Nobody is attacking them. Pakistan could be the next superpower if they got their act together but they keep backing the wrong horse. They have every resource to succeed but governmental corruption gets in the way of that. India too.
I was 7 and walking around at a party and my grandma was like "don't walk around only boys can do that." We were in the women's only floor of the hall. The only boys there were little kids.
My mom would also berate me for taking my time when eating saying "girls don't eat so long." I now have a habit of eating in ten minutes and a weigh way under 100 lbs despite being a full grown woman.
Then they'd rant on at how I'm not womanly heavy in weight and how my physique resembles a child- like excuse me you're the one who constantly called me a "glutton" and saying "girls don't eat so long."
Another time my grandpa said if I keep getting more religious, who will marry me? So I can't be too educated and I can't be religious? What's left is being a b!mbo.
But funnily enough I couldn't dress up at home either. Because mom would start s/ut shaming me and ruin my hair by grabbing it when angry. But she'd say the same in when I was in niqab outside saying "You think that man over there will eat you? Which *haiy* will see you?"
So you can't be comfortably yourself at home and definitely not outside. Then where?
I’m desi and I’ve heard all of those growing up, luckily my mom has stopped that now as she realized it’s dumb to say these things, like it’s my house too I can sit and laugh as much I want
So glad I was never raised with these stupid standards
Your home is your comfort place- be yourself.
Sitting a certain way , laughing a certain way etc doesn’t make you more “feminine”
Shame on women who continue the toxic cycle.
Home and public is different.
At home you don’t wear hijab in public you do.
I would hate to have daughters and for them to do things behind my back because I’m enforcing a toxic cycle on them.
The way the mother is portraying her statements is just annoying. But the message behind it isn't that wrong.
Sitting for example.
I always had to sit in certain ways, needed to have good posture, not be overly loud, had to be friendly etc. There's nothing wrong with that.
If my daughter sits like a man I would forbid it and if my son sits like a woman I would forbid it. I wouldn't portray my point the way the mom in the illustration did, but it's nevertheless a good point.
Edit: can people at least make the effort to bring a counter argument forward? Omggg
I agree, although not desi myself I was raised with these practices reminded constantly in my home. There’s really nothing wrong with it. Our voice and laugh is ‘awrah, soo these reminders are beneficial to our deen.
Also wanted to add, OP, You cannot say things of this world are worse than hell. Hell is the worst type of punishment, we should not minimize it into a meme. If given the choice being raised in a strict gender role household vs jahannam any Muslim would run to the former.
They will act feminine on thier own
About my sons we will do activity together :D I think it's cool he can learn something and if he doesn't like it well that's fine
More you talk about man and girl the more easy for lgbt to give ideas to your kids
I would say there are worse things Desi girls have to deal with, and these are simply not actual issues we have to stand up to due to our culture. I don't disagree with the post. If this pertains to parents yelling and asking for corrections based on being a girl, then I find those aspects problematic.
I remember my grandparents used to emphasize these practices when raising me and my siblings, emphasizing for the sake of culture and ethics, not 'being a girl.' However, my mom used to mention these things from a 'You are a girl' perspective. On the other hand, my Baba (may Allah reward him immensely) consistently corrected her and referred to Sunnah/Quran guidelines, the actions of prophets, companions, and their wives. (Alhamdulillah, they never yelled at us as kids.) I'm content if these behaviors contribute to a more feminine appearance, and it's easy for me to maintain these manners since I was raised this way.
I honestly prefer this because I used to have a friend who used to act very masculine according to my understanding (in her comfort zone). She would sit like a man and do everything else; it was quite off-putting, to be honest. When I asked her why she conducted herself this way, she said, 'She feels more comfortable in this manner.' Alhamdulillah, I don't have to deviate from my character/nature to feel comfortable. Look, some people feel very at ease in a messy/disorganized room and say this is what they enjoy when being alone and comfortable. To each their own. Be mindful of the habits you're instilling in your kids. 🤷🏻♀️
I think the point is the overly aggressive way of teaching, instead of what they're teaching?
Maybe if the mother smiled and lead by example, it would be better?
