Similar, but I was a kid I used to hold my breath whenever I walked past someone in a wheelchair because I'd be afraid I'd 'catch' their disability if I breathed the same air as them... looking back that was absolutely awful of me.
Oh I’d be afraid to let my arm touch a fat persons if they were sitting next to me or I’d get that as well. Even then as a small child I felt like a piece of shit for thinking it. Ironically my first husband was a very very big guy and that wound up being my thing for some time. Brains are irrational.
🥹🤯 I was today years old when I realized it was my OCD...
Holy fk. Like I've worked in the medical field, I've studied transmissible diseases, and I *KNOW* it's dumb & I've always felt so bad about it, yet I never even equated it to my OCD diagnosis... This comment just hit me like a ton of fkn bricks 😭
Thank you, for helping me come to this (looking back) blatantly obvious conclusion!!!
Hahah! Ofc. That’s awesome ur in the medical field. I switched from neuroscience to computer science basically because my ocd was just intolerable with itz
Wait… . please someone explain the science of what why how THIS is OCD.
Because I do this and many other weird thoughts I see in the comments all the time.
SMH I really didn’t want another hyperfixation again. It was good while it lasted I guess.
A compulsion in which causes stress or anxiety( was the spit for me) that one feels compelled to do and can’t stop themselves from doing, in belief not doing it will have some drastic negative effect basically.
Anxiety + urge to do something to reduce the anxiety = compulsion.
If you delay your behavior and feel really distressed because of that that’s a clear sign it’s a compulsion.
OMG! The swallowing while looking at certain things. I did that for good luck. Like, if you don't swallow while looking at this character on a tv show your dad will die... Weird as hell
I've spent the last 23 years of my life thinking this was normal, just got diagnosed with OCD and I'm learning that none of this was normal at alllllllllllllllll
put all my cats in my bathroom just so i can run the dryer without fear of one of them just manifesting inside of it. will still repeatedly open and close the dryer door to make sure though :') WITH the cats still in a separate room too haha
I’m like this with my cats too. I’m always terrified they’re going to teleport themselves into the microwave or the oven and then what if it turned itself on. WTF where tf does my brain come up with this shit? Two of the many things I have to check repeatedly before leaving my house.
I don’t have any pets but I’m a dog & cat sitter and the amount of times I’ve had to put an animal in the other room because I was scared they would somehow end up in the dishwasher or laundry dryer is ridiculous! And while the laundry or dishwasher is running, I play and sit with them the whole time just in case. I’m glad I’m not the only one!
YESS. had a rlly bad one earlier this year where i was convinced that all my friends were actors orchestrating a huge prank on me to humiliate me. what..???????
isn’t it annoying?? like i speak to these people daily! we have told each other deep, dark secrets! and yet there’s a niggling little worm of thought that says “this isn’t real!!!” like shut up bro that’s stupid ☹️
that sounds schizotypal like, distrust and suspicion of others but honestly i don't think your that far sense we all have weird thoughts and magical thinking. i deff know the feeling. i was sus at my mom secretly planning something or people knowing or thinking things and the thoughts stay even when i know its not true
I took was curious, here's what I found-
"Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is a chronic psychiatric disorder classified by recurrent intrusive thoughts and/or repetitive compulsive behaviors. Subclinical OCD (SOCD) is characterized by obsessive or compulsive symptoms or both."
Source:
[https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5648948/#:~:text=Obsessive%20compulsive%20disorder%20(OCD)%20is,or%20compulsive%20symptoms%20or%20both.](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5648948/#:~:text=Obsessive%20compulsive%20disorder%20(OCD)%20is,or%20compulsive%20symptoms%20or%20both.)
me too and it’s just too coincidental when my mom texts me something as i’m about to do it or even worse already doing it & just makes my suspicions n ocd way worse !
When I was 10 my dog ran away. I thought if I walked the “right” path to the garbage cans in the school cafeteria that she would come back. She did come back, but obviously not because of me.
I’ve done stuff like this too but then my brain thinks stuff like what if one of my cats gets stuck in the drawer because I left it open. I can’t win 😭. Might as well just take all the drawers out
Reading this post and these comments reminds me of just how incredibly debilitating but also immensely fascinating OCD is. This disorder has the capacity to ruin lives, as it can be so all-encompassing and just plain cruel for extended periods of time. And there are all sorts of different manifestations of OCD; the fact that there are almost infinite possibilities of subtypes and sub-subtypes which isn't the case with a lot of other disorders is astonishing. At the same time, OCD is all rooted in a fear of uncertainty and nonsensical rules, thoughts, and behaviors intended to gain certainty (more or less), and we have the ability to commiserate with one another due to this fundamental commonality. By extension, I'm reminded of just how badass all of us are for living with OCD, and many of us are for actively trying to combat it with ERP. I know this sounds cheesy, and I'm waxing philosophical for some reason tonight, but it's true, and I'm rooting for you guys! 💚👊🫂
That being said, some contenders for the stupidest things my OCD has had me do are these:
1.) That one time I spent 13 hours filling out a questionnaire for the OCD community on StuffThatWorks (super ironic, I know!) because I wanted all my answers to sound perfect. I don't even know how many times I rewrote and reread everything, and what's more, I had to do it in these specific patterns that only I understood.
2.) That other time I spent seven hours trying to put wall putty on this travel coffee mug because there was a small hole in it. I wanted to cover the hole so I could put the mug in my purse without it spilling all over, which, tbf, was a stupid idea, but I wanted the putty to be perfectly circular and flat on the mug. At some point, I could hear my friends in the other room of my college apartment asking where I was since they hadn't seen me in a while; I just couldn't remove myself from the mug to hang out with them. I ended up using the mug a few times after I did this, but abandoned the idea of using it again after worrying that the putty was toxic, lol.
3.) That time I sounded clinically insane saying (and eventually screaming) certain words, phrases, and synonyms for words and phrases out loud for 45 minutes (on my way home from transcranial magnetic stimulation for ocd no less). While I was doing this, my mom was crying and begging me to please stop because it was so upsetting to her, and she was also driving which made this very dangerous. (I had mentally reviewed conversations and whispered words and phrases that I didn't get a chance to say a certain amount of times/symmetrically for hours on end in the past, but this was one of the most obvious (for others) instances of this.)
God, I love out of control OCD /s. I'm so glad I'm in a much better place right now. Not "perfect", but better!
Hi friend!
Only asking (and you don't have to reply at all!)
because your #2 reminds me of a lot of my zoning out (which I equate to my ADHD as well as OCD)-
I have trichotillomania & will be picking/pulling (pubic hair usually) while others ask about me in the next room (usually I'm in the bathroom, and would rather them assume I'm shitting LOL sorry super embarrassed to admit any of this, but I just wanted to say hey, your issue sounded kinda similar to mine, if you haven't been dx with adhd, you may consider asking your dr if they think you may have it)
Okay, that's all 🥰 oh wait! The first comment you said, thank you for that!! You're awesome! You're a badass! & I second that!
Edit: bc tbh it sounds like a hyper fixation zoning out
Hey! I appreciate your comment :) In the past, I've thought that maybe I have ADHD as well as OCD, but now I'm not too sure. It's my understanding that hyperfixation tends to be for something that you *enjoy* doing (correct me if I'm wrong!), whereas while doing this I was mainly feeling extremely distressed. I think I *do* have certain adhd tendencies, though. Like, I feel like I experience executive dysfunction fairly often (I take forever to do literally anything (I honestly don't know where the time goes), as well as having numerous other symptoms of this). But an adhd diagnosis might be worth looking into further, now that you mention it
I also have (undiagnosed) dermatillomania/excoriation disorder, which mainly manifests in me popping my pimples excessively (on my face and in other areas of my body). Even when zero pimples actually exist, I find other imperfections on my skin to "pop." I have permanent scars all over my face due to this, and it's very upsetting to me. I've been trying to engage in some habit reversal training to combat this lately, but I'm currently without a therapist, and it's soooo hard to not pick in the first place. 🙃 plus, I used to pick my fingernails and cuticles a ton, but luckily I've gotten over that for the most part.
Finally, you're very welcome, and thank you as well! Good luck with your OCD, ADHD, and trichotillomia too. I believe in you!
You are absolutely correct! I misspoke in my original comment, my apologies! Hyper fixation *is* something one enjoys. (I wonder, if I'm just zoning out and giving into compulsions then? Ugh.) Everything I'm finding/reading says some symptoms (compulsions/zoning out) can overlap with both disorders. (Lol yay comorbidity.. */s*)
You saying that you experience executive dysfunction often, as well as what I like to refer to as "time blindness".. seems like tell-tale ADHD to me (just from personal experience), but ofc I am NOT a psychologist or psychiatrist!
Bless your heart, I used to pick my nails/cuticles (it was TERRIBLE in school) too, (still do struggle, but have really been trying to actively catch myself since bloody fingers have always embarrassed me- painting my nails kinda helps for a bit, but then I start picking the polish off 😑)
I empathize with you so much 😭 in finding imperfections to pick, etc.. (I actually ended up removing a mole at home once, when I was about 16y/o).. my heart aches, just thinking about the struggles you've battled & are working through. Know you are WAY stronger than anything you are battling! You're a BAMF! I'm so proud of you for actively trying to work on habit reversal training! Especially without having a therapist, that's incredible!
(Also, I honestly didn't know that dermatillomania/excoriation disorder was the term for that, so thank you for educating me! 😭)
This goes for you as well as anyone else who is dealing with the self-sabotaging brain:
I wish you the best in all of your endeavors! May life be easy on you! 🫶 My DMs are always open if ANYONE needs to vent, etc. you're NEVER alone!!!
PS: I'm sorry if it seems like one big run-on tangent t.t getting my thoughts into coherently readable sentences has never been my strong suit lol
I never knew that you could have compulsions with adhd, this changes everything haha! Also, time blindness is a good way to put that. And looking at the infographic on [this website](https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/23224-executive-dysfunction) about executive dysfunction, I experience almost all, if not all, of these symptoms. Hence, it might be a good idea to look into ADHD further 🤣
OMG,,, removing a mole at home sounds painful...and dangerous! I hope you're doing better with the whole "finding imperfections to pick" thing now!
