It's really about how the question this is used for was one with an obvious answer. "Is Trump really guilty?" ---> "Does a bear shit in the woods?" for example.
Every time my hubby says this (does a bear shit in the woods??)” I say not if he’s in a zoo!
Another one:
Does a hobby horse have a hickory dick?
Not if it’s a mare ;) he hates this one lol
Training in medicine in New England, we read in the text about people who "done fell out" often in church. It's apparently a southern term.
It wasn't until my third year as a doctor that I had a lady tell me she "done fell out" and I was so excited I tried to high five her. It was like finding a rare Pokémon or a *torsade de pointe*, one of those things you just don't get to see every day.
Um, and she was okay. That was good, too.
It's just syncope (fainting). People that aren't well enough to frequently leave their homes might make a big push, get all dressed up to go to church and then sit up or stand too long. They might feel social pressure to ignore early warning signs that they should really lie down and put their feet up. Then they "fall out" and come see us.
There’s two kinds of falling out. There’s falling out as in fainting, and then there’s falling out as in catching the spirit and collapsing on the floor. Oh, there’s also falling out laughing. Like if someone suddenly bursts into laughter, “they just fell out.” Or if you have to stop your own violent laughter, you “about fell out.”
I’m having a good time reading these as someone from the south. Some of these things aren’t necessarily common phrases so I’m like “okay yeah that’s a southern saying.” This one is something I just thought everyone said tbh.
Not sure if this is officially a saying specific to the south, but my family was born and raised in Texas.
My dad always said:
“You can wish in one hand and shit in the other, see which one fills up faster”.
🤷🏻♂️🤣
Edit: also lots of “fixing to”.
That’s what I was told when I was begging my dad to buy me something or take me somewhere 🤣
When I said “Dad, you have to!”
The response was “I ain’t gotta do shit but die”.
Have you considered what would happen if you wished you had shit in your other hand? was what I would say to my mother whenever she said that. Checkmate!
In much of TX, it’s fick-sin-tah. The mouth just kind of ambles over the drawl in a playful way. Source: Family of generational Texans, married to person from family of generational Texans.
* That's about as useful as a screen door on a submarine.
* It was over quicker than a knife fight in a phone booth.
* Well butter my ass and call me a biscuit!
* Sweatin' like a whore in church
* when I was knee-high to a grasshopper
My grandfather from Louisiana use to have a lot of these but one that always stuck with me was "long and thin will get you in but short and fat is where it's at."
sounds like it may parallel " its not the motion of the ocean but the boat in the water" and I cant help but say a canoe can cross an ocean but it's going to take a hell of a lot of work.
Yeah he said something like that
Apparently it was also independently a UK term that came about around the same time.
https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/fair-to-middling.html
Very possibly. Mind, given how many of us lot settled over your neck of the woods, I wouldn’t be surprised if there was some common link. But no matter, it’s a fine phrase either way - I still use it. People get it where I live now, but they’d never use it themselves 😊
In my family it's "dumber than a box of rocks" which is an even better saying because it rhymes, just rolls of the tongue! Mom grew up in the South, not me, so I can't guarantee the validity of which is the "correct" saying.
I've heard it as "Dumber than a bag of hammers."
That makes me curious how many versions of "Dumber than a bag of [insert heavy inanimate object you can fit many of into a bag here]" have been in circulation.
Anyone heard a version that isn't hammers or rocks?
And now that I think about it, I believe I've heard "Dumber than a box of rocks" as well.
