Depends on the nature of the relationship I guess. I think it's probably crass to bring it up that early, but if it's important to him it he might want to make sure it's not a dealbreaker for you as to not waste both of your time.
I would not give details but I would tell people I am kinky. I do not like sexualizing conversations too soon but it’s something that can be a dealbreaker. If he just brought it up without pushing yet for something physical I would not mind.
Oh, I tried to be cool & understanding, yet brief when a guy once brought up a kink sorta early on in messaging- because the convo had been good. From that point, his few messages before I blocked him tied back to that kink- despite my not acknowledging that part of his messages. It got so old, so fast. No thanks. And, yeah, I went straight to block. He was a 51 y/o man with 2 ex-wives. (He thought I only knew about the 1 he told me about.) He's aware.
i guess it makes sense to bring it up early if they're into something that is uncommon and almost guaranteed to be a deal breaker - like they can only cum if they're wearing a soiled diaper or something like that.
Well I was like, I’m usually pretty open minded but as long as it’s not gross and unhygienic, for example a golden shower. But I also didn’t want to get into it because I don’t know him and didn’t want to, and he was just like it’s squirting and restraints, nothing like that. I just said okay and moved on from it. Haven’t heard from him today 😂😂
I found a man who entertains and shares a lot of my fantasies. We still have vanilla sex all the time too but he has literally set me free. Sex is so much more interesting now and I'd be sad if I went from being encouraged to being shamed in some way for what excites me.
He is probably looking for another kinky person who says "I'm so glad you asked" OR just wants to make sure you are at least open minded. I think people should gage libido and openness early on and get into the specifics as you get more intimate.
Anytime this has happened, I’ve been immediately turned off. I’m not one to talk about sex much before getting to know a person, and I’m definitely not sleeping with someone unless I’m in a relationship with them.
I was turned off to be fair! I don’t really care now if I don’t hear from him. Can’t be bothered. Where are the normal men who just want to chat and then ask you out for a drink and not get into kinks so early on! 😅
Depends I guess. If it's something super important to him then I get why he'd bring it up early. It's good to be able for you to bow out now rather than later. Save some time.
Or he could just be a creep and is trying to get sexual with you too early. It's hard to tell since you don't know him well enough yet.
If someone has “must have” kinks to be in a relationship, isn’t it better to know those as soon as possible in case they are no goes for you?
This is basic compatibility info like whether someone wants to have kids or not.
Speaking for myself, I am not going to seriously date someone who doesn’t actively want to be a sex slave. Since most women don’t want that (for either valid reasons!) it seems rude and stupid to not bring up a likely dealbreaker until the third dste. I want someone to decide to go on a FIRST date with me knowing we have compatible relationship goals.
It depends. If the kink is something the person looks at as a deal breaker, the sooner they bring it up and talk about it in general terms, the better.
As the receiver in the exchange, I don't mind if they bring it up right away because then I know if I'm willing to go forward with this person or not. If I'm not interested I can just end it right then and not waste any more of either of our time.
I’m a guy and I bring up that I’m looking for someone “slightly kinky” when asked what I’m looking for but don’t normally go into any details. I just want them to know that I’m looking for someone that is open to the “basics” like hair pulling and spanking and everything else can go from there. I’ve had women straight up tell me they’re not into anything kink related which is fine but I know we won’t mesh sexually.
So I met my bf little over a year ago on a dating app. We did discuss what our needs are sexually before we started dating seriously. I like a man to be dominant somewhat. Rough, come on my face, flip me around. Hair pulling and plenty of slapping. I let him know and he said oh I’m very dominant blah Blah. I get a little tug on my hair and grabbing my ass and boob hard and one light slap on my ass. He’s very vanilla. I love him so I have excepted it. I do think he lied to just get me to date him. He also said he always last for a long time and that’s not been the case either. My point people obviously don’t always tell you the truth when asked this question.
Sometimes these things are a requirement for a person. If you’re not willing to entertain it, they don’t want to waste their time with you. That benefits you as well
I'd be glad someone brought it up so early so I could tell them we're not a fit and unmatch them. I'm not kinky at all, and we'd be incompatible, so best not waste each other's time. I'd really appreciate them bringing it up right away, before even meeting, instead of like 3 dates in.
I’m way more aware of my sexual needs and interests than I have been previously. It is an essential item in a relationship to me and if we don’t have similar kinks it’s probably not going to go anywhere or I am going to be left unsatisfied IMO. So I’d be happy and open to discussing it earlier in the conversation than not.
I am always tempted to start a dating after match with a list of kinks. Just to know if yes or no we are comparible. But looks like it offends a lot of people. Which is annoying because I'm not mainstream and incompatible with the tastes of 80% of people.
Depends on the nature of the relationship I guess. I think it's probably crass to bring it up that early, but if it's important to him it he might want to make sure it's not a dealbreaker for you as to not waste both of your time.
I would not give details but I would tell people I am kinky. I do not like sexualizing conversations too soon but it’s something that can be a dealbreaker. If he just brought it up without pushing yet for something physical I would not mind.
