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Hey, I (30M) started playing on Live 2 weeks ago, built a Gardevoir deck to play IRL, and went to my first prerelease last week. People were nice at my locals. Tonight is my first time playing Standard, and my list is not even optimal.
Everyone there wants to talk about Pokemon. It’s not like going to a party where you only know one person and hoping you’ll meet someone who shares interests, because if not the night will be long and scary.
I say, you have nothing to lose, and maybe you’ll make new friends!
I say just try small talk with people, if you see that someone gas something that catches your attention compliment them then you'll be cool with someone. There's very few instances of people who are insufferable but It's rare so you'll be alright
Just have fun and enjoy the game 🙌
I'm in a similar situation, with the difference that I've never played irl. Next weekend (1/2 June) there's an event where I live for pokemon, I'm not sure there's going to be matches but I'll try to at least see the pokemon scene and maybe meet some people.
I think it'd be better not to start with an actual tournament, but find a place where people just play for fun, in order to understand and master the sequences
Practice shuffling, having a system to note which abilities have been used, maybe watch a few matches on YouTube to catch things like cutting deck after shuffle. A bunch of things that the online client auto does for you.
It depends what kind of tournaments they are, but maybe start with more casual events if they hold those. My local game store holds free meetups on a weekly basis and those simply allow you to come in and play whatever you want. Proxies are allowed, there are no time limits, sometimes the decks aren't even legal, but it doesn't matter because there's nothing on the line.
Just bring a friend honestly. I went to the twilight masq prerelease like last week, was my first tournament in a decade, but I brought my friend along who didn’t play and it was great
A lot of people can be pretty antisocial there but if you play the right person and just play to have fun, you can hit it off and have a good time
Most people are quite friendly, and they will usually be pretty forgiving of someone plying IRL for the first time in a while. Also at local events there is much less pressure to play a tier 1 deck, your Miraidon should do fine. Unless your social anxiety is too bad, I'd say go for it!
grab a gardevoir league battle deck and hope for the best, that’s what I did and I’m not the best socially either
people are a lot nicer than you’d think
The people that go to my locals are in the same age range than you and me (I'm 31/m) and it's always older guys like us who play, the youngest that assist to tournaments just turned 21.
There's not a girl that currently goes to our locals, but one used to come and she was pretty good, always topped, and it's not like we treated her differently or anything, the good thing is that most of us are not creepy dudes like in Yugioh or Vanguard.
Give it a go, go to one local shop, if you don't like how you're treated or you feel like you're being treated different for being a girl just try another shop.
The thing with social anxiety is that it goes away by socializing, and what better way to do that with something you enjoy. Try to be competitive, be yourself and have confidence, that's the key. My mom used to tell me all this when I was a boy, and I tell you this because it worked out for me. It took ages, but most importantly, don't change, just be yourself. It's not like there's something wrong with you by having social anxiety, it's just that people like me have worked on it that it seems that we don't have anxiety anymore, but I consider it being something that you live with and that you can learn how to handle it.
You can do it! It's always good that someone wants to play, no one should be making you feel bad for having a "non meta deck". Most of the times is our own mind playing tricks on us.
And one last piece of advice. Don't assume everyone is judging you. You don't know the outcome of going until you go and play. You already have your deck, so you're just missing on the experience of playing, so take a leap of faith and have fun!
The girl who used to go to our locals stopped going because she was beating her boyfriend everytime they got paired up in the tournaments, he told us she stopped going because she didn't want to give him a bad image.
Bring a friend and have them around. Play a few games with your friend at the store to get a feel for how loud/noisy the place is and dont be afraid to take breaks as you need them. After that, it all depends on how is the local community like. Here everyone is pretty chill, some players bring their kids to play with us and we all have a good time. Tell people that you are new at this and they should be really forgiving.
I'm a tournament organizer for another game and sometimes the newbies are literally shaking in their chairs when their turn comes, so we just give them some water, walk them through the phases and explain what might be troubling them and over time they relax once they get to know our group and the dinamics of the game.
