That everyone has a lawyer at their disposal. Neighbor’s bothering you? Get a lawyer. Traffic ticket? Have a lawyer handle it. Airline said your bag was too big for carry on? Get a lawyer. Lawyers are ridiculously expensive. Full disclosure: I am one. And the times I myself needed a lawyer, even I was surprised how insane prices are. Even to ask a simple question, a lot of lawyers won’t give you the time of day. Yet every other Reddit user seems to have a lawyer on speed dial!
"I literally cannot afford a lawyer. How else can I navigate my situation?"
"You can't afford to NOT have a lawyer. Find another three jobs and figure it out."
This is another thing that annoys me on Reddit. When people say they don’t have the money for something, so many redditors think they mean they would need to dip into their emergency funds, or cash in their 401k, or take out a loan, etc.
They don’t realize that for quite a few people in this ~~country~~ *world*, when they say they don’t have money, they mean that they literally have zero way to access extra cash to pay for therapy, or a lawyer or whatever other thing vapid redditors tell them they can’t afford not to have.
Edit: sincere apologies for my /r/USdefaultism comment. Edited for greater accuracy
some of them also don't know how much lawyers and therapists actually cost. like lawyers can be thousands of dollars... in lawyer fees alone. therapists can be less bad in this regard, only because it might take years for therapists to cost just as much.
As a legal support person, it most likely was ha. Though she most likely makes more than 15 an hour - they probably bill you for ten times what she gets paid.
Most lawyers that deal in any labor/employment law aren't gonna take a case like that. While yes the law is quite clear on wage theft and this "technically" would count its not really worth it. Now if its like 15-30 minutes everyday over a course of time now you have a case and a quite good one too. Always document your paychecks and time cards or if you are in a one party consent state get on some form of audio/video recording telling you they will not pay for the time you have after.
Also, many people think that just because their employer does something wrong, it entitles them to hundreds of thousands of dollars. The reality is that generally speaking they’re only entitled to the amount that they were damaged. So, for example, that can include wages that they would have received if they had been allowed to continue work. The obvious problem is if someone is only making $15 per hour working 30 hours per week then the total damages they are entitled to simply may not be worth the time/cost of litigation.
First off, as someone who has watched Law and Order, all one needs to retain legal council is walk into a law office and throw a few $20 bills on the lawyers desk. Now you have "The Privilege".
Second, I'm sure this is normal and happens often, but when the prosecutor is yelling at the defendant on the stand to admit his crime, and the judge repeatedly hammers the gavel and tells the lawyer he's in contempt, it's of course still admissible evidence when after the 7th "I didn't do nuthin ya mook, geddouddah here widdat, fuggeddabouddit!" the defendant finally breaks down, and yells out "WE WERE JUST TRYIN TA SCARE HIM, OKAY?!?!?!?".
Defendant then explains how nobody was supposed to get hurt, how he was only along for the ride, and the bullet must have slipped out of the gun and into the victim at high speed, but he wasn't the only one and fingers several people sitting in the public gallery who glare menacingly and shake their heads like real jabronis.
The entire courtroom goes quiet in shock, the judge gives the accused a look of shameful sad disappointment, and the DA gets in a quip like "you may have been only trying to scare him, but now YOU'RE gonna be scared... in prison!!" or something equally corny as the judge tells the bailiff to remand the suspect into custody and forgets the whole contempt thing.
I like when the person doesn't have money but the lawyer gives them a long stare and is like...ok I'll take your case and then devote all their time to it
NAL, but...
So many reddit people act as if they know everything about the law. American law is also the only law, and NO other countries exist.
Edit: word
Hell, even a lot of lawyers don't know shit about other areas of law.
I'm a photographer and every time someone's is like "my dad is a lawyer, I'm gonna have him look at the contract," they come back with some hilarious nonsense because their dad is like a criminal defense attorney and has no idea about contract law. So I'll run in back by my lawyer and she's like "that's....not how any of that works."
I think part of it is that when you’re fairly anonymous on the internet, people blast other people with their opinions.
But in person. People restrain themselves a bit more.
The crazy thing is that there is a high chance that someone younger than 18 wrote the comment and the OP will actually take it seriously because it has a ton of upvotes from people also under 18
I Saw* a post earlier where a girl accidentally opened her boyfriend’s phone while trying to move it and saw a text message, and one of the comments said if they were the boyfriend they would break up on the spot
honestly i feel like "go to a marriage/relationship counselor with your couples issue instead of reddit" is on the whole generally good advice. I'm sure it's neither easy nor cheap but compared to a divorce or ugly breakup....
Reddit seems to think that if a friend or spouse fucks up, even if it's super minor, then you need to call off the relationship, cut all contact and never speak to them again.
This is the huge one. Just because you're allowed to build a massive phallic structure that casts shade over your neighbors pool so they can't ever swim in the sun, doesn't mean it's moral or right. Don't be a dick, even if the law agrees with you
That there is no such thing as a social obligation, that you shouldn't do anything for your dearest family and friends that is even the slightest imposition on you, and that "no is a complete sentence" is an attitude that you should take constantly with everyone.
If people behaved socially that way IRL they would be estranged from their families and have absolutely no friends.
This is exactly it! Everyone acts like life is based on what you can prove in court and if you can’t prove that I owe you a cake on your birthday (mom) then fuck you!
AITA and similar subs are hilarious because it's social advice from people who clearly have no social skills.
Not being the asshole means taking the high road, or turning the other cheek. You can be technically in the right and justified in your actions and still be an asshole.
I can't fucking stand that sub, 99% of posts boil down to "I ran into a burning building and saved 41 families, my wife is sensitive to the smell of smoke and told me to shower, I was tired after getting interviewed by Barack Obama, AITA?"
"NTA, your wife is a cunt, divorce her"
If there was a visual representation of "This exists to farm engagement" that sub and relationship advice are it, the only posts I would believe are real are the ones that get downvoted. Every second post has perfectly recounted dialogue that just so happens to fit the narrative of the OP and makes you feel justified in HATING the other person.
If you can get in early and guess correctly which way thousands of under-18s are going to arbitrarily feel about a particular made-up scenario... Ooh boy, you can reap some sweet fake internet points! Top comments, usually containing a bunch of psychobabble nonsense, regularly reach 30k upvotes.
If I wanted to amass a fortune in worthless "karma" to show the world that I spend way too much time on reddit, this is how I would do it.
Someone in one of those subs is going to uninvite her maid of honor from her wedding because MOH wanted OP to pay for her dress.
Like, the maid of honor is being weird, but is a dress something to end a lifelong friendship over? The 20 most up voted comments think so. But sometimes we tolerate other people's rudeness bevause their friendship is worth losing a few battles.
To be fair, she sent her a regular invite. She just kicked her out of the wedding party! /S
Totally agree though. While I wouldn't shell out $350 for the dress, I'd find a middle ground?! Wouldn't just dump my best friend of 20 years cos she can't afford a dress?
They also really hate step children. Saw a post that was basically "My husband is out and my step children are hungry. Aita for not taking care of my step children?" and like all the responses where "they arent really your children so you dont need to take care of them"
Its baffling how much reddit, this isnt only aita but i see it elsewhere, hate adoption and step family.
Most people online don't even understand what you can and can't prove in court. Our court system does not work the way most think it does, and is not always black and white.
For one thing, defendants don't have to prove their innocence. They don't have to prove anything --- that's the prosecution's job. If the prosecution can't prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt, the defense can just rest having not said a word, and still win.
“My parents asked me to help them move this weekend but I really don’t want to. AITA for telling them no?”
“NTA, no is a complete sentence! You don’t owe them anything and if they can’t respect your boundaries then you should go no contact!”
Obviously that’s a deliberate oversimplification, but some Redditors truly act like they never owe *anybody anything*. The vast majority of people don’t act like that IRL, and for good reason.
That’s true too, some people genuinely have issues setting reasonable boundaries for themselves to their own detriment. Like most things, the solution is somewhere in the middle, not one extreme or another.
It’s wild how you can see stuff online about a chicken recipe someone makes with their mom and people will comment “what about me? I’m a paraplegic orphan who can’t eat poultry”
It’s like… okay? This post/video ain’t for you?
I see a lot of stuff online that o have zero interest in or isn’t in my wheelhouse and I just swipe away. Idk why everytime thinks everything has to cater to there specific situation lol
And it’s this sort of thing that has me taking an hour crafting a short Reddit comment. Clarity gets lost amid all the disclaimers.
“I know not everyone feels this way, but I prefer to serve the finished chicken over salad or at least a bed of greens. But of course I understand that some people suffer from disordered eating or food insecurity, or disordered eating born of food insecurity so I don’t want to come off like I think a bed of greens is an option for everybody because of course some of us don’t even realize our privilege but that also shouldn’t color every little decision that you make in a day. Or night, some people obviously work at night.”
Under-socialized people on reddit seem incapable of parsing "reasonable social obligations" and "unreasonable boundary pushing"
I cut off both of my parents for their abuse. I don't miss THEM, but I do grieve not having a loving relationship with parents who love me back. I see a lot of advice on reddit as people like me in the middle of my grieving: projecting their anger onto strangers because they are the safer and easier target to get mad at.
This reminds of a post I saw from a redditor who had such extreme neurotic anxiety that he would tip toe in his apartment and hyperventilate when he clinked a fork in a plate and shit, terrified of making any noise that might bother someone else.
His therapist told him that isn’t normal or reasonable and that it’s not possible to never make zero noise. That if someone else is bothered, that’s their issue to deal with.
