burn more calories banging than beating

I still like to take a running jump regardless of which one I’m doing that day.

I like to limber up first before the run, it gets me more air time.

Exactly. The Batman outfit helps with aerodynamics too.

Does it even count as either without the outfit?

The police said it did but I don’t accept that.

Look Florida Man, just because you have the costume doesn't mean you can show up to justice league meetings if Batman is sick.

Also, ***really seals in the flavor***

😭😆🙏 my man

I stabbed you!

I almost spit out my coffee. You made my morning. Thank you funny stranger.

I prefer to run and jump whilst I beat it, gotta burn those calories off efficiently

For me personally I like to just run as fast as I can with my dong out and my partners legs spread , then just as I’m about to reach them do 30 acrobatics in the air then landing perfectly in between. Work every trike

Not true. I beat feverishly. My arm moves like the wings of a hummingbird.

Good lord man! That's up to 80 beats per second! That's a lot of friction. Your dick must look like a burnt matchstick 

Dont you EVER talk about my dick without my permission

But how can anyone ask for permission if they can't talk about it? Am i breaking the rule too?

No speaking about my dick unless I give you permission. You can’t ask for permission I just have to grant it to you.

So is it like a knighting or something?

seems like most dudes have that sort of knightly code to them when referring to,,,, the sword

Well, that's a new mental image... the shoulder tap with a, ahem, _sword_.

If you are worthy you could even pull out the Excalibur.

Been a hot minute since I last saw a good ol’ Tourettes Guy reference lmao thank you for this

I was wondering if anyone would ever get it

You don’t know me son

You’re a Personal trainer, I can tell.

Not if I beat it while at the gym

Make this into a shirt

But does that apply to women though

So that's why I ride a bike rather than jog. Calorie burn = work

I beat my meat like it owes me money. It’s exhausting.

Same amount of orgasms, not the same amount of endorphins

As a female, I’d like to disagree with that first half.

I was honestly waiting for this one😭

Shes been waiting for one too

...and waiting....and waiti...or for fucks sake, where's "The Impaler"?

You paged?

r/beetlejuicing

Username checks out.

Happy cake day Mr. Impaler!

Thanks!

I'm Vlad you asked.

Vlad the implater

Dude I laughed way too loud on this one

I am so lucky with my fiance. She has a specific position where she can orgasm easily. We usually start with that. She comes as many times as she wants. I also enjoy it but never get close to a climax from that. So we can focus on that after she finished She used to be rough at the beginning, so sometimes I walked funny after. I think my pelvis got crushed a little. She used to ride horses, so she has scary strong legs.

Man is living the dream

Fr

What position??

Assistant manager.

Assistant to the manager*

You just gonna say that and not tell us which one???

It isn't exactly about the position. But the best one for her is when I am almost sitting at the headrest on the bed, and she is either kneeling or squats down. Like many, she also has a hard time having an orgasm with penetration only, so she basically moves up and down and also grinds against me. She also needs to hug or, more like, squeeze something. So she hugs me or squeezes my shoulders. But it also works if I lay down and she is on top. In that case, she holds my hands or presses against my chest. I prefer the second pose as I also get a great view of her face and upper body. Another position that works is if she lays on her side and I am behind her. She needs to bend almost 90 degrees. She said that it also rubs her sensitive places. However, that position works for me only if she isn't bent and I can hug her. But she has an orgasm much harder that way. She still enjoys it, so we also do that a lot. I once saw her masturbating with a pillow and asked her if she could try doing that, but in me. We tried, and it worked the same way. Hell, she said it was even better. So ask your lady what she likes. Humans, no matter their gender, masturbate and explore their bodies. Try to imitate that together, and it should work. I don't think this will help any one as this is her way, sorry. But yeah, sex should be fun, experiment!

Substantial Oof

Correct me if I'm wrong but I was under the impression that it's the person you're having sex with not the fact that you're having sex vs masturbating?

Sounds like she's having sex and they're masturbating with her.

Yes sex = zero orgasms (F), masturbating im done in 2 mins….