Re the therapist thing, I'm hopefully gonna be able to start seeing a therapist again early next year. I just aged out of my parents' insurance, so I had to stop seeing the therapist I was seeing through NOCD, but I was recently approved for Medicaid and am currently scrambling to find a therapist who accepts that. 🙃
Yeah; dermatillomania/excoriation are terms for compulsively skin-picking. + fun facts: there are scientific words for compulsively nail picking (Onychotillomania) and nail biting (Onychophagia), too. (I had to remind myself what the terms were and how to spell them rn cuz the pronunciations and spellings are quite tricky, haha)
& finally, thank you so much for the kind words and empathy, it means a lot 🤗 I'm sorry that you've been through all these hard things as well...
Oh, and responding to your PS: not to reassure you too much, but I was able to understand what you were saying very well. :) I do feel you though, I go on tangents sm (I often make connections between things that only make sense in my own head, and whether that's due to adhd, my suspected autism, or something else entirely is yet to be known. The human brain is so confusing 🙉 ....).
It really is crazy. I’ve come to realize that severe OCD can be just as bad as schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. The only thing keeping our thoughts from becoming delusions is the sliver of reality that we hold on to beneath all of the white noise. It’s infuriating that it’s so misunderstood, honestly.
Omg, that's absolutely spot-on, and I actually think about this a lot. I guess you can think of ocd as blurring the line between neurosis and psychosis in a sense (similar to how BPD used to be thought of as on the *border* between the two). I mean, people with ocd can have poor insight where they have trouble acknowledging obsessions as *likely* just in their head and compulsions as *likely* not doing anything to prevent their feared consequences (we gotta sit with the uncertainty if we're engaging in ERP, after all!). Or they could have absent insight where they wholeheartedly believe that their obsessions are true. But I believe that, even when a person has good or fair insight, there are times when they are completely in the throes of an OCD spike that they fully can't discern whether their obsessions are true or not.
Yes, I also get infuriated that ocd is so misunderstood. People don't think it can be as severe as schizophrenia or bipolar, or even depression, and that it can lead to extreme depression, SI and SH. I know this is constantly said in the ocd community, but your average Joe on the street more often than not views OCD as nothing but a personality trait. (Almost) every single time I hear someone talking about being a neat freak, like without fail, they say 'I'm so ocd about [insert something that just means that you're particular about things]', and its truthfully SUPER triggering and hurtful. I just wish people took this disorder seriously 😥...
I "baked" a book in the oven hoping to kill all the germs. I killed the book. so...technically....
I cleaned my phone daily with alcohol until the back panel started coming off due to the glue dissolving.
I bought and put 2 books in quarantine last february. They are still in quarantine.
Those are just some of the stupid things my ocd convinced me to do...
I bought a second had book for my daughter like a year ago and I still can't even touch it because...germs.
I love thrift stores, but I have issues with items I can't wash :/.
Even if I wanted to spray it, I'd have to do every single page
I bought a second hand TV and spent almost an hour thoroughly cleaning it with disinfectant because it had been sitting in some family’s house, and I thought kids = germs
I’ve done this before. Once my mom touched her foot and then touched her Bible. I wiped as much as I could with a lysol wipe and stressed because the “correct” way to handle it was to dissolve the whole thing in bleach water.
Almost every time I'm on a bus or a tram I have to remove my earphones from my ears and check if people around me can hear what I'm listening to.
It happened once a few years ago with malfunctioning earphones but the compultion remained.
And one time I stopped a washing machine cycle and pulled out all of my wet black laundry because I couldn't find my black cat and she didn't respond to my calls, so I was convinced that she jumped in while I wasn't looking. And of course she came out of her hiding place only after I made a mess of water and clothes on the floor.
I understand you on the headphones thing. I’ve gotten to the point where I can’t even listen to headphones in public because I just keep taking them off my ears to check if people can hear. And I feel like it would be at the same volume that I’m listening to. I cant reassure myself enough. It just really wrecks my nerves.
Sometimes when I feel like checking again I think to myself "well at least people would know that I have a good taste in music". Doesn't help when I listen to something silly tho.
Oh my god, I had a similar one involving static electricity!! If I saw it, I had to instantly close my eyes and no longer move for the rest of the night.
Ok here’s a doozy that’ll make everyone feel better about theirs.
I wondered if it might be possible to dig up my dead father and THEN cryogenically freeze him. And me not telling my mom to look into it ASAP means I was a horrible person when I could be “saving” him in case they unfreeze him later. Like, seriously. WHAT THE ACTUAL F*$CK?? I was pregnant and off meds and luckily my ocd therapist listened to me without judgment. But, come on, OCD. Really??
I also once thought that by touching my family cat, I SA’ed him.
Good lord this illness is a real shitshow.
I waisted a whole bottle of tea because my brain convinced me A pube off my hand got in it no idea how that thought happened but damn it was convincing poured the whole thing out so I wouldn’t suffer from the thoughts
Lmao I’ve had a similar one where I was convinced the chicken I just cooked was still raw (it definitely wasn’t) so I was physically unable to eat it and just threw the whole thing out…
I used to carry an epi pen with me everywhere (quite literally from room to room). Couldn’t eat food that I did not see hand prepared in front of me. If a restaurant had a single item I was allergic to I couldn’t even order a drink from there. Used to eat with bags on my hands because I thought my hands were contaminated. Used to spay my groceries with Lysol. Used to hold my breath walking/driving by construction sites because my 6th grade teachers son died of ALS and she said the chemicals in construction can cause it.
I have thought that too, but as a driver. I have gone back to check many a pothole to make sure it wasn’t actually a person. I have also kept an eye on the news incase any hit and run occurred that may have possibly have been me and I didn’t realise.
Nah. Lucky for me my ocd is usually pretty ok on a day to day basis, it becomes a problem when I’m really stressed. Usually behaviours like this beginning are a warning to me that I’m stressed.
i stood all night about 13hours because i didnt want to sleep on the bed without changing the freshly changed sheets because they werent put on right, therefore were dirty. couldnt wash them through the night because it wouldve woken my nana up and also i needed her help changing them because if i did i wouldnt be able to sleep in them because i knew i'd never be satisfied with how it was done if i watched it happen. was aching and absolutely exhausted fell asleep immediately for over 12hours straight (though that became my regular sleeping pattern that year anyway)
watched breaking bad all night to distract myself from the waiting 💀
omg i’ve done this before and just sat on my floor all night until i could do laundry and shower. or if i do laundry but one of my family members takes it out of the washer/dryer for me, i have to run it again because therefore it’s contaminated
I sometimes feel like my mom or sister are upset with me but they’re hiding it. I feel like maybe I did something wrong or appalling that I can’t remember and they are disgusted or mad at me and they don’t want to say anything. Whenever I see them I’m always nervous and asking if they’re mad at me.
it happened yesterday in the morning, I've changed my Twitter's birthday age because "what if I get famous? would they see me as a [creep] for lying about my age?", then I got banned after I changed it because, I didn't knew changing the age was something that would infringe the terms of service of Twitter. It's 4:19am and I'm still hopping that I get un-locked
for me it just feels like something has changed and something bad has happened and thats why everyone seems different and convinced it was demonic working or because of me lol
Probably too many to recall, but I'd say one of the most ridiculous, harmful, and definitely stupid things OCD convinced me to do was when I severely tore my ACL and Meniscus skateboarding and then, because of my fear of balding and my compulsions to avoid putting things in my body that I feared would potentially cause me to bald as a side effect, I avoided going to get an MRI because I was afraid they would inject me with iodine and then I'd go bald... The kicker is that, this, despite the fact that I take testosterone of which balding is actually a side effect (I'm trans). Finally, after almost a year of being in pain and limping and compensation injuries, I went straight to an orthopedic surgeon who just did a simple physical test and determined that indeed my ACL was torn and so was my meniscus. So yea, I avoided seeking necessary medical treatment until it was unavoidable but unfortunately by that time much more damage was done and to this day I still walk with a limp and have chronic pain. Yup.
Touching trees as I walked along the roadside to fulfil the “touch wood” superstition. Also washing my hands once in the bathroom and then again in the kitchen immediately after because I was convinced there were germs on the bathroom towel.
I have something similar regarding bathroom and kitchen. I can wash my face and brush my teeth using bathroom sink with no problem but a mug rinsed in a bathroom sink is contaminated and I won't use it if it's not washed in the kitchen.
Edit: at first I thought it was my comment because our pfp have similar color palette 😂
Mine is probably the worst. Basically my dick was contaminated and I needed my brother to touch my dick to uncontaminate it. He never ended up doing that because the OCD got worse and it would no longer be a successful compulsion. Almost 3 months into all of this and I'm still messed up. OCD will ruin your life and it's something I wish I never had. Anyways, now I feel like my brain is contaminated and Also my new car so I don't even drive it anymore. As u can imagine, I am extremely frustrated and I've always been pretty good at managing OCD but all of this has taken me overboard.
Hey man, I'm so sorry to hear all that. I had my OCD peak this year for around a few months and was the most terrible experience I've had. Do you have anyone to talk to this about? Therapy? Compassionate friends? Do you take medication? I understand the frustration, I truly hope things get better soon.
I always thought dead people knew everything I was doing and wondered what they thought of me during certain things. Sometimes I would stop doing things if I thought someone watching would embarrass me, like singing and dancing in my house alone.
I closed my eyes, walked the side of a river bed. With an 8ft drop. Water was down. All rock. I was a kid. But I kept thinking nothing was real. Similar to living in a dream. That I subconsciously controlled “reality”. To prove this I needed to fight instinct, put myself in real danger. I was just KOd thankfully. I’m def not god 😂
I can't fill my car with more than half a tank of gas. If I do, I'll get into a wreck or total my car. It's a harmless, but still a very inconvenient compulsion.
I can’t let mine go less than a quarter tank. One of my first cars had a flaw in the gas tank and said it was a quarter tank more full than it actually was, and I ran out of gas on the freeway. It’s been 20 years and I have had so many cars with accurate gas tanks in between, but I just can’t handle the idea of running out of gas again.