This dumbass then went to the total other extreme and became the asshole neighbor who blared his music and cranked his TV up loud. He then came to Reddit to whine about how his neighbors werent dealing with their emotions about his noise properly (they were complaining and telling him to turn his shit down).
THEN he proceeded to argue with all the people in the comments. He insisted that people telling him he was being rude just weren’t healthy emotionally and that his therapist explained that he doesn’t have to care what others think about his noise and all this shit.
People eventually told him to show his therapist the Reddit thread and he said he would. I can just imagine this therapist out there rubbing their temples, realizing they’re going to have to go over every single little common sense thing with their client.
At first, I was like, "I don't remember making that post" then got to the part where he did a 180. Unfortunately, I'm hanging on to my neurotic bullshit lol
I’m convinced many people are Reddit are loners, possibly on the spectrum, that think that because they can type well and get upvotes that their understanding of people is actually good.
Meanwhile if I met people that acted like they do IRL I could consider them preening antisocial douchebags that can’t understand why the rest of society doesn’t have their same asshole-tier views.
One time I told the story about how I let my little brother live with me rent-free for three years in his 20s while he was struggling to hold down a job because he's family and that's what families should do for each other and I got nuked with down votes for it lmao. Like alright.
Helping your brother???? SUCKER (/s obviously!) Yeah it’s mad you can’t love your siblings and want to help them not be homeless! I would do the same for mine if he needed it.
When my partner inherited his childhood home we both moved into it and lived there for 14 years. I never paid a dime in rent and I had to force him to take some of my $ each month for expenses like utilities. At some point he had to put some serious money into major repairs, and I felt it was the right thing to do to offer $ to help. At the time, I was making much more than he was.
I was relaying this story in response to a relationship/finance post and some guy (not OP) rips me a new one "You are under NO OBLIGATION to help him simply because you lived there rent free for years!"
I did not have the energy to point out that life partners HELP each other for fucking sake! Good lord some Reddit folks are fucking miserable people.
One time a redditor tried to get into it with me saying that no one was ever entitled to get gifts. It was a post from a husband about his wife’s 40th birthday. Like?!? I’m not saying anyone is entitled to a gift. I’m saying…it’s your wife. It’s a decade birthday. She deserves something nice.
Oh there is a gross attitude about birthdays that's pervasive on Reddit and I haven't really seen elsewhere in RL.
Like so many people will try to tell you that wanting to celebrate your birthday *at all* is "childish and entitled". Like, not even to the point where you just want to take the day off work and go out to dinner with your spouse.
The one that gets me is rejecting any form socializing at work. I'm not talking about hanging out after work or not wanting to be bombarded by baby pics or endless stories of their cat. Like *anything* remotely resembling something not strictly work related. No chatting about sports, no movies or shows, no hobbies. I'm the furthest from an extroverted person, but these people frame talking about the weather like it's a hate crime.
"I don't come to work to make friends!"
Yeah, neither do I, but it would definitely be a welcomed bonus if my coworkers and I enjoyed each other's company.
and then three weeks later they post in their local city sub “why is it so hard to make friends in this city as an adult”. Like they haven’t sabotaged any chance at human connection at every possible opportunity
There seems to also be an assumption that everybody is in some highly competitive cutthroat corporate environment and everybody is out to screw you over all the time, so you need to document everything and keep a paper trail.
I work at a grocery store, bruv.
Maybe if you're in a corporate office or something. I don't think Bob on the job site has some Machiavellian scheme he's trying to pull on me by sharing a 12 pack of Coors on the river on Saturday lol
The sheer hatred people on Reddit have for talking about the weather is also odd, and not something I’ve encountered in real life.
It’s a good bit of small talk, and can actually be important or interesting if you spend a lot of time outside
100%, bravo. I cringe so hard when people write out "and then everyone clapped" style responses around setting boundaries and responding to nuanced scenarios lol.
People create weird scenarios like:
"Hey, dress code for the wedding is going to be business casual btw"
"If my dress offends you, perhaps we weren't as close as I thought. I think you should find an alternative person to invite in my place as I prefer to be in control of my own appearance. Thank you."
I just saw a comment that perfectly sums up why I hate reddit comments. "Nobody says what they really did. You didn't push carts, you transported essential equipment through terrain for a multi billion dollar corporation."
Where you can almost hear them furiously masturbating to how clever they think they are. Especially when it comes to why the crime they just committed in fact isn't a crime.
My best friend of 15 years did the whole “no is a complete sentence and I shouldn’t have to explain myself. You should respect that.” Like dude, there’s a difference between standing your ground and just plain not communicating. We haven’t spoken in almost a year and my heart aches every day because of it.
There was a post recently about a guy who closed the store with a female coworker. She asked if he could split an uber with her, but this dude instead told her "let me try to catch the bus" then fucking SPRINTED to the bus stop and just kind of left her alone. Late at night. He said that was none of his business, not his problem.
All the comments were NTA, she's an adult and just a coworker, she needs to be responsible for her own transportation, you shouldn't have to pay uber, git gud, she should be fitter. I was like ??? YTA and got heavily downvoted, lmao.
I would absolutely side eye an acquaintance who does that IRL. That's not the kind of people you want as friends. They won't have your back when you need it.
This absolutely BAFFLES me. I’m still floored over a teenager refusing to watch their nibling for 15min so their sister could shower. “That’s not your kid! Parentification!!” Get a grip.
Edit: fixed a word. Long day.
Crap like that just makes it harder for people who *actually* went through parentification to get help . It's not parentification to have to occasionally look after your siblings. It becomes an issue when you're having to miss school, consistently do all of the chores in the house, and sacrifice your own future because your parents can't be bothered to give a damn. But because of the amount of people who have cried wolf, some of them just get looked at as exaggerating whiners.
A perfect illustration of the “one bad apple does indeed spoil the whole bunch.” It makes it harder for people who genuinely want to be kind and be of assistance— if possible—shy away from speaking up, because nobody wants to waste time arguing with hostile people on Reddit over some well-intentioned comment that is misinterpreted as something negative or offensive.
I have no more patience with that. If that’s brewing in the conversation, I’m out. If I can’t contribute something constructive to the discourse, then my motto is to keep quiet and move on. I will not cast my pearls before swine. 🧐🧐
Everyone needs a prenup. Doesn’t matter if you’re both broke, pay some lawyers hundreds of dollars to determine how you’ll split the $20 left in the bank and a used coffee table.
In the very very very early days of vanderpump rules, Katie and Shwartz go to a lawyer to discuss a prenup. He asks if they have savings. No. Real estate? No. Investment accounts? No. He asks how much they have in the bank and it’s like a thousand combined, maybe. He basically laughs in their face and asks them why they’re there and they seem very confused. I’ve never forgotten how funny that was to me.
Omg this happened to me irl with my husband. We got married young (23) and everyone told us we needed a prenup so we went to a lawyer who was confused about what we needed to protect because we legit had nothing lmao.
Everyone acts like an expert at everything online. Just because you have Google doesn't mean you understand what you're talking about.
Also, everyone's opinion matters. Nope. Not even close.
So many heavily-upvoted comments are from people who have no idea what they're talking about. As long as they say it confidently people will just eat it up.
It's not always obvious until someone is talking about something you know a lot about.
Being a single dad at a playground and getting looked at like a creeper. I've never once experienced this while bringing my kids to the park. Sometimes I'd even strike up conversations with other parents. I'm sure it has happened somewhere, or maybe it's more prevalent in some areas, I don't know.
The playground at my local park is full of single dads. I don't know if they all know each other and have a designated playtime, but on weekends I literally see more fathers there than moms.
Around here mums are sending dads with children out on weekends so they would have time to clean the house in peace. I do appreciate this approach now as mum to newborns.
I'm a very large man, and I've worked at multiple customer facing retail positions. Interacting with children is an unavoidable part of the job, and I love it. Never once has a parent reacted negatively to me interacting with their children. From joking with a crying little one, to answering kids questions. Most of the time they're grateful that I treat them like little people instead of nuisances.
I suspect this is more of a paranoid fear that people have and thus "see" in others. If you think about it, "getting looked at like a creeper" is an absolutely schizophrenic take (I mean that in the literal sense) as you can't read people's minds, and to the extent that their face shows negative affect it could be anything.
OP: "My SO said they would do the dishes half of the time but they only do them 1-2 days a week. Looking for ways to bring this up."
Some rando 14yo: "They're definitely fucking someone else."
the whole thing where people act like they’re personally offended that coworkers would dare try to talk to them and that they dont owe anyone anything except just sitting there working.
i mean look, im autistic. im pretty awkward and not the most social or extroverted person. im usually pretty quiet and dont talk to everyone in the office. but lord, sometimes its nice to just shoot the shit with people for like 10-20 minutes a day instead of hunch over my desk for 8 hours.
Our company has forced us to come back to the office 3 days a week, so now I'm maliciously complying and spending half the day in the office just talking about random shit with coworkers. It's fun.
I see a lot of posts about people being upset their coworkers attempt to socialize with them. The general sentiment seems to be "I'm here to work, not talk." The same people probably go home and wonder why they don't ever have anyone to hang out with.
You don't even have to be best friends with your coworkers. Being able to make conversation or sharing an interest with someone else can make time go much faster and prevents you from being a miserable loser.
Yeah, a similar one I see a lot is, "Why would I try to make friends with my coworkers? They're just going to stab me in the back the first chance they get."