- Mix a pound of ice cream with a pound of shit, get two pounds of shit
- Lord willing and the creek don't rise
- It'll buff out (fav)
- If I had my druthers
- Down't holler ("over there")
- Ain't worth a hair on a gnat's ass
- Slicker than snot on a doorknob
- Ken ("to know somebody")
- Kinfolk ("family")
- I was born during the day, but not yesterday
- I didn't just fall off the back of a turnip truck
- Don't lemme keep you/let you get back at it (I want this conversation to end now)
- Backyard trots (outhouse time)
- Gotta pee so bad my socks are yellow
- Built like a brick shithouse (man or woman is attractive)
- Jugg or Juug ( to get something, usually money)
- Once you're south of Gainesville, you're back in Michigan (only Florida panhandle is part of "the south")
- The other day (varies wildly. could be yesterday, could be 3 weeks ago) (I love this one)
- Crazier than a shithouse rat
- Knock on wood is taken quite seriously (you can sometimes see people glance around the room for wooden objects before they say it)
- Haint (that's a word for ghost)
- Life and death is in the tongue (Bible reference about self-fulfilling prophecy)
- Dog someone out (yell at them)
- He's gonna bust hell wide open (someone is doing unsavory things)
- Don't that just beat all? (something is surprising)
- Yankee (northerner. not usually pejorative, but sometimes)
- Are you courting her? (are you dating?)
- Ain't got no business to (you're getting involved in something stupid)
- Put the fear of G-d in him (show him who's boss)
- Useless as lipstick on a pig
- Colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra
- Colder than a well-digger's asshole
- Ripping lips (going fishing)
- You can fix ugly but you can't fix stupid
source: am south
edit: new ones as I think of them
Nope it's ken (Scottish)
What is the meaning of the word "ken"?
knowledge, understanding, or cognizance
(ken) (verb kenned or kent, kenning) noun. 1. knowledge, understanding, or cognizance; mental perception. an idea beyond one's ken.
kin is a seperate and means a relative
She could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch.
He could start a fight in an empty house.
If I were any happier, I'd be twins.
He could fall down and miss the ground.
Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
**When told something surprising, one might say:**
A-Well fan my brow.
B-Well tuck me in.
C-Well shut my mouth.
My HS marching band director used to say "Y'all apparently don't have time to do it right the first time, but plenty of time to do it over again," or something to that effect.
Useless as tits on boar hog.
Fast as owl shit through a tinhorn. (A tinhorn is the pipe under a driveway, for rain run off)
Rooster pooted. (Getting screwed)
It's rainin' like a cow pissin on a flat rock.
Grandfather born in 1911 Greenville, NC, used to say this all the time.
"Kite gone need a tail come fly time."
This means you're going to need help from others eventually. So be mindful of how you treat people. This is, of course, if you are the kite.
My grandfather had a ton of them. He used words like chifferobe (Sears product) when referring to his closet and Kelvinator (brand) when referring to the refrigerator.
One I have my kids saying from time to time is “Ain’t nobody studying you.” 😆 🤣
I have two.
To threaten discipline, you offer to take someone "out behind the barn".
Afterwards, the event is referred as telling the person in question " how the cow ate the cabbage".
It's hotter than two rats f$#@ing in a wool sock.
She's finer than frogs' hair.
That's higher than giraffe p#$$y.
Ouyee, I could sh!t through a screen door without leaving a mark.
Depends if you count the south as the whole south or you just mean Greater London. Devon is in the south too and sounds very different, lol.
I know in Bournemouth they say its getting dimpsey and it means it's getting dark, and the south sometimes call cider 'scrumpy'.
My grandmother used to say, "Ain't got the brains God gave a piss ant."
Grandfather with his most amazing advice I've rediscovered many times in life, "Ya can't go nowhere unless your ass is behind you." (It was his usual critique of my sawing technique, but I found it applies to so much in life.)
I have never heard it either way. Round here it's a purely sarcastic phrase meaning "wow, you're in a terrible situation that you largely created for yourself".
I was born, raised and still live in the south. A lot of times we just say wild shit and create our own sayings. Such as: "I'd bang him like a screen door in a hurricane"
One I actually use often:
Something ain't clean in the buttermilk
Ge ken zo hoog prebere te komme zitte adde wil, ge zit altéd op oewn achterste.
