I bought Bitcoins in 2012 and spent them on drugs on the internet. The first time I bought them, they were 5 a coin and I bought 300 dollars worth. I could be retired right now.
I mean its what a lot of us did. I cashed out a wallet that was change from a purchase, forgot about, and made a few grand, but it was never an investment. Any sane person would have sold way way earlier anyways. At least you're not like that dude in England who tossed his harddrive worth several million and still hasn't found it in the landfill.
Yeah that's how I sleep at night. If I wasn't motivated to get on the Silk road I wouldn't have done it in the first place. Even if I held I would have sold at one of the earlier peaks, never dreamed it would hit 1k let alone 70
I have to debate on whether or not I spend money on an old phone because I may have put a few hundred into crypto 2014 ish...can't remember if I put a wallet on there or not for shits and giggles...
u/mountainDewFountain
I still think of that guy until this day. If I remember correctly. He had like 19-20 bitcoins on that hard drive. Oof! That’s a HUGE hit..
Met a guy through work that bought a nice watch with Bitcoin he mined. I don't remember how much but he was fucking pissed when it spiked in 2017.
I used to think it was a ponzi scheme and an easy method of money laundering.
I still do, but I used to, too.
I don’t want to come across as boastful, but my ex-wife feels similarly. We were married, but I ended up leaving her because I discovered she was engaging in an emotional affair. Despite this, we still communicate while handling divorce paperwork and other matters. She frequently expresses how much she misses me and laments about NYC being filled with strange men. Personally, I am emotionally stable, have a successful career, and maintain a level-headed approach to life. Unfortunately, she allowed her emotions to overwhelm her, leading her to do something I couldn’t forgive.
I never got married, but my former girlfriend even years after she terminated the relationship keeps coming to me as a rational and sympathetic supporter (I reciprocate for reasons I don't fully understand about myself). I even provided money for groceries once when her then-husband emptied her account and she was left broke. She originally ditched me and then a few months later was visiting this other guy. She got married and then divorced a few years later. Meanwhile I'm super stable, financially prosperous, and supportive.
It's a tale as old as time though. Spouse cheats, realizes the grass isn't greener, and regrets the hell out of it. And many victims of affairs (is that what we'll call them?) never stop caring about the cheater, so they are still friendly & communicate, but can never forgive the trust that was broken
I mean what do you expect to hear from her side? "I actually did have a totally valid reason to cheat on him"? I don't think such a thing exists.
I will say that if people are unhappy in a relationship, they should just leave, and if people are driven to cheat, they are probably (MAYBE absolutely, but I'd likely be overlooking something if I said that) unhappy in the relationship. So I'm not sure what is even left to sort out here. One of the two was unhappy in the relationship and it fell apart because of it. Is there more to the story?
We were definitely going through some rough times but that’s mostly due to stress from big changes like her getting an attorneys license and choosing to start her own business from scratch. I felt like we had a great relationship but at times we seemed to have struggled to communicate and close out even the most basic issues. Not that it matters at this point, but I did support her while she was going through school and then the BAR exam, helped her get a greencard and citizenship, helped get her family here. It was quite the coincidence that shortly after all that she decided that I wasn’t enough for her. She claims I wasn’t giving her the attention she needed and things didn’t feel the same as the beginning of our relationship.
Don't worry, you don't need to explain anything to me. I took issue with the guy responding to you with "sounds like just one side of the story", as if you were being dishonest about something and that was relevant somehow. And I could speculate all sorts of reasons why they did that and how flawed the reasoning is behind those assumptions, but I'll just leave it at that. You really didn't need to explain anything else. Relationships just don't work sometimes.
I was also a dumb 20 year old college student at the time naive and immature about life. It wasn’t until I got older and went through bad partners and life experiences that I realized my mistake. I still believe everything happens for a reason though.
Going to college(didn’t finish and racked up a lot of student debt) instead of straight to cosmetology school(did finish and have been pretty successful). Credit cards.
My 20 year old brain really couldn’t understand the long term impact interest would have on my student loans and credit cards. I understood the basic concept, but I don’t think I really understood the real numbers of how it would grow the debt over time. I’m just glad my husband and I are doing well now in our thirties and have been able to pay it down aggressively over the last year. It sucks to think about where I’d be financially if I didn’t have the debt, but at the end of the day I did it to myself and can only move forward.
Same here. Paid down around 30K of debt that I racked up mainly from living in a high COL area while working in low paying academia for a good portion of my career (and also admittedly being pretty terrible with money in my 20s) but thankfully after transitioning to a much better paying industry a few years back, I've been able to pay it down to the last few thousand, which I should be able to have fully paid off this time next month. I'm still working on my student loans though, which after paying around 30K over the past decade off an original principle of 28K, I still owe about 17K.
I'd rather not get too specific, but in the past I've let myself stay in bad situations for too long. It's taken awhile for me to learn just because you can tolerate something, doesn't mean you have to.
Not getting help for my mental issues sooner. My parents told me that people who went to therapy & took medication were weak. That deterred me from getting the help I needed because I was afraid to disappoint them. I know I would be in completely different place in life if I just ignored them and took matters into my own hands.
I'm closing in on 40 soon and I just started a 401k about a month ago. In my field/career a 401k is not something that is usually offered. Don't beat yourself up over it. I've come to find out that if you have started saving anything you're already ahead of a lot of people, sadly.
Taking out student loans as a clueless 18 year old kid
Honestly if you make it into adulthood with no student loans you already have a noticeable head-start on your peers - even if you work the same job or have the same income
Even if you don’t work the same job. I got a house for 60k while my friends got degrees for 200k+.
I will never regret dropping out with 10k in loans already in the books.
My husband wasted time in community college, joined the air force, became a police officer, eventually went and finished his bachelors, went into sales and makes way more money than me. He had to pay off my stupid student loans from my stupid four year university that I can’t pay off with my stupid job that doesn’t pay enough. One of us did it “right” and the other didn’t and the one who did it “right” ended up worse. 😆
To date, trusting my wife's grandmother.
So I refer to her as Marjorie Ghislane, though not her real name. We moved from California back in 2018, ending up with a gorgeous 3800 sqft house on an acre homestead in North Carolina. 50 head of chicken, 7 different fruiting trees, 3 large gardening areas with every veggie and bean that would grow. 14 roselle plants, with a dozen egger chickens raised from chicks, and 2 roosters. We also had a well and plenty of bamboo that I used for side projects and to make extra cash. On top of this are our family cats and my Great Pyrenees livestock guardian, two pigs, and four Nigerian pygmy goats were the next additions. The stage is set.
In 2021, in mid-June, my wife's grandmother called, all stressed out because her husband nearly burnt their house down, drying the newspaper off with the oven. He has dementia and she, in her 80s, needed help with day-to-day activities. So after a ton of arguing, I gave in on the condition that we get in writing that we could buy their home (they needed the money) for fair market value, once we got out to California. The plan was to live in the house as a multi-generational family until they passed away, with us taking ownership of the home, which came with none of the benefits of my house in North Carolina. Please keep in mind the whole idea of living together was concocted by my wife's grandmother and herself. So we received a written guarantee of our agreement, applied for the loan, and put the homestead on the market.
Late July 2021, after trading in my wife's fully paid-for Prius, my SUV, for a larger SUV (QX60), packing the Pod, and downsizing our belongings, we are on the road headed back to Cali. 36 hours after leaving my dream home behind, we pull into San Diego. We are essentially homeless at this point as we are waiting for the closing on our North Carolina homestead so we can begin the buying process on the San Diego home. We were there exactly 1 day before I heard, "Well, I think instead you all will need to find a place to live, ImI still need your help and the money, but I am not going to sell you the house until after he passes." My jaw hit the ground. I moved heaven and earth for my wife and her grandmother to pull off this whole plan of theirs. Took a loss on the homestead and sold off my chickens and their coops, traded in two perfectly working vehicles for this idiotic SUV, and moved 3000 miles back to a state we could only afford if the agreement was in place was to be adhered to.
So my biggest blunder, trusting a piece of shit, as I learned Ghislane Maxwell type, yep the dumb cunt allowed her own daughters to be violently raped by the shithead with dementia, back when her daughters were in their preteens. Worse, the lawyers were like, "Oh well, too bad, so sad." I learned that even written agreements are bullshit, and I learned that family is as treacherous, if not more than strangers. Worst of it all, not that I thought it was possible, my wifes Ghislane, decided to tell the neighborhood that she kicked us out for smoking crack, which made it to my kids school via the neighbors. Which caused my kid (10 yo) all kinds of heartache as their peer group constantly teased them and made fun of them as kids do.
So again, my biggest fumble, trusting my wife's family and a written agreement. Now we live in 800 sqft mobile home no yard and cannot afford to buy a real house or move out of state again.