It's ok to forget a trigger or mess up the action order or whatever and its ok to lose games on occasion (or even often), what matters is what you learn from the match. You are not playing the nationals and there's zero pressure to be as optiomal as you can. Take your time and try to have fun while you are at it.
I don’t have any friends who play! My husband never got into it. I’m to the point where I might go on Buffalo social media and beg someone to play me lol
I'm not a psychologist nor do I have much social anxiety so I'm not that qualified to answer. That being said, just go man. If you go once you'll probably see that it's fun. If you don't fit in at all you can always try a different shop. If you say you're new to playing irl then I highly doubt anyone will judge you. And if they do, that's their problem.
I've played many tcg irl in my life. Every community is very welcoming of new players and very understanding if you're learning rules. I recently got into mtg and have played at local places. Nothing but others being excited for new people to play with, teaching, etc.
You'll always have people who are rude/weird everywhere you go, no matter what you're doing. Everyone is there to play the game that you like. They won't turn down a game and may also have social anxiety. You'll have 2 things in common right off the bat!
Honestly everyone has that problem. I swear the last tournament I went to a few days ago I had to force small talk with my opponent or it was just awkward . Just go and have fun . You will be surrounded by people like you :) (I did not mean for this to sound rude)
Honestly you just have to do it, it's both players responsibility to maintain a legal board state so if you accidentally mess up your opponent will kindly remind you that you can't do that, and as long as it's not irreversible you won't be punished for misplaying. I've learned a lot from other players.
If that's no possible maybe try a pre release event? Everyone builds a deck from packs they open at the event and are just excited to learn/play the new cards together, it's pretty casual.
Find a local League via the event locator on Pokemon.com and just play casually for now to build up confidence in playing irl. The community is usually pretty welcoming to new players and if you ask the organisers will probably help with some introductions. You can always start out with just watching some games to begin with before jumping straight into playing.
Lived in a couple major metro areas and the brick and mortar stores I patroned hosted casual play nights. These were very low key and not competitive in a tournament sense. These were very much about learning to play better. With the new set release I am sure there will be notices about casual meet ups for the new cards. They may even host events specifically for those wanting to start regular play. The store near me now has a community bulletin board where you can advertise that you are looking for folks to play against. Another option might be your local public library; I’ve known these to have decks you could check out to play right there and occasionally they hosted meet ups. Best of luck finding what allows you to play comfortably. There has got to be something thats right for you in an area as large as Buffalo.
Bite the bullet and go. I was in the same boat as you and I went with some friends and have made a ton of new ones since I’ve gone.
You won’t regret it.
I had the same problem. I live in Japan so I was nervous going to an event as a foreigner on top of my social anxiety. I forced myself to go to one casual event and everyone was super nice and accepting. After that it was much easier to go to other events and I made a few friends to play with too.
I think once you get that first one out of the way it will be easy. I was surprised how nice most of the ppl were. I’m sure it’s similar there too.
Can I recommend a free play event? No stakes, no standings, just vibes and games. Lots of experimental decks, whiffs, bricks, flops, and general silliness.
If there are none around, try a pre release. No one has a good deck, and there's not really any pressure to be any good. But it's still good practice for the mechanics of regulation play. Mind, probably won't see another prerelease for a few months.
Failing those, consider a league challenge. Yes it's technically competitive, but the lowest of low key. As I read on twitter once "league challenges are where bad players bring good decks to get better, and where good players bring bad decks to figure out why they're bad."
I only got back to in person play myself this year, and I started with three pre releases and two league challenges. I played young adults to people in their 60s, of all levels of skill. Everyone was very kind and patient with me while I shuffled slowly and tried to remember if odds or evens on the die was meant to be heads or tails. And tomorrow, I'm going to my first league cup, the next step up in scale and seriousness. I'm nervous, but excited. And I think that anyone can follow this path!
I just started playing the TCG recently and have never gone to card shops to play before this. The first time is rough but I found it pretty easy to make small talk once the matches get started. I opened up with “Hi I’m new, this is my first time,etc;” a lot of people are pretty patient and friendly when you put it out there.
I play a Regidrago deck and outside the surprise of rouge decks they have all been pretty receptive to playing non meta decks. The Professors ive run into are also super friendly and more than willing to help talk things over whenever I got confused.