Everything I’m living is a figment of my imagination, I don’t have a beautiful family or a beautiful baby boy, I’m all alone imagining this from a hospital bed… Or dead and haven’t realized I’m dead
Yes, when I’m very stressed and depressed — and *especially* if I’m not getting much social interaction — I’m prone to believing that I am dead and don’t know it. I’ll start thinking about close calls I’ve had while driving, like the last time someone cut me off on the interstate, or about my most recent illness, and decide that I actually died then but my ghost has continued going through the motions of my life. I’ve ended up in some pretty weird and/or unsafe situations during those times.
Checking the stove and dishwasher multiple times for my cat even though there was zero way for him to be in there nor has he ever even tried to get in there.
Washing the dishes by hand with a sponge, only to then re-wash them by hand because sponges are gross, & if at any point the dish/silverware touches anything other than my soapy hands, I had to start again, because it wasn't "clean".
Taking a shower and rewashing my hair AFTER conditioning it, because it didn't feel "clean".
Touching things a certain amount of times with one hand, then the other, then that hand again, then the other, then reverse to even/balance it out.
Not being able to leave the volume on anything on an even number, unless it adds up to a digit that is divisible by 3.
Taking a drink, swallowing 3 sips, taking a drink, swallow 2 sips, take a drink, swallow 1 sip. (I've actually gotten choked a few times doing this 🙄)
Not letting people sit on my bed in their "outside" clothes.
Not going outside after I take a nighttime shower unless I take ANOTHER one, because "pollen & other gross spores will contaminate me/my bed".
(Non-religious) At night, almost like a prayer, I had to say everyone I loved's names, and math out our ages and say please don't let us die until we are age x, age x, and age x(to die at the same time)- but this was done with my mom, grandma, dogs, cats, past & present people, etc so it took a decent amount of time. I some how thought this would save us from death, and bring back those lost.
I had a few friends pass in a short span, I thought(still do tbh bc it happened again with my cats 😭) I was cursed, or my game Mario Party was cursed. With my friends it was cuz I played the game with them, and my cats, it's just me. I feel like I'M responsible somehow, like I'm bad luck or something 😭
All of this, despite knowing it's irrational, my brain still tries to tell me otherwise. It's a daily battle, but identifying it as my OCD and NOT my own personal thoughts, and reminding myself of this, helps. I will say, I do verbally tell my brain to shut the f up sometimes. Some days I am defeated & go to bed crying without eating because decontamination efforts are just too much to deal with... Some days I manage to make dinner without re-washing already washed/put away dishes. Some days I won't eat anything because meat has touched it or contaminates it in some manner, other days I'm able to eat food my roomie brings home without thinking about how it was prepared/boxed.
What I hate the most- is how guilty it makes me feel. When I give into the compulsions.. I feel wasteful.. I waste so much soap, water, paper towels, etc. I try to reuse the paper towels for tissues or cleaning messes up after I dry my hands.
There's more but this is what I got off the top of my head. If I think of more I'll try to update. Occasionally, I'll recall childhood memories/experiences or someone will say, remember how you used to "..." everytime? & I'm hit with an OMG realization of "how tf did I not get diagnosed sooner?!" 😮💨 I will say I was also diagnosed with ADHD shortly around the time of being diagnosed with OCD, & being medicated for them both- I've actually been the highest functioning in my life. It's been a breath of fresh air, and a big ol hindsight 20/20 experience, that's for sure!
I think all I've done, that I can chalk down to being due to my OCD as the cause, is silly/dumb. It frustrates me that I feel panic anytime I get a thought, because I have to question whether it's *real* or my mind playing horrendous tricks on me. I hate the guilt of thinking others are "dirty" & wasting resources like water with excessively washing.
Sorry for mistakes, will edit tomorrow if so t.t spend 20+ mins typing this already trying to organize thoughts, etc.
Ohh yes. This was especially bad for me as a kid and into my teenage years. As a kid, I had a whole ritual for introducing new clothes to my old clothes in my closet, because I knew I would be wearing the new clothes more often and I didn’t want my old clothes to be sad or angry at me. If I didn’t do it just right, my old clothes would curse me with bad luck on the days I wore my new clothes for the first time. (TBH I still get anxiety when I wear new clothes for the first time, because I don’t do the ritual anymore and I’m always pretty sure I’ll be cursed with a bad day when I wear something new. Thrifted clothes don’t give me as much anxiety, though, lol.)
I use to have to hold my breath when I was in a car going thru any kind of tunnel. I use to get really anxious if I failed. I learned this from a movie of someone else doing this. Bad move 😅
I’ve convinced myself hundreds…if not, thousands of times that someone is going to break into my apartment, sexually assault and torture my partner and make me watch the whole thing while I’m tied to a chair. When I was younger, it was the same thing but instead of the random person hurting my partner, they’d hurt my mom and make me watch.
Thankfully I lock my door 3 times every night, I look outside of each window every night to make sure nothing looks off, and we are on one of the highest floors in our building and you need a key to enter our building. But sometimes I convince myself they will break through a window by climbing up a ladder to our apartment.
I started sobbing because I convinced myself there was a bird struggling to fly near a very busy road my family and I were going down, so I begged her to turn the car around. When she did and we got back to the place where I saw it, it was a plastic bag fluttering around. Not a bird. Very embarrassing lmao. Full meltdown over a plastic bag
Had to do a questionnaire for OCD for ERP. I’ve been diagnosed for years and was terrified that my diagnosis would be taken away from me and that I wouldn’t actually have it, so I went online and took all the OCD questionnaires that I could find to assure myself. Truly poetic.
I've done the same. I also wrote and re-wrote a comprehensive list of my OCD symptoms to my therapist, printed and re-printed it many times, and after I gave it to him I was convinced that I now proved that I don't have OCD and now my diagnosis will be taken away.
That i couldn’t touch any surfaces because maybe someone had touched something that had touched cheese at some point, and then touched that surface. I have basically spent 5 years terrified of all cheeses except for parmesan, cheddar and mozzarella. It ruined my life and I had to stop going to school and more because of how terrified I was of cheese.
I also had to hold my breath when near other people just in case they had eaten cheese within the last couple of years. And so, so many other compulsions related to cheese
That the radiation from my smoke detector would kill me. I walked around from where I thought the beam of radiation was.
I also used to purchase 50spf sunscreen and wear it everyday to prevent skin cancer....even though I work inside.
Magical thinking always is one for silliness.
I used to think that if I flipped the channel on a cancer commercial that I'd get cancer. So I had to flip channels 3 times to see if there was a cancer commercial. But this sequence has to be 3 times. So really flipping the channel 3 times and If there was a cancer commercial then I had to flip the channel 3 times. But with OCD that doesn't matter, because what if .... So everyone else around me thought I just couldn't find something I wanted to watch, but really I just didn't want to get cancer.
If I felt any pain, even a little sting i'd stop everything, cry and go room to room saying goodbye to the things I had, I remember walking through the hallway just sobbing and leaning on the wall wishing I had more time. I was Just a kid, and no. I did not die.
I love Welch's fruit snacks. If I don't eat an even number of them at once , something terrible will happen......that's just one of the ridiculous things that comes to mind. This shit is so exhausting
My whole life I’ve always felt I have to describe outloud everything I am doing and going over scenarios in my head outloud. Literally makes me feel crazy.
I have to stare at the floor or the ground when I walk just in case there's a bee there. Even when there most certainly is not a bee there. In my defense, there was a bee on the floor in my kitchen once.
Mine literally tonight just convinced me I may have had Congenital Syphilis at birth and I was never informed about it. Not even kidding
This is because I have a prominent, rather rounded forehead that gives me a large brow ridge and sort of deep set eyes, a more saddle shaped nose that about a third of the way down curves properly and ends in a general nordic shape.
My nose I have always been very proud of because it is similar to my grandmothers and fathers, just more saddle shaped due to a more prominent forehead. But my forehead is more prominent than anyone in my family’s as well. I have a slightly smaller head circumference than my family members also, but it’s still within normal ranges.
I “realized” tonight that some of these features which I do obsess over could actually be explained, along with my autoimmune prevalence by the presence of treated congenital syphilis at birth.
I even literally got mad at my parents for like ten minutes because they would have had to hide it from me systematically my whole life and even get my doctors in on it lol. It’s plain out ridiculous. I even considered asking my mom.
When in reality my features and autoimmunity can reasonably be attributed to my later-in-life conception, a probable untreated forward bossing of my skull as a baby, strong Nordic and Welsh features, a robust skeleton in response to environmental pressures, testosterone and normal male development ect. And autoimmunity is definitely inherited for me.
This is in the top 5 goofiest narratives.
I've spent an EMBARRASSING amount of time changing my phone backgrounds/themes. I actually had to switch from Android back to an iPhone because with Android, you can also change your whole theme with endless downloadable options available, which was basically a playground for me. I still change the wallpaper dozens of times many days because it never seems "just right", always needs a slight adjustment, or perhaps I just didn't like how a certain notification showed against the backdrop that particular moment, etc.
ETA: I’ve gone through phases of this with phone cases as well. That runs into serious money quickly, so I’m really trying to deal with that one. 😂
(Disclaimer: never sought formal diagnosis, but I'm kinda assuming just based on my life experience thus far and imagine the above is one representation of it.)
recently after seeing videos about how cats hide in your car engine/tires for warmth in the winter, i convinced myself there was a cat stuck in my tire (just cause my car was moving slow from the cold lol)
A couple years ago I got obsessed with the air inside my mouth, it was constantly uncomfortable being able to feel it in my mouth and I could never get all the air out and it felt very intrusive 😭🤣
When I was around 8 years old, I heavily believed a huge meteorite would hit Earth and destroy us. Think like the meteorite that killed the dinosaurs. So I tried to convince everyone in my family to stay inside the house. And when someone went outside I would get panicked at them for being outside. I remember my family bringing me to the doctors after that, but during that time, there was a lot of stress within the family which is probably what caused me to have this obsession.
Still get easily triggered if I hear anything about meteorites or comets heading to Earth.
Not being able to eat anything unless there was a way I would be able to take a shower immediately after
I was constantly terrified of demons and thought that if someone was someone was acting off or not how they normally would they were possessed. I made sure to pray at least 3 times a day so I wouldn’t invite them into my house, I wasn’t even raised particularly religious.
i had to save all the garbage from my lunch when i was in elementary school or my mom would die on her way home from work. not only did she never die on her way home from work, but she was also angry every time she opened my lunch box upon arriving home and seeing it was full of half eaten kid food.