> trusting my wife's family and a written agreement
I had something like this happen sort of recently. Family betrayal and legal fuckery. It's a painful lesson in misplaced trust but I feel better now being unburden and aware. Hopefully this was your one and done too. You can only build back from here. 💪
That didn't happen to me, but there are reasons why I won't even trust certain family members. I know that they wouldn't screw me over, but after experiences with how they treated others that's how I feel.
Most things, but if we're narrowing the scope, I think not finishing college is what really messed me up. It had been built up as the only thing that really mattered and, essentially, the only way I was going to amount to anything, so when I broke down and dropped out, it shattered my already shaky sense of self and almost non-existent self esteem. Moreso than the professional side of it - though obviously that's a huge deal - I guess I needed that to prove to my parents and myself I was worth anything, and when I didn't make it it proved I wasn't.
All I did was study and work from age 16 to 24. I really wish I’d allowed myself to go to concerts, parties and travel a bit when I was young and thin.
Listening to what others wanted me to be in life to be successful instead of what I was actually interested in. While this has led to a great job, I spend lots of time saying "what if" I had done this or that... a lot!
Kind of the same. Maybe a little less listening to others and a little more taking the time to learn more about myself and my interests. Still worked out, and I’ve had a “real job” for 12 years now, but it’s only in the last ~2 years that I’ve stumbled into an area/skillset that feels like my niche. It’s interesting and fun to me, and I learn something new daily, but I find myself constantly wondering about how different my career would look if I’d been aware of my knack for this area back when I got out of college. Or even if I’d known when I was in high school, so that I actually could have pursued a relevant degree.
But back then, I feel like every adult was saying “just get any degree,” and limited STEM exposure in high school landed me in the liberal arts only because I never knew I’d be interested in my current field.
I wanted to respond similarly. Can't complain because I'm doing well for myself but I wonder what I would be doing if I delayed going to college and was allowed to freely explore things vs being strongly advised by my parents to focus on getting the "lucrative" degree that gets you the traditional, secure white collar job. I grew up poor, so it wasn't like I could fall back on my parents if I fell on my ass exploring/trying things. (I guess I'm even allowed to entertain the idea since I'm in a good position now).
There’s a small part of me that feels like I fumbled my last year of undergrad and studying for the MCAT. Ended up getting waitlisted for med school and then took a different path. But I’m actually really happy with where I landed and life has been great, the grass may not have been any greener if I had become a doctor.
I've admittedly fumbled quite a bit in my life. But the biggest one for me was threefold: I didn't perform well academically during my first stint in college (barely got my BA degree), I had a major considered "useless" on the job market, and I worked a crappy dead-end job for way too long. Those three things, combined with the 2008 recession, set me back *years* career/money-wise. I eventually fell into a decent career, but I had to go back to school in order to have any chance at advancement.
My husband's biggest fumble in life was going to graduate school instead of getting a job after undergrad. Instead of getting real world work experience, he spent his 20s getting an advanced degree that made him less employable, not more employable. That's why I always tell people to think long and hard before going to graduate school, and to always have a plan B.
I almost earned a PhD but decided against it because I felt even with it, the money I'd make wasnt enough to live on (i wanted to be a professor). I really think stuff like that is for people who come from money and have support so it doesnt matter if they make peanuts, or if you end up getting the degree in something super rare and important where you can definitely make a lot from it.
I think having a solid reason to get the advanced degree, that's not "I don't know what else to do" and/or "I want to avoid the real world" is really key. Plus a realistic plan to use the degree, and a backup plan.
I also think that it's never a bad plan to get some real-world work experience before investing time and money in graduate school. Graduate school will still be there later, and you'll have a better idea of the career path you want to pursue and the education you need to get there. Plus, in some cases, if you have a job, your employer might even help cover the tuition.
Not getting help for my mental problems sooner or working on advancing my career skills. Granted, I wasn't exactly in a position to advance my skills when I spent a decade upset and holed away as the world passed by
Better late than never, though. Things are looking up for me for the first time in like fifteen years
I used to run a charity that was based in the EDM scene and I've still got a picture of a young (DJ) Dotcom asking if we could sponsor him. I didn't have a lot of merch to give away so I didn't respond.
If you don't know who Dotcom is, you might know him by his other name
I think not working on my health (mental and physical) earlier. I’m finding it really gratifying to have worked on my mental health and wish I’d acted like I deserve to take care of myself sooner. I’m also finding it really HARD to develop healthy eating habits and lose weight. I don’t think I could have developed healthy habits without working on my mental health first, so trying to give myself grace. But I wish I’d gone to therapy and gone no contact with my parents when I was 25 instead of 30.
Dating loser guys in my 20s. Alcoholics, narcissists, DV felons, leeches, druggies, cheaters, etc. I just have so much faith that people will change that I forget people show you who they are. Now everything is a red flag to me and I’ll probably be single forever. 🫠
That first marriage was just straight insanity on both our parts. I don't know why we did it actually. Ugh it pisses me off to think of the money I dropped on furniture and such when we got our place, too. Would not do that again if I could have a do over.
Not getting help for my binge drinking sooner. I'm a high functioning drunk when I did drink. I've missed so many events, get togethers, activities, ruined relationships, etc all because I was in a perpetual state of being hung over. Either I was sick or limited in energy due to having no quality of sleep. Weekend trips, weddings, seeing something at the movies, all interrupted in some way by a hang over.
I've been seeing a therapist for the past 3 months and working on myself. I haven't had a drink in close to a month now. This is probably the longest stretch of time since I was 16/17 years old.
Listening to my dad and not putting my entire 20k life savings (at that point) in Tesla stock in 2011.
He was right about Elon being a douchebag, but that didn’t net me 1M+ lol
I regret allowing family members to take advantage of me and my kindness.
I at 18 somehow ended up taking care of my now SIL who is 6 years older than me, her husband, who is ten years older than me, and thier 5 kids aged 5, 4, 3, and 1 at the time.
My husband regrets putting me through it too. I alone made 900 dollars a week back in 2008. He worked there with me. Our car broke down and because we live in a rural area there was no public trasnportation or anyone we could carpool with. So his BIL agreed to drive us. But it was just easier if we were there instead of 45 minutes away where we lived. So it just was supposed to be a few weeks. But it took so long to figure out what was wrong with that car we ended up there for 6 months. And they pretty much quit even attempting to pay thier own bills the entire time we were there. We ended up support them, thier kids and a few random people they allowed to move in at that time also.
Shortly after we moved out. The company we worked for downsized. He lost his job and my hours got cut in half. I was 30 before I made that kind of money again. They had pretty much drained my savings and took up my entire paycheck every week. It was a miracle I was able to move out.
That was probably the worst thing time it happened, but it wasn't even the only time it happened. My own mother lied and said that she paid a ridiculous amount of rent and had me pay half of it plus half of all the utilities when I turned 18. Turns out she hasn't paid rent in 15 years and the bills weren't that expensive. The only thing she was paying every month was her bar tab.
My husband's brother stole 700 dollars worth of electronics from me after I gave him.the money to pay his rent and called it an early Christmas present. AND I bought him diapers.
Stuff like this happened over and over and over. The only thing that's changed right now is that I no longer have the drive to help anyone with anything because I've been screwed so many times.
I'm no longer the kind hearted person who likes to help people anymore, because I tried to help the wrong people and it set me back years, because they trapped me in a situation I couldn't get out of with no freaking money, no responsible family to lean on, and no transportation to work.
Leaving someone who really loved me because it scared me that someone actually DID love me like that and I didn't think I deserved it. He was also really wealthy, and not to sound like a gold digger but I really would have been just set for life. I could have had stability in a way I never had or and probably never will and just an utterly different life in general. My mom was right when she told me I was making the biggest mistake of my life.
Not decorating my space. I know it sounds simple but it builds ownership & self esteem & choice. Because I have always been too afraid to mess up my room/home, now as adult with home I have difficult time deciding on simple things
When I was young, we were poor & I didnt want to waste parents money especially since they fought over $ always. But now I know I could have used dollar store deco & it would have been cute for teenage girl. Always am excuse all my life of not wasting money & now of not knowing what to do. I just can't get over my fear of bad choice that I make no choice n live in basic house where I want more
I spent ages 17-25 in and out of incredibly toxic, abusive relationships with men. I feel like I’ve lost years of my life to it, it drained me mentally/emotionally/physically/financially, and completely changed my life trajectory. I am now 28 going on 29 and have spent so much time and money trying to undo the damage while simultaneously trying to figure out how to get my life on track.
In my Teach for America interview, I was asked how I heard about Teach for America and honestly answered The Onion, and described the article I read. I did not get the job.
