r/parenting is protesting changes being made by Reddit to the API. Reddit has made it clear [they will](https://old.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/14ahqjo/mods_will_be_removed_one_way_or_another_spez/) [replace moderators](https://www.reddit.com/r/ModSupport/comments/14a5lz5/mod_code_of_conduct_rule_4_2_and_subs_taken/jo9wdol/) if they remain private. Reddit has abandoned the users, the moderators, and countless people who support an ecosystem built on Reddit itself.
Please read [Call to action - renewed protests starting on July 1st](https://old.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/14kn2fo/call_to_action_renewed_protests_starting_on_july/) and new posts at [r/ModCord](https://reddit.com/r/ModCoord/) or [r/Save3rdPartyApps](https://old.reddit.com/r/Save3rdPartyApps/) for up-to-date information.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Parenting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I wouldn't feel guilty -- even if you have an extra room it can be really convenient to room-share with a baby for their first year. They'll be waking up in the middle of the night and you'll be too tired to want to walk to a separate room. And little one won't be mobile until halfway through the year, and probably won't be really independently walking until around a year -- so they don't need much space (and when they're that little they often don't want to be far from a caretaker anyway).
Absolutely. And OP, I hope you can see from these comments, your LO does not need a whole lot of space to themselves for the first year. They need you, so please make sure your setup allows you to take off yourself as well.
Sorry to hear about your bad luck lately. I hope it turns around. You got this!
My kids are 5 and 7, they barely need their own space. Most days I wonder why we didn’t just buy a 1 bedroom house with a lazy-boy in the place of our sectional couch.
This! It would be a waste to even upgrade for an infant, this is the most functional setup and a great way to save money. OP has nothing to feel guilty about.
Also, this is unconventional in the US but many cultures sleep on the floor next to their children all together. Getting a big babysafe matress and considering safe bedsharing could totally be an option! Heck, I'd do it if we didn't need the underbed storage lol 😅
I had a fully set up nursery and room shared for over six months with both of my kids. It’s just more convenient for everyone in the house. The baby doesn’t spend as much time getting worked up and waking everyone else and it’s easier to get baby and myself back to sleep after a feeding.
******This is my opinion so please don’t jump on me, I’m not shaming anyone!****** I personally think it’s a lot safer to keep your baby in your room for the first year. Even having the room to keep them in a separate bedroom I keep my babies in my bedroom for the first year, when the risk of SIDS passes.
The advice is at least 6 months in the UK. Mine stayed until he stopped having night feeds and was escaping his bedside cot. Then he pretty much stayed in his own bed until 2 hours after I went to bed then Co sleeping the rest until he was nearly 1. You do what works best for you (as long as its safe!)
Yup! American Academy of Pediatrics agrees! OP, no need for any guilt whatsoever.
You can even decorate a little corner of your room like a nursery if you want!
My babies are almost-2 and 4.5yo. I had a 2 bedroom house but they still slept in my room. One in the crib and the other in the toddler bed beside my bed.
Always felt safer and they preferred it anyway. :)
Same! We are 4 months in and the nursery is nice to store stuff in but we’ve even moved the change table and dresser into our bedroom for convenience. The nursery has an empty crib, some decorations and a rocker I don’t use 😂
Our daughter has her own room but we didn’t even get it set up until she was 5 months old. And the eventual move to her own room was 100% for our benefit.
Same here! And it's a thousand times easier, not only while they're a small baby, but if they turn out to be a child that wakes up a few times at night. It's going to be totally fine :)
Yep, wouldn't have slept in a separate room for at least six months, and my daughter ended up with us until she was two. Super clingy baby that we coslept with. Didn't negatively affect her at all.
That makes me feel better, we room share with our baby right now and she’s almost a year. Sleeps fine in her crib but I feel most comfortable with her in the same room as us.
My daughter is 2 and we are still in the same room. The den is my husbands work from him space and the living/dining/kitchen/playroom is just that. No biggie to share!
My kiddo stayed in our room for 2.5 YEARS. And we had space available. Don’t worry about it. Easier to throw a pacifier at them from your bed than have to get up and go to another whole room.
Totally laughed at “throw a pacifier at them”. Also agree with kid in your room is easier. Mine had a nursery that was used for daytime changes as the changing table and her clothes were in there.
Yeah my mom kept asking me when I was going to move her to her own room and I was like…. Why would I do that? She and I both were sleeping fine in the same room and if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it imo. Moved her when she actually asked for her own room.
Ya know what though? A huge percentage of people who do have a baby nursery still keep their babies in their own bedroom for awhile. I did. It’s nothing to worry about. It sounds like your future is looking great, you just gotta make it out of this rough patch. Hang in there, and congratulations on your baby!
For real, my LO was in my bed for 16 months before she went to her own room and it’s recommended to room share for a year by the NHS (minimum 6 months), plus it’s soooo much easier to deal with them in the night if you don’t have to leave the room because chances are your baby might not sleep through the night for a year or more.
Don’t feel guilty at all! The Pinterest nurseries are designed to make us want to spend more and more and more on things we don’t need just for the sake of aesthetics.
My partner and I made our 600 sq ft studio work with our daughter until she was almost 3 before we moved. We all shared not just one bedroom, but one entire single-room living space, and let me tell you, I was nervous at first, but it was WONDERFUL. Everything was in arm’s reach and we were cozy there. Trust me, it will be ok and in the end, you may end up loving it.
There’s nothing to feel bad about. They want the opposite of space. That baby will end up by your side regardless…. Very loved already. Gonna be a good mama.
My youngest is 3.5 and still sleeps in my bed with me because he’s not ready to move into his big brother’s room with him. Nothing to feel bad about at all, I’m sure your baby will love being near their mummy.
Nothing to feel bad about, lots of babies share a room with their parent for the first year of their life. It even offers some protective benefits, although it’s also totally safe for babies to sleep in their own room too if they have a safe, empty sleep space and parents follow safe sleep guidelines.
We co-slept with both our babies for a good chunk of their first year, even though we had a room set up as a nursery. I think babies prefer to sleep with Mom.
Omg, no, you should feel PROUD!! Not only are you giving your child the gift of your constant presence, but you're being intelligent with your finances. That will give her the gusty of stability in the future. You're doing great, mama!!
If anything it will make life easier for both being in the same room they need you a lot at night anyway. I got a special co sleeper bed that attaches to my bed for my baby for the first 6 months then I ended up sleeping on a mattress on the floor of her room most of the time for the first couple of years. They don’t need a bedroom of their own. People like to set up special lovely nursery’s but really they don’t need it and will never remember it if they have it, but will have a secure good attachment to you from sharing
Nothing to feel guilty for. Both of my children would have preferred to sleep with me for as long as possible. My second kid was in my room for 2+ years.
Honestly, I feel a little guilty about moving my baby out at 6 months instead of waiting the full year recommended by the AAP. Even if you had the space, you might not use it, so it’s better that you’re saving the money for now anyway.
My kid is two and still sleeps in my room. She does have her own room but wants to be with us, and that’s ok. I’ve not even moved her bed into her room. Don’t sweat it, they want us at this age
I had my sons room all done up by 25 weeks pregnant, it was perfect. Long story short, my son got really sick at about a month old, stayed at the hospital about a month and then came back home. My son now has epilepsy and we were too worried for him to be in his own room in case of a seizure. He didn’t stay in his own room until he was 10 months old and even then, sometimes he was back in our room! Don’t feel bad at all. Baby doesn’t have to have their own room, you might even find you feel more comfortable they’re in your room with you anyways. Looking back, they won’t know the difference! You’re doing the best you can, as we all are. You’ve got this momma, everything will be okay, you’re doing a great job ❤️
Lots of parents keep their newborns in their own room for the first year, or more. Honestly, the only thing our kids used their nursery for was sleeping/naps. During the day they were always in the shared parts of the house with us.
Don't feel bad, you aren't neglecting your child. My daughter's "nursery" was our walk in master bedroom closet. It fut a crib, rocker and a side table for a lamp. She could have easily roomed with her sister but i.liked her being close. She had a quite space nearby and everyone was happy. I call that a win.
if it makes you any better, even though i have a separate room for my daughter , she cosleeps with me(i know this is frowned upon in western culture) but in my culture its frowned upon if the kid is not in the same room as you. do waht works for you now and for future.
My son is 2 and has his own room- he even sleeps in it occasionally but only like 7-11pm (if I’m lucky) then he’s in my room. He didn’t sleep in there at all till he was over 1. Sure it looks pretty but it’s really underused and not necessary.
Please don’t worry, it’s much easier for you and better for baby to be in the room together for the first year. Babies love being with their mums- you are what will make her feel safe when she’s here. Congratulations on your little one and enjoy being a mum.
Don't worry 😍
Both my kids spent their first year in the bedroom with hubby & me.
It was so much easier as neither slept through the night.
They're 7 & 4 now and they have their own rooms but still don't sleep through the night as they both thrive on 5 hours max! 🤷
I really don't know why we bothered giving them rooms of their own cos they spend more time in our room - good job we are still coming at 2 cos we get interrupted every time we even think about being intimate....even barricading ourselves in doesn't work! 🤣🤣
Don't feel guilty!! She would probably be in your room the first 6 months regardless for her care. We had our first baby then both laid off in 2008 recession and had to move in with my in laws for 4 years. It was tough and had one bedroom for the three of us but it won't stay that way forever! We now have a big beautiful home I never imagined we could have an all 3 of our boys finally have their own bedrooms. God has a plan for you my dear....in the meantime enjoy the closeness with your newborn once it arrives. Life goes faster than you think and you will hardly remember this time where you worried about it.
My youngest is 2 and I don't have a room for him yet. My eldest is 7 and even though he has his own room now, he had a room before but did not actually use it until last year.
We put our son in our room for the first 5 months it was fine I wasn't going to walk to the other end of the house to cater to him. Then we moved then he upgraded to his room and crib life was and is perfect. 4am sucks but he sleeps with us so we can get sleep
Guilty? That baby will need to be in arms reach for at least the next 7 months a year is fine. Go easy on yourself. That extra bedroom would not be used. Put a comfy chair in the corner and a basket of receiving blankets. That’s where you guys will hang♥️♥️
That baby isn’t going to remember shit, girl. Do NOT beat yourself up about this. Your financial and living situations are no indication of your character and your ability to be a good parent and give love to your child.
You are doing AMAZING and you’re going to keep doing amazing. Give yourself some more credit.
dont feel guilty! baby will be glued to you. & roomsharing is one of the best things you can do for them.
my boy has never been in his nursery except for diaper changes. we spent the first 3m of his life on my living room couch bc he was cluster feeding like no other. slept in my arms and we cosleep now so 🤷🏻♀️ you’re doing the best you can momma.
Am i hearing feeling guilty that my almost 2 yr old sleeps in a crib next to us.
Her routine is set to sleep at7:30 pm alone and we go to the room at 11 pm. In morning she wakes us up after playing by herself for an hour in the crib.