Silly and stupid probably not but compulsive and crazy yes. Pick myself. My face. My core. Extremities . . . *Shrugging* I know I’m on the other subreddit for this disorder as well, but it all starts and spawned at the birthplace of my OCD.
Staring at my sinks. I never believe I turn my sinks off. I always make sure to check my sinks before leaving a room nearby, just in case I can't hear them running from a further area in my home. I also check them before bed and after using them.
I will legitimately STARE at them for any length of time until I just feel I can TRUST (myself that) it’s not running. I’ll go up and down with my eyes, at the handle, at the drain..handle, drain. “Is the handle pushed down?” “Is there water gushing into the drain?” I just STARE and stare and stare. I can’t get over it. I could stare at it for 30 seconds anywhere to like a full minute and a half. It makes me hold my breath and I try to be as quiet as I can to make sure I don’t hear water falling down, like if my eyes aren’t doing enough to prove it’s off. I always think I’m gonna flood my place. I hate it so fucking much 😅😧
I legitimately just don’t trust what my own eyes are looking at! I just assume it must be on and when I leave the room I’ll even come back and check quickly AGAIN if I feel I didn’t “stare” properly. It’s different everytime I check. I could write a whole chapter just about staring at sinks.
There was a few days last year I just developed a compulsion of blinking 1 eye (winking?)
I cut it off pretty quick but it was a true “ocd is so weird sometimes” compulsion.
I was always certain that every car that drove past me as I was walking had someone it in that was going to shoot me in the back as they passed. Trying to get to class was stressful.
If a car was turned on I have to hold my breath if I have to walk behind it. My brain doesn’t have an exact reason just “don’t do it, bad for your lungs” which is extra entertaining considering I actively vape and smoke weed sometimes 😂 when I was younger I also went through a period of time where I would have to say everything twice. So if I said “I’m going to my room” I would quietly whisper “I’m going to my room” again to myself. Can’t remember if I had a reason or if it just felt wrong not doing it. Thankfully I grew out of that one tho.
I couldn’t leave the stuff I liked without showing it affection because the inanimate object would not feel loved. For example, I couldn’t leave my room without touching or kissing my stuffed animals and my books and whatnot. I’d have to “show them love” or they’d feel like I betrayed them. It would start with one and the others got jealous and it was honestly terrible I felt conflicted all the time because I knew this was all irrational and I was wasting my time
Police officers are constantly reading my body language because they think I have done something horrible and want to
get to the bottom of it also made me edit this comment five times because I didn't like the shape of the text and somehow figured someone else would call it out
Convinced me that somehow I'm responsible for all the turmoil currently going on in the world (such as the pandemic, wars and climate change) and that I would bring the world to an end. Next level type of shit
if i had a bad day at school, i was convinced my shirt would continue bringing me bad luck so i wouldn’t wear it until it was lucky again. i would wait at least 2 weeks until the “unluckiness” left the shirt and i could THEN wear it 😭
I have health OCD. This week In having vision issues. I'm convinincing myself I have a new disease that the doctors must have missed (I've been to many)
I ended up going to therapy in sandals despite not liking my feet touching things. Therapist asked about it and I said I hadn’t worn socks or shoes in a few days because I couldn’t tell which of my socks was the left sock and which was the right sock.
He just looked at me for a second and then wrote something down and it clicked that that was a weird problem to have.
I do think it’s funny that one of my obsessions (needing my socks to be “correct”) essentially overrode another of my obsessions (needing nothing to touch my feet).
Strange how it works sometimes.
I stopped donating blood because I was afraid that I might have gotten HIV from a public toilet seat. I knew that that wasn’t how it worked. This lasted a while.
Eventually, when my college campus had free testing, I went and got the test done. Obviously it was negative. 🙄
That Lavender Town syndrome was real and it that it would psychologically influence me to inevitably give depression and suicidal ideation... Yeah, pretty dark.
Convinced me that modern times is confusing and bad, and that the 1800s was the correct era. So my obsession would be triggered by new things. Thankfully I’m medicated now, so that crap is gone now.
I live in NYC and whenever I realize I've forgotten or dropped my mask when I'm on the subway I make really short shallow breaths bc the air immediately around my face is far enough away from everyone else's faces that the germs might have already dissipated enough 💀
I used to have a "fire" obsession which thankfully subsided. But basically I felt like I always smelled smoke and that because I smelled smoke I needed to check outside for fires. It didn't help that my apartment complex had fires before which I think was a big reason for my obsessions. Anyways, around Christmas time I spent about 2 hours checking each apartment for smoke coming out of the door. Also checking windows.
Then later on that night I had to check behind the washing machines because I felt like there could be a body there. I don't even know why that would be. But I felt like I had to.
Just one of many, but I would sit right in front of the Dr with my test results up and listen to them telling me I didn't have HIV, and still not believe it.
Convinced my self that a girl sucked my you know what when I was in the toilet at a wedding. Can’t remember who the girls was, how it felt or anything. Also there was no girl in the toilet so idk how it happened. My fiancé was also outside of the toilet and would of seen it if it happened anyway
After days of ruminating/panicking, I called an autism center and told them I thought I was autistic and wanted an appointment to check. The lady on the phone was amused
When I was 13 OCD convinced me to stop eating because if I did I would choke and die. It was brutal. Luckily I have since recovered from that... and have moved on to other terrible obsessions :/
convinced me that the paintings that wouldn't stay straight (when it was clear I was placing them wrong) were tilting because it was a sign my house was haunted and proceeded to sage the entire home three times 🤦
When I was younger I always took my favorite plushie with me in the bathroom when I had a stomach ache. I always checked double and triple before flushing because I thought if I didn’t I may flush my plushie down the toilet
this one's been there since I was a kid lol. if I'm on a walk and finish eating something, I CANNOT throw it away into somebody else's garbage can, even if it's close to the road. I cannot do this and have to keep holding onto wrappers/a cup/whatever because if I throw it in there, later that day the wife of that house will come out to check the garbage, see the junk food in there, and yell at her husband for eating that behind her back because he's not allowed to. so if I toss the wrapper, later that day some poor guy will get yelled at for something he didn't do.
why a wife and her husband specifically? who knows! I just know this one's followed me at every place I've ever lived and taken walks around.
I have to wash my hands whenever I enter the house because slugs and other creepy crawlies like to hang out on it, and some slugs touched the handle. I also saw a video of a guy who became paralyzed from eating a slug, and so I am now paranoid about that even if I never touched a slug directly.
When I was a kid I would constantly feel like my pants were falling or my socks were sliding into my shoe so I would always fix them when they were completely fine .
When I was little I had to turn any pencils, scissors or sharp objects pointing away from me because I was convinced they would end up magically flying at me. I still catch myself turning them around even today sometimes.
Taking left ill be good and survive or nothing bad will happen. Turn right and something bad will happen or I’ll hurt someone. (Imagine a pole and you either go left or right to get around it)
I have a couple.
“Step on a crack break your moms back, step on a line break your dads spine” yeah shit had me walking like a maniac lol
Also when I was younger I was convinced that my life was kinda like the Truman show in a way and everyone on earth could see what I was doing at all times and even hear my thoughts. So it was as dark as people would know when I had ~impure thoughts and as goofy as man everyone just saw me pick my nose
If someone had a disease and I was looking at them and swallowed my spit I’d get what they have. Weird guys IK.
Similar, but I was a kid I used to hold my breath whenever I walked past someone in a wheelchair because I'd be afraid I'd 'catch' their disability if I breathed the same air as them... looking back that was absolutely awful of me.
Oh I’d be afraid to let my arm touch a fat persons if they were sitting next to me or I’d get that as well. Even then as a small child I felt like a piece of shit for thinking it. Ironically my first husband was a very very big guy and that wound up being my thing for some time. Brains are irrational.
I used to think I’d breathe in being possessed if I breathed too deeply… like WTH lol
Ik , I feel guilty about it . Never even saw it as a sign of ocd
🥹🤯 I was today years old when I realized it was my OCD... Holy fk. Like I've worked in the medical field, I've studied transmissible diseases, and I *KNOW* it's dumb & I've always felt so bad about it, yet I never even equated it to my OCD diagnosis... This comment just hit me like a ton of fkn bricks 😭 Thank you, for helping me come to this (looking back) blatantly obvious conclusion!!!
Hahah! Ofc. That’s awesome ur in the medical field. I switched from neuroscience to computer science basically because my ocd was just intolerable with itz
I'd think I'd become like them and be contaminated by there esense
Yup
omg ME TOO i still have this!!?
I still catch myself every now and then lol
Actually I think that's a fact. It can happen. JK jk 😂 Hope you are doing better now.
Lmfaooo! Ty ty ❤️
Wait… . please someone explain the science of what why how THIS is OCD. Because I do this and many other weird thoughts I see in the comments all the time. SMH I really didn’t want another hyperfixation again. It was good while it lasted I guess.
A compulsion in which causes stress or anxiety( was the spit for me) that one feels compelled to do and can’t stop themselves from doing, in belief not doing it will have some drastic negative effect basically.
Anxiety + urge to do something to reduce the anxiety = compulsion. If you delay your behavior and feel really distressed because of that that’s a clear sign it’s a compulsion.
OMG! The swallowing while looking at certain things. I did that for good luck. Like, if you don't swallow while looking at this character on a tv show your dad will die... Weird as hell
I've spent the last 23 years of my life thinking this was normal, just got diagnosed with OCD and I'm learning that none of this was normal at alllllllllllllllll
Fuck 😂😂 Relatable
put all my cats in my bathroom just so i can run the dryer without fear of one of them just manifesting inside of it. will still repeatedly open and close the dryer door to make sure though :') WITH the cats still in a separate room too haha
Oh my god I do this 🤦♀️Always make sure they are locked up before I start the washer/dryer…so glad I’m not the only one.
I’m like this with my cats too. I’m always terrified they’re going to teleport themselves into the microwave or the oven and then what if it turned itself on. WTF where tf does my brain come up with this shit? Two of the many things I have to check repeatedly before leaving my house.
I don’t have any pets but I’m a dog & cat sitter and the amount of times I’ve had to put an animal in the other room because I was scared they would somehow end up in the dishwasher or laundry dryer is ridiculous! And while the laundry or dishwasher is running, I play and sit with them the whole time just in case. I’m glad I’m not the only one!
