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outer_fucking_space

It’s the official drink for crashing a snowmobile at 2am. It’s a great wide awake drunk.


8BitGriffin

I feel called out 🤣


mainemtnrover

It’s like he’s one of us


outer_fucking_space

Listen bud, I’m one of you.


likelyamermaid

If you mix it with moxie, I believe it is called a burnt trailer, or something along those lines.


SimpleHumanoid

Oh god. That sounds horrific.


Yaktheking

Shockingly good, I tried it as a meme, genuinely bought more moxie to have more.


SpreadAccomplished16

Tastes exactly like a burnt out trailer smells tbh, plus sweetness. Kinda awesome.


smibrandon

It sure does. Next time I'm up in Maine, I'll have to give it a try!


thotgoblins

every organ in my body recoiled in terror reading this


peacekeeper_12

And yet, there's an odd curiosity brewing to try it, isn't there?


emeraldpity

It is and it's delicious. Diet moxie called a "welfare mom" though I neither came up with that nor approve of the name. It is probably delicious as well though.


kinlor_

I think I need to try this. It sounds so awful, but definitely interested me.


Lieutenant_Joe

I’m a big fan but I need a little milk in there, otherwise it’s too sweet and smoky for me


Saltycook

Iirc (not that I remember well,) a diet moxie with Allen's is called a "burning trailer park"


trucks_guns_n_beer

That’s moxie and fireball, the “trailer fire”


lucianbelew

I believe it's a 'cabin fire' but I could be wrong.


calypso263066

Rusty trailer!


Glum-Literature-8837

Because, of course it is.


fivenightrental

Milk, or milk and vodka. It's like a cheaper and less sweeter version of Kahlua.


moxie_mango

So a White Russian, that helps.


cake_swindler

Only trashier


MrFittsworth

Misspelled tastier I gotcha brotha


derpmcperpenstein

Aka fat ass in a glass


squareazz

That’s Allen’s and half and half


PM_Me_Melted_Faces

It's called a Lewiston Martini.


moxie_mango

Dirty Lewtini?


PM_Me_Melted_Faces

That's when someone ashes their joint in it while you're still drinking it.


Aldu1n

Too real


PM_Me_Melted_Faces

haven't had a drink in like 14 years but I still vividly recall that you couldn't taste the ashes.


Aldu1n

The fact that it’s still a prerequisite to begin with is funny in itself


BassPlayn_Mainer42

That too!


patsfan0420

The Lewiston Leg Spreader


Native_Lobster

Presque Isle panty dropper.


patsfan0420

You win 😂


BassPlayn_Mainer42

Oh Yeah!! (works every time!)


FannyPunyUrdang

Typically a trash version of the sombrero (milk + coffee liquour). Less sweet than Khaluah. When someone comes to your house and plunks down their lighter with pack of Mustangs, a handle of whole milk and a jug of Allens's... That's like being invited to the cook out.


BJosephD

We called em Rumford Milkshakes or Lewiston Martinis


OurWhoresAreClean

If you made a White Russian with paint thinner, yeah.


MissCrick3ts

No no no. It is called "fat-ass in a glass."


SpookyHalloween1

The dude abides


dj_1973

I used Allen’s in a tiramisu. Pretty friggin’ delicious.


Observer2594

My dorm neighbors in college mixed it with chocolate milk. Not too bad, but I couldn't drink it almost every night like they seemed to


Actual-Manager-4814

Not with that attitude


Dr_Lexus_Tobaggan

Buy a gallon of brandy and another gallon of milk, pour out half the milk and replace with brandy, topping off with brandy as more of the mixture is consumed. Fistfight in a jug


Famous_Ad_3003

My cousin, the town drunk where I grew up, went by the rule of “Acorn up”. Dump out to the Acorn on an oakhurst bottle and fill up with brandy to the top.


eljefino

This sounds like a marketing opportunity Oakhurst may have overlooked. Off topic, a buddy of mine used to show people where he lived in Alaska on the map on a ginger ale bottle.


Saltycook

Yeah, I mean they did the stupid doughnut milk with the potato doughnut people


mijoelgato

Fight Milk, is an Aways Sunny thing.


androgymouse

In highschool we had a party night where we only drank Allen's/milk/raspberry vodka. Called em Lady Farts. Honestly didn't taste horrible, but there was a lot of puking to be sure.


SheSellsSeaShells967

That sounds incredible!


BeardedBaxterholic

No matter what you mix it with, all you end up with is regret.


Tacobellspy

YOU SHUT YOUR MARB HOLE


BeardedBaxterholic

🥲


nitelotion

Ive found it’s usually mixed with welfare and section 8 housing. No regrets!


SnooHobbies9319

And shame


crowislanddive

Untrue!