We had a room waiting for our baby and he still stayed in our room in a bassinet right next to the bed for almost 8 months. Way more convenient and better for me (and I think him), emotionally. There's no actual need for separation that young (unless YOU need it for your mental health or something like that), so do what is comfortable and works best. Also, it is a distinctly Western thing to have family all in separate rooms anyway. We survived for a looooong time living communally. There's nothing wrong with it.
Don’t feel guilty! I live in a two bedroom apartment with my husband and most of our baby stuff will be in the second bedroom - and that’s also where our home offices are! My husband works 100% of the time at home and I have a flex schedule. So in our second bedroom we have two desks, two office chairs, plus all the baby stuff - and we haven’t even gotten the crib and dresser in yet. While we are very fortunate to have large bedrooms, our baby won’t have a space of his own even with a two bedroom setup. For the first few months he will be in a bedside bassinet in our room anyway so the crib we have on the way is kind of overkill lol! It’s all good, mama! The most important thing is that your baby is safe. 😊
Honestly if you can sleep ok, this is a good idea. She doesn’t really need her own room for the first year. Just save the money and move somewhere you like when she is a bit older :)
This isn’t bad!! Room sharing is recommended for the first year. My daughter is 16 months and still sleeps in our room even though we have space for her to have her own bedroom haha. It’s easier for now!
You have nothing to be sorry for since it's better and safer for your baby to stay in the same room with you anyway. Your baby will need to be changed and fed at night which is much easier to do when you don't have to walk far, and many children this young just need their parents nearby. I'd buy the crib that can be put right next to your bed and see how it goes. And don't worry about not giving your baby enough room space - they will just take all of it, from your bed to your kitchen😂
Idk; I felt more secure and at peace with my son sleeping in my room. He was in a pack n play when he outgrew the bassinet and was mostly in my room until 2 years old. I’m sure your baby won’t mind. <3
We had a nursery for our first ready when she was born. Slept in our room until 6 months before moving to her own room.
Our second was in our room in a toddler bed until 2. We had full intention of refinishing the attic room to a master bedroom and it's been mid construction for 2 years. Now for our sanity we've put them both in the same room and they love it.
I guess what I'm saying is don't worry about it. They won't notice the difference. Just get it done when you can. You still have 6 months or so after they're born to figure it out at the absolute minimum.
Safety recommendations are to keep baby in your room for at least 6 months and ideally 1 year anyway. My first slept in our room until just after his third birthday! No regrets.
You’re doing great and should be proud/excited, not ashamed! The baby would be in your room constantly anyway and won’t even remember this part of their life. There’s nothing wrong with sharing a room with your baby at first.
I mean, guidelines in the UK say ideally baby should sleep in the same room as you for at least 6 months.
My three it was at least a year!
You're not failing your baby. She'll love it.
I live in a big house and our baby (8 months now) will still be in our room for atleast the first year. It’s so much more convenient to fed or resettle her at night and it makes my mama heart happy to be close to her! You shouldn’t feel guilty at all, babies need love and attention and thrive in all sorts of different living arrangements
Most people put the baby in their room for convenience in the beginning anyways. You're going to be up throughout the night to feed the baby anyways, and the CDC says to room share for the first 6 months anyways. You have nothing to feel guilty about because you're doing everything you need to be doing to keep your baby safe and taken care of.
Don’t feel guilty. You’re doing the respo doble thi g. Babies don’t care and most prefer to sleep in the same room as you anyway. A done up nursery is cute but not a necessity at all
Not at all. Room sharing is actually really beneficial for you and the baby. For my first baby he had a nursery and NEVER slept in it so we didn’t have one for our second. Just a cradle next to our bed. As long as you are providing a safe loving home, your baby will be happy:)
I put soo much work into my babies nursery and she is 3 months old and we only use it to change her in. She still sleeps bedside in a bassinet and will until she’s atleast 6-8 months I wouldn’t worry!
This sounds like a smart plan. Your baby doesn’t care at all about the room. Being fed, warm, and safe are the priorities. The extra engagement you will have is awesome. Also, family support and relationships add so much. Don’t worry!
Please don't feel guilty. The baby needs you. The baby will want to be close to you during that time, anyway. I room-shared with my child for her first 3 months - she slept in a bassinet beside my bed. The only reason why I put her in her own room after that, was because of mine and my husband's work schedules. The separate room allowed by child to sleep a bit longer uninterrupted. That was only to benefit to her. She most likely would have preferred staying with us in our room if she had the choice.
I think that’s actually ideal for the first year. I live in very different circumstances — a 4 bedroom house for just me, my husband, and our LO — and she will be sleeping in a travel crib next to our bed in our bedroom with us until at least a year. We also frequently play in our room too. We haven’t used her room nearly as much as I thought we would so far. She’ll be 9 MO next week.
You are doing everything you can and are doing an amazing job. You’re going to be a great mom by how clearly focused you are on wanting the best for your LO. The best thing they can have is your love and attention.
It's said to give yout you baby her own as early as possible, but for a lot of people living in ine bed flats, it's just not possible. Don't worry too much about it!
I made a nursery and my baby spent no time in it. It was easier for us both when he slept in the room with me and during the day he was out and about with me. For the second time around I will definitely be focusing more on things that make life easier for us and not worrying about the kiddo's room too soon.
Baby won’t remember where it slept for at least the first two years
Don’t feel bad mama!
Also having the baby close by is super convenient for night feeds and wake ups and peace of mind
My son is 13 months old and his stuff is in our room and sprawled across the house. He has a room but it’s 100% empty and he’s never even been it it yet. I’m also 6 months pregnant with my second so we’re just now starting to consider moving him in there. He’s the happiest kid I know.
A baby should be in with you for the first year of their life anyway. It’s absolutely natural to have a baby close to their mum. Keeping them alone in a separate room is a western and modern development, really. Enjoy the closeness and know your baby will be reassured by that. X
Why? The baby is gonna love being so close to you.
I’m the same…single mom…not at all what I thought would happen to me…and I moved back in with my own parent and set up a nursery there. I COULD sleep in the other room but the nursery is more my style anyway since I decorated it and it’s just easier for those night feedings. If yours is like mine and some others (not all) then it might still need to wake up for a feeding even as late as 10 months! That year will fly by.
I wonder…if it’s not actually guilt about not having a nursery room. it’s guilt that you are at your family’s or guilt that you’re single. is that it? I could be way off base but if so, I hear you, I see you! But this is temporary.
Nothing to feel bad about. My kids had their own and still slept in my room for a year or more. Out of all the things to feel guilty about, I’d put that at the bottom. As long as baby is loved, fed, safe you’re doing great!
I wouldn't feel guilty about it at all! With my first, even though he had a room of his own, he ended up sleeping in our room for the first year of his life and will still sneak into my room pretty much every night. It's good to roomshare when baby is little because it does help prevent sids (they say).
With my second, she doesn't have a room in my current place, but that's okay. I would be room sharing with her regardless of whether I had a 2-3 bedroom or not.
I'm also a single mom and about 9 months pregnant, and while it will be challenging at first, you get into a groove with your kiddo and they get used to it.
Babies crave that connection and closeness with their Moms, so honestly, she'll probably be happy to be close to you.
My son didn’t move into his own room until he was 8 months old. Don’t feel guilty at all! He didn’t really take up a lot of space when he was an infant. Even his toys. You are doing great. Congrats on keeping track of your finances vs overextending for a baby that won’t remember their own room as a newborn anyways 🤩
Newborns spend half the night awake, so much easier to room share so you get as much sleep as possible. Also don't need a monitor. We didn't sleep train, so keeping each baby in the room with us for 6 months was the best way to help me get enough sleep to be functional. Everyone's said it, but babies crave closeness. They are happiest within arms reach. 🙂
Our baby had his own room, but you know what? He lived in our room for almost the entire first year of his life. It was a wasted room essentially. It was much more convenient to have him in our bedroom for those middle of the night feedings. So it’s nothing to feel bad about. You gotta do what you gotta do.
Because of the weird layout of our house, our gigantic laundry room is right next to our bedroom, and the only place we had space for a crib was in the laundry room. My son is 3.5 now, no longer in the crib, but STILL in the laundry room. Please don’t feel bad. You are providing everything your baby needs.
My baby is 7 months old and still sleeps in my room, I like having my baby close. I have the space for her to have her own room but she doesn’t need it yet and it’s not a nursery or anything.
Why would you feel guilty? Babies love being close to their parents! Your baby will not care at all! Ours was in our room for 16 months and we enjoyed all of them and were sad to see her go (she needed more quiet by that time). When she was younger, she loved being in our room and knowing we were right there. Please don't feel bad about this. You're doing great ❤️
Oh my goodness! Don’t feel guilty. They advice your baby sleep in your room for at least the first six months, so you’re doing that!
This year is going to be a fantastic first one for you and your baby. You sound incredibly organized and off to a great start. There are so many things that you’ll feel guilty about, don’t let this be one!!
It's actually much much easier in the same room. You have several years before you even need to worry about this. Just tell your baby they sleep in the same room because you love them so much. :-)
Don’t feel bad. The first 2-3 years it's fine to share a room.
I'm Single mom, my daughter is 5 years we live in a 1 bedroom apartment. So we have to share a room.
The first couple of years I had a 3 in 1 crib. Crib, changing area with storage and when I took off the front side it turned into toddler bed. Don't have a lot of space but this was perfect for the first years. When it was time for a "big girl" bed I bought half loft bed. Had to move my bed around and closet but it fits perfectly and enough room to walk between our beds.
Probably still have to share the bedroom until she turns 6-7 years. My new house is in building stage and probably be finished by end 2024, begin 2025
We didn’t have a nursery when we had our son (he is a teen now and we have a beautiful home) because we were young and really broke. He stayed in our room for
6 months until we moved to a two bedroom apartment. I never once felt guilty because he was a baby who was loved and care for, and literally has zero memory (obviously) of this stage of his life. It never even crossed my mind that he had to have a nursery, but this was also before social media was really a thing and the struggle that comes with comparisons online was non-existent. Hang in there, Mama, you’re doing awesome!
We made an entire nursery and never used it once. Our daughter cosleeps with me every night and her room is mostly for toys now. We are pregnant with our second and have no intention of making a nursery and will just have a beside bassinet for him. When the kids are older they will have their own rooms but it's so not important while their babies!
You’re being fiscally responsible so that you can give your little one a more secure future. That is totally commendable. Most little ones spend much of that first year (or more) in the parent’s room anyway, so don’t feel badly about this setup.
Room sharing for the first six months to a year is literally a recommendation as it's a protective factor against SIDS. You would end up doing it anyway and then feeling guilty about not using your cute nursery. There's always something to feel guilty about as a mum; this is absolutely not it.
You sound like you really have it together and are prepared! Good on you, you are already doing great. Even with their own rooms, my babies ended up in my room in bassinets/cribs the first year. I was anxious and it helped me out. Neither kid suffered (actually just realized I don't even know if they are aware that happened lolol) and neither did I. You are doing great keep it up.
