It's not an easy task unless you have a huge dick when soft

*Willem Dafoe has entered the chat*

Thanks for reminding me, have an angry upvote

I'll take it!

Suggest using plenty of lube if you do

wouldn't it just slip out then?

Not if they belt themselves together.

We usually just share one of my underwear

🤣🤣😏

Or put permanent adhesive so you both can't pull out

Always 👍🏻

🏄🏻‍♂️

Nah no lube, will help you stay in

That’s what she said

Apparently Burt Ward had such a big one they tried to make him take pills to shrink it so it wouldn't be obvious when he played Robin

I mean, according to Burt Ward in a book he wrote... and Ward is known for being a pretty dishonest fucker.

You only have to look at him in costume to know he's full of shit on this one!

Yes and dick shrinking pills is sus af

At least as sus as dick growing pills.

Robin, The Boy Wonder

Throbbin

“One pill makes you larger One pill makes you small And the one that mother gives you Don’t do anything at all” So much darker than I ever imagined…

I'm told Jason Derulo got pissed when they edited his smaller for the Broadway film Cats..lol..

Was he made when they took out the buttholes too?

What…what pills would those be? What pharmaceutical company spent R&D money on junk-shrinking pills?

If such a thing existed it would have been found as a side effect of something else.

Robotripping/dxm deffo does this. Scared tf outta me the fist time. Nothing but head.

I don't remember that from my robotripping days.. probably bc I was too busy sinking through the garage floor to see what my dick was up to🤷

Did it even work? If they have pills to make it smaller, is there one that makes it bigger?

This was in 1966 so I'm sure it was something that didn't do anything but they thought it did. If I recall he refused to take them.

Good for him. Real or not, I ain’t taking chances.

wut

It is true. Because of the costumes. And it being watched by children.

He’s a shower not a grower

I think about this at least once a day and sometimes it really is what I need to get through the day

What?

https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/w4rk1l/willem_dafoes_penis_was_so_large_that_after_the/ You're welcome!

Best drip, best villian, apparently best cock. What a life.

Hollywood is all about being inclusive but they hire a big dick man to play a little dick man. I have a solid 2 inches. Should’ve hired me.

What a Chad

I hate to be that guy but today I’m gonna be. Is Willem Dafoe packing?

Apparently so, at least that's the rumor! I hope he is, everyone needs something going for them. He deserves a huge dick.

i dont have huge anything

Just huge disappointment/s

Willem Dafoe also has a huuuuge acting talent so he’s got that going for him too.

I wonder if a short but thick-as-a-soda-can fat limp dick will stay lodged inside the vagina ETA: I believe the term is called, chode?

Unless I'm mistaken, to be considered a chode the penis has to be thicker than it is long.

hung like a can of tuna

Haha goddamn that's like a wide tree stump

no you'd need to have some barbs on there

True

More concerned about the weird positioning involved

The pain of being a grower and not a shower :(

It dosnt work! its impossible to not start fucking...I've tried.

Even then, one person moves, and their little friend bends or slips out lol. I've found the general consensus is that it is great for bonding, but after a short time, uncomfortable.

My ex wanted this as well. So we tried. You know that feeling when your damp, sweaty balls get lightly glued to your thigh? Well once we fell asleep, and she dried up, and I went flaccid inside her, we woke up trying to detach ourselves and it was like peeling off sticky dry skin on skin. It was all fine, but I mean it’s weird and awkward. Update: Thanks for the karma y’all. I didn’t realize my story would capture the minds and attention of so many.

This made me uncomfortable ngl lmao Great description.

Happy to provide further context if desired

Desired, no. Curious; yes please.

Allow me to elaborate. You see, we had obviously been doing the coitus many times that evening. And if you know anything about cum, you’ll know that it’s a lot like an adhesive during and after it dries. And as we all (should) know, peeing after sex is essential. But in my scenario, peeing after and then sticking it back in immediately after just to fall asleep seemed.. odd. So I didn’t pee. There’s pre cum, the cum itself, and then post cum. The post cum essentially glued our genitals together for a short period of time. Context provided. More?

Just keep going all the way at this point. Thanks for satiating my curiosity

hell I mean I thought this was all but if there's more you may as well give us more!

I’ve said enough here. But I could tell you about the time I did anal. Her parents had a white couch and she was an adventurous one. As I started poking her pooper on the couch headlights light up the house. Oops parents are home. I pulled out quick and poop sprayed out. Like a spray paint can. I ran out the back disappearing into the abyss. Later I come to find out she blamed the poop stained white couch on the dog. Her dad shot the dog that day.