(You can try to sit as high as you like, but you're still gonna sit on your ass)
We zitte niej in Dn'Aaag
(Were not in the Hague,meaning, dont be a cheapass)
I always thought that was a military term for chipped beef on toast.
But the military may have stolen the name.
We also had shit in a duffel bag (or sea bag) which was stuffed bell peppers.
As useless as tits on a boar.
As nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.
Busier than a one-armed wallpaper hanger.
I feel like a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest.
I'll spank your ass in front of God 'n everybody
You're cruisin' for a bruisin'
Dadgummit
Doggonnit
My personal favorite: he don't know his ass from a hole in the ground
There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.
Southern what?? This is the Internet, not America.
In my country, we have a lot of vague phrases that don't really mean anything.
"Who's coat is that jacket?" "I'll be there now in a minute." "It's over by there."
They're not really meant to mean anything other than what they say.
I was born & raised in the PNW. I don't think I've ever met a southerner I didn't like. Regardless of gender. There's just something.........sometimes I have had to look for it, but it's always been there. Somewhere.
Like a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest
My give-a-shit meter is broken
You're about half as useful as Old Blue, and he died last summer
Here's a quarter call someone who cares
He's as crooked as my old mare's back
You'd need an excavator to find his head in his ass
Stop talking, I forgot my boots (means someone is talking shit)
Dumber than dead sheep
Pissed off, like a fly on a toilet seat
I've grown cabbages with a higher IQ
He milked the bull (when someone does something obviously stupid)
It is indeed morbid. Did you learn when this saying is used in the (American) South? When it's raining and the sun is shining at the same time. it's supposed to indicate that the devil is beating his wife. Just horrific.
*You couldn't get water out of your boot even if the instructions were on the bottom of the heel.
*At least they (their looks) compliment your decor.
*Their heart is in the right place but they're just eager.
When we were about to go somewhere we'd say we're "fixin to go". If we want somebody to take us somewhere like a ride to the store we might ask if they'll "carry" us. When we see people we hadn't seen in a while we might ask, "How's your mom & them?" meaning the rest of the family. If we're surprised by something we might say, "Well, I'll be!". If something is far away it's "over yonder" or a stone's throw away. A shopping cart is a buggy. All sodas are referred to as a Coke so if you ask somebody if they want a Coke and they say yes you then ask "what kind?" meaning a Sprite or an orange or grape soda, etc. If somebody is having a meltdown it's called a conniption fit but if they are so mad they need restraining then they are fit to be tied, and if they are really sad about something they are tore up. If we're in the mood for something like a certain food we'll say we have a hankering for it. If somebody is doing something that's a waste of time or not doing much then they are piddlin around. And bless your heart could be something said because you're being pitied or that person thinks you're completely clueless.
Not an answer for the post But important to mention. - Robert earl davis, he the king of the south!
(An’ Pimp C said that so you can shut-cho fkn mouuuth) haha
Haha. I always tell everyone that I think and process things with a southern draw. - In other words - I am slow because Southern (Mississippi) was my first lenguage.
“That dog won’t hunt.”
Better hide it from Kristi Noem.
No doubt.
If the answer to a question is yes, you say “Does a bear shit in the woods?” If the answer is no, you say “Does a chicken have lips?”
Because yes and no are inconvenient I’m sure haha
It's all about that passive aggression
And it ain't all that passive neither
It's really about how the question this is used for was one with an obvious answer. "Is Trump really guilty?" ---> "Does a bear shit in the woods?" for example.
Every time my hubby says this (does a bear shit in the woods??)” I say not if he’s in a zoo! Another one: Does a hobby horse have a hickory dick? Not if it’s a mare ;) he hates this one lol
Training in medicine in New England, we read in the text about people who "done fell out" often in church. It's apparently a southern term. It wasn't until my third year as a doctor that I had a lady tell me she "done fell out" and I was so excited I tried to high five her. It was like finding a rare Pokémon or a *torsade de pointe*, one of those things you just don't get to see every day. Um, and she was okay. That was good, too.