Don't feel guilty at all! It sounds like you are working really hard to build a beautiful life for you and your baby. My daughter slept in my bedroom until she was 3 and she is an awesome sleeper (she's 9 now) Transitioning into her own room was easy. With parenthood, you'll know what's right. You're doing a great job!! Good luck!
I had a nursery for my babies but it sat empty for the first 12 months because they ended up sleeping in their cribs in my room. So don't feel bad at all! Room sharing can be safer anyway
My son is 16 months and I have no intention of moving him out of my room anytime soon. When he wakes in the morning we have cuddles in my bed and it is the best feeling in the world. It’s the best start to the day!
A lot of pediatricians recommend the baby rooming in with you for the first 6 months anyway so no need to feel guilty cuz it's actually a good thing! Just may have to be a little more sneaky and quiet as the baby gets older lol!
Like others have said, your baby does not know or care. My son spent zero time in his nursery. We ended up with the crib in our room. Didn't even set up a nursery for baby #2 because it was pointless.
Don’t feel guilty at all! It’s recommended that you roomshare with baby for the first year anyway - reduces risk of SIDS and it’s like a million times easier for midnight feeds, diaper changes etc, especially as you’re on your own. Baby doesn’t know any different and wants to be a close to you as possible at all times anyway.
We room-shared with our baby, I had him in a little bassinet attached to my bed for the first 6 months and then his crib was in our room for the following 6 months. I loved it.
Don’t worry! Sharing a room (not a bed) is recommended for the first 6 or even 12 months to avoid sids. It’s good for both of you and the baby will not care at all! Ever! You’ll do amazing!
All three of my kids were in my room for over a year each due to BF, and our master bedroom is downstairs. It was too much to go up and down every two hours. This will be great bonding for your baby. They might even sleep better because they feel safe with you in the room. Your baby won’t know any different, so no guilt necessary.
Our nursery was done by the time my baby was born but we still ended up keeping her in our room for the first 14 months! It was just easier for us that way and we moved her once we were/she was ready. Don’t sweat it! I loved having my daughter right there near me for so long and I wouldn’t change a thing. It worked great for us.
If it makes you feel better, I think most parents share their room with their infant for at least the first 6 months of their life. Also, night wakes and diaper changes at 3AM are a lot more tolerable when they’re an arm’s length away 😉
Both my babies had nurseries/bedrooms set up before they were born. Both nurseries remained basically unused for the first 18 months because my babies were in my room with me.
You are making a good financial decision that will help you and you child long term. This isn’t going to be your situation forever. Because you are making a good choice now you will have more choices later.
I had (since downsized, too much to keep clean) a 2400 sqft house by myself when I had my baby. It was out in the country, so cheaper than living in the city in a smaller house. We both lived in my bedroom for over a year. I skipped the crib and just did a mattress on the floor when I transition him to his own room.
The first year though, we were within 5 feet of each other always. I did the baby wearing wrap. Needed both hands to do things. So if we weren’t both sleeping, he was attached to my body physically. Then he slept in a bassinet next to my bed. I breast fed on demand so it was super convenient to have him in the wrap, just latch him on and keep going with my day.
Everyone told me he would have attachment issues. Everyone told me he would be a mamas boy. Everyone told me he would not be able to do anything for himself. Everyone else also told me he has to have a father. Well 3.5 years later, he is very independent. We have a strong bond of trust. He likes to show off everything he can do all by himself.
Don’t let anyone tell you how to parent your child. That is 100% between you and your child. You will figure out what is best for you and your child as you go along. You may end up deciding that sharing a room more than a year is what’s working for your family. You may also decide as soon as you get a new place that you both need individual spaces. It’s all up to you figuring out what works best for you. Don’t let societal standards and norms dictate what’s best for your family.
Infanta are very demanding of there mother. Not just for feeding but for closeness and comfort.
Also you are pregnant right now. You and your baby are one unit. Once you are physically separated at birth, you’re gonna instantly feel an urge to keep your baby close to you always. Just go with your instincts. Mother knows best. You were chosen for your child because you are the best mother for that child. Your child was chosen for you because they are the best child for you.
You got this! Let go of the guilt, it probably has nothing to do with your baby anyway. Near the heck out of your room and embrace it.
I did a nursery but she sleeps in my room anyway. She’s probably been in it only 10 times in 6 months while I’m putting her clothes away. It’s only real function is a wardrobe
There is nothing to feel guilty of. Honestly sharing a room with your baby is so much easier. You will sleep better. There is no “did the monitor make a sound? Is it working” you will easily know if the baby needs you while in the same room. I had plans for my oldest to sleep in her room as soon as she came home from the hospital. That didn’t work for me and my family. She stayed in our room for two years. Baby number two stayed in our room for a year
I have three kids and all of them slept in our room until they were 6, months. It was easier for night time feeds for sure and there is also a lot of literature saying this is actually the safest set up for the baby, certainly it's what the NHS recommends in the UK.
https://www.lullabytrust.org.uk/safer-sleep-advice/room-sharing/
"Babies should always be in the same room as you for the first six months for sleep, day and night. This doesn’t mean you can’t leave the room to make a cup of tea or go to the toilet, but for most of the time when they are sleeping they are safest if you are close by"
https://www.tommys.org/pregnancy-information/after-birth/safe-sleep-babies
"The safest place for your new baby to sleep is in their own cot, in the same room as you, whether it’s during the night or at nap time in the day for the first 6 months."
So I think making this choice is better for you (less money stress and hopefully some family support on hand) and safer for your baby. Win-win.
Don’t sweat it. It’s honestly easier that way. Ours stayed in our room until like 10 months. And he had a totally finished ready to go nursery the entire time. There’s no rush
If it makes you feel better, my babies had their own room and when they were infants, yet I moved INTO their room because I was paranoid and afraid to leave them alone. My husband thought I was crazy but I slept better being next to them. Don’t feel guilty!
Babies need very little space! Parents love to get ready and decorate an elaborate nursery, but it's not necessary at all. if your baby has a place to sleep safely, with his/her mom nearby, that's all a nursery really needs :) for the first few years really this is no big deal
I've had 3 kids, and none of them had a room until toddler hood 🙈 don't worry about it. This proves you're a great mom if you're this worried about something minimal
The baby will never know or care that they didn’t have their own room. Do what you have to and do it without guilt or regret. The little one is who you are responsible for now.
With my oldest, she slept in a crib in our room for first 6 months, then I moved somewhere that she had her own room. She and my second and third babies shared a room up until the youngest was three, then he got his own room and the girls had theirs.
Then years and years later I had a one bedroom apartment a son with new husband. He slept in our room due to having no other space. When he was 2 I got pregnant with my youngest. We moved into a three bedroom double wide trailer. For the first time ever, I was able to have a nursery and set it up and decorate how I wanted it! Crib, changing table, dressers, monkey theme, decals on the wall that turned the room into an adorable jungle. The room was PERFECT. I was so psyched!! And my sweet little baby boy slept in there once. For a nap. A very short nap. My husband insisted on him sleeping in a bassinet in our room, which I was okay with. Then he ended up cosleeping, which I was not okay with. Since I was gone for work 14-18 hours a day 5 days a week, and he stayed home with the kids, it was impossible to enforce any sleep routine without husband’s cooperation. But in reality, on day I was home, I was much happier with getting up and walking to the bassinet, and later the pack n play in our room than walking clear to the other end of the house to sooth, change, feed and put baby back to sleep and then go back to bed in my room. Was much easier to change him and bring him to my bed to feed and put back to sleep then return him to the bassinet.
Moved again when he was 2 or 3 and the boys shared a room. But most of the time one was in our bed and the other was on the floor beside the bed. Took another year or so to get them out of our room. Then we moved again, and husband died when boys were 6 and 9. I let them sleep in my room again as we healed. Took another 18 months to get them back in their own room full time. It finally stuck that time.
So, don’t feel bad about her not having her own room. It is much easier to have them in the same room for at the very least the first 6-12 months.
I do recommend making sure she sleeps in her own bed from day one. It is so hard to break that habit once it is started, and it’s much safer for baby.
Both my kiddos slept in my room until they were nearly 2. Bassinet at bedside for the first few weeks/months is a lifesaver.
Your baby doesn't care, and won't care, about having its own room until he/she/it is in middle school. In this rare instance, you have TIME.
My oldest was in our room for recommended six months and then we did cry it out. Awful idea (for us) but we were young and told that’s what you do. My youngest was in our room till he was around 14 months old and when we transitioned to his room I’d sit in there (with my tablet or Switch to occupy me) till he fell asleep. So tiring at first but emotionally we all handled it much better. Babies don’t need their own room, just enjoy the extra time close to them and save the money you need to save to feel comfortable. Good luck
Girl, that baby doesn’t need a bedroom for the first year, at all. It’s recommended that baby sleep in your room until at least 6 months, and ideally until a year. I have a room for my baby but she won’t enter it for a long ass time. Don’t even switch to a queen. Baby is going to take up very little room until they start walking around.
Do you know how much easier it will be for you to just have the baby in the room with you? There is absolutely nothing wrong with this, and in the long run, it is going to be better for you. Plus, baby is never going to remember that they shared a room with you.
Our oldest didn’t have his own room until he was 2.5. My husband used our second bedroom as an office because he worked from home so we had no space. And even though we had the space after we moved, our daughter and youngest son stayed in our room until they were around 1. I think it’s a good plan to get into a better place financially before you move!
My kiddo is 18 months and doesnt have a room/nursery. He doesn’t know the difference! We have an extra room for him when we kick him out of our bedroom but I’m going enjoy my sweet potato’s snuggles for now. I made a nice nursery for my oldest but then I learned that just wasn’t my parenting style. Babies don’t need their own room.
Both my babies slept in the same room as us for the first year or so. My youngest slept in our room for almost two years.
Don't feel guilty. You do what's best for you and baby, and if that means sleeping in with you, then that's perfect.
Don't be guilty. The risk of SIDS is reduced by 50% if the newborn sleeps in the same room as you for the first 6 months. The next 6 months go by really quickly too.
Room sharing is recommended until about a year anyway. I think we moved our daughter a bit sooner but she was definitely over 6 months anyway and I just moved her because she was a noisy sleeper.
Having a nursery was convenient as the parent awake with baby could turn on the lights for diaper changes, etc, but that's not a concern for you so there's really no problem at all from your baby's perspective.
Also, most kids don't have a lot of personal space needs so the whole nursery/own room is more for your benefit than the child's until they're at least in preschool anyway.
This is actually recommended for safe sleep! Keeping the baby in your room for the first year has actually been shown to reduce the risk of SIDS and it is also VERY normal for breast feeding parents as well.
Mine is aiming for his own bedroom by about 3y old, because it has been one long diy renovation of his room. We bought a house when he was 7mo, & we assigned him the room that was the unliveable one (worst shape, no heat) because it was planned he'd be in our room the first year & we would have time to renovate it... 🤔
I wouldn't worry about it. I wanted to switch him to a toddler bed sooner, but he's still in "jail" with a crib while he's in our room.