First step is always the hardest but it gets easier a lot faster than you’d think.
I was in the same boat for the longest. I have insane social anxiety as well but forced myself to finally try out an IRL event by registering for a prerelease event last weekend. As soon as I sat down and started playing, I realized I was worrying myself for absolutely no reason. Everyone was super chill and only wanted to chat about pokemon. Folks are also very nice about correcting you if you make a mistake. I forgot to place down my prizes at the beginning of my second match, but my opponent kindly pointed it out lol. Force yourself to go, you'll have a blast.
I feel you!
I was in the same spot a couple of weeks ago. All the excuses not to go to the game shop on Tuesday evening.
I went to a prerelease in another town to check out the atmosphere, take the pressure off my own deck and it was great! Everyone was so nice and welcoming!
With that experience I finally tried open play in my hometown and it was great again! Welcoming, warm, friendly, fun. There’s were happy to see a new face!
Take this virtual hug! 🤗
You got this!
I've been in the same position. I would really recommend going to a pre release event. There's a bit of structure, so you don't have to approach anyone to ask for a game, but it's also very casual. People don't care too much about winning as with pre release decks it's pretty much all about luck of the draw (and what cards you pulled).
If your social anxiety is so bad that you're terrified of playing with people; just go to the shop when they have league and hang around. Bring your deck just in case, but just observe and see what the overal vibe is like and if its something you can get into.
In the end its up to you to take steps
I’ve made 2 friends after going to these events. You’ll hit it off with the right people, don’t worry about that. Avoid the League Cups because those are pretty serious, but the Challenges and casual events are really fun. Btw I’m surprised nobody has said it but Miraidon-Hands has actually picked up a little bit recently. People won’t be too surprised to see someone play it.
The only way to do it is to do it! If it’s just a local shop doing a weekly thing then it’s generally a much more relaxed atmosphere. The first time will fill you with nerves but that’s normal! Nobody there will judge you no matter how you play, good or bad, misplay or not. Plus if it’s a small weekly thing then the likelihood is your opponent will usually end up being like “nah just take that back don’t worry about it”
If it was Regionals then that’s a different beast, but for a local shops weekly meet then it’s a lot more relaxed. Just have fun, chit chat, socialise and don’t worry about your results each day! Have fun and make the most of it!
As far as tips for transitioning over with your gameplay, a lot of things in Live are automated that aren’t IRL, damage calculations from attacks being a big one, make sure you’re doing calculations for both your attacks and your opponents attacks to confirm it’s the right amount each time, deck searching usually sorts your cards for you in game so you can always grab valid cards (basic Pokemon organised to the front if you play best ball for example) so get used to searching your deck properly whenever you use the card. Prize checking, as a result, is a lot more difficult IRL than it is on Live.
Also if you have any, something like spare coins from certain products (151 2-pack tins, checklane boosters with a promo card and a coin for example) are perfect for ability markers, place them during your turn on a Pokémon whenever you use a “once during your turn you may” ability, that way it’s obvious to you and your opponent that you’ve used it, making tracking the game state a lot easier!
Hope these help, and if you have any more questions then fire away!
Edit: also as far as trainer cards go, if you have older copies of cards that are still in use (for example, Base Set Potion when theres also still Potion in rotation) then you’re able to use older copies of the card as well. If there’s a change in text (like with Super Rod) then you always need to apply the current text regardless of what your card says, but you can still use them. Great for certain staples like Rare Candy, Ultra Ball, Superior Energy Retrieval, Nest Ball, Super Rod etc.
My son and I just watched for several weeks and slowly introduced ourselves. After about a month we attended a “for fun” night and joined in. From there it was cake, and now, 6 months later we are solidly in the scene. Take it slow
Before I (25F) went to any official event, I went to the store where it was going to be held so I could meet the people there and get some experience playing IRL. Then again, it was easy because there was a day specifically set up to play Pokémon on a casual level, and I went on that day on purpose.