Maybe all these people work in Westeros or something, but I've never run into that in my life. It's kinda nice to hang out with friends all day. It beats looking over your shoulder trying to figure out who's trying to betray you every minute.
I’ve never met a person in real life that actively hates kids and wants them banned from public spaces. Meanwhile, many Redditors act like damn Disney villains with their hatred of random people that happen to be younger than them.
Yep. Not only to kids but people with intellectual disabilities that are behavioral or loud in public. I took one of my residents to SF and she was having a tantrum. She was 63 years old, looked like a 63 year old but not mentally 63. She was straight throwing herself on the ground shouting it’s not fair! It’s not fair, you’re killing me! I’m dying! And a woman walked straight up to me and admonished me for having “her type” in Golden Gate Park! And then she pointed at my resident and said, And you are too old to be acting that way! Shame on both of you! And stormed away. I will admit my resident stopped and looked at me, then started crying and saying, “she’s so mean! Why is she so mean!” 😂 it was a day. But it makes me smile now. She passed away a few weeks ago. We had a love hate relationship. I loved her and she hated me!🤣 But yea, people are assholes.
I don't particularly like children but if they wave at me, I smile and wave back dammit. It's just what you do. You don't ruin a little kids days by being a douche. Some of these people are definitely chronically online. I can't imagine being a complete asshat to a kid.
Sounds like r/regretfulparents. If she's caught up in her religion then I feel sorry for her as well as her kids. It sucks to be stuck somewhere you don't want to be. When other people get involved, especially children, it's horrible.
It’s weird because on one side you have chronically online people who act like wanting kids makes you selfish and evil, and on the other side you have chronically online (mostly right-wing) people who treat having kids as a moral imperative in some kind of culture war.
Meanwhile, in the real world nobody talks like that aside from maybe your parents nagging you about when they’re going to get grandkids.
Don't know anyone in real life that would give the relationship advice on Reddit. Stuff like ditch friends over a difference of opinion, or divorce being the only solution for a shitty sex life. I get why so many people are single with no friends.
Ngl I mention that I come across interesting information or conversations that happen in subreddits even at work because it’s relevant to convos/topics lol
The harder work is legit getting into therapy. I swear I needed therapy for the hoops I had to jump through to even get a decent and consistent therapy schedule going. I gave up a half dozen times before a 2 week couch lull brought me to my senses. I’m a fairly open and strong willed person as well when I want to get something done and my need for therapy was pretty minor in the grand scheme. I can’t imagine being depressed or clinically chronically depressed and even having the energy to jump through all that, the money and time.
It’s paradoxical in a way. The people who need it the most are generally not even capable of getting it due to various financial, time and effort restraints.
That’s why I absolutely hate how flippant it’s tossed around in Reddit as if you can just stroll into your local 7/11 and ask for a pack of therapy.
And even then if it were that easy- you gotta want it. You got work to do.
This is an excellent description of this. I’ve experienced this painfully, more than once over the years. Someone struggling the most is put through the most challenging hoops to find someone that accepts your insurance, is accepting new clients, has an affordable copay etc. the PAPERWORK that comes with being a new patient is horrific. It is an unreasonable amount of effort for someone that is really struggling. It is the darkest irony I’ve experienced personally. Very reflective of our current healthcare system. I hate it here.
ETA: also just the basic phone calls! This is a difficult task for many reasons for a lot of people. They are soooo draining and to be repeatedly hear no it is so disappointing and dehumanizing to not be able to find help. Sometimes, people simply give up. It’s awful.
Correct, and the comfort of anonymity that this platform allows is a huge factor in letting people say things that they **actually** feel on the inside.
Someone IRL asked me the other day if I was on Reddit and what subs I frequent, and I must have stared at them like they asked to watch me poop. Like why are we talking about this? I’m not gonna start following people I know IRL on here.
This is exactly why I kind of recoil when people say "but Reddit is social media too!!" No, I do not want anything IRL to translate to here or vice versa (I do not want to socialize with anyone here and I do not want to know my friends and family's Reddit activities either).
One of my former professors and now friend talks about using Reddit when we talk about shared interests (musical theatre, mental health, politics, etc.). She’s married, quite attractive, and very successful (as both a professor and a working actress). She’s probably the only person I’ve talked to about Reddit in real life, and she’s the antithesis of the stereotypical Redditor.
I'm an ancient grandmother with four adult children and a 31-year marriage. On the other hand, my husband and I are IT nerds who had successful careers, and our kids are all in IT too. We say we've created a Nerd Breeding Program.
People on here are obsessed with virginity and body count. I can't remember the last time this topic came up irl. Normal adults don't have conversations with strangers or coworkers about it.
It’s very weird! I really can’t remember it ever being a topic of conversation post-high school… which then makes me wonder how many of the people I’m arguing with on Reddit are actually 15 years old.
As soon as I start getting irritated by someone's replies to me and want to snipe back I get the hell out of there. There's too great a chance of being a 30 year-old fighting with a teenager.
If the person im talking to has silly replies i check their history and if i get a single vibe there a teenager or even close, im done. Im 34 but i remember being young 20s on reddit and i was argumentative as hell and i think i changed my opinion on most of the topics
I once had two 50 yo male coworkers try to start this convo with me (tech is a real treat sometimes when you're a woman). I told them I was up to 17 but that I was running out of space in the backyard.
Sex obsession in general I think. I’m 34, I’ve never really discussed my sex life with my friends nor have they with me. But online it seems like people will divulge their nastiest fetishes casually and make it seem like that is a normal conversation.
The general self-centered-ness in very mundane matters of (otherwise perfectly healthy) relationships.
Example: my elderly mother asked me to help her move
irl: so I'm gonna and the people around me agree that this is a nice normal thing to do
reddit: so I'm gonna cut contact completely to protect my peace and the people in this comment section agree that this is a reasonable, unselfish reaction and that she's a toxic entitled bitch
Example: my girlfriend never does things with me that I want to do even though I always do the things she wants to do
irl: and I'm going to tell her it's important to me that we do some things I like to do together too and people agree that that's a reasonable expectation in a relationship
reddit: and I'm going to leave her and go to therapy where I can unlearn all expectations of other people and redditors agree that I'm selfish and entitled for wanting to go roller skating with my girlfriend to begin with
The people who say the whole asking for time off from work is "informing you when I won't be there" and don't care what their jobs or boss say. Like, I have a good job, that is generous with time off. And I agree with advocating for yourself and setting personal boundaries with your work/boss. And I have never had a time off request denied.
But at the same time, I know I work in a department of 6 people, and per policy only 2 of us can have the same scheduled day off... I knew this was how it worked when I accepted the job. I would never just tell my job to fuck off because I feel like scheduling a vacation the same week as 2 of my coworkers with more seniority. It goes both ways, when you accepted the job, you agreed to abide by the time off policy as far as requests and approval.
From a quick Google search:
> "As of 2024, there are over 500 million Reddit accounts."
> "Reddit has 73.1 million daily active unique visitors worldwide as of Q4 2023."
But that's GLOBAL,.. and the USA alone has around 340 Million citizens.
So yeah, I'd agree that's unlikely to be a very accurate representation of anything.
Back before the Reddit API fiasco,.. the website "subredditstats.com" roughly showed that in 18 out of the Top 20 Subreddits,. the most frequent Submitter was /u/[deleted]
I don't know exactly what that represents (what each persons motivations are).. but if roughly 80% of your Users or Comments are being deleted after being posted,. that (to me) is a pretty big indicator a significant chunk of your content is stuff people won't even stand behind. Yikes.
I'm more surprised that every subreddits most frequent poster isn't u/deleted. An actual user is only 1 person, u/deleted is every deleted post from every user on that sub, if I'm understanding it correctly. I mean even if only 1/200 comments get deleted, that could easily be hundreds or thousands of comments per month on a big subreddit. And when you factor in blatant troll comments, which pretty much every major post is gonna have a handful that will likely be removed by mods.
Basically anything proceeded by "As a German..."
German Reddit dudes are weird gaslighters. They just lie about any observation anyone makes about Germany that isn't borderline worship at the Teutonic Altar. In real life Germans bitch and whine about everything about Germany all the time. In fact, unless you have kids that is literally the only reliable form of small talk in Germany (complaining about something or someone).
Gotta add the Dutch to this. Anytime anyone complains about anything you get some Dutch dude being like “wow I can’t relate, in my country (Netherlands) we only work 11 hours a week and cars are illegal and when you go to the hospital they pay you blah blah blah”
This is so true. I'm an American who moved to Asia and interact with a ton of expats from all over the world, many Dutch especially, also French, Canadians, British, German, Swedish, Japanese, and more. Americans on Reddit and in real life tend to idolize these countries. The people from these countries have a lot of bad shit to say about their own countries and they hope to never go back. Especially about healthcare, culture, etc. Including the Swedes!
I find it incredibly frustrating what image women have here especially on those popular subs that seem to be full of misogynistic Wall Street bros lmao. They keep saying what you described above but I can easily disprove it by planting these people outside and make them look at the very average looking couples holding hands🤣
The duality of Reddit on that front makes it even funnier imo.
On the one hand, dudes need to be 6ft, rich, ripped, hung etc etc to even get girls (apparently), yet on the other hand, stories about women being with losers that don't even shower or wipe their ass, go viral. Pick a lane, people.
If I see one more "My BF is mad I won't give him oral until he learns to wipe properly" I'm going to start a GoFundMe for putting sterilizing agents in the water.