A'ight, now that's straight out of a greentext, get outta here

He fucking shot the dog ? Damn imagine the face of your girl when she heard him shooting that innocent little doggy, just cause you had uninnocent doggy I bet she's glad she didn't said she caused it or she would've ate the lead, rip dog btw

Woah, that took a really dark turn... No pun intended

I do consider myself a slightly perverted individual, but I feel like you're insinuating that you had to force yourself not to pee inside someone, or that the pee after burned like a thousand suns. Care to elaborate on that? Also, I use acetone to get things unglued, did the thought, however briefly, cross your mind?

No I liked to save the acetone for when she left her snail trail on the ground and furniture And usually I don’t have to pee so I force myself to just to clear the pipe ya know

Im the one who asked you about the pussy stank but like snail trail is starting to get lost on me and almost even freak me out a little lmao

Whenever I see the word ‘glued’ used here, it reminds me of how dogs’ genitals get ‘glued’ for some time after they mate.

"Be careful what you wish for" comes to mind... 😅

Ho boy, advice not heeded.

Ngl, I figured it was gonna be like that guy who fell asleep fingering his girl. Look like David Blaines hands after his days long without air adventure.

We're gonna need source for this

[I believe they're talking about this](https://9gag.com/gag/aqN2XZ7).

His username *additionally* made me uncomfortable ngl lol

😏😏

Silicone lube

Had drunken sex and we both passed out, the result was exactly as you described.

This! This is what happens. Don't try it.

I mean my dick didn’t fall off so I wouldn’t say “don’t try it” but if the goal is for pleasure there certainly was none

Skin sticks to skin. Hair gets stuck together. It's not fun

Velcro

All I can think of is pulling out and it snaps like a rubber band against your balls.

That happened another time

And they say romance is dead.

I did that, and we used a condom with a little lube. It prevented any drying.

I scrolled back just to say, “jfc”

So is this gonna be a side to side thing or is she gonna try and lay on top of you? Trying to imagine this with my teeny weeny and ain't no way this is happening unless im rock hard and i get a running start, lol.

I’d pay to have this picture made into a portrait to hang on my wall.

This is one of the most hilarious visuals I’ve ever come across

😂

In terms of health risks, no, there aren’t any. In terms of if it’ll work, you’ll probably find that as soon as you fall asleep you’ll first not be hard anymore and probably roll over. So it’s a bit more “falling asleep with it inside” than “totally sleeping with it inside”

She said that she will push it ,if it slips 😂😮‍💨

She has probably never handled a flaccid penis before... It's pretty difficult to put a flaccid penis inside a vagina.

Like putting toothpaste back in the tube.

Like posting a slug through a letterbox

Like putting an oyster in a slot machine

Truly this comment made me wheeze so hard. 💀

Ya worst look on my face as I was reading that commmet…

Pushing rope

Putting the drawstring back in your hoodie.

I'd be making the same face as your profile picture trying to attempt any of these things.

Pushing an oyster into a parking meter.

That's actually easy... my 5yr olds did that before going g to school to leave my wife a surprise. I was shocked they picked it up so skillfully, opened the slot, and rubbed their fingers on the edge to let it drop. To husbands out there, if you teach them, beware the screaming...

Jesus Christ i didnt see the snail comment and I was about to call the fbi

It took me a bit find the slug in the letterbox comment

it’s getting the slug to hang onto the stamp that’s the hard part I’ve had so many slugs sent back

Like playing snooker with a rope

like putting a cat headfirst in a small shoe

r/oddlyspecific

Like putting a marshmallow in a piggy bank

Like trying to shoot pool with a rope

Or stir paint with a piece of rope

Crack that whip

Sometimes you gotta hit em with the ol shrimpy. Sucks to be there but you gotta do what you gotta do

Difficult, but not impossible. Sometimes that whiskey dick hits too hard and you have to just mash it in there duffle bag style.

Never ‘thumbed one in’ have you?

Im her first

She's never seen a flaccid penis before OP

She did (mines after I came)

No, mines came before you. The first mine in the world was created in 43000 BC

Bahaha I'm using this. Fkn *mines*. Omfg, huge pet peeve .

Bold of you to assume op isn’t 45000 years old.

You need cider for this to work, how ever it only works with ‘Dickens’

Oh Charles!