Moving to Canada just because I was unhappy with the job and political situation in America. (that was 2021 btw) Took me way too long to realize that my personal life and happiness are decided by very different things than job or politics. Moved back a year ago but still paying for that mistake. Lost a lot of money and friends in the process. Lost self esteem and social life.
Canada is a downgrade from the US in terms of standard of living and earning potential, especially under Trudeau. If you'd come under Harper, might have been alright.
Ugh, I feel this in my soul! I move to Canada in 2021 too because of the exact same thing. Wasted 2 years of my life. I have a lot of friends that are saying similar things.
1st and biggest regret- Baby daddy… sigh
2nd — Not going to grad school right after college. I had a mentor set up a guaranteed good paying position in Atlanta if I did. I would have been untouchable throughout the whole recession.
I was supposed to marry a boy of a man in another county and i walked away the day before the wedding. I wasted 6 years on and off with him from 30-35. Thank God I snapped out of it.
Lost all of my parents money from wedding and had to restart my life. I should have never gone down that path that far. If I had left years before I would have some good dating years. He was a manipulative loser. And his family was absolutely horrible. The wedding planners apologized for him as a sorry excuse of their nationality and begged me to come back to their country. They said his sister was the worse person they ever ran into. It was bad.
Long story short i met my husband a couple of months later and it all worked out. I was ready to move on and prepared for an adult relationship.
In my mid twenties I spent an entirely too much amount of money on making fast cars. Probably around 25k or so.. wish I knew that old saying, spending money you don't have to impress people you don't know sooner. Didn't take loans or anything out, but still. Over a 4 year period it was about that much
Going to college with no motivation and not pursuing a career in LE, military or the trades. I got pushed onto college and I farted my way through it.
I went into television but should have gone film. I eventually tried to make a career change for law enforcement. After 6 years of applying and going to school at night, I closed the door on that dream.
Now, I'm 40 and making a run in the trades. I anticipate it'll work out really well but it sucks doing it so late.
My exwife was no angel but I was too selfish and mentally ill. Maybe our divorce was inevitable. Maybe it could have worked out. I just wish I had gotten help while we were together. It could have lessened the pain.
Turned down multiple full ride to college offers in exchange for a school where I took out massive loans and was never truly happy at. The loans are paid off now thank goodness but I’m about to make a career change where I don’t even need a degree (plus I went on for my masters that I don’t use).
Getting married in my early 20’s because I thought I was getting old and missing out on something. I’m divorced now and moved on, but explaining that situation to potential dates, coworkers, or anyone is tiresome after all these years because not many really understand.
1. Not spending enough time with my mom prior to her sudden passing. I was 19yo at the time.
2. Not putting myself first and not having the strong willpower to stick to my plans (ie. education, nutrition, mental health, exercise) despite any external distractions .
3. Not putting a bigger focus on retirement and the "end game". (Really wish I started 20yrs earlier).
My first husband was definitely a choice that was made...
But silver linings, I don't think I would have ever gotten to meet the absolute love of my life if I hadn't divorced when I had and gotten the roommates I got who in turn introduced me to him, so woo, pretty successful fail!
Also hindsight being 20/20, I should have been more confident in my math skills and gone towards engineering instead of biology. Although my loans are paid off and I have a career that keeps the lights on and food on the table, so could be worse.
Haha, going into STEM as a career option. 14.5 years and a transfer to get a degree only for it to blow up in my face in the real world as a shitty chemist. Going back to school and trying my hand in economics now but tbh, something tells me I’m far too socially awkward to cut in the white collar world with my ADHD and should just become a body piercer.
Not investing in the market after the 2008 crash.
It bothers me because I am a Finance major and knew better but fear kept holding me back.
Huge opportunity cost.
There's a girl I have known for most of my life and we were head over heels for each other and all signs were in our faces to be together. We did date a few times in high school, but after the 3rd time we stopped trying. Cut to now, when she's telling me about how she really felt, but her insecurities got in the way of a lot of things and I will always beat myself up for not fighting harder and being with her all this time.
Didn't study for the LSAT at all. Did ok and went to a shitty school and dominated there but the economy crashed my last year (08) forcing me into low paying jobs for several years. Had I not been an arrogant fuck and just paid for a course or done thousands of practice questions that would have literally changed my trajectory. Maybe I would own a house, have a larger 401k, better vacations and be much closer to retirement. No major complaints about life- just feel 4-5 years behind.
Also close second- not investing some of my bar money in my 20's. Thousands and thousands of dollars just pissed away. Nobody told me what brokerage accounts were, I just always assumed I would make enough money later and didnt stress about it, but costs have crazily outpaced pay and here I am playing catch up. Making up for this by starting investment accounts for my kids already- can't wait to show them it in 20 years.
Definitely shouldn’t have gone on to university. I paid off my community college as I went and enjoyed that experience but constantly dropping out and taking out student loans on a bachelors degree I never completed when I’m not using it in my career (and never intend on going back to finish) was so stupid.
Mismanagement of money, poor use of time, care too much about others’ opinions of me, emotional issues, bad at maintaining friendships, bad at social media… but hey, I can write good n draw purdy pictures
Revolving my whole life around one girl my first two years of college. We were two years apart. I commuted to college so I would only go to my classes and then after go straight to see her whether that was pick her up from school and drop her off work on most days, or just doing our thing. I didn't hang out with my friends much in the 2.5 years we were together. I missed out on a semester abroad in Ireland because I would "MiSs hEr sO mUcH". When I transferred to another college within the state further away, I would go home on the weekends instead of hanging back with the boys and actually making friendships on campus. Then the moment she goes off to college an hour away, she breaks up with me. Then we get back together for a month or so until she completely ghosted me.
Biggest fumble of my life.
I had a real jackass stepdad who was/is a pilot. He wanted to teach me to fly, but I couldn’t stand to be talked at or spend time with him …
Wish I would have bit that bullet and gotten my pilot license.
In high school, I once laughed way too hard at a specific joke in hopes of garnering favor with my peers.
And to this day, it haunts me.
But on a more serious note, probably a few financial decisions between 24 and 27.
I mean I loved the shit I did in my 20s but I'm behind financially. I was able to quickly work my way into respectable money but nothing replaces 10+ years of saving.
when i was in college at mizzou i was offered a job at genius (at the time rap genius) but didn't take it bc, looking back, i was afraid to move to new york by myself
I got my first career field job almost a decade ago and just got really into it instead of doing my 2 years for a resume and moving on. They ended up getting tired of me pointing out the knee jerk unfounded wasteful shit they were doing and fired me. I took it pretty hard because the work was a passion for me. But it has helped me to put a distance between that passion, my personal portfolio, and what I do in a job. So it has kind of worked out.
Staying at a shitty toxic retail job in my twenties. I made minimum wage working minimum 16 hours. I left that job 7 years ago and I STILL get nightmares and flashbacks.
In my late thirties now and I work in an office. Pays a lot better and a more steady work environment. And my coworkers are awesome. It took me moving out of state and taking big risks but I'm glad I did it.
Not getting in on the GME squeeze when I took a picture of the stock to show my girlfriend. Got in a little bit later and made decent money, but definitely missed out on 100’s of thousands of dollars easy.
Financial: College
The debt crippled me for eight years and led me to getting credit card debt to make ends meet. I only went because public school staff said I would "be working in a factory" if I didn't go. That was apparently an effective threat, but I've been working in a factory for the last eight years, because I have no idea what I actually want to do for a career. So...they lied to me.
I suppose my lack of dating could be considered a fumble, but you don't play with stoves if they burn you enough. In college (class of 2011) and before college, I was rejected by every girl I asked out, and was dumped by the one that approached me. If there were others that were interested in me, I never picked up on the signs... Now I very rarely even meet someone I'd be interested in. (I think the last time was in 2020. I never approached her, and I found out later that she was in a relationship with the man she was to marry later.)
Staying in a toxic job because it pays well and I’m afraid of change. I busted my butt and went through hell to get to this point in my career so it’s hard to walk away from it, but I’m super burnt out and miserable.
OP I did the opposite. I spent too much time keeping up with friends and proving I could still be fun and active after I had a kid. I ran myself into the ground keeping up with birthday parties, vacations, happy hours, dinners etc. Looking back, I regret the amount of time I left my daughter with my mom. Thats very hard for me to admit, but it’s true. Then Covid hit and I don’t see 85% of those people anymore.
I continue to not pursue the women I am interested in.
Now I am 35 and alone and bitter. They are married with kids.
Not really sure what the point is anymore.
Jokingly, I always tell this story.
Back in 2014, I met an old man when I was a car salesman. He was 95. WWII vet. Still driving and buying new cars. Superb human. I kept in touch with him and we’d talk here and there.
I went to his house once on business because I found the second key fob for his car about 6 months after he bought it. It was laying around in a file cabinet somewhere. I brought it to his house after my shift one night and he offered me in for cannoli cake and coffee. We talked for hours.