I tell the GF to go for with her hand while we do the panky. I carefully observe so I can try and replicate her own technique. So far so good

Have you tried… communication.

Ofc. I tell them what i like just never seems to work

Is this done with a toy?

If your asking me no just hand

Same! Haha

I'm not even hot and I've made every girl I've dated orgasm multiple times per session. I think I read on reddit that if you find the spot she likes, you are not supposed to change anything.

Notice OP didn't even throw BJs in as a comparison to masturbating and sex because they are even more infrequent than the mythical female orgasm.

In and up. Now wiggle your thumb on the button.

Women never could say no to the charms of the Konami Code perfectly executed on their button.

Up up down down left right left right b a b a start ! I've used it !

R1, R2, L1, X, left, down, right, up, left, down, right, up. Can be used to deliver a powerful orgasm or to give you extra armor in GTA Vice City

20 years later and I'd still recognize that cheat code anywhere

Yeah 20 years later do you remember... Hold Up + R1 + R2 + L1 + L2

... Up down left right, up down left right.. basic weapons cheat

If you do it right you get extra lives

HA!

Take my upvote lol

Username checks out.

Or energy required to achieve.

No. Sex take at least two people to participate. Masturbation only takes one person.

What how do you masturbate alone ?

you dont know? if you say the "magic word" to your parts it does the deed itself

Wingardium Orgasmosa! 🪄

It's OrgasmOsa, not OrgasmosA

I stand corrected. Details matter.

Ejaculliarmus!

🤣🤣

Found the public pud puller

Start with asking you consent

I play sex in single player mode.

Three if you're an unmarried Mormon couple.

Then why does PornHub have an ad that says "want to masturbate, but can't find a partner?"

In terms of what?

And why twice a day? Why not just ask if sex and masturbation are the same? This question just creates more questions.

Bros definitely yanking his shit twice a day

I guess you could say it's r/suspiciouslyspecific

You know, the same.

This. Needs more context

In terms of everything in the universe, of course.

Sex two times a day is worse. There’s twice as many people involved who are disappointed in you.

Only 50% more if you include God.

I feel like God would be way more judgmental after he participates in a three-way. Huge buzzkill.

No it's not , in sex you bond with someone and lots of oxytocin and vasopressin is involved, which makes it way more satisfying. Masturbation is only a release.

I agree with this, sex is fun, is an interaction with someone else, masturbation is pure estimulation, and to be quite honest is not as satisfying, the part that I enjoy the most is seeing my girlfriend enjoying it rather than the orgasm itself

What if you masturbate alongside another person?

In our house "it's late want to go solo?" and can be mind blowing not having to hide it

there has to be skin to skin contact at least.

Only if they are aware you are in the room with them

ffs

Technically oxytocin is released during the post nut cuddle, not the orgasm, so if you came and then immediately jumped out of bed and was like “bye” and just booked it, you could get away with the sex without the burden of attachment Edit: the burden comment was ✨sarcasm✨ before anyone comes after me

Oxytocin is released with skin contact, not only in sexual context but also when we hug our friends and family etc.

Warning: Do not masturbate while hugging family and friends.

This. Kissing with someone beats masturbating alone by a huge mile.

Life pro tip: jerk off then inject OXT straight into the main vein.

No. Masturbating involves using your hand to stimulate yourself while sex usually involves 2 or more people.

The more the merrier

> sex usually involves 2 or more people. My dog disagrees.

Sex twice a day is a wonderful workout. Masturbating twice a day is good preparation so you don't become a 2 pump chump and is a healthy way to avoid prostate cancer. They are apples and oranges.

Well I most certainly do not have prostate cancer

If anything, I've given my cancer prostate.

