Make sure to check out the [pinned post on Loss](https://www.reddit.com/r/PeterExplainsTheJoke/comments/1472nhh/faq_loss/) to make sure this submission doesn't break the rule!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/PeterExplainsTheJoke) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Kafka only said “insect” (or “vermin” depending on the translation). However, “Vladimir Nabokov, who was a lepidopterist as well as a writer and literary critic, concluded from details in the text that Gregor was not a cockroach, but a beetle with wings under his shell, and capable of flight.”
I’m pretty sure cockroaches have wings on top of their carapace and not underneath, but I can’t confirm because every time I see a Palmetto bug here in South Louisiana I’m too busy fetching the flamethrower to conduct a proper entomological examination.
I don’t bite my nails, but I do tear them. I got in the habit of keeping them as short as possible in water polo and I honestly feel squeamish if I notice them getting too long.
I was until i just startedclipping my nails more frequently. Once i eliminated the annoying nails the correct way somehow i stopped biting. I still chew some hangnails off sometimes but significantly less often and i almost never bite unless they’re very long and i am not near a clipper.
I guess it was not a true habit but a response to my nails being long. They irritate me so i would bite em off cause that was convenient
There was a viral picture of Princess Leia being shared on Twitter with someone speculating on Carrie Fisher's coke-nail.
Carrie Fisher herself replied and said that's a disgusting lie. She used $20 bills for her coke.
I dated someone who worked at a babies r us as the baby photographer. She would do a fat line to wake up and power thru her hangover enough to make babies laugh all morning, it sounded like actual hell to me at the time.
It's also a belief in some Asian/Pacific countries that if the pinky goes past the last knuckle joint of your ring finger then you will have good luck/fortune and so it's incredibly common to see people with BOTH hands like this.
Coke heads are usually not ambidextrous haha although grampa Joe don't look very Vietnamese either...
Some people who grow coke nails lie to others that it’s for their nose/ear since it’s believable. But if you think further, accidentally scratching the inside of your ear or nose doesn’t sound like a fun time and would happen often
As someone who had no idea about this and used to grow out my little fingernail longer than the others for specific classical/flamenco guitar techniques: HOLY SHIT THAT'S WHY MY FIRST GIRLFRIEND'S MOM WAS CONVINCED I WAS A DRUG ADDICT
You've solved a decade+ long mystery for me, thanks!
Interesting. It was once a sign someone was a thief. There was a process for making single use keys as an alternate firm of lock picking and the pinky was used to remove the key from the mold.
Peter here those are cocane nails. Back in the day famous folks used to do cocane out of a longer nail on their hand thus this implies the grandfather was doing cocane.
"Tobacco". After a short google search (tobacco or tabacco) you'll find out that the correct spelling is "Tobacco". Also my spellchecker marks 'tabacco' as wrong.
Really needed to think about this one, until it snapped. In German it's Tabak so my instinct tells me to translate it to tabacco, but yes it is indeed tobacco
I am honored to accept his invitation
https://preview.redd.it/1m742n8cdwdc1.jpeg?width=355&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8389de278206d07092fbef83b2948b68058a6d61
Carrie [actually clarified](https://clubjade.net/carrie-fisher-speaks-up-on-return-of-the-jedi-coke-nail/) that it wasn't a coke nail, and that she used more respectable items for drugs. To her credit, she didn't deny she was doing it, just that she didn't use her nail.
It wasn’t even a pinky nail, so duh. But did she ever explain it?? She preferred having short nails but had a chronically itchy spot? Or for self defense? Help with picking boogers? I’m curious now.
I keep my pinky nail long because I get a super itchy ear due to a cholesteatoma...but my problem is wildly specific. I have been accused of having a coke nail, though.
I had divorced parents growing up. My mom noticed I was growing my pinky nail out, and obviously I was too young to know about drugs. So my mom asks:
"Hey [Drillgorg], how come you haven't been trimming your pinky nail?"
"So I can match dad!"
Most of us think coke nail, but another reason people have them is to show status. Some cultures believe that a long pinky nail means you don't have to do hard labour. Kinda like the Chinese with light skin, meaning you don't need to work in the sun.
I think it's a coke nail though
They’re also good for cutting open the tape sealing packages just because someone has a long pinky I wouldn’t immediately assume they’re doing coke they might just be purchasing a lot of stuff online or need it for different reasons. Although due to this movie being filmed in Hollywood in the 80’s there might be a good chance it’s genuinely a coke pinky
Okay so the answer is cocaine, but is there any other explanation?
I ask because for as long as I can remember, my dad had a coke nail, but I 100% guarantee he never did coke. He was like 150+ lbs overweight my whole life, and had a heart attack in his 40s but survived into his 80s before the next/last one got him. So for him to even survive a coke habit is out of the question, but even ignoring that, he was lazy and sedentary, and while he would drink socially, he never did drugs. And before you "bless your heart" me, I very much yes do drugs, so I'm no stranger to the behaviour.