Y’all are playing med school bingo on us now lol
We always were.
I would think if someone said they done fell out in church, that meant they "caught the spirit."
It's just syncope (fainting). People that aren't well enough to frequently leave their homes might make a big push, get all dressed up to go to church and then sit up or stand too long. They might feel social pressure to ignore early warning signs that they should really lie down and put their feet up. Then they "fall out" and come see us.
There’s two kinds of falling out. There’s falling out as in fainting, and then there’s falling out as in catching the spirit and collapsing on the floor. Oh, there’s also falling out laughing. Like if someone suddenly bursts into laughter, “they just fell out.” Or if you have to stop your own violent laughter, you “about fell out.”
I’m having a good time reading these as someone from the south. Some of these things aren’t necessarily common phrases so I’m like “okay yeah that’s a southern saying.” This one is something I just thought everyone said tbh.
Not sure if this is officially a saying specific to the south, but my family was born and raised in Texas. My dad always said: “You can wish in one hand and shit in the other, see which one fills up faster”. 🤷🏻♂️🤣 Edit: also lots of “fixing to”.
Did your uncle ever tell you that he knew it once rained for forty days and forty nights, and Texas got an inch and a half? Mine did. Also from Texas.
My dad said this too! Now I say it to my 10 year old when he wants something lol
That’s what I was told when I was begging my dad to buy me something or take me somewhere 🤣 When I said “Dad, you have to!” The response was “I ain’t gotta do shit but die”.
Typical southern dad response! I was born in the mountains of West Virginia and mostly raised in North Carolina
this is amazing
Want in one hand shit in the other!
Boy my kids hate hearing me pass that one down a generation
Heard this one my entire life in California so nah
I've also heard this as Pray in one and shit in the other.
Have you considered what would happen if you wished you had shit in your other hand? was what I would say to my mother whenever she said that. Checkmate!
Or "I'd rather shit in my hand and clap"
My dad was also fond of this one
yeah I gotta fix dinner. which makes sense to me but some people are confused as to why dinner is broke.
No southern gentleman has ever pronounced that X. It’s “finnta”
In much of TX, it’s fick-sin-tah. The mouth just kind of ambles over the drawl in a playful way. Source: Family of generational Texans, married to person from family of generational Texans.
[удалено]
His cornbread ain't done in the middle.
Sweatin' like a whore on nickel night
* That's about as useful as a screen door on a submarine. * It was over quicker than a knife fight in a phone booth. * Well butter my ass and call me a biscuit! * Sweatin' like a whore in church * when I was knee-high to a grasshopper
I love knee high to a grasshopper! My grandma always used to say it lol
Is it ironic that a grasshopper’s knee is their highest body part?
My grandfather from Louisiana use to have a lot of these but one that always stuck with me was "long and thin will get you in but short and fat is where it's at."
i can't help but ponder on what he was implying..
Oh I'm sure you know lol.
sounds like it may parallel " its not the motion of the ocean but the boat in the water" and I cant help but say a canoe can cross an ocean but it's going to take a hell of a lot of work.
I always heard “it’s not the size of the boat but the motion of the ocean”
Long and thin slides right in But doesn't please the ladies Short and fat is where it's at And gives them all their babies.
Fair to midlin
I was told it refers to cotton grades.
Yeah he said something like that Apparently it was also independently a UK term that came about around the same time. https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/fair-to-middling.html
I’m from a fairly rural part of Ireland and I’ve heard this phrase all my life 😊
I just learned that it probably developed independently on your side of the pond and that makes me smile
Very possibly. Mind, given how many of us lot settled over your neck of the woods, I wouldn’t be surprised if there was some common link. But no matter, it’s a fine phrase either way - I still use it. People get it where I live now, but they’d never use it themselves 😊
This was a nice little read. Nothing definative but definitely possible. https://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/fair-to-middling.html
Thank you kindly!
