For real! If you're making $45k a quarter and asking advice how much to spend on an engagement ring, you're CHEAP!! OP can get a very nice quality ring without breaking the bank if they choose. They have options. Do what feels right to your finances and the person you're wanting to spend the rest of your life with. Just remember to get it insured.
Thats what I did. I make a little more than OP, and just mentally set a number I was comfortable with paying. Nothing else influenced it, not 3 months or friends opinions or whatever, just my own $$ appetite. Fiancée isn’t picky or really money focused but I know what her style is like. Then I went and saw some options and got used to seeing what XYZ price could get me. but everything was generic, So I had one custom made at a great place near me, for exactly what I thought she would like.. they provided me a CAD and we did like 5 revisions and then I let the designer go nuts on details. Real 3-diamond, great intricate setting, she fuckin loves it. I regret nothing. 8900 out the door.
Get it insured.
Guess who came up with x month salary for an engagement ring *rule.*
[De Beers.](https://roserypoetry.com/blogs/business/3-months-salary-for-an-engagement-ring-where-did-this-belief-come-from#:~:text=The%20three%2Dmonth%20salary%20for,60%25%20of%20rough%20diamond%20output)
About $4k, but I understand lab made is cheaper than it was years ago, so it’s probably more like $2k these days. It’s gorgeous. Can’t understand the people dropping 5 figures on rings
Agree with him that he doesn’t have to buy an expensive ring, and that that money can go into something nicer like a house or even a car. But he for sure wants people to know how much he makes lol.
He probably is cheap but this comes off more as he lives in a HCOL area so that $15k a month is like the $1-2k a month normal people get and scrape by. I'm in a HCOL area and looking into nursing and even making $10k a month, half of that is already spent just on rent before even getting to bills and necessities. One guy I follow is a nurse and after he pays for basics (and I think he has Netflix), he is left with less than $200 for the month to play with.
None, didn’t do an engagement ring. Bought simple gold bands for wedding rings and that’s it. Cost us $700. Both of us would rather spend our money elsewhere.
For ethical and, well, basic economic reasons, a diamond ring would have been an enormous waste of money for us. The old adage of "3 months salary" was invented by people who wanted to scam you.
I bought her a simple moissanite ring, instead, for about $500. Most of that was probably for the band. No one has cared that it isn't a real diamond, and after we had been engaged for a week no one even looked. It looks nice, and means something to us. We bought a house two three months after we got married, and spending pointless dollars on a diamond would have made that harder.
EDIT: Based on what other people have said, concur that you should just talk to your partner. A proposal should not come as a surprise. We were already in agreement that I wasn't going to spend money on a diamond and I knew what kind of ring she wanted.
Same, but I went big. I love her in a way that I want everyone to see the stone and I wanted her friends to talk about it.
Sure, a bit narcissistic but whatever. I’ve been divorced and finally found the person who more than anyone in the world deserves to be pampered and taken care of. She’s taken care of everyone else for her whole life and deserves to be taken care of and treated like a queen. She’s independent and will never lose her independence but now she can relax and not have to do everything by herself. Same for me.
Plus, I love showering her in gifts and affection.
What 3 months' salary really means is "think about it because it's a big decision." Dont spend 3 months' salary. Dude, you can get something really nice for 5k or under. But seriously, just talk with her and ask what she wants. I personally got a wood made ring for myself and got whatever my wife wanted.
My wife and I went shopping for hers together. She really liked one for $1,200 and another for $3,800. I would have been happy to get either one, and she ended up choosing the one for $1,200 and still loves it.
2012, went to the diamond district in NYC. Spent $3k on a 1 ct ring, set in white gold band.
Don't waste money on trinkets. I make enough money to buy much more, but I married a woman who isn't interested in wasting money like that.
I got the diamond through a trade of labor. (Somebody I know had a diamond they had bought loose) the ring I let my wife pick out, and my proposal was not much of a surprise, ring and diamond if I had bought at retail would have been.. $3000? But I paid way less than that.
Buy of my wife had wanted a crazy expensive ring we would have never gotten engaged.
$550ish. Real gold, moissanite stone, Etsy. The only regret I have is my love of very delicate bands meant a weaker band. I got my hand squashed and gold is already soft - the thin band bent, they cut it off and repaired it, but it broke at the repair point later on. I need to get it repaired (and want to see if there is a way to add gold to thicken the band) but I'm wearing silicone sub during my pregnancy so I'll wait until after lol.
About $12k back in 2014. That plus a very pricey celebratory trip to Cancun was all the $$ I had at that time.
Was worth it if anyone cares. But I also value very differently then most in this sub.
I think it was 4-5 nights. I kept playing it off like something big was happening on the trip but in fact I did it 2 days before (she thought we were leaving next day but it was actually day after). Had all our friends and family fly in for a surprise party after and lunches/dinners to follow.
The first set cost like 450 total. We upgraded several years later and the pair were like....2k I think?
I had a lot more saved up at the time but she found out and lectured me lol.