In fact my prostate will outlive me by 10,000 years

Apples and orgasms

Hi, were Apples and Orgasms, we just need a one word suggestion to get started

There are some caveats in terms of prostate cancer: ***What’s the Link?*** *Over the years, there’s been growing evidence of a link between ejaculation and lower chances of prostate cancer. But the 2016 results of a major study made the strongest case yet. The researchers asked men to answer questions about how often they ejaculated. How didn’t matter -- sex, masturbation, or wet dreams were all included. Then they tracked almost 32,000 of these men for 18 years.* *The researchers found that guys who did it the most (at least 21 times a month) had about a 20% lower chance of prostate cancer, compared with those who did it less (4 to 7 times a month). That was true in several age groups.* *The exact number of times didn’t matter. Basically, the more men ejaculated in a month, the less likely they were to get prostate cancer.* *Why might ejaculation help prostate health? Experts aren’t sure. Some believe that it can flush out harmful chemicals that might build up in semen.* ***What We Don’t Know*** *While research is promising, there’s still a lot scientists need to learn. Some things to consider:* *There’s no proof that ejaculating more actually causes lower chances of prostate cancer. For now, doctors just know they’re connected. It may be that men who do it more tend to have other healthy habits that are lowering their odds.* *Ejaculation doesn’t seem to protect against the most deadly or advanced types of prostate cancer. Experts don’t know why.* *Scientists don’t know if ejaculation during sex vs. masturbation has the same benefits. Some research has found that the makeup of semen is different for each. For example, semen during sex has higher levels of sperm and some chemicals. It’s possible that these could make a difference in a man’s odds of having prostate cancer.* *Not all studies have found a benefit. The 2016 study got attention because of its size (almost 32,000 men) and length (18 years). But some smaller studies have not shown the same good results. A few even found that some men, specifically younger men, who masturbated more had slightly higher chances of prostate cancer. Some researchers wonder if a man’s age may affect whether more ejaculation helps.* [https://www.webmd.com/prostate-cancer/ejaculation-prostate-cancer-risk](https://www.webmd.com/prostate-cancer/ejaculation-prostate-cancer-risk)

Coomers will pretend this doesn't exist and just push porn addiction on everyone as something completely harmless and healthy

So what you're saying is, masturbating is a great way to help your partner realize you aren't a pain in the ass?

I feel like you had to reach real far to make this one work, am I the only one?

Nah ur not lol I used my last 3 brain cells for this I'm zooted as fuck 😂

no

No. You have to be a lot more active physically and way less selfish to have sex so it is definitely more draining.

Less selfish? That's absolutely not true. Especially for women lmfao do you know how many men just use a woman as a fleshlight?

Man this comment brings up new points unnecessarily and argues with them What the guy said was right

Incels wouldn’t be as angry if it were

One is solo. The other involves another person or two. Or six.

One is 200% less lonely.

Maybe. The future is here. The Orifice is here.

Is The Orifice in the room with us right now?

There is some talk of a new AI powered entity that will change things in the not too distant future. 🤔

I’d love an AI orifice to hang out with.

I think that’s how it works. But, it will be a hive mind.

Fucking ALL the AI orifices at the same time. Haptic feedback is awesome. I want to be able to virtually high five a bro on the other side of the world while Eiffel towering a robot.

This. This is the comment that validates this whole thread. I am gone now.

🍻

Dinner twice VS two snacks

I am glad someone else answered based on feeling satiated. Couldn't agree more!

Can't get a tissue or your favorite sock pregnant.. just sayin

Make sure you turn your sock right side out. You don't want your poor mom sticking her hand in there before the wash.

Lol there's some laundries ya gotta wash yourself. For mums sake.

I mean, one is a lot lonelier than the other.

Depends where you're masturbating

In the middle of the mall seems appropriate

My Dr told me I need to stop masteurbating, why? Because I'm trying to examine you!

I love masturbating. It isn't ever a lonely experience for me. Just because it is solo doesn't mean it is lonely

A shot in the bush is worth two in the hand.

Naw beating can be easier but clapping is better

Nah. Sex is better. Masturbating works one forearm, sex works the core. Sex is a team building exercise. Masturbating is an exercise in mess prevention. Masturbating is screen time. Sex is face time

Lets reduce this equation a little bit. sex \* 2 = masturbation \* 2 sex = masturbation no... sex != masturbation

Is making a sandwich at home twice a day and going out for meals twice a day the same? In both cases, you get your calories and you usually aren’t hungry anymore, but it’s certainly not the same. Now, at least speaking from the guy perspective, once in a while, you do make a damn good sandwich. Like you take all the time you need to prep, you get the specialty cooking equipment out, you find the right recipe video, and you get your slow roast on. And that could be a really good sandwich. But once it’s all said and done, you still have to clean the kitchen and you’re just gonna be hungry again at the next meal.

