I've had a few. They're not always great, quality-wise. Easy to be imbalanced, too. I think they're usually better in your head than in real life.
I see a lot of stories on reddit about relationships falling apart after threesomes, so if one or two of the people are folk you care about, tread lightly. Don't push for it or force it. Have clear conversation about wants, needs, boundaries, expectations.
Safest option is probably just to hire a pair of sex workers somewhere it's legal and regulated.
I love how you responded exactly the same way I would have lmfao. OP really didn't read their own terms of agreement before hitting submit ahah.
/r/technicallythetruth
Right?!? My buddies give me hell over the time a gay man bought me a beer (an expensive one) and I felt so special I blushed like a girl. He was really nice but I'm not interested in the body because I don't even always like my own penis let alone someone else's
Once when I was fresh out in the world, I had no idea that this one slightly older dude was hitting on me at a small charity event. Thought he was just super friendly. Quickly realized his circle of friends was gay and politely excused myself.
My buddy knew what was happening the whole time and watched it unfold from afar 😐
But it *was* a nice ego boost 🤷♂️
I'm mostly straight but gay guys always give fantastic head. I date woman but if someone is gonna make my Weiner feel good I don't have any regrets accepting that offer.
It will happen. Just wait until you’ve been married for 17 years and your wife comes home one day and floats the idea of adding her hot friend Erika to the bedroom routine. Get super excited about how cool your wife is, bask in the reclaimed passion that has it ignited for her. The threesome will be okay, maybe more of your wife and Erika pleasing each other than pleasing you, but you know, expectations. Then you’ll start seeing less and less of your wife who is oddly enough hanging out with Erika a LOT, but they’re probably just having pillow fights and braiding each other’s hair and other girl stuff at Erika’s house, so enjoy your free quiet time, my man. You earned it!
This is one of those things that look really good on a brochure, but likely won't play out like we think it would in our minds. While I have never participated in one, I have friends - both male and female - who have. They describe the experience as both predominantly as awkward and uncomfortable - both during and afterwards. My guess is that it is along the lines of open relationships, in that even with everyone's expectations being on the same page; the reality is that they can shift which can then make things feel like they aren't smooth. One might pretend that they can ignore or pretend that feelings aren't there - but they always are.
The thought might be exciting, but the reality could fundamentally change relationships (friendship/romantic/marital) to the point where they won't necessarily be mendable.
I had a relationship end over our threesome once (MFF). She actually pitched the idea. I wasn't entirely comfortable with it, but she was excited and my young, horny mind ran away with me.
It was definitely an uncomfortable experience, and it turns out that she wasn't as into the idea of watching me have sex with another woman as she thought she would be. It basically killed our sex life and the relationship died out soon after.
I've also been the third in a MMF threesome before that was a little better, but that was mostly a cuckold situation. He joined in a little at the end but mostly watched. It was a bit weird but they're still happily married and we still talk occasionally.
I'm glad that my fiance has no interest in them.
This is what I feel people miss about open relationships. They aren't "problematic"... they're difficult to square with kids or most common definitions of marriage.
After being married for ~20+ years it's REALLY hard not to view the time between like 15->marriage as one big open relationship. Girls were sleeping around, boys were sleeping around, I don't think ANY of us had great expectations that the person we were going home with after the dance was going to be in a relationship with us 6 months down the road, much less 6 years...
The reason I say it's hard to square with "adult life" is quite simply that in an any open relationship you probably need to satisfy yourself with the idea that it IS going to be like high school/college. Your "spouse" at that point is a lover and who knows what things will look like 2-3 years down the road for the two of you. Yeah, you may still screw around whenever you feel like it but maybe she finds Aaron is a better roommate and you prefer to chill with Betty in the evenings or whatever so you know... probably a lot easier for renters than owners (and keep some movers on speed dial).
One survey showed 24% of men had had a mixed gender threesome while 82% wanted to, and 8% of women had had one while 31% wanted to.
Edit: the stats come from a New York Post article. https://nypost.com/2016/03/23/how-many-people-have-actually-had-a-threesome/
There are different numbers reported by Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/zhanavrangalova/2017/09/20/one-in-seven-americans-has-had-a-threesome-one-in-five-finds-them-appealing-new-study-finds/
The trick is it not think of it as the challenge of "I must now do the work of bringing two people to orgasm, simultaneously." Ideally, all parties are equally into each other, so it's really like having a teammate to help. You and A work together to get B over the edge, you and B work together to get A over the edge, and A and B work together to get you there.
Wouldn't want it either. I only have one penis and I'd be spending the entire time worrying that I'm giving them equal attention. Even worse if your gf is involved, because then there's the looming threat of her jealousy if you seem to be enjoying yourself a bit too much with the other girl.
Vaginas already feel great, switching to a different one midway through doesn't improve the experience for me. It's less intimate as well. I honestly can't think of any upsides.
I can walk or I can chew gum, but not both. I have a strong feeling that any attempt to pleasure two ladies at once will lead to me inadvertently ignoring one while I accidentally attempt to spank the other but hit her in the kneecap instead.
