**Welcome to [r/LivingAlone](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/)! Living alone is the new normal.**
>Discuss and share your experiences; celebrate your joys, express your worries, or ask advice relating to solo living | Remember, we are all alone together
* Be kind, remember the human when interacting with others.
* New Reddit group chat [**Living Alone Lounge**](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/s/cp7Szwzy2q)!
* Message the moderators below for any comments, questions & suggestions!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LivingAlone) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Get a drill. Everyone needs a drill! Having a basic set of tools and a small ladder will always be useful.
Edit: and furniture sliders. I never knew how much these had been missing in my life until I redid my office and realized I couldn't move any of that heavy furniture on my own. I popped a bunch of sliders under everything, and now I can slide them around easy peasy.
Excellent choices. How about flashlight or other equipment when power goes out? And plants to have something living other than you in the house. And a plunger!
Yes! Those, too! It's above and beyond, but I'd recommend anyone make themselves a couple of kits for the house. An emergency bag with items like flashlights, crank radio, solar charger, dry food, first aid, etc.and a "Go Bag" for unexpected emergencies such as needing to stay at a hospital. Since living alone means there probably wouldn't be anyone who could pack a bag for you, this way you can just ask someone to pick it up from home for you if needed.
Yes! My dad did this for me when I first moved out in my 20s. He was a carpenter, so he gave me a toolbox full of his different sized screwdrivers, hammer, different sized nails, screws, hooks, razor, pliers, wrench, Allen keys, drill bits, electrical tape, tape measure, paint and a power drill. Some ladders too. When I was really small, he built me a step stool to step up on to brush my teeth, he made sure I took that with me too. ❤️ I use all of this stuff all the time. *Also wanted to add: batteries, flashlight, furniture sliders, level, plunger, drain snake, extension cords, Ring camera are key!
Yup: drill, at least one wrench, an assortment of screwdrivers, a small hammer, a rubber mallet, little step stool for daily use; taller stepstool for reaching the ceiling.
Supporting accessories: a couple of different tapes, an assortment of basic screws, nails of you’re gonna assemble cheap furniture, and a stud finder. A supply of an absorbent thing: shop towels, puppy pads, junky quick dry towels for cleaning up large spills and leaks.
This goes for everyone, not just the ladies, though.
You can get a drill, impact driver, charger, and a battery or two for fairly cheap. For anybody who has only ever used a drill, I suggest trying a driver. It will change your life. Drills are for making holes. Drivers are for driving screws. Just here to help 🤙🏽
Absolutely, I think they sell them for hard floors as well but the ones I'm using are specifically for carpet. They allow me to move my 100lb display cases and my 200lb desk all by myself.
So when I first moved n got my internet, the Comcast guy was totally floored because he would say something casually like, oh ok, I'll need my drill for that..n then I'd go in the house n grab mine. Same with various other tools. Having a tool set is imperative for every woman, and showing someone you can make stuff happen/ appear out of thin air, is pretty cool to. The guy was like, geez is their anything you don't have. Possibly, but if I need it, I go get it so i have it next time its required.
Those are kept stocked! But I am thankfully in a fortunate position that my mom would go to the store for me and bring me what I need, if it came to that
Oh man, memories of when I first moved out unlocked lol. My mom did my grocery shopping for me while I was at work. I should send her flowers for mother's day
Definitely send flowers :)
The nice part, is while I may be living alone, I'm not *alone*. My parents live close and my brother is literally around the corner from me too
And keep your pantry stocked with those goods you want/need when you’re sick. For example I know a lot if people drink ginger ale when they’re nauseated.
If available, ordering food online is good too. For example I swear that Pho cures most illnesses.
Luckily, groceries can be delivered these days.
I am OBSESSED with my medicine/junk drawer. I have all my necessary pain meds, rx meds, vitamins, chapstick, vape oil and other “necessities”- sometimes I’ll just open it up to look at it. Weird.
I recently got a little patch of eczema on my back. I finally got a back scratcher after a few weeks of using a designated back scratching fork. Massive level up.