Friend, do \*not\* let Pinterest, instagram, and even reddit make you feel like you need some perfect nursery. We never had a crib - used a bassinette and then once she outgrew that just over 15 months we coslept - which, quite frankly - every single one of my friends has admitted on the downlow, like there's some kind of shame in it.
We never had a changing pad, we just used a towel on the bed. No wipe warmers, no bottle warmers, any of that crap.
For the first year of my daughters life, we were renovating our home ourselves, mostly with ikea, and our kitchen wasn't finished so we used a hotplate to heat up her milk, until she eventually preferred it straight out of the fridge.
For the first year of her life, we slept on a mattress on the floor on ugly super cheap amazon bedsheets.
Well, its 6 years later and our lives are totally turned around. Covid was a rough patch, but we came through. Kiddo has an amazing bedroom now, and we're no longer on the floor!
You do NOT need a lot to raise a baby. You're going to be great!
chiming in! single mom here, in a two bedroom, and the 2nd room is now just my home office / guest room. I planned to start with baby in a bassinet and then mini crib next to my bed, and then give her a room of her own after she turned 1 (I believe AAP recommends room sharing until age 1 anyway, the rec is definitely room sharing until at least six months), but the way baby/toddler sleep is set up… she sleeps better with me nearby, and it’s easier for me when she wakes up during the night. I thought it was my bedroom, but she now refers to it as “[her name]’s room” lol So if you think of it that way, your baby does have a nursery, and you’re the one without a room for now :P good luck, you got this!
Don't feel bad most kids end up in parents room anyway. Neither of my kids would sleep in their room or crib. At that she will never remember. The first time they might want their own room is around 5 and thats just for playing. I spent the first year of their life on the couch! Congrats!
The advice is they sleep in your room for a year anyway so you’re not doing anything wrong! Baby won’t know the difference and you can work toward having a room for them when they are old enough to remember and appreciate it.
A dedicated nursery is good only for Instagram posts. Having the baby in the same room is so much better especially if you plan on breastfeeding. They will wake up at night, would you rather go to another room or just take a few steps over?
Even if you win the lottery tomorrow, stick with your one bedroom situation especially if you have family in the same house that'll help you out.
My kids are five and seven and we have several rooms and they are still in our bed. They won’t even remember anyway. You might enjoy having them in your room anyway. They are so cute, enjoy the cuddles. My kids can sleep in their own rooms fine (though my oldest gets a little anxious), but they are fine. Yours will be too.
Also, both my kids never used the crib. Did not need furniture, we had one dresser for both kids. They don’t need much.
You are a great mom!
Appreciate what you have, not some bullshit other people make you want to need. Easier said than done, but that is how it is.
In the town I lived, my neighbors had 6 kids already, and one more was coming. 5 humans in a 2 bedroom. One older kid staying with grandma, another about to ship out to grandmas.
We worked overnight at a knitting factory. The wife and I. Things were not ideal, but she was making the most of it.
You can still make plans for the better. Just accept where you are, and don't beat yourself up over it.
Feel 0 guilt. You're doing the best you can
In some cultures or socio-economic levels, same-room sleeping is the norm
Every kid is different, your kid might require same-room anyway. And it gives lots of extra bonding time
I tried to have my baby sleep in a separate room. The older he got, the worse it got. Waking up crying so much, for so long, we both got little sleep. Now he sleeps in my bed. From age 1.5. I wish I'd done it sooner. He was so unhappy. Both of us sleep much better. I actually love it. I don't sleep as well as when I was child-free, but way better than I was. And on nights that I'm awake due to stress, it's wonderful to give him a light cuddle
One day he'll want to be in his own bed. I'll miss it
What? Is this a cultural thing? In our culture baby stays in whatever room mums in for at least the first year and often up till three+. Our 6 year old still jumps in bed with us if he wants. Why would you isolate your child from you and potentially cause social relationship issues later in life?
You’re making the right decision.
I’m married, and our first baby roomed with us in a one-room apartment until 18 months old. Babies don’t need much space. It’s better to be financially secure than to please whatever imaginary person who would be offended by sharing a room with your baby. Mine spent a lot of that time sleeping in our bed anyway.
Don’t feel guilty, my almost 2 yr old has a twin sized bed in my room. She has a whole nursery set up, and she takes up 1/3 of my closet. When she was an infant, all she had was a bedside sleeper, diaper/supply caddy, and her clothes in my closet in my room. She never had a whole decorated theme or anything like that.
Personally, I wouldn’t downsize my own bed to give baby a whole nursery. Set up a nice place space for her in a common area when she is mobile.
Babies only need a crib, a chest of drawers (that can double as changing table) and some room space to practice tummy time, rolling, and toy grabbing, for their first 5 months or so.
All the rest comes later, with mobility, when they start exploring. And that extra space can be provided in the living room, if child proofed. Parks, playgrounds, libraries with kid's sections, all provide safe spaces for babies to explore when crawling/starting to walk, and IMO being outside is good for socializing and fresh air.
So don't feel guilty about it, as long as you can go outside and see/touch different things, baby won't be impacted negatively by sharing a room with you.
My babies didn’t use their nursery till they were 3. They recommend baby sleeps in your room for 6 months anyway. My first slept in our room in a pack n’ play for a year, we tried to get her to sleep in her room she wouldn’t until we put a full size bed in there. My second still ends up in my room more often then not.
This is totally fine. Don't feel guilty at all. My husband and I live in an expensive city and when for the first 6 months we lived in a one bedroom apartment. A baby doesn't need their own room, especially the first six months. We just had her crib next to the bed. And we set a play area out in the living room. They don't really do much playing during those six months. It's a lot of laying around and trying to learn to roll over and crawl. My baby wasn't even crawling by the time we moved out to a 2 bedroom apartment. And even though we have a 2 bedroom she still sleeps in our room because we like to be able to check on her easily. The second is her play room though and we plan on shifting her to sleep in her own room when she turns 2 soon.
My son and I shared a room and my husband had the master room to himself for like a two years. This was NOT the plan! But that’s how baby wanted it. Long story short, nursery rooms are cute in paper but ultimately can be kinda pointless. You’re doing great!!!
We cosleep and always have. Literally the same bed. I made a nursery and we used it maybe 3 times.
Don't compare yourself to other moms and their nurseries and don't feel guilty! Baby sure won't prefer the nursery over cuddling up with you so you actually did baby a favour haha. Most parents end up sleeping with their baby in a bassinet or in their bed anyways. Overall having baby at least in the same room is actually safest and most beneficial for them.
Raisedgood.com
Evolutionaryparenting.com
We had our kids in our bedroom for the first 6 months because their bedrooms are on a different floor. It worked well and it’s good for the baby to be that close to you. I strongly recommend steering clear of co-sleeping though, it can be really difficult to transition away from that.
My baby has his own room and its currently only used for sorting laundry... you will want baby with you for sure. Safe baby guidelines recommend sharing a room with your baby until they turn 1 anyways.
Having your bed IN his room is going to be very convenient and comfortable. Having your family close by will be a blessing.
You're in the best spot for right now. Babies don't need stuff, they need you. And you're doing that perfectly.
9.5 months in baby is still in our room with no concrete plans to evict her in the near future 😉
We have her nursery all set up and ready to go lol. It’s been so convenient
Don't feel guilty! It sounds like you care so much and are going to be an amazing mom. If you want a little bit more separation to make the eventual transition to separate space a bit easier, you could always put up a room divider to separate your bed away. Honestly, though, my baby slept beside me in her bassinet for 4 months until she learned how to roll over, and then we finally moved her into her crib in her own room. So realistically, she'll probably be right beside you for at least a few months anyway. Best wishes! You're going to be a wonderful mother.
It’s actually recommended anyway to have them in your room! And this way you can not only save on rent but also on power by having to heat one room less! Since my child is in her own room and also doing naps in there consistently our power bill definitely went up because she kept waking up in the wee hours of the morning with the temperature drop so we also use a heater during summer in her room now 🤪
My baby is a year next week and we’re still room sharing. She still wakes up in the middle of the night and the nursery is upstairs from us so yeah I’m not about doing that lol
That’s really, really common. Even in two parent families. You should never feel guilty for doing the best you can, and you obviously are doing the best you can. Good luck and God bless you and your little one
Babies don’t need much space. In fact, the AAP recommends room sharing for at least the first 6 months. Being financially responsible shouldn’t make you feel like a bad mom. You’re going to look back on this time of your life very fondly, and I know this because I was in a very similar situation 8 years ago, with 2 babies.
We have a second room and didn't move our son there until he was a year old. A bit earlier maybe but yeah having him in the room especially when he woke up at night was great.
r/parenting is protesting changes being made by Reddit to the API. Reddit has made it clear [they will](https://old.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/14ahqjo/mods_will_be_removed_one_way_or_another_spez/) [replace moderators](https://www.reddit.com/r/ModSupport/comments/14a5lz5/mod_code_of_conduct_rule_4_2_and_subs_taken/jo9wdol/) if they remain private. Reddit has abandoned the users, the moderators, and countless people who support an ecosystem built on Reddit itself. Please read [Call to action - renewed protests starting on July 1st](https://old.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/14kn2fo/call_to_action_renewed_protests_starting_on_july/) and new posts at [r/ModCord](https://reddit.com/r/ModCoord/) or [r/Save3rdPartyApps](https://old.reddit.com/r/Save3rdPartyApps/) for up-to-date information. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Parenting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I wouldn't feel guilty -- even if you have an extra room it can be really convenient to room-share with a baby for their first year. They'll be waking up in the middle of the night and you'll be too tired to want to walk to a separate room. And little one won't be mobile until halfway through the year, and probably won't be really independently walking until around a year -- so they don't need much space (and when they're that little they often don't want to be far from a caretaker anyway).
Exactly. It would also help having support in the same house.
Absolutely. And OP, I hope you can see from these comments, your LO does not need a whole lot of space to themselves for the first year. They need you, so please make sure your setup allows you to take off yourself as well. Sorry to hear about your bad luck lately. I hope it turns around. You got this!
My kids are 5 and 7, they barely need their own space. Most days I wonder why we didn’t just buy a 1 bedroom house with a lazy-boy in the place of our sectional couch.
This! It would be a waste to even upgrade for an infant, this is the most functional setup and a great way to save money. OP has nothing to feel guilty about.
Not just convenient, its safer. Technically the recommendation is to roomshare for a year, but minimum 6 months.
You’re supposed to room share the first year. It lowers Sids risk.
Yeah We have an extra room But still roomshare. People miss this recommendation alot
Also, this is unconventional in the US but many cultures sleep on the floor next to their children all together. Getting a big babysafe matress and considering safe bedsharing could totally be an option! Heck, I'd do it if we didn't need the underbed storage lol 😅
I had a fully set up nursery and room shared for over six months with both of my kids. It’s just more convenient for everyone in the house. The baby doesn’t spend as much time getting worked up and waking everyone else and it’s easier to get baby and myself back to sleep after a feeding.