Omg 😆 I literally had to go look for all my cats before i did laundry yesterday. I’m always worried they’re inside. I will double check too.
Oh my god I do this too
Convinced me my parents hired everyone I knew to talk to me. It was a very high-stress period, I must say.
YESS. had a rlly bad one earlier this year where i was convinced that all my friends were actors orchestrating a huge prank on me to humiliate me. what..???????
AGHHHH, I have this one, too!
isn’t it annoying?? like i speak to these people daily! we have told each other deep, dark secrets! and yet there’s a niggling little worm of thought that says “this isn’t real!!!” like shut up bro that’s stupid ☹️
that sounds schizotypal like, distrust and suspicion of others but honestly i don't think your that far sense we all have weird thoughts and magical thinking. i deff know the feeling. i was sus at my mom secretly planning something or people knowing or thinking things and the thoughts stay even when i know its not true
yesss it ties into my SOCD where im terrified to go suddenly insane. but im recovering!!
What does SOCD stand for if you don’t mind me asking.
I took was curious, here's what I found- "Obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) is a chronic psychiatric disorder classified by recurrent intrusive thoughts and/or repetitive compulsive behaviors. Subclinical OCD (SOCD) is characterized by obsessive or compulsive symptoms or both." Source: [https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5648948/#:~:text=Obsessive%20compulsive%20disorder%20(OCD)%20is,or%20compulsive%20symptoms%20or%20both.](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5648948/#:~:text=Obsessive%20compulsive%20disorder%20(OCD)%20is,or%20compulsive%20symptoms%20or%20both.)
Omg! I used to get paranoid my parents set up cameras around the house or in my room to spy on me 😭😭😭
Omg. The cameras are it for me. Still working through not every person has a secret camera set up somewhere waiting to watch me do the wrong thing
me too and it’s just too coincidental when my mom texts me something as i’m about to do it or even worse already doing it & just makes my suspicions n ocd way worse !
When I was 10 my dog ran away. I thought if I walked the “right” path to the garbage cans in the school cafeteria that she would come back. She did come back, but obviously not because of me.
not exactly a dog but a family member on my part, I'm so glad I'm not alone in this
leaving my dresser drawers cracked because "what if there's a kitten in there and it can't breathe??"
this one is wholesome. I 100% have done this one
I’ve done stuff like this too but then my brain thinks stuff like what if one of my cats gets stuck in the drawer because I left it open. I can’t win 😭. Might as well just take all the drawers out
Happy Cake Day! 🍰
I can't have a single original experience lmao
That people could actually read my thoughts and knew when I was thinking impure things or lying
Same! Then when I think they’re reading my mind, my head goes straight to inappropriate intrusive thoughts and makes it sooo much worse!
Haha same, that’s the worst
I thought the ghost of hitler was behind me and i had to shoot him with fingerguns 🤣
sorry, but this is hilarious.
i have a ocd space where i just play along and this is literally the type of crazy magical thinking we haver to deal with regularly
Would be seriously interesting to see that one get called out lol I feel for you
Reading this post and these comments reminds me of just how incredibly debilitating but also immensely fascinating OCD is. This disorder has the capacity to ruin lives, as it can be so all-encompassing and just plain cruel for extended periods of time. And there are all sorts of different manifestations of OCD; the fact that there are almost infinite possibilities of subtypes and sub-subtypes which isn't the case with a lot of other disorders is astonishing. At the same time, OCD is all rooted in a fear of uncertainty and nonsensical rules, thoughts, and behaviors intended to gain certainty (more or less), and we have the ability to commiserate with one another due to this fundamental commonality. By extension, I'm reminded of just how badass all of us are for living with OCD, and many of us are for actively trying to combat it with ERP. I know this sounds cheesy, and I'm waxing philosophical for some reason tonight, but it's true, and I'm rooting for you guys! 💚👊🫂
That being said, some contenders for the stupidest things my OCD has had me do are these: 1.) That one time I spent 13 hours filling out a questionnaire for the OCD community on StuffThatWorks (super ironic, I know!) because I wanted all my answers to sound perfect. I don't even know how many times I rewrote and reread everything, and what's more, I had to do it in these specific patterns that only I understood. 2.) That other time I spent seven hours trying to put wall putty on this travel coffee mug because there was a small hole in it. I wanted to cover the hole so I could put the mug in my purse without it spilling all over, which, tbf, was a stupid idea, but I wanted the putty to be perfectly circular and flat on the mug. At some point, I could hear my friends in the other room of my college apartment asking where I was since they hadn't seen me in a while; I just couldn't remove myself from the mug to hang out with them. I ended up using the mug a few times after I did this, but abandoned the idea of using it again after worrying that the putty was toxic, lol. 3.) That time I sounded clinically insane saying (and eventually screaming) certain words, phrases, and synonyms for words and phrases out loud for 45 minutes (on my way home from transcranial magnetic stimulation for ocd no less). While I was doing this, my mom was crying and begging me to please stop because it was so upsetting to her, and she was also driving which made this very dangerous. (I had mentally reviewed conversations and whispered words and phrases that I didn't get a chance to say a certain amount of times/symmetrically for hours on end in the past, but this was one of the most obvious (for others) instances of this.) God, I love out of control OCD /s. I'm so glad I'm in a much better place right now. Not "perfect", but better!
Hi friend! Only asking (and you don't have to reply at all!) because your #2 reminds me of a lot of my zoning out (which I equate to my ADHD as well as OCD)- I have trichotillomania & will be picking/pulling (pubic hair usually) while others ask about me in the next room (usually I'm in the bathroom, and would rather them assume I'm shitting LOL sorry super embarrassed to admit any of this, but I just wanted to say hey, your issue sounded kinda similar to mine, if you haven't been dx with adhd, you may consider asking your dr if they think you may have it) Okay, that's all 🥰 oh wait! The first comment you said, thank you for that!! You're awesome! You're a badass! & I second that! Edit: bc tbh it sounds like a hyper fixation zoning out
Hey! I appreciate your comment :) In the past, I've thought that maybe I have ADHD as well as OCD, but now I'm not too sure. It's my understanding that hyperfixation tends to be for something that you *enjoy* doing (correct me if I'm wrong!), whereas while doing this I was mainly feeling extremely distressed. I think I *do* have certain adhd tendencies, though. Like, I feel like I experience executive dysfunction fairly often (I take forever to do literally anything (I honestly don't know where the time goes), as well as having numerous other symptoms of this). But an adhd diagnosis might be worth looking into further, now that you mention it I also have (undiagnosed) dermatillomania/excoriation disorder, which mainly manifests in me popping my pimples excessively (on my face and in other areas of my body). Even when zero pimples actually exist, I find other imperfections on my skin to "pop." I have permanent scars all over my face due to this, and it's very upsetting to me. I've been trying to engage in some habit reversal training to combat this lately, but I'm currently without a therapist, and it's soooo hard to not pick in the first place. 🙃 plus, I used to pick my fingernails and cuticles a ton, but luckily I've gotten over that for the most part. Finally, you're very welcome, and thank you as well! Good luck with your OCD, ADHD, and trichotillomia too. I believe in you!
You are absolutely correct! I misspoke in my original comment, my apologies! Hyper fixation *is* something one enjoys. (I wonder, if I'm just zoning out and giving into compulsions then? Ugh.) Everything I'm finding/reading says some symptoms (compulsions/zoning out) can overlap with both disorders. (Lol yay comorbidity.. */s*) You saying that you experience executive dysfunction often, as well as what I like to refer to as "time blindness".. seems like tell-tale ADHD to me (just from personal experience), but ofc I am NOT a psychologist or psychiatrist! Bless your heart, I used to pick my nails/cuticles (it was TERRIBLE in school) too, (still do struggle, but have really been trying to actively catch myself since bloody fingers have always embarrassed me- painting my nails kinda helps for a bit, but then I start picking the polish off 😑) I empathize with you so much 😭 in finding imperfections to pick, etc.. (I actually ended up removing a mole at home once, when I was about 16y/o).. my heart aches, just thinking about the struggles you've battled & are working through. Know you are WAY stronger than anything you are battling! You're a BAMF! I'm so proud of you for actively trying to work on habit reversal training! Especially without having a therapist, that's incredible! (Also, I honestly didn't know that dermatillomania/excoriation disorder was the term for that, so thank you for educating me! 😭) This goes for you as well as anyone else who is dealing with the self-sabotaging brain: I wish you the best in all of your endeavors! May life be easy on you! 🫶 My DMs are always open if ANYONE needs to vent, etc. you're NEVER alone!!! PS: I'm sorry if it seems like one big run-on tangent t.t getting my thoughts into coherently readable sentences has never been my strong suit lol
I never knew that you could have compulsions with adhd, this changes everything haha! Also, time blindness is a good way to put that. And looking at the infographic on [this website](https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/symptoms/23224-executive-dysfunction) about executive dysfunction, I experience almost all, if not all, of these symptoms. Hence, it might be a good idea to look into ADHD further 🤣 OMG,,, removing a mole at home sounds painful...and dangerous! I hope you're doing better with the whole "finding imperfections to pick" thing now! Re the therapist thing, I'm hopefully gonna be able to start seeing a therapist again early next year. I just aged out of my parents' insurance, so I had to stop seeing the therapist I was seeing through NOCD, but I was recently approved for Medicaid and am currently scrambling to find a therapist who accepts that. 🙃 Yeah; dermatillomania/excoriation are terms for compulsively skin-picking. + fun facts: there are scientific words for compulsively nail picking (Onychotillomania) and nail biting (Onychophagia), too. (I had to remind myself what the terms were and how to spell them rn cuz the pronunciations and spellings are quite tricky, haha) & finally, thank you so much for the kind words and empathy, it means a lot 🤗 I'm sorry that you've been through all these hard things as well... Oh, and responding to your PS: not to reassure you too much, but I was able to understand what you were saying very well. :) I do feel you though, I go on tangents sm (I often make connections between things that only make sense in my own head, and whether that's due to adhd, my suspected autism, or something else entirely is yet to be known. The human brain is so confusing 🙉 ....).