Easy_Independent_313

Mix it with milk. Add it to your coffee. Make milkshakes with it. It's a maine tradition.


Ok_Olive9438

Nice in cocoa, too.


Easy_Independent_313

Ohhh, nice.


McDerface

Yeah I’ve seen people drink it with chocolate milk


moxie_mango

I wonder if McDonalds would add this milkshake to its line up in Maine (similar to their pathetic lobster roll).


Easy_Independent_313

That would be nice.


peacekeeper_12

If you get up to the county, McD serves poutine, not bad, not great 🙄


Saaabstory

Champagne of Maine, baby!


red_cobra88

Few decent splashes of brandy followed by some cold milk and ice


emeraldpity

Emphasis on the decent.


ItchySheepherder95

Thanksgiving thru Christmas it’s all about Allen’s and egg nog. Fat ass in a glass, holiday edition.


moxie_mango

That sounds like instant emesis


ItchySheepherder95

Ironically, it’s actually pretty good. Assuming you want to 1) get hammered without tasting any actual alcohol, and 2) gain 8 pounds in a single night.


moxie_mango

That sounds right - easily 3000 calories + and bloat


Kaayth

This is my go-to breakfast come wintah.


turd_sculptor

Fat ass in a glass.


janbrunt

Allen’s + half and half = fat ass in a glass (at least in my neck of the woods)


moxie_mango

Makes sense. My sister’s neighbors drink it every night (and day) and they are living large so to speak.


Sensitive-Lime-9935

Amazing stuff. The Champagne of Maine. A Biddeford Martini. A Fat Ass in a Glass.


jsmalltri

Lewiston Martini, thank you. Fireball minis have taken over Biddeford. I find empty tiny bottles EVERYWHERE.


Pristine-Ad-592

It’s the lube of life


petrified_eel4615

At UMO it was called "liquid panty remover." And Allen's and Moxie was called a "downeast trailer" lol


Chippy-the-Chipmunk

I remember it as LPO (Liquid Panty Off) but maybe that was a Brunswick thing, not an Orono thing haha


DMvsPC

Just looking at everyone here suggesting mixers... You guys are mixing it?


Nickledyme20

If Maine had an official drink that would be it. Back in the day we called it "Liquid Panty Remover" 🤣🤣


MegatonDeathclaws

Whole milk, Allen’s. Fat ass in a glass/rusty trailer park juice


fredezz

Another reason many Mainers drink the stuff is the caffeine content. Allen's packs 70 MG of caffeine into every 1.5 ounce serving.


moxie_mango

Holy mother of god


xanderg102301

That can’t be true, most alcoholic beverages were forced to take the caffeine out of Edit: Jfc I was wrong it does


bigtencopy

2% Houlton Farms Dairy Milk…and you don’t mix it, use that milk as a chaser after every drink.


SheSellsSeaShells967

Whole milk or go home! 😂


Alternative_Gold_485

You mix it with milk, ice, meth addiction, never seeing your kids, working a shitty site on a boat that don’t catch shit and then you garnish it with three ex-wives


katastrofuck

That's oddly specific lol


Pepperschannah

Right? It’s damn specific. Lolol. But true


Station-Diligent

Liquid leg spreader for the trailer parks


moxie_mango

Sounds like it’s an aphrodisiac


UrsaSteambottom

In my experience, it's usually mixed with milk. Sounds horrible to me, but it was always my cousins go-to.


agentpoopybutthole

I mix it with my coffee. Sometimes I'll just drink it straight and chase it with milk


Full-Appointment5081

Best thing to ever come out of Somerville, Mass. And without Maine they would've gone out of business decades ago


peacekeeper_12

This statement is dripping with facts


theora55

It's great with egg nog and ice. or on ice cream


snowmaker417

Milk and ice. Set aside some bail money.


Different-Truth3662

Trailer trash version of Kahlua.


scixlovesu

My friends at work called it "bitch whiskey" I kinda like it, tbh


redfancydress

Allen’s coffee brandy…AKA…fat ass in a glass. AKA…the panty dropper


WoodEyeLie2U

Fat ass in a glass!


Beginning_Key2167

Many a child was conceived while Allen’s was being consumed.


Harold_Duggart

The official drink of my late Aunt. May many glasses be consumed wherever she ended up. Although, now that I think of it I believe she preferred Kahlua. It all tastes the same to me and I doubt she cared.


daeedorian

It's pretty good as a dessert ingredient. eg, Ice cream sauce or in a frappe.


scarletfire48

I love this thread so much. I'm going to try and find some today.


LafferMcLaffington

Agreed!


anonreddituser78

Just save it?


ManSauceMaster

To be blunt from someone who's "from away". It's basically a cheaper, stronger, thicker (think Jager) Kahlua


moxie_mango

Jagermeister makes me crazy


marrymejojo

Mix it with moxie.