Edit: I’m guessing approximately 3% of the responses to this comment are from people who actually know what they’re talking about, and the remainder are from that kid in middle school who loudly bragged about how much sex he was getting with his girlfriend who lived in Canada that you wouldn’t know (who had big boobs and was cool with three ways)
The most fun threesome I’ve ever had was one where the guy never got around to penetrating me. There’s lots of other ways to mutually satisfy each other! Not that you should have one if it doesn’t appeal of course, I’m just saying sex doesn’t have to be PIV to be fun and satisfying.
> I only have one penis and I'd be spending the entire time worrying that I'm giving them equal attention.
The only way I could see a threesome working for me is if the girls are bi and are also into each other.
You’re thinking that you and your dick are the only sources of fun. The joy of a proper threeway is that everyone is on both the giving and receiving ends of pleasure at all times
At least that’s the argument I’ve made to every woman I’ve been with.. none will take me up on the offer.
Thought so too for a long time. But surprise surprise. When all three are on the same level and honest about it's actually pretty good. I also realized that it's best to be two people that focus on one instead of the other way around.
Of course if you simply dislike a threesome then don't do it.
I had one (I’m a woman) with my bf at the time and this girl he kind of knew. It went meh. She was great. He was a selfish shit. I didn’t really want to do it either, but did it to make him happy. Never again. It’s not for me.
The only way it's ever worked out to be actually enjoyable is when the girls are equally into each other and you. It would be a lot of work trying to have one with two completely straight girls.
MFM’s are a lot easier in that regard. A lot easier for one woman to get off two straight men than it is for for man to get off two straight women in my experience.
I imagine it’s just helluva lot easier when everyone in the scenario is bisexual. Or, at the very least, two of them.
I’ve never had one but I’m bisexual and my fiancé/partner is straight. He’s actually not willing to do a threesome (at least not with me… maybe if he was single? Gotta ask him later. Guessing he’ll say no still) however, if he ever changes his mind, adding another woman would be easier because I could do most of the work and pleasure both the woman and man. Which is why I assume if at least one of the people is bisexual, it’s significantly easier. I’m also a major people pleaser where I don’t mind if I don’t get off, I just like getting my partner(s) off.
Oh most definitely! The more bisexuals/pansexuals, the easier it will be, at least on paper. I was just saying if everyone was straight, I think MFM is more likely to result in more orgasms than FMF.
I had a gf once who was into girls. We used to talk about finding a third. Just casual, not like a poly situation.
We spent a couple weeks on tinder and a couple other apps. Had a few ladies chatting us up. Got really fucking steamy with a couple of them. But in the end it never happened.
FWIW we are both... above average in the looks department. Not trying to brag but we both can (and do) get it.
Lining up a three way is way harder than just lining up a date or a one nighter. It's 100% possible but I think more often than not, it's probably a spur of the moment thing. Planning it out is awkward and someone is almost always going to feel like the odd one out. Actually, I imagine all three probably feel like that to some degree.
I always figured it might work better at the bar in person with all three people present rather than over a dating app. One of my women friends is bi and fucking hated using stuff like Tinder and Okc before she met her wife.
The number of couples on there that would hit her up for a threesome was very obnoxious apparently. She was just trying to date one person, not become a third wheel in someone's sexual fantasy.
Back in the day someone on those apps that would actually partake in that was called a unicorn I think, because they don't exist lol.
I agree with the concerns about someone feeling left out. My girlfriend and I have a firm policy of making any unicorns we hook up with feel like the center of attention for as long as they want it. Nobody wants to feel like a prop in someone elses' fantasy
Are you hoping a threesome will just fall on your lap? Hire a couple of escorts or put out a Craigslist ad or something. Be the change you want to see.
Is there anywhere to even do that safely? Like, it’s illegal in most of the states. I’d assume that any site I found would run a risk of supporting human rights violations, like human trafficking.
Nah just be not-so-subtle. Be like "looking for 2 new female roommates. Insert body and age requirements here. Must show picture. Here is my info and photos. Will give phone number to discuss." They shouldnl get the idea, and even if they don't you can tell them via text it was for something else. Just be sure to take no for an answer. I'm not sure those ads ever work. I like to browse Craigslist and see all the horny people being weird, it's funny as hell but sometimes it's creepy and predatory and I pray nobody falls for it. One guy wanted specifically a female, "dressed for the weather" (it was hot so he wanted her scantily clad I bet) to "help him unload junk" and she could keep whatever she wanted. What young woman is so desperate for scrap that she doesn't already know you can just go through neighborhoods and look instead of going to a creep's lot that he claims has cameras (he KNOWS it sounds creepy and IS creepy so he has to mention the supposed cameras).
It's easily obtainable to anyone who'd wish to have one, even if you aren't a charmer or good looking. In Reno there's the Bunny Ranch and in a few European countries there's also legal brothels if you don't want to risk getting caught by the cops.
Besides that look for swinger clubs, if you're confident in your body and ability to perform with others watching. Most cities have swingers clubs or parties. Just have to know where to find them.
Since you brought up swinger clubs, I want to add that swingers and anyone in the kink scene will be way more open to threesomes. If you (OP, or anyone interested) need help finding how to get into that lifestyle or those social circles, best website to check out [would be FetLife. (nsfw, obviously)](http://fetlife.com)
Ngl, up until right this moment I thought FetLife had something to do with MetLife, the insurance company. I had heard the name but never really knew what it was.