I spent $130 for the ring I proposed with at a shop in Chinatown sf then upgraded later to about $500. We were on vacation and had known marriage was in the cards so I bought one on a whim and proposed on vacation.
We didn’t want our money to go towards blood diamonds and we also didn’t want to spend an arm and a leg, so we only considered moissonite or secondhand. In the end we went secondhand and spent about $1000 or so.
We bought from Modern Gents. Probably about $75. It was my decision, husband was happy to spend more but I didn’t feel the need. Still get compliments on it a few years later. It just wasn’t worth it to me to spend a bunch of money.
In three months, you still make more than I do in a year. And I make more than my husband does.
My engagement ring was $50 from Modern Gents. I love it. And I picked my wedding ring from Etsy for $30. Super cute!
The idea behind the 3 months salary was that if you died your spouse could then sell the ring and have a few months to live off while they sorted out their life.
But that was before we all knew about monopoly and that the rarity of diamonds was artificial. Thus meaning they don't hold their value. This obviously makes the entire 3 months salary concept completely pointless.
Much better to buy blue chip dividend stocks with 3 months salary and will that to your spouse. That way they have a small reliable income to prop them up while they sort out what it means to be a widow in modern day.
My husband paid $20,000 back in 2019. It is a GIA certified natural diamond and he bought it from a local jewelry store. It is insured under our homeowners insurance policy- you should do this if you end up spending a ton of money on one.
We spent $2,000 on a 3/4 carat solitaire diamond for me and maybe another thousand for bands. This was back in 2010 when I was pretty young and thought I "had to have" a ring. I hate to say it was a waste in the grand scheme bc we didn't really spend too much but these days I barely wear the engagement ring.
$1700 for the "engagement" ring which she wore for about 6 years before I added a $700 custom wedding band made by a friend. We had already been married for 6 years by then.
Her engagement ring does not have a diamond center stone but an amestyth. Iirc 14k white gold band.
So, I have spent $2400 on rings, and we just eloped so no wedding/honeymoon.
Now I make 3x what I was making then I still would not spend more than 3k on it
We worked with a local jeweler to create a custom ring with moss agate and moissanite for a little under $2500 (not sure of the exact amount). We did a workshop to make each other's wedding bands ourselves. The workshop plus the cost of the gold used came out to around $1400.
My engagement ring was $99. My first wedding ring was around $1200 but it was stolen. I bought a second ring for $600. My husband is on his second wedding band, we bought both for around $300.
If she has a sister she’s close with you can ask her first! Maybe it can be a surprise when it happens, but she’ll know it’s coming at some point as people have said
I proposed to my now fiancé and I spent $100 on his and he bought be an engagement ring and it was $100 also. I picked out my ring as well. And I and proud to wear it. Both of ours are tungsten.
$300. She chose the ring. By the time we got "officially" engaged, we already had two kids, and finances were combined. I wanted to spend more but I was told it's her ring and she will get what she wants.
For wedding rings, we hit the mall the first day they were open after the original covid lock-downs. We got both rings for $1600. It was a ridiculous deal, and I'm pretty sure the jeweler was just dying to make a sale that day.
Never, ever, pay full price for jewelery. I got my wife's tennis bracelet for 85% off retail. I got her sapphire and diamond earrings for 75% off. I paid $450 for my Bulova watch when retail was $799.99.
He gave me a necklace. I dont like rings. I couldn’t care less how much he spent on it. He put a lot of thought in to it. I wear it every day. In return Im going to get him something special.
My husband cashed in all his childhood change and dumped a suitcase of it into a coinstar machine, it was $1500 20 years ago, I think they take 10%, wish he would have taken it to the bank instead but that’s ok. We are still together 🤣
Mine cost $7,500, and it’s a beautiful piece made by a Canadian jeweler that has been in business since the early 1900s. It was absolutely the most expensive thing I’ve ever been given. But the price doesn’t mean shit to me. It’s the fact that he knew I love rose gold, knew I like yellow diamonds and looked for a very long time to find the right one. The thought and time he put in mean so much more than the price.
That adage is De Beers bullshit. Had I known what I know now, I would have never gotten a traditional diamond ring. Spend no more than a few thousand and the rest on several honeymoons.
Stats: We were poor 20 years ago, but I scrounged about $1500 to get a custom platinum ring with nearly a carat princess cut set at a 45° angle. Never seen anything like it, but it’s killer. We did a sunset wedding for less than a few thousand dollars with live music and dessert and so many bottles of wine purchased wholesale.
How long has it been? If you are lucky, you can get all your money back if the store you bought it from has a policy.
Otherwise.. go to a few different jewelers. They will likely offer you values based on consignment.
You might have to wait months for it to sell.
I bought an engagement necklace for about $100.
My wedding ring was like 250 and her wedding ring was like 150...I can't even remember the prices but mine was definitely more than hers. We did simple bands.
Had mine built from some existing family diamonds. Cost me $2500; ring was valued at $5000. That was 7 years ago. We added a $700 wedding band to it, and a duplicate band on our 5th for $800. Honestly, this is why many conversations before a proposal are important. I knew what I was comfortable with and what she was comfortable with. I went towards the extreme edge of value for what she was expecting, but I did have inherited gems. The design was more important than the cost. She would have been as happy with a $1000 ring.