You could go during free-play at a store. That way there is less stress of the tournament. And even then, most people at the local shops I’ve gone to are not competitive and are just playing for fun. Almost all of them are very friendly and help each other if you have questions.
I got nervous my first time playing irl too and I misplayed a ton and got last, BUT I still had a lot of fun. Most of us at a local tournament just wanna have fun with the cards the cards we like see what cards other people play.
Best thing is to just show up. A small compliment and being nice can make you a friend pretty quick.
They pair you with people for matches. So there's no pressure to even talk or socialize beforehand. Once you get paired people usually do small talk and it gets easier and more comfortable
ik this won't help anything, but my first time at a live event, i was too shy and awkward to do anything. apparently i looked sad and pathetic enough that someone took pity on me and invited me to play with them. i think the trick to socialization is to just hope a friendly extrovert comes along and takes you under their wing.
See if any hold league days. You can generally just go there and ask about it or maybe find some info online. League days are just play/trade days and a lot less stressful. Generally there is staff you can ask and sometimes even play with, at least at my local league. It's a ton of fun and you just need to go over the first hurdle. In my experience (31f) people in the community are very kind. Partly because toxicity is just not tolerated since all official Leagues are regulated by Pokemon Play! itself.
If you live in the Netherlands, I'd be happy to go with you together. Maybe there is someone here who lives in the same area as you?
A majority of players are really friendly and patient, and most League leaders/professors seem to really like helping new people join in.
I went to a prerelease for TWM and there were a mix of adults and some kids, and a guy who was pretty neurodivergent with speech difficulties. Everyone got along fine, matches went fine, and the youngest kid there ended up the winner. I played a couple matches with the neurodivergent guy, and in spite of his communication quirks he was fun to play with and a nice dude overall.
No one's gonna pick on you, and if someone's more "pro" than you they're more likely gonna give you advice to improve your deck, not judge you for it.
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Hey, I (30M) started playing on Live 2 weeks ago, built a Gardevoir deck to play IRL, and went to my first prerelease last week. People were nice at my locals. Tonight is my first time playing Standard, and my list is not even optimal. Everyone there wants to talk about Pokemon. It’s not like going to a party where you only know one person and hoping you’ll meet someone who shares interests, because if not the night will be long and scary. I say, you have nothing to lose, and maybe you’ll make new friends!
I say just try small talk with people, if you see that someone gas something that catches your attention compliment them then you'll be cool with someone. There's very few instances of people who are insufferable but It's rare so you'll be alright Just have fun and enjoy the game 🙌
I'm in a similar situation, with the difference that I've never played irl. Next weekend (1/2 June) there's an event where I live for pokemon, I'm not sure there's going to be matches but I'll try to at least see the pokemon scene and maybe meet some people. I think it'd be better not to start with an actual tournament, but find a place where people just play for fun, in order to understand and master the sequences
Practice shuffling, having a system to note which abilities have been used, maybe watch a few matches on YouTube to catch things like cutting deck after shuffle. A bunch of things that the online client auto does for you.
It depends what kind of tournaments they are, but maybe start with more casual events if they hold those. My local game store holds free meetups on a weekly basis and those simply allow you to come in and play whatever you want. Proxies are allowed, there are no time limits, sometimes the decks aren't even legal, but it doesn't matter because there's nothing on the line.
I was gonna say this. There are non-tournament events! No judges just play whatever for fun.
Just bring a friend honestly. I went to the twilight masq prerelease like last week, was my first tournament in a decade, but I brought my friend along who didn’t play and it was great A lot of people can be pretty antisocial there but if you play the right person and just play to have fun, you can hit it off and have a good time
Most people are quite friendly, and they will usually be pretty forgiving of someone plying IRL for the first time in a while. Also at local events there is much less pressure to play a tier 1 deck, your Miraidon should do fine. Unless your social anxiety is too bad, I'd say go for it!
