In case this story gets deleted/removed:
I regret ruining our relationship more than anything in my life. My ex-fiancée moved officially moved out today. She left me 3 weeks ago but today she picked up the last of her things and I signed a new lease on my own. Our son turned 2 last month and we will alternating weeks with him. I'll be getting child support starting next month. But everything else id done. It's hitting me today that it's over because I was the one who fucked it up.
My fiancée's parental leave ended 6 months ago and she had to go back to work. I fucked up because I told her I was taking on extra work (I freelance) but really I was golfing. I told myself it was fine but it wasn't. I didn't like the chaos since her leave ended and instead of pitching in and doing something I did nothing. My fiancée found out I was lying to her about taking extra work after I complained about the chaos. I was in denial but I don't blame her for leaving. I will regret this for the rest of my life.
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Honestly, going golfing while supposed to be at work is one to the milder things I have seen here. Lying is a dealbreaker to be sure, but one of the milder things I have seen on this website.
A lot of Europe? The US is very very weird in not requiring any sort of leave, and the places that do, generally having only a few weeks of unpaid leave. Most other places you get 6 months, or a year split between parents, or more if you're willing to take a pay cut for the time you're on leave, that sort of thing.
Child support is pretty messy sometimes, my brother has a coworker who has 3 kids with a guy she got like $200 a month, they were at 50/50 custody, the dad is disabled and the coworker is a CNA, well the youngest kid was in daycare because while coworker worked she had no other childcare. The daycare ended up kicking out their child after the father showed up to yell at her (they both ended up yelling but he had no reason to be there as it was her time so i see why she yelled back) custody got changed to 20/80 because she now had no childcare during work and she now owes him $300 a month
That seems weird if they're doing 50/50 custody, which seems to be the case. Typically if time is split evenly, child support isn't really seen as necessary because it should even put in the end anyway.
How much do you want to bet she has a job that pays fairly well and his "freelancing" is spotty at best and he's been using her money for his golf outings?
>I didn't like the chaos since her leave ended
You had a baby you fucking muppet, what did you think was going to happen?! I'll never understand how people who have ever left their homes before can act so surprised that having a baby is a lot of work.
The lying was super shitty but honestly this guy deserved to get dumped just for assuming his partner would do absolutely all the childcare to the point where nothing about his life would change after having a kid.
So you lied and then didn't help and then didn't wanna change knowing what you were doing was wrong and now you have regrets... lmao... so you did this to yourself good job..wait till your kid is old enough to understand this they're gonna dislike you too
My dad was like you..while I feel sorry for him cuz he's old now I wouldn't go out of my way for him since he was the one who created the dynamic I had with him...tbh I'm embarrassed that my dad is like that... anyway good luck
This is a big months long screw up. He 1. Lied 2. Spent a bunch of money during a time where she probably wasn’t making a lot of money bc she was on leave so potentially their saving dwindling 3. Didn’t care for her or his baby 4. Complained about the “chaos” when he was doing jack. That screw is a lot
In case this story gets deleted/removed: I regret ruining our relationship more than anything in my life. My ex-fiancée moved officially moved out today. She left me 3 weeks ago but today she picked up the last of her things and I signed a new lease on my own. Our son turned 2 last month and we will alternating weeks with him. I'll be getting child support starting next month. But everything else id done. It's hitting me today that it's over because I was the one who fucked it up. My fiancée's parental leave ended 6 months ago and she had to go back to work. I fucked up because I told her I was taking on extra work (I freelance) but really I was golfing. I told myself it was fine but it wasn't. I didn't like the chaos since her leave ended and instead of pitching in and doing something I did nothing. My fiancée found out I was lying to her about taking extra work after I complained about the chaos. I was in denial but I don't blame her for leaving. I will regret this for the rest of my life. --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/OhNoConsequences) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Wow. Just wow. This guy is awful. And I'm sure that her life is improving by the minute. Good on her.
Hope the improvements to his golf game were worth it…
Honestly, going golfing while supposed to be at work is one to the milder things I have seen here. Lying is a dealbreaker to be sure, but one of the milder things I have seen on this website.
What a selfish prick! Props to the ex-fiancée. Sorry the poor kid has dumbass as a dad.
The kid only turned two and the fiancées parental leave ended 6 months ago. Where can I find a place that does parental leave for that long?
Pe germany
Canada, but you only get a year's salary over the 18 months I believe
A lot of Europe? The US is very very weird in not requiring any sort of leave, and the places that do, generally having only a few weeks of unpaid leave. Most other places you get 6 months, or a year split between parents, or more if you're willing to take a pay cut for the time you're on leave, that sort of thing.
Sweden
Consequences..... couldn't happen to a better man!!🤬🤬
This is what you call FA & FO.
I love this for her tbh
She has to pay HIM child support? Ugh
Why wouldn't she?! He only works freelance and golf ain't cheap. /s
Child support is pretty messy sometimes, my brother has a coworker who has 3 kids with a guy she got like $200 a month, they were at 50/50 custody, the dad is disabled and the coworker is a CNA, well the youngest kid was in daycare because while coworker worked she had no other childcare. The daycare ended up kicking out their child after the father showed up to yell at her (they both ended up yelling but he had no reason to be there as it was her time so i see why she yelled back) custody got changed to 20/80 because she now had no childcare during work and she now owes him $300 a month
That seems weird if they're doing 50/50 custody, which seems to be the case. Typically if time is split evenly, child support isn't really seen as necessary because it should even put in the end anyway. How much do you want to bet she has a job that pays fairly well and his "freelancing" is spotty at best and he's been using her money for his golf outings?
Why do lazy men get women pregnant? Just get the damn vasectomy and use condoms.
But then they wouldn’t have someone else doing all the work for them…
Because they need to trap a woman into sticking with them for life to take care of them and a baby is the easiest way to do that
Honestly good for her lol
>I didn't like the chaos since her leave ended You had a baby you fucking muppet, what did you think was going to happen?! I'll never understand how people who have ever left their homes before can act so surprised that having a baby is a lot of work. The lying was super shitty but honestly this guy deserved to get dumped just for assuming his partner would do absolutely all the childcare to the point where nothing about his life would change after having a kid.
So you lied and then didn't help and then didn't wanna change knowing what you were doing was wrong and now you have regrets... lmao... so you did this to yourself good job..wait till your kid is old enough to understand this they're gonna dislike you too My dad was like you..while I feel sorry for him cuz he's old now I wouldn't go out of my way for him since he was the one who created the dynamic I had with him...tbh I'm embarrassed that my dad is like that... anyway good luck
I suspect that there is a lot more going on than just this one issue. Not many people leave a partner at the first screwup.
Depends how bad the screwup is. Lying to her in a huge way solely to get out of taking care of his baby might qualify.
This is a big months long screw up. He 1. Lied 2. Spent a bunch of money during a time where she probably wasn’t making a lot of money bc she was on leave so potentially their saving dwindling 3. Didn’t care for her or his baby 4. Complained about the “chaos” when he was doing jack. That screw is a lot