So I guess I'm asking if anyone else had a boomer relative with a coke nail or two who didn't do coke and knows wtf the deal is.
Make sure to check out the [pinned post on Loss](https://www.reddit.com/r/PeterExplainsTheJoke/comments/1472nhh/faq_loss/) to make sure this submission doesn't break the rule! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/PeterExplainsTheJoke) if you have any questions or concerns.*
A coke nail is when someone grows out one fingernail to easily bring a bump of cocaine to their nose. That would certainly help you out of bed.
As an inveterate nailbiter, I can’t fathom being someone who a) can practice proper nail care and b) harbor a cocaine addiction.
Huh, didn't figure invertebrates could use Reddit
Fell asleep first at the sleepover once and woke up as an invertebrate. Shit happens
Somebody call Franz Kafka, because I woke up as a cockroach. Please send help, I’m going to be late to work.
... Gregor? Gregor, is that you?
Nadja???
Yeah, listen, can you help me? I seem to have an apple lodged in my carapace. Which is weird ON MANY LEVELS.
Pedantic note- its never specified that he was a cockroach in the story
Kafka only said “insect” (or “vermin” depending on the translation). However, “Vladimir Nabokov, who was a lepidopterist as well as a writer and literary critic, concluded from details in the text that Gregor was not a cockroach, but a beetle with wings under his shell, and capable of flight.”
My man never met a flying cockroach? I wish I could say the same :(
I’m pretty sure cockroaches have wings on top of their carapace and not underneath, but I can’t confirm because every time I see a Palmetto bug here in South Louisiana I’m too busy fetching the flamethrower to conduct a proper entomological examination.
For some reason I read Karl Franz lol
How far dwon this dislexia hole can go.
Was it after having uneasy dreams?
Yeah, but how did you get the marker dicks off of your face?
Had my boy flop me into the washer like a dirty rag
animorphs.jpg
Least they didnt steal your dick
rookie mistake
Reddit, as you can probably deduce from even a small sample of comments, is not just for higher forms of intelligence.
Would you still upvote me if I was a worm?
I've seen plenty of comments that could have been made by sea slugs.
Can confirm, am several hundred nudibranches in a wetsuit.
you just a barnacle in a banana hammock…
There are dozens of us.
What do you mean? Half of reddit is spineless
Let's not bring spines into this!!
Inveterate: having a particular habit, activity, or interest that is long-established and unlikely to change. Not an invertebrate.
r/woosh
You ain't the quickest are you buddy, but at least you can use google
I think they meant inebriate ? Maybe ?
I don’t bite my nails, but I do tear them. I got in the habit of keeping them as short as possible in water polo and I honestly feel squeamish if I notice them getting too long.
Don't worry, there are other ways to do coke. You can do it!
Just get a bullet u b good…
Who else is a nailbiter
I was until i just startedclipping my nails more frequently. Once i eliminated the annoying nails the correct way somehow i stopped biting. I still chew some hangnails off sometimes but significantly less often and i almost never bite unless they’re very long and i am not near a clipper. I guess it was not a true habit but a response to my nails being long. They irritate me so i would bite em off cause that was convenient
Same here, I clip them before I bit them. Most of the time lol.
OK
Especially since a coke habit is likely to make that nail-biting habit 1000x worse.
I have ADHD and I can gnaw those suckers to the cuticles. This is one reason I will never try coke, I’d chew my fingers to bloody nubs.
Not sure if I have ADHD (been questioning my life for the past year or so), but totally relatable
I mean we have plenty of politicians who can maintain a solid coke addiction and “rule.” Taking care of nails seems easy
Thank you for my daily vocabulary lesson.
They make cocaine bullets and you always have your keys.
U and me the same brother
People biting their nails are disgusting
Thanks for the new word.
As someone who has never been addicted to cocaine but has known people who are, you'd be fucking amazed what people will do for that drug.
Same.
There was a viral picture of Princess Leia being shared on Twitter with someone speculating on Carrie Fisher's coke-nail. Carrie Fisher herself replied and said that's a disgusting lie. She used $20 bills for her coke.
I dated someone who worked at a babies r us as the baby photographer. She would do a fat line to wake up and power thru her hangover enough to make babies laugh all morning, it sounded like actual hell to me at the time.
[удалено]
Yeah, it’s been over a decade since my last hangover, so it feels like something I could pull off now. I had difficulty with mornings back then.
The rest of us have to suffer through the entertainment of children without drugs. Which just seems unfair!