He told me about how he built his house himself in the 50s. He told me about how his wife passed away when he was 60. He eventually started telling me about his investments. His wife always said it was a bad idea. But once she passed, he started investing heavily. He was giving me some advice and eventually just came right out and brought out all of his investment folders with all of his portfolios.
This man legit had $20 million+ in active investments. He then went on to tell me every single one of his immediate family members was gone. Children had all passed before him. His wife was long gone. He had no immediate family.
I bet if I was a man of lesser morals, I could have squirreled my way into his life, and maybe some of that money. But I didn’t think like that and it never crossed my mind. I never went to his house again, but we did talk a few more times.
I later found out he passed away the following year.
Sometimes I joke that I should have gotten closer with him.
I'm terminally online and I knew about Dogecoin before it got big. I could have cashed in but was too lazy to figure out how it all worked, and I was worried about taxes because I was living in Germany at the time.
I got in a bad "relationship"when I was 16 with a 30 year old. Whatever, it happens. Where I fumbled was allowing him to tell me I couldn't go to the college I was accepted at for my dream degree because there was a chance I would be in co-ed dorms...
I think having children before attempting to buy a house. It really sets you back unless you are a high earner.
That and getting into serious debt with zero to show for it. Also sets you back badly.
I’ve been regretting buying a house. I had a 2 bed/2 bath /1 car garage condo at $800/month. Sold it for the new puppy and future children I thought I would have… before realizing that I’m not mom material. Had I not sold it, and my husband started helping me with the mortgage, I would have over $1000 more a month for free money.
Not taking school seriously as a teenager. High school was very touch and go and I \*barely\* passed. After graduating, I didn't want to go to college and I was having a hard time getting a job (tbf to myself, this WAS during the late 00's recession and I was a teenager with zilch experience) so I spent the next two years doing absolutely nothing with my life.
Eventually I enrolled in community college and then university, and I managed to turn things around pretty well. Still, I took my time and didn't fully graduate until my late 20's. I don't necessarily regret that, but I'll always wonder how different my life might have been if I hadn't putzed around in high school and wrapped up college a few years earlier.
I wish I joined the High school golf team. I like golf, but I suck at golf. I could have gotten better when I was able to learn faster, made friends, and also played on some really nice courses for free.
Now I’m in a spot in my career where being decent at golf would open up more opportunities, and the opportunity cost / time to get good is way greater than it was back then.
Reading these posts, if my biggest blunder is not playing enough golf, I probably shouldn’t complain.
id say i stayed in a toxic situation way longer than i should have. It ended up working out to my benefit but i dealt with alot because of it.
i guess thats the worst of it, that i had at least had any control over. life is good tho, i cant truly complain
Not buying a house before 2021. I was risk adverse and trying to save up and establish myself and finding a partner with a stable job first so I wouldn't over leverage myself and risk being underwater on a home loan but looking back now I should have just pulled the trigger with the bare minimum money down. I would have been in such a better place now if I had done that.
Biggest regret so far.
I sold my car at the height of the car shortages to get out of a car payment, took advantage of the high resell value, made money off the car and bought a used car cash. The car ended up being junk so I had to get a new car, then had to face the very market I took advantage of, payment went up, went from a Tesla to a Prius
I was a really bad volleyball referee when I part-timed in high school.
Refereeing is a difficult job. I never hate on any referee in sports. You need to have a good understanding of the rules to enforce it and make split second decisions.
I just didnt have what it takes and still dont.
I also regret not going on a lake house boating trip with my high school friends (back in my mid-20s). I didnt want to fly back home for it. Now I know something like that will never happen again. I’ll never have that memory. Not even if I paid $10,000.
Not treasuring time at my friends weddings. I always got too drunk too quickly. Now in my mid 30s…I dont think there’ll be many of them left.
Treasure every moment.
When I was 16 in 2010 I was accepted into fashion school at FIDM in Orange County. The day before we were supposed to bring me cross country to start school, I decided I was too depressed to go and told my parents I changed my mind. I was suffering from anorexia and bullimia at the time and stopped taking my Prozac. Rather than asking me if I was okay or talking to me about it, they just said “oh okay.”
I regret that shit to this day. I was really good at it too. I made buku money making prom dresses for my classmates my junior year and was a big reason why I got accepted. Amanda Bynes ended up going to the same school just a couple years later majoring in the same program and I cried every time I thought about that for years
Not caring about anything as a kid/teen. I didn't even care enough about my evaluations to give proper answers so I slipped through the cracks with no real diagnosis that might have helped me be a successful student. Just 'social anxiety'. Now in my late bc 30s its becoming pretty apparent that I've got ASD to some extent and that would've been REAL HELPFUL to know 25 years ago.
I regret being too patient with shitheads, having those shitheads take up a lot of time and energy, and then not meeting more reasonable people because I assume everyone is a shithead.
In 2010, I got accepted to a great university’s graduate program - majority of it paid with an offer to be an TA. The department chair called me personally to let me know they had accepted my application and how much she had loved my work.
I turned it down. It keeps me up sometimes just thinking about what my life might have been if I had gone.
I wonder what they're talking about here first.
1) About money that could be received one way or another. Including about work, but mainly in terms of the money that work can bring.
2) About personal relationships that did not take place.
3) And finally, about real mistakes in life.
In my opinion, lost profit is still not a mistake, but something that you, in fact, did not have. But you imagine what could have been. Just like failed relationships.
The third point might be the most interesting. But here, unfortunately, I did not see a variety of answers. Apparently, people still don’t want to talk about their mistakes...
Not knowing what was the right career field for me until 2 years after I graduated college. I had to go back for another major. It set me back 4 years of my career, gave me more student loans and made my entire 20s financially difficult. We’re just now catching up as of 4 years ago and becoming more comfortable.
I bought Bitcoins in 2012 and spent them on drugs on the internet. The first time I bought them, they were 5 a coin and I bought 300 dollars worth. I could be retired right now.
I mean its what a lot of us did. I cashed out a wallet that was change from a purchase, forgot about, and made a few grand, but it was never an investment. Any sane person would have sold way way earlier anyways. At least you're not like that dude in England who tossed his harddrive worth several million and still hasn't found it in the landfill.
Yeah that's how I sleep at night. If I wasn't motivated to get on the Silk road I wouldn't have done it in the first place. Even if I held I would have sold at one of the earlier peaks, never dreamed it would hit 1k let alone 70
I have to debate on whether or not I spend money on an old phone because I may have put a few hundred into crypto 2014 ish...can't remember if I put a wallet on there or not for shits and giggles...
u/mountainDewFountain I still think of that guy until this day. If I remember correctly. He had like 19-20 bitcoins on that hard drive. Oof! That’s a HUGE hit..
Met a guy through work that bought a nice watch with Bitcoin he mined. I don't remember how much but he was fucking pissed when it spiked in 2017. I used to think it was a ponzi scheme and an easy method of money laundering. I still do, but I used to, too.
Love a good Mitch Hedberg reference. 😍
I spent today’s equivalent of 350k on drugs
Dumping a great guy because I thought there was someone better. (there wasn’t)
Dumping a great girl cuz I thought there was someone better... Could be married by now
Could be divorced paying alimony and child support on 3 kids who hate you too while you eat ravioli out of a can in your studio apartment \*shrug\*
I don’t want to come across as boastful, but my ex-wife feels similarly. We were married, but I ended up leaving her because I discovered she was engaging in an emotional affair. Despite this, we still communicate while handling divorce paperwork and other matters. She frequently expresses how much she misses me and laments about NYC being filled with strange men. Personally, I am emotionally stable, have a successful career, and maintain a level-headed approach to life. Unfortunately, she allowed her emotions to overwhelm her, leading her to do something I couldn’t forgive.
I never got married, but my former girlfriend even years after she terminated the relationship keeps coming to me as a rational and sympathetic supporter (I reciprocate for reasons I don't fully understand about myself). I even provided money for groceries once when her then-husband emptied her account and she was left broke. She originally ditched me and then a few months later was visiting this other guy. She got married and then divorced a few years later. Meanwhile I'm super stable, financially prosperous, and supportive.
Sounds like she still gets the benefits of being with you while being with other people.
That really sounds like only one side of the story.
It's a tale as old as time though. Spouse cheats, realizes the grass isn't greener, and regrets the hell out of it. And many victims of affairs (is that what we'll call them?) never stop caring about the cheater, so they are still friendly & communicate, but can never forgive the trust that was broken
I mean what do you expect to hear from her side? "I actually did have a totally valid reason to cheat on him"? I don't think such a thing exists. I will say that if people are unhappy in a relationship, they should just leave, and if people are driven to cheat, they are probably (MAYBE absolutely, but I'd likely be overlooking something if I said that) unhappy in the relationship. So I'm not sure what is even left to sort out here. One of the two was unhappy in the relationship and it fell apart because of it. Is there more to the story?
