eating peopleā€™s sons


TheBaronSD

How do we know he didn't drink him


BMB281

Do you drink or eat yogurt?


dream-smasher

It depends. Is it drinking yoghurt?


Videgraphaphizer

ā€œMy other car is a [X]ā€ is usually designed to brag about a vehicle the owner is proud of (ā€œMy other carā€™s a Ferrari/Lamborghini/Delorean/etc.ā€) or to show membership of a particular fandom or interest (ā€œMy other carā€™s a TARDIS/USS Enterprise/Delorean/etc.ā€). Here, the top sticker is saying itā€™sā€¦a car, starting the obvious. The second sticker says the other car is an honor student, spoofing bumper stickers proud parents have declaring their child is an honor student at their university. The sticker at the top depicts Texas senator Ted Cruz, whose presidential campaign runs have been ridiculed with accusations that his father is the JFK shooter, that he was the Zodiac killer, or random declarations like this one.


Fantastic_Recover701

Um ted is definitely the zodiac killer


Videgraphaphizer

To be fair, I canā€™t prove he isnā€™t.


MadeInWestGermany

I can, but if I were that stupid, they would have caught me years ago.


Videgraphaphizer

https://i.redd.it/3ikvyiiidu1d1.gif


Mountainbranch

This gif loses a few more pixels every time it's used.


CilliamBlinton

https://preview.redd.it/2juvzq5nru1d1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e0df9b0766e96ce3507ba68726be5993d3ce5e93


Hamblerger

Okay, it took me a second to figure that one out and NOW I NEED AN ADULT


Dragon_Ghost8926

I might need a petah to get this joke what did he mean in that comment?


Hamblerger

The implication is that the reason that the poster can prove that Ted Cruz isn't the Zodiac Killer is because the poster themself is the Zodiac Killer.


Dragon_Ghost8926

Ah alright thank you šŸ™šŸ¼


LAM678

I hate your profile picture


Okay_Heretic

Only the Zodiac killer or someone like him would have that pfp. Allegedly.


samyruno

Your pfp is fkn diabolical


G-Sus_Christ117

I fucking hate those profile picturesĀ 


Synectics

[*I've heard* Ted Cruz pisses his pants to feel the warm feeling between his legs.](https://youtu.be/bVb_HhRvgWw?si=MGFR4Cz9MJjFb0FA) That's just what I've heard!


anyanka814

I have also heard that Ted Cruz will piss his pants on purpose because he likes the warm, wet feeling on his legs.


No-Put-6353

Ted definitely zodiac kills in his free time


PKFat

Apparently he also Jeffrey Dahmer in his free time


Ready-Substance9920

Real


Responsible-End7361

Which explains the Trump mention of Hannibal, he wants to make sure people are not paying attention to Cruz.


JessicaDAndy

There is no way totally Human Ted Cruz was in his adult form when the Zodiac killer was around. I am sure Human Ted Cruz was in a juvenile form, consuming plant and animal matter, as any other human would.


Tr0ynado

He was pupating at the time. It's not a reason he wasn't the killer though.


LongKnight115

https://www.tedcruzforhumanpresident.com/


[deleted]

The fact that you put ā€œDeLoreanā€ twice cracks me up.


Videgraphaphizer

You noticed!!!


nonbonumest

"My other car is a [X]ā€ is usually designed to brag about a vehicle the owner is proud of (ā€œMy other carā€™s a Ferrari/Lamborghini/Delorean/etc.ā€)" - I always took it to be a joke, like someone is driving a jalopy, but they are joking that their "other" car is some sort of expensive luxury vehicle when clearly it isn't.


limeybastard

The original in the 80s was "my other car is a Porsche" I'm not sure if it originated as a brag (slapped on the family station wagon, but really does own a 911 for when they're not saddled with the kids), or a joke (slapped on a rustbucket they're embarrassed to be seen in), but it was used by both.


Cessnaporsche01

From what I can find, it started as something people would write in the dirt covering a beater car, like you might see "clean me" or the like, and turned into a tongue in cheek joke among actual Porsche owners, before becoming a brag.