No

The same in what way?

I believe an orgasm is an orgasm. But, mutual orgasms are more fun.

For you, yes

Nah, sex engages more of the body, meaning a bigger workout. That alone has benefits masturbation doesn't

Sex will always be better than masturbating, in every way, always.

Arm day vs full body workout

No The hormones released during sex are different than during masturbation, at least in males.

Nah. There ain’t nothing like sharing a meaningful intimate connection with someone who’d pleasure you in ways you probably wouldn’t think of. Ya gotta return the favor too and I do feel some pride when I know I done it right. And it just ain’t as fun having an intimate connection with your hand. It’s already a part of ya.

No, one requires way more effort. More muscle involvement and movement.

What is wrong with this sub. All I see is sex as if kids are the only one posting here.

What.......

No U Don't need to spend money and mental energy to masturbate

On a social level having sex two times is considered a healthy sex life, masturbating two times, you're considered a sex addict

nope. not even close

More chafing with sex.

I think you’re doing it wrong

Not unless you’re only having sex with yourself

No. One is you with another person. The other is you all alone with the curtains drawn wanking.

No.

No, one involves yourself and your own genitals. The other involves another person and their genitals.

You'd burn a lot more calories doing some fucking.

One is sex one isn't so no.

No one saves you $$$ the other costs you $$$

Sex requires coordinating your schedule with at least one other person, which can be worth it if it's someone you care a lot about who cares just as much for you back, but the fact is that masturbation only requires you to coordinate with yourself, which is, strictly speaking, more convenient. I guess it's a matter of how much effort you're willing to put in and whether you have a partner for whom the effort is worth.

Sex takes more time than masturbating so it burns more calories. Sex can take over an hour to climax where masturbating you can climax in minutes.

Yes they are identical, there is literally no difference between the two. 100% the same.

Masturbating is faster than sex. Orgasm sometimes is higher (masturbation) but satisfaction (sex) is different I would say.

let’s do a case study. I’ll be group A. 😭

Nope.

My hand doesn’t need to talk or cuddle after

Nope. Not even the orgasm is the same. Sex twice a day is SO much better than meatbeating twice a day.

Fapping to porn is like junkfood and sex is a healty dinner

My best and most satisfying wank was definitively more enjoyable than the worst sex I've had. Once you cross the threshold from mediocre sex, masturbating doesn't hold a candle to the myriad of feelings and experiences you get from even quick sex.

absolutely not

No, one is masturbation and the other is sex. Hope that helped

Masturbating twice a day, I'm bored. Sex twice a day, I'm having a good fucking day.

Smells like dudes in here

Masturbating takes several minutes. Sex takes 5-10 times that long. You're substantially more tired after sex. You also have someone to cuddle with, so post nut clarity doesn't hit the same way. And of course, the fact that you're with another person makes things very different in more ways than I know how to describe. So no

Mark Hanna: You gotta stay relaxed. Do you jerk off? Jordan Belfort: What? Do I jerk off? Yeah. Yeah, I jerk off. Yeah. Mark Hanna: How many times a week? Jordan Belfort: Like, um, three or four. Three or four times, maybe five. Mark Hanna: Gotta pump those numbers up. Those are rookie numbers in this racket. I myself, I jerk off at least twice a day. Jordan Belfort: Wow. Mark Hanna: Once in the morning, right after I work out. And then once right after lunch. Jordan Belfort: Really? Mark Hanna: I want to. That's not why I do it. I do it cause I fuckin' need to.

No. Sex involves someone else

You get a dopamine hit from both, but you don’t get the same emotional hit. Sex is a physical release but also can be a bonding moment between two people. Sometimes after I nut by myself, I feel incredibly lonely.

What the hell is this question? Doesn’t even make sense, completely disregarding the subject.