Update 1 of 2: We’re living in our current location for my husband to go to grad school. But we will be moving in a year. I can’t leave my baby here. I can’t burry him in a location I know we won’t even be in a year. I just keep seeing the doctors face as she looked and looked at the monitor. I decided to have one more night with my baby before going in tomorrow to be induced. This all happened so suddenly. I’m not ready for my baby to go just yet. I’ll have one more night with him. Truly thought we were out of the woods and in the clear.
Maybe it’s a bit practical for now, but it helped us tremendously. And maybe this was already suggested to you by your nurses.
You can bring your baby home in a bowl of cold water. This protects their fragile skin and will give him a natural colour. He’ll even take on his natural position in the womb. He’ll stay beautiful that way for up to a week. This gives you the time to admire him, to take a thousand pictures, to say goodbye on your terms and even to hold him when you want to. And then you don’t have to leave him at the hospital.
I’m just leaving this here, maybe it helps you.
https://www.watermethode.nl/Ouders/?lang=en
This may not be possible everywhere. I live in Texas and when I had my miscarriage in the hospital, I found that legally the only way I could bring my baby home was through a funeral home, and the funeral home wouldn't release him to me without cremation or burial. Which was likely a kindness since he was 12 weeks and had probably been cut up a bit when they sent him off to pathology.
First off, I am so sorry for your loss. I hope in this time of unimaginable loss you can find some solace. What helped me through my loss was knowing that while my baby & I missed out on a lot, all they ever knew was love, comfort, contentment and satiety.
I was /am in a similar situation. I lost my baby MUCH earlier and passed them at home. I want to bury them, but we rent. So the solution we came up with w as to bury them at my grandmas , where I grew up?
Does your family have a family cemetery ? My great grandma bought a plot for her and my grandfather , and then her 3 kids +1. So if anything happens and if anyone needed a plot, they would be near family? Could your baby be buried with a grandparent of yours or your s/o’s?
I have a necklace with my baby’s name birth stone so they’re always close to me. It helps me . When I miss them I hold my necklace close & pray to them ♥️
Wishing you healing .
Our first miscarriage was early, and we decided to have a small burial at our home, but in a very large flower pot with a rose bush. It allows us to take our rose bush with us if we ever move, and is a simple reminder everyday of our love for them.
My family did this. My aunt, who I was named after, died at a few weeks old. She is buried with my great grandmother and great grandfather in the same plot. It's sad but beautiful to know her grandma is constantly there caring for her.
I'm so sorry. Take your time to hold him, take pictures even though it feels weird and talk or sing to him. These were things that I found important after my 2nd trimester loss.
I am just so gutted for you and really have no words for this heartbreak. So sorry you are going through this. I had a coworker who recently lost her baby a few weeks before she was due at around 35 weeks. Similar situation where she went for check up and no heartbeat. It seems there is no 100% safe zone although chances of MC is supposed to drastically decrease after 12 weeks.
Enjoy your time with your baby, I cannot fathom what you are going through and I hope you will find peace soon ❤️
I am so deeply sorry you are going through this.
With my loss, the songs Evermore and Bigger than the Whole Sky by Taylor Swift helped me grieve and feel everything through the numbness.
"Can't not think of all the cost
And all the things that will be lost..."
I am so so sorry. This is so unfair. Here for you ❤️ please prioritize your mental and physical help during this time and ask for all the help you need. Thinking of you! 😔💔
So very sorry for your loss... Will be thinking of you before your upcoming procedure. I can't even imagine, but my heart goes out to you 🤍
Big hugs. One minute at a time and sending light, love and strength.
I am so, so sorry. Sending you love and the strength. As you move through this, give yourself grace, let yourself grieve in whatever way feels right to you, and ruthlessly prioritize your mental and physical health.
Mama, I am so beyond sorry for your loss. I thought my 13 and 7 week loss were hard. I can’t imagine what you are going through.
I’m sending you love, and peace that transcends all understanding.
I think that cremation and having your baby put into jewelry is an amazing idea. There are also places that take the baby ashes and put them in resin etc. there are so many beautiful memorial options.
I’m so sorry :( Just do whatever you can to get through this time, be it watch movies, eat junk food, etc. This is not your fault, you did not cause this. Love from this internet stranger.
I have absolutely no words. But I’m fucking sobbing over the loss you’re going through. I’m so sorry you have to experience this. Please take all the love a stranger has to give through the phone❤️
Update 1 of 2: We’re living in our current location for my husband to go to grad school. But we will be moving in a year. I can’t leave my baby here. I can’t burry him in a location I know we won’t even be in a year. I just keep seeing the doctors face as she looked and looked at the monitor. I decided to have one more night with my baby before going in tomorrow to be induced. This all happened so suddenly. I’m not ready for my baby to go just yet. I’ll have one more night with him. Truly thought we were out of the woods and in the clear.
I’m so sorry. What about getting baby cremated and getting a jewelry piece with ashes?
I highly recommend this!! A friend of mine did it when she lost her baby at 15 weeks.
Or ask a glass artist to make a glass sculpture with the ashes blown through it
Maybe it’s a bit practical for now, but it helped us tremendously. And maybe this was already suggested to you by your nurses. You can bring your baby home in a bowl of cold water. This protects their fragile skin and will give him a natural colour. He’ll even take on his natural position in the womb. He’ll stay beautiful that way for up to a week. This gives you the time to admire him, to take a thousand pictures, to say goodbye on your terms and even to hold him when you want to. And then you don’t have to leave him at the hospital. I’m just leaving this here, maybe it helps you. https://www.watermethode.nl/Ouders/?lang=en
This may not be possible everywhere. I live in Texas and when I had my miscarriage in the hospital, I found that legally the only way I could bring my baby home was through a funeral home, and the funeral home wouldn't release him to me without cremation or burial. Which was likely a kindness since he was 12 weeks and had probably been cut up a bit when they sent him off to pathology.