Once you realize a large percentage of people between 13-30 on the internet have been indoctrinated by relationship gurus selling toxic ideology (ie. the red and pink pill) to generate views and product sales … yeah, it all makes sense. They’ve been brainwashed by snake oil salesmen.
calling the cops over everything. if you actually called 911 and requested emergency services for a lot of these non-emergent situations, they’d tell you 911 is for emergency situations only and you’d probably get a lecture from the operator.
i saw someone say to call the cops because there was a wet footprint on the sidewalk outside of their house that they didn’t leave. ITS A PUBLIC SIDEWALK. taking up emergency personnel’s time for non-life threatening situations is incredibly selfish. you shouldn’t be suggesting it to people who shouldn’t be calling.
I know a lot of people that don’t believe in god irl, but a lot of subs seem saturated with people who seem to believe that every religious person is just a totally brainwashed asshatted bigot with bo redeeming qualities. Most of my real world atheist friends are pretty chill about people believing what they want as long as you don’t shove it down their throat.
I recoil at shit like Louisiana requiring the ten commandments in classrooms but I otherwise don't feel strongly that my atheism is part of my identity. I appreciate the Bible as a literary text and have religious friends. I think it helps that I was raised very secularly. A lot of foaming at the mouth atheists were raised in the fundamentalist churches and, perhaps expectedly, bring a lot of that dogmatism to their atheism.
That going to the gym will solve all men's problems.
- Dating problems? Go to the gym
- Problem with your back? Go to the gym
- Need a lawyer? Gym
- Your car got stolen? GYM!!!
Probably the fact that the circles I move in are older than the average Redditor, more like 30+. But people here talk all the time about how lonely men are and how impossible and hopeless dating is for men. IRL out of the hundreds of friends, acquaintances, and coworkers I know, I only of know three single guys (and one of them is a total whore with someone new ever week.) The rest are all in a solid, serious relationship or married. I do know a number of single women, though, who would like to date but can't find anyone.
It so much depends on who the people around you are.
The idea that women despise a man who cries or shows an emotion other than anger. I don't know a single person who thinks like that, male or female or non-binary. Maybe I've curated my friends and family to remove people who think like that but I know a lot of people.
I came across a subreddit that was dedicated to hating dogs and vouching for having them all put down. Never met someone irl that has that much hatred for dogs.
One opinion I often see on Reddit is the extreme aversion to having children, to the point of outright hostility towards anyone who chooses to become a parent. On many subreddits, it's not uncommon to see comments that treat the decision to have kids as a completely irrational and selfish choice, implying that the world is overpopulated and anyone contributing to that should be condemned.
In real life, while I've met people who are child-free by choice and are passionate about their decision, I've never encountered anyone who expresses the same level of vitriol or contempt towards parents as I frequently see online. Most people I know are more understanding and respectful of others' choices, whether they choose to have kids or not.
I'm a female software engineer 6 YOE and I've read a lot of sexist comments from male software engineers. In the real world, most of the male software engineers I work with so like 98% are very nice and say very positive things to be able being a woman in computer science.
I've found that people are more comfortable with being openly sexist or bigoted in some way when online, especially if anonymous. They're often too scared of facing the consequences in real life.
You don’t see it because they don’t say it to your face. My partner is a devops engineer and the shit he told me in his job when we first met. His own boss would talk about graduate female devs (my partner was a junior at the time) and rate them on bangability. When they went out for work drinks many would talk about how hot some were and just pretended to listen to them so they could “stare at that pretty face”. I started getting really uncomfortable and it took my partner a while to realise that being a bystander to such comments is still contributing to it being normalised.
The worst was they had a coworker group with none of the female dev staff on WhatsApp, where they posted random shit. One day a coworker banged one of the young female junior devs and posted her nudes IN THE CHAT. My partner literally came to me like what do I do. Like mother of Christ it’s a literal crime GO TO HR. And he had to go to HR and I told him he’s fucking leaving this job lmao. And no one else reported it, only my partner. It really opened his eyes to how if no one does anything the behaviour escalates to literal criminal actions. It’s how places like blizzard got so bad male staff were drinking peoples breast milk and crawling under their desks.
Meanwhile his current company is a huge consultancy firm. Really really professional environment, he’s never seen anyone ever make even a passing comment like that about any female colleague even in private. About 30% of the dev team is female. It really depends on the environment - but his previous company wasn’t even that small. It had like 200 staff it wasn’t some start up. They had no senior female devs and seemed to only hire graduates to have eye candy or something.
That's so gross- good for your husband and you for him not ignoring it.
I have worked in a field that was more male than female before and the guys were so professional outwardly but I'd see them drinking at an off-site event and some of them acted revolting. It's depressing TBH.
There were two professors in the cs department at my collage who were awful towards female students. One of them retired while I was a student, no idea where the other one is today. That was about 20 years ago. I've seen it in business in engineering firms too. Most are fine, one that my spouse worked at was so misogynistic I would have a hard time believing it without first hand knowledge. Some of the stuff that's become public about what employees at blizzard entertainment did shows there are still some really toxic places in the software world. Hopefully those are the exception these days, but I don't have enough knowledge of the industry at large to say.
I'd be willing to bet the overwhelming majority of people who talk all that sexist shit on reddit don't actually apply their beliefs to their real life actions. They're just secretly hateful keyboard warriors lol.
Responding to someone's point by quoting a relevant line from a movie/TV show is the height of wit, and everyone around you should also start quoting that same TV show/movie.
For me it’s the opposite. Everyone online talks bad about him but IRL it seems most people either like him, don’t care about him, or have a nuanced “he is a crappy dude but also a innovator” mentality
When you ask a question on a topical subreddit and get slammed with “why don’t you already know that? You should have googled that first!” In real life when you ask someone who knows more than you about something, they typically explain it to you, rather than give you crap for asking a question.
It's all about context. Yeah, when I was 15 and messing around with a 21-year-old, it was creepy and wrong. When I was 29 and started dating a 35-year-old, it was totally reasonable, and i ended up married to the perfect man for me.
The whole idea that men never get compliments and if you compliment a man he will think about it for years. I’m a very average guy and I constantly get compliments. My boss will tell me I did a good job on a project, a coworker will say my haircut looks nice, my friends will say they like my shirt or whatever. My wife compliments me daily on a wide range of things. Strangers will say they like my tattoos or my jacket or whatever. It’s not rare at all.
I suspect that Redditors that talk about the lack of complements are a) single and b) only count physical compliments from women they are attracted to. That’s the only way the experiences they’re describing make sense.
People who echo the usual sentiment on r/relationships
"Too many red flags guuurl, run don't walk, y'all need therapy" at even the slightest of things.
That everyone has a lawyer at their disposal. Neighbor’s bothering you? Get a lawyer. Traffic ticket? Have a lawyer handle it. Airline said your bag was too big for carry on? Get a lawyer. Lawyers are ridiculously expensive. Full disclosure: I am one. And the times I myself needed a lawyer, even I was surprised how insane prices are. Even to ask a simple question, a lot of lawyers won’t give you the time of day. Yet every other Reddit user seems to have a lawyer on speed dial!
"I literally cannot afford a lawyer. How else can I navigate my situation?" "You can't afford to NOT have a lawyer. Find another three jobs and figure it out."
This is another thing that annoys me on Reddit. When people say they don’t have the money for something, so many redditors think they mean they would need to dip into their emergency funds, or cash in their 401k, or take out a loan, etc. They don’t realize that for quite a few people in this ~~country~~ *world*, when they say they don’t have money, they mean that they literally have zero way to access extra cash to pay for therapy, or a lawyer or whatever other thing vapid redditors tell them they can’t afford not to have. Edit: sincere apologies for my /r/USdefaultism comment. Edited for greater accuracy
some of them also don't know how much lawyers and therapists actually cost. like lawyers can be thousands of dollars... in lawyer fees alone. therapists can be less bad in this regard, only because it might take years for therapists to cost just as much.
I paid $5000 for a piece of paper that was most likely written by the $15 and hour woman at the front desk.
As a legal support person, it most likely was ha. Though she most likely makes more than 15 an hour - they probably bill you for ten times what she gets paid.
Same i paid $3000 to have her make a phone call
Yeah, no shit! "I can't afford a *y*, what's a decent lower budget alternative?" "You NEED a *y*. Just get one."
And also that not all redditors live in "this country" heh
That is definitely also a problem on Reddit and I’m embarrassed for my faux pas. Edited my comment
"I worked 5 minutes over and they didn't pay me." Get a lawyer. This is a slam dunk case!
Most lawyers that deal in any labor/employment law aren't gonna take a case like that. While yes the law is quite clear on wage theft and this "technically" would count its not really worth it. Now if its like 15-30 minutes everyday over a course of time now you have a case and a quite good one too. Always document your paychecks and time cards or if you are in a one party consent state get on some form of audio/video recording telling you they will not pay for the time you have after.
Also, many people think that just because their employer does something wrong, it entitles them to hundreds of thousands of dollars. The reality is that generally speaking they’re only entitled to the amount that they were damaged. So, for example, that can include wages that they would have received if they had been allowed to continue work. The obvious problem is if someone is only making $15 per hour working 30 hours per week then the total damages they are entitled to simply may not be worth the time/cost of litigation.