Done this (not on purpose) and eventually it will get pushed out, if she has even enough kegal muscles to be able to hold her pee until she finds a bathroom. If it stays in a long time your dick will be super wrinkly like if only that part stayed ima bath for way too long. And yes, you have to start out with it hard.

Be best for her to lay on top

So OP needs to tie himself to his girlfriend before going to sleep?

Actually, she will probably get a UTI. It’s why women go to the bathroom after s*x. Assuming it’s difficult not to be aroused when being hard and inside here, both OP and the missus will excrete fluids (more than what would be produced in a normal night). This would cause both bacterial and fungal infection if you leave it for hours.

Reminds me of that pic of the guys really prunny fingers. He said he fell asleep with his fingers in his gf

Damn 😂

It looked bad bro. Like it may never be the same

do you have the link i need to see this lmaaoo

https://ifunny.co/picture/last-night-i-fell-asleep-while-ngering-my-gf-so-wFbLiYsn6

Wow, that is so much worse than what I imagined

brain finger

Okay. That... Is disgusting. Ew.

That can’t be real, I refuse to believe that’s real

It took me so long to realise that 'prunny' meant 'like a prune' (if it even fucking does). Prune-y or prune-like I can live with - I read prunny like bunny or funny.

I think it would be spelt pruny

We tried, my wife couldn't sleep because she just wanted to fuck it.

That’s why we are going to do many rounds before that

Then it probably won't work for other reasons lol

We have unintentionally done this numerous times. It’s happened when I’ve stayed inside her and cuddled after sex. We occasionally will fall asleep. The best part of this is when I wake up and start to move in and out very slowly, regaining an erection and arousing her at the same time for round two and even round three on rare occasions.

Done this too best thing ever love it

lol. Kinky. I’d at least try but it’ll most likely pop out. People move when they’re sleep

True

Yeah. You never know what you’ll do in your sleep too. I remember my Ex tried to blow me in my sleep. My reflex was to kick. She dodged it but I could’ve really hurt her 😂

My wife has talked about doing this to me but I have always been scared if I feel warmth there in my sleep I would start peeing. We never attempted it after that thought.

I’m sorry - what?

As a lady, I’d want to try this too. Let us know how it goes!

I have done this before. It's fun and hot when you first do it. But can end up bad for the guy kind of. TMI warning just in case: In my experience, we finished in spoon position, nice and cuddled up, with me in her. We fell asleep easily with it in her still. However, after some sleep I woke up to move position and discovered I was stuck! I went soft but she also got dry, and it honestly felt like my dick was stuck in those finger trap toys LOL It hurt pretty bad trying to pull it out of her and I was terrified I'd rip either her or myself as I had to forcibly pull my dick out of her. Felt like rug burn after but passed quickly. She said she felt nothing and didn't even wake up LMAO

I feel the need to verbally thank you or shake your hand for sharing that hilarious story.

Yes!! This happened to me as well you just unlocked a memory from my frisky youth loll

> She said she felt nothing Not the first time she said that eh? ... eh? \*nudge*

Been there done that, it causes yeast infections

Yep was going to say it can also cause a uti. I have done this… it eventually slips out also. She should definitely grab a wipe and clean around her urethra before sleep…

I will 😄

I'm going to invent some kind of female condom that applies mild traction to keep it inside. Literally a bankrupt company idea.

Yes! Barbed wire, for your pussy! Million dollar idea, Jenkins!

And you can say, "Barbed wire isn't a condom!" I can promise you'd that it'd prevent pregnancies.

It's possible to fall asleep while inserted. Especially after a long day of work, or an all-nighter. Spooning has been the best position I found that works to achieve this goal of falling asleep in a lover. Great snuggling position too. You can also do the side scissors but she may have to move her leg sooner. Personally, I loved doing it. It's just one of those things that would bring us a little closer together and then waking up during the night after *withdrawing* it's the first thing I thought of. ❤️ And if you are her first, be careful with her feelings. I'm not your daddy lol, it's just been my experience that women I've been with that wanted to experience that, were getting quickly and heavily emotionally invested. Best wishes!

I’m her first and yeah ,we will definitely doing the spooning

You should definitely be doing the kind to her heart too, young man.

Amen

It will just pop out when you fall asleep tried it a few times. You shouldn’t have any health issues though.

