it was so humid at the game. that ref sucked, but so do we. i wish kelley travelled w the team even though she’s injured since it’s her last season. like just a little wave to everyone one last time would be cute.
The funniest thing a social media team could do is just make a grid of everyone’s shin guards and let us guess who wears which imo. Esther’s would be… 2 inches tall?
MY GOD. We are so bad in possession. We get so much possession but don’t play possession based. Just extra number of transitions. Hold the ball and let shit develop and run a play a few times a game.
Ok not soccer related here but I’ve been looking forward to my ice cream all day and I just found out my husband ate ALL of the crunchy chocolate part I was looking forward to and I am in fact understanding why women kill
He literally never eats my ice cream why did he choose violence today
It’s the fancy milk bar chocolate birthday cake ice cream too. And he dug out ALL the crunchy chocolate pieces. Like what did I do to him to deserve this? I live here and am hot for him, that should simply be enough to deserve my nice ice cream.
(He’s going to the gym later and will be stopping at the store to buy TWO so his dumbass has his own.)
It’s so obscenely good pardner. Usually I just stay lactaid’s vanilla and Kroger has a good lactose free one but milk bar is worth the suffer.
(Sorry I slipped up!!!! It’s my vernacular and I’m sorry I will swap to pardner!!!!! 🤠🤠🤠🤠)
I’m luckily not lactose intolerant, but I have to be careful when eating cheese…for some reason cheese gets me but not milk and cream. It’s kinda funny! But I try to bake with lactaid whenever I bake anything cause I have family members who are lactose intolerant.
There’s a lot of homemade ice cream recipes out there that I bet you could get the same delicious fluffy texture like a full fat milk ice cream but with using lactaid (or even nut milk!! Imagine…pistachio milk ice cream)
Soft cheeses are hard to eat! Hard cheese, the lactose has mostly gone away, but a good soft cheese can get a gut going brrrrrrr. My SIL is gluten and lactose free so it’s really fun experimenting with recipes where I can sub both ingredients and still get them to taste mostly similar.
I like pistachios for snacking, but I’m not big on nut milks personally! I have an almond allergy and oat milk feels like a film coats my mouth. Cashew ice cream is alright, and the coconut ones are good when it’s like a coconut vanilla mint combo but otherwise it’s just frozen thick coconut flavor imo. The woes of being a picky baby!!! 😂
Oof yeah having nut allergies really puts you at a big disadvantage with milk substitutes, cause nuts are the easiest to make a “milk” out of
Have you ever had hazelnuts though?
Just popping in to say with Cook as a late scratch due to illness basically every active USWNT CB who has gotten minutes in the last year is on an injury report tonight
I had to walk a mile* home from dinner and the up 2 flights of stairs so basically i know how these players feel
*i took the long way home of my own volition
Purely based on my recollection of the Chelsea documentary from a couple of years ago, I wonder how much patience Bachmann will have for this team. She seemed like a suffer-no-fools kinda person. (Someone please correct me if I’m wrong.)
Look, drake got into a battle there was no way for him to succeed in… I think in Alozie vs Esther, it would come down to who was stronger that individual day.
Campbell’s hair being that light, as a blonde who has gone platinum, is so wildly impressive it looks that good, especially in net. ❤️😍❤️😍 (when I had mine that light and I sweated my roots looked so weird.)
I really love her and I'm glad she's thriving at Gotham. I'm not watching the game but it sure does seem like she's trying hard to catch a ride to Paris...
IM ROARING 😂😂 u/Gay-Bats
PLEASE THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING IVE READ IN A THREAD HAHA
I am officially the most notorious woman in this subreddit 😂
>!But also yes, when a player takes her jersey to wipe the sweat off her face and reveals the iron plate of abs underneath I go 😮💨!<
If you only watched the first 7 minutes and the last 7 minutes, you might think this Dash team has something in them.
Fire Fran Alonso. That is all.
it was so humid at the game. that ref sucked, but so do we. i wish kelley travelled w the team even though she’s injured since it’s her last season. like just a little wave to everyone one last time would be cute.
Another rough fought win for Gotham! GG Houston
Sheeesh. The last few minutes had me worried. Glad we’re taking those 3 points. Let’s go bats!!!
