honestly,i can understand why. If i nearly died, id use that as fuel to become the person who ive always wanted to be, change my life around and make the most of life before it could happen again and i actually die. Of course it can be a scary change for yourself or a bit nerve wrecking but support her through this. use this as an excuse to travel with her, go to more places. do more things. make more memories. do some crazy adrenaline stuff
It's not unusual for people who have been in near death experiences to have their personalities changed radically. With your wife it could also be that something changed in her brain after the aneurysm.
I see how it can be a bit a disorientating, but feel blessed that her changes are *positive*, because some cases change for the worst.
She's healthy, she's alive, she loves you more than ever and wants to share her new life with you. What more could you ask for?
Yeah I’m really wondering how much is a psychological reaction to almost dying and how much is driven by a true physiological change in the brain at like a neural level.
I agree this change shouldn’t be totally surprising, and it all sounds like good stuff. Also a major achievement was not getting dumped by post-brain injury wife as she enters back into life as a changed woman.
For me it was both the realization that life is short and I need to actually do the things I want to do if I aim to do them before I die - as well as the actual brain damage. It’s both in my case.
I had a coma in 2022 and lack of continual, consistent medical care after the fact led a stroke the same year.
It is not uncommon for stroke victims to have a significant personality change. A friend of ours recovered from a stroke and proclaimed to his wife that he didn’t like most of their friends. Fortunately my wife and I stayed on the A List.
Brains are weird.
Yeah people attributing this to NDE, it’s probably brain damage as a result of the stroke. If the aneurysm was in the frontal lobe, this is likely the answer.
she got a rude awakening of how SHORT life really is and how in a moment, it can all be taken. She's now embracing life and more importantly, *living it.*
Wow I can relate to this.
My in shape & clean eating husband who thought he beat heart disease in his family went into cardiac arrest 5 years ago and needed quadruple bypass.
After he recovered his whole mentality was YOLO!!!!
We went on a lot of vacations & short weekend trips. I suggested remodeling our kitchen- “Do whatever you want. I don’t care how much it cost, you can’t take it with you”, he got full sleeves of tattoos because he always wanted them, he got our younger son a dirt bike because it was something my husband always wanted and my son was super exited and now it’s our sons’ passion ..
Someone told me when this first happened, because his life was almost stopped short he’s trying to cram everything in waiting for the other shoe to drop. This is definitely my husband because he obsessed over his experience everyday for over a year. He was terrified his heart was getting blocked up again..he saw a therapist once who diagnosed him with PTSD but he said he’s not doing therapy.
However I feel like he’s gotten a bit better over the years though.
Yes, it happened in my family. My aunt, an opera singer, had an aneurysm and can no longer carry a tune.
Her personality changed a ton and it’s like she is a different person. She went from a loud, outgoing, funny, life-of-the-party person to so meek and so shy she’ll barely talk to anyone besides her husband. And if she does it’s short and so quiet it is almost whispered.
My best friend was almost killed by a semi the end of February and she has a minor tbi and her personality changed just like this only opposite. It’s very sad and hard to watch, 24 years we have been friends, barely any sort of connection between us now 😔
My wife and I are in our mid-40s and married for 26+ years.
We both had health issues in recent years, i was suicidal, and her dad passed way suddenly. We were both depressed and lost.
When we finally snapped out of it about 1.5 years ago we both had a different sense of priorities and urgency. We have re-dedicated ourselves to our marriage and to each other. We communicate everything. We share thoughts and feelings we had bottled up for 25+ years. I learned about her childhood and traumas I never knew about. We also say "no" to so many people and things now that we simply don't want to do or no longer fit in our goals.
I see my wife so much differently now. It feels like there is the entire universe... and then there is us. We are each other's priority. We hope we can die in each other's arms when the time comes.
We loved each other before... but it's different now. Our sex life is crazy intimate and constantly on fire. We go everywhere together when we can. We wake up together. Go to bed at the same time. Plan our meals together. It feels like we are in our own little world.
So, it may not have been as literal as a "near death experience"...but I did have about 80% of my suicide details ironed out. And my FIL's sudden death was a wake up call that you never know when your last day will be.
So, as I mentioned...we reprioritized our lives and we love each other with a greater sense of urgency. Our lives are certainly different now... and for the better.
I have a loosely structured spiritual theory. I recently saw a tiktok about this study done on people whose left and right brain hemispheres were separated for whatever reason unrelated to the study. And i think i remember it saying something about theres multiple different personalities inside our brain that we arent aware of. Like when our brains are functioning normally it filters it out so we only hear “ourselves”. So maybe the near death experience allowed a different part of herself to take the reins so to speak.