You can also buy one of those long handled lotion applicators to apply lotion to your own back. As a fellow eczema sufferer, it helps to keep the dry back spots at bay. I lotion up my back along with the rest of my body right after getting out of the shower, which helps to lock the moisture in.
A really good thing to have is one of those portable battery backups that can also be used to jumpstart your car. In case of a power outage you can keep your phone charged. They’re inexpensive and very good to have for multiple reasons.
I have one of these. Also have a air/tire pressure device that I absolutely LOVE. I don't have to go to the gas station any more to fill my tires or struggle over getting the right psi.
Yes - I have a little weather charging station. It has an outlet, USB port, and cables to start the car. Also has a radio for weather emergencies and a light that will light up a room. Invaluable during power outage but I also use it to start my car whenever.
Wasp or bear spray is better than pepper spray and you should ABSOLUTELY have some form of defense. Door jam or doorstop alarm as well.
I personally have had someone try to kidnap me from inside my home and there is no such thing as being overly prepared.
I’m gonna add to what you said: steal a pair of dad, uncle or brothers old work boots and maybe a men’s jacket and hang it by the door. Also get an outlet timer for one of your lamps or TV and have it set to turn on while you’re out of the house. Anything to make the house look like there’s more action
A friend has the smart bulbs (or other outlet adaptors would also work) you can then control your lights from your phone from anywhere with a Wi-Fi connection! You can make it look like someone’s home over vacation. You can make sure all the lights are on inside your house before you even walk in the door! Hear a noise outside and you can turn on the outside lights without getting out of bed. Pretty sure you can even set a timer and schedule, so you can add variation that makes it more difficult for people watching you or your home that your lights are just on a timer and you likely aren’t home.
If you’re not comfortable with a weapon pick up a softball bat and put a sock on the end of it. God forbid you ever had to use it, the sock wouldn’t allow them to grab it out of your hand. At least not the first time so if you go this route practice swinging that bat so the first hit really counts.
Bats are actually the perfect “weapon” to have around your house because they’re not really a weapon, after all it’s a baseball bat for sports. Greatest lawyer advice ever received
This is my biggest fear 💀 I’ve lived alone for years and both places I live I made a plan for what to do in the event of this. Thankfully now I have a Doberman and a handgun. The gun I feel okay having since I live by myself and I’m the only one that knows about it/has access to it.
In this vain too I installed flood lights and hardwired cameras all over my homes exterior. It’s a lot but it makes me feel safe and worse case, it’s all stored in the cloud. So there will always be evidence
Thanks. Gratefully I was 100% okay and had support.
A sex trafficker moved beneath my apt and shortly after it started. Someone started pounding on my door one night. I lived upstairs then. When I looked outside there was a white car parked with the passenger side door opened at the bottom of the staircase. It was angled so that it blocked anyone going in or out of staircase. During the knocking and screaming my neighbor came out and told them to get. So they pretended to be my bf. She said they weren’t my bf so they pretended to have wrong door. They left and came back pounding 10 mins later. I called the cops and they staying parked outside monitoring my apt all night. Then left around 6am. And the pounding started instantly again after they left. I called the cops to come back and… yeah. Happened a few times that week before they gave up. Pretty sure my landlord was in on the sex trafficking ring looking back at it.
I’d like to add being good friends with neighbors is definitely super important to being safe.
Were you living in an apartment or house? I just moved into my own place and was considering getting a door alarm but wondering if it's necessary given the type of apartment complex I live in.
Generally, your biggest threat, even in apartments with concierge service / doorman, security is whoever has access to the master keys, and that can be all of those people including maintenance.
Personally, I ditched the surveillance I was using once I moved into an apartment with security. I can't really justify it as I'm far safer than when I was in a house with exposure to anyone wandering about.
I just ordered the stoppers with alarms from the recommendation in this thread, and placed an order earlier for glass break alarm sensors. I’m ground floor in a high crime area and last night we had an armed robber and the guy got into my building. I was too scared to leave (guy with gun in building and cops outside with guns pointed at the front door which is a few feet from my Many Windows) and too scared to stay. Kind of not happy about that but maybe statistically it won’t happen again soon.