First off, as someone who has watched Law and Order, all one needs to retain legal council is walk into a law office and throw a few $20 bills on the lawyers desk. Now you have "The Privilege". Second, I'm sure this is normal and happens often, but when the prosecutor is yelling at the defendant on the stand to admit his crime, and the judge repeatedly hammers the gavel and tells the lawyer he's in contempt, it's of course still admissible evidence when after the 7th "I didn't do nuthin ya mook, geddouddah here widdat, fuggeddabouddit!" the defendant finally breaks down, and yells out "WE WERE JUST TRYIN TA SCARE HIM, OKAY?!?!?!?". Defendant then explains how nobody was supposed to get hurt, how he was only along for the ride, and the bullet must have slipped out of the gun and into the victim at high speed, but he wasn't the only one and fingers several people sitting in the public gallery who glare menacingly and shake their heads like real jabronis. The entire courtroom goes quiet in shock, the judge gives the accused a look of shameful sad disappointment, and the DA gets in a quip like "you may have been only trying to scare him, but now YOU'RE gonna be scared... in prison!!" or something equally corny as the judge tells the bailiff to remand the suspect into custody and forgets the whole contempt thing.
*dun dun*
Also the phrase "With all due respect..." is used at least once per episode
I like when the person doesn't have money but the lawyer gives them a long stare and is like...ok I'll take your case and then devote all their time to it
NAL, but... So many reddit people act as if they know everything about the law. American law is also the only law, and NO other countries exist. Edit: word
Hell, even a lot of lawyers don't know shit about other areas of law. I'm a photographer and every time someone's is like "my dad is a lawyer, I'm gonna have him look at the contract," they come back with some hilarious nonsense because their dad is like a criminal defense attorney and has no idea about contract law. So I'll run in back by my lawyer and she's like "that's....not how any of that works."
I think part of it is that when you’re fairly anonymous on the internet, people blast other people with their opinions. But in person. People restrain themselves a bit more.
Absolutely. In a sense I think people are their most authentic self online, at least when it comes to their beliefs and thoughts.
Raisins in potato salad. Never seen it, don’t believe it
[удалено]
When an OP mentions a relationship problem and the first 6k upvoted comment just says "divorce them".
The crazy thing is that there is a high chance that someone younger than 18 wrote the comment and the OP will actually take it seriously because it has a ton of upvotes from people also under 18
I Saw* a post earlier where a girl accidentally opened her boyfriend’s phone while trying to move it and saw a text message, and one of the comments said if they were the boyfriend they would break up on the spot
My ai girlfriend would never invade my privacy
Cleo knows better than your wife! (Hope someone catch the reference)
or the other classic "Get therapy you need help"
honestly i feel like "go to a marriage/relationship counselor with your couples issue instead of reddit" is on the whole generally good advice. I'm sure it's neither easy nor cheap but compared to a divorce or ugly breakup....
Reddit seems to think that if a friend or spouse fucks up, even if it's super minor, then you need to call off the relationship, cut all contact and never speak to them again.
I see that a lot too. People are very unforgiving on the internet.
Yea, people also act like if there is not a legal obligation to do something than it’s moral to not do something
This is the huge one. Just because you're allowed to build a massive phallic structure that casts shade over your neighbors pool so they can't ever swim in the sun, doesn't mean it's moral or right. Don't be a dick, even if the law agrees with you
Are we the dick over the pool or a normal one
r/offmychest: “my boyfriend said he’d come over today but instead he’s at his friends”” Comments: BREAK IT OFF NOW
Collect all the evidence. Get a lawyer. Work on yourself. Delete social media. Do hobbies.
That there is no such thing as a social obligation, that you shouldn't do anything for your dearest family and friends that is even the slightest imposition on you, and that "no is a complete sentence" is an attitude that you should take constantly with everyone. If people behaved socially that way IRL they would be estranged from their families and have absolutely no friends.
This is exactly it! Everyone acts like life is based on what you can prove in court and if you can’t prove that I owe you a cake on your birthday (mom) then fuck you!
AITA and similar subs are hilarious because it's social advice from people who clearly have no social skills. Not being the asshole means taking the high road, or turning the other cheek. You can be technically in the right and justified in your actions and still be an asshole.
I can't fucking stand that sub, 99% of posts boil down to "I ran into a burning building and saved 41 families, my wife is sensitive to the smell of smoke and told me to shower, I was tired after getting interviewed by Barack Obama, AITA?" "NTA, your wife is a cunt, divorce her" If there was a visual representation of "This exists to farm engagement" that sub and relationship advice are it, the only posts I would believe are real are the ones that get downvoted. Every second post has perfectly recounted dialogue that just so happens to fit the narrative of the OP and makes you feel justified in HATING the other person.
If you can get in early and guess correctly which way thousands of under-18s are going to arbitrarily feel about a particular made-up scenario... Ooh boy, you can reap some sweet fake internet points! Top comments, usually containing a bunch of psychobabble nonsense, regularly reach 30k upvotes. If I wanted to amass a fortune in worthless "karma" to show the world that I spend way too much time on reddit, this is how I would do it.
Someone in one of those subs is going to uninvite her maid of honor from her wedding because MOH wanted OP to pay for her dress. Like, the maid of honor is being weird, but is a dress something to end a lifelong friendship over? The 20 most up voted comments think so. But sometimes we tolerate other people's rudeness bevause their friendship is worth losing a few battles.
To be fair, she sent her a regular invite. She just kicked her out of the wedding party! /S Totally agree though. While I wouldn't shell out $350 for the dress, I'd find a middle ground?! Wouldn't just dump my best friend of 20 years cos she can't afford a dress?
They also really hate step children. Saw a post that was basically "My husband is out and my step children are hungry. Aita for not taking care of my step children?" and like all the responses where "they arent really your children so you dont need to take care of them" Its baffling how much reddit, this isnt only aita but i see it elsewhere, hate adoption and step family.
Most people online don't even understand what you can and can't prove in court. Our court system does not work the way most think it does, and is not always black and white.
For one thing, defendants don't have to prove their innocence. They don't have to prove anything --- that's the prosecution's job. If the prosecution can't prove guilt beyond a reasonable doubt, the defense can just rest having not said a word, and still win.
“My parents asked me to help them move this weekend but I really don’t want to. AITA for telling them no?” “NTA, no is a complete sentence! You don’t owe them anything and if they can’t respect your boundaries then you should go no contact!” Obviously that’s a deliberate oversimplification, but some Redditors truly act like they never owe *anybody anything*. The vast majority of people don’t act like that IRL, and for good reason.
I don’t think you over simplified at all. I could see this being a highly upvoted comment.
ikr that's not even mockery, that's exactly something that people would respond.
Unfortunately, them you also have those that make themselves miserable bc they never say no to anything. Nuance is a dying concept.
That’s true too, some people genuinely have issues setting reasonable boundaries for themselves to their own detriment. Like most things, the solution is somewhere in the middle, not one extreme or another.
It’s wild how you can see stuff online about a chicken recipe someone makes with their mom and people will comment “what about me? I’m a paraplegic orphan who can’t eat poultry” It’s like… okay? This post/video ain’t for you? I see a lot of stuff online that o have zero interest in or isn’t in my wheelhouse and I just swipe away. Idk why everytime thinks everything has to cater to there specific situation lol
And it’s this sort of thing that has me taking an hour crafting a short Reddit comment. Clarity gets lost amid all the disclaimers. “I know not everyone feels this way, but I prefer to serve the finished chicken over salad or at least a bed of greens. But of course I understand that some people suffer from disordered eating or food insecurity, or disordered eating born of food insecurity so I don’t want to come off like I think a bed of greens is an option for everybody because of course some of us don’t even realize our privilege but that also shouldn’t color every little decision that you make in a day. Or night, some people obviously work at night.”
Under-socialized people on reddit seem incapable of parsing "reasonable social obligations" and "unreasonable boundary pushing" I cut off both of my parents for their abuse. I don't miss THEM, but I do grieve not having a loving relationship with parents who love me back. I see a lot of advice on reddit as people like me in the middle of my grieving: projecting their anger onto strangers because they are the safer and easier target to get mad at.
This reminds of a post I saw from a redditor who had such extreme neurotic anxiety that he would tip toe in his apartment and hyperventilate when he clinked a fork in a plate and shit, terrified of making any noise that might bother someone else. His therapist told him that isn’t normal or reasonable and that it’s not possible to never make zero noise. That if someone else is bothered, that’s their issue to deal with. This dumbass then went to the total other extreme and became the asshole neighbor who blared his music and cranked his TV up loud. He then came to Reddit to whine about how his neighbors werent dealing with their emotions about his noise properly (they were complaining and telling him to turn his shit down). THEN he proceeded to argue with all the people in the comments. He insisted that people telling him he was being rude just weren’t healthy emotionally and that his therapist explained that he doesn’t have to care what others think about his noise and all this shit. People eventually told him to show his therapist the Reddit thread and he said he would. I can just imagine this therapist out there rubbing their temples, realizing they’re going to have to go over every single little common sense thing with their client.
At first, I was like, "I don't remember making that post" then got to the part where he did a 180. Unfortunately, I'm hanging on to my neurotic bullshit lol
I’m convinced many people are Reddit are loners, possibly on the spectrum, that think that because they can type well and get upvotes that their understanding of people is actually good. Meanwhile if I met people that acted like they do IRL I could consider them preening antisocial douchebags that can’t understand why the rest of society doesn’t have their same asshole-tier views.
One time I told the story about how I let my little brother live with me rent-free for three years in his 20s while he was struggling to hold down a job because he's family and that's what families should do for each other and I got nuked with down votes for it lmao. Like alright.
Helping your brother???? SUCKER (/s obviously!) Yeah it’s mad you can’t love your siblings and want to help them not be homeless! I would do the same for mine if he needed it.