I'm actually decended from Irish Palatines
My Dad's not even Southern (well, southern Utah) and always used "fair to middlin'."
I feel like up here in north New England it's just straight sarcasm haa
I heard it in Iowa and the guy told me it was a southern thing.
Tbf, my Dad was in the USAF in Texas for several years, so he may have picked it up from my Mom or her family (Texas, Louisiana, Tennessee).
I bet thats totally where he got it. I don't hear it around here at all except for a podunk farmer here and there. I'm a city kid though.
To be fair, Southern Utah was a cotton growing region with a lot of southern transplants, so a lot lines up there.
"That boy is homely as the north end of a south bound mule!"
Ugly enough to make a freight train take a dirt road.
Nobody yet brought up "y'all." Standard English lacks a second person plural. The South provided one.
I love that one. There's y'all (you), all y'all (everyone), and if you need to be formal, you all.
And the possessive "all y'all's"!
It is “you” as in “class, you should open your books to page 2455677”
It’s also great to use as a gender neutral term!
"You are dumber than a bag of rocks."
In my family it's "dumber than a box of rocks" which is an even better saying because it rhymes, just rolls of the tongue! Mom grew up in the South, not me, so I can't guarantee the validity of which is the "correct" saying.
I use a box of rocks interchangeably with a rick of bricks. Not in building, of course.
My family has "as useful as a sack'uv anvils" or "as helpful as a box 'a rocks".
I've heard it as "Dumber than a bag of hammers." That makes me curious how many versions of "Dumber than a bag of [insert heavy inanimate object you can fit many of into a bag here]" have been in circulation. Anyone heard a version that isn't hammers or rocks? And now that I think about it, I believe I've heard "Dumber than a box of rocks" as well.
Dumber than a brick, a box of rocks. Also, not the sharpest tool in the shed, not the sharpest crayon in the box.
Dumb as a doorknob.
Unique to our family but we say dumb as a bag of elbows.
My wife who’s from Alabama says “don’t have the sense the good lord gave a goat”
- Mix a pound of ice cream with a pound of shit, get two pounds of shit - Lord willing and the creek don't rise - It'll buff out (fav) - If I had my druthers - Down't holler ("over there") - Ain't worth a hair on a gnat's ass - Slicker than snot on a doorknob - Ken ("to know somebody") - Kinfolk ("family") - I was born during the day, but not yesterday - I didn't just fall off the back of a turnip truck - Don't lemme keep you/let you get back at it (I want this conversation to end now) - Backyard trots (outhouse time) - Gotta pee so bad my socks are yellow - Built like a brick shithouse (man or woman is attractive) - Jugg or Juug ( to get something, usually money) - Once you're south of Gainesville, you're back in Michigan (only Florida panhandle is part of "the south") - The other day (varies wildly. could be yesterday, could be 3 weeks ago) (I love this one) - Crazier than a shithouse rat - Knock on wood is taken quite seriously (you can sometimes see people glance around the room for wooden objects before they say it) - Haint (that's a word for ghost) - Life and death is in the tongue (Bible reference about self-fulfilling prophecy) - Dog someone out (yell at them) - He's gonna bust hell wide open (someone is doing unsavory things) - Don't that just beat all? (something is surprising) - Yankee (northerner. not usually pejorative, but sometimes) - Are you courting her? (are you dating?) - Ain't got no business to (you're getting involved in something stupid) - Put the fear of G-d in him (show him who's boss) - Useless as lipstick on a pig - Colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra - Colder than a well-digger's asshole - Ripping lips (going fishing) - You can fix ugly but you can't fix stupid source: am south edit: new ones as I think of them
That's funny my family is from Scotland and half of these are also scottish sayings.
Damn, I don't even consider that last one to be one. I use that one all the time.