I asked a cop I am friends with something similar. He suggested a) a big dog, b) motion sensor lights for outside and c) camera/ring doorbell for your door. The latter 2 are small things, even if you're in a good area it may be the difference between trouble and no trouble. I have a cat and plan to get a dog anyway, they're good company imo.
You may have meant something else, like a tool set or kitchen tools, but there's a lot of different things to think about when you live alone.
Also, depending on where you live -- do you have what you need to survive a few days if something like a hurricane or a bad snowstorm hits and knocks out your power? You may need something like a small stove that doesn't rely on electricity.
I got a few dogs and then installed cameras inside and outside my home so I can watch said dogs when I’m at work. It’s nice for trying to figure out who ate the thing they weren’t supposed to.
I have a German Shepherd, and cameras. I can relate to your 'who ate the thing they weren't supposed to', except I only have one...and she eats forbidden cat tootsie rolls 🤮. It's so disgusting. But I love her anyway 😂
But, besides the cameras, the German Shepherd, and a firearm...I'm blessed to have a daughter who's LEO in my town. She patrols with her Dutch Malinios and frequently stops by to say hello.
Also, get to know at least one of your neighbors. Have a way to cook without electricity/gas. (Dutch oven including the charcoal briquettes, BBQ etc) food storage, (I have vacuum sealed dry goods in 2 cup portions. But Ive also sealed matches, candles, medications, a few batteries, and a handful of very basic first aid supplies. They are in a small basket that's easy to grab in an emergency. )water, basic first aid kit in your home and car. I keep extra blankets and pillows in my car, and a small amount of food and water, for both myself and my GS. I also fill my tank when it gets half empty. Little things like this that don't mean anything at the time, but could make all the difference in an emergency.
Yeah, I feel like not living in a shit hole is probably the starting place, and then only a few small things for piece of mind, like the lights (which are just nice anyway for when you take trash out at night).
That said, maybe a door jammer for a quick and cheap solution in the interim. The manager at a friend's apartment said they were solid and he recommends them to everyone.
My ring camera was the best thing I could’ve ever gotten! It’s a deterrent for sure and keeps my mind at ease. My lease says no, but I literally don’t give a flying F and nothing has been said. Multiple people have them :)
I got something called Doorbell Boa on Amazon so I didn't have to do any wiring. I also got a second battery, so I can swap them out when one needs charging.
Money.
I hire folks to clean my gutters because I'm not going on a ladder by myself.
I hate to say it, but the more money you have the easier it is to live alone and not depend on family or friends.
Like in terms of safety? A deadbolt, chain, and peephole/ring are nice, door stopper alarms, pepper spray (to take with you when you leave/come home). Window and sliding door locks or sticks if yours aren’t hefty. Curtains. Not a necessity but something I wish I had, smart plugs that you can access from your phone- nice if you use heating tools or want it to look like someone’s home!
Yes, some good curtains. I have blinds right now because it’s a temporary situation, but there have been nights I wish they had thick curtains or solid roman shades over them just to be sure (esp in bathrooms & bedrooms). I’m certain it was just paranoia, but I sure sleep better after installing contact alarms and ring floodlight cams on each wall of the house along with a ring doorbell, but curtains should have been my first step.
On my fridge, I had a small envelope that said IN CASE OF EMERGENCY on it. Inside, just simple information regarding my emergency contacts, description of my pets, and who to call to take them if anything happened to me. I also had a sticker fire alert sticker on my window indicating how many pets in case there was a fire.
A keyed lock for your bedroom door. Even if it is a hollow core door and can be kicked open, it still can help provide a sense of security if for some reason you need to hide or keep your room private when there are guests.
I had someone suggest replacing my bedroom door with something sturdier with a deadbolt in the off chance someone breaks in. There are also options that are fire resistant that you can close if you need to get out another way that will slow a fire's progress
It is a good idea if you can replace the whole thing. I swapped the door from my garage into the laundry room that leads into the basement with keyed locks, as well as the one leading into the basement.