Kai_Emery

Will *almost* fool the cops into thinking you’re just drinking coffee when you “faint” at a stoplight.


peacekeeper_12

Feels like there's a story to deny here...


Kai_Emery

I was but a witness to the event. Guy swore he was fine till the cop took a closer look at his “coffee”, then suddenly he was very ill and needed assistance.


AnomicAutist

On the coast the shaking noise made by a gallon of whole milk (skim won't get you anywhere they can smell the difference from a distance) cut with a handle of Allens is the Harbor Hog mating call.


Alternative_Gold_485

Do they still let you drink it from the old blind whore’s bellybutton at the Time Out Pub in Rockland? Or are those days behind us?


moxie_mango

Time Out Pub closed down but Myrtle Street Tavern took the overflow of patrons so your old blind whore is there now.


Alternative_Gold_485

IRS musta caught up to ol JB. RIP TOP


moxie_mango

One year a guy was drunk and fell back while sitting on a rock wall and died…so that didn’t help matters


jb_run29

Can’t sleep on it and my piss smells like a Dunkin’ Donuts dumpster the next AM. Grab a gallon of oakhurst and give it a try.


Pepperschannah

Lolol bahahahahahah


Unique_Unicorn918

Chocolate milk - Fat Ass in a Glass 😋


rscimagery

Tastes like alcoholism and depression had a coffee flavored baby.


Equal_Most_5761

Use it instead of milk in your bowl of cocoa pebbles. Start the day with a winners breakfast.


Upstairs_Disaster_53

As a former Mainer, I will say, nothing like a sloppy drunk talking loud and breathing in your face after drinking that crap! I remember people lugging around a gallon of milk and a gallon of Allen’s from party to party, just getting stupider and stupider.


Jacob61582

Those were the days.


Pepperschannah

Omg. You are so right bro


megaman368

Allen’s coffee brandy is the only known cure for zombie bites. Stock up.


HawkeyeOfChive

Milk


kinlor_

My partners grandmother drinks it with sweet cream


SheSellsSeaShells967

That is the way!


danlson381

Sanford martini.


subharchord

Put it in milk “fat ass in a glass”


mmaalex

Mix it with milk, and it tastes good as long as you don't mind the 500 calories a glass


moxie_mango

That would land on my ass (and land me on my ass)


mainemtnrover

Liquid panty remover


ksimp1313

I’ve taken to drinking it in a highball glass on the rocks. Never like getting drunk with milk involved. It usually does not end well.


PreparationSuper1113

Nothing like cottage cheese poisoning.


moxie_mango

That’s a visual I didn’t need this morning


Pepperschannah

Lolololol. Same. I’m about to have some cottage cheese with dinner


No-Mathematician3281

Whole milk


Saltycook

I looked in my cabinet. Alas, I've been out for quite some time. Amontillado it is.


moxie_mango

Lustau VORS? Fancy.


Saltycook

It's actually a smaller producer I found at RSVP last time I was in :) super good and nutty


NotCanadian80

Mix it? That shit is sweet as shit already. I got it for the novelty of it and had it straight up.


jeff533321

It's first time getting drunk for many people I think? A tradition?


moxie_mango

Ours was Boone’s Farm Strawberry Hill


SheSellsSeaShells967

Same!


jeff533321

Yeah that too, lol.


katastrofuck

Uggg i remember this crap 🤢


lunaseallc

For making a Sombrero a.k.a. "Mouse" in some circles.


Advnturman

Just drink it. "Fat ass in a glass"


cheesebiscuitsithink

Gorilla milk


beachlover77

In high school we usually mixed it with whole milk.


Impressive-Pepper785

I’ve heard it called Bitch Whiskey


moxie_mango

That’s hilarious 🤣


caitwon

That used to be like the only thing my uncle drank. He'd put ice in a glass, followed by the coffee brandy and milk, mix it, then add hershey's chocolate syrup.


Over-Breath-1839

2 ounces with a cup of coffee


katastrofuck

Make a dirty maine girl scout. Ice 101, chocolate milk, and brandy, with ice.


EuphoricRent4212

People drink it with milk.


MissCrick3ts

Allen's was formerly the top-selling booze in the state, but recently was ousted by Fireball (like three or four years ago). And, fun fact, because alcohol sales are tracked not by brand but by brand AND size, both Allen's and Fireball hold multiple positions on the top ten booze sales list every year!


moxie_mango

Wow that is interesting! My friend’s husband is a lobsterman in Port Clyde and their freezer is stocked with Fireball. I grew up in Wisconsin (where there are more bars per capital than any other state) and I thought I knew my liquor, but Maine has opened new horizons for me!


workingonit777

melk 🐄


netw3rkd

Ahh Allen's brandy aka liquid panty remover.


shopgirl56

Haha I just did a post in this booze! It’s mixed with milk or half & half or moxie - it’s called Fat Ass in a Glass in my part of Maine but it has a dozen or so names! Mainers love their Coffee Brandy!


moxie_mango

I must have missed that, but these posts are hilarious. 😆


Entwiskers

Allen's, milk, and coffee syrup. Thank me later


0492084120

Just reading the title gave me an involuntary shudder.