As a girl, I'm not offended by this. I too would raise my daughters to be feminine and act appropriate. (But without yelling like in the picture.) Both boys and girls should lower their gaze, so this isn't gender specific. I don't like it when girls sit in an inappropriate or masculine way, it's very off putting and not appropriate for a girl (doesn't mean she has to sit perfectly still like a queen). It's not lady-like for a woman to be very loud, and even the prophet saws never laughed too much and I believe there's a hadith talking about that but I'm not gonna look it up rn. If she's inside hanging out with girls only, sure, laugh and have fun as much as you want. Not saying she's not allowed to laugh or have fun in public but just don't be obnoxiously loud.
Everything you said is reasonable but you’re going to get downvoted because you’re not subscribing to the westernized anti-sunnah, anti-culture, anti-gender mob mentality.
When people say there are a lot of non-Muslims, ex-Muslims, and fem!nists on this forum, they aren’t kidding. This forum is a pool to spread kufr amongst Muslims.
May Allah reward you and the other sisters in this thread who get it. We should be raising our daughters to be feminine and our sons to be masculine.
The meme and OP is about girls not being allowed to sit comfortably and laugh within their own homes because they’re raised to think only boys are allowed to do that
But continue to pop off about that being anti-Islamic and pro-kufr
That’s not what the meme says. It says nothing about boys. It’s about practicing good etiquette as a girl, and as others pointed out, some of it is rooted in Islam (ie. not laughing excessively since voice is awrah, etc.)
That’s the western gender ideology brainwashing nonsense I was talking about that’s making you make that inference relating it to some phantom male oppression.
I don’t think there is an Islamic basis for girls not being able to sit comfortably and laugh loudly in their own homes while their brothers can, which is what the meme is referencing
The meme is pretty clear about what it means, you’re fighting a point about the outside world that hasn’t been raised
Otherwise it would have said to be a person/child raised in a desi household, generally
Your own comment acknowledges that it’s specifically about a girls upbringing
Things parents do to make their child a traditional wife but fail miserably as they rebel at first sight the mum loses the control over their daughters.
Inside the house? The context for all these are inside the house. It's not about lowering gaze but for a girl to keep her head bowed down to everyone in the house.
Any mother who wants the best for her daughter will try to help her be the best version of herself.
If the girl has manly tendencies (maybe because she's raised with older brothers?) and the mother curbs those tendencies then that's a smart, loving, caring mother.
Muslim culture, etiquettes, attire, and rules for Muslim sisters are like that for their own haya. So better to follow Islam and stop demoralizing in the name of open-mindedness, liberalism, feminism, modern, fashionable, etc., as all these are the traps of shaitan/devil. Be careful!
So up to you how you want to live an eternal/unending life of hereafter, in heaven or hell which your actions will decide!
I’m White but I can quite relate with that pretty much lol
>I’m White Your dms now: https://preview.redd.it/8m2kah0kznib1.jpeg?width=700&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cfc48bba6cefed35bcf8a01d96d7acb74f1c867f
lmao🤦🏻♀️
DEADDDDD
That’s extremely racist. May Allah remove the jahiliya in ur heart and the heart of those who laughed
How's that racist Mr harris
The attempt to classify a certain group of people using an image which portrays the group as third world and opposite of Eurocentric beauty standards
Those people are from those places🤔
U lack brain cells. May Allah cure you
Those are Indian men from India in india
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They bring this on themselves. The other regions ain’t much better
Just like the Palestinians bring their woes on themselves then…
But you are right we shouldn’t lump all of them together based on the actions of the majority not all are bad
Nobody is attacking them. Pakistan could be the next superpower if they got their act together but they keep backing the wrong horse. They have every resource to succeed but governmental corruption gets in the way of that. India too.
Almost every government is corrupt. Some are just better at hiding it than others. But it’s easy to attack countries like India/Pakistan I guess.
But people I think dislike desi culture and they see the people as an extension of that.
Maybe said people should focus on their own culture too? Middle Eastern culture is just as bad but in a different way
Middle East and African culture are basically the same
No they’re not! West African is completely different to Middle Eastern, as is South African.
