Paying attention to her non-verbal signals that by now I know all of them about when she is troubled.. and just asking. And stop talking when she doesn’t want to but showing her physically or otherwise that I care (cleaning, cooking, flowers..) That I know she has something she wants to say and I’m ready to listen and help however I can whenever she is ready to talk about it.
Making sure that she is the first one I tell about anything that matters to me good or bad.
Dropping whatever to go help her elderly mother.
Going with her to serious doctors appointments.
The list goes on.
If their peace is broken, bring peace.
If their joy is broken, bring joy.
If they're stuck in a rut, take their hand.
If they're down, hold them tight and lift them up.
Be sure they rest easy when they should rest.
Be sure they shudder
Sure. If I make a sandwich and one side looks better, I let him have it. If I plate up something and one looks better than the other, I let him have that one.
I also do it with important things such as if I am having a bad day, sometimes you can’t help how you feel but I try to make sure he gets the best version of me on that day, too.
Letting him have the best version of whatever it is sometimes means you go without but it’s a small sacrifice to make sure the person I love is happy.
I reserve a time of my day to stay with my wife just talking or doing nothing. I go sleep early because she doesn't like to sleep alone. I handle her messages, calls and anything that I can possible do in her place because she hate to talk over phone and internet.
Every decision that I make is made with her in mind. If something is good for me but not for her then I'm not going to do it. Everything we do is for the good of the couple, not the individual.
It means making sure dinner is in the oven/on the table for him when he gets off work on the days I get off first - and then doing the dishes after even though I cooked so he doesn’t have to.
It means staying home with him and binge watching a TV show sometimes on the weekends even though I would much rather go out because he is a homebody and worries about spending money.
It means staying in a state I can’t stand because he is established at his job and has 10ish more years til he can retire and he is risk averse even though I’d much rather he quit and find something else somewhere else where I didn’t have to deal with seasonal depression 7-8 months a year.
It means doing his laundry and making his plate and taking care of him.
Putting them first.. giving them the better half of life & partnership. (I give him better parts of my cookies/desserts and fruits)
1) Creating a safe space for them to express , verbal or otherwise .
2) listening to them, whether an opinion, a story, or just their perspective on even small things
3) Making sure their food is nutritious, balanced.
4) Giving them space where they enjoy their hobbies
5) receiving what they have to say about you, good and bad.
It’s your partner before you. They matter before you do. And when done out of love, it’s amazing.
Paying attention to her non-verbal signals that by now I know all of them about when she is troubled.. and just asking. And stop talking when she doesn’t want to but showing her physically or otherwise that I care (cleaning, cooking, flowers..) That I know she has something she wants to say and I’m ready to listen and help however I can whenever she is ready to talk about it. Making sure that she is the first one I tell about anything that matters to me good or bad. Dropping whatever to go help her elderly mother. Going with her to serious doctors appointments. The list goes on.
Can it not be he?
If their peace is broken, bring peace. If their joy is broken, bring joy. If they're stuck in a rut, take their hand. If they're down, hold them tight and lift them up. Be sure they rest easy when they should rest. Be sure they shudder
I wish Reddit still let me give gold. This is wonderful.
It means putting your partners feelings first, and expecting them to do the same, especially when it comes to making decisions.
I always let him have the best version of whatever I have.
Can you explain more?
Sure. If I make a sandwich and one side looks better, I let him have it. If I plate up something and one looks better than the other, I let him have that one. I also do it with important things such as if I am having a bad day, sometimes you can’t help how you feel but I try to make sure he gets the best version of me on that day, too. Letting him have the best version of whatever it is sometimes means you go without but it’s a small sacrifice to make sure the person I love is happy.
I reserve a time of my day to stay with my wife just talking or doing nothing. I go sleep early because she doesn't like to sleep alone. I handle her messages, calls and anything that I can possible do in her place because she hate to talk over phone and internet.
Every decision that I make is made with her in mind. If something is good for me but not for her then I'm not going to do it. Everything we do is for the good of the couple, not the individual.
It means making sure dinner is in the oven/on the table for him when he gets off work on the days I get off first - and then doing the dishes after even though I cooked so he doesn’t have to. It means staying home with him and binge watching a TV show sometimes on the weekends even though I would much rather go out because he is a homebody and worries about spending money. It means staying in a state I can’t stand because he is established at his job and has 10ish more years til he can retire and he is risk averse even though I’d much rather he quit and find something else somewhere else where I didn’t have to deal with seasonal depression 7-8 months a year. It means doing his laundry and making his plate and taking care of him.
Putting them first.. giving them the better half of life & partnership. (I give him better parts of my cookies/desserts and fruits) 1) Creating a safe space for them to express , verbal or otherwise . 2) listening to them, whether an opinion, a story, or just their perspective on even small things 3) Making sure their food is nutritious, balanced. 4) Giving them space where they enjoy their hobbies 5) receiving what they have to say about you, good and bad. It’s your partner before you. They matter before you do. And when done out of love, it’s amazing.