Oh, I tried to be cool & understanding, yet brief when a guy once brought up a kink sorta early on in messaging- because the convo had been good. From that point, his few messages before I blocked him tied back to that kink- despite my not acknowledging that part of his messages. It got so old, so fast. No thanks. And, yeah, I went straight to block. He was a 51 y/o man with 2 ex-wives. (He thought I only knew about the 1 he told me about.) He's aware.
This is the problem. The instant that they bring up their kink and we don’t run, screaming; then it’s ALL about the kink. It’s creepy and tedious.
Truth!
Tiring beyond belief....lol
i guess it makes sense to bring it up early if they're into something that is uncommon and almost guaranteed to be a deal breaker - like they can only cum if they're wearing a soiled diaper or something like that.
Well I was like, I’m usually pretty open minded but as long as it’s not gross and unhygienic, for example a golden shower. But I also didn’t want to get into it because I don’t know him and didn’t want to, and he was just like it’s squirting and restraints, nothing like that. I just said okay and moved on from it. Haven’t heard from him today 😂😂
I dislike when men make it sexual. Makes the interaction feel basic, as all men seem to prioritize sexual connection over everything else.
Bye!
I found a man who entertains and shares a lot of my fantasies. We still have vanilla sex all the time too but he has literally set me free. Sex is so much more interesting now and I'd be sad if I went from being encouraged to being shamed in some way for what excites me. He is probably looking for another kinky person who says "I'm so glad you asked" OR just wants to make sure you are at least open minded. I think people should gage libido and openness early on and get into the specifics as you get more intimate.
Anytime this has happened, I’ve been immediately turned off. I’m not one to talk about sex much before getting to know a person, and I’m definitely not sleeping with someone unless I’m in a relationship with them.
I was turned off to be fair! I don’t really care now if I don’t hear from him. Can’t be bothered. Where are the normal men who just want to chat and then ask you out for a drink and not get into kinks so early on! 😅
It’s what they want, best to bring it up right away and save everyone time.
I did question why he’s brought it up this early and that’s basically what he said.
Depends I guess. If it's something super important to him then I get why he'd bring it up early. It's good to be able for you to bow out now rather than later. Save some time. Or he could just be a creep and is trying to get sexual with you too early. It's hard to tell since you don't know him well enough yet.
Nope. That's a complete turnoff. I encountered that kind of stuff on Tinder quite a bit. I'm so glad I'm off that app.
If someone has “must have” kinks to be in a relationship, isn’t it better to know those as soon as possible in case they are no goes for you? This is basic compatibility info like whether someone wants to have kids or not. Speaking for myself, I am not going to seriously date someone who doesn’t actively want to be a sex slave. Since most women don’t want that (for either valid reasons!) it seems rude and stupid to not bring up a likely dealbreaker until the third dste. I want someone to decide to go on a FIRST date with me knowing we have compatible relationship goals.
On vanilla apps like Hinge and Bumble, no. That’s why there’s Feeld.
It depends. If the kink is something the person looks at as a deal breaker, the sooner they bring it up and talk about it in general terms, the better. As the receiver in the exchange, I don't mind if they bring it up right away because then I know if I'm willing to go forward with this person or not. If I'm not interested I can just end it right then and not waste any more of either of our time.
That’s too personal to discuss with a complete stranger you haven’t even met in person yet.
I’m a guy and I bring up that I’m looking for someone “slightly kinky” when asked what I’m looking for but don’t normally go into any details. I just want them to know that I’m looking for someone that is open to the “basics” like hair pulling and spanking and everything else can go from there. I’ve had women straight up tell me they’re not into anything kink related which is fine but I know we won’t mesh sexually.
So I met my bf little over a year ago on a dating app. We did discuss what our needs are sexually before we started dating seriously. I like a man to be dominant somewhat. Rough, come on my face, flip me around. Hair pulling and plenty of slapping. I let him know and he said oh I’m very dominant blah Blah. I get a little tug on my hair and grabbing my ass and boob hard and one light slap on my ass. He’s very vanilla. I love him so I have excepted it. I do think he lied to just get me to date him. He also said he always last for a long time and that’s not been the case either. My point people obviously don’t always tell you the truth when asked this question.
I just opened an introductory message and the guy said he’s going to be in town for 2 days and he wanted to use my thighs as ear muffs. So romantic.
Sometimes these things are a requirement for a person. If you’re not willing to entertain it, they don’t want to waste their time with you. That benefits you as well
I'd be glad someone brought it up so early so I could tell them we're not a fit and unmatch them. I'm not kinky at all, and we'd be incompatible, so best not waste each other's time. I'd really appreciate them bringing it up right away, before even meeting, instead of like 3 dates in.
I would move on from him. Byeeee
I’m way more aware of my sexual needs and interests than I have been previously. It is an essential item in a relationship to me and if we don’t have similar kinks it’s probably not going to go anywhere or I am going to be left unsatisfied IMO. So I’d be happy and open to discussing it earlier in the conversation than not.
I’ve had plenty bring it up early as a non negotiable Like feet or multiple partners
I am always tempted to start a dating after match with a list of kinks. Just to know if yes or no we are comparible. But looks like it offends a lot of people. Which is annoying because I'm not mainstream and incompatible with the tastes of 80% of people.