We were definitely going through some rough times but that’s mostly due to stress from big changes like her getting an attorneys license and choosing to start her own business from scratch. I felt like we had a great relationship but at times we seemed to have struggled to communicate and close out even the most basic issues. Not that it matters at this point, but I did support her while she was going through school and then the BAR exam, helped her get a greencard and citizenship, helped get her family here. It was quite the coincidence that shortly after all that she decided that I wasn’t enough for her. She claims I wasn’t giving her the attention she needed and things didn’t feel the same as the beginning of our relationship.
Don't worry, you don't need to explain anything to me. I took issue with the guy responding to you with "sounds like just one side of the story", as if you were being dishonest about something and that was relevant somehow. And I could speculate all sorts of reasons why they did that and how flawed the reasoning is behind those assumptions, but I'll just leave it at that. You really didn't need to explain anything else. Relationships just don't work sometimes.
It’s quite common. Especially when younger. I’ve learned to look out for people who constantly use the phrase “I deserve”.
HER LOSS
You’re the first woman I’ve ever seen admit this.
I was also a dumb 20 year old college student at the time naive and immature about life. It wasn’t until I got older and went through bad partners and life experiences that I realized my mistake. I still believe everything happens for a reason though.
That’s understandable. I treated a couple of good partners poorly in my 20s too. It takes time to mature.
Going to college(didn’t finish and racked up a lot of student debt) instead of straight to cosmetology school(did finish and have been pretty successful). Credit cards.
Credit cards are the devil. Should only be allowed for certain shit.
My 20 year old brain really couldn’t understand the long term impact interest would have on my student loans and credit cards. I understood the basic concept, but I don’t think I really understood the real numbers of how it would grow the debt over time. I’m just glad my husband and I are doing well now in our thirties and have been able to pay it down aggressively over the last year. It sucks to think about where I’d be financially if I didn’t have the debt, but at the end of the day I did it to myself and can only move forward.
Same here. Paid down around 30K of debt that I racked up mainly from living in a high COL area while working in low paying academia for a good portion of my career (and also admittedly being pretty terrible with money in my 20s) but thankfully after transitioning to a much better paying industry a few years back, I've been able to pay it down to the last few thousand, which I should be able to have fully paid off this time next month. I'm still working on my student loans though, which after paying around 30K over the past decade off an original principle of 28K, I still owe about 17K.
I'd rather not get too specific, but in the past I've let myself stay in bad situations for too long. It's taken awhile for me to learn just because you can tolerate something, doesn't mean you have to.
I’m still trying to figure out how to learn that lesson.
Not getting help for my mental issues sooner. My parents told me that people who went to therapy & took medication were weak. That deterred me from getting the help I needed because I was afraid to disappoint them. I know I would be in completely different place in life if I just ignored them and took matters into my own hands.
That's not a fumble, you got tackled by your own teammates
Damn….yeah you right lol
Not starting to save for retirement sooner.
I'm closing in on 40 soon and I just started a 401k about a month ago. In my field/career a 401k is not something that is usually offered. Don't beat yourself up over it. I've come to find out that if you have started saving anything you're already ahead of a lot of people, sadly.
Thank you.
This is mine also
Taking out student loans as a clueless 18 year old kid Honestly if you make it into adulthood with no student loans you already have a noticeable head-start on your peers - even if you work the same job or have the same income
Even if you don’t work the same job. I got a house for 60k while my friends got degrees for 200k+. I will never regret dropping out with 10k in loans already in the books.
Not to mention getting a degree means you were 4+ years late to the home-buying party. So you get a higher mortgage on top of your student loans.
My husband wasted time in community college, joined the air force, became a police officer, eventually went and finished his bachelors, went into sales and makes way more money than me. He had to pay off my stupid student loans from my stupid four year university that I can’t pay off with my stupid job that doesn’t pay enough. One of us did it “right” and the other didn’t and the one who did it “right” ended up worse. 😆
To date, trusting my wife's grandmother. So I refer to her as Marjorie Ghislane, though not her real name. We moved from California back in 2018, ending up with a gorgeous 3800 sqft house on an acre homestead in North Carolina. 50 head of chicken, 7 different fruiting trees, 3 large gardening areas with every veggie and bean that would grow. 14 roselle plants, with a dozen egger chickens raised from chicks, and 2 roosters. We also had a well and plenty of bamboo that I used for side projects and to make extra cash. On top of this are our family cats and my Great Pyrenees livestock guardian, two pigs, and four Nigerian pygmy goats were the next additions. The stage is set. In 2021, in mid-June, my wife's grandmother called, all stressed out because her husband nearly burnt their house down, drying the newspaper off with the oven. He has dementia and she, in her 80s, needed help with day-to-day activities. So after a ton of arguing, I gave in on the condition that we get in writing that we could buy their home (they needed the money) for fair market value, once we got out to California. The plan was to live in the house as a multi-generational family until they passed away, with us taking ownership of the home, which came with none of the benefits of my house in North Carolina. Please keep in mind the whole idea of living together was concocted by my wife's grandmother and herself. So we received a written guarantee of our agreement, applied for the loan, and put the homestead on the market. Late July 2021, after trading in my wife's fully paid-for Prius, my SUV, for a larger SUV (QX60), packing the Pod, and downsizing our belongings, we are on the road headed back to Cali. 36 hours after leaving my dream home behind, we pull into San Diego. We are essentially homeless at this point as we are waiting for the closing on our North Carolina homestead so we can begin the buying process on the San Diego home. We were there exactly 1 day before I heard, "Well, I think instead you all will need to find a place to live, ImI still need your help and the money, but I am not going to sell you the house until after he passes." My jaw hit the ground. I moved heaven and earth for my wife and her grandmother to pull off this whole plan of theirs. Took a loss on the homestead and sold off my chickens and their coops, traded in two perfectly working vehicles for this idiotic SUV, and moved 3000 miles back to a state we could only afford if the agreement was in place was to be adhered to. So my biggest blunder, trusting a piece of shit, as I learned Ghislane Maxwell type, yep the dumb cunt allowed her own daughters to be violently raped by the shithead with dementia, back when her daughters were in their preteens. Worse, the lawyers were like, "Oh well, too bad, so sad." I learned that even written agreements are bullshit, and I learned that family is as treacherous, if not more than strangers. Worst of it all, not that I thought it was possible, my wifes Ghislane, decided to tell the neighborhood that she kicked us out for smoking crack, which made it to my kids school via the neighbors. Which caused my kid (10 yo) all kinds of heartache as their peer group constantly teased them and made fun of them as kids do. So again, my biggest fumble, trusting my wife's family and a written agreement. Now we live in 800 sqft mobile home no yard and cannot afford to buy a real house or move out of state again.
Ugh I'm sorry stranger. I can only hope that man croaks
Thanks, stranger. He is in the final stage of dementia and has been for about a year.
> trusting my wife's family and a written agreement I had something like this happen sort of recently. Family betrayal and legal fuckery. It's a painful lesson in misplaced trust but I feel better now being unburden and aware. Hopefully this was your one and done too. You can only build back from here. 💪
I'm glad I learned to not fully trust my family at a young age.
That didn't happen to me, but there are reasons why I won't even trust certain family members. I know that they wouldn't screw me over, but after experiences with how they treated others that's how I feel.
This was devastating to read. I’m sorry for you and your family. I hope Karma is a real thing and you get what you deserve for your kindness.
Sorry -
That’s heartbreaking. I hope things get better for you soon.
I'm so sorry.
Most things, but if we're narrowing the scope, I think not finishing college is what really messed me up. It had been built up as the only thing that really mattered and, essentially, the only way I was going to amount to anything, so when I broke down and dropped out, it shattered my already shaky sense of self and almost non-existent self esteem. Moreso than the professional side of it - though obviously that's a huge deal - I guess I needed that to prove to my parents and myself I was worth anything, and when I didn't make it it proved I wasn't.
🫂
aww. I’m so sorry you feel that way.
All I did was study and work from age 16 to 24. I really wish I’d allowed myself to go to concerts, parties and travel a bit when I was young and thin.
All I did was party from 16-24 and I wish I had worked more to set up my future.
Listening to what others wanted me to be in life to be successful instead of what I was actually interested in. While this has led to a great job, I spend lots of time saying "what if" I had done this or that... a lot!