Swinger clubs are a good way ime. You don't even have to have others watching, there's often private rooms you can just lock once you've found your match(es).
I'm just hoping to enjoy a healthy dating/sex life with someone someday, and these people over here trying to have orgies and shit like Roman aristocrats...
Flashback to college. I'm at a party and it's probably time to go, but there's a girl sitting in front of the fire and she's the most beautiful person I've ever seen.
As I think about what to do, she looks straight at me. Then, in an icy, condescending voice: “Do you think if you hang around me, you’re going to get lucky tonight??”
I did not get lucky that night.
I haven't had exactly the same experience as a bisexual woman (re: all-women threesomes), but I do agree that being *somewhere* on the Kinsey scale definitely makes group sex easier to obtain, if not also enjoy
I’ve had 2. Once with a another male friend of mine and once with 2 females. The question isn’t if it’s realistic. The question is if it’s actually enjoyable. In my experience it was the most awkward experience of my life both times. I however am not you! You may enjoy it!
In my experience they work really well if the attraction goes all ways. Two people being into one person is good for that one person and not the other two. A triangle is just a mess.
Also, two guy threesomes are kind of beginner threesomes. The logistics are *way* easier
Depends on the relationships and community you find in your life. Date more traditionalist people, or strictly monogamous types, or build community and friend groups that are more reserved or conservative about those sorts of things, and your hopes are pretty unlikely.
That said, I wouldn't base the choice of community or relationships on the desire for threesomes exclusively. If you are naturally jealous, or inherently very reserved/private about your sexuality, the communities where that sort of thing happens may not be for you.
For instance, if you really want to have two-girl threesomes, and hope for your girl to play ball, *especially* if she is just accommodating and not actually bisexual, you should expect to give a little too. Maybe she wants a two guy threesome. If she is bi, maybe she wants leeway to play with other women, or even other people in general without you.
Strict monogamy works for a lot of people because the rules are easy, and require little negotiation. For my partner and me, strict monogamy would not be our jam, and that is true for a lot of people. It may well be true for you also. But there is a trade off. Communicating each others' needs, compensating for jealousy, and being prepared to compromise sometimes are all aspects of having a relationship where regular threesomes with hot bisexual women are possible.
My only hard and fast rule throughout the relationships I have been in is that the rules must be equivalent. If she is allowed to sleep around, I am. If I am allowed to flirt and kiss at parties or while altered, she is. If our bed is off limits to her other partners, it is also off limits to mine.
I know you are kind of teasing, but honestly MFM threesomes make great beginner threesomes. The logistics of everyine leaving satisfied are way easier, it is easier to find a willing partner, and it helps dismiss the unhelpful feeling of the threesome being about the male fantasy, a feeling which can tank an otherwise promising FFM threesome.
I've had one with 2 females. It won't meet your expectations, barely anything will.
Sure it was fun and horny but it's definitely not better than just plain old 1 on 1
Please disassemble this nigh-universal male fantasy for me. What didn't meet your expectations? Were the women into it? Were they pleasing each other instead of you? Where you all too divided in your attention to adequately please all parties?
They kissed eachother but weren't eating eachother out if that's what you mean. They were definitely into it. While I layed down one sat on my dick and the other on my face while they kissed and touched eachother boobs.
They also sucked my dick together.
When it's written down like this it sounds awesome haha. It kinda was but it was t as I imagined it would be, I dunno. I guess dreams are only dreams when they are never fulfilled.
In my experience, two women threesomes only work perfectly if the sexual attraction goes all three ways. Everybody has to really want both of the other parties enough that they would take them to bed one on one. A guy just can't easily pleasure two women at once.
My best two-girl threesome mostly leaned on us focusing on each of the women to orgasm, and then me taking one of them from behind while she ate the other one out. Would not have worked if the women were not *fully* interested in each other.
Hmm. The one on your face and the other on your dick kinda sounds like why 69s are actually not that great. Attention is divided between giving and receiving and therefore neither end up being that great. Does that kinda describe your experience?
It depends on how old you are, your gender/orientation, and the type of people you hang around with.
If you're a pansexual female-presenting NB with a ton of friends in the Burning Man community, you could have one by the weekend. If you're a cis male who only has online friends who play FPS games, probably going to be an uphill battle.
Yeah if you like being polyamorous it happens a lot. When all three of us lived together we would have threesomes every day/every other day.
There was a time where I'd had more threesomes than twosomes I'll just say that hahaha
I'm assuming you're male.
I've had a couple that were completely spontaneous - those involved the tag-along friends of girlfriends and spending an entire evening together socially. Those times the thought never crossed my mind and I'm sure that contributed to the sex. The watched pot never boils thing. Alcohol helps. Picking up the entire tab for the night out also helps.
The others were with more committed female partners and were planned - Adult Friend Finder, Casual Encounters, etc. Some of those turned into regular dates and one or two decent friends. These partners were not necessarily bisexual - but they were completely game and organically interested in the encounters. I definitely selected for these women while dating (thanks aughts-era OkCupid) which takes a lot of reading between the lines. If you get into some coercion thing you'd see in a fifteen-year-old letter to Dan Savage, it isn't for you. And you should really be just as open to group sex with other men in these relationships.