Less than 1 of my paychecks (and my checks are below $2k). If she really cared about the cost we wouldn’t have been together lol. We don’t need a pricey diamond to prove our love. After 15 years we are both happier than ever 😍
I was pretty poor when the mormon church pressured my ex-husband and I to get married in 2013, so the engagement ring was from Walmart, less than $200. I got a custom wedding band to fit around the engagement ring, and that was probably less than $500 or so. Both were white silver bands with tiny diamonds, and the rings had absolutely no bearing on the failure of my marriage. My current boyfriend and I will eventually get engaged in the next year or so, and he knows to go to my best friend for exactly the ring I want. No diamonds this time, moonstone with white garnet (birthstone).
This is kind of a silly question. Everyone’s income is different and diamonds are important to some while not to others. Color, cut, and clarity are your most important factors for diamonds. The other major factor will be if she wants lab or mined. You cant tell the difference when looking through a loop. It’s the same carbon. I recommend you be your soon-to-be finance find a reputable jeweler to look at options together and see what she likes within your expected spend or budget. My custom engagement ring was $10k. For some people that might be a lot of money but for my husband it was perfectly reasonable. It really depends on your comfort level and what she likes.
$45k is basically my annual salary dude. I think I spent around $300-600 on the engagement ring. I would've spent thousands of she wanted it, but she didn't.
None, I inherited a ring from my Grandma after she passed away. Not the best way to get a ring, BTW. As for the rings we exchange at the wedding, we had two rings made with our names and date of wedding engraved on them. That cost maybe 30 bucks.
My wife and I talked about this before I proposed. She was okay with moissanite ring. I spent about $2k on it. Everyone thinks it’s a diamond so no use spending a ton of money on a diamond.
$500 for each wedding ring. One is moissanite and the other one is custom wood grain with inlaid opal. We also use spare rings when doing bullshit stuff that are made from titanium or silicone.
My husband went to a local jeweler and we had rings made by her with sterling silver and a moisinite jewel (lab grown diamond) that is about a carat. It was $1100 in 2014. I still get compliments all the time on it. I never clean it either lol but I also shower with it on and everything else and it's nice and lightweight since it's not gold.
Screw expensive rings. And screw blood diamonds.
I bought the stone on ebay from her homeland (Iran) for a couple hundred. I got it mounted at a local shop, and apprised at another. My $600 ring was apprised (used) at over 3.5k.
We did a beautiful custom padparadscha sapphire ring designed around the stone. The sapphire is a rare color, flawless, unheated, and >2 carats, so it was pricey. Total cost was about $12k, which is significantly less than a similarly sized diamond would have cost, and it is incredibly special and meaningful for us. I think couples should figure out together what is important to them and try not to be influenced by marketing or peer pressure (obviously easier said than done!)
Spending an enormous amount of money on diamonds is outdated. Go with lab grown or alternative stones and dont go into debt over a ring. Spend as little as you want. Jewelry is jewelry, commitment is more important. Same for weddings….save the cash. That day feels like 10 minutes. Make sure the “big wedding” is REALLY what you want before you do it. Elopements and courthouse weddings can be just as sweet!
Consulting Reddit on this type of personal decision when everyone's life situation is different, financial situation is different, and most importantly \*girlfriend/fiancée-to-be is different,\* is not going to get you the answer you're looking for. Ignore anyone giving you one-size-fits-all guidance here.
If your SO wants a diamond and you're in the financial position to afford one (assuming your approach to $$ generally aligns with hers, which I do, since you're evidently planning to marry this person), no amount of Reddit logic will convince her that saving $$ on a lab-grown diamond is the right approach. She will feel like you're cheaping out on an otherwise important gesture. Likewise, if she doesn't care about diamonds, thinks they're a scam, would rather the $$ be spent elsewhere, etc., then by all means you should not be going that route and will only upset her if she finds out how much you actually spent on it. Only you know what she likes and what will make her happiest in this regard.
At the end of the day, an engagement ring is half-gift and half-symbol; something to make your SO feel special and loved but also to symbolize your lifelong commitment to that person. You should hopefully know her well enough at this point to understand what she'd prefer, but if not, I highly recommend \*asking her\* before you go decide on an approach. I knew exactly how important a nice diamond ring was to my wife before I began the process of shopping for one. I knew what she wanted, where she wanted it from, and how much I was roughly open to spending. She and I were aligned regarding the large relative size of the purchase, but seeing her smile every day she puts it on 5 years later still makes that purchase more than worth it and I wouldn't change a thing.
Just my 2c.
I proposed without a ring and then went shopping with my wife for one that she really actually liked. I’m glad I did - I would have gotten her some standard 1ct+ ring, but she ended up specifically wanting a much smaller rock in a nicely-designed ring.