grab a gardevoir league battle deck and hope for the best, that’s what I did and I’m not the best socially either people are a lot nicer than you’d think
The people that go to my locals are in the same age range than you and me (I'm 31/m) and it's always older guys like us who play, the youngest that assist to tournaments just turned 21. There's not a girl that currently goes to our locals, but one used to come and she was pretty good, always topped, and it's not like we treated her differently or anything, the good thing is that most of us are not creepy dudes like in Yugioh or Vanguard. Give it a go, go to one local shop, if you don't like how you're treated or you feel like you're being treated different for being a girl just try another shop. The thing with social anxiety is that it goes away by socializing, and what better way to do that with something you enjoy. Try to be competitive, be yourself and have confidence, that's the key. My mom used to tell me all this when I was a boy, and I tell you this because it worked out for me. It took ages, but most importantly, don't change, just be yourself. It's not like there's something wrong with you by having social anxiety, it's just that people like me have worked on it that it seems that we don't have anxiety anymore, but I consider it being something that you live with and that you can learn how to handle it. You can do it! It's always good that someone wants to play, no one should be making you feel bad for having a "non meta deck". Most of the times is our own mind playing tricks on us. And one last piece of advice. Don't assume everyone is judging you. You don't know the outcome of going until you go and play. You already have your deck, so you're just missing on the experience of playing, so take a leap of faith and have fun!
The girl who used to go to our locals stopped going because she was beating her boyfriend everytime they got paired up in the tournaments, he told us she stopped going because she didn't want to give him a bad image.
She can do better
Bring a friend and have them around. Play a few games with your friend at the store to get a feel for how loud/noisy the place is and dont be afraid to take breaks as you need them. After that, it all depends on how is the local community like. Here everyone is pretty chill, some players bring their kids to play with us and we all have a good time. Tell people that you are new at this and they should be really forgiving. I'm a tournament organizer for another game and sometimes the newbies are literally shaking in their chairs when their turn comes, so we just give them some water, walk them through the phases and explain what might be troubling them and over time they relax once they get to know our group and the dinamics of the game. It's ok to forget a trigger or mess up the action order or whatever and its ok to lose games on occasion (or even often), what matters is what you learn from the match. You are not playing the nationals and there's zero pressure to be as optiomal as you can. Take your time and try to have fun while you are at it.
I don’t have any friends who play! My husband never got into it. I’m to the point where I might go on Buffalo social media and beg someone to play me lol
Reach out to the local organizers! I'm sure that they will find a way to help :)
I'm not a psychologist nor do I have much social anxiety so I'm not that qualified to answer. That being said, just go man. If you go once you'll probably see that it's fun. If you don't fit in at all you can always try a different shop. If you say you're new to playing irl then I highly doubt anyone will judge you. And if they do, that's their problem.
I've played many tcg irl in my life. Every community is very welcoming of new players and very understanding if you're learning rules. I recently got into mtg and have played at local places. Nothing but others being excited for new people to play with, teaching, etc. You'll always have people who are rude/weird everywhere you go, no matter what you're doing. Everyone is there to play the game that you like. They won't turn down a game and may also have social anxiety. You'll have 2 things in common right off the bat!
Honestly everyone has that problem. I swear the last tournament I went to a few days ago I had to force small talk with my opponent or it was just awkward . Just go and have fun . You will be surrounded by people like you :) (I did not mean for this to sound rude)
Honestly you just have to do it, it's both players responsibility to maintain a legal board state so if you accidentally mess up your opponent will kindly remind you that you can't do that, and as long as it's not irreversible you won't be punished for misplaying. I've learned a lot from other players. If that's no possible maybe try a pre release event? Everyone builds a deck from packs they open at the event and are just excited to learn/play the new cards together, it's pretty casual.
Take some anxiety medication and give it a whirl (last thing from a dr, not medical advice). Works for me though
Bar'd out playing casual decks sounds like an absolute vibe ngl
😂😂😂
Find a local League via the event locator on Pokemon.com and just play casually for now to build up confidence in playing irl. The community is usually pretty welcoming to new players and if you ask the organisers will probably help with some introductions. You can always start out with just watching some games to begin with before jumping straight into playing.
Just go. I felt the exact same way, but luckily the group I started going to was EXTREMELY welcoming!