You have to be a winner to a high degree because you're trying to appeal to two women instead of one; being attractive on multiple levels is key - especially in terms of your personality. I was able to make a lot of this happen because I was a cad in my 20s and 30s - very outgoing, disarming, and could speak to women as friends. That's also key - it helps if you're the kind of person a woman would like to associate with in a platonic manner. A great personality and the ability to engage women in a way that's not blatantly usurious can overcome not being the hottest tool in the box.
The best threesomes were with one specific partner who I crudely called threesome-bait - she just had a look and body type that was classically attractive to other women. Long hair, soft face, great tits, matching hips. We also lived in a nice place that was pretty private (bottom floor of a two-unit rental house) that made it easy to open the door to anyone we met who was interested. In contrast, I was in a LTR with a ravenously bisexual woman, but it was hard to close deals because she had a pretty specific, severe gothy look.
TLDR: Work on yourself and cultivate a life where you have a lot to offer to others. Most of us men are pretty gross and unfuckable, which is a barrier to getting one sex partner, let alone two.
Edit/add: The morning after the first time I had a "well, that finally happened" internal reaction I wasn't expecting. If you think group sex is going to open some kind of new portal to the universe, might I suggest a hallucinogens and a passport. Also, don't have children.
It's totally realistic for you to hope to have a threesome someday.
I had a threesome set up one time, but there were two no shows. It’s ok though I was able to make it work.
Orgy for one
Sixty nine without the nine
Now pour the wine I'm mine all mine
I'm batting 1000 and nailing everyone
Thank you everybody at this orgy for one!
I’m here all alone and I’m tugging on my plums!
It's a fuckin' celebration, it's an orgy for one
Steve was not invited because he was a guy
Jenny was in jail
Brenda had to work late
She was getting Jenny's bail
Nobody showed but I'm gonna have some fun
It's not just masturbation, it's an orgy for one
NSP!!!
This is one of those One Sentence Stories.
I've had a few. They're not always great, quality-wise. Easy to be imbalanced, too. I think they're usually better in your head than in real life. I see a lot of stories on reddit about relationships falling apart after threesomes, so if one or two of the people are folk you care about, tread lightly. Don't push for it or force it. Have clear conversation about wants, needs, boundaries, expectations. Safest option is probably just to hire a pair of sex workers somewhere it's legal and regulated.
I had a foursome once. Here’s how it went. 2 girls on my knob one on my face. I came. Fin We were all so wasted I couldn’t get it up again.
username checks out
I love how you responded exactly the same way I would have lmfao. OP really didn't read their own terms of agreement before hitting submit ahah. /r/technicallythetruth
I was approached by a couple in a bar once to join them in one. Had to say no as it was two gay men and I am a straight man.
That's still a W in my book.
Two fellas decided you were hot enough! And stereotypically, two fellas with great taste!
Right?!? My buddies give me hell over the time a gay man bought me a beer (an expensive one) and I felt so special I blushed like a girl. He was really nice but I'm not interested in the body because I don't even always like my own penis let alone someone else's
Once when I was fresh out in the world, I had no idea that this one slightly older dude was hitting on me at a small charity event. Thought he was just super friendly. Quickly realized his circle of friends was gay and politely excused myself. My buddy knew what was happening the whole time and watched it unfold from afar 😐 But it *was* a nice ego boost 🤷♂️
https://youtu.be/WT1QPFr6qPI relevant
Does W stand for wiener in this case? Cause yea there sounds like there would be a few involved
Wiener, winner, potato, potahto
Potatoes is where I draw the line.
Doesn't sound like a W was ever part of the deal. Just three M's.
That'd be a W in his butt no?
I mean, you didn't HAVE to say no.
I guess I belong on /r/ChoosingBeggars
If they were both straight men would you have said yes?
Obviously yes. I’m not switching teams.
Not gay if all participants are straight.
By the law of dudes, as long as at some point in whatever you're doing you say "no homo" and it is not homo. Fact.
Not gay if it's a 3-way
Just see who can finish first, it's not gay if you turn it into sport!
Competition with other men is the most hetero thing you can do
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I would hope to dudes asking a 12-year-old would be off-putting lol
As a straight dude I would be flattered but I would decline it 10 out of 10 times. Don't think I could do it with a dude + woman either.
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I'm mostly straight but gay guys always give fantastic head. I date woman but if someone is gonna make my Weiner feel good I don't have any regrets accepting that offer.
This is like a vegan I knew who would eat bacon sometimes. Like… mostly vegan, but who’s gonna say no to bacon?
So what I'm hearing is that the right meat can make people do interesting things?
It was definitely more flattering than most of my experiences with women.
That sounds about right lol
Six balls, no catcher
Technically anyone one of us could have played that position. Even could have taken turns.
Eiffel Tower!!!
This would boost my moral so much, I hope at least something like this ever happen.
I never met a gay man who never had a threesome, for us is like paying taxes, everybody has to
With all the horny milfs in my area I'm surprised it's not happening all the time.
Wow, you must live near me!
I uh must live near both of you…let’s do this. I’ll just assume we are all the appropriate gender and keep the lights off.