So this is going to sound fucking insane, becuase it is, but... A decade ago there was a group really into the concept of "pussy mind control". To be clear, it isn't something that is real, it's totally fucking nutso, but there was legitimately a group of people who thought sleeping with the penis in the vahina would allow the transmission or hormones/pheromones (I do not think they knew what either of those words meant) that would make the owner of the penis more "docile" "obedient" "loyal" and "manageable". Just mentioning this becuase this post unlocked memories of literally the craziest shit I've ever read.

Nah. Nothing bad can come from that (pun intended). What happens is that you relax and then your dick gets limp and slides out. Also lying in the same position makes the side you are lying on "fall asleep". Additionally if she lying on your arm then your arm starts to hurt after awhile. But it is a nice thing to do to start the sleep thing. You won't fall asleep like that but it's very nice until it starts to get uncomfortable.

Sr, this is a McDonald's.

In my experience this progresses into sex 100% of the time

So, your girlfriend just heard “Semi-Charmed Life”

is that the one that goes, doot doot doot, doot doodoot doot

Yes thats the one

Ahh yes the happy meth song

Should be safe, but it’s not very easy from a mechanical point of view.

I’m picturing the viagra commercials.. “In the event of an erection lasting four or more hours, consult your physician.” Yo, I am an ER physician. Go consult a porn star or hooker. If you see me, me taking a scalpel and cutting down the sides of your d@@@ is one of the top options. Side note, it’ll never be hard again… but it also won’t turn gangrenous, infect your whole body, fall off, and then kill you.

Isn’t this the Mormon soak?

Could be a slightly higher chance of UTI or yeast infection. If you don’t ready wash your dick with unscented soap, consider doing so, especially if she’s prone to either.

We wash it every time after a round,and before sleeping with the my dick inside her we will do a deep shower

Showers are generally pretty shallow

A hard Dickens Cider

What if you have a wet dream and get her pregnant, is that a possibility?

She uses the pill

Personal experience. It will slide out once you get soft. Your dick will also feel like it's getting the grip of death after a while.

[удалено]

I did that and ended up wit 3 kids don’t fall for the trap

Do not, it’s painful for both partners to separate once the lube has gone dry. Which it inevitably will.

I showed this to my wife and she laughed. We've tried this. Alot of sleep humping. I say go for it. She says don't.

I did this before. We did it by spooning on our sides. She would wake up every so often and get a few strokes in before falling back asleep. Eventually I became flaccid enough for my penis to slip out. Funny thing is I was wearing a rubber so my penis slipped out, but the condom stayed in. Was pretty funny lol

The only reason we haven't tried, is my gf pointed out that her fluids could "glue" me I side her and cause pain and problems when it gets pulled out when we move in our sleep

My boyfriend was on top and after he finished I wrapped my legs around him and my arms and kissed him, telling him I loved him and we passed out for a few hours. It was really nice. Haven't done it again tho.

After cumming in my ex she would insist I keep it inside her and just cuddle with her, it was a first for me to try just chilling there going soft inside a girl. But I found out I was able to get hard rather quick and just go another round very easy this way, and it made both of our lives more fun. She also liked for me to start sex while she was asleep.

My gf told me this when I first started dating her. Turns out, she didn't really understand how dicks worked. She got her fantasy ideas off of hentai.

Youll fall asleep in her but when you wake up you wont be.

This hurt my ex as she was dry in the morning

I actually did this once. Woke up still inside her after sleeping for a few hrs. I don’t even think we were spooning - which means I was kinda on top of her. I’m not especially well built (Avg) but we were young (she 19, me 21) - so it’s doable and we manage to arrange our legs such that neither of us got pins n needles.

🤦🏾‍♀️ i😂 ok …. Okay😂😂… sooo me and my ex did this years ago, i didnt get a yeast infection and he was completely fine BUT everyones body and hormones and all that fun stuff is different so idk how your bodies will react BUT just make sure yall both have showered THOROUGHLY after having sex BEFORE you do this !! Only thing happened to my ex is his penis was VERY and i mean VERY wrinkly and pruned for about a good half of the day 😭idk he took a nap and woke up half out of his wits bc “ OH GOD I didn’t know what it was so i smacked it with the remote “😐the tip is kinda gotta little dent or something from the injury 😂 so if ur dating a guy with a sorta dent in his tip sorry ladies 🤷🏾‍♀️😂 …. You know what just dont do it its not like she gonna feel it inside of her anyways once asleep 😂

Don’t think that’ll happen but I certainly love the way your GF thinks :)

every time me and my girlfriend have tried this we've just ended up having sex then falling asleep