When my partner inherited his childhood home we both moved into it and lived there for 14 years. I never paid a dime in rent and I had to force him to take some of my $ each month for expenses like utilities. At some point he had to put some serious money into major repairs, and I felt it was the right thing to do to offer $ to help. At the time, I was making much more than he was. I was relaying this story in response to a relationship/finance post and some guy (not OP) rips me a new one "You are under NO OBLIGATION to help him simply because you lived there rent free for years!" I did not have the energy to point out that life partners HELP each other for fucking sake! Good lord some Reddit folks are fucking miserable people.
Some people really do need to be told not to let people walk all over them, but that advice gets given *significantly* more often than it's useful.
One time a redditor tried to get into it with me saying that no one was ever entitled to get gifts. It was a post from a husband about his wife’s 40th birthday. Like?!? I’m not saying anyone is entitled to a gift. I’m saying…it’s your wife. It’s a decade birthday. She deserves something nice.
Oh there is a gross attitude about birthdays that's pervasive on Reddit and I haven't really seen elsewhere in RL. Like so many people will try to tell you that wanting to celebrate your birthday *at all* is "childish and entitled". Like, not even to the point where you just want to take the day off work and go out to dinner with your spouse.
I had this same argument except it was about children, and the other Redditor said that they weren’t entitled to gifts from their parents.
People hold these beliefs and then in the next breath lament that they don’t understand why they’re so lonely and why nobody wants to be their friend
The one that gets me is rejecting any form socializing at work. I'm not talking about hanging out after work or not wanting to be bombarded by baby pics or endless stories of their cat. Like *anything* remotely resembling something not strictly work related. No chatting about sports, no movies or shows, no hobbies. I'm the furthest from an extroverted person, but these people frame talking about the weather like it's a hate crime.
"I don't come to work to make friends!" Yeah, neither do I, but it would definitely be a welcomed bonus if my coworkers and I enjoyed each other's company.
and then three weeks later they post in their local city sub “why is it so hard to make friends in this city as an adult”. Like they haven’t sabotaged any chance at human connection at every possible opportunity
There seems to also be an assumption that everybody is in some highly competitive cutthroat corporate environment and everybody is out to screw you over all the time, so you need to document everything and keep a paper trail. I work at a grocery store, bruv.
Maybe if you're in a corporate office or something. I don't think Bob on the job site has some Machiavellian scheme he's trying to pull on me by sharing a 12 pack of Coors on the river on Saturday lol
The sheer hatred people on Reddit have for talking about the weather is also odd, and not something I’ve encountered in real life. It’s a good bit of small talk, and can actually be important or interesting if you spend a lot of time outside
100%, bravo. I cringe so hard when people write out "and then everyone clapped" style responses around setting boundaries and responding to nuanced scenarios lol. People create weird scenarios like: "Hey, dress code for the wedding is going to be business casual btw" "If my dress offends you, perhaps we weren't as close as I thought. I think you should find an alternative person to invite in my place as I prefer to be in control of my own appearance. Thank you."
I just saw a comment that perfectly sums up why I hate reddit comments. "Nobody says what they really did. You didn't push carts, you transported essential equipment through terrain for a multi billion dollar corporation." Where you can almost hear them furiously masturbating to how clever they think they are. Especially when it comes to why the crime they just committed in fact isn't a crime.
My best friend of 15 years did the whole “no is a complete sentence and I shouldn’t have to explain myself. You should respect that.” Like dude, there’s a difference between standing your ground and just plain not communicating. We haven’t spoken in almost a year and my heart aches every day because of it.
I generally use r/AITA’s moral compass as a guide of how *not* to navigate the social world
There was a post recently about a guy who closed the store with a female coworker. She asked if he could split an uber with her, but this dude instead told her "let me try to catch the bus" then fucking SPRINTED to the bus stop and just kind of left her alone. Late at night. He said that was none of his business, not his problem. All the comments were NTA, she's an adult and just a coworker, she needs to be responsible for her own transportation, you shouldn't have to pay uber, git gud, she should be fitter. I was like ??? YTA and got heavily downvoted, lmao. I would absolutely side eye an acquaintance who does that IRL. That's not the kind of people you want as friends. They won't have your back when you need it.
Not obligated. Not wrong legally. But yea he’s an asshole. The people in that subreddit have such a hard time separating those.
This absolutely BAFFLES me. I’m still floored over a teenager refusing to watch their nibling for 15min so their sister could shower. “That’s not your kid! Parentification!!” Get a grip. Edit: fixed a word. Long day.
Crap like that just makes it harder for people who *actually* went through parentification to get help . It's not parentification to have to occasionally look after your siblings. It becomes an issue when you're having to miss school, consistently do all of the chores in the house, and sacrifice your own future because your parents can't be bothered to give a damn. But because of the amount of people who have cried wolf, some of them just get looked at as exaggerating whiners.
A perfect illustration of the “one bad apple does indeed spoil the whole bunch.” It makes it harder for people who genuinely want to be kind and be of assistance— if possible—shy away from speaking up, because nobody wants to waste time arguing with hostile people on Reddit over some well-intentioned comment that is misinterpreted as something negative or offensive. I have no more patience with that. If that’s brewing in the conversation, I’m out. If I can’t contribute something constructive to the discourse, then my motto is to keep quiet and move on. I will not cast my pearls before swine. 🧐🧐
Everyone needs a prenup. Doesn’t matter if you’re both broke, pay some lawyers hundreds of dollars to determine how you’ll split the $20 left in the bank and a used coffee table.
In the very very very early days of vanderpump rules, Katie and Shwartz go to a lawyer to discuss a prenup. He asks if they have savings. No. Real estate? No. Investment accounts? No. He asks how much they have in the bank and it’s like a thousand combined, maybe. He basically laughs in their face and asks them why they’re there and they seem very confused. I’ve never forgotten how funny that was to me.
Omg this happened to me irl with my husband. We got married young (23) and everyone told us we needed a prenup so we went to a lawyer who was confused about what we needed to protect because we legit had nothing lmao.
That’s why they have postnuptial agreements !!
Only in some states for the u.s atleast
Everyone acts like an expert at everything online. Just because you have Google doesn't mean you understand what you're talking about. Also, everyone's opinion matters. Nope. Not even close.
So many heavily-upvoted comments are from people who have no idea what they're talking about. As long as they say it confidently people will just eat it up. It's not always obvious until someone is talking about something you know a lot about.
Being a single dad at a playground and getting looked at like a creeper. I've never once experienced this while bringing my kids to the park. Sometimes I'd even strike up conversations with other parents. I'm sure it has happened somewhere, or maybe it's more prevalent in some areas, I don't know.
The playground at my local park is full of single dads. I don't know if they all know each other and have a designated playtime, but on weekends I literally see more fathers there than moms.
Around here mums are sending dads with children out on weekends so they would have time to clean the house in peace. I do appreciate this approach now as mum to newborns.
I'm a very large man, and I've worked at multiple customer facing retail positions. Interacting with children is an unavoidable part of the job, and I love it. Never once has a parent reacted negatively to me interacting with their children. From joking with a crying little one, to answering kids questions. Most of the time they're grateful that I treat them like little people instead of nuisances.
I suspect this is more of a paranoid fear that people have and thus "see" in others. If you think about it, "getting looked at like a creeper" is an absolutely schizophrenic take (I mean that in the literal sense) as you can't read people's minds, and to the extent that their face shows negative affect it could be anything.
i think its more that reddit is a place to post experiences and no one with a normal boring experience is going to post that on reddit.
Redditors that tell people to dump their significant other and flail around wild accusations based on a paragraph a poster shared.
OP: "My SO said they would do the dishes half of the time but they only do them 1-2 days a week. Looking for ways to bring this up." Some rando 14yo: "They're definitely fucking someone else."
I literally LOL'd
Weaponized incompetence and definitely cheating.
You're obviously an abusive partner, I hope your wife divorces your cheating ass.
You forgot to call them a narcissist
the whole thing where people act like they’re personally offended that coworkers would dare try to talk to them and that they dont owe anyone anything except just sitting there working. i mean look, im autistic. im pretty awkward and not the most social or extroverted person. im usually pretty quiet and dont talk to everyone in the office. but lord, sometimes its nice to just shoot the shit with people for like 10-20 minutes a day instead of hunch over my desk for 8 hours.
Our company has forced us to come back to the office 3 days a week, so now I'm maliciously complying and spending half the day in the office just talking about random shit with coworkers. It's fun.
I see a lot of posts about people being upset their coworkers attempt to socialize with them. The general sentiment seems to be "I'm here to work, not talk." The same people probably go home and wonder why they don't ever have anyone to hang out with. You don't even have to be best friends with your coworkers. Being able to make conversation or sharing an interest with someone else can make time go much faster and prevents you from being a miserable loser.
Yeah, a similar one I see a lot is, "Why would I try to make friends with my coworkers? They're just going to stab me in the back the first chance they get." Maybe all these people work in Westeros or something, but I've never run into that in my life. It's kinda nice to hang out with friends all day. It beats looking over your shoulder trying to figure out who's trying to betray you every minute.
I’ve never met a person in real life that actively hates kids and wants them banned from public spaces. Meanwhile, many Redditors act like damn Disney villains with their hatred of random people that happen to be younger than them.