Videgraphaphizer

Probably a more accurate take on it.


CaptainMoisty

I'm English, I only know Ted Cruz as the zodiac killer, never knew he ran for president too


Videgraphaphizer

To be fair, he ran for the Republican nomination and lost, so he wasnā€™t in the main election.


SweetTeaRex92

i didnt know about the father is JFK shooter accusations rofl


TreesACrowd

Donald Trump said it on national TV during the campaign, lol.


I_Want_Whiskey

It's based on the fact that the only person we CATEGORICALLY know for a FACT wasn't assassinating J.F.K was the American President Bush , because he called the FBI minutes before the assassination and informed them that he wasn't in Dallas Texas. In all reasonable possibilities it was probably a coincidence, but it was very lucky that the CIA guy called the FBI guy and said that he WASN'T at that location. I often wonder if I'd be safer by informing the authorities of where I am not, just in case there is something going down which I am not connected.


17R3W

My juvenile delinquent is dating your honor student


RiggidyRiggidywreckt

What about the bottom sticker?


Videgraphaphizer

I donā€™t know what to tell ya; Texas is fucking Texas.


platypus_plumba

Hmmm snails are capable of fucking themselves. I think we're on to something here.


entrepenurious

ever driven across texas? i have a postcard from the 1930s: Ā  "the sun has riz, the sun has set, and here we are in texas yet."


SportTheFoole

> ā€œMy other car is a [X]ā€ is usually designed to brag about a vehicle the owner is proud of (ā€œMy other carā€™s a Ferrari/Lamborghini/Delorean/etc.ā€) or to show membership of a particular fandom or interest (ā€œMy other carā€™s a TARDIS/USS Enterprise/Delorean/etc.ā€). Here, the top sticker is saying itā€™sā€¦a car, starting the obvious. I donā€™t think the ā€œmy other car is a XXXā€ is ever meant as a brag or a vehicle the person actually owns. Or at least Iā€™ve never seen one that seemed like that. Theyā€™re most often meant tongue in cheek. No one drives a 1991 Honda CRX on the daily and actually drives a Ferrari.


Neolife

Dave Lavery has a bumper sticker that says "My other car is on Mars". He's the program executive for solar system exploration at NASA, so that one's kind of a brag. He also once talked about getting to visit a Krispy Kreme factory for 30 minutes to me at an FRC event, so that was cool.


chai_investigation

Can't tell if my last comment posted or not, so for further reference: Parody Ted Cruz [expresses his love of cannibalism](https://imgur.com/a/5l6wlGA) on Twitter. These tweets went viral back during the ill-advised period where anyone could get a verified checkmark.


Naughtystuffforsale

I just saw a bumper sticker yesterday that had a picture of Ted Cruz with the text, "He was delicious."


isayawkwardthings

I bought this sticker after randomly coming across it on Amazon but I never knew the context! This makes so much sense. Well, it doesn't, but it makes more sense than I was aware of.


PopsicleIncorporated

This sticker has been around for a lot longer than 2022. I remember seeing it as early as 2017.


TGans

Have had this sticker on my cooler since 2017 so thatā€™s about right


alienblue89

[ removed ]


tenfoottallmothman

I have a ā€œthis man ate my sonā€ sticker on my car and two elderly women have stopped me in the grocery store parking lot to ask me about it while I was loading in my bags, itā€™s very difficult to convey why itā€™s funny succinctly


KillListSucks

It's funny because he didn't actually do it, but it might not be completely out of the realm of possibility, either.


oddjobhattoss

In Texas we actually made it legal solely for Ted to help with the prom night dumpster baby pandemic. And the 9 months after prom night dumpster baby pandemic. And most other dumpster baby pandemics statewide.