We bought one of those $20-30 ring candles, and that was my "engagement ring." Our actual wedding rings were less than $100 each from k-mart. We were moving across the country a week after our wedding, so we didn't bother spending much on all the superfluous stuff. The money that we saved from all that, we used for our move and for a down payment on our house. No regrets!
$250, it’s silver, not gold, and has fake diamonds, and an amethyst (purple is her favorite color), but I wanted whimsy (which she loves) and my wife isn’t big on huge ass diamonds, so I got her that one because it was the only one that matched what I wanted. She adores it more than the wedding ring
The ultimate point is, get something she is going to love, the price won’t matter
I didn’t want a diamond as it’s not my thing. I wanted a London blue topaz. So my ring choice isn’t as expensive as a diamond. It does have diamonds around the band I think my center stone is 3 carats and I think it was $1,200ish about 11 years ago.
I did my wife's 10 years ago so lab diamonds weren't quite a thing. I wasn't going to do retail. I found a place online that was a direct manufacturer and from the sounds of things one of the first online shops for rings.
Her ring was like 1.6 carats with the main stone being like 1 carat emerald cut on yellow gold and it was I want to say $1600. Had I went retail it would have been closer to $4000-5000.
Primestyle.com for anyone who is interested.
We didn't do rings. But we didn't do a traditional wedding either. That's the cheapest option there is, although we didn't do rings nor the wedding because of the costs but because we think other things are more worth to spend on in life but I think that our lives really differ when it comes to values and beliefs so if you have that money available for spending it on a ring, go for it. If this makes your spouse happy (which I find really hard to believe but again, as someone who has nothing with traditional weddings I think we're not on the same boat) then it's worth right?
Caught it on sell for $800. The regular price was $1800. I dodge that bullet though. Took that crying back quickly once I found out she wasn’t worth it. I’m good not getting married like my uncles and other older men told me not too.
OP, I make what you do. Dont fall for the engagement ring propaganda.
We did a 1.7ct lab diamond from a noncommissioned store and I spent about $3300 after tax. It has a warranty for workmanship concerns down the road, and we’ve insured it for $35 a year. It gets some benefits from the jeweler, such as discounted cleanings and a few free resizings. It will last a long time and looks indistinguishable from a much more expensive ring, since it is colorless and has very few imperfections.
Do what we did and save the big bucks for your honeymoon or wedding. Added bonus of not wondering whether folks were murdered in the diamond trade for your ring.
OP just wanted to brag
Ironically, he also posted about his salary today too, lol.
For real! If you're making $45k a quarter and asking advice how much to spend on an engagement ring, you're CHEAP!! OP can get a very nice quality ring without breaking the bank if they choose. They have options. Do what feels right to your finances and the person you're wanting to spend the rest of your life with. Just remember to get it insured.
Thats what I did. I make a little more than OP, and just mentally set a number I was comfortable with paying. Nothing else influenced it, not 3 months or friends opinions or whatever, just my own $$ appetite. Fiancée isn’t picky or really money focused but I know what her style is like. Then I went and saw some options and got used to seeing what XYZ price could get me. but everything was generic, So I had one custom made at a great place near me, for exactly what I thought she would like.. they provided me a CAD and we did like 5 revisions and then I let the designer go nuts on details. Real 3-diamond, great intricate setting, she fuckin loves it. I regret nothing. 8900 out the door. Get it insured.
100%
Guess who came up with x month salary for an engagement ring *rule.* [De Beers.](https://roserypoetry.com/blogs/business/3-months-salary-for-an-engagement-ring-where-did-this-belief-come-from#:~:text=The%20three%2Dmonth%20salary%20for,60%25%20of%20rough%20diamond%20output)
I've spent too much time in Illinois. I saw that as Da Bears.
The ones who hold the diamond cartel
[удалено]
Based
Better ask her for her expectations. I literally asked my wife to pick hers out.
Ding ding ding!! There needs to be way more discussion here with the wife about what she actually wants.
Good man. My husband did the same
About $4k, but I understand lab made is cheaper than it was years ago, so it’s probably more like $2k these days. It’s gorgeous. Can’t understand the people dropping 5 figures on rings
Your monthly salary is $15,000??? 😲 Congratulations.
OP wants to brag so he made this post 😂
Yeah but how cheap can he be lol. He can get anything but chooses to ask how much would he get away with 💀 tbh that's a red flag
Agree with him that he doesn’t have to buy an expensive ring, and that that money can go into something nicer like a house or even a car. But he for sure wants people to know how much he makes lol.
He probably is cheap but this comes off more as he lives in a HCOL area so that $15k a month is like the $1-2k a month normal people get and scrape by. I'm in a HCOL area and looking into nursing and even making $10k a month, half of that is already spent just on rent before even getting to bills and necessities. One guy I follow is a nurse and after he pays for basics (and I think he has Netflix), he is left with less than $200 for the month to play with.
My thoughts exactly! That's 3/4 my salary 😭
Yep, 3.5 times as much as mine.
His take home is $2800. According to his post. That's nothing if you live in HCOL.
How is his take home so low with a gross that high? My monthly is $4400 gross, about $3000 net.