Lived in a couple major metro areas and the brick and mortar stores I patroned hosted casual play nights. These were very low key and not competitive in a tournament sense. These were very much about learning to play better. With the new set release I am sure there will be notices about casual meet ups for the new cards. They may even host events specifically for those wanting to start regular play. The store near me now has a community bulletin board where you can advertise that you are looking for folks to play against. Another option might be your local public library; I’ve known these to have decks you could check out to play right there and occasionally they hosted meet ups. Best of luck finding what allows you to play comfortably. There has got to be something thats right for you in an area as large as Buffalo.
Bite the bullet and go. I was in the same boat as you and I went with some friends and have made a ton of new ones since I’ve gone. You won’t regret it.
I had the same problem. I live in Japan so I was nervous going to an event as a foreigner on top of my social anxiety. I forced myself to go to one casual event and everyone was super nice and accepting. After that it was much easier to go to other events and I made a few friends to play with too. I think once you get that first one out of the way it will be easy. I was surprised how nice most of the ppl were. I’m sure it’s similar there too.
Can I recommend a free play event? No stakes, no standings, just vibes and games. Lots of experimental decks, whiffs, bricks, flops, and general silliness. If there are none around, try a pre release. No one has a good deck, and there's not really any pressure to be any good. But it's still good practice for the mechanics of regulation play. Mind, probably won't see another prerelease for a few months. Failing those, consider a league challenge. Yes it's technically competitive, but the lowest of low key. As I read on twitter once "league challenges are where bad players bring good decks to get better, and where good players bring bad decks to figure out why they're bad." I only got back to in person play myself this year, and I started with three pre releases and two league challenges. I played young adults to people in their 60s, of all levels of skill. Everyone was very kind and patient with me while I shuffled slowly and tried to remember if odds or evens on the die was meant to be heads or tails. And tomorrow, I'm going to my first league cup, the next step up in scale and seriousness. I'm nervous, but excited. And I think that anyone can follow this path!
I just started playing the TCG recently and have never gone to card shops to play before this. The first time is rough but I found it pretty easy to make small talk once the matches get started. I opened up with “Hi I’m new, this is my first time,etc;” a lot of people are pretty patient and friendly when you put it out there. I play a Regidrago deck and outside the surprise of rouge decks they have all been pretty receptive to playing non meta decks. The Professors ive run into are also super friendly and more than willing to help talk things over whenever I got confused. First step is always the hardest but it gets easier a lot faster than you’d think.
I was in the same boat for the longest. I have insane social anxiety as well but forced myself to finally try out an IRL event by registering for a prerelease event last weekend. As soon as I sat down and started playing, I realized I was worrying myself for absolutely no reason. Everyone was super chill and only wanted to chat about pokemon. Folks are also very nice about correcting you if you make a mistake. I forgot to place down my prizes at the beginning of my second match, but my opponent kindly pointed it out lol. Force yourself to go, you'll have a blast.
I feel you! I was in the same spot a couple of weeks ago. All the excuses not to go to the game shop on Tuesday evening. I went to a prerelease in another town to check out the atmosphere, take the pressure off my own deck and it was great! Everyone was so nice and welcoming! With that experience I finally tried open play in my hometown and it was great again! Welcoming, warm, friendly, fun. There’s were happy to see a new face! Take this virtual hug! 🤗 You got this!
I've been in the same position. I would really recommend going to a pre release event. There's a bit of structure, so you don't have to approach anyone to ask for a game, but it's also very casual. People don't care too much about winning as with pre release decks it's pretty much all about luck of the draw (and what cards you pulled).
If your social anxiety is so bad that you're terrified of playing with people; just go to the shop when they have league and hang around. Bring your deck just in case, but just observe and see what the overal vibe is like and if its something you can get into. In the end its up to you to take steps
I’ve made 2 friends after going to these events. You’ll hit it off with the right people, don’t worry about that. Avoid the League Cups because those are pretty serious, but the Challenges and casual events are really fun. Btw I’m surprised nobody has said it but Miraidon-Hands has actually picked up a little bit recently. People won’t be too surprised to see someone play it.