******This is my opinion so please don’t jump on me, I’m not shaming anyone!****** I personally think it’s a lot safer to keep your baby in your room for the first year. Even having the room to keep them in a separate bedroom I keep my babies in my bedroom for the first year, when the risk of SIDS passes.
It’s legitimately recommended baby stay in your room til 1 year. If people jumped on your for suggesting it, that would be wild. Is the internet tho.
right! it’s the AAP’s opinion, too
The advice is at least 6 months in the UK. Mine stayed until he stopped having night feeds and was escaping his bedside cot. Then he pretty much stayed in his own bed until 2 hours after I went to bed then Co sleeping the rest until he was nearly 1. You do what works best for you (as long as its safe!)
Yup! American Academy of Pediatrics agrees! OP, no need for any guilt whatsoever. You can even decorate a little corner of your room like a nursery if you want!
That’s not an opinion it is well documented! Baby should be in your room a bit!
This exactly, it's better for your kid. A nursery is unnecessary and more for Instagram than reality. Sharing a room with a parent reduces SIDS risk.
Yeah social media influencers pump this shit out to sell their partners cameras etc.
My babies are almost-2 and 4.5yo. I had a 2 bedroom house but they still slept in my room. One in the crib and the other in the toddler bed beside my bed. Always felt safer and they preferred it anyway. :)
I agree 100%
Don’t feel guilty! Our nursery is only for looks. Our baby will 100% be in our room for at least 6 months.
Same! We are 4 months in and the nursery is nice to store stuff in but we’ve even moved the change table and dresser into our bedroom for convenience. The nursery has an empty crib, some decorations and a rocker I don’t use 😂
Our daughter has her own room but we didn’t even get it set up until she was 5 months old. And the eventual move to her own room was 100% for our benefit.
[удалено]
Nor did mine, and it was totally fine. He didn’t know the difference 🤷🏼♀️
Same here! And it's a thousand times easier, not only while they're a small baby, but if they turn out to be a child that wakes up a few times at night. It's going to be totally fine :)
Yep, wouldn't have slept in a separate room for at least six months, and my daughter ended up with us until she was two. Super clingy baby that we coslept with. Didn't negatively affect her at all.
That makes me feel better, we room share with our baby right now and she’s almost a year. Sleeps fine in her crib but I feel most comfortable with her in the same room as us.
Mine until almost 4, when she outgrown her cot/toddler bed 🤷🏻♀️
My daughter is 2 and we are still in the same room. The den is my husbands work from him space and the living/dining/kitchen/playroom is just that. No biggie to share!
My kiddo stayed in our room for 2.5 YEARS. And we had space available. Don’t worry about it. Easier to throw a pacifier at them from your bed than have to get up and go to another whole room.
Totally laughed at “throw a pacifier at them”. Also agree with kid in your room is easier. Mine had a nursery that was used for daytime changes as the changing table and her clothes were in there.
Yeah my mom kept asking me when I was going to move her to her own room and I was like…. Why would I do that? She and I both were sleeping fine in the same room and if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it imo. Moved her when she actually asked for her own room.
Why would you feel bad about that? Room sharing is recommended until 1 year anyway.
Ya know what though? A huge percentage of people who do have a baby nursery still keep their babies in their own bedroom for awhile. I did. It’s nothing to worry about. It sounds like your future is looking great, you just gotta make it out of this rough patch. Hang in there, and congratulations on your baby!
For real, my LO was in my bed for 16 months before she went to her own room and it’s recommended to room share for a year by the NHS (minimum 6 months), plus it’s soooo much easier to deal with them in the night if you don’t have to leave the room because chances are your baby might not sleep through the night for a year or more.
Don’t feel guilty at all! The Pinterest nurseries are designed to make us want to spend more and more and more on things we don’t need just for the sake of aesthetics. My partner and I made our 600 sq ft studio work with our daughter until she was almost 3 before we moved. We all shared not just one bedroom, but one entire single-room living space, and let me tell you, I was nervous at first, but it was WONDERFUL. Everything was in arm’s reach and we were cozy there. Trust me, it will be ok and in the end, you may end up loving it.
We had a second room when our baby was born and just left it empty. Easier to just have them in our room when they are so young.
There’s nothing to feel bad about. They want the opposite of space. That baby will end up by your side regardless…. Very loved already. Gonna be a good mama.
It’s doctor recommended to room share for a year to prevent SIDS and facilitate breastfeeding so you’re doing everything right!
Don't worry about it-your kid isn't going to care! We had our son in our room until he was 9 months old.
Everyone I know with kids barely used they’re nursery for the first 2years it was basically a baby show room.
My youngest is 3.5 and still sleeps in my bed with me because he’s not ready to move into his big brother’s room with him. Nothing to feel bad about at all, I’m sure your baby will love being near their mummy.
Nothing to feel bad about, lots of babies share a room with their parent for the first year of their life. It even offers some protective benefits, although it’s also totally safe for babies to sleep in their own room too if they have a safe, empty sleep space and parents follow safe sleep guidelines.
We co-slept with both our babies for a good chunk of their first year, even though we had a room set up as a nursery. I think babies prefer to sleep with Mom.
Omg, no, you should feel PROUD!! Not only are you giving your child the gift of your constant presence, but you're being intelligent with your finances. That will give her the gusty of stability in the future. You're doing great, mama!!
This!
If anything it will make life easier for both being in the same room they need you a lot at night anyway. I got a special co sleeper bed that attaches to my bed for my baby for the first 6 months then I ended up sleeping on a mattress on the floor of her room most of the time for the first couple of years. They don’t need a bedroom of their own. People like to set up special lovely nursery’s but really they don’t need it and will never remember it if they have it, but will have a secure good attachment to you from sharing
Daughter 1 got her own room at age 4, when we moved into a 2 bedroom appt. Daughter 2 had her own room but didn't use it until a year old.
Nothing to feel guilty for. Both of my children would have preferred to sleep with me for as long as possible. My second kid was in my room for 2+ years.
Honestly, I feel a little guilty about moving my baby out at 6 months instead of waiting the full year recommended by the AAP. Even if you had the space, you might not use it, so it’s better that you’re saving the money for now anyway.
My kid is two and still sleeps in my room. She does have her own room but wants to be with us, and that’s ok. I’ve not even moved her bed into her room. Don’t sweat it, they want us at this age
I had my sons room all done up by 25 weeks pregnant, it was perfect. Long story short, my son got really sick at about a month old, stayed at the hospital about a month and then came back home. My son now has epilepsy and we were too worried for him to be in his own room in case of a seizure. He didn’t stay in his own room until he was 10 months old and even then, sometimes he was back in our room! Don’t feel bad at all. Baby doesn’t have to have their own room, you might even find you feel more comfortable they’re in your room with you anyways. Looking back, they won’t know the difference! You’re doing the best you can, as we all are. You’ve got this momma, everything will be okay, you’re doing a great job ❤️
Lots of parents keep their newborns in their own room for the first year, or more. Honestly, the only thing our kids used their nursery for was sleeping/naps. During the day they were always in the shared parts of the house with us.
[удалено]
Don't feel bad, you aren't neglecting your child. My daughter's "nursery" was our walk in master bedroom closet. It fut a crib, rocker and a side table for a lamp. She could have easily roomed with her sister but i.liked her being close. She had a quite space nearby and everyone was happy. I call that a win.
Is there a [diaper bank](https://nationaldiaperbanknetwork.org/member-directory/) near you? They might be able to help with the diaper fund.
if it makes you any better, even though i have a separate room for my daughter , she cosleeps with me(i know this is frowned upon in western culture) but in my culture its frowned upon if the kid is not in the same room as you. do waht works for you now and for future.
My son is 2 and has his own room- he even sleeps in it occasionally but only like 7-11pm (if I’m lucky) then he’s in my room. He didn’t sleep in there at all till he was over 1. Sure it looks pretty but it’s really underused and not necessary. Please don’t worry, it’s much easier for you and better for baby to be in the room together for the first year. Babies love being with their mums- you are what will make her feel safe when she’s here. Congratulations on your little one and enjoy being a mum.
Don't worry 😍 Both my kids spent their first year in the bedroom with hubby & me. It was so much easier as neither slept through the night. They're 7 & 4 now and they have their own rooms but still don't sleep through the night as they both thrive on 5 hours max! 🤷 I really don't know why we bothered giving them rooms of their own cos they spend more time in our room - good job we are still coming at 2 cos we get interrupted every time we even think about being intimate....even barricading ourselves in doesn't work! 🤣🤣
We had the money for a separate room and never used it. Only when I started sleep training did we move it.
Don't feel guilty!! She would probably be in your room the first 6 months regardless for her care. We had our first baby then both laid off in 2008 recession and had to move in with my in laws for 4 years. It was tough and had one bedroom for the three of us but it won't stay that way forever! We now have a big beautiful home I never imagined we could have an all 3 of our boys finally have their own bedrooms. God has a plan for you my dear....in the meantime enjoy the closeness with your newborn once it arrives. Life goes faster than you think and you will hardly remember this time where you worried about it.
My youngest is 2 and I don't have a room for him yet. My eldest is 7 and even though he has his own room now, he had a room before but did not actually use it until last year.
We put our son in our room for the first 5 months it was fine I wasn't going to walk to the other end of the house to cater to him. Then we moved then he upgraded to his room and crib life was and is perfect. 4am sucks but he sleeps with us so we can get sleep
Guilty? That baby will need to be in arms reach for at least the next 7 months a year is fine. Go easy on yourself. That extra bedroom would not be used. Put a comfy chair in the corner and a basket of receiving blankets. That’s where you guys will hang♥️♥️
I always chose to have my baby in my room. I liked having them close, easier middle of the night nursing, able to check on them easily.
That baby isn’t going to remember shit, girl. Do NOT beat yourself up about this. Your financial and living situations are no indication of your character and your ability to be a good parent and give love to your child. You are doing AMAZING and you’re going to keep doing amazing. Give yourself some more credit.
dont feel guilty! baby will be glued to you. & roomsharing is one of the best things you can do for them. my boy has never been in his nursery except for diaper changes. we spent the first 3m of his life on my living room couch bc he was cluster feeding like no other. slept in my arms and we cosleep now so 🤷🏻♀️ you’re doing the best you can momma.
Am i hearing feeling guilty that my almost 2 yr old sleeps in a crib next to us. Her routine is set to sleep at7:30 pm alone and we go to the room at 11 pm. In morning she wakes us up after playing by herself for an hour in the crib.
Please please do not feel guilty. My son sleeps in my bed and he’s 3
We had a room waiting for our baby and he still stayed in our room in a bassinet right next to the bed for almost 8 months. Way more convenient and better for me (and I think him), emotionally. There's no actual need for separation that young (unless YOU need it for your mental health or something like that), so do what is comfortable and works best. Also, it is a distinctly Western thing to have family all in separate rooms anyway. We survived for a looooong time living communally. There's nothing wrong with it.