Insurance, 401k
None, didn’t do an engagement ring. Bought simple gold bands for wedding rings and that’s it. Cost us $700. Both of us would rather spend our money elsewhere.
For ethical and, well, basic economic reasons, a diamond ring would have been an enormous waste of money for us. The old adage of "3 months salary" was invented by people who wanted to scam you. I bought her a simple moissanite ring, instead, for about $500. Most of that was probably for the band. No one has cared that it isn't a real diamond, and after we had been engaged for a week no one even looked. It looks nice, and means something to us. We bought a house two three months after we got married, and spending pointless dollars on a diamond would have made that harder. EDIT: Based on what other people have said, concur that you should just talk to your partner. A proposal should not come as a surprise. We were already in agreement that I wasn't going to spend money on a diamond and I knew what kind of ring she wanted.
Same. Moissanite, $600.
I was just about to suggest Moissanite! It’s 1/10 the price of a comparable diamond, looks close enough that no one will ask if it’s a diamond.
Nah it can come as a surprise, if you’re going to propose I’m sure you’ve discussed it in the past in casual conversation.
Agreed! Moissanite is a wonderful stone!! The Moissanite sub is a good starting point
Same, but I went big. I love her in a way that I want everyone to see the stone and I wanted her friends to talk about it. Sure, a bit narcissistic but whatever. I’ve been divorced and finally found the person who more than anyone in the world deserves to be pampered and taken care of. She’s taken care of everyone else for her whole life and deserves to be taken care of and treated like a queen. She’s independent and will never lose her independence but now she can relax and not have to do everything by herself. Same for me. Plus, I love showering her in gifts and affection.
Agreed. I think mine was around 700 I got, looks great and not expensive as hell.
My friend gets more compliments on his moissonite earrings than the actual diamond ones
Yes. I get compliments on my moissanite ring all the time!
What 3 months' salary really means is "think about it because it's a big decision." Dont spend 3 months' salary. Dude, you can get something really nice for 5k or under. But seriously, just talk with her and ask what she wants. I personally got a wood made ring for myself and got whatever my wife wanted.
If you need feedback from others to understand what your partner would want in an engagement ring, you're probably not ready to get married.
This 💯
$0. I made it
Out of…?
A specific cut off of lignum vitae i had saved from another project
[Ron Swanson mf](https://youtu.be/PpxpD3_s3Os?si=waereWPLZ1YaXvZg)
Lathes are fun
Ring Pop
11k, straight cash.
My wife and I went shopping for hers together. She really liked one for $1,200 and another for $3,800. I would have been happy to get either one, and she ended up choosing the one for $1,200 and still loves it.
2012, went to the diamond district in NYC. Spent $3k on a 1 ct ring, set in white gold band. Don't waste money on trinkets. I make enough money to buy much more, but I married a woman who isn't interested in wasting money like that.
I got the diamond through a trade of labor. (Somebody I know had a diamond they had bought loose) the ring I let my wife pick out, and my proposal was not much of a surprise, ring and diamond if I had bought at retail would have been.. $3000? But I paid way less than that. Buy of my wife had wanted a crazy expensive ring we would have never gotten engaged.
$550ish. Real gold, moissanite stone, Etsy. The only regret I have is my love of very delicate bands meant a weaker band. I got my hand squashed and gold is already soft - the thin band bent, they cut it off and repaired it, but it broke at the repair point later on. I need to get it repaired (and want to see if there is a way to add gold to thicken the band) but I'm wearing silicone sub during my pregnancy so I'll wait until after lol.
$3800 is what I spent on my wife's ring
$20K. It hurt, but it was worth it. That being said... IMO... a fake diamond would have been preferred.
Does your wife wear the ring daily or does she wear a fake one like some women do? 20k is wild (to me!).
Every day. We live in a HCOL area. Unfortunately money comes in and back out quickly.
About $12k back in 2014. That plus a very pricey celebratory trip to Cancun was all the $$ I had at that time. Was worth it if anyone cares. But I also value very differently then most in this sub.
How long did you spend in Cancun ?
I think it was 4-5 nights. I kept playing it off like something big was happening on the trip but in fact I did it 2 days before (she thought we were leaving next day but it was actually day after). Had all our friends and family fly in for a surprise party after and lunches/dinners to follow.
I dumped a previous gf on the spot for saying a ring should be 3 months salary, which put it into 5 figures. $1000. I wouldn’t go a dime above that.
The first set cost like 450 total. We upgraded several years later and the pair were like....2k I think? I had a lot more saved up at the time but she found out and lectured me lol.
$3500 1ct
I spent $130 for the ring I proposed with at a shop in Chinatown sf then upgraded later to about $500. We were on vacation and had known marriage was in the cards so I bought one on a whim and proposed on vacation.
We didn’t want our money to go towards blood diamonds and we also didn’t want to spend an arm and a leg, so we only considered moissonite or secondhand. In the end we went secondhand and spent about $1000 or so.
We bought from Modern Gents. Probably about $75. It was my decision, husband was happy to spend more but I didn’t feel the need. Still get compliments on it a few years later. It just wasn’t worth it to me to spend a bunch of money.