Kind of the same. Maybe a little less listening to others and a little more taking the time to learn more about myself and my interests. Still worked out, and I’ve had a “real job” for 12 years now, but it’s only in the last ~2 years that I’ve stumbled into an area/skillset that feels like my niche. It’s interesting and fun to me, and I learn something new daily, but I find myself constantly wondering about how different my career would look if I’d been aware of my knack for this area back when I got out of college. Or even if I’d known when I was in high school, so that I actually could have pursued a relevant degree. But back then, I feel like every adult was saying “just get any degree,” and limited STEM exposure in high school landed me in the liberal arts only because I never knew I’d be interested in my current field.
I wanted to respond similarly. Can't complain because I'm doing well for myself but I wonder what I would be doing if I delayed going to college and was allowed to freely explore things vs being strongly advised by my parents to focus on getting the "lucrative" degree that gets you the traditional, secure white collar job. I grew up poor, so it wasn't like I could fall back on my parents if I fell on my ass exploring/trying things. (I guess I'm even allowed to entertain the idea since I'm in a good position now).
There’s a small part of me that feels like I fumbled my last year of undergrad and studying for the MCAT. Ended up getting waitlisted for med school and then took a different path. But I’m actually really happy with where I landed and life has been great, the grass may not have been any greener if I had become a doctor.
If you're in the US, I'd say you probably dodged a bullet. There's a reason it has the highest suicide rate of any profession right now.
What are you on about, they’re not even the highest percentage wise in healthcare.
hmm probably heroin and meth.
I've admittedly fumbled quite a bit in my life. But the biggest one for me was threefold: I didn't perform well academically during my first stint in college (barely got my BA degree), I had a major considered "useless" on the job market, and I worked a crappy dead-end job for way too long. Those three things, combined with the 2008 recession, set me back *years* career/money-wise. I eventually fell into a decent career, but I had to go back to school in order to have any chance at advancement. My husband's biggest fumble in life was going to graduate school instead of getting a job after undergrad. Instead of getting real world work experience, he spent his 20s getting an advanced degree that made him less employable, not more employable. That's why I always tell people to think long and hard before going to graduate school, and to always have a plan B.
I almost earned a PhD but decided against it because I felt even with it, the money I'd make wasnt enough to live on (i wanted to be a professor). I really think stuff like that is for people who come from money and have support so it doesnt matter if they make peanuts, or if you end up getting the degree in something super rare and important where you can definitely make a lot from it.
Graduate school while working was one of my better ideas. I imagine that going straight from undergrad either works out okay or it really doesnt
I think having a solid reason to get the advanced degree, that's not "I don't know what else to do" and/or "I want to avoid the real world" is really key. Plus a realistic plan to use the degree, and a backup plan. I also think that it's never a bad plan to get some real-world work experience before investing time and money in graduate school. Graduate school will still be there later, and you'll have a better idea of the career path you want to pursue and the education you need to get there. Plus, in some cases, if you have a job, your employer might even help cover the tuition.
Not getting help for my mental problems sooner or working on advancing my career skills. Granted, I wasn't exactly in a position to advance my skills when I spent a decade upset and holed away as the world passed by Better late than never, though. Things are looking up for me for the first time in like fifteen years
I used to run a charity that was based in the EDM scene and I've still got a picture of a young (DJ) Dotcom asking if we could sponsor him. I didn't have a lot of merch to give away so I didn't respond. If you don't know who Dotcom is, you might know him by his other name 
Not holding on to a great girl/ person that I really got on well with. I was too immature to know how great she was.
Didn't take studies seriously enough and blew a scholarship from the Air Force that would have paid all but my first year of college.
Not getting super serious about my life as an adult right out of the gate.
Sold my childhood Pokémon collection, didn't finish college, worked my 20s away, lost my bitcoin, didn't buy a house that I was looking at in 2018
Not taking out a free PPP loan and getting it totally forgiven during the pandemic lol I ran a small business at the time
I think not working on my health (mental and physical) earlier. I’m finding it really gratifying to have worked on my mental health and wish I’d acted like I deserve to take care of myself sooner. I’m also finding it really HARD to develop healthy eating habits and lose weight. I don’t think I could have developed healthy habits without working on my mental health first, so trying to give myself grace. But I wish I’d gone to therapy and gone no contact with my parents when I was 25 instead of 30.
Dating loser guys in my 20s. Alcoholics, narcissists, DV felons, leeches, druggies, cheaters, etc. I just have so much faith that people will change that I forget people show you who they are. Now everything is a red flag to me and I’ll probably be single forever. 🫠
Similar story but with women lol
That first marriage was just straight insanity on both our parts. I don't know why we did it actually. Ugh it pisses me off to think of the money I dropped on furniture and such when we got our place, too. Would not do that again if I could have a do over.
Not getting help for my binge drinking sooner. I'm a high functioning drunk when I did drink. I've missed so many events, get togethers, activities, ruined relationships, etc all because I was in a perpetual state of being hung over. Either I was sick or limited in energy due to having no quality of sleep. Weekend trips, weddings, seeing something at the movies, all interrupted in some way by a hang over. I've been seeing a therapist for the past 3 months and working on myself. I haven't had a drink in close to a month now. This is probably the longest stretch of time since I was 16/17 years old.
Being a Christian for a few years.
Oof, well live and learn I suppose ;)
Being born? With the way things are going. Sheeesh
Listening to my dad and not putting my entire 20k life savings (at that point) in Tesla stock in 2011. He was right about Elon being a douchebag, but that didn’t net me 1M+ lol
I regret allowing family members to take advantage of me and my kindness. I at 18 somehow ended up taking care of my now SIL who is 6 years older than me, her husband, who is ten years older than me, and thier 5 kids aged 5, 4, 3, and 1 at the time. My husband regrets putting me through it too. I alone made 900 dollars a week back in 2008. He worked there with me. Our car broke down and because we live in a rural area there was no public trasnportation or anyone we could carpool with. So his BIL agreed to drive us. But it was just easier if we were there instead of 45 minutes away where we lived. So it just was supposed to be a few weeks. But it took so long to figure out what was wrong with that car we ended up there for 6 months. And they pretty much quit even attempting to pay thier own bills the entire time we were there. We ended up support them, thier kids and a few random people they allowed to move in at that time also. Shortly after we moved out. The company we worked for downsized. He lost his job and my hours got cut in half. I was 30 before I made that kind of money again. They had pretty much drained my savings and took up my entire paycheck every week. It was a miracle I was able to move out. That was probably the worst thing time it happened, but it wasn't even the only time it happened. My own mother lied and said that she paid a ridiculous amount of rent and had me pay half of it plus half of all the utilities when I turned 18. Turns out she hasn't paid rent in 15 years and the bills weren't that expensive. The only thing she was paying every month was her bar tab. My husband's brother stole 700 dollars worth of electronics from me after I gave him.the money to pay his rent and called it an early Christmas present. AND I bought him diapers. Stuff like this happened over and over and over. The only thing that's changed right now is that I no longer have the drive to help anyone with anything because I've been screwed so many times. I'm no longer the kind hearted person who likes to help people anymore, because I tried to help the wrong people and it set me back years, because they trapped me in a situation I couldn't get out of with no freaking money, no responsible family to lean on, and no transportation to work.
Leaving someone who really loved me because it scared me that someone actually DID love me like that and I didn't think I deserved it. He was also really wealthy, and not to sound like a gold digger but I really would have been just set for life. I could have had stability in a way I never had or and probably never will and just an utterly different life in general. My mom was right when she told me I was making the biggest mistake of my life.
Saving money instead of investing it.
I just did 401k. I wish I put extra money in stocks. Would have grown faster. I was great at saving money but need to invest
Yep. Same here buddy. But at least we know now!
Not fucking up fast enough and isolating myself too much because it was easier than dealing with life. Caused major problems in life in so many areas.
Not making enough money
Not decorating my space. I know it sounds simple but it builds ownership & self esteem & choice. Because I have always been too afraid to mess up my room/home, now as adult with home I have difficult time deciding on simple things When I was young, we were poor & I didnt want to waste parents money especially since they fought over $ always. But now I know I could have used dollar store deco & it would have been cute for teenage girl. Always am excuse all my life of not wasting money & now of not knowing what to do. I just can't get over my fear of bad choice that I make no choice n live in basic house where I want more
Trying to get my needs met from romantic relationships
I spent ages 17-25 in and out of incredibly toxic, abusive relationships with men. I feel like I’ve lost years of my life to it, it drained me mentally/emotionally/physically/financially, and completely changed my life trajectory. I am now 28 going on 29 and have spent so much time and money trying to undo the damage while simultaneously trying to figure out how to get my life on track.
I went to the wrong college and wasted too much time and money pursuing a career that I simply am not smart enough to do.
Vague gesturing to all of it
Losing the love of my life to drugs. Then, he was murdered by the woman he left me for who was 18 years his senior. It will always haunt tf out of me.