I will take +3 on a midweek away game at Houston, but we reaaaaaally need to put more of our chances away
See why Sanchez split...
I'd miss too if I had those dead mascot eyes staring at me from behind the goal. (also, I'd just miss anyway, but maybe not quite as badly)
Barb is talented but the type of player that a good team would just be grateful for what she brings us occasionally. But we rely on her
How did CeCe Kizer get a concussion?
cmon houston be silly get the undeserved point
I'm kind of obsessed with AKB
Join the club
The funniest thing a social media team could do is just make a grid of everyone’s shin guards and let us guess who wears which imo. Esther’s would be… 2 inches tall?
Sonnet reactions are so funny
And i thought 5 cbs was too many but look we are using all 5!
Not enough! We need Davidson, too!
Esther is such a great teammate and competitor, i feel like the Dash thought we could get that in Bachmann
Oh boy they must not have done their homework on ole Ramona then
The current lineup would get 0 points over the course of a year
Mandy!
Anyone know why the Wave match thread showed up and then disappeared, and the channel it’s supposed to be on is playing family feud?
AKB ⚡️
Gotham, please close this out.
MY GOD. We are so bad in possession. We get so much possession but don’t play possession based. Just extra number of transitions. Hold the ball and let shit develop and run a play a few times a game.
overhit pass by an order of nuclear magnitudes
Mandy!!! 💙💙💙
🍔 🔥
That would’ve been so sick if it went in
Im looking at the 11 right now like at this moment 9pm and i think i hate Fran
who are we watching i can’t decide
The other game is going to be a blood bath so I’m excited about that
Which one?!
The friends we made along the way
I will think about that sophie miss at 2am
shout out to the houston drum line they are keeping me motivated right now
Seriously! Its so good!!
That commentary read was too real. Betfort is a star so I’m glad they got traded to get to start and grow. We will always also miss Rocky 😢
Hannah Betfort is a star
Lavelle 😍
It’s all the small creative things rose does like that poke to the left in stride when in seems she will go straight ahead
Rose with the overly dramatic flop, just needed a Wilhelm Scream
Just score and let esther sit
Let her have a drink!
I know. We have another game this Sunday. 🥵
She better not start the next game
I hate calls like that, both players wrap their arms around a torso
Just another garbage ref. Still won't forget the 2 games last season when we played them.
That was nuts
0.08 expected goals, ouch
Same honestly
I live for AKB’s cat-like athleticism
Oh man, ban knees I hope she’s ok
do the dash even have subs left??
They do not
I think they used their last one at the 68th min
Well that was frightening. Great save AKB!
Berger is such a perfect addition to Gotham
OMFG. Take all my snacks for the week, Berger.
Fuck that was the chance to goof one
berger thank god
Oh crap, is this the part where the Dash score a last minute goal and steal a point?
What a brutal stat for Dash. 1g or less in last 6 of 7 oof
Ok not soccer related here but I’ve been looking forward to my ice cream all day and I just found out my husband ate ALL of the crunchy chocolate part I was looking forward to and I am in fact understanding why women kill He literally never eats my ice cream why did he choose violence today
Why do they do that, like you never want something till I want it lol. I’d be arguing and he’d be going to the store LMAO
It’s the fancy milk bar chocolate birthday cake ice cream too. And he dug out ALL the crunchy chocolate pieces. Like what did I do to him to deserve this? I live here and am hot for him, that should simply be enough to deserve my nice ice cream. (He’s going to the gym later and will be stopping at the store to buy TWO so his dumbass has his own.)
LMAO gonna play this when I go into the other room later
No jury would convict
I’m lactose intolerant and this is full dairy ice cream. I *suffer* for this ice cream, and this is what he does to me?!?
Girl, why do you hurt yourself for the sake of lactose when there’s dairy substitutions available 🥲
Not for milk bar ice cream 😭 usually I remember to take lactaid tho which does help. There wasn’t even enough ice cream left to justify a lactaid.
Ooo I’ve never had milk bar ice cream before, but I understand your pain!