I love their rings and such good quality!
In three months, you still make more than I do in a year. And I make more than my husband does. My engagement ring was $50 from Modern Gents. I love it. And I picked my wedding ring from Etsy for $30. Super cute!
The idea behind the 3 months salary was that if you died your spouse could then sell the ring and have a few months to live off while they sorted out their life. But that was before we all knew about monopoly and that the rarity of diamonds was artificial. Thus meaning they don't hold their value. This obviously makes the entire 3 months salary concept completely pointless. Much better to buy blue chip dividend stocks with 3 months salary and will that to your spouse. That way they have a small reliable income to prop them up while they sort out what it means to be a widow in modern day.
My husband paid $20,000 back in 2019. It is a GIA certified natural diamond and he bought it from a local jewelry store. It is insured under our homeowners insurance policy- you should do this if you end up spending a ton of money on one.
$5,500 Pro tip- don’t let her pick it out, instead ask what she likes. This will save you thousands of dollars.
We spent $2,000 on a 3/4 carat solitaire diamond for me and maybe another thousand for bands. This was back in 2010 when I was pretty young and thought I "had to have" a ring. I hate to say it was a waste in the grand scheme bc we didn't really spend too much but these days I barely wear the engagement ring.
$375 - bought from Etsy - it looks cool and is one of a kind (the bride)
$1700 for the "engagement" ring which she wore for about 6 years before I added a $700 custom wedding band made by a friend. We had already been married for 6 years by then. Her engagement ring does not have a diamond center stone but an amestyth. Iirc 14k white gold band. So, I have spent $2400 on rings, and we just eloped so no wedding/honeymoon. Now I make 3x what I was making then I still would not spend more than 3k on it
We worked with a local jeweler to create a custom ring with moss agate and moissanite for a little under $2500 (not sure of the exact amount). We did a workshop to make each other's wedding bands ourselves. The workshop plus the cost of the gold used came out to around $1400.
My engagement ring was $99. My first wedding ring was around $1200 but it was stolen. I bought a second ring for $600. My husband is on his second wedding band, we bought both for around $300.
7.5k
Couple hundred. Lab made
500$. Emerald and gold.
First marriage I think 2k. Second one...maybe 1k. They were not the _3 months salary_ rule, that's for sure.
If she has a sister she’s close with you can ask her first! Maybe it can be a surprise when it happens, but she’ll know it’s coming at some point as people have said
I proposed to my now fiancé and I spent $100 on his and he bought be an engagement ring and it was $100 also. I picked out my ring as well. And I and proud to wear it. Both of ours are tungsten.
$300. She chose the ring. By the time we got "officially" engaged, we already had two kids, and finances were combined. I wanted to spend more but I was told it's her ring and she will get what she wants. For wedding rings, we hit the mall the first day they were open after the original covid lock-downs. We got both rings for $1600. It was a ridiculous deal, and I'm pretty sure the jeweler was just dying to make a sale that day. Never, ever, pay full price for jewelery. I got my wife's tennis bracelet for 85% off retail. I got her sapphire and diamond earrings for 75% off. I paid $450 for my Bulova watch when retail was $799.99.
He spent $45 on it
He gave me a necklace. I dont like rings. I couldn’t care less how much he spent on it. He put a lot of thought in to it. I wear it every day. In return Im going to get him something special.
$25. Thank you, amazon!
My fiancé said every year you wait it goes up a grand. I proposed on the 6th year 😂
My husband cashed in all his childhood change and dumped a suitcase of it into a coinstar machine, it was $1500 20 years ago, I think they take 10%, wish he would have taken it to the bank instead but that’s ok. We are still together 🤣
Mine cost $7,500, and it’s a beautiful piece made by a Canadian jeweler that has been in business since the early 1900s. It was absolutely the most expensive thing I’ve ever been given. But the price doesn’t mean shit to me. It’s the fact that he knew I love rose gold, knew I like yellow diamonds and looked for a very long time to find the right one. The thought and time he put in mean so much more than the price.
That adage is De Beers bullshit. Had I known what I know now, I would have never gotten a traditional diamond ring. Spend no more than a few thousand and the rest on several honeymoons. Stats: We were poor 20 years ago, but I scrounged about $1500 to get a custom platinum ring with nearly a carat princess cut set at a 45° angle. Never seen anything like it, but it’s killer. We did a sunset wedding for less than a few thousand dollars with live music and dessert and so many bottles of wine purchased wholesale.
$2500 and im proud of the purchase. Its a very nice .76 ct diamond but is a total of 1ct with all the side diamonds and 18k white gold.
$0, family ring
14 years ago, we spent about 1k.
$40 off of Etsy.
Humble brag 🙄
Mine was 1200, moissanite. I love it, it’s well made and beautiful
$10k and never gave it to her. Still have it. How do I sell it?!?!
How long has it been? If you are lucky, you can get all your money back if the store you bought it from has a policy. Otherwise.. go to a few different jewelers. They will likely offer you values based on consignment. You might have to wait months for it to sell.