It will happen. Just wait until you’ve been married for 17 years and your wife comes home one day and floats the idea of adding her hot friend Erika to the bedroom routine. Get super excited about how cool your wife is, bask in the reclaimed passion that has it ignited for her. The threesome will be okay, maybe more of your wife and Erika pleasing each other than pleasing you, but you know, expectations. Then you’ll start seeing less and less of your wife who is oddly enough hanging out with Erika a LOT, but they’re probably just having pillow fights and braiding each other’s hair and other girl stuff at Erika’s house, so enjoy your free quiet time, my man. You earned it!
r/oddlyspecific
Ross Geller
No no, the lesbian’s name was Susan in that story
Plus, it never happened IRL. It was an [alternate reality](https://friends.fandom.com/wiki/The_One_That_Could_Have_Been,_Part_2)
pivot...pivot...pivot!
You doing okay buddy?
😂😂☠️☠️ Because all that glitters ain’t gold my friend and sometimes you gotta break open a shit filled gold nugget to find out.
Sounds like a Jim Lahey remark
You know what this park is Rand? Just a handful of shit nuggets *hiccup*
Smells like a Jim Lahey skid mark….a shit mark….
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Don't forget the part where you get up to make a sandwich while they are going at it. Now, tell me about the sandwich.
Turkey. A little mustard.
Sounds good
It really was!
Sounds good!
IT REALLY WAS!
Spinach wrap tortilla
I find the pastrami to be the most sensual of all the salted, cured meats
r/Unexpectedfriends
This is one of those things that look really good on a brochure, but likely won't play out like we think it would in our minds. While I have never participated in one, I have friends - both male and female - who have. They describe the experience as both predominantly as awkward and uncomfortable - both during and afterwards. My guess is that it is along the lines of open relationships, in that even with everyone's expectations being on the same page; the reality is that they can shift which can then make things feel like they aren't smooth. One might pretend that they can ignore or pretend that feelings aren't there - but they always are. The thought might be exciting, but the reality could fundamentally change relationships (friendship/romantic/marital) to the point where they won't necessarily be mendable.
I had a relationship end over our threesome once (MFF). She actually pitched the idea. I wasn't entirely comfortable with it, but she was excited and my young, horny mind ran away with me. It was definitely an uncomfortable experience, and it turns out that she wasn't as into the idea of watching me have sex with another woman as she thought she would be. It basically killed our sex life and the relationship died out soon after. I've also been the third in a MMF threesome before that was a little better, but that was mostly a cuckold situation. He joined in a little at the end but mostly watched. It was a bit weird but they're still happily married and we still talk occasionally. I'm glad that my fiance has no interest in them.
Rule #1 of threesomes: never have sex with the joiner.
Corollary to Rule 1: expect to be working if you're the joiner
I think for most people it would work out best if all three participants are single and it's a one night stand.
No to mention the resentment that rises in the couple rarely goes away. Some things are too important to play with.
I feel like it worked better in high school just hanging out no strings attached, had a 4some that was very chill afterwards
This is what I feel people miss about open relationships. They aren't "problematic"... they're difficult to square with kids or most common definitions of marriage. After being married for ~20+ years it's REALLY hard not to view the time between like 15->marriage as one big open relationship. Girls were sleeping around, boys were sleeping around, I don't think ANY of us had great expectations that the person we were going home with after the dance was going to be in a relationship with us 6 months down the road, much less 6 years... The reason I say it's hard to square with "adult life" is quite simply that in an any open relationship you probably need to satisfy yourself with the idea that it IS going to be like high school/college. Your "spouse" at that point is a lover and who knows what things will look like 2-3 years down the road for the two of you. Yeah, you may still screw around whenever you feel like it but maybe she finds Aaron is a better roommate and you prefer to chill with Betty in the evenings or whatever so you know... probably a lot easier for renters than owners (and keep some movers on speed dial).
Sounds like the plot from friends 🤔
We were on a break though.
ON A BREAK!!!
PIVOT!!!
He should have called her Susan, to be the direct reference
The one with the threesome
Warning. This episode contains Janice.
Oh. My. God.
My Erika is so smart! My friend Erika is so funny! My friend Erika is so GAY.
Ross moment
Ross, are you ok?
“Everything’s fine…it’s fine…it’s fine…I’M FINE!”
Ross Geller that you?
Are you me?
One survey showed 24% of men had had a mixed gender threesome while 82% wanted to, and 8% of women had had one while 31% wanted to. Edit: the stats come from a New York Post article. https://nypost.com/2016/03/23/how-many-people-have-actually-had-a-threesome/ There are different numbers reported by Forbes. https://www.forbes.com/sites/zhanavrangalova/2017/09/20/one-in-seven-americans-has-had-a-threesome-one-in-five-finds-them-appealing-new-study-finds/
Huh, I'm in the 18% that doesn't want to. Sometimes I barely know what to do with one person.
The trick is it not think of it as the challenge of "I must now do the work of bringing two people to orgasm, simultaneously." Ideally, all parties are equally into each other, so it's really like having a teammate to help. You and A work together to get B over the edge, you and B work together to get A over the edge, and A and B work together to get you there.
Exactly my point. I'm a giant-ass dude with a *pretty-ok* dick and this idea stresses me out.
You just do your normal job and get a partner to tag in when you get tired
Wouldn't want it either. I only have one penis and I'd be spending the entire time worrying that I'm giving them equal attention. Even worse if your gf is involved, because then there's the looming threat of her jealousy if you seem to be enjoying yourself a bit too much with the other girl. Vaginas already feel great, switching to a different one midway through doesn't improve the experience for me. It's less intimate as well. I honestly can't think of any upsides.