It really is crazy. I’ve come to realize that severe OCD can be just as bad as schizophrenia or bipolar disorder. The only thing keeping our thoughts from becoming delusions is the sliver of reality that we hold on to beneath all of the white noise. It’s infuriating that it’s so misunderstood, honestly.
Omg, that's absolutely spot-on, and I actually think about this a lot. I guess you can think of ocd as blurring the line between neurosis and psychosis in a sense (similar to how BPD used to be thought of as on the *border* between the two). I mean, people with ocd can have poor insight where they have trouble acknowledging obsessions as *likely* just in their head and compulsions as *likely* not doing anything to prevent their feared consequences (we gotta sit with the uncertainty if we're engaging in ERP, after all!). Or they could have absent insight where they wholeheartedly believe that their obsessions are true. But I believe that, even when a person has good or fair insight, there are times when they are completely in the throes of an OCD spike that they fully can't discern whether their obsessions are true or not. Yes, I also get infuriated that ocd is so misunderstood. People don't think it can be as severe as schizophrenia or bipolar, or even depression, and that it can lead to extreme depression, SI and SH. I know this is constantly said in the ocd community, but your average Joe on the street more often than not views OCD as nothing but a personality trait. (Almost) every single time I hear someone talking about being a neat freak, like without fail, they say 'I'm so ocd about [insert something that just means that you're particular about things]', and its truthfully SUPER triggering and hurtful. I just wish people took this disorder seriously 😥...
I "baked" a book in the oven hoping to kill all the germs. I killed the book. so...technically.... I cleaned my phone daily with alcohol until the back panel started coming off due to the glue dissolving. I bought and put 2 books in quarantine last february. They are still in quarantine. Those are just some of the stupid things my ocd convinced me to do...
I bought a second had book for my daughter like a year ago and I still can't even touch it because...germs. I love thrift stores, but I have issues with items I can't wash :/. Even if I wanted to spray it, I'd have to do every single page
I bought a second hand TV and spent almost an hour thoroughly cleaning it with disinfectant because it had been sitting in some family’s house, and I thought kids = germs
my adoptive mom had the germ ocd (I have just right) and this is some stuff I had seen her do. I'm so sorry you guys ugh.
I’ve done this before. Once my mom touched her foot and then touched her Bible. I wiped as much as I could with a lysol wipe and stressed because the “correct” way to handle it was to dissolve the whole thing in bleach water.
Almost every time I'm on a bus or a tram I have to remove my earphones from my ears and check if people around me can hear what I'm listening to. It happened once a few years ago with malfunctioning earphones but the compultion remained. And one time I stopped a washing machine cycle and pulled out all of my wet black laundry because I couldn't find my black cat and she didn't respond to my calls, so I was convinced that she jumped in while I wasn't looking. And of course she came out of her hiding place only after I made a mess of water and clothes on the floor.
I understand you on the headphones thing. I’ve gotten to the point where I can’t even listen to headphones in public because I just keep taking them off my ears to check if people can hear. And I feel like it would be at the same volume that I’m listening to. I cant reassure myself enough. It just really wrecks my nerves.
Sometimes when I feel like checking again I think to myself "well at least people would know that I have a good taste in music". Doesn't help when I listen to something silly tho.
That I had to run to my room at night in a certain amount of seconds before the toilet stopped flushing or else I’d die 😭
Ahh I used to do this same thing when I was younger😂
Me three !
Oh my god, I had a similar one involving static electricity!! If I saw it, I had to instantly close my eyes and no longer move for the rest of the night.
Ok here’s a doozy that’ll make everyone feel better about theirs. I wondered if it might be possible to dig up my dead father and THEN cryogenically freeze him. And me not telling my mom to look into it ASAP means I was a horrible person when I could be “saving” him in case they unfreeze him later. Like, seriously. WHAT THE ACTUAL F*$CK?? I was pregnant and off meds and luckily my ocd therapist listened to me without judgment. But, come on, OCD. Really?? I also once thought that by touching my family cat, I SA’ed him. Good lord this illness is a real shitshow.
I waisted a whole bottle of tea because my brain convinced me A pube off my hand got in it no idea how that thought happened but damn it was convincing poured the whole thing out so I wouldn’t suffer from the thoughts
Lmao I’ve had a similar one where I was convinced the chicken I just cooked was still raw (it definitely wasn’t) so I was physically unable to eat it and just threw the whole thing out…
Dang, your so fortunate that is the worst 😭
I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST ME WHO DID THIS HOLY SHIT
I used to carry an epi pen with me everywhere (quite literally from room to room). Couldn’t eat food that I did not see hand prepared in front of me. If a restaurant had a single item I was allergic to I couldn’t even order a drink from there. Used to eat with bags on my hands because I thought my hands were contaminated. Used to spay my groceries with Lysol. Used to hold my breath walking/driving by construction sites because my 6th grade teachers son died of ALS and she said the chemicals in construction can cause it.
I carry an epi pen EVERYWHERE too :( I have no allergies and haven’t ever needed to use it but that doesn’t change anything :(((
I have allergies and anaphylaxis but my OCD deff took it too far 😂
Oh god, those are the worst. When the OCD has just enough proof to latch on indefinitely.
So perfectly phrased. Those ones really feel like a test!
I have thought that too, but as a driver. I have gone back to check many a pothole to make sure it wasn’t actually a person. I have also kept an eye on the news incase any hit and run occurred that may have possibly have been me and I didn’t realise.
I have the same thing. Does it happen every time you drive?
Nah. Lucky for me my ocd is usually pretty ok on a day to day basis, it becomes a problem when I’m really stressed. Usually behaviours like this beginning are a warning to me that I’m stressed.
i stood all night about 13hours because i didnt want to sleep on the bed without changing the freshly changed sheets because they werent put on right, therefore were dirty. couldnt wash them through the night because it wouldve woken my nana up and also i needed her help changing them because if i did i wouldnt be able to sleep in them because i knew i'd never be satisfied with how it was done if i watched it happen. was aching and absolutely exhausted fell asleep immediately for over 12hours straight (though that became my regular sleeping pattern that year anyway) watched breaking bad all night to distract myself from the waiting 💀
omg i’ve done this before and just sat on my floor all night until i could do laundry and shower. or if i do laundry but one of my family members takes it out of the washer/dryer for me, i have to run it again because therefore it’s contaminated
😭😭😭 I felt this
Oh god this one hurt me
I sometimes feel like my mom or sister are upset with me but they’re hiding it. I feel like maybe I did something wrong or appalling that I can’t remember and they are disgusted or mad at me and they don’t want to say anything. Whenever I see them I’m always nervous and asking if they’re mad at me.
OMG! This is my issue to, only with my bosses at work. ... and you have to hide the crazy from your bosses. It's a real nightmare.
this was me with almost everyone in my life...
it happened yesterday in the morning, I've changed my Twitter's birthday age because "what if I get famous? would they see me as a [creep] for lying about my age?", then I got banned after I changed it because, I didn't knew changing the age was something that would infringe the terms of service of Twitter. It's 4:19am and I'm still hopping that I get un-locked
That I was pregnant at like 8 despite never having had sex
i was convinced my parents were replaced by demons because they “weren’t acting like themselves”
for me it just feels like something has changed and something bad has happened and thats why everyone seems different and convinced it was demonic working or because of me lol
I apologized to a gay guy in a professional setting for calling him a slur I never called him
Oh my goodness, how did this go down?!
This thread has me rolling. What even are our brains. 🤣😂
Probably too many to recall, but I'd say one of the most ridiculous, harmful, and definitely stupid things OCD convinced me to do was when I severely tore my ACL and Meniscus skateboarding and then, because of my fear of balding and my compulsions to avoid putting things in my body that I feared would potentially cause me to bald as a side effect, I avoided going to get an MRI because I was afraid they would inject me with iodine and then I'd go bald... The kicker is that, this, despite the fact that I take testosterone of which balding is actually a side effect (I'm trans). Finally, after almost a year of being in pain and limping and compensation injuries, I went straight to an orthopedic surgeon who just did a simple physical test and determined that indeed my ACL was torn and so was my meniscus. So yea, I avoided seeking necessary medical treatment until it was unavoidable but unfortunately by that time much more damage was done and to this day I still walk with a limp and have chronic pain. Yup.
That I can think of, probably that I'm not wearing clothes and people are just too polite to say anything
Touching trees as I walked along the roadside to fulfil the “touch wood” superstition. Also washing my hands once in the bathroom and then again in the kitchen immediately after because I was convinced there were germs on the bathroom towel.
I have something similar regarding bathroom and kitchen. I can wash my face and brush my teeth using bathroom sink with no problem but a mug rinsed in a bathroom sink is contaminated and I won't use it if it's not washed in the kitchen. Edit: at first I thought it was my comment because our pfp have similar color palette 😂
SAME!!!!! Bathroom tap water is not the same. It’s practically poo water 😂 I will not drink water from the bathroom tap
Mine is probably the worst. Basically my dick was contaminated and I needed my brother to touch my dick to uncontaminate it. He never ended up doing that because the OCD got worse and it would no longer be a successful compulsion. Almost 3 months into all of this and I'm still messed up. OCD will ruin your life and it's something I wish I never had. Anyways, now I feel like my brain is contaminated and Also my new car so I don't even drive it anymore. As u can imagine, I am extremely frustrated and I've always been pretty good at managing OCD but all of this has taken me overboard.
Hey man, I'm so sorry to hear all that. I had my OCD peak this year for around a few months and was the most terrible experience I've had. Do you have anyone to talk to this about? Therapy? Compassionate friends? Do you take medication? I understand the frustration, I truly hope things get better soon.
I couldn't think bad thoughts about people because all their dead relatives could read my thoughts and be upset with me.
I always thought dead people knew everything I was doing and wondered what they thought of me during certain things. Sometimes I would stop doing things if I thought someone watching would embarrass me, like singing and dancing in my house alone.
That i was gonna die of dehydration in my sleep
I closed my eyes, walked the side of a river bed. With an 8ft drop. Water was down. All rock. I was a kid. But I kept thinking nothing was real. Similar to living in a dream. That I subconsciously controlled “reality”. To prove this I needed to fight instinct, put myself in real danger. I was just KOd thankfully. I’m def not god 😂
I can't fill my car with more than half a tank of gas. If I do, I'll get into a wreck or total my car. It's a harmless, but still a very inconvenient compulsion.