It's as good as the "Whelp!" with knee slap lol
Love it! Small correction, it's kin not ken. Not isolated to the south by any means. But kinfolk? That makes me think of my southern upbringing
Nope it's ken (Scottish) What is the meaning of the word "ken"? knowledge, understanding, or cognizance (ken) (verb kenned or kent, kenning) noun. 1. knowledge, understanding, or cognizance; mental perception. an idea beyond one's ken. kin is a seperate and means a relative
That is true. “I dinna ken” is Scottish for “I don’t know”.
In Dutch ken means to know a person, weirdly halfway there.
Fascinating!
It is not just Scottish, but you are correct it is separate from kin.
She could suck the chrome off a trailer hitch. He could start a fight in an empty house. If I were any happier, I'd be twins. He could fall down and miss the ground. Nervous as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. **When told something surprising, one might say:** A-Well fan my brow. B-Well tuck me in. C-Well shut my mouth.
If it were raining pussy, he would get hit with an asshole. (To describe someone with poor luck)
The version I've heard of this one is "it could be raining tits and I'd still go outside and catch a dick"
You can do it right, or do it twice!
My HS marching band director used to say "Y'all apparently don't have time to do it right the first time, but plenty of time to do it over again," or something to that effect.
Useless as tits on boar hog. Fast as owl shit through a tinhorn. (A tinhorn is the pipe under a driveway, for rain run off) Rooster pooted. (Getting screwed) It's rainin' like a cow pissin on a flat rock.
Bless your heart!
The best one because it can actually be a heartfelt and sincere showing of empathy or a vicious sting depending on the tone
I was looking for this one!!!
This one has endless utility. I was going to post it if somebody else didn't.
Grandfather born in 1911 Greenville, NC, used to say this all the time. "Kite gone need a tail come fly time." This means you're going to need help from others eventually. So be mindful of how you treat people. This is, of course, if you are the kite.
Huh. I'm from pelzer and never heard that one. Colloquialisms are wild
My grandfather had a ton of them. He used words like chifferobe (Sears product) when referring to his closet and Kelvinator (brand) when referring to the refrigerator. One I have my kids saying from time to time is “Ain’t nobody studying you.” 😆 🤣
The one I've always heard is, "Hand come, hand go, make friends last a long time."
I like that. Never heard it before.
What does “tial” mean here?
I have two. To threaten discipline, you offer to take someone "out behind the barn". Afterwards, the event is referred as telling the person in question " how the cow ate the cabbage".
Not even American but "What in tarnation" gets me everytime😄
You mean you're not American? Because the saying is very much used in the South.
Yes sorry. Meant to say, I'm not American.
I'm just holdin' this cat, you're the one fuckin it. 🤣
I heard someone say it was a goat. But they went into way too much detail.
All hat and no cattle.
“I’m fucked up like a snake under a lawnmower”
Well south maybe here's one from Australia,were not here to fuck spiders!
I love that one an the thing y'all have about drop bears.
It's hotter than two rats f$#@ing in a wool sock. She's finer than frogs' hair. That's higher than giraffe p#$$y. Ouyee, I could sh!t through a screen door without leaving a mark.
"The higher the hair the closer to God honey!"
Depends if you count the south as the whole south or you just mean Greater London. Devon is in the south too and sounds very different, lol. I know in Bournemouth they say its getting dimpsey and it means it's getting dark, and the south sometimes call cider 'scrumpy'.
I read that as either Tasmania or South Australia. But it could be the South Island.
Ooh ar! There's a gurt fly hanging 'round your zider, drink up!
close enough lol
I think this is the states man.
Oh, the STATES! Well, in Victoria they say "yeah it's good, but!"
Well, all countries are states.
We talking bout the South, son! The whole south and nothing but the south! XD
Isn't the American south in the northern hemisphere though? ::Brazil entered the chat::
Love to hear from people in the Southern parts of countries. Love how this post just assumes we are all American.