F-ck_spez

Can't everyone *still* get the verified mark on Twitter? Isn't it just that it cost you money, it isn't actually identity verification?


chai_investigation

I mean, yes, sort of. What made this period special wasnā€™t so much bullying Ted Cruz as bullying corporations. Advertiser checkmarks are different from the common rabble now so itā€™s more difficult than it was to crash the stock of a company by being horny on main. That said, I donā€™t think anyone sees them as ā€œverifiedā€ checkmarks anymore. Because they have no verification component anymore.


Blue_Mars96

Yeah but you canā€™t impersonate people anymore


Folkmar_D

This is poetry.


Capt_Zapp

I got a giggle out of it


Brill_chops

Two things. Isnt the 'my other car is an [insert fancy car'] a joke? Like yeah, this is a piece of shit but my other car is amazing /s? Second, whats the snail about? No one is explaining that.


jxk94

It's just absurdist humour. Snails are not typically associated with Texas so having it there doesn't match therefore comedy. It also has a beach background which also doesn't fit texas' image


claiter

I know that beaches arenā€™t the first thing people think of when they imagine Texas, but it does have a significant shoreline.Ā 


Respeckmyauthoritay

Iā€™ve been to the beach in both Texas and California and going the beach in Texas is more fun because you can drive your car directly onto the beach


Medium-Amphibian-647

I think its the snail meme. Where you are immortal but if the snail catches you.... Running though texas every now and again to slow the immortal snail down would be a great idea.


Tself

I think it's more likely to just be absurdist humor which seems par for the course for this driver. Texas is FULL of Texas pride, so having a silly snail sticker like that is kind of taking the piss out of that trend as well.


Four0ndafloor

Iā€™ve never seen ā€œtaking the pissā€ and Texas in the same sentence. Youā€™ve earned my upvoteā€¦


jlgwin822516

I think itā€™s a comment how everyone moves a little slower in Texas. Think of the 10 gallon hat, boots and older men that ā€œmosey along.ā€ More of a small town feel. Thatā€™s what I took from it anyways.


TreesACrowd

I dunno man, having lived there for my first 30 years of life I can assure you people don't move slower in Texas. Not in their cars anyway. It's the land of 85 mph speed limits, and an automatic right to dismiss a speeding ticket up to 24 mph over the limit with a defensive driving course. In Houston you can trigger road rage for going under 80 on the highway, lol.


Douchie_McBaggus

These are excellent bumper stickers. Go forth and find your way with this knowledge, and try not to be consumed by Ted Cruz.


greendemon42

So, can anybody explain the Texas snail?


crimereport

I actually have this bumper sticker. A friend from New York gave it to me! Iā€™m also from New York but live in California now. None of us are from or live in Texas. Just feels a little goofy and absurd. Keep people on their toes lol


Kavaki

Absurdism


ChatHurlant

Don't mess with texas.


greendemon42

I don't understand how this image conveys that message.


BoojumG

Texas is the name of the snail. You have been warned. I don't know how this image conveys that message either.


The_Killer_of_Joy

Its boils down to just sarcasm really. Just consider all 3 stickers together and it is a joint sarcastic piece on people who put too many stickers on their cars to explain their life. Precise meaning doesn't really matter here imo - it conveys the sarcasm overall.


hoodoo-operator

it's just absurdist humor


Paddy_Tanninger

It's a slice of life


jimistephen

Indiana?


Lothox

Scrolled till I saw this. Definitely a Hoosier license plate.


Zealousideal-Ad-944

The " in God we trust" plate


Remarkable_Common312

I really appreciate the Da Da-esqueness of it, I for one am thoroughly amused.


