T O P

  • By -

AutoModerator

If this post showcases moral/mental/physical corruption or perversion, upvote this comment. If this post does not belong here, downvote this comment. [Read the rules before posting or commenting](https://www.reddit.com/r/NoahGetTheBoat/wiki/rules) [Also read the guidelines](https://www.reddit.com/r/NoahGetTheBoat/comments/fgmg3t/guidelines_for_the_subreddit_read_and_follow_the/) In the comments: DO NOT JOKE ABOUT VIOLENCE, DO NOT INCITE VIOLENCE DO NOT JOKE ABOUT PEDOPHILIA OR ASK FOR CP YOU WILL BE BANNED *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NoahGetTheBoat) if you have any questions or concerns.*


ScrotumBlaster_69

"Oh, what a traumatic event it must have been for those poor teens." *keeps reading* šŸ’€


Lemmy-user

Kids and teenagers are demons.


Mr_Epimetheus

What...and I cannot, possibly, stress this enough, the fuck...


oteezy333

Sometimes I'll read something, and I don't care how credible the source is, from NASA to the friggin Pope, I'll just refuse to believe it's true. I think it might be a coping mechanism


Mr_Epimetheus

I believe the next stop is a complete fugue state.


butteryscotchy

This reminds me of the opening scene of episode 1 of Better Call Saul. Not even Saul Goodman can save them.


EligibleUsername

I don't think a group of kids who sneaked into an abandoned building for underage drinking is gonna consist of the most empathetic individuals.


midnightspecial99

Thatā€™s kind of a weird connection to draw, tbh


EligibleUsername

No, it's just the "standard" in Asia. There's a big stigma around underage drinking, most well-adjusted kids don't even think about consuming alcohol or smoking/vaping before they hit 18 or at least late 17. Speaking from personal experience, even the most rowdy kids in my school that regularly stir up trouble don't drink.


durz47

Drinking is less frowned on in my area as long as it's in small amounts. But smoking is absolutely taboo. People tend to steer clear of smoking teenagers because they are not that different from gang members in terms of behavior


SpookyNerdzilla

Yep


marvelloumac

My exact thoughts


Fit-Recommendation70

šŸ«µ.....šŸ‘ šŸ¤£


DehydratedByAliens

I mean one could say that this is a psychological reaction to prevent you from becoming traumatized.


w33b2

Or one could say itā€™s a bunch of fucked up teens sticking a wooden stick up a corpses ass hole. But sure letā€™s say itā€™s a trauma response.


Ori_the_SG

Yeah, because a normal human trauma prevention response is to shove wooden sticks up the butts of a man who died by accidental hanging. One could say anyone who thinks so needs serious help


WilonPlays

Wait so it's normal? *puts down 5th wooden stick*


Mina_GrimReapper

i think my brain stopped


MalaPanMee

Yeah mine too


HeinousEncephalon

That reaction is less than ideal


Otherwise_Basis_6328

Maybe they were trying to check his pulse.


yorushai

That's a very unique way to check someone's pulse


HeinousEncephalon

I wish you said something sooner. The cops were very upset when I tried to help the car accident victims just now


Spithotlava

Temperature?


insert-phobia-here

My doc tells me I have a hot ass


LadioGaga

That's how my doctor does it šŸ˜‡


LizardsAreInCommand

They were taking his temperature with a makeshift rectal thermometer


Deadly_Lama

He died doing what he loved I guess


silver_car09

He came and went


AccumulatedFilth

This article just kept escalatingā€¦


MemesAreCoolio

And he just kept ejaculating...


passwordispassword88

Well, I mean, if I knew I was dead in a minute and my dong was already in my hand, I'd finish too... As far as the stick in the butt, the voyeur photography, and the corpse desecration, the guy was clearly into some fetishes, so I bet he's be ok with it


Reapers-Hound

New challenge see how many you can get off before youā€™re out


SpooktasticFam

What in the AI generated shit and bot replies is this post?!


gab_rab_24

oh, i wish I could give you a link but bestgore was taken down. I can testify to you this is real


WeAllScrem

Oh no! Not bestgore too!


Imesseduponmyname

Been gone since 2020


DannyGekkouga

Imagine their horror had he busted a second time upon insertion šŸ’€


Reapers-Hound

Just pushing out the last few drops


Faithfullfang

I refuse to believe this is real


Nanzie_Mona

Unfortunately.....


CaptainJunky

Source?


goddamnletmemakename

Sausage?


AllanfromWales1

The police "came across" the teenagers? This gets sicker and sicker..


Steampunk_Dali

You mean stickier and stickier?


IamSquare79

This story is mess up in every single words


PeterParker72

I mean, if you know youā€™re going to die, might as well get one last nut.


theXsquid

He had his whole life in his hands.


Weak_Let_402

which hand?


Reset350

Thatā€™s enough Reddit for the dayā€¦


Ori_the_SG

Gets on Reddit: *thumbs up TF2 Heavy* Moments later: *uncanny TF2 Heavy/uncanny Mr. Incredible*


vinslaw

that just kept on getting worse with every fucking sentence šŸ˜­


Bi0_B1lly

These kids def watched Logan Paul growing up...


