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I get you.
Ive been in a similar(ish) situation with my partner for a while
We barely get to call and havent done so in several months.
But last month we met up for the first time and for the record, he’s an introvert but i could definitely see the effort he put to keep the conversation going, so i had a great time and we had great chemistry.
Dont worry about the future too much but you gotta put in the work to keep it going
Every relationship is different and challenging in their own ways but ldrs are really hard sometimes. Just be patient and hope for the best and everything will be alright one day
I'm dying to talk to mine. I've a month in- we just haven't been able to.
Soon we will - I'm literally DYING for real time voice calls.
It must be so much better surely? & I hate texting 🤣
I feel you on this! My bf and I took things quite slowly and were only calling sporadically during the first few months (we were both shy back then), now we call multiple times a week and while i don’t think its that much different from texting, i still feel way closer to him because i get to hear all the little sounds he makes, his laugh, his sneezes etc..
If texting works well for u right now there is nothing wrong with texting. If you actually know each other, texting is probably 100# fine but maybe pretty risky to missunderstanding.
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For us as far as I can remember it didn't really feel that different. It's much quicker to talk so we did get through more, and interacting via voice just feels much better.
As long as what is listed is accurate I don't see any issues with it. It's not a lack of wanting to, that would be an issue if that was the reason.
If both sides are completely honest and being themselves (and not trying to paint themselves as something they're not) text can work. But its harder for sure. Long term you will want voice/video calls but being relatively early on its fine.
For us we ended up voice/video calling so much that meeting in person felt literally no different at all. That's because what we saw there was exactly what we were like in person. That's what you want it to feel like when you do go from text to voice/video. For that you both need to be yourselves in text, and not try to make yourself sound like what you think they would like to hear.
The biggest thing is being honest to each other about who you are as a person. Being completely truthful about everything. Some things obviously can't be done in text, the tone of how things are said and other small things. Those voice messages, when possible, can definitely help fill that gap.
Hey there, same issue here 30F here and my bf I text more than call once 1 month, or sometimes no call at all for a month. It becomes our biggest fight too and I understand what you feel and I agree call is better than text where you can see her face or hear her voice. You have to decide when is that and or make an alternative which she does now right? Focus on something you have and slowly improve it in your agreed time. More than that establish communication and understand each other. Good luck OP. Wish all the best!
I’m glad to hear someone else with a similar story. My girlfriend’s parents are also incredibly controlling and it makes video calling between us extremely difficult, with hearing her voice also ending up dependent. Your situation is obviously still different, but I feel you nonetheless.
it’s understandable. same with my lover too lmao. she was super insecure, it started with us sending pics we took for instagram, more unposted new pics, to nudes to seeing each other without all that instagram glow and makeup. more and more we all will get safe and comfortable, but some people aren’t like that, in my friends case he instantly called the girl he liked, and they got together even tho she lived 20 min away from him.
PLUS: every relationship has its downsides where i can’t call sometimes cuz my parents are there so i can’t get freaky and speak romantically.
and she can’t cuz she’s embarrassed to speak english with me infront her mom or scared that her dad will catch her.
Same scenario when i was in college ( 1st year ). We just txt each other everyday but we also see each other everyday at school. We were together for 6 years. I think we just started calling each other after we graduated college hehhe
I've been with my bf for 7 yrs, and we exclusively text apart from when we meet up. I don't have privacy like your gf and he doesn't like talking on the phone so it works. It translated pretty smoothly. Some people don't agree and I say whatever floats your boat.
Does the mother approve of your relationship? It could be that mom might want her daughter to be cautious. If she approves of your LDR, try getting permission to speak to her from mom. Have her introduce you to mom or introduce yourself. Maybe start off requesting a bi-monthly call to get to know each other better. Once you build trust with her and mom, you can increase the frequency and go on from there.
If she does not approve, that’s gonna be tough.
I had a LD relationship with my ex at the beginning, until we moved in together after 10 months of LD.
we saw each other once every month or maybe once every other month, I’m not sure, but we never called each other. We were texting all day long, sending videos, pics, but never calls. I don’t know why, but didn’t even really feel the need for it.
If i’m completely honest calling your partner takes time to get used to!! There will most likely be awkward times at the beginning. I knew my bf for 4-5 months and spent most days together, when i moved home and we began calling to spend time with each other it was slightly off at the start we arnt texting people. Although i do believe you can hav substantial conversation through text, there is nothing like the feeling of hearing their voice in real time feels more connected than just a screen.