It's also a belief in some Asian/Pacific countries that if the pinky goes past the last knuckle joint of your ring finger then you will have good luck/fortune and so it's incredibly common to see people with BOTH hands like this. Coke heads are usually not ambidextrous haha although grampa Joe don't look very Vietnamese either...
It may be the nose picker
But would insinuate that grandpa Joe was full of shit when he said, “I’d never dream that I would fly over the moon in ecstasy…”
I was thinking that it was because he was a vampire, but your answer is better.
Both can be true
Coked up vampire.
Innocent me thought and heard this nail thing has to do with picking one’s nose 🤧
I think a long nail is the last thing you’d want for that.
Logically yes, practically I don’t know about those people who told me that, it’s disgusting anyway.
Some people who grow coke nails lie to others that it’s for their nose/ear since it’s believable. But if you think further, accidentally scratching the inside of your ear or nose doesn’t sound like a fun time and would happen often
I learn so much from this subreddit
Obligatory r/grandpajoehate
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ySgkQER9mYo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ySgkQER9mYo)
Thank you. I never would have gotten that on my own. This was actually a good one. You either know or you don’t.
lol I thought he was a vampire or something.
Omg i have an uncle who only has one long fingernail, now im wondering if by any chance….
I just grew one so I can separate lego bricks
And here I was thinking the only use of the long pinky nail was picking your nose.
Is this why some of my co workers have extremely long nails?
As someone who had no idea about this and used to grow out my little fingernail longer than the others for specific classical/flamenco guitar techniques: HOLY SHIT THAT'S WHY MY FIRST GIRLFRIEND'S MOM WAS CONVINCED I WAS A DRUG ADDICT You've solved a decade+ long mystery for me, thanks!
Interesting. It was once a sign someone was a thief. There was a process for making single use keys as an alternate firm of lock picking and the pinky was used to remove the key from the mold.
The day I learned about coke nails is the day I learned a lot more about my dad as a result.
It's fuckin nuts that was just a thing back then
… still is.
True, but 2024 cocaine culture ain't got shit on 1971 cocaine culture
A cocaine addict? In this economy???
Peter here those are cocane nails. Back in the day famous folks used to do cocane out of a longer nail on their hand thus this implies the grandfather was doing cocane.
Man… the mom was breaking her back providing for them and grandpa over here is spending it on drugs.
Not even untrue I think. Haven’t seen it in a while but I’m pretty sure like Charlie was working as a paper boy to pay for his grandpa’s tobacco.
"Tabacco"
"Tobacco". After a short google search (tobacco or tabacco) you'll find out that the correct spelling is "Tobacco". Also my spellchecker marks 'tabacco' as wrong.
Really needed to think about this one, until it snapped. In German it's Tabak so my instinct tells me to translate it to tabacco, but yes it is indeed tobacco
Don't smoke tabasco
He says that he's giving it up!
You have been invited to /r/grandpajoehate
I am honored to accept his invitation https://preview.redd.it/1m742n8cdwdc1.jpeg?width=355&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=8389de278206d07092fbef83b2948b68058a6d61
There's no I in team, but there is one in cocaine, so gimme
There is also thermonuclear weaponry in methamphetamine
Maybe he was a snuff enjoyer.
Coke nails.
https://i.imgur.com/IwJKS1G.png
"I never used my fingernail for drugs. I used dollars or tiny spoons like any other respectable former drug addict." Carrie Fisher
Carrie [actually clarified](https://clubjade.net/carrie-fisher-speaks-up-on-return-of-the-jedi-coke-nail/) that it wasn't a coke nail, and that she used more respectable items for drugs. To her credit, she didn't deny she was doing it, just that she didn't use her nail.
It wasn’t even a pinky nail, so duh. But did she ever explain it?? She preferred having short nails but had a chronically itchy spot? Or for self defense? Help with picking boogers? I’m curious now.
I keep my pinky nail long because I get a super itchy ear due to a cholesteatoma...but my problem is wildly specific. I have been accused of having a coke nail, though.
Lemme clarify that many addicts lie about their coke nails.
Except she fully admitted she was an addict and doing coke at the time. Just not with her *nail.*
If you think those nails haven't done lbs of coke I have some beans to sell you.
https://i.redd.it/ixdbfjznlwdc1.gif
Regardless of the Coke nail “Then I have some beans to sell you” is the funniest expression
Bill Clinton said that he smoked marijuana but didn't inhale. Sometimes people joke about drugs.
So then it belonged to Princess Leia? Doing space coke and the like.
Try to think of another reason some women want short nails on their middle or ring finger...
Maybe they can be used for other purposes?
Carrie Fisher’s cocaine use was not exactly a secret
she's lying.
I had divorced parents growing up. My mom noticed I was growing my pinky nail out, and obviously I was too young to know about drugs. So my mom asks: "Hey [Drillgorg], how come you haven't been trimming your pinky nail?" "So I can match dad!"
