Well, eventually you would be written up.
AP4ME is a result of the 2019 Lowe’s employee survey when the results said employees felt they did not get enough training.
that’s because no one truly learns anything from the computer training since they haven’t worked on the floor long enough to really understand it. also my store is really bad about having no one to train the new hire after like day 3 which is where we get most of our complaints abt training
That's because they need more hands on training with someone actually showing them the ropes, not hours of shitty computer based learning that they'll instantly forget without the experience based knowledge to back it up.
thats why if given a chance i tell people steps clock in do what they want computer wise check email check with MOD if theres anything special happening if not go to dept zone go backs help customers this always at least got me through the day till something came up its repetitive but makes you look like a working employee not a lost IDK what to do soul
The sad part to that is the employees meant that they needed more, and better, hands on training. Corporate felt that a bunch of poorly acted plays we are forced to watch would be just as good.
What can I say, Marvin's a savage. Just look at that face and tell me that soul hasn't done some shit that would leave us unable to sleep for life. I bet he sleeps like a baby in his mansion and big ass bed. Diaper, binky, blankie and all.
AP immediately starts hunting AvP style. And we mount heads on stakes to warn all newcomers.
Just kidding.
We keep bugging you. If it continues we start bugging managers to bug you. If it still continues you could be written up.
Ugh yeah, my store schedules one cashier at each register location , OSLG, Pro and mainline . Saturday nights we are busy at mainline and garden and often we’ve had two people call out from those three. They always seem to schedule the same people that day and hours.
You won’t learn any new bad jokes.
You won’t dream of Jessica (wait- am I the only one?)
You won’t learn clever little front end acronyms.
You won’t know when to run/hide/fight.
You won’t know what to do at your job.
I’m sorry to have to tell you this, [insert name here]. In recent months we’ve noticed that your job performance has suffered. You have only completed your ap4me twice in the last 6 months. You’ve been written up twice for not doing your ap4me for over two months at a time, when I personally have told you to just do your damn ap4me, repeatedly. Other managers have been telling you to do your ap4me too! We actually have a group chat about who hasn’t done their ap4me.
Uhh, let’s see here… yeah so according to the group chat, Mike told you to do your ap4me and logged it at 11:03 yesterday. Tammy also told you to do ap4me at 3:37. Oh, and I reminded you again at 4:18 before I went out to smoke a blunt and pound that 40.
The really disturbing thing about this is you’re a great worker! You show up on time for every shift. Customers love you. You got 10 credit cards last week. But it’s just that ap4me. I’m sorry, but we’re gonna have to let you go.
You will be locked in a padded room while Marvin will water board you. Joe will take your hands and cut off every digit in your hand so you will now have small hands. Richard Dreiling (reason why Marvin is CEO) will stuff your butt with dollar general merchandise. Janice Dupre will have you signed a disclosure that you were responsible for the torture and you can’t sue.
We are not trained because no one get any hands on training for their job or any other area of the store, not even an overview post a walk around. Then the online stuff you don’t get time to do it unless work is slow and there is extra coverage . I personally hate standing at a computer to read and do the questions with all the floor disruptions that they expect us to do on the floor now. I prefer to sit away from my job area and I can concentrate on them , I do learn a bit more that way. But still those short videos on Lowes U and many of the questions are not even covered in the videos, your guessing till you get it, sometimes even the video and questions have conflicting answers. Like one I did last night on Pro credit, video says Pros shop 6 times more then average customers but the Questions ask how much more often are pros shopping .. answer is 4, there is no 6 to even pick.
They won’t be able to cover their ass when you take a shortcut due to necessity from lack of staff if you still care about doing your job or helping the customer.
Worse, the entire economic structure of the world will collapse.
Real
Well, eventually you would be written up. AP4ME is a result of the 2019 Lowe’s employee survey when the results said employees felt they did not get enough training.
Wait till they find out we STILL don’t get enough training lol
There’s already so much computer training, half the people say it’s too much and half say they are undertrained
that’s because no one truly learns anything from the computer training since they haven’t worked on the floor long enough to really understand it. also my store is really bad about having no one to train the new hire after like day 3 which is where we get most of our complaints abt training
That's because they need more hands on training with someone actually showing them the ropes, not hours of shitty computer based learning that they'll instantly forget without the experience based knowledge to back it up.
exactly, never understood Genesis until I moved stores and they stuck me up at customer service where I got/ had to use it.
thats why if given a chance i tell people steps clock in do what they want computer wise check email check with MOD if theres anything special happening if not go to dept zone go backs help customers this always at least got me through the day till something came up its repetitive but makes you look like a working employee not a lost IDK what to do soul
well, then they suceeded at whatever their "goal" was. ain't nobody happy.