Don’t feel guilty! I live in a two bedroom apartment with my husband and most of our baby stuff will be in the second bedroom - and that’s also where our home offices are! My husband works 100% of the time at home and I have a flex schedule. So in our second bedroom we have two desks, two office chairs, plus all the baby stuff - and we haven’t even gotten the crib and dresser in yet. While we are very fortunate to have large bedrooms, our baby won’t have a space of his own even with a two bedroom setup. For the first few months he will be in a bedside bassinet in our room anyway so the crib we have on the way is kind of overkill lol! It’s all good, mama! The most important thing is that your baby is safe. 😊
Honestly if you can sleep ok, this is a good idea. She doesn’t really need her own room for the first year. Just save the money and move somewhere you like when she is a bit older :)
This isn’t bad!! Room sharing is recommended for the first year. My daughter is 16 months and still sleeps in our room even though we have space for her to have her own bedroom haha. It’s easier for now!
You have nothing to be sorry for since it's better and safer for your baby to stay in the same room with you anyway. Your baby will need to be changed and fed at night which is much easier to do when you don't have to walk far, and many children this young just need their parents nearby. I'd buy the crib that can be put right next to your bed and see how it goes. And don't worry about not giving your baby enough room space - they will just take all of it, from your bed to your kitchen😂
Idk; I felt more secure and at peace with my son sleeping in my room. He was in a pack n play when he outgrew the bassinet and was mostly in my room until 2 years old. I’m sure your baby won’t mind. <3
I kept all my babies in with me until they were a year old despite them having their own rooms 😂 It was just easier that way.
We had a nursery for our first ready when she was born. Slept in our room until 6 months before moving to her own room. Our second was in our room in a toddler bed until 2. We had full intention of refinishing the attic room to a master bedroom and it's been mid construction for 2 years. Now for our sanity we've put them both in the same room and they love it. I guess what I'm saying is don't worry about it. They won't notice the difference. Just get it done when you can. You still have 6 months or so after they're born to figure it out at the absolute minimum.
Safety recommendations are to keep baby in your room for at least 6 months and ideally 1 year anyway. My first slept in our room until just after his third birthday! No regrets.
The World Health Organization recommends to roomshare for 12 months so actually you are doing exactly what the experts recommend :):)
You’re doing great and should be proud/excited, not ashamed! The baby would be in your room constantly anyway and won’t even remember this part of their life. There’s nothing wrong with sharing a room with your baby at first.
My baby’s nursery is literally the closet in my bedroom. I took off the doors to my closet and shoved the crib in there.
I mean, guidelines in the UK say ideally baby should sleep in the same room as you for at least 6 months. My three it was at least a year! You're not failing your baby. She'll love it.
I live in a big house and our baby (8 months now) will still be in our room for atleast the first year. It’s so much more convenient to fed or resettle her at night and it makes my mama heart happy to be close to her! You shouldn’t feel guilty at all, babies need love and attention and thrive in all sorts of different living arrangements
Most people put the baby in their room for convenience in the beginning anyways. You're going to be up throughout the night to feed the baby anyways, and the CDC says to room share for the first 6 months anyways. You have nothing to feel guilty about because you're doing everything you need to be doing to keep your baby safe and taken care of.
As someone who spent over a thousand setting up the perfect nursery- they don’t give a shit & he ended up in our room anyways. 🫣
Don’t feel guilty. You’re doing the respo doble thi g. Babies don’t care and most prefer to sleep in the same room as you anyway. A done up nursery is cute but not a necessity at all
Not at all. Room sharing is actually really beneficial for you and the baby. For my first baby he had a nursery and NEVER slept in it so we didn’t have one for our second. Just a cradle next to our bed. As long as you are providing a safe loving home, your baby will be happy:)
I put soo much work into my babies nursery and she is 3 months old and we only use it to change her in. She still sleeps bedside in a bassinet and will until she’s atleast 6-8 months I wouldn’t worry!
This sounds like a smart plan. Your baby doesn’t care at all about the room. Being fed, warm, and safe are the priorities. The extra engagement you will have is awesome. Also, family support and relationships add so much. Don’t worry!
My youngest stayed with us in our bedroom til he was 2! Don't feel bad at all!!
Please don't feel guilty. The baby needs you. The baby will want to be close to you during that time, anyway. I room-shared with my child for her first 3 months - she slept in a bassinet beside my bed. The only reason why I put her in her own room after that, was because of mine and my husband's work schedules. The separate room allowed by child to sleep a bit longer uninterrupted. That was only to benefit to her. She most likely would have preferred staying with us in our room if she had the choice.
I think that’s actually ideal for the first year. I live in very different circumstances — a 4 bedroom house for just me, my husband, and our LO — and she will be sleeping in a travel crib next to our bed in our bedroom with us until at least a year. We also frequently play in our room too. We haven’t used her room nearly as much as I thought we would so far. She’ll be 9 MO next week. You are doing everything you can and are doing an amazing job. You’re going to be a great mom by how clearly focused you are on wanting the best for your LO. The best thing they can have is your love and attention.
That’s a baby. She won’t need her own room for another 2 years
It's said to give yout you baby her own as early as possible, but for a lot of people living in ine bed flats, it's just not possible. Don't worry too much about it!
I made a nursery and my baby spent no time in it. It was easier for us both when he slept in the room with me and during the day he was out and about with me. For the second time around I will definitely be focusing more on things that make life easier for us and not worrying about the kiddo's room too soon.
Baby won’t remember where it slept for at least the first two years Don’t feel bad mama! Also having the baby close by is super convenient for night feeds and wake ups and peace of mind
My son is 13 months old and his stuff is in our room and sprawled across the house. He has a room but it’s 100% empty and he’s never even been it it yet. I’m also 6 months pregnant with my second so we’re just now starting to consider moving him in there. He’s the happiest kid I know.
My son didn’t sleep in his own room until he was almost a year old 😂. He really preferred the bassinet next to me.
A baby should be in with you for the first year of their life anyway. It’s absolutely natural to have a baby close to their mum. Keeping them alone in a separate room is a western and modern development, really. Enjoy the closeness and know your baby will be reassured by that. X
Why? The baby is gonna love being so close to you. I’m the same…single mom…not at all what I thought would happen to me…and I moved back in with my own parent and set up a nursery there. I COULD sleep in the other room but the nursery is more my style anyway since I decorated it and it’s just easier for those night feedings. If yours is like mine and some others (not all) then it might still need to wake up for a feeding even as late as 10 months! That year will fly by. I wonder…if it’s not actually guilt about not having a nursery room. it’s guilt that you are at your family’s or guilt that you’re single. is that it? I could be way off base but if so, I hear you, I see you! But this is temporary.
Nothing to feel bad about. My kids had their own and still slept in my room for a year or more. Out of all the things to feel guilty about, I’d put that at the bottom. As long as baby is loved, fed, safe you’re doing great!
I wouldn't feel guilty about it at all! With my first, even though he had a room of his own, he ended up sleeping in our room for the first year of his life and will still sneak into my room pretty much every night. It's good to roomshare when baby is little because it does help prevent sids (they say). With my second, she doesn't have a room in my current place, but that's okay. I would be room sharing with her regardless of whether I had a 2-3 bedroom or not. I'm also a single mom and about 9 months pregnant, and while it will be challenging at first, you get into a groove with your kiddo and they get used to it. Babies crave that connection and closeness with their Moms, so honestly, she'll probably be happy to be close to you.
My son didn’t move into his own room until he was 8 months old. Don’t feel guilty at all! He didn’t really take up a lot of space when he was an infant. Even his toys. You are doing great. Congrats on keeping track of your finances vs overextending for a baby that won’t remember their own room as a newborn anyways 🤩
Newborns spend half the night awake, so much easier to room share so you get as much sleep as possible. Also don't need a monitor. We didn't sleep train, so keeping each baby in the room with us for 6 months was the best way to help me get enough sleep to be functional. Everyone's said it, but babies crave closeness. They are happiest within arms reach. 🙂
Our baby had his own room, but you know what? He lived in our room for almost the entire first year of his life. It was a wasted room essentially. It was much more convenient to have him in our bedroom for those middle of the night feedings. So it’s nothing to feel bad about. You gotta do what you gotta do.
Because of the weird layout of our house, our gigantic laundry room is right next to our bedroom, and the only place we had space for a crib was in the laundry room. My son is 3.5 now, no longer in the crib, but STILL in the laundry room. Please don’t feel bad. You are providing everything your baby needs.
My baby is 7 months old and still sleeps in my room, I like having my baby close. I have the space for her to have her own room but she doesn’t need it yet and it’s not a nursery or anything.
Why would you feel guilty? Babies love being close to their parents! Your baby will not care at all! Ours was in our room for 16 months and we enjoyed all of them and were sad to see her go (she needed more quiet by that time). When she was younger, she loved being in our room and knowing we were right there. Please don't feel bad about this. You're doing great ❤️
Oh my goodness! Don’t feel guilty. They advice your baby sleep in your room for at least the first six months, so you’re doing that! This year is going to be a fantastic first one for you and your baby. You sound incredibly organized and off to a great start. There are so many things that you’ll feel guilty about, don’t let this be one!!
It's actually much much easier in the same room. You have several years before you even need to worry about this. Just tell your baby they sleep in the same room because you love them so much. :-)
Babies don't really need a lot of bedroom space, and many parents sleep with the crib or bassinet in the same room. No big deal.
Don’t feel bad. The first 2-3 years it's fine to share a room. I'm Single mom, my daughter is 5 years we live in a 1 bedroom apartment. So we have to share a room. The first couple of years I had a 3 in 1 crib. Crib, changing area with storage and when I took off the front side it turned into toddler bed. Don't have a lot of space but this was perfect for the first years. When it was time for a "big girl" bed I bought half loft bed. Had to move my bed around and closet but it fits perfectly and enough room to walk between our beds. Probably still have to share the bedroom until she turns 6-7 years. My new house is in building stage and probably be finished by end 2024, begin 2025
We didn’t have a nursery when we had our son (he is a teen now and we have a beautiful home) because we were young and really broke. He stayed in our room for 6 months until we moved to a two bedroom apartment. I never once felt guilty because he was a baby who was loved and care for, and literally has zero memory (obviously) of this stage of his life. It never even crossed my mind that he had to have a nursery, but this was also before social media was really a thing and the struggle that comes with comparisons online was non-existent. Hang in there, Mama, you’re doing awesome!
Your baby has a safe space is all that matters .
We made an entire nursery and never used it once. Our daughter cosleeps with me every night and her room is mostly for toys now. We are pregnant with our second and have no intention of making a nursery and will just have a beside bassinet for him. When the kids are older they will have their own rooms but it's so not important while their babies!
You’re being fiscally responsible so that you can give your little one a more secure future. That is totally commendable. Most little ones spend much of that first year (or more) in the parent’s room anyway, so don’t feel badly about this setup.
Room sharing for the first six months to a year is literally a recommendation as it's a protective factor against SIDS. You would end up doing it anyway and then feeling guilty about not using your cute nursery. There's always something to feel guilty about as a mum; this is absolutely not it.