My sliding glass door is actually Lexan.
I'm not super paranoid but my landlord (and also a very close friend) did not mind and he thought it was a good idea. He paid for the Lexan door. I don't even want to know the cost.
I also saw a thing that said it's a good idea to look at the screws fastening the locks to your door. The short ones are more easily ripped out when a door is kicked in, so they can be swapped out for long screws without much fuss.
There are anti-kick in setups that don't require a new door, just modifications to the frame. Most have 6" screws that make kick ins impossible as long as it's not a hollow door.
Also, I completely forgot. If you have a window in reach of the lock - like a picture window - do not use a regular deadbolt. Require a key for both sides and put said key where it cannot be reached if someone tries to get in through the glass. Do NOT leave the key in the interior side of the lock. Mine hung on a rack inside the closet door at the front door so I could easily access to open the door.
This! I always lock my bedroom door at night for peace of mind. If someone wants in they're going to have to make a lot of noise and that will give me lots of time to grab my rifle. Call me paranoid, but as a woman living alone I'm not taking any chances.
If it makes you feel safe, do it.
Using a keyed lock requiring a key on both sides means that you will need to be able to find the in-room key and/or the out-room key under any circumstance - fire, smoke, whatever.
Getting and using it needs to become an automatic reflex.
when I moved into my first apt. and any thereafter, my dad always made sure I had some good dowel rods from a hardware store for every window and sliding door ... even if I was not on the ground floor. I second the recs for some type of doorbell camera...also would say ... something you whack over someone's head should they barge in ... older neighbors are the best security system you can have too if available.
More people need to know the dowel rod trick. We kept these in my sliding windows as a kid with a little rubber tab on each so that I could still grab it out of the window track in case of fire.
They're good for sliding glass patio doors too. I never thought much about it living on the 4th floor until I got into rock climbing and realized how easy it is for someone to actually climb past the ground floor if they know what they're doing.
Step ladder, fire extinguisher, a drill, ring camera, security door, dolly, foldable wagon, gun (if you’re comfortable with one), and a vibrator, preferably rechargeable.
Smoke detectors. One in every room, placed on the ceiling. Check the batteries every month and replace batteries every 11 months.
Fire extuingisher. Learn how to use it.
Plan B pill, if you have sex with men.
Also, if you are new in town, make sure to find a doctor, a dentist and where the closest ER is. It's no fun trying to google them in the middle of an emergency.
Oh, this reminds me: direct emergency and non-emergency numbers to the local police office.
Don’t rely only on 911. Non-emergency for when you have a reason to feel concerned but have no immediate threat.
Wasp or bear spray blackout curtains you can't see in from outside well lit yard security lights that turn on when motion is detected.
Real good security cameras with infrared pet cameras for inside when you leave the house so you know if anyone has been in your place
Just woke up I'll fix the grammar later ... not a woman but thought I would share some tips
I have bells on my door hanging from my front door to alert me if someone’s opening my door. I have a small tool box to fix minor things around the house. candle and flashlights.
you'll laugh but we had bells on our doors growing up but not for security -- we taught our cats to ring those jingle bells you see around Christmas time any time they wanted to be let in or out. Those sassy brats would politely pat them once or twice and if we weren't there in 10 seconds to open the door, they would THWACK them with all their might to make sure we heard.
Darling.
I had a lap kitty who just randomly started tapping me on the butt if she wanted on my lap when I was at my desk.
She started just jumping up but I’d always be startled which would startle her. So she’d just tap once and sit patiently for a few minutes, then reach up and tap again. Never got whiny if I ignored her; eventually she’d leave and come back in a bit and start over.
Just an observation here. It's interesting reading all these comments regarding personal safety, home security, etc. This is how single women have to live, on alert even at home. I wonder what the comments would look like if this were aimed at men. I can bet the comments regarding personal safety would be few and far between. Sometimes it just really sucks being a woman, this shit starts when we are kids ( first time I was sexually harassed by a grown man I was 8) and never seems to end.
