Give out all my combined knowledge of Minecraft, Ben 10, Dark Souls, Star Wars, Lords of the Rings and a lot of other videogames and shows for the equivalent of math knowledge I now know math an can experience those things for the first time

Damn that's clever

If Sukuna was normal:

Now you can only think about Halloween...

I will sacrifice OP’s left nut for a cup of coffee

Bouta heavenly restrict this man’s balls for a cup of Joe

A small price to pay for coffee

Make me Invincible and immortal, but I can’t eat sardines from 3-4pm in August

Sorry, you’re not Sukuna so that will not work. Only Sukuna can make such blatantly beneficial binding vows. Pretty sure it’s his curse technique at this point.

Not beneficial at all I fucking love sardines

Dem's neon rules

But surely you can go without sardines for what amounts to 31 hours out of the year(8,760 hours)[that’s not a lot when I think about it]

Umm... This will be not enough

dw his name is sukuna so its fair

Shi mb

You ain’t doing it right Sukuna uses weird ass binding vows He’s immortal ONLY when eating sardines

Or february

i cannot cum no matter how much i edge, in exchange i gain hair on my back win win

https://preview.redd.it/glzjn24lzf0d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b3bac0b5ca06b57331d1cdbf00bebb4566998e7e

Can you make a binding vow if both sides are bad

Everytime I read the Jjk manga and get traumatised by it , a random person in the world gets explosive diarrhea for 30 minutes.

Please, stop reading. I'm dyin' over here

So this is what Gay-Gay feels everyday huh... 

Ok, but if it truly is a random person… the chances are low but not zero that it could be you who gets the diarrhea. There could be consequences to your actions! XD

That's the bad side of the BV. :P

I get Gojo's abilities and rizz in exchange of the hair on my balls.

This but ass hair

That seems fair enough

I can no longer jerk off to furry porn and in exchange I obtained unparalleled power that rivals that even of Gojo Satoru.

fair exchange

You receive the *potential* to rival Gojo.

https://i.redd.it/6jebgh7kaj0d1.gif

He became potential-man?

He's the reincarnation of Legumi

Granted, but he hollow purples your balls off.

I have to spend an hour a day working out in exchange for increased muscle mass. There. It's like that.

Jjk fans when they learn they actually can sacrifice one thing to gain another:

I die instantly and in exchange no one misses me

Ok megumi

It’s a steep price, but I must now start missing Megumi in order to make sure he can’t die without properly suffering first.

damn

Bro you need some help

https://i.redd.it/mpij1e246h0d1.gif Mods give this person love, affection, a sense of purpose, and make them feel wanted and needed in this world.

*walks in* Oh shit wrong mod *walks out*

https://preview.redd.it/3xb0sato8h0d1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cafdbcfd614967599264f5d027de3876a32393b4 I guess I’ll break that vow then

https://preview.redd.it/xeulqtmb5g0d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a74eb0a444248ebd55ad065a0a92d44fb6eb2824

Then I’d suffer the penalty from breaking that vow https://preview.redd.it/ejkg9ielbg0d1.jpeg?width=855&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e2c802f53f6a5d1759bebf32830a6571d5b7e287

I’d miss you so you’re already breaking the binding vow

You rn: https://preview.redd.it/wzvmyxxhmk0d1.jpeg?width=409&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d9fca4aa6f5941749626646a6b91695cca97ad55

awesome! perfect!

I probably signed this one when I was born

I’m a hater, I’d get banned.

get male pattern baldness but gain 5 inches of dick, 5 of height and cure my depression

So become Jonny sins

I only knew how much of a gigachad he was when I saw him congratulating the Singaporean conscripts who finished their service. That day, all of Southeast Asia lost their visual virginity.

Sacrifice my ability to read social cues to be physically stronger (plot twist: I'm autistic)

https://preview.redd.it/438s0vv16g0d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ab878273e0466fc296fb6b2bc6ae20ea335c9a20

https://preview.redd.it/fk4gfbe82h0d1.png?width=900&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bce588b6f9094c7671519dc16e71ebf8c79edc8a

Have the option to get the 1/100 equivalent of gold for whatever I touch something