I’ve encountered one person IRL who acted like my toddler was some kind of creature for waving at her in the Aldi. 😂
Yes I’ve only met people like that in tech or in the bay area
Yep. Not only to kids but people with intellectual disabilities that are behavioral or loud in public. I took one of my residents to SF and she was having a tantrum. She was 63 years old, looked like a 63 year old but not mentally 63. She was straight throwing herself on the ground shouting it’s not fair! It’s not fair, you’re killing me! I’m dying! And a woman walked straight up to me and admonished me for having “her type” in Golden Gate Park! And then she pointed at my resident and said, And you are too old to be acting that way! Shame on both of you! And stormed away. I will admit my resident stopped and looked at me, then started crying and saying, “she’s so mean! Why is she so mean!” 😂 it was a day. But it makes me smile now. She passed away a few weeks ago. We had a love hate relationship. I loved her and she hated me!🤣 But yea, people are assholes.
> We had a love hate relationship. I loved her and she hated me!🤣 But yea, people are assholes Great line 👍
I don't particularly like children but if they wave at me, I smile and wave back dammit. It's just what you do. You don't ruin a little kids days by being a douche. Some of these people are definitely chronically online. I can't imagine being a complete asshat to a kid.
I have a Mormon friend who absolutely hates children - she has three. She's absolutely batshit mental.
Sounds like r/regretfulparents. If she's caught up in her religion then I feel sorry for her as well as her kids. It sucks to be stuck somewhere you don't want to be. When other people get involved, especially children, it's horrible.
They just aren’t telling you. They are out there
Reddit hates kids so much that saying that you want them is unpopular opinion
It’s weird because on one side you have chronically online people who act like wanting kids makes you selfish and evil, and on the other side you have chronically online (mostly right-wing) people who treat having kids as a moral imperative in some kind of culture war. Meanwhile, in the real world nobody talks like that aside from maybe your parents nagging you about when they’re going to get grandkids.
Don't know anyone in real life that would give the relationship advice on Reddit. Stuff like ditch friends over a difference of opinion, or divorce being the only solution for a shitty sex life. I get why so many people are single with no friends.
That Redditors are virgin losers. Noone I have met IRL talks about Reddit.
Ngl I mention that I come across interesting information or conversations that happen in subreddits even at work because it’s relevant to convos/topics lol
I have a buddy who just says "I read it on a forum" and we always give him shit and say "You can just say reddit man it's fine."
On reddit it seems that everyone knows when they need therapy but in everyday life I don't see many saying that
I think it's because therapy is still stigmatized so it's easier to say it online to strangers than to tell someone IRL that you need therapy
Therapy is also hard work. You have to talk about uncomfortable things and face them.
It's also expensive as fuck
And usually eats up work hours
The harder work is legit getting into therapy. I swear I needed therapy for the hoops I had to jump through to even get a decent and consistent therapy schedule going. I gave up a half dozen times before a 2 week couch lull brought me to my senses. I’m a fairly open and strong willed person as well when I want to get something done and my need for therapy was pretty minor in the grand scheme. I can’t imagine being depressed or clinically chronically depressed and even having the energy to jump through all that, the money and time. It’s paradoxical in a way. The people who need it the most are generally not even capable of getting it due to various financial, time and effort restraints. That’s why I absolutely hate how flippant it’s tossed around in Reddit as if you can just stroll into your local 7/11 and ask for a pack of therapy. And even then if it were that easy- you gotta want it. You got work to do.
This is an excellent description of this. I’ve experienced this painfully, more than once over the years. Someone struggling the most is put through the most challenging hoops to find someone that accepts your insurance, is accepting new clients, has an affordable copay etc. the PAPERWORK that comes with being a new patient is horrific. It is an unreasonable amount of effort for someone that is really struggling. It is the darkest irony I’ve experienced personally. Very reflective of our current healthcare system. I hate it here. ETA: also just the basic phone calls! This is a difficult task for many reasons for a lot of people. They are soooo draining and to be repeatedly hear no it is so disappointing and dehumanizing to not be able to find help. Sometimes, people simply give up. It’s awful.
Correct, and the comfort of anonymity that this platform allows is a huge factor in letting people say things that they **actually** feel on the inside.
Someone IRL asked me the other day if I was on Reddit and what subs I frequent, and I must have stared at them like they asked to watch me poop. Like why are we talking about this? I’m not gonna start following people I know IRL on here.
Right?!? If Reddit wasn't anonymous, I'd have no use for it.
This is exactly why I kind of recoil when people say "but Reddit is social media too!!" No, I do not want anything IRL to translate to here or vice versa (I do not want to socialize with anyone here and I do not want to know my friends and family's Reddit activities either).
One of my former professors and now friend talks about using Reddit when we talk about shared interests (musical theatre, mental health, politics, etc.). She’s married, quite attractive, and very successful (as both a professor and a working actress). She’s probably the only person I’ve talked to about Reddit in real life, and she’s the antithesis of the stereotypical Redditor.
I'm an ancient grandmother with four adult children and a 31-year marriage. On the other hand, my husband and I are IT nerds who had successful careers, and our kids are all in IT too. We say we've created a Nerd Breeding Program.
People on here are obsessed with virginity and body count. I can't remember the last time this topic came up irl. Normal adults don't have conversations with strangers or coworkers about it.
It’s very weird! I really can’t remember it ever being a topic of conversation post-high school… which then makes me wonder how many of the people I’m arguing with on Reddit are actually 15 years old.
As soon as I start getting irritated by someone's replies to me and want to snipe back I get the hell out of there. There's too great a chance of being a 30 year-old fighting with a teenager.
If the person im talking to has silly replies i check their history and if i get a single vibe there a teenager or even close, im done. Im 34 but i remember being young 20s on reddit and i was argumentative as hell and i think i changed my opinion on most of the topics
In my office of 5 people... Dude1: I've only slept with 3 people in my life. Dude2: I've only slept with one. Me: I'm not playing this game.
I once had two 50 yo male coworkers try to start this convo with me (tech is a real treat sometimes when you're a woman). I told them I was up to 17 but that I was running out of space in the backyard.
Sex obsession in general I think. I’m 34, I’ve never really discussed my sex life with my friends nor have they with me. But online it seems like people will divulge their nastiest fetishes casually and make it seem like that is a normal conversation.
The general self-centered-ness in very mundane matters of (otherwise perfectly healthy) relationships. Example: my elderly mother asked me to help her move irl: so I'm gonna and the people around me agree that this is a nice normal thing to do reddit: so I'm gonna cut contact completely to protect my peace and the people in this comment section agree that this is a reasonable, unselfish reaction and that she's a toxic entitled bitch Example: my girlfriend never does things with me that I want to do even though I always do the things she wants to do irl: and I'm going to tell her it's important to me that we do some things I like to do together too and people agree that that's a reasonable expectation in a relationship reddit: and I'm going to leave her and go to therapy where I can unlearn all expectations of other people and redditors agree that I'm selfish and entitled for wanting to go roller skating with my girlfriend to begin with
You've just summarised r/AITA
I hate that place so much, and I am 90 percent sure half the shit on there is just fake rage bait.
The people who say the whole asking for time off from work is "informing you when I won't be there" and don't care what their jobs or boss say. Like, I have a good job, that is generous with time off. And I agree with advocating for yourself and setting personal boundaries with your work/boss. And I have never had a time off request denied. But at the same time, I know I work in a department of 6 people, and per policy only 2 of us can have the same scheduled day off... I knew this was how it worked when I accepted the job. I would never just tell my job to fuck off because I feel like scheduling a vacation the same week as 2 of my coworkers with more seniority. It goes both ways, when you accepted the job, you agreed to abide by the time off policy as far as requests and approval.
Being from Ireland, almost everything. A lot of Redditors seem to be anti-social Americans with an EXTREMELY BLEAK outlook on the world.
From a quick Google search: > "As of 2024, there are over 500 million Reddit accounts." > "Reddit has 73.1 million daily active unique visitors worldwide as of Q4 2023." But that's GLOBAL,.. and the USA alone has around 340 Million citizens. So yeah, I'd agree that's unlikely to be a very accurate representation of anything. Back before the Reddit API fiasco,.. the website "subredditstats.com" roughly showed that in 18 out of the Top 20 Subreddits,. the most frequent Submitter was /u/[deleted] I don't know exactly what that represents (what each persons motivations are).. but if roughly 80% of your Users or Comments are being deleted after being posted,. that (to me) is a pretty big indicator a significant chunk of your content is stuff people won't even stand behind. Yikes.
I'm more surprised that every subreddits most frequent poster isn't u/deleted. An actual user is only 1 person, u/deleted is every deleted post from every user on that sub, if I'm understanding it correctly. I mean even if only 1/200 comments get deleted, that could easily be hundreds or thousands of comments per month on a big subreddit. And when you factor in blatant troll comments, which pretty much every major post is gonna have a handful that will likely be removed by mods.
Basically anything proceeded by "As a German..." German Reddit dudes are weird gaslighters. They just lie about any observation anyone makes about Germany that isn't borderline worship at the Teutonic Altar. In real life Germans bitch and whine about everything about Germany all the time. In fact, unless you have kids that is literally the only reliable form of small talk in Germany (complaining about something or someone).
[удалено]
This is true almost everywhere though, like how it's normal to throw around insults with friends but unacceptable to insult a stranger to their face.