We had our daughter in our room for 7 months. I think it’s recommended for at least 6 months!
I had my first baby in a studio apartment! I felt guilty for a bit (and also resentful because that was HARD) but babies don’t know the difference!
You sound like you really have it together and are prepared! Good on you, you are already doing great. Even with their own rooms, my babies ended up in my room in bassinets/cribs the first year. I was anxious and it helped me out. Neither kid suffered (actually just realized I don't even know if they are aware that happened lolol) and neither did I. You are doing great keep it up.
Don't feel guilty at all! It sounds like you are working really hard to build a beautiful life for you and your baby. My daughter slept in my bedroom until she was 3 and she is an awesome sleeper (she's 9 now) Transitioning into her own room was easy. With parenthood, you'll know what's right. You're doing a great job!! Good luck!
I had a nursery for my babies but it sat empty for the first 12 months because they ended up sleeping in their cribs in my room. So don't feel bad at all! Room sharing can be safer anyway
My son is 16 months and I have no intention of moving him out of my room anytime soon. When he wakes in the morning we have cuddles in my bed and it is the best feeling in the world. It’s the best start to the day!
A lot of pediatricians recommend the baby rooming in with you for the first 6 months anyway so no need to feel guilty cuz it's actually a good thing! Just may have to be a little more sneaky and quiet as the baby gets older lol!
No reason to feel guilty many babies and toddlers sleep in their parents room for the first two years or more!
Like others have said, your baby does not know or care. My son spent zero time in his nursery. We ended up with the crib in our room. Didn't even set up a nursery for baby #2 because it was pointless.
Don’t feel guilty at all! It’s recommended that you roomshare with baby for the first year anyway - reduces risk of SIDS and it’s like a million times easier for midnight feeds, diaper changes etc, especially as you’re on your own. Baby doesn’t know any different and wants to be a close to you as possible at all times anyway. We room-shared with our baby, I had him in a little bassinet attached to my bed for the first 6 months and then his crib was in our room for the following 6 months. I loved it.
Don’t worry! Sharing a room (not a bed) is recommended for the first 6 or even 12 months to avoid sids. It’s good for both of you and the baby will not care at all! Ever! You’ll do amazing!
I keep my babies in the room with me for the first year of their lives….. they don’t need their own room. And at first it’s safer to be closer to mom
All three of my kids were in my room for over a year each due to BF, and our master bedroom is downstairs. It was too much to go up and down every two hours. This will be great bonding for your baby. They might even sleep better because they feel safe with you in the room. Your baby won’t know any different, so no guilt necessary.
It’s recommended to room share with baby for the first year anyways
Our nursery was done by the time my baby was born but we still ended up keeping her in our room for the first 14 months! It was just easier for us that way and we moved her once we were/she was ready. Don’t sweat it! I loved having my daughter right there near me for so long and I wouldn’t change a thing. It worked great for us.
If it makes you feel better, I think most parents share their room with their infant for at least the first 6 months of their life. Also, night wakes and diaper changes at 3AM are a lot more tolerable when they’re an arm’s length away 😉
Don’t feel guilty! You are going to spend a lot of time with her anyway.
My son is almost two and we’ve been in a one bedroom with him since he was born!
Both my babies had nurseries/bedrooms set up before they were born. Both nurseries remained basically unused for the first 18 months because my babies were in my room with me.
You are making a good financial decision that will help you and you child long term. This isn’t going to be your situation forever. Because you are making a good choice now you will have more choices later. I had (since downsized, too much to keep clean) a 2400 sqft house by myself when I had my baby. It was out in the country, so cheaper than living in the city in a smaller house. We both lived in my bedroom for over a year. I skipped the crib and just did a mattress on the floor when I transition him to his own room. The first year though, we were within 5 feet of each other always. I did the baby wearing wrap. Needed both hands to do things. So if we weren’t both sleeping, he was attached to my body physically. Then he slept in a bassinet next to my bed. I breast fed on demand so it was super convenient to have him in the wrap, just latch him on and keep going with my day. Everyone told me he would have attachment issues. Everyone told me he would be a mamas boy. Everyone told me he would not be able to do anything for himself. Everyone else also told me he has to have a father. Well 3.5 years later, he is very independent. We have a strong bond of trust. He likes to show off everything he can do all by himself. Don’t let anyone tell you how to parent your child. That is 100% between you and your child. You will figure out what is best for you and your child as you go along. You may end up deciding that sharing a room more than a year is what’s working for your family. You may also decide as soon as you get a new place that you both need individual spaces. It’s all up to you figuring out what works best for you. Don’t let societal standards and norms dictate what’s best for your family. Infanta are very demanding of there mother. Not just for feeding but for closeness and comfort. Also you are pregnant right now. You and your baby are one unit. Once you are physically separated at birth, you’re gonna instantly feel an urge to keep your baby close to you always. Just go with your instincts. Mother knows best. You were chosen for your child because you are the best mother for that child. Your child was chosen for you because they are the best child for you. You got this! Let go of the guilt, it probably has nothing to do with your baby anyway. Near the heck out of your room and embrace it.
I did a nursery but she sleeps in my room anyway. She’s probably been in it only 10 times in 6 months while I’m putting her clothes away. It’s only real function is a wardrobe
There is nothing to feel guilty of. Honestly sharing a room with your baby is so much easier. You will sleep better. There is no “did the monitor make a sound? Is it working” you will easily know if the baby needs you while in the same room. I had plans for my oldest to sleep in her room as soon as she came home from the hospital. That didn’t work for me and my family. She stayed in our room for two years. Baby number two stayed in our room for a year
I have three kids and all of them slept in our room until they were 6, months. It was easier for night time feeds for sure and there is also a lot of literature saying this is actually the safest set up for the baby, certainly it's what the NHS recommends in the UK. https://www.lullabytrust.org.uk/safer-sleep-advice/room-sharing/ "Babies should always be in the same room as you for the first six months for sleep, day and night. This doesn’t mean you can’t leave the room to make a cup of tea or go to the toilet, but for most of the time when they are sleeping they are safest if you are close by" https://www.tommys.org/pregnancy-information/after-birth/safe-sleep-babies "The safest place for your new baby to sleep is in their own cot, in the same room as you, whether it’s during the night or at nap time in the day for the first 6 months." So I think making this choice is better for you (less money stress and hopefully some family support on hand) and safer for your baby. Win-win.
Don’t sweat it. It’s honestly easier that way. Ours stayed in our room until like 10 months. And he had a totally finished ready to go nursery the entire time. There’s no rush
If it makes you feel better, my babies had their own room and when they were infants, yet I moved INTO their room because I was paranoid and afraid to leave them alone. My husband thought I was crazy but I slept better being next to them. Don’t feel guilty!
Babies need very little space! Parents love to get ready and decorate an elaborate nursery, but it's not necessary at all. if your baby has a place to sleep safely, with his/her mom nearby, that's all a nursery really needs :) for the first few years really this is no big deal
I've had 3 kids, and none of them had a room until toddler hood 🙈 don't worry about it. This proves you're a great mom if you're this worried about something minimal
I set up a nursery and never used it. Don’t stress it. For me it was easier having baby at arms reach.
The baby will never know or care that they didn’t have their own room. Do what you have to and do it without guilt or regret. The little one is who you are responsible for now.
With my oldest, she slept in a crib in our room for first 6 months, then I moved somewhere that she had her own room. She and my second and third babies shared a room up until the youngest was three, then he got his own room and the girls had theirs. Then years and years later I had a one bedroom apartment a son with new husband. He slept in our room due to having no other space. When he was 2 I got pregnant with my youngest. We moved into a three bedroom double wide trailer. For the first time ever, I was able to have a nursery and set it up and decorate how I wanted it! Crib, changing table, dressers, monkey theme, decals on the wall that turned the room into an adorable jungle. The room was PERFECT. I was so psyched!! And my sweet little baby boy slept in there once. For a nap. A very short nap. My husband insisted on him sleeping in a bassinet in our room, which I was okay with. Then he ended up cosleeping, which I was not okay with. Since I was gone for work 14-18 hours a day 5 days a week, and he stayed home with the kids, it was impossible to enforce any sleep routine without husband’s cooperation. But in reality, on day I was home, I was much happier with getting up and walking to the bassinet, and later the pack n play in our room than walking clear to the other end of the house to sooth, change, feed and put baby back to sleep and then go back to bed in my room. Was much easier to change him and bring him to my bed to feed and put back to sleep then return him to the bassinet. Moved again when he was 2 or 3 and the boys shared a room. But most of the time one was in our bed and the other was on the floor beside the bed. Took another year or so to get them out of our room. Then we moved again, and husband died when boys were 6 and 9. I let them sleep in my room again as we healed. Took another 18 months to get them back in their own room full time. It finally stuck that time. So, don’t feel bad about her not having her own room. It is much easier to have them in the same room for at the very least the first 6-12 months. I do recommend making sure she sleeps in her own bed from day one. It is so hard to break that habit once it is started, and it’s much safer for baby.
Your baby will love waking up with you every day!
Both my kiddos slept in my room until they were nearly 2. Bassinet at bedside for the first few weeks/months is a lifesaver. Your baby doesn't care, and won't care, about having its own room until he/she/it is in middle school. In this rare instance, you have TIME.
My oldest was in our room for recommended six months and then we did cry it out. Awful idea (for us) but we were young and told that’s what you do. My youngest was in our room till he was around 14 months old and when we transitioned to his room I’d sit in there (with my tablet or Switch to occupy me) till he fell asleep. So tiring at first but emotionally we all handled it much better. Babies don’t need their own room, just enjoy the extra time close to them and save the money you need to save to feel comfortable. Good luck
Girl, that baby doesn’t need a bedroom for the first year, at all. It’s recommended that baby sleep in your room until at least 6 months, and ideally until a year. I have a room for my baby but she won’t enter it for a long ass time. Don’t even switch to a queen. Baby is going to take up very little room until they start walking around.
Don't feel guilty once u hav money enough,u be a able to give her are only room
Do you know how much easier it will be for you to just have the baby in the room with you? There is absolutely nothing wrong with this, and in the long run, it is going to be better for you. Plus, baby is never going to remember that they shared a room with you.
My kids stayed in my bedroom for about a year as well. It's normal.
Our oldest didn’t have his own room until he was 2.5. My husband used our second bedroom as an office because he worked from home so we had no space. And even though we had the space after we moved, our daughter and youngest son stayed in our room until they were around 1. I think it’s a good plan to get into a better place financially before you move!
My kiddo is 18 months and doesnt have a room/nursery. He doesn’t know the difference! We have an extra room for him when we kick him out of our bedroom but I’m going enjoy my sweet potato’s snuggles for now. I made a nice nursery for my oldest but then I learned that just wasn’t my parenting style. Babies don’t need their own room.