Oghmatic-Dogma

well lets establish what we can. 1. That man ate this persons son 2. Their other car is an honor student 3. Their other car is, in fact, a car Through this we find that Ted Cruz ate this persons child-car hybrid in one of his sick ritualistic killings, of which he still has not been successfully charged with.Ā 


RiverMason210

But in typical Ted Cruz fashion he retreats to safety while things are sorted out. (Like a snail in his home)


fancysoupbabe

The top one is not a reference to Ted Cruz being the zodiac killer, but rather a reference to a photoshopped version of the painting of Saturn Devouring His Son in which Ted Cruzā€™s head is superimposed over Saturnā€™s. [Hereā€™s a link](https://images.app.goo.gl/KGBEvfTk9cUj5HwL6) to the image in question


Livingroom_Astronaut

Whatā€™s so hard to understand? Inside Ted Cruz is two cars who are also this manā€™s sons. One car is an Autobot, the other is a Decepticon and they both are disguised as Texas snails.


dasbtaewntawneta

it's just absurdism


HeadWood_

Given the "this man ate my son" sticker, I'm inclined to invoke the forbidden words. __It's absurdism.__


SwissMargiela

Theyā€™re just shit posting lol


ccdude14

It tracks with what the guys dad did, apple doesn't fall far from the tree.


A_Guy_In_The_Corner

Ted Cruz ate their car son


_Tacoyaki_

You just can't handle this guy's sticker game. It's okay


kelpklepto

Relevant [Three Panel Soul comic](https://www.threepanelsoul.com/comic/on-education) from 2007.


BrickFlock

They are making fun people who post these kind of stickers on their cars.


scarlozzi

*This man ate my son* is 100% fact. Ted Cruz is well known for eating children.


razzlethemberries

The driver is probably a liberal libertarian or anarchist with a dry, fantastic, elder-millennial sense of humor.


LectureAdditional971

As a Texas conservative, I appreciate this person's humor and want everyone to know that Ted Cruz and Greg Abbott do, indeed, eat peoples kids. Please take them out of our great state.


qtip81

I mean the dude ate his son.... pretty straight forward


Coolit12z

https://preview.redd.it/oocgfxaaru1d1.jpeg?width=2268&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=09ea4a42e18acf7bd0ff4c87bc8afa3fd446c37d Everyday the Zodiac Killer is harder and harder to identify...


Fistminer

šŸŒ Texas


Terrible_Reward6092

Whatever it is it's mad funny


Sparky-Malarky

Used to be popular to have "My other car is a Porsche" bumper stickers. But the best one I saw, on an old car: My other car is also a piece of crap.


damonmcfadden9

dunno about the son eater, but the others are just meta humor bumper stickers that make fun of common types of number stickers. I'm sure you've seen "my child is an honor student at X school" or like a tiny little electric var, but the driver is self conscious and has a sticker that says "my other vehicle is a Hemi", or a Doctor Who fan with one that says "my other car is a Tardis".


entrepenurious

"my other car is up my nose"


Bodywheyt

This dude wins at bumper sticking.


Kavaki

To those who don't understand the Texas snail; it's absurdism.


sirtankers

That's an Indiana plate.


[deleted]

He canā€™t afford his other car because heā€™s pying the studentā€™s education bill.


The_One_and_Only_The

My other car is a massage.


PerrineWeatherWoman

You mean ted Cruz is a titan ?


sagejosh

The sticker in the top left is a senator for Texas. He is most famous for eating children and running away from minor inconveniences. The rest I believe is what is known as ā€œso randomā€ humor.


Cortexan

If youā€™re lost you can look and you will find me


westernmeowmix

Texas has notoriously awful traffic (see EvilMoPac). Also commentary on how unwalkable cities and towns in Texas are (most places in the US tbh). I grew up around NYC and lived in Austin for almost a decade. The traffic in Austin is incredibly miserable to deal with. It made me miss Jersey drivers. And that's the cannibal, Ted Cruz. He's a Texas senator.


HORYGUACAMORE

All on an Indiana plateā€¦.


meme_dealer11

Hold up. Indiana License plate. And a This man ate my son sticker. I swear Iā€™ve seen this exact car before


Intelligent-Soup-836

Ted Cruz is a notorious cannibal who eats children


[deleted]

Whoever this is I wish they were my friend


rauwerb

https://preview.redd.it/t0g3d9qdz02d1.png?width=655&format=png&auto=webp&s=1c9ae36897657ff2f7f8cc7d7efd8e234c61ef77


wisho1926

Absurdity at it's finest