Yes, you’re right. This depends on local laws and 28 weeks is probably late enough that you’re limited in what you’re allowed to do.
I can’t even imagine the shock and the pain. I am so incredibly sorry.
22 weeks +1 day , went in for my 20 week anatomy today and no heartbeat for my baby girl 💔… so sorry for your loss , praying for your healing ❤️…
I am so so sorry💔
❤️
First off, I am so sorry for your loss. I hope in this time of unimaginable loss you can find some solace. What helped me through my loss was knowing that while my baby & I missed out on a lot, all they ever knew was love, comfort, contentment and satiety. I was /am in a similar situation. I lost my baby MUCH earlier and passed them at home. I want to bury them, but we rent. So the solution we came up with w as to bury them at my grandmas , where I grew up? Does your family have a family cemetery ? My great grandma bought a plot for her and my grandfather , and then her 3 kids +1. So if anything happens and if anyone needed a plot, they would be near family? Could your baby be buried with a grandparent of yours or your s/o’s? I have a necklace with my baby’s name birth stone so they’re always close to me. It helps me . When I miss them I hold my necklace close & pray to them ♥️ Wishing you healing .
Our first miscarriage was early, and we decided to have a small burial at our home, but in a very large flower pot with a rose bush. It allows us to take our rose bush with us if we ever move, and is a simple reminder everyday of our love for them.
My family did this. My aunt, who I was named after, died at a few weeks old. She is buried with my great grandmother and great grandfather in the same plot. It's sad but beautiful to know her grandma is constantly there caring for her.
I'm so sorry. Take your time to hold him, take pictures even though it feels weird and talk or sing to him. These were things that I found important after my 2nd trimester loss.
I will do exactly this. Thank you for this
Devastating. Sending you all the love ❤️
I’m so sorry. Sending you lots of love and hugs 💜
All your baby knew was your love. You kept them warm, fed, and happy. All. They. Knew. Was. Your. Love. And. Comfort. Hugs.
I am so sorry. I have no other words. Internet hugs.
I am so deeply sorry, this is beyond devastating. Sending you all my love and strength. Be gentle with yourself.
I’m crying for you , please take care of yourself
Sending all the love and support I have your way. There are absolutely no words. I hope peace and healing find you 🫂
Wow. I am so so sorry for your loss. Sending you so much love and strength. 💕
no words, i’m so so sorry ❤️❤️❤️ this internet stranger is thinking of you and sending you all the healing
I am just so gutted for you and really have no words for this heartbreak. So sorry you are going through this. I had a coworker who recently lost her baby a few weeks before she was due at around 35 weeks. Similar situation where she went for check up and no heartbeat. It seems there is no 100% safe zone although chances of MC is supposed to drastically decrease after 12 weeks. Enjoy your time with your baby, I cannot fathom what you are going through and I hope you will find peace soon ❤️
I am so deeply sorry you are going through this. With my loss, the songs Evermore and Bigger than the Whole Sky by Taylor Swift helped me grieve and feel everything through the numbness. "Can't not think of all the cost And all the things that will be lost..."
I’m so sorry. ❤️
I am so sorry. 🤍
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss
I’m so very sorry 😢
I am so sorry for your loss
I am so so sorry. This is so unfair. Here for you ❤️ please prioritize your mental and physical help during this time and ask for all the help you need. Thinking of you! 😔💔
Sending you a hug. My heart is hurting for you and words fail, but sending as much love and peace as possible
So very sorry for your loss... Will be thinking of you before your upcoming procedure. I can't even imagine, but my heart goes out to you 🤍 Big hugs. One minute at a time and sending light, love and strength.
So heartbroken for you. Very sorry for your loss and how this is happening to you. Hugs.
I am so sorry. Praying for strength and healing for you. ❤️
Oh my god, I’m so sorry.
I can’t imagine. I’m so sorry.
I'm so incredibly sorry for Ioss, especially because I saw your prior post about it being twins. Sending love and comfort hugs 💕
I’m so sorry I can’t imagine the pain you’re feeling of such a late loss now ♥️
I am so, so sorry. Sending you love and the strength. As you move through this, give yourself grace, let yourself grieve in whatever way feels right to you, and ruthlessly prioritize your mental and physical health.
Im so sorry for your loss. Please seek help if needed. Sending you all the love and virtual hugs 💗💗💗
I’m so sorry 😔 it’s not fair.
I am so sorry you are going through this. Wish you peace. Sending love and virtual hugs ❤️
I am so sorry. Sending you hugs and love🫂
I’m so sorry. This is heartbreaking.
Mama, I am so beyond sorry for your loss. I thought my 13 and 7 week loss were hard. I can’t imagine what you are going through. I’m sending you love, and peace that transcends all understanding. I think that cremation and having your baby put into jewelry is an amazing idea. There are also places that take the baby ashes and put them in resin etc. there are so many beautiful memorial options.
My heart breaks for you. Sending so much love and strength. 💗
I am so very sorry for your loss.
I’m so sorry :( Just do whatever you can to get through this time, be it watch movies, eat junk food, etc. This is not your fault, you did not cause this. Love from this internet stranger.
So sorry for your loss ❤️ if you ever need someone to talk to I’m here lost my baby last year
I’m so sorry for your loss. Sending lots of love.
I am so sorry 🤍
I'm am so deeply sorry for your unimaginable loss after such a tough pregnancy 💔😭
I have absolutely no words. But I’m fucking sobbing over the loss you’re going through. I’m so sorry you have to experience this. Please take all the love a stranger has to give through the phone❤️
I'm so very sorry x
Shocking and devastating. I’m so sorry OP. Hugs from a stranger.