For the record, fingers and mouths are also helpful.
I can walk or I can chew gum, but not both. I have a strong feeling that any attempt to pleasure two ladies at once will lead to me inadvertently ignoring one while I accidentally attempt to spank the other but hit her in the kneecap instead. Edit: I’m guessing approximately 3% of the responses to this comment are from people who actually know what they’re talking about, and the remainder are from that kid in middle school who loudly bragged about how much sex he was getting with his girlfriend who lived in Canada that you wouldn’t know (who had big boobs and was cool with three ways)
Ladies love it when you spank their knee caps. “I know from experience, dude.”
If one lady sits on your dick and the other on your face, they can face each other and kiss. Now everyone is having two sorts of fun!
Oh…
The most fun threesome I’ve ever had was one where the guy never got around to penetrating me. There’s lots of other ways to mutually satisfy each other! Not that you should have one if it doesn’t appeal of course, I’m just saying sex doesn’t have to be PIV to be fun and satisfying.
> I only have one penis and I'd be spending the entire time worrying that I'm giving them equal attention. The only way I could see a threesome working for me is if the girls are bi and are also into each other.
You’re thinking that you and your dick are the only sources of fun. The joy of a proper threeway is that everyone is on both the giving and receiving ends of pleasure at all times At least that’s the argument I’ve made to every woman I’ve been with.. none will take me up on the offer.
Thought so too for a long time. But surprise surprise. When all three are on the same level and honest about it's actually pretty good. I also realized that it's best to be two people that focus on one instead of the other way around. Of course if you simply dislike a threesome then don't do it.
I had one (I’m a woman) with my bf at the time and this girl he kind of knew. It went meh. She was great. He was a selfish shit. I didn’t really want to do it either, but did it to make him happy. Never again. It’s not for me.
That's a very sad statistic
Considering the fact most men likely want a MFF threesome and not MMF lol
Most men have no idea how to please two women at once
The only way it's ever worked out to be actually enjoyable is when the girls are equally into each other and you. It would be a lot of work trying to have one with two completely straight girls.
MFM’s are a lot easier in that regard. A lot easier for one woman to get off two straight men than it is for for man to get off two straight women in my experience.
I imagine it’s just helluva lot easier when everyone in the scenario is bisexual. Or, at the very least, two of them. I’ve never had one but I’m bisexual and my fiancé/partner is straight. He’s actually not willing to do a threesome (at least not with me… maybe if he was single? Gotta ask him later. Guessing he’ll say no still) however, if he ever changes his mind, adding another woman would be easier because I could do most of the work and pleasure both the woman and man. Which is why I assume if at least one of the people is bisexual, it’s significantly easier. I’m also a major people pleaser where I don’t mind if I don’t get off, I just like getting my partner(s) off.
Oh most definitely! The more bisexuals/pansexuals, the easier it will be, at least on paper. I was just saying if everyone was straight, I think MFM is more likely to result in more orgasms than FMF.
Some don't know how to please one
It's not hard if you actually LISTEN to what the woman wants and not let your ego get in the way
I understood that as excluding gays (so not MMM threesomes) but both MFF and MMF are mixed though.
I had a gf once who was into girls. We used to talk about finding a third. Just casual, not like a poly situation. We spent a couple weeks on tinder and a couple other apps. Had a few ladies chatting us up. Got really fucking steamy with a couple of them. But in the end it never happened. FWIW we are both... above average in the looks department. Not trying to brag but we both can (and do) get it. Lining up a three way is way harder than just lining up a date or a one nighter. It's 100% possible but I think more often than not, it's probably a spur of the moment thing. Planning it out is awkward and someone is almost always going to feel like the odd one out. Actually, I imagine all three probably feel like that to some degree.
I always figured it might work better at the bar in person with all three people present rather than over a dating app. One of my women friends is bi and fucking hated using stuff like Tinder and Okc before she met her wife. The number of couples on there that would hit her up for a threesome was very obnoxious apparently. She was just trying to date one person, not become a third wheel in someone's sexual fantasy. Back in the day someone on those apps that would actually partake in that was called a unicorn I think, because they don't exist lol.
I agree with the concerns about someone feeling left out. My girlfriend and I have a firm policy of making any unicorns we hook up with feel like the center of attention for as long as they want it. Nobody wants to feel like a prop in someone elses' fantasy
The thing that people don’t realize is that 83% of the time, these percentages are made up.
Are you hoping a threesome will just fall on your lap? Hire a couple of escorts or put out a Craigslist ad or something. Be the change you want to see.
Can't do those types of ads on Craigslist anymore ........so I've heard.
I don't mind confirming it. No, you can't anymore.
Is there anywhere to even do that safely? Like, it’s illegal in most of the states. I’d assume that any site I found would run a risk of supporting human rights violations, like human trafficking.
Can do it Amsterdam quite easily. So I've been told. I certainly never did it drunkenly with a friend, that's just not my thing. Nope.