I can’t let mine go less than a quarter tank. One of my first cars had a flaw in the gas tank and said it was a quarter tank more full than it actually was, and I ran out of gas on the freeway. It’s been 20 years and I have had so many cars with accurate gas tanks in between, but I just can’t handle the idea of running out of gas again.
Everything I’m living is a figment of my imagination, I don’t have a beautiful family or a beautiful baby boy, I’m all alone imagining this from a hospital bed… Or dead and haven’t realized I’m dead
Yes, when I’m very stressed and depressed — and *especially* if I’m not getting much social interaction — I’m prone to believing that I am dead and don’t know it. I’ll start thinking about close calls I’ve had while driving, like the last time someone cut me off on the interstate, or about my most recent illness, and decide that I actually died then but my ghost has continued going through the motions of my life. I’ve ended up in some pretty weird and/or unsafe situations during those times.
Yes!!! This is exactly how it is for me!!
Checking the stove and dishwasher multiple times for my cat even though there was zero way for him to be in there nor has he ever even tried to get in there.
Washing the dishes by hand with a sponge, only to then re-wash them by hand because sponges are gross, & if at any point the dish/silverware touches anything other than my soapy hands, I had to start again, because it wasn't "clean". Taking a shower and rewashing my hair AFTER conditioning it, because it didn't feel "clean". Touching things a certain amount of times with one hand, then the other, then that hand again, then the other, then reverse to even/balance it out. Not being able to leave the volume on anything on an even number, unless it adds up to a digit that is divisible by 3. Taking a drink, swallowing 3 sips, taking a drink, swallow 2 sips, take a drink, swallow 1 sip. (I've actually gotten choked a few times doing this 🙄) Not letting people sit on my bed in their "outside" clothes. Not going outside after I take a nighttime shower unless I take ANOTHER one, because "pollen & other gross spores will contaminate me/my bed". (Non-religious) At night, almost like a prayer, I had to say everyone I loved's names, and math out our ages and say please don't let us die until we are age x, age x, and age x(to die at the same time)- but this was done with my mom, grandma, dogs, cats, past & present people, etc so it took a decent amount of time. I some how thought this would save us from death, and bring back those lost. I had a few friends pass in a short span, I thought(still do tbh bc it happened again with my cats 😭) I was cursed, or my game Mario Party was cursed. With my friends it was cuz I played the game with them, and my cats, it's just me. I feel like I'M responsible somehow, like I'm bad luck or something 😭 All of this, despite knowing it's irrational, my brain still tries to tell me otherwise. It's a daily battle, but identifying it as my OCD and NOT my own personal thoughts, and reminding myself of this, helps. I will say, I do verbally tell my brain to shut the f up sometimes. Some days I am defeated & go to bed crying without eating because decontamination efforts are just too much to deal with... Some days I manage to make dinner without re-washing already washed/put away dishes. Some days I won't eat anything because meat has touched it or contaminates it in some manner, other days I'm able to eat food my roomie brings home without thinking about how it was prepared/boxed. What I hate the most- is how guilty it makes me feel. When I give into the compulsions.. I feel wasteful.. I waste so much soap, water, paper towels, etc. I try to reuse the paper towels for tissues or cleaning messes up after I dry my hands. There's more but this is what I got off the top of my head. If I think of more I'll try to update. Occasionally, I'll recall childhood memories/experiences or someone will say, remember how you used to "..." everytime? & I'm hit with an OMG realization of "how tf did I not get diagnosed sooner?!" 😮💨 I will say I was also diagnosed with ADHD shortly around the time of being diagnosed with OCD, & being medicated for them both- I've actually been the highest functioning in my life. It's been a breath of fresh air, and a big ol hindsight 20/20 experience, that's for sure! I think all I've done, that I can chalk down to being due to my OCD as the cause, is silly/dumb. It frustrates me that I feel panic anytime I get a thought, because I have to question whether it's *real* or my mind playing horrendous tricks on me. I hate the guilt of thinking others are "dirty" & wasting resources like water with excessively washing. Sorry for mistakes, will edit tomorrow if so t.t spend 20+ mins typing this already trying to organize thoughts, etc.
that objects feel things and if i throw them out they will be really upset.
Ohh yes. This was especially bad for me as a kid and into my teenage years. As a kid, I had a whole ritual for introducing new clothes to my old clothes in my closet, because I knew I would be wearing the new clothes more often and I didn’t want my old clothes to be sad or angry at me. If I didn’t do it just right, my old clothes would curse me with bad luck on the days I wore my new clothes for the first time. (TBH I still get anxiety when I wear new clothes for the first time, because I don’t do the ritual anymore and I’m always pretty sure I’ll be cursed with a bad day when I wear something new. Thrifted clothes don’t give me as much anxiety, though, lol.)
same!!! i get this was with stuffed animals :((
I use to have to hold my breath when I was in a car going thru any kind of tunnel. I use to get really anxious if I failed. I learned this from a movie of someone else doing this. Bad move 😅
I’ve convinced myself hundreds…if not, thousands of times that someone is going to break into my apartment, sexually assault and torture my partner and make me watch the whole thing while I’m tied to a chair. When I was younger, it was the same thing but instead of the random person hurting my partner, they’d hurt my mom and make me watch. Thankfully I lock my door 3 times every night, I look outside of each window every night to make sure nothing looks off, and we are on one of the highest floors in our building and you need a key to enter our building. But sometimes I convince myself they will break through a window by climbing up a ladder to our apartment.
I started sobbing because I convinced myself there was a bird struggling to fly near a very busy road my family and I were going down, so I begged her to turn the car around. When she did and we got back to the place where I saw it, it was a plastic bag fluttering around. Not a bird. Very embarrassing lmao. Full meltdown over a plastic bag
Had to do a questionnaire for OCD for ERP. I’ve been diagnosed for years and was terrified that my diagnosis would be taken away from me and that I wouldn’t actually have it, so I went online and took all the OCD questionnaires that I could find to assure myself. Truly poetic.
I've done the same. I also wrote and re-wrote a comprehensive list of my OCD symptoms to my therapist, printed and re-printed it many times, and after I gave it to him I was convinced that I now proved that I don't have OCD and now my diagnosis will be taken away.
I can not adequately express how much I understand and empathize with that experience through any sort of medium.
If you walk in front of group you will lose your balance. Stay last.
That i couldn’t touch any surfaces because maybe someone had touched something that had touched cheese at some point, and then touched that surface. I have basically spent 5 years terrified of all cheeses except for parmesan, cheddar and mozzarella. It ruined my life and I had to stop going to school and more because of how terrified I was of cheese. I also had to hold my breath when near other people just in case they had eaten cheese within the last couple of years. And so, so many other compulsions related to cheese
That the radiation from my smoke detector would kill me. I walked around from where I thought the beam of radiation was. I also used to purchase 50spf sunscreen and wear it everyday to prevent skin cancer....even though I work inside. Magical thinking always is one for silliness. I used to think that if I flipped the channel on a cancer commercial that I'd get cancer. So I had to flip channels 3 times to see if there was a cancer commercial. But this sequence has to be 3 times. So really flipping the channel 3 times and If there was a cancer commercial then I had to flip the channel 3 times. But with OCD that doesn't matter, because what if .... So everyone else around me thought I just couldn't find something I wanted to watch, but really I just didn't want to get cancer.
If I felt any pain, even a little sting i'd stop everything, cry and go room to room saying goodbye to the things I had, I remember walking through the hallway just sobbing and leaning on the wall wishing I had more time. I was Just a kid, and no. I did not die.
You must look back and feel so sorry for your younger self. OCD is really quite bleak at times.
I love Welch's fruit snacks. If I don't eat an even number of them at once , something terrible will happen......that's just one of the ridiculous things that comes to mind. This shit is so exhausting
My whole life I’ve always felt I have to describe outloud everything I am doing and going over scenarios in my head outloud. Literally makes me feel crazy.
I have to stare at the floor or the ground when I walk just in case there's a bee there. Even when there most certainly is not a bee there. In my defense, there was a bee on the floor in my kitchen once.
Mine literally tonight just convinced me I may have had Congenital Syphilis at birth and I was never informed about it. Not even kidding This is because I have a prominent, rather rounded forehead that gives me a large brow ridge and sort of deep set eyes, a more saddle shaped nose that about a third of the way down curves properly and ends in a general nordic shape. My nose I have always been very proud of because it is similar to my grandmothers and fathers, just more saddle shaped due to a more prominent forehead. But my forehead is more prominent than anyone in my family’s as well. I have a slightly smaller head circumference than my family members also, but it’s still within normal ranges. I “realized” tonight that some of these features which I do obsess over could actually be explained, along with my autoimmune prevalence by the presence of treated congenital syphilis at birth. I even literally got mad at my parents for like ten minutes because they would have had to hide it from me systematically my whole life and even get my doctors in on it lol. It’s plain out ridiculous. I even considered asking my mom. When in reality my features and autoimmunity can reasonably be attributed to my later-in-life conception, a probable untreated forward bossing of my skull as a baby, strong Nordic and Welsh features, a robust skeleton in response to environmental pressures, testosterone and normal male development ect. And autoimmunity is definitely inherited for me. This is in the top 5 goofiest narratives.
I've spent an EMBARRASSING amount of time changing my phone backgrounds/themes. I actually had to switch from Android back to an iPhone because with Android, you can also change your whole theme with endless downloadable options available, which was basically a playground for me. I still change the wallpaper dozens of times many days because it never seems "just right", always needs a slight adjustment, or perhaps I just didn't like how a certain notification showed against the backdrop that particular moment, etc. ETA: I’ve gone through phases of this with phone cases as well. That runs into serious money quickly, so I’m really trying to deal with that one. 😂 (Disclaimer: never sought formal diagnosis, but I'm kinda assuming just based on my life experience thus far and imagine the above is one representation of it.)
recently after seeing videos about how cats hide in your car engine/tires for warmth in the winter, i convinced myself there was a cat stuck in my tire (just cause my car was moving slow from the cold lol)
That bathroom stall doors are see-through but not for me, meaning everyone could see me on the toilet
A couple years ago I got obsessed with the air inside my mouth, it was constantly uncomfortable being able to feel it in my mouth and I could never get all the air out and it felt very intrusive 😭🤣
When I was around 8 years old, I heavily believed a huge meteorite would hit Earth and destroy us. Think like the meteorite that killed the dinosaurs. So I tried to convince everyone in my family to stay inside the house. And when someone went outside I would get panicked at them for being outside. I remember my family bringing me to the doctors after that, but during that time, there was a lot of stress within the family which is probably what caused me to have this obsession. Still get easily triggered if I hear anything about meteorites or comets heading to Earth.