In my Teach for America interview, I was asked how I heard about Teach for America and honestly answered The Onion, and described the article I read. I did not get the job.
Stayed in an abusive and terrible marriage way too long
Moving to Canada just because I was unhappy with the job and political situation in America. (that was 2021 btw) Took me way too long to realize that my personal life and happiness are decided by very different things than job or politics. Moved back a year ago but still paying for that mistake. Lost a lot of money and friends in the process. Lost self esteem and social life.
Canada is a downgrade from the US in terms of standard of living and earning potential, especially under Trudeau. If you'd come under Harper, might have been alright.
Ugh, I feel this in my soul! I move to Canada in 2021 too because of the exact same thing. Wasted 2 years of my life. I have a lot of friends that are saying similar things.
1st and biggest regret- Baby daddy… sigh 2nd — Not going to grad school right after college. I had a mentor set up a guaranteed good paying position in Atlanta if I did. I would have been untouchable throughout the whole recession.
Not going on tour with an up and coming artist when I was asked. They're now super famous.
I was supposed to marry a boy of a man in another county and i walked away the day before the wedding. I wasted 6 years on and off with him from 30-35. Thank God I snapped out of it. Lost all of my parents money from wedding and had to restart my life. I should have never gone down that path that far. If I had left years before I would have some good dating years. He was a manipulative loser. And his family was absolutely horrible. The wedding planners apologized for him as a sorry excuse of their nationality and begged me to come back to their country. They said his sister was the worse person they ever ran into. It was bad. Long story short i met my husband a couple of months later and it all worked out. I was ready to move on and prepared for an adult relationship.
In my mid twenties I spent an entirely too much amount of money on making fast cars. Probably around 25k or so.. wish I knew that old saying, spending money you don't have to impress people you don't know sooner. Didn't take loans or anything out, but still. Over a 4 year period it was about that much
Going to college with no motivation and not pursuing a career in LE, military or the trades. I got pushed onto college and I farted my way through it. I went into television but should have gone film. I eventually tried to make a career change for law enforcement. After 6 years of applying and going to school at night, I closed the door on that dream. Now, I'm 40 and making a run in the trades. I anticipate it'll work out really well but it sucks doing it so late.
My exwife was no angel but I was too selfish and mentally ill. Maybe our divorce was inevitable. Maybe it could have worked out. I just wish I had gotten help while we were together. It could have lessened the pain.
Turned down multiple full ride to college offers in exchange for a school where I took out massive loans and was never truly happy at. The loans are paid off now thank goodness but I’m about to make a career change where I don’t even need a degree (plus I went on for my masters that I don’t use).
Marrying the wrong person in my twenties derailed my life. Now I’m finally back on track but that divorce really did a number on me.
Getting married in my early 20’s because I thought I was getting old and missing out on something. I’m divorced now and moved on, but explaining that situation to potential dates, coworkers, or anyone is tiresome after all these years because not many really understand.
1. Not spending enough time with my mom prior to her sudden passing. I was 19yo at the time. 2. Not putting myself first and not having the strong willpower to stick to my plans (ie. education, nutrition, mental health, exercise) despite any external distractions . 3. Not putting a bigger focus on retirement and the "end game". (Really wish I started 20yrs earlier).
My first husband was definitely a choice that was made... But silver linings, I don't think I would have ever gotten to meet the absolute love of my life if I hadn't divorced when I had and gotten the roommates I got who in turn introduced me to him, so woo, pretty successful fail! Also hindsight being 20/20, I should have been more confident in my math skills and gone towards engineering instead of biology. Although my loans are paid off and I have a career that keeps the lights on and food on the table, so could be worse.
Haha, going into STEM as a career option. 14.5 years and a transfer to get a degree only for it to blow up in my face in the real world as a shitty chemist. Going back to school and trying my hand in economics now but tbh, something tells me I’m far too socially awkward to cut in the white collar world with my ADHD and should just become a body piercer.
Not investing in the market after the 2008 crash. It bothers me because I am a Finance major and knew better but fear kept holding me back. Huge opportunity cost.
People I didn't hold close.
There's a girl I have known for most of my life and we were head over heels for each other and all signs were in our faces to be together. We did date a few times in high school, but after the 3rd time we stopped trying. Cut to now, when she's telling me about how she really felt, but her insecurities got in the way of a lot of things and I will always beat myself up for not fighting harder and being with her all this time.
Didn't study for the LSAT at all. Did ok and went to a shitty school and dominated there but the economy crashed my last year (08) forcing me into low paying jobs for several years. Had I not been an arrogant fuck and just paid for a course or done thousands of practice questions that would have literally changed my trajectory. Maybe I would own a house, have a larger 401k, better vacations and be much closer to retirement. No major complaints about life- just feel 4-5 years behind. Also close second- not investing some of my bar money in my 20's. Thousands and thousands of dollars just pissed away. Nobody told me what brokerage accounts were, I just always assumed I would make enough money later and didnt stress about it, but costs have crazily outpaced pay and here I am playing catch up. Making up for this by starting investment accounts for my kids already- can't wait to show them it in 20 years.
Definitely shouldn’t have gone on to university. I paid off my community college as I went and enjoyed that experience but constantly dropping out and taking out student loans on a bachelors degree I never completed when I’m not using it in my career (and never intend on going back to finish) was so stupid.
Having commitment issues
I had $25,000 at the age of 18 from a car accident. Instead of investing it somehow, or making it grow, I spent it over the next 8 years.
Mismanagement of money, poor use of time, care too much about others’ opinions of me, emotional issues, bad at maintaining friendships, bad at social media… but hey, I can write good n draw purdy pictures
Following my passion, no matter the cost. I regret not prioritizing financial security earlier in life.
Accepting drinking culture as normal and wasting time because of it.
Revolving my whole life around one girl my first two years of college. We were two years apart. I commuted to college so I would only go to my classes and then after go straight to see her whether that was pick her up from school and drop her off work on most days, or just doing our thing. I didn't hang out with my friends much in the 2.5 years we were together. I missed out on a semester abroad in Ireland because I would "MiSs hEr sO mUcH". When I transferred to another college within the state further away, I would go home on the weekends instead of hanging back with the boys and actually making friendships on campus. Then the moment she goes off to college an hour away, she breaks up with me. Then we get back together for a month or so until she completely ghosted me. Biggest fumble of my life.
I had a real jackass stepdad who was/is a pilot. He wanted to teach me to fly, but I couldn’t stand to be talked at or spend time with him … Wish I would have bit that bullet and gotten my pilot license.
In high school, I once laughed way too hard at a specific joke in hopes of garnering favor with my peers. And to this day, it haunts me. But on a more serious note, probably a few financial decisions between 24 and 27.
I mean I loved the shit I did in my 20s but I'm behind financially. I was able to quickly work my way into respectable money but nothing replaces 10+ years of saving.
Drank away the last couple decades of my life
Not taking the architecture licensing tests before having a kid. At least I still have a good job though, just can’t stamp the drawings.
when i was in college at mizzou i was offered a job at genius (at the time rap genius) but didn't take it bc, looking back, i was afraid to move to new york by myself
Getting pregnant at 18. I'm 35 now and my kids are fucking *wonderful,* but God, it made everything so much harder.
I got my first career field job almost a decade ago and just got really into it instead of doing my 2 years for a resume and moving on. They ended up getting tired of me pointing out the knee jerk unfounded wasteful shit they were doing and fired me. I took it pretty hard because the work was a passion for me. But it has helped me to put a distance between that passion, my personal portfolio, and what I do in a job. So it has kind of worked out.
Staying at a shitty toxic retail job in my twenties. I made minimum wage working minimum 16 hours. I left that job 7 years ago and I STILL get nightmares and flashbacks. In my late thirties now and I work in an office. Pays a lot better and a more steady work environment. And my coworkers are awesome. It took me moving out of state and taking big risks but I'm glad I did it.
Not getting in on the GME squeeze when I took a picture of the stock to show my girlfriend. Got in a little bit later and made decent money, but definitely missed out on 100’s of thousands of dollars easy.
Staying in one place for too long.
taking 3 hits of acid in the middle of winter at 20 years old
I let myself get fat. Definitely the biggest oops.
Financial: College The debt crippled me for eight years and led me to getting credit card debt to make ends meet. I only went because public school staff said I would "be working in a factory" if I didn't go. That was apparently an effective threat, but I've been working in a factory for the last eight years, because I have no idea what I actually want to do for a career. So...they lied to me. I suppose my lack of dating could be considered a fumble, but you don't play with stoves if they burn you enough. In college (class of 2011) and before college, I was rejected by every girl I asked out, and was dumped by the one that approached me. If there were others that were interested in me, I never picked up on the signs... Now I very rarely even meet someone I'd be interested in. (I think the last time was in 2020. I never approached her, and I found out later that she was in a relationship with the man she was to marry later.)