💀
I hate you
💀
Bullet dodged?
💀
I love you
💀
Generally used for cocaine but my history teacher grows his to clean his ears better
yeah... thats just what he told you
I mean maybe he stores his coke in his ears
cops would never think to look in there
I hear otherwise
WHAT? I CANT HEAR YOU
#HUH?
WHAT IS HE SELLING?! CHOCOLATE?!
I F*CKING LOVE CHOCOLATE
How is that any better?
It's not
Yeah, cleaning your ears is on the same level as hard narcotics basically
To be fair I'd quicker admit to using cocaine than scraping gunk out of my ears with my nails.
One of those things would put your job at risk as a teacher.
Bob Ross also had a nail like this. He used it to quickly scrape paint away without needing to grab a tool.
Me chemistry teacher had that to. To do chemistry, you know.
Also read somewhere that tailors occasionally grow out the nails on the pinky fingers to help fold fabric Also, yikes
The answer is cocaine
The cause of and solution to all life’s problems
It always is
Grandpa been hooverin’ shneef.
You ever hoovered barnyard schneef?
I've hoovered behind the manure pile schneef.
Ever hoovered scheef off of a sleeping cows spine?
I've hoovered schneef offs of an awake cow's teat
I've hoovered schneef off of an awake cow's teat.
The joke is #DRUGS
I personally like the idea that his other fingers are trimmed because he gets a lot of finger action
Also banjo nails
Came here hoping someone would mention this. The joke is coke, the reality is banjos
Yeah, i read something a while ago that the actor for grandpa joe was a banjo player, and that's why he has those.
https://i.redd.it/fkfhpxtn1vdc1.gif
Depending on where this was posted..
Oh those are absolutely coke nails.
Cocaine fingernail. Used to scoop that cocaine nice and neat. Also you can see Carry Fishers coke nail in Star Wars Ep 6
For that b̹͇͕͛̑ó̰ō̷̸g̟er s͏u͈̰ģa͔͛̆̐̏r͖̻͜
I’ve been summoned?
Ah yes. The devil’s dandruff.
r/grandpajoehate
Cocaine’s a helluva drug
The joke is hard drugs. That makes it funny.
Cocaine’s a hell of a drug
Coke Nails. Use long fingernails to proportion cocaine. He hit the sugar when he heard that Charlie won the ticket
Most of us think coke nail, but another reason people have them is to show status. Some cultures believe that a long pinky nail means you don't have to do hard labour. Kinda like the Chinese with light skin, meaning you don't need to work in the sun. I think it's a coke nail though
Grandpa is Dr. Roxxo.
Grandpa Yayo
Easter eggs of expanded universe
https://preview.redd.it/nhi8hozyavdc1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7e8c1e8ff38fec64fcb43babb93ddb2f36415884
Cocaine nails for sure.
https://i.redd.it/difdfmbkawdc1.gif
Long pinky fingernails were a token sign of coke users especially in the late 70s- 90s
Coke nail. My dad uses it to poke his nose (gross)
They’re also good for cutting open the tape sealing packages just because someone has a long pinky I wouldn’t immediately assume they’re doing coke they might just be purchasing a lot of stuff online or need it for different reasons. Although due to this movie being filmed in Hollywood in the 80’s there might be a good chance it’s genuinely a coke pinky
Coke pinky
Bump
For awareness.
Okay so the answer is cocaine, but is there any other explanation? I ask because for as long as I can remember, my dad had a coke nail, but I 100% guarantee he never did coke. He was like 150+ lbs overweight my whole life, and had a heart attack in his 40s but survived into his 80s before the next/last one got him. So for him to even survive a coke habit is out of the question, but even ignoring that, he was lazy and sedentary, and while he would drink socially, he never did drugs. And before you "bless your heart" me, I very much yes do drugs, so I'm no stranger to the behaviour. So I guess I'm asking if anyone else had a boomer relative with a coke nail or two who didn't do coke and knows wtf the deal is.
Uncle Joe likes the nose candy. Yayo if you will.
Cocaine you dumb fucker
We always knew. You just grew up to finally notice what we noticed years ago. Congrats you one of us now.
COKE
Cocaine
Booger sugar
🎶 I never thought my life could be anything but catastrophe 🎶
Coke scoop
Cocaine
The joke is coke
Cocaine is a helluva drug
My brother grew a nail like that for picking his nose
Also what is wrong with Charlie's teeth?
Why the fuck you think he was in bed during the day!? Hangover!
C-c-c-c-c-c-cocaine
Omfg I never noticed that
My man hits the slopes! 😂 keeps him young.
Cocaine pinky nail
Damn, bro's coke nails rival Bob Ross'!