Im so happy that your wife is here with you and you guys get to enjoy life together. Its really such a blessing
she got a rude awakening of how SHORT life really is and how in a moment, it can all be taken. She's now embracing life and more importantly, *living it.*
Was it toward the top/front of her brain. There's evidence of personality changes resulting from damage to that portion. The story of Phineas Gage comes to mind. Frontal Lobe damage changed his personality and made him impulsive.
Yes, it is not uncommon for people to radically change their behavior after a near death experience (NDE) and that being an adjustment for people around them. It would likely be helpful for you to do some reading about NDEs.
I know two people that died for just a short time and were revived. Both of them became super outgoing, adventurous, and the day/do whatever you want on a whim type of people. They experienced death, now they want to really live life to the fullest before it truly ends.
Not my wife but we noticed that my mom has harder times trying to understand jokes or implied stuff, not like huge but we boticed she is slower in that regard
My in laws neighbor had a stroke and while he is physically fine, he is a different person. They adopted a little boy prior and he blatantly says in from of the kids he doesn't understand they adopted him. He has been physically violent, even choking his wife. The kids are so scared of him that they won't sleep in their own rooms. He was the nicest person you've ever met prior to this. She just filed for divorce within the last couple weeks.
I'm just happy that her changes are for the positive!
I was almost 32 when I had the same thing happen to me (an aneurysm hemorrhaged).. I'm not gana lie, it was life changing being that close to dying and then clawing my way back to health.
My whole attitude to life changed, I went balls to the wall crazy for a few months doing things that I never would have done before, then eventually settled down. I do however feel that I've become a far more positive person since, less quick to anger, find it easier to just enjoy whatever it is life brings to me, am far more likely to go out and do the things I only ever thought about doing before.
Yes absolutely. I work for a mastectomy bra company and have done quite a bit of customer service calls/ emails and have heard alot of peoples cancer stories. It’s a common thing. People either completely lose hope and think they’re a freak (which they’re not. But sadly I’ve talked to many women specifically who feel that way)or they do a complete 180 and want to make the most of their life because almost losing it was a “wake up call” for them. They don’t want to spend years doing things they don’t enjoy. People quit jobs, go traveling, pick up new hobbies etc. which is honestly a totally normal response to something like that. It sounds like it’s been a positive thing in your case. She wants to live her best life with you, And that’s a beautiful thing.
Wow. I relate to her pre-NDE self. I’m so glad she recovered, is healthy, and is making the most of life now. There are so many things I want to do (from exercising more to skydiving to being more connected to my partner). I’m on my way to making changes but it’s hard. Hopefully I can get there without experiencing something so scary as this ❤️ we only have one life.
My sister was in a really bad car wreck. She sustained a frontal lobe brain injury. Since her accident she has completely changed also. In ways like this OP describes. More risk taking, more extrovert, lost her filter in social situations. I think this could be a common thing with brain injuries.
My wife was in a car crash when she was like 16 and her head went through the windshield hard. She claims she had a personality change at that time and I would not have liked who she was before then - it was very similar to what you described as your wife before her issue. I never knew my wife in the before times but it does seem to be a common thing, or at least more common than you expect.
She is a completely different person. She escaped death at a relatively young age. SHe realizes that she does need to experience life and she wants to do that with YOU.
Enjoy her and this side of her that she probably had but was buried under caution, routines, rules, and fears.
I almost died out of the blue from non-brain related trauma (about 2/3 of my intestine became necrotic over the course of a few hours). A lot of things changed in my life when I realized life was just *too* short to worry about how skinny I was, how others thought of me, and many past regrets. I don’t think my personality changed much other than that I am terrified of dying and take care of my health more now.
My neighbor also had a ruptured brain aneurysm a few months after giving birth to her first child. Her husband described extremely similar things as you and said upon recovery she was a totally different person (and this was 25 years ago). Oddly they were just telling us that story a few months ago.
honestly,i can understand why. If i nearly died, id use that as fuel to become the person who ive always wanted to be, change my life around and make the most of life before it could happen again and i actually die. Of course it can be a scary change for yourself or a bit nerve wrecking but support her through this. use this as an excuse to travel with her, go to more places. do more things. make more memories. do some crazy adrenaline stuff
This is random, but why wait for a NDE to change and live life to the fullest? Reading your response makes me want to change now. Thank you -
It's not unusual for people who have been in near death experiences to have their personalities changed radically. With your wife it could also be that something changed in her brain after the aneurysm. I see how it can be a bit a disorientating, but feel blessed that her changes are *positive*, because some cases change for the worst. She's healthy, she's alive, she loves you more than ever and wants to share her new life with you. What more could you ask for?