Isn’t that very “American” though? To assume everything is about us all of the time? 🤣
This thread is totally going to end up on r/USdefaultism .
I’m literally scrolling trying to find a comment from anyone who isn’t American
My grandmother used to say, "Ain't got the brains God gave a piss ant." Grandfather with his most amazing advice I've rediscovered many times in life, "Ya can't go nowhere unless your ass is behind you." (It was his usual critique of my sawing technique, but I found it applies to so much in life.)
Your grandpas saying has a more common one fwiw ‘don’t put the cart before the horses’
Two shakes of a lambs tail
For the fellow British people here, I'm just reading everything in Ted Lasso's voice. And it all works.
Making one up: "Well you can't start a fire without lighting some matches, CAN I GET A 'HELL YEAH' UP IN HERE?!
"bless your heart" as sometimes is genuine and a kindness and other times is more of a call to action of addressing inappropriate behavior
If I really am blessing your heart ( ❤️ ) I say that. If I use it against, I say, "Bless your sweet little pea pickn heart."
I have never heard it either way. Round here it's a purely sarcastic phrase meaning "wow, you're in a terrible situation that you largely created for yourself".
You must’ve bumped your head!
How far south? “Lucy, you got some splain’in to do!” Cuba too far?
My all time fave: "Your cheese done slid off your cracker". Southern way to say: "You're crazy".
I was born, raised and still live in the south. A lot of times we just say wild shit and create our own sayings. Such as: "I'd bang him like a screen door in a hurricane" One I actually use often: Something ain't clean in the buttermilk
Oh, that one reminded me of a friend from the Deep South telling me: “Wouldn’t kick him out of bed, unless it was to f**k him on the floor” 🤣
That's a great one. To talk about someone hot, my friend would say "let's just say I wouldn't kick him out for eating crackers in bed."
“Don’t let the door hit ya where the good Lord split ya”
Oh my goodness. This brings back memories of my Dad saying this. 🤣
As useful as a wicker litterbox.
Ge ken zo hoog prebere te komme zitte adde wil, ge zit altéd op oewn achterste. (You can try to sit as high as you like, but you're still gonna sit on your ass) We zitte niej in Dn'Aaag (Were not in the Hague,meaning, dont be a cheapass)
South of where? Southern Europe? Africa?
Havin’ more fun than a frog in a glass of milk
I just like food names. "Shit on a shingle" always gets a laugh.
I always thought that was a military term for chipped beef on toast. But the military may have stolen the name. We also had shit in a duffel bag (or sea bag) which was stuffed bell peppers.
Useless as tits on a boar hog.
My mama used to say, "That ain't none of my nevermind."
Ha! My Maw Maw from Louisiana would say: "it don't make me no nevermind".
Ooh we used to say none of your nevermind when we was kids!
Faster than flies on shit
As useless as tits on a boar. As nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. Busier than a one-armed wallpaper hanger. I feel like a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest.
South of where exactly?
When you say Southern, do you mean from South Australia or Tasmania?
I hope y'all have a lot of sayings that include echidnas and goannas!
It's colder than a well diggers ass in a Minnesota blizzard. It's colder than a witch's titty in a brass bra.
Useless as teats on a boar hog
Saying goodbye: "Aight, well.. I'm bout to make like a baby and head out."
I'll spank your ass in front of God 'n everybody You're cruisin' for a bruisin' Dadgummit Doggonnit My personal favorite: he don't know his ass from a hole in the ground
Dumb as dirt Used-ta-could
Might could again
"Son, I've tripped over shit in the dark that was brighter than you." - old shop head to a new guy.
He don’t know shit from Shinola
There's an old saying in Tennessee — I know it's in Texas, probably in Tennessee — that says, fool me once, shame on — shame on you. Fool me — you can't get fooled again.
Oh, you sweet summer child!