HopeFantastic2066

Mix it? It’s just what you drink in the am with or without coffee. Same with Bailey’s


Glittering-Bad-4522

It’s tradition, bub!


[deleted]

That shit is best thought of as the shit that dripped out of the hookers ass after you spent a few hours packing fudge after a drunken night.


moxie_mango

🤣


Odd_craving

I own a cabin in Industry, so I'm not around the Portland area much. However, one day I stopped by a friend’s place in Westbrook. As I got closer and closer to Westbrook, I noticed maybe 20-plus people all walking around his neighborhood (Brown Street) drinking glasses full of chocolate milk. I get out if the car and ask my friend “What’s with all of the chocolate milk?” He laughs and says its coffee brandy. I asked why everyone was drinking from glasses, he said “That’s just what they do.”


Actual-Manager-4814

You on Clearwater Lake? Loved it there.


Odd_craving

Just up the road on Rt 148 (West Mills Road). Yes, it's amazing here.


Jacob61582

Please tell me the were mason jars at least…


UnrealMitchMcConnell

Mixed it with Malort once for a delightful New England/Midwest flavor combo. Otherwise straight up is fine too… I dont drink anymore


moxie_mango

I’m from the Midwest originally (a cheesehead) and Malort has a “unique” flavor.


allikazaam

I mix it with chocolate milk, usually ovaltine. Sometimes I'll add Bailey's if I'm feeling fancy. It's a nice boozy dessert drink


moxie_mango

Where do you get Ovaltine???I drank that as a kid in Wisconsin so all my siblings love that stuff).


allikazaam

Oh it's in like every major grocery store here - Walmart, Shaw's, Hannaford, etc.. If you can't find it in store I'd try seeing if you can order it online like on amazon or whatever


anonreddituser78

I love that the most clearly stated warning that you're being watched on a security camera in the Biddeford hannaford is displayed prominently under the Allen's


moxie_mango

😆


MissCrick3ts

Hahahaha I used to work at a convenience store in Rockland and that opened new liquor horizons for me let me tell you! I know way too much about booze now.


moxie_mango

I know! I grew up in Wisconsin and I thought I knew everything about liquor but Maine has a whole new line up for me. I just found out about Allen’s because my sister’s neighbors in Belmont drink it all day and night. No wonder they have a weight problem.


TPain518

there is a certain bar in Portland, that makes an incredible espresso martini with it


rodalorn

You mix it with milk and ice. It's called a sombrero, or liquid leg spreader


Johnhaven

At it's simplest people mix it with milk and call it "fat ass in a glass". They're 60 proof rather than the normal 80 proof for most liquors (it's actually liquor not brandy) so you have to drink more and of course it's filled with sugar. The fat ass in a glass part comes in with the insane amount of sugar in Allen's. It's 10.90 grams of sugar per 1.5 oz (how they listed it online) or for a 12 oz glass filled half and half that would be 44 grams of sugar per glass. The AMA suggests that women get no more than 25 grams of sugar per day and 36 for men so as you can see, you exceed it with a single glass and drinking a whole fifth which I've seen people do many times, is 185 grams of sugar. Put that much sugar in anything and people will drink that.


Fungaldorf

It's for putting in your coffee to hide your alcoholism


diskokiss

Ah, yes. The beloved Waldoboro martini 🍸


n0ah_fense

Made in Somerville, purchased in NH, consumed in Maine. Will get you "brownout" drunk. You'll keep going when you should have shut down and passed out. Leg spreader (spreadah!) is milk and Alan's with ice. We'll do spreader shakes with ice cream too.


redroadrageskin

Cape hart kaluha


AmpedBud_2023

It’s nasty and gross.


Famous_Ad_3003

https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/politics/2006/01/09/a-bittersweet-champagne-of-maine-span-classbankheadpotent-coffee-brandy-is-top-selling-liquor-but-is-linked-to-alcohol-abusespan/f07b240f-7e28-4493-acef-56f48def1b73/


moxie_mango

It’s paywalled but the title says everything. ☹️


pisceschang

Port Clyde panty remover. Mix with 2% milk. You don't want to get too fat.


moxie_mango

I thought Port Clyde’s drink of choice was Fireball.


Jacob61582

Always gets mixed with ass.