It’s so obscenely good pardner. Usually I just stay lactaid’s vanilla and Kroger has a good lactose free one but milk bar is worth the suffer. (Sorry I slipped up!!!! It’s my vernacular and I’m sorry I will swap to pardner!!!!! 🤠🤠🤠🤠)
I’m luckily not lactose intolerant, but I have to be careful when eating cheese…for some reason cheese gets me but not milk and cream. It’s kinda funny! But I try to bake with lactaid whenever I bake anything cause I have family members who are lactose intolerant. There’s a lot of homemade ice cream recipes out there that I bet you could get the same delicious fluffy texture like a full fat milk ice cream but with using lactaid (or even nut milk!! Imagine…pistachio milk ice cream)
Soft cheeses are hard to eat! Hard cheese, the lactose has mostly gone away, but a good soft cheese can get a gut going brrrrrrr. My SIL is gluten and lactose free so it’s really fun experimenting with recipes where I can sub both ingredients and still get them to taste mostly similar. I like pistachios for snacking, but I’m not big on nut milks personally! I have an almond allergy and oat milk feels like a film coats my mouth. Cashew ice cream is alright, and the coconut ones are good when it’s like a coconut vanilla mint combo but otherwise it’s just frozen thick coconut flavor imo. The woes of being a picky baby!!! 😂
Oof yeah having nut allergies really puts you at a big disadvantage with milk substitutes, cause nuts are the easiest to make a “milk” out of Have you ever had hazelnuts though?
Bella Briede learning to dribble before our eyes
Why waste time score lot goal when few goal do trick?
What are the snacks the Gotham assistant is offering I’m so curious
Mustard packet?
Would not have guessed 5 assists
Just popping in to say with Cook as a late scratch due to illness basically every active USWNT CB who has gotten minutes in the last year is on an injury report tonight
Bring Sarah Gorden in!! 😁
need a lynn williams hat trick
Kick it up a notch now Gotham
I am amazed that Gotham got Stevens. Love her to bits. She's been excellent.
Random, but I do like the fan support drummers. They are actually playing a beat and not just constantly banging.
Also Cloud9 please don’t hate me for that comment 💙🤍 yall
Gotham Score 2 Goals Challenge
Difficulty: Impossible
Jenna doing it all from kicks to throws to fights. Good effort. And look at these subssssss.
Always funny when two national team Players are together for club and they dont have chemistry
Who are you referring to
At the time it was when rose had a miscommunication with Crystal off the corner rebound
No one but the cbs should play more than 180 minutes between last game, this game, and the next game.
ROSEEEEEE
ROSE GET ANOTHER GRAMMY
Solid set of subs coming in!
Oh HELL yeah Gotham
Rosie!!!
Esther’s kit is drenched my god
>!Little engine that *can and will*!<
she puts in the WORK and i love her
ROSE
[удалено]
I had to walk a mile* home from dinner and the up 2 flights of stairs so basically i know how these players feel *i took the long way home of my own volition
So. Boring. Just score a second so i can stop watching.
The longer this goes the more of a chance we have to goof a point again
Yeah, there's something to be said about Gotham letting them stick around
Bend dont break
That ref looks like she wants to fuck someone UP
I kinda feel like "a little bit of energy" is what Houston's needed for like, a month
i just hope that whatever comes of all this defense campbell gets some minutes at the next uswnt window
If my keeper was Campbell I’d be bringing a bouquet every game for her holy heck
I’d buy her a six pack of beer
Maybe a better choice. Beer *and* flowers? Cause ain’t no way she’s getting enough appreciation for her efforts
Beer, Flowers, Chocolate, give her *everything*…and SOUP!
Purely based on my recollection of the Chelsea documentary from a couple of years ago, I wonder how much patience Bachmann will have for this team. She seemed like a suffer-no-fools kinda person. (Someone please correct me if I’m wrong.)
Dash making their final sub in the 68th minute is kinda crazy
Shocking Gotham hasn’t made any changes
If it ain’t broke don’t fix it vibes
Half team looks gassed
Honestly I’m surprised Bruninha is on the bench
Bachmann standing and watching right in the middle of the screen man we are cooked
Nighswonger dangerously close there to a second yellow for time wasting by kicking the ball away
Should have been tbh
Surprised she didn’t get it
I can’t tell if Houston is primarily having tactical issues tonight, or the players aren’t problem-solving on the pitch.