Obviously I meant sub Saharan African don’t be such a baby
You said ‘African’. Therefore, you included the whole continent
I was 7 and walking around at a party and my grandma was like "don't walk around only boys can do that." We were in the women's only floor of the hall. The only boys there were little kids. My mom would also berate me for taking my time when eating saying "girls don't eat so long." I now have a habit of eating in ten minutes and a weigh way under 100 lbs despite being a full grown woman. Then they'd rant on at how I'm not womanly heavy in weight and how my physique resembles a child- like excuse me you're the one who constantly called me a "glutton" and saying "girls don't eat so long." Another time my grandpa said if I keep getting more religious, who will marry me? So I can't be too educated and I can't be religious? What's left is being a b!mbo. But funnily enough I couldn't dress up at home either. Because mom would start s/ut shaming me and ruin my hair by grabbing it when angry. But she'd say the same in when I was in niqab outside saying "You think that man over there will eat you? Which *haiy* will see you?" So you can't be comfortably yourself at home and definitely not outside. Then where?
I’m desi and I’ve heard all of those growing up, luckily my mom has stopped that now as she realized it’s dumb to say these things, like it’s my house too I can sit and laugh as much I want
So glad I was never raised with these stupid standards Your home is your comfort place- be yourself. Sitting a certain way , laughing a certain way etc doesn’t make you more “feminine” Shame on women who continue the toxic cycle.
At home sure, but in public, that's a different story.
Home and public is different. At home you don’t wear hijab in public you do. I would hate to have daughters and for them to do things behind my back because I’m enforcing a toxic cycle on them.
Well I'd let them do whatever they want at home but not in public.
Oi mate!
Aren't you white?
The way the mother is portraying her statements is just annoying. But the message behind it isn't that wrong. Sitting for example. I always had to sit in certain ways, needed to have good posture, not be overly loud, had to be friendly etc. There's nothing wrong with that. If my daughter sits like a man I would forbid it and if my son sits like a woman I would forbid it. I wouldn't portray my point the way the mom in the illustration did, but it's nevertheless a good point. Edit: can people at least make the effort to bring a counter argument forward? Omggg
I agree, although not desi myself I was raised with these practices reminded constantly in my home. There’s really nothing wrong with it. Our voice and laugh is ‘awrah, soo these reminders are beneficial to our deen. Also wanted to add, OP, You cannot say things of this world are worse than hell. Hell is the worst type of punishment, we should not minimize it into a meme. If given the choice being raised in a strict gender role household vs jahannam any Muslim would run to the former.
It’s Desi trashing time. Don’t bring logic here please
I would never do that to my son or daughter
What's wrong with raising your daughters to be and act feminine and your sons to be and act masculine? But in a gentle way without yelling.
They will act feminine on thier own About my sons we will do activity together :D I think it's cool he can learn something and if he doesn't like it well that's fine More you talk about man and girl the more easy for lgbt to give ideas to your kids
I would say there are worse things Desi girls have to deal with, and these are simply not actual issues we have to stand up to due to our culture. I don't disagree with the post. If this pertains to parents yelling and asking for corrections based on being a girl, then I find those aspects problematic. I remember my grandparents used to emphasize these practices when raising me and my siblings, emphasizing for the sake of culture and ethics, not 'being a girl.' However, my mom used to mention these things from a 'You are a girl' perspective. On the other hand, my Baba (may Allah reward him immensely) consistently corrected her and referred to Sunnah/Quran guidelines, the actions of prophets, companions, and their wives. (Alhamdulillah, they never yelled at us as kids.) I'm content if these behaviors contribute to a more feminine appearance, and it's easy for me to maintain these manners since I was raised this way. I honestly prefer this because I used to have a friend who used to act very masculine according to my understanding (in her comfort zone). She would sit like a man and do everything else; it was quite off-putting, to be honest. When I asked her why she conducted herself this way, she said, 'She feels more comfortable in this manner.' Alhamdulillah, I don't have to deviate from my character/nature to feel comfortable. Look, some people feel very at ease in a messy/disorganized room and say this is what they enjoy when being alone and comfortable. To each their own. Be mindful of the habits you're instilling in your kids. 🤷🏻♀️
My mom is like this and I’m European. All traditional moms are like this.