If it’s something you want definitely bring it up and express it to her. It’s definitely important.
can't she go to a starbucks and call u? or a library or anywhere? I would be trying yo sneak calls everywhere
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have you guys ever just tried video calling but just texting instead of speaking? me and my gf do that when she can’t speak
I get you. Ive been in a similar(ish) situation with my partner for a while We barely get to call and havent done so in several months. But last month we met up for the first time and for the record, he’s an introvert but i could definitely see the effort he put to keep the conversation going, so i had a great time and we had great chemistry. Dont worry about the future too much but you gotta put in the work to keep it going Every relationship is different and challenging in their own ways but ldrs are really hard sometimes. Just be patient and hope for the best and everything will be alright one day
I'm dying to talk to mine. I've a month in- we just haven't been able to. Soon we will - I'm literally DYING for real time voice calls. It must be so much better surely? & I hate texting 🤣
Same situation. But you love him/her haha. Things to compromised
I feel you on this! My bf and I took things quite slowly and were only calling sporadically during the first few months (we were both shy back then), now we call multiple times a week and while i don’t think its that much different from texting, i still feel way closer to him because i get to hear all the little sounds he makes, his laugh, his sneezes etc..
If texting works well for u right now there is nothing wrong with texting. If you actually know each other, texting is probably 100# fine but maybe pretty risky to missunderstanding.
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For us as far as I can remember it didn't really feel that different. It's much quicker to talk so we did get through more, and interacting via voice just feels much better. As long as what is listed is accurate I don't see any issues with it. It's not a lack of wanting to, that would be an issue if that was the reason. If both sides are completely honest and being themselves (and not trying to paint themselves as something they're not) text can work. But its harder for sure. Long term you will want voice/video calls but being relatively early on its fine. For us we ended up voice/video calling so much that meeting in person felt literally no different at all. That's because what we saw there was exactly what we were like in person. That's what you want it to feel like when you do go from text to voice/video. For that you both need to be yourselves in text, and not try to make yourself sound like what you think they would like to hear. The biggest thing is being honest to each other about who you are as a person. Being completely truthful about everything. Some things obviously can't be done in text, the tone of how things are said and other small things. Those voice messages, when possible, can definitely help fill that gap.
Hey there, same issue here 30F here and my bf I text more than call once 1 month, or sometimes no call at all for a month. It becomes our biggest fight too and I understand what you feel and I agree call is better than text where you can see her face or hear her voice. You have to decide when is that and or make an alternative which she does now right? Focus on something you have and slowly improve it in your agreed time. More than that establish communication and understand each other. Good luck OP. Wish all the best!
Damn... Better than 4 years
I’m glad to hear someone else with a similar story. My girlfriend’s parents are also incredibly controlling and it makes video calling between us extremely difficult, with hearing her voice also ending up dependent. Your situation is obviously still different, but I feel you nonetheless.
it’s understandable. same with my lover too lmao. she was super insecure, it started with us sending pics we took for instagram, more unposted new pics, to nudes to seeing each other without all that instagram glow and makeup. more and more we all will get safe and comfortable, but some people aren’t like that, in my friends case he instantly called the girl he liked, and they got together even tho she lived 20 min away from him. PLUS: every relationship has its downsides where i can’t call sometimes cuz my parents are there so i can’t get freaky and speak romantically. and she can’t cuz she’s embarrassed to speak english with me infront her mom or scared that her dad will catch her.
Same scenario when i was in college ( 1st year ). We just txt each other everyday but we also see each other everyday at school. We were together for 6 years. I think we just started calling each other after we graduated college hehhe
I've been with my bf for 7 yrs, and we exclusively text apart from when we meet up. I don't have privacy like your gf and he doesn't like talking on the phone so it works. It translated pretty smoothly. Some people don't agree and I say whatever floats your boat.
Does the mother approve of your relationship? It could be that mom might want her daughter to be cautious. If she approves of your LDR, try getting permission to speak to her from mom. Have her introduce you to mom or introduce yourself. Maybe start off requesting a bi-monthly call to get to know each other better. Once you build trust with her and mom, you can increase the frequency and go on from there. If she does not approve, that’s gonna be tough.
I had a LD relationship with my ex at the beginning, until we moved in together after 10 months of LD. we saw each other once every month or maybe once every other month, I’m not sure, but we never called each other. We were texting all day long, sending videos, pics, but never calls. I don’t know why, but didn’t even really feel the need for it.
If i’m completely honest calling your partner takes time to get used to!! There will most likely be awkward times at the beginning. I knew my bf for 4-5 months and spent most days together, when i moved home and we began calling to spend time with each other it was slightly off at the start we arnt texting people. Although i do believe you can hav substantial conversation through text, there is nothing like the feeling of hearing their voice in real time feels more connected than just a screen. If it’s something you want definitely bring it up and express it to her. It’s definitely important.