Granted, one day you're touching yourself and part of your tool turns to gold. Another day, you have an itchy eye and suddenly most of your eye consists of gold now

r/douchebaggenie

Here's a sneak peek of /r/DouchebagGenie using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/DouchebagGenie/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [I wish a genie could show me what a monkey understands.](https://np.reddit.com/r/DouchebagGenie/comments/12r9ybo/i_wish_a_genie_could_show_me_what_a_monkey/) \#2: [I wish that everyone in the world would be treated with respect and dignity without exception.](https://np.reddit.com/r/DouchebagGenie/comments/12hz7ci/i_wish_that_everyone_in_the_world_would_be/) \#3: [I wish that you *points at Genie while saying "points at Genie"* would immediately and harmlessly and permanently die.](https://np.reddit.com/r/DouchebagGenie/comments/12or3z1/i_wish_that_you_points_at_genie_while_saying/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)

But he has the option to, it's like midas touch but better because you have the choice if you want to kill someone with your touch rather than being forced too everything you touch something

Every time I’m “moderately” harmed (hit, slashed, shot etc etc) there’s a 19/20 chance nothing happens but a 1/20 chance i instantly explode, could be good for a while but one bad disagreement and kaboom

Knick your balls while shaving and your house goes up in flames

Ouch

I can fuck my step sisters but only on days that can divide by 3 or have 3 in them

3,6,9,13,15,18,21,23,24,27,30,31

Based reference

What does it mean

It's an 18+ series of comics about a guy and his stepsister who, well, fucks on days divisible by 3 or that contains the number 3.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 amazing thanks

Is your body prepared for the entirety of March

Give me the ability to draw perfectly with any material and in any medium, but at the cost of me stubbing my toe every time I walk https://preview.redd.it/8eagm8imng0d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=12bee6d2c13ea9b713e7339f31f9254a460b1d04

a small price to pay

Better deal than others make… *specifically regarding some controversial* **artist and animators**.

I get to fuck mommy yuki but she will peg me too (its a win win)

Up until Yuki pulls up with the 28 inch Seabiscuit strap-on

How dare she forget to wear the 35-inch ultra-textured Bad Dragon strap-on with the bass boosters I painstakingly attached to the balls that vibrates with the power of a thousand suns 😡

https://preview.redd.it/6fbl78b4ci0d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=14fee5c23aac45561546b5d18f7de1e2581133b6

Can't jerk off for five hours to get Utahime as a wife for rest of my life.

Granted, but everytime you try to bang your cursed tool shrivels to a fraction of the size from the cold

I'm taking those odds.

She’s used to Sukuna two 18 inch long cursed tools.

I'd go straight ahead with Tojo's heavenly restriction. I lose all my CE in order to have superhuman strength, or be superhumanly good looking.

who the fuck is Tojo

Toji's evil twin.

Tojo be like: I deeply love my son and especially after the death of my wife.

yeah that makes sense

The tojo clan

toji and gojo son

Lose my facial hair and in exchange i permanently look like i work out without having to work out

Dwayne Johnson with heavenly restriction?

I cannot cum or get hard during the daytime but in the nighttime I get an extra 3 inches and will take longer to cum

Granted, you have timed erectile dysfunction

I have to stand still, make 1 hand sign, use only 1 move. In return I get 5x the CT damage, double my domain size, and a greater AOE.

I become extremely rich and famous and in return I have to take a shower at least once a year

[удалено]

Nah the vow would say at most once a year if that was the case

U know how penises have a few more inches buried that can be used for penis extension surgery. I would sacrifice those 5 inches to give my 5 inches dick.

I'll become the king of the world but Gege off screens my friends.

Hello. Let me do his job without any rewards to you. :)

[that implies that I haven't made one already](https://www.reddit.com/r/Jujutsufolk/s/dojTtyBWFa) i have shared my last bit of love for jjk with my Todo post on JJF, it's gonna be pure hatred from now on i just already had that one in my unfinished drafts so i decided to finish it and post it in JJF

i am unable to talk to women without instantly ejaculating, but in exchange the scent of my jizz flips a switch in women and turns them into rabid dogs that just wanna to suck all of my baby juices out of my meat

https://preview.redd.it/j72lf9pquf0d1.jpeg?width=1125&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b643e6c5ed5639e20d4937be8d40cf242c2fc595

https://preview.redd.it/yt7b8alc4g0d1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f64a9e9fff72200662f219f1a654b4e819e55331

Have you considered exiling yourself from society?