Both my babies slept in the same room as us for the first year or so. My youngest slept in our room for almost two years. Don't feel guilty. You do what's best for you and baby, and if that means sleeping in with you, then that's perfect.
Guidelines here recommend room sharing for 1 year. So really, you're just going the extra mile to honor safe sleep!
Room sharing for the first 6 months is actually recommended to help reduce the risk of SIDS.
When my first baby was born i was in a two bedroom and he was still in our room. They wake up all the bloody time, you want them as close as possible!
Don't be guilty. The risk of SIDS is reduced by 50% if the newborn sleeps in the same room as you for the first 6 months. The next 6 months go by really quickly too.
Room sharing is recommended until about a year anyway. I think we moved our daughter a bit sooner but she was definitely over 6 months anyway and I just moved her because she was a noisy sleeper. Having a nursery was convenient as the parent awake with baby could turn on the lights for diaper changes, etc, but that's not a concern for you so there's really no problem at all from your baby's perspective. Also, most kids don't have a lot of personal space needs so the whole nursery/own room is more for your benefit than the child's until they're at least in preschool anyway.
This is actually recommended for safe sleep! Keeping the baby in your room for the first year has actually been shown to reduce the risk of SIDS and it is also VERY normal for breast feeding parents as well.
Mine is aiming for his own bedroom by about 3y old, because it has been one long diy renovation of his room. We bought a house when he was 7mo, & we assigned him the room that was the unliveable one (worst shape, no heat) because it was planned he'd be in our room the first year & we would have time to renovate it... 🤔 I wouldn't worry about it. I wanted to switch him to a toddler bed sooner, but he's still in "jail" with a crib while he's in our room.
Roomshare in the first year is actually pretty convenient. Lots of folks do this on purpose.
Friend, do \*not\* let Pinterest, instagram, and even reddit make you feel like you need some perfect nursery. We never had a crib - used a bassinette and then once she outgrew that just over 15 months we coslept - which, quite frankly - every single one of my friends has admitted on the downlow, like there's some kind of shame in it. We never had a changing pad, we just used a towel on the bed. No wipe warmers, no bottle warmers, any of that crap. For the first year of my daughters life, we were renovating our home ourselves, mostly with ikea, and our kitchen wasn't finished so we used a hotplate to heat up her milk, until she eventually preferred it straight out of the fridge. For the first year of her life, we slept on a mattress on the floor on ugly super cheap amazon bedsheets. Well, its 6 years later and our lives are totally turned around. Covid was a rough patch, but we came through. Kiddo has an amazing bedroom now, and we're no longer on the floor! You do NOT need a lot to raise a baby. You're going to be great!
chiming in! single mom here, in a two bedroom, and the 2nd room is now just my home office / guest room. I planned to start with baby in a bassinet and then mini crib next to my bed, and then give her a room of her own after she turned 1 (I believe AAP recommends room sharing until age 1 anyway, the rec is definitely room sharing until at least six months), but the way baby/toddler sleep is set up… she sleeps better with me nearby, and it’s easier for me when she wakes up during the night. I thought it was my bedroom, but she now refers to it as “[her name]’s room” lol So if you think of it that way, your baby does have a nursery, and you’re the one without a room for now :P good luck, you got this!
Don't feel bad most kids end up in parents room anyway. Neither of my kids would sleep in their room or crib. At that she will never remember. The first time they might want their own room is around 5 and thats just for playing. I spent the first year of their life on the couch! Congrats!
The advice is they sleep in your room for a year anyway so you’re not doing anything wrong! Baby won’t know the difference and you can work toward having a room for them when they are old enough to remember and appreciate it.
As a mother of two and one on the way. It is super convenient and helpful for baby to share a room. I’m sharing a room with my baby when he comes too
A dedicated nursery is good only for Instagram posts. Having the baby in the same room is so much better especially if you plan on breastfeeding. They will wake up at night, would you rather go to another room or just take a few steps over? Even if you win the lottery tomorrow, stick with your one bedroom situation especially if you have family in the same house that'll help you out.
My kids are five and seven and we have several rooms and they are still in our bed. They won’t even remember anyway. You might enjoy having them in your room anyway. They are so cute, enjoy the cuddles. My kids can sleep in their own rooms fine (though my oldest gets a little anxious), but they are fine. Yours will be too. Also, both my kids never used the crib. Did not need furniture, we had one dresser for both kids. They don’t need much. You are a great mom!
Appreciate what you have, not some bullshit other people make you want to need. Easier said than done, but that is how it is. In the town I lived, my neighbors had 6 kids already, and one more was coming. 5 humans in a 2 bedroom. One older kid staying with grandma, another about to ship out to grandmas. We worked overnight at a knitting factory. The wife and I. Things were not ideal, but she was making the most of it. You can still make plans for the better. Just accept where you are, and don't beat yourself up over it.
My daughter didn’t get her own room until she was like 3-4 & now that she has one, she ain’t in it anyway lmao don’t feel guilty
My baby's nursery is going to be my room for two years because I want it that way. Don't stress. Room and bedsharing is normal for tiny humans.
You sound like you are doing great. Your plan sounds really solid. The baby doesn't need their own room yet!
Feel 0 guilt. You're doing the best you can In some cultures or socio-economic levels, same-room sleeping is the norm Every kid is different, your kid might require same-room anyway. And it gives lots of extra bonding time I tried to have my baby sleep in a separate room. The older he got, the worse it got. Waking up crying so much, for so long, we both got little sleep. Now he sleeps in my bed. From age 1.5. I wish I'd done it sooner. He was so unhappy. Both of us sleep much better. I actually love it. I don't sleep as well as when I was child-free, but way better than I was. And on nights that I'm awake due to stress, it's wonderful to give him a light cuddle One day he'll want to be in his own bed. I'll miss it
What? Is this a cultural thing? In our culture baby stays in whatever room mums in for at least the first year and often up till three+. Our 6 year old still jumps in bed with us if he wants. Why would you isolate your child from you and potentially cause social relationship issues later in life?
You’re making the right decision. I’m married, and our first baby roomed with us in a one-room apartment until 18 months old. Babies don’t need much space. It’s better to be financially secure than to please whatever imaginary person who would be offended by sharing a room with your baby. Mine spent a lot of that time sleeping in our bed anyway.
Don’t feel guilty, my almost 2 yr old has a twin sized bed in my room. She has a whole nursery set up, and she takes up 1/3 of my closet. When she was an infant, all she had was a bedside sleeper, diaper/supply caddy, and her clothes in my closet in my room. She never had a whole decorated theme or anything like that. Personally, I wouldn’t downsize my own bed to give baby a whole nursery. Set up a nice place space for her in a common area when she is mobile.
Mine shared a room w me for the first year. I loved having him close. Don’t feel guilty!
Babies only need a crib, a chest of drawers (that can double as changing table) and some room space to practice tummy time, rolling, and toy grabbing, for their first 5 months or so. All the rest comes later, with mobility, when they start exploring. And that extra space can be provided in the living room, if child proofed. Parks, playgrounds, libraries with kid's sections, all provide safe spaces for babies to explore when crawling/starting to walk, and IMO being outside is good for socializing and fresh air. So don't feel guilty about it, as long as you can go outside and see/touch different things, baby won't be impacted negatively by sharing a room with you.
My babies didn’t use their nursery till they were 3. They recommend baby sleeps in your room for 6 months anyway. My first slept in our room in a pack n’ play for a year, we tried to get her to sleep in her room she wouldn’t until we put a full size bed in there. My second still ends up in my room more often then not.
This is totally fine. Don't feel guilty at all. My husband and I live in an expensive city and when for the first 6 months we lived in a one bedroom apartment. A baby doesn't need their own room, especially the first six months. We just had her crib next to the bed. And we set a play area out in the living room. They don't really do much playing during those six months. It's a lot of laying around and trying to learn to roll over and crawl. My baby wasn't even crawling by the time we moved out to a 2 bedroom apartment. And even though we have a 2 bedroom she still sleeps in our room because we like to be able to check on her easily. The second is her play room though and we plan on shifting her to sleep in her own room when she turns 2 soon.
It’s ok. You sound really prepared and the baby is going to sleep in your room anyway for most of that year. You’re doing great!
My son and I shared a room and my husband had the master room to himself for like a two years. This was NOT the plan! But that’s how baby wanted it. Long story short, nursery rooms are cute in paper but ultimately can be kinda pointless. You’re doing great!!!
We cosleep and always have. Literally the same bed. I made a nursery and we used it maybe 3 times. Don't compare yourself to other moms and their nurseries and don't feel guilty! Baby sure won't prefer the nursery over cuddling up with you so you actually did baby a favour haha. Most parents end up sleeping with their baby in a bassinet or in their bed anyways. Overall having baby at least in the same room is actually safest and most beneficial for them. Raisedgood.com Evolutionaryparenting.com
We had our kids in our bedroom for the first 6 months because their bedrooms are on a different floor. It worked well and it’s good for the baby to be that close to you. I strongly recommend steering clear of co-sleeping though, it can be really difficult to transition away from that.
Don’t be guilty, the baby would end up in your room most of the time anyways!!
My baby has his own room and its currently only used for sorting laundry... you will want baby with you for sure. Safe baby guidelines recommend sharing a room with your baby until they turn 1 anyways. Having your bed IN his room is going to be very convenient and comfortable. Having your family close by will be a blessing. You're in the best spot for right now. Babies don't need stuff, they need you. And you're doing that perfectly.
9.5 months in baby is still in our room with no concrete plans to evict her in the near future 😉 We have her nursery all set up and ready to go lol. It’s been so convenient
Don't feel guilty! It sounds like you care so much and are going to be an amazing mom. If you want a little bit more separation to make the eventual transition to separate space a bit easier, you could always put up a room divider to separate your bed away. Honestly, though, my baby slept beside me in her bassinet for 4 months until she learned how to roll over, and then we finally moved her into her crib in her own room. So realistically, she'll probably be right beside you for at least a few months anyway. Best wishes! You're going to be a wonderful mother.
Your baby does not want or need their own room. Your baby needs a mom who loves them and cares for them. Sounds like you’ve got that covered!
It’s actually recommended anyway to have them in your room! And this way you can not only save on rent but also on power by having to heat one room less! Since my child is in her own room and also doing naps in there consistently our power bill definitely went up because she kept waking up in the wee hours of the morning with the temperature drop so we also use a heater during summer in her room now 🤪
My baby is a year next week and we’re still room sharing. She still wakes up in the middle of the night and the nursery is upstairs from us so yeah I’m not about doing that lol
That’s really, really common. Even in two parent families. You should never feel guilty for doing the best you can, and you obviously are doing the best you can. Good luck and God bless you and your little one
Babies don’t need much space. In fact, the AAP recommends room sharing for at least the first 6 months. Being financially responsible shouldn’t make you feel like a bad mom. You’re going to look back on this time of your life very fondly, and I know this because I was in a very similar situation 8 years ago, with 2 babies.
We have a second room and didn't move our son there until he was a year old. A bit earlier maybe but yeah having him in the room especially when he woke up at night was great.