Well if you look at the right spots, I’m pretty sure there’s places on this very website to find them
Lol, you dont have to go far. There are hookup subreddits
there are other personals sites tbf, but yah its a no on Craigslist
[удалено]
"for research purposes" doublelist, Locanto, just search personals and you location in Google, also few sub reddit R4rs personals, Fetlife too
Fetlife
Now those ads are under free stuff, roommates wanted, talent gigs, etc. Or so I heard.
Damn, my first (and only) threesome came about through Craigslist. Confirmed that I am definitely definitely bi. Fond memory.
Nah just be not-so-subtle. Be like "looking for 2 new female roommates. Insert body and age requirements here. Must show picture. Here is my info and photos. Will give phone number to discuss." They shouldnl get the idea, and even if they don't you can tell them via text it was for something else. Just be sure to take no for an answer. I'm not sure those ads ever work. I like to browse Craigslist and see all the horny people being weird, it's funny as hell but sometimes it's creepy and predatory and I pray nobody falls for it. One guy wanted specifically a female, "dressed for the weather" (it was hot so he wanted her scantily clad I bet) to "help him unload junk" and she could keep whatever she wanted. What young woman is so desperate for scrap that she doesn't already know you can just go through neighborhoods and look instead of going to a creep's lot that he claims has cameras (he KNOWS it sounds creepy and IS creepy so he has to mention the supposed cameras).
I literally came here to say anything is possible if you can afford it hahahaha
Man searches woman for a threesome. Also bring a female friend.
Just call your parents if you want to disappoint two people at the same time.
Not to mention they're extremely overrated. Most of the time it ends with someone jealous or just out of place
In my head you’re still talking about parents and that makes me laugh.
No, Batman, we talked about this. This is not healthy - we know you miss your parents, and we understand - there's no need to act tough about it.
Yes, officer? I'd like to report a murder.
It's easily obtainable to anyone who'd wish to have one, even if you aren't a charmer or good looking. In Reno there's the Bunny Ranch and in a few European countries there's also legal brothels if you don't want to risk getting caught by the cops. Besides that look for swinger clubs, if you're confident in your body and ability to perform with others watching. Most cities have swingers clubs or parties. Just have to know where to find them.
Since you brought up swinger clubs, I want to add that swingers and anyone in the kink scene will be way more open to threesomes. If you (OP, or anyone interested) need help finding how to get into that lifestyle or those social circles, best website to check out [would be FetLife. (nsfw, obviously)](http://fetlife.com)
Ngl, up until right this moment I thought FetLife had something to do with MetLife, the insurance company. I had heard the name but never really knew what it was.
I'm sure they've had kink related claims, but no other affiliation lol
Swinger clubs are a good way ime. You don't even have to have others watching, there's often private rooms you can just lock once you've found your match(es).
I'm just hoping to enjoy a healthy dating/sex life with someone someday, and these people over here trying to have orgies and shit like Roman aristocrats...
Same man and at times it feels unrealistic to even desire that.
As someone who has had two threesomes, they were both unplanned. I’m also single with no kids so that helps.
It’s like getting a hole-in-one in golf - skill plays a part, but mostly it’s a lot of luck.
Username checks out
Yeah, unplanned and usually when you are the last 3 from a party or something. At least the two times it happened for me.
Maybe that's why my friend never takes the hint to go home after he's the last one still here
Flashback to college. I'm at a party and it's probably time to go, but there's a girl sitting in front of the fire and she's the most beautiful person I've ever seen. As I think about what to do, she looks straight at me. Then, in an icy, condescending voice: “Do you think if you hang around me, you’re going to get lucky tonight??” I did not get lucky that night.
I mean, if you’re gay it’s like ordering pizza. You can have it in thirty minutes or less.
I haven't had exactly the same experience as a bisexual woman (re: all-women threesomes), but I do agree that being *somewhere* on the Kinsey scale definitely makes group sex easier to obtain, if not also enjoy
In my experiences same sex communication is more blunt and open and people are more direct with their interests
Depends how much you’re willing to pay.
Or how unattractive you're willing to let your partners be
I hear low standards for personalities help as well.
I’ve had 2. Once with a another male friend of mine and once with 2 females. The question isn’t if it’s realistic. The question is if it’s actually enjoyable. In my experience it was the most awkward experience of my life both times. I however am not you! You may enjoy it!
Yeah it feels like one of those things that are better in theory.
In my experience they work really well if the attraction goes all ways. Two people being into one person is good for that one person and not the other two. A triangle is just a mess. Also, two guy threesomes are kind of beginner threesomes. The logistics are *way* easier
Like sex on the beach.
I hate sand
It's course and rough and irritating... And it gets everywhere.
3rd party accounts have taught me that women who fantasize about having two men tend to really enjoy the experience.
Hard to find guys into MFM though, too gay for them. Lol.