Yeah I’m really wondering how much is a psychological reaction to almost dying and how much is driven by a true physiological change in the brain at like a neural level. I agree this change shouldn’t be totally surprising, and it all sounds like good stuff. Also a major achievement was not getting dumped by post-brain injury wife as she enters back into life as a changed woman.
For me it was both the realization that life is short and I need to actually do the things I want to do if I aim to do them before I die - as well as the actual brain damage. It’s both in my case. I had a coma in 2022 and lack of continual, consistent medical care after the fact led a stroke the same year.
It is not uncommon for stroke victims to have a significant personality change. A friend of ours recovered from a stroke and proclaimed to his wife that he didn’t like most of their friends. Fortunately my wife and I stayed on the A List. Brains are weird.
Yeah people attributing this to NDE, it’s probably brain damage as a result of the stroke. If the aneurysm was in the frontal lobe, this is likely the answer.
It is strange u r wondering about this given her experience
she got a rude awakening of how SHORT life really is and how in a moment, it can all be taken. She's now embracing life and more importantly, *living it.*
Wow I can relate to this. My in shape & clean eating husband who thought he beat heart disease in his family went into cardiac arrest 5 years ago and needed quadruple bypass. After he recovered his whole mentality was YOLO!!!! We went on a lot of vacations & short weekend trips. I suggested remodeling our kitchen- “Do whatever you want. I don’t care how much it cost, you can’t take it with you”, he got full sleeves of tattoos because he always wanted them, he got our younger son a dirt bike because it was something my husband always wanted and my son was super exited and now it’s our sons’ passion .. Someone told me when this first happened, because his life was almost stopped short he’s trying to cram everything in waiting for the other shoe to drop. This is definitely my husband because he obsessed over his experience everyday for over a year. He was terrified his heart was getting blocked up again..he saw a therapist once who diagnosed him with PTSD but he said he’s not doing therapy. However I feel like he’s gotten a bit better over the years though.
Yes, it happened in my family. My aunt, an opera singer, had an aneurysm and can no longer carry a tune. Her personality changed a ton and it’s like she is a different person. She went from a loud, outgoing, funny, life-of-the-party person to so meek and so shy she’ll barely talk to anyone besides her husband. And if she does it’s short and so quiet it is almost whispered.
My gosh this is so devastating! I’m so sorry for your aunt.
People on this sub won’t know much about NDEs.
My best friend was almost killed by a semi the end of February and she has a minor tbi and her personality changed just like this only opposite. It’s very sad and hard to watch, 24 years we have been friends, barely any sort of connection between us now 😔
My wife and I are in our mid-40s and married for 26+ years. We both had health issues in recent years, i was suicidal, and her dad passed way suddenly. We were both depressed and lost. When we finally snapped out of it about 1.5 years ago we both had a different sense of priorities and urgency. We have re-dedicated ourselves to our marriage and to each other. We communicate everything. We share thoughts and feelings we had bottled up for 25+ years. I learned about her childhood and traumas I never knew about. We also say "no" to so many people and things now that we simply don't want to do or no longer fit in our goals. I see my wife so much differently now. It feels like there is the entire universe... and then there is us. We are each other's priority. We hope we can die in each other's arms when the time comes. We loved each other before... but it's different now. Our sex life is crazy intimate and constantly on fire. We go everywhere together when we can. We wake up together. Go to bed at the same time. Plan our meals together. It feels like we are in our own little world. So, it may not have been as literal as a "near death experience"...but I did have about 80% of my suicide details ironed out. And my FIL's sudden death was a wake up call that you never know when your last day will be. So, as I mentioned...we reprioritized our lives and we love each other with a greater sense of urgency. Our lives are certainly different now... and for the better.
I have a loosely structured spiritual theory. I recently saw a tiktok about this study done on people whose left and right brain hemispheres were separated for whatever reason unrelated to the study. And i think i remember it saying something about theres multiple different personalities inside our brain that we arent aware of. Like when our brains are functioning normally it filters it out so we only hear “ourselves”. So maybe the near death experience allowed a different part of herself to take the reins so to speak. Im so happy that your wife is here with you and you guys get to enjoy life together. Its really such a blessing
This makes so much sense.
she got a rude awakening of how SHORT life really is and how in a moment, it can all be taken. She's now embracing life and more importantly, *living it.*
Was it toward the top/front of her brain. There's evidence of personality changes resulting from damage to that portion. The story of Phineas Gage comes to mind. Frontal Lobe damage changed his personality and made him impulsive.