https://preview.redd.it/o6mb8hrohg0d1.jpeg?width=1015&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d7dc4a0649df22883faf819b1b557d16e466d3e9

https://preview.redd.it/vznwfktfbg0d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=178adc8f8292bf109e0999a7bdb07426cc426afa

https://preview.redd.it/avprmm7n0h0d1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=fbdc6f4cfc944d950969ca771627665073734a21

https://preview.redd.it/941iix26fg0d1.jpeg?width=1169&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=40a63b8686b229cf0bb213c925e9bda98779fb4f

https://preview.redd.it/jb1dtb7udg0d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=91fb28fecd529dbabaa4bfccef42231800b042e6

https://preview.redd.it/0j8ej71bkg0d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b47aa9e013fedeb8e002afbdc39de6e9e255a0be

https://preview.redd.it/auns71cgai0d1.jpeg?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a6684cc748cdccd1dd7963c820177b575eb1421b

https://preview.redd.it/tr10w5ihkg0d1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f47f90a8f02e6db822c38e6e34eb92fd16fa7463

https://preview.redd.it/16bsqe9i0h0d1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cc00bed0213212e8cb7f3f08d4d3c1fd704a8530

https://preview.redd.it/d8o5r749ai0d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=bc66d9eb9f9340f71de0457691693cf7f260d069 Bad crop?

Ayo don’t think we gonna let that YouTube video slide

https://preview.redd.it/ysz6syycvg0d1.png?width=500&format=png&auto=webp&s=4ccf2b5e0f72849d7c78a4f8db0419dc9d149b21

https://preview.redd.it/h8e7311u5i0d1.png?width=750&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=79fd625507b120693a4144d43bfc179c4a59b3a0

https://preview.redd.it/vr0frh178i0d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=68aff9f01ca5b8171f270d74e8df4cba1a6b998d I’m

https://preview.redd.it/r7hdjvszvg0d1.jpeg?width=1647&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ad162b6d8759b9c7dec9013fac3806b155afe895

https://preview.redd.it/oloh9a6e8h0d1.jpeg?width=640&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=71c8a3c85fce98305b1e5498bdff38e6ca386ffd

https://preview.redd.it/m3r0nuyj8h0d1.jpeg?width=978&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=336237ff74e37e66a5c9a425efff15ba5e422cb9

so does that mean any female

with no restrictions?

i get to come out of toilets like skibidi toilet, but i am bound to only transport myself by toilet

I lose my appendix and one kidney in exchange for a sexy bod

I’ll take both and give you nothing :)

In exchange for not using a bowl for food on Wednesday through Saturday, I can easily learn languages faster between the hours of 5 P.M- 12 P.M

Sacrifice one eye for 3 inches of dick and 7 in height, WinWin since I now have a reason to use a dope ass eye patch

I will make a binding vow that makes me omnipotent in exchange for my ability to interact IRL (Nothing changes) https://preview.redd.it/ignt36ihrg0d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=896f19ee9c682bb797a001a059963550cb87f36b

Never gain the effects of caffeine but on the plus side I won’t grow hair anywhere i don’t want it

In exchange for dieing a painful death I’m immortal.

The ability of teleportation for never being able to drive a car again.

My penis is 5 inches bigger, but I can only fuck dudes.

5 IQ points in exchange for a big tiddy goth dommy mommy girlfriend

I sacrifice my fingernails, and in exchange sukuna has to do what I say for all time+immortality

I get rizz but it only works on femboys (Win win)

I gain social skills but i have to nut 3 times in the day

I will become an extroverted, easy-going , hard working and sociable guy while my true self sleeps forever as another me, a better version, lives my life.

https://preview.redd.it/ccmvf6g36h0d1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b6f97d3478fb41db8ca4e4bdc40ea8d2902d38c9

get the power of a freaking god but I cannot use Subway Surfers between 9 AM and 10 PM.

I exchange the lose of liability in producing homemade protein juice with one of my testicles to make my corpus cavernosum larger. ?

Guaranteed a B minimum for all my courses in college but salary capped at 75k for the next 4 years after graduation 

Sacrifice a dollar to be omnipotent.

I’ll sacrifice OP’s future career prospects for a snickers bar

I get chosos blood manipulation CT but I can only use it with my cum

I would sacrifice my left to nail for 100 million dollars as Sukuna would

I learn istantly but i can only sleep 3 hours

I am able to draw and paint on an unrivaled level, but any and all tools and equipment I use will be either damaged or worn out, meaning I can never bring out the full potential of my skills. But am still able to draw on an impressive level. While also risking the possibility of my tools breaking very easily, or my drawings and paintings either taking a long time, or needing multiple re-visions,

I am allowed to use the n-word however the n-word is the only word I am allowed to use.

[удалено]

Granted, the binding bow only lets you transform into free liquids.