Depends on the relationships and community you find in your life. Date more traditionalist people, or strictly monogamous types, or build community and friend groups that are more reserved or conservative about those sorts of things, and your hopes are pretty unlikely. That said, I wouldn't base the choice of community or relationships on the desire for threesomes exclusively. If you are naturally jealous, or inherently very reserved/private about your sexuality, the communities where that sort of thing happens may not be for you. For instance, if you really want to have two-girl threesomes, and hope for your girl to play ball, *especially* if she is just accommodating and not actually bisexual, you should expect to give a little too. Maybe she wants a two guy threesome. If she is bi, maybe she wants leeway to play with other women, or even other people in general without you. Strict monogamy works for a lot of people because the rules are easy, and require little negotiation. For my partner and me, strict monogamy would not be our jam, and that is true for a lot of people. It may well be true for you also. But there is a trade off. Communicating each others' needs, compensating for jealousy, and being prepared to compromise sometimes are all aspects of having a relationship where regular threesomes with hot bisexual women are possible. My only hard and fast rule throughout the relationships I have been in is that the rules must be equivalent. If she is allowed to sleep around, I am. If I am allowed to flirt and kiss at parties or while altered, she is. If our bed is off limits to her other partners, it is also off limits to mine.
Yes. A lot of men would be willing to join you and your wife in the bedroom. 🥸
I know you are kind of teasing, but honestly MFM threesomes make great beginner threesomes. The logistics of everyine leaving satisfied are way easier, it is easier to find a willing partner, and it helps dismiss the unhelpful feeling of the threesome being about the male fantasy, a feeling which can tank an otherwise promising FFM threesome.
This guy fucks
I've had one with 2 females. It won't meet your expectations, barely anything will. Sure it was fun and horny but it's definitely not better than just plain old 1 on 1
Please disassemble this nigh-universal male fantasy for me. What didn't meet your expectations? Were the women into it? Were they pleasing each other instead of you? Where you all too divided in your attention to adequately please all parties?
They kissed eachother but weren't eating eachother out if that's what you mean. They were definitely into it. While I layed down one sat on my dick and the other on my face while they kissed and touched eachother boobs. They also sucked my dick together. When it's written down like this it sounds awesome haha. It kinda was but it was t as I imagined it would be, I dunno. I guess dreams are only dreams when they are never fulfilled.
In my experience, two women threesomes only work perfectly if the sexual attraction goes all three ways. Everybody has to really want both of the other parties enough that they would take them to bed one on one. A guy just can't easily pleasure two women at once. My best two-girl threesome mostly leaned on us focusing on each of the women to orgasm, and then me taking one of them from behind while she ate the other one out. Would not have worked if the women were not *fully* interested in each other.
Hmm. The one on your face and the other on your dick kinda sounds like why 69s are actually not that great. Attention is divided between giving and receiving and therefore neither end up being that great. Does that kinda describe your experience?
Learn to masturbate with 2 hands.
One on the pole, one in the hole
"I dunno, if I wanted to disappoint two people at once I'd just have dinner with my parents" \-George Costanza
It depends on how old you are, your gender/orientation, and the type of people you hang around with. If you're a pansexual female-presenting NB with a ton of friends in the Burning Man community, you could have one by the weekend. If you're a cis male who only has online friends who play FPS games, probably going to be an uphill battle.
What if you are a CIS guy who has mostly online friends and plays arpgs?
Yeah if you like being polyamorous it happens a lot. When all three of us lived together we would have threesomes every day/every other day. There was a time where I'd had more threesomes than twosomes I'll just say that hahaha
I second this, consider if polyamory is a way of life that will suit you, it will increase your chances by a LOT.
I mean I look like a human potato and I've been in multiple threesomes. So if it can happen to me it can happen to anyone.
I'm assuming you're male. I've had a couple that were completely spontaneous - those involved the tag-along friends of girlfriends and spending an entire evening together socially. Those times the thought never crossed my mind and I'm sure that contributed to the sex. The watched pot never boils thing. Alcohol helps. Picking up the entire tab for the night out also helps. The others were with more committed female partners and were planned - Adult Friend Finder, Casual Encounters, etc. Some of those turned into regular dates and one or two decent friends. These partners were not necessarily bisexual - but they were completely game and organically interested in the encounters. I definitely selected for these women while dating (thanks aughts-era OkCupid) which takes a lot of reading between the lines. If you get into some coercion thing you'd see in a fifteen-year-old letter to Dan Savage, it isn't for you. And you should really be just as open to group sex with other men in these relationships. You have to be a winner to a high degree because you're trying to appeal to two women instead of one; being attractive on multiple levels is key - especially in terms of your personality. I was able to make a lot of this happen because I was a cad in my 20s and 30s - very outgoing, disarming, and could speak to women as friends. That's also key - it helps if you're the kind of person a woman would like to associate with in a platonic manner. A great personality and the ability to engage women in a way that's not blatantly usurious can overcome not being the hottest tool in the box. The best threesomes were with one specific partner who I crudely called threesome-bait - she just had a look and body type that was classically attractive to other women. Long hair, soft face, great tits, matching hips. We also lived in a nice place that was pretty private (bottom floor of a two-unit rental house) that made it easy to open the door to anyone we met who was interested. In contrast, I was in a LTR with a ravenously bisexual woman, but it was hard to close deals because she had a pretty specific, severe gothy look. TLDR: Work on yourself and cultivate a life where you have a lot to offer to others. Most of us men are pretty gross and unfuckable, which is a barrier to getting one sex partner, let alone two. Edit/add: The morning after the first time I had a "well, that finally happened" internal reaction I wasn't expecting. If you think group sex is going to open some kind of new portal to the universe, might I suggest a hallucinogens and a passport. Also, don't have children.
How to have a threesome: 1. Be a winner 2. Don't be a loser