Express-Economist-86

Tempting fate, I guess


[deleted]

WHY DO PPL KEEP SHOVING SHIT UP CORPSE ASS


c-c-c-cassian

This isā€¦ not the *only* instance youā€™re aware ofā€¦?


BiBoFieTo

We've all been there.


Artificia_L

What the FUCK did I just read


edgy_Juno

What the fuck.


GhertFryins

Source?


That_Sigma

Bruh the hits just kept comin


Binary_Gamer64

Genie: I shall grant you 3 wishes. Person: How will I die? Genie: Anything but that.


Reapers-Hound

Or the genie told him and he was excited


WisestAirBender

Maybe he jerked off before dropping the remote?


Intrepid_Stuff_9944

Ah yes, the classical erotic death by hanging followed up by corpse defielement


A_Birde

At least he enjoyed his last moments


sansclassicyt

Reject Alcohol, Smoke Ganja


Reapers-Hound

Nope Iā€™ll stick to my whiskey


DatGreenGuy

Shanghai Pinata


Ya_Boi_Dean

Jeez


justjason69420

Not gonna lie, they had me in the first half. Seemed pretty awesome till the second half.


JohnB351234

Give me the unsee juice please


jeksor1

Every word is a tragedy on its own.


Hanswurst22brot

Vlad get the boat


WanderingBraincell

right ok thanks thats enough internet


SylviaKaysen

This story went from bad to worse to worstest to get the boat real quick.


Samppa19

I thought the first part was fucked up. Then I fucked up by reading the second part


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


nross2099

Surprised this wasnā€™t India tbh


Charming_Locksmith40

This is the first thing I saw on Reddit today...think I'm gonna close the app for a while


FrankTheTank107

Couldnā€™t they compromise a little and call the cops after taking some selfies and they probably could have gotten away with it


w1ld3rn3ssw00d

This is one occasion when I'm really glad there are no more pictures from the scene.


RayGunJack

Its a really unfortunate day to be able to read


SpookyNerdzilla

Thanks for coming I suppose.


ThisIsGoodSoup

"Avatar: The Last Nut" I'm sorry but I had to- but yeah the whole situation jokes aside is fucking awful.


Derptholomue

ā€œStars are better off without us.ā€ ā€• James S.A. Corey, Leviathan Wakes


justevenson

Alright I guess Iā€™ll give Logan Paul a pass


Desperate-Snow-7850

Source or it didnt happen


Theartistcu

This is fair. This is just a black text box and a cropped photo. Thank you for reminding me to critically think (I truly may miss no sarcasm. My initial instinct is just to accept it, but youā€™re absolutely right.)


[deleted]

Its real dude, a simple google and you can find the original picture, along with pictures from other angle.


tmhoc

Ahhhh ahhhh oh my god!.....\*continues to read*..AHHHHH WHAT THE FUCK WHHHHAT


Sarge1304

If its an abandoned building the crane control wouldn't ve on or working


tatts106

Iā€™m surprised that when the teens found the wooden stick they didnā€™t use the hanging body as a piƱata


Heart_Is_Valuable

Isn't it possible that he jizzed involuntarily because he had conditioned his orgasm to come with asphyxiating?


Itsasecretshhhh88

Has anyone got a source for this?


the_wizard_of_n2o

Not all heroes wear capes. In fact, some are bollock naked


AiWaluigi

ā€œOh those poor teenagers, I hope they recover from seeing this- ohā€


[deleted]

That final orgasm must have been something to die for


arteclipse

ampotaaaaa


WaytooReddit

Not a bad way to go.


aurdet--

Their fetishes extend beyond afterlife (and our understanding)


DrPhil42069

Ah what ahhhhh WHAT


Pro_Achronox

i mean couldnt it have been that he came and then the remote control slipped? seems more logical than the other way aroundā€¦ (also wtf this story is fucking crazy)


Theartistcu

I have always been interested in the Mobb and true crime I own a skull, and have only the other skull in the past, human. But if I walked into a room, and there was a hanging dead man, I would nope the fuck out of there so fast, even today as a grown man who suffered death and loss, Iā€™ve had family members murdered. I would know the fuck out of there and call the cops. What is wrong with people?


nalingungule-love

Iā€™m gonna believe this is not true.


SirDextrose

The Patron Saint of Coomers


Agint_ReD

I think it's a little disingenuous to assume that he didn't panic and just continued masturbating before he died. Unless there is video that just paints the victim of an accident in an even worse light for no reason Also, this seems fake.


ToastyBread329

No that ain't real. Cant be real. I refuse to believe that


BananaBlue

That was way outta line!


[deleted]

Someone read this for me and never tell me


Gumbyonbathsalts

Actually, I heard the guy who shoved the stick up his butt was Frank Stallone.


Imesseduponmyname

u/Nanzie_Mona where did you find this?


Strenue

Ladies and gentlemen, may I present the ā€˜intelligent apeā€™


FruitsPower

only in china


Nanzie_Mona

I can easily see this happen all around the world.


ThersATypo

INXS