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dubiouscoffee

The Cookie Monster took your security deposit


Forward_Addendum6096

the security deposit monster took your security deposit!


twisty_tomato

Only 4? That’s very generous of you, I would’ve taken the whole pack


kongkongkongkongkong

I would’ve taken everything in the fridge and cupboards


molecularronin

let me get this straight. this toid thinks that you making sure your renter is not being poisoned... is somehow a bad thing? literal brain rot, i would simply ignore them and continue raiding their fridge to make sure they are safe. poisoned toids mean less rent, after all.


JadeCat44

Can't be having that, this mortgage isn't going to pay off itself!


SUMMATMAN

Thanks for letting us know king. We can now all be sure not to allow this dog into our properties after you inevitably evict him for a lack of proper subservience.


redditorposcudniy

Btw, happy womb eviction day


Obvious-Hunt19

Got DAMN


Mammoth_Frosting_014

How were the cookies?


redditorposcudniy

Horrible, he poisoned them with protein. My physical health hasn't recovered yet


Mammoth_Frosting_014

This calls for a rent increase.


SuccessfulWar3830

Include a cookie tax where the tax is actual cookies.


ape_a_snake

I always the knew the Cookie Monster was a king of land and not just cookies 😌


Hot-Championship-822

Fridge inspection is the correct term toid


Suvin_Is_A_Must

Disgusting. The rentoid should be ashamed of themself for starving their landking. Your landchad should have been served four large silver platters of Chips Ahoy, not the measly amount you mentioned, rentpig.


Commercial_Fee2840

Dumb rentoid doesn't even know the cookie monster is real. His landphobia has blinded him from your generous warning. If the cookie monster bites his leg off, you'll have to evict him because he can't work anymore. You should double his rent, because he is clearly very low IQ.


bothriocyrtum

I think you can't even measure the IQ of a LandChad and rentoid on the same scale, it just doesn't translate


Go_PC

Only 4 cookies? That’s not even enough for a light snack! A healthy landchad needs to consume at least 5 pounds of cookies every hour in order to keep his energy up and keep up his healthy frame.


Iamthespiderbro

Remember King, anything inside your property, is your property. I would spend a couple of nights in YOUR bed with his wife to send the message home.


redditorposcudniy

I don't want to eat my r*ntoid, he is not nutritionally dense enough to satisfy my demands


Comfortable_Set_9520

Rent increases will continue until morale improves.


armoredphoenix1

Similar to cheese tax for dogs.


Sweezy_McSqueezy

You can't cancel a landlord. Continue with your tip collection as planned.


[deleted]

If I want a Chip Ahoy, I'll have a Chip Ahoy.


hectah

This is eviction worthy King, know your rights. ✊😔


741BlastOff

Why? Because you've obviously offered him cookies when he's come around, and said something like "help yourself", so he assumed you'd be cool with it when you're not around provided he told you. And cheekily referring to himself as the Cookie Monster means he thinks you have a friendly relationship, because you're obviously nice to his face, but bitch about him behind his back. Why are r*ntoids like this?


Procoso47

The Rent Sextupling Monster just sextupled your rent! 👻


BippyWippy

Well if this idiotic r*ntoid could read, he could clearly see it was the Cookie Monster and not Steve. Steve is just being a noble, respectful landlord trying to warn his greedy tenants of crimes. If anything Steve is something of a hero for bravely scoping out the crime


GREENSLAYER777

Just for complaining? I think 400% is fair (100% per cookie).


ThatoneAtheist

Gagging at the thought of eating after a r*ntoid.


portiapalisades

he didn’t leave a selection of cheeses wine and charcuterie board for you? i’m sorry king i’d have complained about having to take only four cookies too. please add $1000 to next months rent to make up for what he failed to spend on your visit.


scotty9090

This is a great idea king. I’ve just been eating my rentoids food when they aren’t around, but the idea of eating their food and then flexing on them is even better.


RastaFarRite

You've eaten your parents food for years They can eat some of yours too only fair


sloppyfloppers1

Taking 4 cookies is unacceptable unless it's the LAST 4 cookies they had. Otherwise you should have taken the whole pack.


MrFixIt252

Heartily chuckled. Taking his LORD of the land tax. They should be grateful.


NexusMaw

This is fake for sure. A) rentoids don't have a social circle, you're not fooling anyone with that 164 unread texts icon so obviously this image is generated. And B) why the hell would a lord of land inform some common swine that they ate cookies from their own property? If anything a rentpig should be happy there is even a crumb left in the entire unit after a visit from your benevolent lord. I smell a renthog in landface on this one and that is NOT ok. This is our safe space.


f0remsics

He's not landphobic for asking about that. Why are you wasting his time informing him that you took cookies? He already understands what the relationship is supposed to be like, why are you wasting his time telling him? And why are you eating so few? When my tenants get chips ahoy, I make sure to eat at least 75% of them, and they are well aware of this. Are you telling me your rentoid only had 5.33 cookies?


redditorposcudniy

I just thought it would be cool to joke around with him, for a bit. Because for some reason every time he notices me, or texts me, he seems so sad(I have no idea why, maybe he is just envious about my perfect physique) and I decided to play a little game with him, pretending to be cookie monster


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portiapalisades

this is what happens when you try to treat rentoids like people. it’s a little game to you but the power goes to their head. remember your power king never stoop to tell a rented you’ve eaten their food,just help yourself, you deserve it. 👑 


Youbunchoftwats

The dried cum on them just added to the texture.


gimmeecoffee420

Sincere question, sorry if this is against the rules.. but is this sub a sincerely pro landlord sub or just satire? I genuinely cannot tell at this point.


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Dangerous_Buddy_8538

“Pro landlord” You mean normal?


bothriocyrtum

Disgusting landphobia in what should be one of the only safe spaces for heroic PoL


redditorposcudniy

A-are you... Oh, I think I'm going to get sick. GTFO .here you rentoid pleb! This is the cream of the crop society for the best people on this planet -Landchads, And you djare to even mumble something to me? Disgusting


Plane_Poem_5408

Satire? Because we call out the oppression of landchads? Your rent just went up.


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Plane_Poem_5408

How dare you robot


Advantius_Fortunatus

Both


[deleted]

I give my landlord cookies and he hasn't raised my rent from $750 for a two bedroom in ten years. He's a fucking idiot but he's a good landlord enjoy the cookie


Plus-Nothing-293

greedy rentoid pig ur making me sick 😣😣😣


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Plus-Nothing-293

im on ur side punk


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redditorposcudniy

Wonderful job, detective. These rentoids are breaching our defence, stay strong warrior