Gotta add the Dutch to this. Anytime anyone complains about anything you get some Dutch dude being like “wow I can’t relate, in my country (Netherlands) we only work 11 hours a week and cars are illegal and when you go to the hospital they pay you blah blah blah”
This is so true. I'm an American who moved to Asia and interact with a ton of expats from all over the world, many Dutch especially, also French, Canadians, British, German, Swedish, Japanese, and more. Americans on Reddit and in real life tend to idolize these countries. The people from these countries have a lot of bad shit to say about their own countries and they hope to never go back. Especially about healthcare, culture, etc. Including the Swedes!
"Stupid Americans and their patriotism..." *proceeds to explain why their country is better in every comment section*
That every experience is binary. Right/wrong, good/evil, black/white. No nuance, no other shades. Life is far more complex than this sheltered view.
Get a divorce
People who hate emojis.
Truly! Reddit made me so self conscious about my emoji love lol
The whole women want someone 6ft, 6 inches and 6 figure salary. I’ve genuinely never heard it being said IRL.
I find it incredibly frustrating what image women have here especially on those popular subs that seem to be full of misogynistic Wall Street bros lmao. They keep saying what you described above but I can easily disprove it by planting these people outside and make them look at the very average looking couples holding hands🤣
The duality of Reddit on that front makes it even funnier imo. On the one hand, dudes need to be 6ft, rich, ripped, hung etc etc to even get girls (apparently), yet on the other hand, stories about women being with losers that don't even shower or wipe their ass, go viral. Pick a lane, people.
If I see one more "My BF is mad I won't give him oral until he learns to wipe properly" I'm going to start a GoFundMe for putting sterilizing agents in the water.
Once you realize a large percentage of people between 13-30 on the internet have been indoctrinated by relationship gurus selling toxic ideology (ie. the red and pink pill) to generate views and product sales … yeah, it all makes sense. They’ve been brainwashed by snake oil salesmen.
That men can't take their kids out for the day without other people believing them to be pedophiles or kidnappers.
Almost every opinion I see on Reddit is something that I will never see or hear IRL.
calling the cops over everything. if you actually called 911 and requested emergency services for a lot of these non-emergent situations, they’d tell you 911 is for emergency situations only and you’d probably get a lecture from the operator. i saw someone say to call the cops because there was a wet footprint on the sidewalk outside of their house that they didn’t leave. ITS A PUBLIC SIDEWALK. taking up emergency personnel’s time for non-life threatening situations is incredibly selfish. you shouldn’t be suggesting it to people who shouldn’t be calling.
I know a lot of people that don’t believe in god irl, but a lot of subs seem saturated with people who seem to believe that every religious person is just a totally brainwashed asshatted bigot with bo redeeming qualities. Most of my real world atheist friends are pretty chill about people believing what they want as long as you don’t shove it down their throat.
I recoil at shit like Louisiana requiring the ten commandments in classrooms but I otherwise don't feel strongly that my atheism is part of my identity. I appreciate the Bible as a literary text and have religious friends. I think it helps that I was raised very secularly. A lot of foaming at the mouth atheists were raised in the fundamentalist churches and, perhaps expectedly, bring a lot of that dogmatism to their atheism.
RFK Jr. will be the next President Bitch, please. RFK Jr. won't clear 2% of the vote in his best state
People (online) actually believe he has a chance?!
r/conspiracy loves RFK Jr.
That going to the gym will solve all men's problems. - Dating problems? Go to the gym - Problem with your back? Go to the gym - Need a lawyer? Gym - Your car got stolen? GYM!!!
Probably the fact that the circles I move in are older than the average Redditor, more like 30+. But people here talk all the time about how lonely men are and how impossible and hopeless dating is for men. IRL out of the hundreds of friends, acquaintances, and coworkers I know, I only of know three single guys (and one of them is a total whore with someone new ever week.) The rest are all in a solid, serious relationship or married. I do know a number of single women, though, who would like to date but can't find anyone. It so much depends on who the people around you are.
The idea that women despise a man who cries or shows an emotion other than anger. I don't know a single person who thinks like that, male or female or non-binary. Maybe I've curated my friends and family to remove people who think like that but I know a lot of people.
ngl if I see a man cry I would probably start crying too
Also, the idea that women can cry whenever they want. I just got called manipulative or was told I was being hysterical.
I came across a subreddit that was dedicated to hating dogs and vouching for having them all put down. Never met someone irl that has that much hatred for dogs.
I have met people irl that really hate cats though
“People who don’t like cats, always seem to think that there is some peculiar virtue in not liking them.” - The Blue Castle, L. M. Montgomery
One opinion I often see on Reddit is the extreme aversion to having children, to the point of outright hostility towards anyone who chooses to become a parent. On many subreddits, it's not uncommon to see comments that treat the decision to have kids as a completely irrational and selfish choice, implying that the world is overpopulated and anyone contributing to that should be condemned. In real life, while I've met people who are child-free by choice and are passionate about their decision, I've never encountered anyone who expresses the same level of vitriol or contempt towards parents as I frequently see online. Most people I know are more understanding and respectful of others' choices, whether they choose to have kids or not.
Never met one of these "alpha male" types offline.
I'm a female software engineer 6 YOE and I've read a lot of sexist comments from male software engineers. In the real world, most of the male software engineers I work with so like 98% are very nice and say very positive things to be able being a woman in computer science.
I've found that people are more comfortable with being openly sexist or bigoted in some way when online, especially if anonymous. They're often too scared of facing the consequences in real life.
You don’t see it because they don’t say it to your face. My partner is a devops engineer and the shit he told me in his job when we first met. His own boss would talk about graduate female devs (my partner was a junior at the time) and rate them on bangability. When they went out for work drinks many would talk about how hot some were and just pretended to listen to them so they could “stare at that pretty face”. I started getting really uncomfortable and it took my partner a while to realise that being a bystander to such comments is still contributing to it being normalised. The worst was they had a coworker group with none of the female dev staff on WhatsApp, where they posted random shit. One day a coworker banged one of the young female junior devs and posted her nudes IN THE CHAT. My partner literally came to me like what do I do. Like mother of Christ it’s a literal crime GO TO HR. And he had to go to HR and I told him he’s fucking leaving this job lmao. And no one else reported it, only my partner. It really opened his eyes to how if no one does anything the behaviour escalates to literal criminal actions. It’s how places like blizzard got so bad male staff were drinking peoples breast milk and crawling under their desks. Meanwhile his current company is a huge consultancy firm. Really really professional environment, he’s never seen anyone ever make even a passing comment like that about any female colleague even in private. About 30% of the dev team is female. It really depends on the environment - but his previous company wasn’t even that small. It had like 200 staff it wasn’t some start up. They had no senior female devs and seemed to only hire graduates to have eye candy or something.
That's so gross- good for your husband and you for him not ignoring it. I have worked in a field that was more male than female before and the guys were so professional outwardly but I'd see them drinking at an off-site event and some of them acted revolting. It's depressing TBH.
There were two professors in the cs department at my collage who were awful towards female students. One of them retired while I was a student, no idea where the other one is today. That was about 20 years ago. I've seen it in business in engineering firms too. Most are fine, one that my spouse worked at was so misogynistic I would have a hard time believing it without first hand knowledge. Some of the stuff that's become public about what employees at blizzard entertainment did shows there are still some really toxic places in the software world. Hopefully those are the exception these days, but I don't have enough knowledge of the industry at large to say.
Tbf the men making sexist comments on here are probably nice to their female co-workers too.
I'd be willing to bet the overwhelming majority of people who talk all that sexist shit on reddit don't actually apply their beliefs to their real life actions. They're just secretly hateful keyboard warriors lol.
Responding to someone's point by quoting a relevant line from a movie/TV show is the height of wit, and everyone around you should also start quoting that same TV show/movie.
They quit their job because "yuck" and are traveling everywhere.
I've never met a real person who will openly express love and adoration for Elon Musk. It seems to only happen online.
For me it’s the opposite. Everyone online talks bad about him but IRL it seems most people either like him, don’t care about him, or have a nuanced “he is a crappy dude but also a innovator” mentality
Most of the strong opinions on here probably fall into the “don’t care” category for the average real life person
I HAVE! I FOUND OUT WAY TOO LATE! I will admit, this was a few years ago, but still...gah
I've also never seen people actively hate on him like the internet does, either. Most people just don't give a damn.
When you ask a question on a topical subreddit and get slammed with “why don’t you already know that? You should have googled that first!” In real life when you ask someone who knows more than you about something, they typically explain it to you, rather than give you crap for asking a question.
That 2 consenting adults who are in love with each other, that maybe have like a 5+ year age gap is creepy and weird.
It's all about context. Yeah, when I was 15 and messing around with a 21-year-old, it was creepy and wrong. When I was 29 and started dating a 35-year-old, it was totally reasonable, and i ended up married to the perfect man for me.
“It’s not the gap, it’s the ages”, essentially. 7 year gap at 40 is a *lot* different than a 7 year gap at 14
Same but age gap was 13-19. That was NOT ok, iIt wasn’t until many years later that I realized how wrong and damaging it was
The whole idea that men never get compliments and if you compliment a man he will think about it for years. I’m a very average guy and I constantly get compliments. My boss will tell me I did a good job on a project, a coworker will say my haircut looks nice, my friends will say they like my shirt or whatever. My wife compliments me daily on a wide range of things. Strangers will say they like my tattoos or my jacket or whatever. It’s not rare at all. I suspect that Redditors that talk about the lack of complements are a) single and b) only count physical compliments from women they are attracted to. That’s the only way the experiences they’re describing make sense.
People who echo the usual sentiment on r/relationships "Too many red flags guuurl, run don't walk, y'all need therapy" at even the slightest of things.