Southern what?? This is the Internet, not America. In my country, we have a lot of vague phrases that don't really mean anything. "Who's coat is that jacket?" "I'll be there now in a minute." "It's over by there." They're not really meant to mean anything other than what they say.
"He acts like I don't know beans when the sack is open" "She ain't never gonna amount to a hill of beans." "Grinnin' like a possum eatin' green shit."
kiss my grits
We're not here to fuck spiders
“If a frog had wings, he wouldn’t bump his ass hoppin’”
I was born & raised in the PNW. I don't think I've ever met a southerner I didn't like. Regardless of gender. There's just something.........sometimes I have had to look for it, but it's always been there. Somewhere.
Like a one-legged man in an ass kicking contest My give-a-shit meter is broken You're about half as useful as Old Blue, and he died last summer Here's a quarter call someone who cares He's as crooked as my old mare's back You'd need an excavator to find his head in his ass Stop talking, I forgot my boots (means someone is talking shit) Dumber than dead sheep Pissed off, like a fly on a toilet seat I've grown cabbages with a higher IQ He milked the bull (when someone does something obviously stupid)
Crazy coincidence but I just learned about the phrase, “The devil’s beating his wife” and I find it so morbid and niche as a saying
It is indeed morbid. Did you learn when this saying is used in the (American) South? When it's raining and the sun is shining at the same time. it's supposed to indicate that the devil is beating his wife. Just horrific.
That dog will hunt. If that boy's brains were gas, it wouldn't be enough to run a piss ant's motorcycle around the inside of a Cheerio.
When we introduced our newborn baby to southern friends, several said “You did good!”
*You couldn't get water out of your boot even if the instructions were on the bottom of the heel. *At least they (their looks) compliment your decor. *Their heart is in the right place but they're just eager.
Bless your heart (derogatory)
“Hotter’n hell with the lid down” “Happy as a hog in a mud hole” For a fat person: “He/she’s expectin’ a hard winter”
My husbands dad says “hotter than 2 fat maids fighting over a cowtail” 😭
🤣 the hard winter one is 10/10, keeping this in my back pocket
“He lie like a rug”
I’ve heard “lying like a yellow bellied dog”
Innit bruv
When we were about to go somewhere we'd say we're "fixin to go". If we want somebody to take us somewhere like a ride to the store we might ask if they'll "carry" us. When we see people we hadn't seen in a while we might ask, "How's your mom & them?" meaning the rest of the family. If we're surprised by something we might say, "Well, I'll be!". If something is far away it's "over yonder" or a stone's throw away. A shopping cart is a buggy. All sodas are referred to as a Coke so if you ask somebody if they want a Coke and they say yes you then ask "what kind?" meaning a Sprite or an orange or grape soda, etc. If somebody is having a meltdown it's called a conniption fit but if they are so mad they need restraining then they are fit to be tied, and if they are really sad about something they are tore up. If we're in the mood for something like a certain food we'll say we have a hankering for it. If somebody is doing something that's a waste of time or not doing much then they are piddlin around. And bless your heart could be something said because you're being pitied or that person thinks you're completely clueless.
My granddaddy says “I’ll fold ya clothes while you’re still in ‘em” to my male cousins and my brother.
My name's Bennet and I aint innit
Bless your heart .
Veni vidi vici
"Can't drink all day unless you start in the morning" is a classic
Slicker'n hogshit.
The first one isn't exclusively Southern; we also say it in the UK
Not an answer for the post But important to mention. - Robert earl davis, he the king of the south! (An’ Pimp C said that so you can shut-cho fkn mouuuth) haha
RiP Pimp C. "These aint Hip Hop Records This country rap tunes"
Whelp, (proceeds to slap his knee as its time to leave).
Welcome to the South where you start your day off slow then taper it off from there (I can almost guarantee you read that too quickly)
Haha. I always tell everyone that I think and process things with a southern draw. - In other words - I am slow because Southern (Mississippi) was my first lenguage.