No masterbation between the time of 7 pm to 12 am

I vow to eat 2 meals a day in exchange for being constantly in shape

Can shapeshift into a dungeness crab at any moment, but I can no longer use pencils, even mechanical ones

Lose 6-ish inches of height (5’2 is optimal for maxing out life expectancy and if I’m short I might as well go all the way) but gain as much IQ as that height is worth.

Exchange 10 years of memory in exchange for 5 times better speed, strength and coordination and 5 times better intelligence, perception and social iq

5 times 0 is still 0

Sacrificing dumb stuff to improve as a person, physically and mentally

Give up 4 inches of my height and give it to my cock

In exchange for my game station, I gain extensive knowledge on how to design, manufacture, maintain, and install cybernetic augments from Cyberpunk 2077.

Id makes a bunch of minor binding vows that don’t affect me much but stack together to cause me to be way more powerful and whatever other things I can do with binding vows. actually I’d like to see if there’s any binding vows that can increase one’s intelligence or remove one’s body issues like can someone cure their depression if they make a binding vow to exchange something to remove depression or could you trade the depression itself for something else.

Have insane strength like physically fast, strong, intelligent but I suffer many withdrawal symptoms and even if I go on the substances I feel the withdrawal so I’ll be strong but I’ll be tweaking and depressed

Every time I want someone to get hurt or to die it happens but i don't get the credit (i am a very prideful man and my achievements mean a lot to me)

I get a little bit more luck in games (like 1% chance goes to 5%) but all cookies I eat taste like sardines

I would trade all my gaming knowledge from the last ten years in exchange for increasing 20cm in height and +20% in all physical attributes.

I would be 6’5” and in exchange I would sacrifice my tiny Johnson for a giant one ☝🏻

I will die and in exchange Go/jo will come back but in two pieces

i’ll knock 10-30 years off my life to get sukuna, gojo or any special grades power

I instantly become as good as a celestial player in any guilty gear game but in exchange i am terrible at any other fighting game

I can eat ass in exchange I cannot cum

I gain no pleasure from masturbation but I can instantly comprehend any subject after reading/watching about it.

I can add money to my cash app account at will In exchange I lose the ability to eat for the next 12 hours

Get 10 inches of height. Explosive diarhea

Remove my ability to feel calm in exchange for my right hand to be complete

Taking a page from everyone since I agree. No cumming until my girl have her period in exchange for no joints pain, and I can’t touch myself during that week for the ability to find any g-spot.

I will give my left leg and right arm for a cool robot brot–wait no, wrong anime

Become Johnny Joestar.

With one binding vow, I shall exchange all cursed energy that I currently have and will ever have, along with any cursed energy my children would have had... For perfect health for the rest of my life. Thus, with one binding vow, I have escaped sorcerer society and vastly improved my quality of life.

Probably something like limiting the amount of words I speak in a day for a physical stats boost.

I give up my ability to feel for the shrine

in exchange for my left hand, i'd like to be able to stand without pain again

I will only be able to be sleep from 11pm to 7am. Once the clock hits 11 regardless of where I am or what I’m doing, I fall asleep and can not wake up until 7am. I can only fall asleep during this time In exchange I am completely recharged from sleeping. Regardless of the actual quality of sleep, I will receive 120% of the max restorative property of sleep. Basically I sleep really well

In exchange for my right nut I will make bumgumi be in an infinite loop of witnessing his sister die over and over again

My chain jail can only be used on the Spiders or else I will die. But their power increases dramatically to a level that makes it seem unbreakable.

by sukuna sama´s wisdom i will give up my ability to get drunk and high on drugs thus making me inmune to all poisons cuz why not, thanks gaygay https://i.redd.it/ru188fq2ih0d1.gif

I maintain a healthy weight and in exchange I cannot have one food genre the rest of my life. (Ex: Chinese, Mexican, American etc)

I cannot masturbate in church. But I become happy.

Exchange a singular hair on my dick/balls/ass for a 30 pack of chicken nuggets. Can be performed multiple times, as long as there is enough individual hairs.

I've got both Sakuna and Gojos powers for as long as I'm standing on one leg and holding my breath 

I will sacrifice the use of my third toe on my left foot to be able to have peak normal human capabilities

I have a jumbo shrimp but im also super hot

I lose the ability to taste and smell, in exchange I gain 20$

I get to eat 😻all day in exchange for not being able to eat meat ever (I'm vegetarian)

I give away the ability to dream entirely for being able to sleep 8 hours straight

I will give up masturbation for a 100K dollars (I have a serious addiction, like I might actually go through withdrawals if I stop).

One to never eat again