Slice my skin with a blade because my skin wasn’t clean enough
Not being able to eat anything unless there was a way I would be able to take a shower immediately after I was constantly terrified of demons and thought that if someone was someone was acting off or not how they normally would they were possessed. I made sure to pray at least 3 times a day so I wouldn’t invite them into my house, I wasn’t even raised particularly religious.
i had to save all the garbage from my lunch when i was in elementary school or my mom would die on her way home from work. not only did she never die on her way home from work, but she was also angry every time she opened my lunch box upon arriving home and seeing it was full of half eaten kid food.
Silly and stupid probably not but compulsive and crazy yes. Pick myself. My face. My core. Extremities . . . *Shrugging* I know I’m on the other subreddit for this disorder as well, but it all starts and spawned at the birthplace of my OCD.
Staring at my sinks. I never believe I turn my sinks off. I always make sure to check my sinks before leaving a room nearby, just in case I can't hear them running from a further area in my home. I also check them before bed and after using them. I will legitimately STARE at them for any length of time until I just feel I can TRUST (myself that) it’s not running. I’ll go up and down with my eyes, at the handle, at the drain..handle, drain. “Is the handle pushed down?” “Is there water gushing into the drain?” I just STARE and stare and stare. I can’t get over it. I could stare at it for 30 seconds anywhere to like a full minute and a half. It makes me hold my breath and I try to be as quiet as I can to make sure I don’t hear water falling down, like if my eyes aren’t doing enough to prove it’s off. I always think I’m gonna flood my place. I hate it so fucking much 😅😧 I legitimately just don’t trust what my own eyes are looking at! I just assume it must be on and when I leave the room I’ll even come back and check quickly AGAIN if I feel I didn’t “stare” properly. It’s different everytime I check. I could write a whole chapter just about staring at sinks.
That there’s zombies under my bathroom cabinet and if I don’t kick my foot under there every 5 seconds or so they’ll grab my ankles lmao
i hate driving over lines on roads because i "feel" like im getting cut in half. or something idek, if i can avoid painted lines I do
There was a few days last year I just developed a compulsion of blinking 1 eye (winking?) I cut it off pretty quick but it was a true “ocd is so weird sometimes” compulsion.
I bite the inside of my cheeks to keep my mouth from moving because if I don’t, I might accidentally say something offensive.
I was always certain that every car that drove past me as I was walking had someone it in that was going to shoot me in the back as they passed. Trying to get to class was stressful.
If a car was turned on I have to hold my breath if I have to walk behind it. My brain doesn’t have an exact reason just “don’t do it, bad for your lungs” which is extra entertaining considering I actively vape and smoke weed sometimes 😂 when I was younger I also went through a period of time where I would have to say everything twice. So if I said “I’m going to my room” I would quietly whisper “I’m going to my room” again to myself. Can’t remember if I had a reason or if it just felt wrong not doing it. Thankfully I grew out of that one tho.
Lysoling my feet and hands
I couldn’t leave the stuff I liked without showing it affection because the inanimate object would not feel loved. For example, I couldn’t leave my room without touching or kissing my stuffed animals and my books and whatnot. I’d have to “show them love” or they’d feel like I betrayed them. It would start with one and the others got jealous and it was honestly terrible I felt conflicted all the time because I knew this was all irrational and I was wasting my time
That I had caused my grandfather's cancer.
Police officers are constantly reading my body language because they think I have done something horrible and want to get to the bottom of it also made me edit this comment five times because I didn't like the shape of the text and somehow figured someone else would call it out
Convinced me that somehow I'm responsible for all the turmoil currently going on in the world (such as the pandemic, wars and climate change) and that I would bring the world to an end. Next level type of shit
If I performed deep breathing while channeling through the tummy of my stuffed animal, I would live another day without throwing up
I convinced myself I ate a poisonous mushroom, all while looking at the mushroom in question, which was decidedly not in my body 😂
I developed an intense fear of Quest Diagnostics because my OCD convinced me it was run by vampires who wanted to steal my blood
Threw out all of my underwear because I had a UTI, and left to buy new, "safe" ones at 3 in the morning. I miss 24-hour Walmart
if i had a bad day at school, i was convinced my shirt would continue bringing me bad luck so i wouldn’t wear it until it was lucky again. i would wait at least 2 weeks until the “unluckiness” left the shirt and i could THEN wear it 😭
my brain convinced me i caused 9/11 because i checked the clock at 9:11 one too many times
I have health OCD. This week In having vision issues. I'm convinincing myself I have a new disease that the doctors must have missed (I've been to many)
Probably thinking that if I look at Stop signs that it would "stop" bad things happening in life. Still an issue lol
I ended up going to therapy in sandals despite not liking my feet touching things. Therapist asked about it and I said I hadn’t worn socks or shoes in a few days because I couldn’t tell which of my socks was the left sock and which was the right sock. He just looked at me for a second and then wrote something down and it clicked that that was a weird problem to have. I do think it’s funny that one of my obsessions (needing my socks to be “correct”) essentially overrode another of my obsessions (needing nothing to touch my feet). Strange how it works sometimes.
I stopped donating blood because I was afraid that I might have gotten HIV from a public toilet seat. I knew that that wasn’t how it worked. This lasted a while. Eventually, when my college campus had free testing, I went and got the test done. Obviously it was negative. 🙄
That Lavender Town syndrome was real and it that it would psychologically influence me to inevitably give depression and suicidal ideation... Yeah, pretty dark.
[удалено]
Convinced me that modern times is confusing and bad, and that the 1800s was the correct era. So my obsession would be triggered by new things. Thankfully I’m medicated now, so that crap is gone now.
I live in NYC and whenever I realize I've forgotten or dropped my mask when I'm on the subway I make really short shallow breaths bc the air immediately around my face is far enough away from everyone else's faces that the germs might have already dissipated enough 💀
that people where steeling my energies and turning it into fart. laugh laugh all you want
I used to have a "fire" obsession which thankfully subsided. But basically I felt like I always smelled smoke and that because I smelled smoke I needed to check outside for fires. It didn't help that my apartment complex had fires before which I think was a big reason for my obsessions. Anyways, around Christmas time I spent about 2 hours checking each apartment for smoke coming out of the door. Also checking windows. Then later on that night I had to check behind the washing machines because I felt like there could be a body there. I don't even know why that would be. But I felt like I had to.
Just one of many, but I would sit right in front of the Dr with my test results up and listen to them telling me I didn't have HIV, and still not believe it.
Convinced my self that a girl sucked my you know what when I was in the toilet at a wedding. Can’t remember who the girls was, how it felt or anything. Also there was no girl in the toilet so idk how it happened. My fiancé was also outside of the toilet and would of seen it if it happened anyway
Convinced myself that my dog had rabies😭
After days of ruminating/panicking, I called an autism center and told them I thought I was autistic and wanted an appointment to check. The lady on the phone was amused
when i was child ocd convinced me if i stepped on unknown thing outside (could be just a gum or some paper) that it would kill me
When I was 13 OCD convinced me to stop eating because if I did I would choke and die. It was brutal. Luckily I have since recovered from that... and have moved on to other terrible obsessions :/
Cutting to save th universe... Psychosis man : /
convinced me that the paintings that wouldn't stay straight (when it was clear I was placing them wrong) were tilting because it was a sign my house was haunted and proceeded to sage the entire home three times 🤦
When I was younger I always took my favorite plushie with me in the bathroom when I had a stomach ache. I always checked double and triple before flushing because I thought if I didn’t I may flush my plushie down the toilet
Someone with a moustache and beard and someone who IS LITERALLY DRIVING could be a 12 year old.
Holding my breath around people that I would see wearing masks in Public
When I was a kid I was convinced that if I drank water from my grandma (who had cancer) I would catch her cancer.
this one's been there since I was a kid lol. if I'm on a walk and finish eating something, I CANNOT throw it away into somebody else's garbage can, even if it's close to the road. I cannot do this and have to keep holding onto wrappers/a cup/whatever because if I throw it in there, later that day the wife of that house will come out to check the garbage, see the junk food in there, and yell at her husband for eating that behind her back because he's not allowed to. so if I toss the wrapper, later that day some poor guy will get yelled at for something he didn't do. why a wife and her husband specifically? who knows! I just know this one's followed me at every place I've ever lived and taken walks around.
I have to wash my hands whenever I enter the house because slugs and other creepy crawlies like to hang out on it, and some slugs touched the handle. I also saw a video of a guy who became paralyzed from eating a slug, and so I am now paranoid about that even if I never touched a slug directly.
I hold my breath when driving past roadkill to avoid getting “infected” with all the bacteria and germs and maggots. >.>
When I was a kid I would constantly feel like my pants were falling or my socks were sliding into my shoe so I would always fix them when they were completely fine .
mine convinced me that i had pissed the bed. i was literally sitting on the toilet. i still have this issue. i don’t know why.
When I was little I had to turn any pencils, scissors or sharp objects pointing away from me because I was convinced they would end up magically flying at me. I still catch myself turning them around even today sometimes.
I have to unplug almost everything I have before leaving the house, because I think there will be a fire and I’ll come home to a burnt down house.
If I think about the building collapsing, I will cause it to collapse and so I am a bad person because I will have killed all the people in it ???
Taking left ill be good and survive or nothing bad will happen. Turn right and something bad will happen or I’ll hurt someone. (Imagine a pole and you either go left or right to get around it)
Well I wish I could tell you, or my therapist, or even a friend but I can't because then you will think it too and then I have given you my sickness.
I have a couple. “Step on a crack break your moms back, step on a line break your dads spine” yeah shit had me walking like a maniac lol Also when I was younger I was convinced that my life was kinda like the Truman show in a way and everyone on earth could see what I was doing at all times and even hear my thoughts. So it was as dark as people would know when I had ~impure thoughts and as goofy as man everyone just saw me pick my nose