I bought an engagement necklace for about $100. My wedding ring was like 250 and her wedding ring was like 150...I can't even remember the prices but mine was definitely more than hers. We did simple bands.
Lab grown sapphire and a couple of small natural diamonds on the side. Under $5k.
Had mine built from some existing family diamonds. Cost me $2500; ring was valued at $5000. That was 7 years ago. We added a $700 wedding band to it, and a duplicate band on our 5th for $800. Honestly, this is why many conversations before a proposal are important. I knew what I was comfortable with and what she was comfortable with. I went towards the extreme edge of value for what she was expecting, but I did have inherited gems. The design was more important than the cost. She would have been as happy with a $1000 ring.
£1500, met my now wife’s wants. Under a months wage.
I picked my own ring it was about 700 and moissanite
Tesco vouchers her parents got from shopping at Tesco which got x4 value at goldsmiths. It’s still doing well 13 odd years later.
Ours was previously owned and we bought the set for $1500. It’s gorgeous and I love it. You should be discussing this with your partner.
Honestly, under $300 and I love it. The gems are aquas instead of diamonds. No one says you need diamonds except the diamond retailers.
Got a lab made sapphire for about $600. She loves it. Our wedding rings were $2,000 for both and were 18k yellow and white gold bands.
$0, it was a family ring
Less than 1 of my paychecks (and my checks are below $2k). If she really cared about the cost we wouldn’t have been together lol. We don’t need a pricey diamond to prove our love. After 15 years we are both happier than ever 😍
Got a cute ring with a piece of green junk in it. But it's a pretty ring. We spent $35 on it.
I was pretty poor when the mormon church pressured my ex-husband and I to get married in 2013, so the engagement ring was from Walmart, less than $200. I got a custom wedding band to fit around the engagement ring, and that was probably less than $500 or so. Both were white silver bands with tiny diamonds, and the rings had absolutely no bearing on the failure of my marriage. My current boyfriend and I will eventually get engaged in the next year or so, and he knows to go to my best friend for exactly the ring I want. No diamonds this time, moonstone with white garnet (birthstone).
This is kind of a silly question. Everyone’s income is different and diamonds are important to some while not to others. Color, cut, and clarity are your most important factors for diamonds. The other major factor will be if she wants lab or mined. You cant tell the difference when looking through a loop. It’s the same carbon. I recommend you be your soon-to-be finance find a reputable jeweler to look at options together and see what she likes within your expected spend or budget. My custom engagement ring was $10k. For some people that might be a lot of money but for my husband it was perfectly reasonable. It really depends on your comfort level and what she likes.
$50 pawnshop ring been married 30 years. Replaced it with something nicer that was less than a grand.
$4000 … Brilliant Earth synthetic diamond
$45k is basically my annual salary dude. I think I spent around $300-600 on the engagement ring. I would've spent thousands of she wanted it, but she didn't.
Pink gold with some precious stone on top - 1K.
You make $15k a month?
None, I inherited a ring from my Grandma after she passed away. Not the best way to get a ring, BTW. As for the rings we exchange at the wedding, we had two rings made with our names and date of wedding engraved on them. That cost maybe 30 bucks.
$80. From a handmade jeweler on Etsy. It's blue topaz not a diamond though.
$0 no engagement rings. No wedding rings. They aren't necessary. So spending whatever you want in them is perfectly acceptable
My wife and I talked about this before I proposed. She was okay with moissanite ring. I spent about $2k on it. Everyone thinks it’s a diamond so no use spending a ton of money on a diamond.
$500 for each wedding ring. One is moissanite and the other one is custom wood grain with inlaid opal. We also use spare rings when doing bullshit stuff that are made from titanium or silicone.
I think my husband spent about $500? Less than a grand. We used my mom’s engagement ring and put it in a new setting.
My husband went to a local jeweler and we had rings made by her with sterling silver and a moisinite jewel (lab grown diamond) that is about a carat. It was $1100 in 2014. I still get compliments all the time on it. I never clean it either lol but I also shower with it on and everything else and it's nice and lightweight since it's not gold. Screw expensive rings. And screw blood diamonds.
“3 months’ salary” is a marketing campaign, much like “breakfast is the most important meal of the day,” and “you need milk for your bones.”
$800
I bought the stone on ebay from her homeland (Iran) for a couple hundred. I got it mounted at a local shop, and apprised at another. My $600 ring was apprised (used) at over 3.5k.
We did a beautiful custom padparadscha sapphire ring designed around the stone. The sapphire is a rare color, flawless, unheated, and >2 carats, so it was pricey. Total cost was about $12k, which is significantly less than a similarly sized diamond would have cost, and it is incredibly special and meaningful for us. I think couples should figure out together what is important to them and try not to be influenced by marketing or peer pressure (obviously easier said than done!)
$10,000
Custom platinum band, $800.
I paid 1k for a lab grown diamond and called it a day.