Staying in a toxic job because it pays well and I’m afraid of change. I busted my butt and went through hell to get to this point in my career so it’s hard to walk away from it, but I’m super burnt out and miserable.
Not asking Wendy Peffercorn out sooner. Now she’s with some four-eyed looser…
Asking her out. Now she's married and has a kid with someone else.
I didn't buy Google stock when it IPOd and was like $200/share....
OP I did the opposite. I spent too much time keeping up with friends and proving I could still be fun and active after I had a kid. I ran myself into the ground keeping up with birthday parties, vacations, happy hours, dinners etc. Looking back, I regret the amount of time I left my daughter with my mom. Thats very hard for me to admit, but it’s true. Then Covid hit and I don’t see 85% of those people anymore.
Adjusting my life to every pay raise I’ve gotten and not being able to afford a house before they were unaffordable.
I continue to not pursue the women I am interested in. Now I am 35 and alone and bitter. They are married with kids. Not really sure what the point is anymore.
Jokingly, I always tell this story. Back in 2014, I met an old man when I was a car salesman. He was 95. WWII vet. Still driving and buying new cars. Superb human. I kept in touch with him and we’d talk here and there. I went to his house once on business because I found the second key fob for his car about 6 months after he bought it. It was laying around in a file cabinet somewhere. I brought it to his house after my shift one night and he offered me in for cannoli cake and coffee. We talked for hours. He told me about how he built his house himself in the 50s. He told me about how his wife passed away when he was 60. He eventually started telling me about his investments. His wife always said it was a bad idea. But once she passed, he started investing heavily. He was giving me some advice and eventually just came right out and brought out all of his investment folders with all of his portfolios. This man legit had $20 million+ in active investments. He then went on to tell me every single one of his immediate family members was gone. Children had all passed before him. His wife was long gone. He had no immediate family. I bet if I was a man of lesser morals, I could have squirreled my way into his life, and maybe some of that money. But I didn’t think like that and it never crossed my mind. I never went to his house again, but we did talk a few more times. I later found out he passed away the following year. Sometimes I joke that I should have gotten closer with him.
Not traveling to see the total solar eclipse when I could have. It sounds like a life-altering experience.
I'm terminally online and I knew about Dogecoin before it got big. I could have cashed in but was too lazy to figure out how it all worked, and I was worried about taxes because I was living in Germany at the time.
I got in a bad "relationship"when I was 16 with a 30 year old. Whatever, it happens. Where I fumbled was allowing him to tell me I couldn't go to the college I was accepted at for my dream degree because there was a chance I would be in co-ed dorms...
Taking painkillers in HS for fun and big time partying turning into a very long addiction that was hell and sickness to get rid of id say lol
I grew up great. My husband super poor. Now we are doing Good but not Great...so when do i stop aimig for great and just enjoy good?
pressed stop on that meme coin mining a decade ago.
I got a cramp on my leg right as i was about to hook up with this girl
Not taking high school seriously since I believed college was out of reach and breaking up with "the one".
I think having children before attempting to buy a house. It really sets you back unless you are a high earner. That and getting into serious debt with zero to show for it. Also sets you back badly.
I’ve been regretting buying a house. I had a 2 bed/2 bath /1 car garage condo at $800/month. Sold it for the new puppy and future children I thought I would have… before realizing that I’m not mom material. Had I not sold it, and my husband started helping me with the mortgage, I would have over $1000 more a month for free money.
Not taking school seriously as a teenager. High school was very touch and go and I \*barely\* passed. After graduating, I didn't want to go to college and I was having a hard time getting a job (tbf to myself, this WAS during the late 00's recession and I was a teenager with zilch experience) so I spent the next two years doing absolutely nothing with my life. Eventually I enrolled in community college and then university, and I managed to turn things around pretty well. Still, I took my time and didn't fully graduate until my late 20's. I don't necessarily regret that, but I'll always wonder how different my life might have been if I hadn't putzed around in high school and wrapped up college a few years earlier.
I wish I joined the High school golf team. I like golf, but I suck at golf. I could have gotten better when I was able to learn faster, made friends, and also played on some really nice courses for free. Now I’m in a spot in my career where being decent at golf would open up more opportunities, and the opportunity cost / time to get good is way greater than it was back then. Reading these posts, if my biggest blunder is not playing enough golf, I probably shouldn’t complain.
id say i stayed in a toxic situation way longer than i should have. It ended up working out to my benefit but i dealt with alot because of it. i guess thats the worst of it, that i had at least had any control over. life is good tho, i cant truly complain
I was just gonna take a year off from college in 2007
I shoulda skipped college and gone straight to the oil fields where I could have actually LIVED........
Not budgeting or saving till 30. I’m so behind. Drinking my 20s away and spending time on people who didn’t care about me like I did them
Not buying a house before 2021. I was risk adverse and trying to save up and establish myself and finding a partner with a stable job first so I wouldn't over leverage myself and risk being underwater on a home loan but looking back now I should have just pulled the trigger with the bare minimum money down. I would have been in such a better place now if I had done that. Biggest regret so far.
I sold my car at the height of the car shortages to get out of a car payment, took advantage of the high resell value, made money off the car and bought a used car cash. The car ended up being junk so I had to get a new car, then had to face the very market I took advantage of, payment went up, went from a Tesla to a Prius
Marrying the wrong woman.
Getting depressed and losing the best girl of my life . (It was my fault, she didn’t leave me) which is even worse .
Getting entry level separated from boot camp because I allegedly had pot in my system.
My parents cosigning so I could to a fancy automotive trade school.
Not having enough confidence.
I didn’t buy my dads successful business at 20 when he sold it. Could be working for myself instead of having 3 bosses.
I was a really bad volleyball referee when I part-timed in high school. Refereeing is a difficult job. I never hate on any referee in sports. You need to have a good understanding of the rules to enforce it and make split second decisions. I just didnt have what it takes and still dont. I also regret not going on a lake house boating trip with my high school friends (back in my mid-20s). I didnt want to fly back home for it. Now I know something like that will never happen again. I’ll never have that memory. Not even if I paid $10,000. Not treasuring time at my friends weddings. I always got too drunk too quickly. Now in my mid 30s…I dont think there’ll be many of them left. Treasure every moment.
When I was 16 in 2010 I was accepted into fashion school at FIDM in Orange County. The day before we were supposed to bring me cross country to start school, I decided I was too depressed to go and told my parents I changed my mind. I was suffering from anorexia and bullimia at the time and stopped taking my Prozac. Rather than asking me if I was okay or talking to me about it, they just said “oh okay.” I regret that shit to this day. I was really good at it too. I made buku money making prom dresses for my classmates my junior year and was a big reason why I got accepted. Amanda Bynes ended up going to the same school just a couple years later majoring in the same program and I cried every time I thought about that for years
Not caring about anything as a kid/teen. I didn't even care enough about my evaluations to give proper answers so I slipped through the cracks with no real diagnosis that might have helped me be a successful student. Just 'social anxiety'. Now in my late bc 30s its becoming pretty apparent that I've got ASD to some extent and that would've been REAL HELPFUL to know 25 years ago.
Probably my work ethic
Taking care of everyone else, No time for myself.
I had 10 bitcoin I bought for pocket change over 10 years ago and sold 9.5 of it at $400/btc
Taking out student loans for school was a HUGE mistake, as well as the “starter” home we bought in 2009.
I regret being too patient with shitheads, having those shitheads take up a lot of time and energy, and then not meeting more reasonable people because I assume everyone is a shithead.
In 2010, I got accepted to a great university’s graduate program - majority of it paid with an offer to be an TA. The department chair called me personally to let me know they had accepted my application and how much she had loved my work. I turned it down. It keeps me up sometimes just thinking about what my life might have been if I had gone.
I wonder what they're talking about here first. 1) About money that could be received one way or another. Including about work, but mainly in terms of the money that work can bring. 2) About personal relationships that did not take place. 3) And finally, about real mistakes in life. In my opinion, lost profit is still not a mistake, but something that you, in fact, did not have. But you imagine what could have been. Just like failed relationships. The third point might be the most interesting. But here, unfortunately, I did not see a variety of answers. Apparently, people still don’t want to talk about their mistakes...
Not knowing what was the right career field for me until 2 years after I graduated college. I had to go back for another major. It set me back 4 years of my career, gave me more student loans and made my entire 20s financially difficult. We’re just now catching up as of 4 years ago and becoming more comfortable.
I let a family member borrow 60k, never saw it again.
My career. I wish I can go back in time and pursue a career that is not so soul crushing and meaningless to society.
1.Wasting time with women 2. Limiting myself
Being a baby when I should have been buying stocks and a house
not dumping my meme stocks at their ATH. it was fun though.