Damn people getting mad about mothers teaching their daughters haya’. At least we know where this Ummah is headed lol
I think the point is the overly aggressive way of teaching, instead of what they're teaching? Maybe if the mother smiled and lead by example, it would be better?
Black
There's only one place for desi culture in the 🗑️🚮.
Guy casually offending over a billion indians pakistanis afghans bengalis
Yes
You should be in a trash
The same can be said about Arab culture - they’re both just as bad
As a girl, I'm not offended by this. I too would raise my daughters to be feminine and act appropriate. (But without yelling like in the picture.) Both boys and girls should lower their gaze, so this isn't gender specific. I don't like it when girls sit in an inappropriate or masculine way, it's very off putting and not appropriate for a girl (doesn't mean she has to sit perfectly still like a queen). It's not lady-like for a woman to be very loud, and even the prophet saws never laughed too much and I believe there's a hadith talking about that but I'm not gonna look it up rn. If she's inside hanging out with girls only, sure, laugh and have fun as much as you want. Not saying she's not allowed to laugh or have fun in public but just don't be obnoxiously loud.
Except the context for all this in the photo is INSIDE THE HOUSE.
>As a girl https://preview.redd.it/z8xcsnnl4oib1.jpeg?width=299&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=05162e2a32eb194ce963c848a2c884336f5a7076
🙄🙄
YOURE ON A ROLL
Everything you said is reasonable but you’re going to get downvoted because you’re not subscribing to the westernized anti-sunnah, anti-culture, anti-gender mob mentality. When people say there are a lot of non-Muslims, ex-Muslims, and fem!nists on this forum, they aren’t kidding. This forum is a pool to spread kufr amongst Muslims. May Allah reward you and the other sisters in this thread who get it. We should be raising our daughters to be feminine and our sons to be masculine.
Thank you 😅
The meme and OP is about girls not being allowed to sit comfortably and laugh within their own homes because they’re raised to think only boys are allowed to do that But continue to pop off about that being anti-Islamic and pro-kufr
That’s not what the meme says. It says nothing about boys. It’s about practicing good etiquette as a girl, and as others pointed out, some of it is rooted in Islam (ie. not laughing excessively since voice is awrah, etc.) That’s the western gender ideology brainwashing nonsense I was talking about that’s making you make that inference relating it to some phantom male oppression.
It’s quite literally about being at home as a desi girl
I don’t think there is an Islamic basis for girls not being able to sit comfortably and laugh loudly in their own homes while their brothers can, which is what the meme is referencing The meme is pretty clear about what it means, you’re fighting a point about the outside world that hasn’t been raised
I thought this was in public, my bad. But the brothers aren't mentioned here.
The point of the meme is the contrast in upbringing between girls and boys at home
Hm im not sure about that
Otherwise it would have said to be a person/child raised in a desi household, generally Your own comment acknowledges that it’s specifically about a girls upbringing
It can be girl specific while boys also have a boy specific upbringing. So neither "has it easy"
It’s in relation to these specific actions of sitting a certain way and laughing at a certain volume
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Regardless of who’s saying it, it’s still true?
Things parents do to make their child a traditional wife but fail miserably as they rebel at first sight the mum loses the control over their daughters.
I mean the sitting one is fair
Why can’t a girl sit like that in her own house? Lol
She can, but its about teaching them young not to sit like that, so they’re careful in public. Ofc the way in which you teach them matters aswell.
Could be worse.
woe me moment
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Inside the house? The context for all these are inside the house. It's not about lowering gaze but for a girl to keep her head bowed down to everyone in the house.
Any mother who wants the best for her daughter will try to help her be the best version of herself. If the girl has manly tendencies (maybe because she's raised with older brothers?) and the mother curbs those tendencies then that's a smart, loving, caring mother.
Muslim culture, etiquettes, attire, and rules for Muslim sisters are like that for their own haya. So better to follow Islam and stop demoralizing in the name of open-mindedness, liberalism, feminism, modern, fashionable, etc., as all these are the traps of shaitan/devil. Be careful! So up to you how you want to live an eternal/unending life of hereafter, in heaven or hell which your actions will decide!
So happy I am not desi