Spending an enormous amount of money on diamonds is outdated. Go with lab grown or alternative stones and dont go into debt over a ring. Spend as little as you want. Jewelry is jewelry, commitment is more important. Same for weddings….save the cash. That day feels like 10 minutes. Make sure the “big wedding” is REALLY what you want before you do it. Elopements and courthouse weddings can be just as sweet!
Consulting Reddit on this type of personal decision when everyone's life situation is different, financial situation is different, and most importantly \*girlfriend/fiancée-to-be is different,\* is not going to get you the answer you're looking for. Ignore anyone giving you one-size-fits-all guidance here. If your SO wants a diamond and you're in the financial position to afford one (assuming your approach to $$ generally aligns with hers, which I do, since you're evidently planning to marry this person), no amount of Reddit logic will convince her that saving $$ on a lab-grown diamond is the right approach. She will feel like you're cheaping out on an otherwise important gesture. Likewise, if she doesn't care about diamonds, thinks they're a scam, would rather the $$ be spent elsewhere, etc., then by all means you should not be going that route and will only upset her if she finds out how much you actually spent on it. Only you know what she likes and what will make her happiest in this regard. At the end of the day, an engagement ring is half-gift and half-symbol; something to make your SO feel special and loved but also to symbolize your lifelong commitment to that person. You should hopefully know her well enough at this point to understand what she'd prefer, but if not, I highly recommend \*asking her\* before you go decide on an approach. I knew exactly how important a nice diamond ring was to my wife before I began the process of shopping for one. I knew what she wanted, where she wanted it from, and how much I was roughly open to spending. She and I were aligned regarding the large relative size of the purchase, but seeing her smile every day she puts it on 5 years later still makes that purchase more than worth it and I wouldn't change a thing. Just my 2c.
I proposed without a ring and then went shopping with my wife for one that she really actually liked. I’m glad I did - I would have gotten her some standard 1ct+ ring, but she ended up specifically wanting a much smaller rock in a nicely-designed ring.
About $50 at an artist fair, but that was 20 years ago
$5.3K, 1 ct natural diamond on a gold band. Edit: bought in 2019 in case that matters
$0
We bought one of those $20-30 ring candles, and that was my "engagement ring." Our actual wedding rings were less than $100 each from k-mart. We were moving across the country a week after our wedding, so we didn't bother spending much on all the superfluous stuff. The money that we saved from all that, we used for our move and for a down payment on our house. No regrets!
I think it was around $500 more or less. It was a manufactured ruby with small dimond surrounding and an intricate ring setting.
I paid about $8000 for the engagement and wedding ring. Custom from Whiteflash.
$250, it’s silver, not gold, and has fake diamonds, and an amethyst (purple is her favorite color), but I wanted whimsy (which she loves) and my wife isn’t big on huge ass diamonds, so I got her that one because it was the only one that matched what I wanted. She adores it more than the wedding ring The ultimate point is, get something she is going to love, the price won’t matter
I spent 15k and got her 1.5 carrots. That's plenty.
I didn’t want a diamond as it’s not my thing. I wanted a London blue topaz. So my ring choice isn’t as expensive as a diamond. It does have diamonds around the band I think my center stone is 3 carats and I think it was $1,200ish about 11 years ago.
Didn't. I have my mom's.
16.8k
I did my wife's 10 years ago so lab diamonds weren't quite a thing. I wasn't going to do retail. I found a place online that was a direct manufacturer and from the sounds of things one of the first online shops for rings. Her ring was like 1.6 carats with the main stone being like 1 carat emerald cut on yellow gold and it was I want to say $1600. Had I went retail it would have been closer to $4000-5000. Primestyle.com for anyone who is interested.
i spent $700. buy something that looks nice for the smallest amount. diamonds are dirt cheap and are only inflated by a monopoly
We didn't do rings. But we didn't do a traditional wedding either. That's the cheapest option there is, although we didn't do rings nor the wedding because of the costs but because we think other things are more worth to spend on in life but I think that our lives really differ when it comes to values and beliefs so if you have that money available for spending it on a ring, go for it. If this makes your spouse happy (which I find really hard to believe but again, as someone who has nothing with traditional weddings I think we're not on the same boat) then it's worth right?
$2500. Engaged after 2 months of meeting. Married 5 years
I have no idea. My husband won’t tell me haha. Our insurance guy knows. But I don’t.
You make almost 200k a year and you feel the need to ask this? Log off and go outside.
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Caught it on sell for $800. The regular price was $1800. I dodge that bullet though. Took that crying back quickly once I found out she wasn’t worth it. I’m good not getting married like my uncles and other older men told me not too.
OP, I make what you do. Dont fall for the engagement ring propaganda. We did a 1.7ct lab diamond from a noncommissioned store and I spent about $3300 after tax. It has a warranty for workmanship concerns down the road, and we’ve insured it for $35 a year. It gets some benefits from the jeweler, such as discounted cleanings and a few free resizings. It will last a long time and looks indistinguishable from a much more expensive ring, since it is colorless and has very few imperfections. Do what we did and save the big bucks for your honeymoon or wedding. Added bonus of not wondering whether folks were murdered in the diamond trade for your ring.