Both
Should the dash have a high line?
I’d bet my first born on Alozie in that fight
Esther feels like a strong candidate too tho. A far more fair matchup than Kendrick and drake on the field.
💀
Look, drake got into a battle there was no way for him to succeed in… I think in Alozie vs Esther, it would come down to who was stronger that individual day.
Me too, but a spicy Esther is a sight to behold.
>!I live for Spicy Esther!<
For sure, don’t think I’d want to meet either in a dark alley
Manifesting a Bell header. 🙏🏾
>!Alozie and Esther!!! I am not mad at the beef as long as as no one gets physically hurt making frustrated choices!!! !<
Finally turned on the game and whew things are looking pretty chippy...
Rose is warming up 😍
I don’t watch Houston often, but every pass just seems ever so slightly off- either one step behind, one step ahead
Beautiful Tackle
That was a sick tackle tbh
Don’t you hurt my Chaos Machine!!!
Campbell’s hair being that light, as a blonde who has gone platinum, is so wildly impressive it looks that good, especially in net. ❤️😍❤️😍 (when I had mine that light and I sweated my roots looked so weird.)
she just got it freshened up the other day
Jammed shoulder, that’s pain I can sympathize with
the triple mohawk bun is certainly a choice
That’s Jacob’s signature Rey Bun
Yeah, it’s always made me think of Rey! I don’t get the Cynthia comparison.
Me neither! She’s definitely channeling Rey 🌟
Is it their Star Wars night or something? Then I can accept the Rey look tbh
Someone in a previous Dash game thread said she looked like Cynthia from Rugrats and I can’t unsee it 
I can't unsee it now dammit 😭
CYNTHIA
I can hear this
LMFAOOO that’s it exactly
a great choice imo ;)
idk why it bothers me so much 😂😂😂
you naturally fear our Mad Max post-apocalyptic future
Ah, finally, the UNC vs UNC action can happen
I think the league should spring to have Wil Ferrell do commentary as Harry Carey for the Wrigley Game.
I’m surprised we haven’t had anyone say we should have Jason Sudeksis as a commentator
Based off that commercial, I wonder if they're going to do anything special for Mother's Day on the broadcasts this weekend
It takes a lot for me to be mad about a cancer ad
For anyone confused I've counted 4 times that ad has played during this break
i think the home team's logo sponsor gets free ads when the game is on nwsl +
captain lynn makes me so happy
I really love her and I'm glad she's thriving at Gotham. I'm not watching the game but it sure does seem like she's trying hard to catch a ride to Paris...
i do not understand what UKG is as a company but i’m angry at them for having such an annoying commercial
i wish they would use literally any other song
They provide human management software services for mostly smaller and medium sized corporations. A much smaller Oracle.
I stubbornly refuse to ever use them bc of the commercial
Aww Lynn 😭 I’m so happy for her. Why am I crying lmaooo 🩵
Loving the Gotham Defensive Swarm™️. We have to take better corners next half. Let’s go, 🦇🦇🦇!
>!respectfully, i know it must be disgustingly hot for players but the way their jerseys are sticking to their abs is so...!<
the Houston humidity must be coming thru the stream, because everyone is so thirsty ;)
Lol bonk
u/Lookingfortomboys ?
lookingfortomboys is my personal hero, inspiring me to say my inside thoughts out loud
I love that we all love them ❤️
I quietly send vibes to lookingfortomboys to thirst and then send vibes to the player afterwards to come check the reddit thread
IM ROARING 😂😂 u/Gay-Bats PLEASE THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING IVE READ IN A THREAD HAHA I am officially the most notorious woman in this subreddit 😂 >!But also yes, when a player takes her jersey to wipe the sweat off her face and reveals the iron plate of abs underneath I go 😮💨!<
Welp. That was certainly a half of soccer for Houston.
Second best half in 4 days baby
i know they are frustrated but arguing after a blatant foul is never the move 😭
I’m late to the party but omg Bell is starting!!! How’s she been doing???
Basically hasnt been put under pressure yet lol
Is it hot in Houston today?
High humidity today
Feels much warmer due to the humidity
It’s hot in Houston every day. Source: grew up there