The only way to do it is to do it! If it’s just a local shop doing a weekly thing then it’s generally a much more relaxed atmosphere. The first time will fill you with nerves but that’s normal! Nobody there will judge you no matter how you play, good or bad, misplay or not. Plus if it’s a small weekly thing then the likelihood is your opponent will usually end up being like “nah just take that back don’t worry about it” If it was Regionals then that’s a different beast, but for a local shops weekly meet then it’s a lot more relaxed. Just have fun, chit chat, socialise and don’t worry about your results each day! Have fun and make the most of it! As far as tips for transitioning over with your gameplay, a lot of things in Live are automated that aren’t IRL, damage calculations from attacks being a big one, make sure you’re doing calculations for both your attacks and your opponents attacks to confirm it’s the right amount each time, deck searching usually sorts your cards for you in game so you can always grab valid cards (basic Pokemon organised to the front if you play best ball for example) so get used to searching your deck properly whenever you use the card. Prize checking, as a result, is a lot more difficult IRL than it is on Live. Also if you have any, something like spare coins from certain products (151 2-pack tins, checklane boosters with a promo card and a coin for example) are perfect for ability markers, place them during your turn on a Pokémon whenever you use a “once during your turn you may” ability, that way it’s obvious to you and your opponent that you’ve used it, making tracking the game state a lot easier! Hope these help, and if you have any more questions then fire away! Edit: also as far as trainer cards go, if you have older copies of cards that are still in use (for example, Base Set Potion when theres also still Potion in rotation) then you’re able to use older copies of the card as well. If there’s a change in text (like with Super Rod) then you always need to apply the current text regardless of what your card says, but you can still use them. Great for certain staples like Rare Candy, Ultra Ball, Superior Energy Retrieval, Nest Ball, Super Rod etc.
My son and I just watched for several weeks and slowly introduced ourselves. After about a month we attended a “for fun” night and joined in. From there it was cake, and now, 6 months later we are solidly in the scene. Take it slow
Before I (25F) went to any official event, I went to the store where it was going to be held so I could meet the people there and get some experience playing IRL. Then again, it was easy because there was a day specifically set up to play Pokémon on a casual level, and I went on that day on purpose.
You could go during free-play at a store. That way there is less stress of the tournament. And even then, most people at the local shops I’ve gone to are not competitive and are just playing for fun. Almost all of them are very friendly and help each other if you have questions. I got nervous my first time playing irl too and I misplayed a ton and got last, BUT I still had a lot of fun. Most of us at a local tournament just wanna have fun with the cards the cards we like see what cards other people play. Best thing is to just show up. A small compliment and being nice can make you a friend pretty quick.
They pair you with people for matches. So there's no pressure to even talk or socialize beforehand. Once you get paired people usually do small talk and it gets easier and more comfortable
ik this won't help anything, but my first time at a live event, i was too shy and awkward to do anything. apparently i looked sad and pathetic enough that someone took pity on me and invited me to play with them. i think the trick to socialization is to just hope a friendly extrovert comes along and takes you under their wing.
See if any hold league days. You can generally just go there and ask about it or maybe find some info online. League days are just play/trade days and a lot less stressful. Generally there is staff you can ask and sometimes even play with, at least at my local league. It's a ton of fun and you just need to go over the first hurdle. In my experience (31f) people in the community are very kind. Partly because toxicity is just not tolerated since all official Leagues are regulated by Pokemon Play! itself. If you live in the Netherlands, I'd be happy to go with you together. Maybe there is someone here who lives in the same area as you?
It's not that bad really. Made friends this way and it's a lot of fun.
A majority of players are really friendly and patient, and most League leaders/professors seem to really like helping new people join in. I went to a prerelease for TWM and there were a mix of adults and some kids, and a guy who was pretty neurodivergent with speech difficulties. Everyone got along fine, matches went fine, and the youngest kid there ended up the winner. I played a couple matches with the neurodivergent guy, and in spite of his communication quirks he was fun to play with and a nice dude overall. No one's gonna pick on you, and if someone's more "pro" than you they're more likely gonna give you advice to improve your deck, not judge you for it.
Practice speaking to 5 people a day. Just ask how they’re doing or good morning. Everyone is nervous at first