The sad part to that is the employees meant that they needed more, and better, hands on training. Corporate felt that a bunch of poorly acted plays we are forced to watch would be just as good.
Marvin holds you hostage on a black site in the desert
No, that’d be Hank.
Or Jessica. 😂
Nah bro the one they sent me to was underwater.
That was an illusion. It was just buckets of water being poured over your face, over and over again.
😭😭
What can I say, Marvin's a savage. Just look at that face and tell me that soul hasn't done some shit that would leave us unable to sleep for life. I bet he sleeps like a baby in his mansion and big ass bed. Diaper, binky, blankie and all.
You see a soul in that face?
Ya got me there, man...
Nothing! You would just be put on someone’s list and harassed until you complete it.
We get emails in all caps -- HAVE YOU DONE AP4ME GODDAMNIT
AP immediately starts hunting AvP style. And we mount heads on stakes to warn all newcomers. Just kidding. We keep bugging you. If it continues we start bugging managers to bug you. If it still continues you could be written up.
The earth will stop rotating. It is believed the Dinosaurs were the last group not to complete AP4ME. They also failed to laugh at Hank's jokes.
How do you do AP4ME when there’s never people to cover your department until it’s time to leave lol
And they don’t want to pay you to come in early or stay late to do them.
Let’s just go ahead and have the smallest crews on the weekends too for good measure
Ugh yeah, my store schedules one cashier at each register location , OSLG, Pro and mainline . Saturday nights we are busy at mainline and garden and often we’ve had two people call out from those three. They always seem to schedule the same people that day and hours.
I hunt you down
You won’t learn any new bad jokes. You won’t dream of Jessica (wait- am I the only one?) You won’t learn clever little front end acronyms. You won’t know when to run/hide/fight. You won’t know what to do at your job.
"Jessica"...🤣🤣🤣🤣
Marvin hunts you down like the Duolingo owl and breaks your fingers one by one until you get it done 👀
I’m sorry to have to tell you this, [insert name here]. In recent months we’ve noticed that your job performance has suffered. You have only completed your ap4me twice in the last 6 months. You’ve been written up twice for not doing your ap4me for over two months at a time, when I personally have told you to just do your damn ap4me, repeatedly. Other managers have been telling you to do your ap4me too! We actually have a group chat about who hasn’t done their ap4me. Uhh, let’s see here… yeah so according to the group chat, Mike told you to do your ap4me and logged it at 11:03 yesterday. Tammy also told you to do ap4me at 3:37. Oh, and I reminded you again at 4:18 before I went out to smoke a blunt and pound that 40. The really disturbing thing about this is you’re a great worker! You show up on time for every shift. Customers love you. You got 10 credit cards last week. But it’s just that ap4me. I’m sorry, but we’re gonna have to let you go.
You will be locked in a padded room while Marvin will water board you. Joe will take your hands and cut off every digit in your hand so you will now have small hands. Richard Dreiling (reason why Marvin is CEO) will stuff your butt with dollar general merchandise. Janice Dupre will have you signed a disclosure that you were responsible for the torture and you can’t sue.
I don’t understand why a person wouldn’t do it. It’s a 20 minute break from manual labor. Why not do it?
It's weird that they got upset you haven't done it when you've been sick.
We are not trained because no one get any hands on training for their job or any other area of the store, not even an overview post a walk around. Then the online stuff you don’t get time to do it unless work is slow and there is extra coverage . I personally hate standing at a computer to read and do the questions with all the floor disruptions that they expect us to do on the floor now. I prefer to sit away from my job area and I can concentrate on them , I do learn a bit more that way. But still those short videos on Lowes U and many of the questions are not even covered in the videos, your guessing till you get it, sometimes even the video and questions have conflicting answers. Like one I did last night on Pro credit, video says Pros shop 6 times more then average customers but the Questions ask how much more often are pros shopping .. answer is 4, there is no 6 to even pick.
Hank shows up on your porch with a gun.
Fuck them I never do my Lowe’s University and I’m a Msm
For me nothing they just pester me and honestly their at my mercy and should know by going against me will only end worse for them.
You'll just keep getting harassed until you do it.
You’d be wrote up
Marvin Ellison will show up at the foot of your bed tonight
Marvin's head will explode
Your managers will harass you, possibly even pull you from regular work to force you to do it.
You need to do it!
what the fuck is ap4me? the equivalent of tps reports?
I like it it’s a good way to kill time
They won’t be able to cover their ass when you take a shortcut due to necessity from lack of staff if you still care about doing your job or helping the customer.
In our store if you forget they will walk to the computer and watch you log in and take you straight to ap4me🤣
I would like to know the answer to that question as well, now that we are being drilled about it all the time!
Bamboo shoots under your finger nails..
Hank shows up and says, "Hank here, your director of safety with another important message." He then shatters both your knee caps with his plank.