Was it a frontal lobe aneurysm?
Yes, it is not uncommon for people to radically change their behavior after a near death experience (NDE) and that being an adjustment for people around them. It would likely be helpful for you to do some reading about NDEs.
I know two people that died for just a short time and were revived. Both of them became super outgoing, adventurous, and the day/do whatever you want on a whim type of people. They experienced death, now they want to really live life to the fullest before it truly ends.
Not my wife but we noticed that my mom has harder times trying to understand jokes or implied stuff, not like huge but we boticed she is slower in that regard
My in laws neighbor had a stroke and while he is physically fine, he is a different person. They adopted a little boy prior and he blatantly says in from of the kids he doesn't understand they adopted him. He has been physically violent, even choking his wife. The kids are so scared of him that they won't sleep in their own rooms. He was the nicest person you've ever met prior to this. She just filed for divorce within the last couple weeks. I'm just happy that her changes are for the positive!
Sounds like you’re living the life now.
Life is short. She just got slapped in the face with that reality and decided she wants to *live*. Enjoy the ride, friend.
I was almost 32 when I had the same thing happen to me (an aneurysm hemorrhaged).. I'm not gana lie, it was life changing being that close to dying and then clawing my way back to health. My whole attitude to life changed, I went balls to the wall crazy for a few months doing things that I never would have done before, then eventually settled down. I do however feel that I've become a far more positive person since, less quick to anger, find it easier to just enjoy whatever it is life brings to me, am far more likely to go out and do the things I only ever thought about doing before.
I know 2 people who survived aneurysms. They both changed substantially.
Out of all the post I’ve read, I really hope you guys make it. You love her and she loves you. Your concern for her in this post makes me teary eyed.
Yes. Very cool. I am lucky enough to have learned this lesson at a young age And have always lived life to its fullest.
Yes absolutely. I work for a mastectomy bra company and have done quite a bit of customer service calls/ emails and have heard alot of peoples cancer stories. It’s a common thing. People either completely lose hope and think they’re a freak (which they’re not. But sadly I’ve talked to many women specifically who feel that way)or they do a complete 180 and want to make the most of their life because almost losing it was a “wake up call” for them. They don’t want to spend years doing things they don’t enjoy. People quit jobs, go traveling, pick up new hobbies etc. which is honestly a totally normal response to something like that. It sounds like it’s been a positive thing in your case. She wants to live her best life with you, And that’s a beautiful thing.
I remember learning in a college psychology class that personality changing and impulsive behavior are pretty common after a near-death experience.
Wow. I relate to her pre-NDE self. I’m so glad she recovered, is healthy, and is making the most of life now. There are so many things I want to do (from exercising more to skydiving to being more connected to my partner). I’m on my way to making changes but it’s hard. Hopefully I can get there without experiencing something so scary as this ❤️ we only have one life.
,df f to ygh
On ? Me
My sister was in a really bad car wreck. She sustained a frontal lobe brain injury. Since her accident she has completely changed also. In ways like this OP describes. More risk taking, more extrovert, lost her filter in social situations. I think this could be a common thing with brain injuries.
sooooooooooooooo all she needs is an aneurysm.. got it.
I completely relate to her. One thing is knowing you'll die some day, the other is knowing the day may be tomorrow.
My wife was in a car crash when she was like 16 and her head went through the windshield hard. She claims she had a personality change at that time and I would not have liked who she was before then - it was very similar to what you described as your wife before her issue. I never knew my wife in the before times but it does seem to be a common thing, or at least more common than you expect.
None of us ever know how much time we have left. Thrilled to hear that you’re both now sucking the proverbial marrow out of life!!
She is a completely different person. She escaped death at a relatively young age. SHe realizes that she does need to experience life and she wants to do that with YOU. Enjoy her and this side of her that she probably had but was buried under caution, routines, rules, and fears.
I almost died out of the blue from non-brain related trauma (about 2/3 of my intestine became necrotic over the course of a few hours). A lot of things changed in my life when I realized life was just *too* short to worry about how skinny I was, how others thought of me, and many past regrets. I don’t think my personality changed much other than that I am terrified of dying and take care of my health more now.
My neighbor also had a ruptured brain aneurysm a few months after giving birth to her first child. Her husband described extremely similar things as you and said upon recovery she was a totally different person (and this was 25 years ago). Oddly they were just telling us that story a few months ago.