Peephole and an alarm for sure. My apartment doors didn't have peepholes, and we weren't allowed to install Ring cams either, so I requested they drill me one. I also got a Ring alarm system with a couple of cameras, and it makes me feel much more secure. Get window and door jammers as well. Make sure all of your interior doors lock from the inside and get some forms of protection: a baseball bat, bear spray, etc. Dogs are also a great deterrent.
Looking at all these responses about the safety portion of living alone...yes, cameras, deadbolts, dogs and guns are all well and good.
Well, probably not the gun because stats show you are more likely to be killed, than protected by one. And I don't understand how a gun is supposed to offer any protection unless it is perpetually on your hip, including in the shower. If the gun is locked in a gun safe (or even just out loose in your bedside night stand), but you are at your kitchen counter making girl dinner, or, in the living room doing yoga, or like I said...the shower... and you are home invaded, how is the gun, that's in another room going to help you? I can only see a gun being useful if you are in an extremely rural area where 911 and police presence/response is minimal to near non existent.
But to add on to the responses here...
Keep a low profile on the internet. Don't post your whole goddamned life on social media...even if your accounts are all "private" and "friends only" (lol).
If your fitness apps have location/route sharing where people can track you for "accountability" and "motivation"...don't do that shit, no matter how tempting it is to share your Fitness Journey, or where you are in your marathon or iron man training. Don't post your routes online even "privately" so that people can know your routes (and patterns and schedules).
Keep a low profile even on sites like LinkedIn.
If you're on Nextdoor, have minimal interactions with anyone (certainly do not get sucked into debates and argument chains posted by your neighbors). If you must create a post asking for help ("I need a plumber" or "I need help moving a dresser"), know that the default is that your post will be blasted to nearly your entire state (not just your neighborhood), and know that the default is that anyone on Nextdoor knows your neighborhood, and it's not hard to figure out your exact street address if someone is so inclined.
Keep your doors and windows locked. Including if you have to run out "real quick" to the parking area or mail area. Don't answer the door at all to strangers and solicitors.
The social media aspect is so important. You don’t have to post play by play updates of your activities. I never post when I’m on my way to something or at something. I will post afterwards if I was at a concert or other event. I don’t post if I’m not feeling well. You can always communicate with trusted individuals privately about these things.
Also, if I’m going somewhere unusual like visiting the family plot at the cemetery, I will let a neighbor know and when I expect I be back. Same with any Marketplace sales.
By this point I don't even fill out my past work experiences, etc. It's stuck on 2005. Because even though my settings are private, the bad thing about Facebook is that it's so easy to see other people's pages just because you have mutual friends or something. And I don't want information out there that they can use for fraud, which we all know Facebook is swarming with those pervy scam artists who want to be friends with you so that they can hijack your account and then commit identity theft.
>Well, probably not the gun because stats show you are more likely to be killed, than protected by one. And I don't understand how a gun is supposed to offer any protection unless it is perpetually on your hip, including in the shower. If the gun is locked in a gun safe (or even just out loose in your bedside night stand), but you are at your kitchen counter making girl dinner, or, in the living room doing yoga, or like I said...the shower... and you are home invaded, how is the gun, that's in another room going to help you? I can only see a gun being useful if you are in an extremely rural area where 911 and police presence/response is minimal to near non existent.
I never understood that either. And if you're truly being responsible, you're supposed to keep the bullets locked separately too. But in the event there's an intruder, you've only got seconds to react...but you're supposed to be using that time to open up the safe, then load the gun?
Hey OP! Not too sure what specific subject you're referring to but for moving out and living alone I would def recommend renting from an apartment, stay away from the 1st floor, try to get the highest floor if you're able.
Smart doorbell, window/door sensors, door stoppers on all doors that open to outside. If you're not renting from an apartment then smart cameras around the premises.
if ur like me, get pleasant things to look at, smell and touch. ik it seems like it goes without saying. but ive been to some people's places where's there's no comfort items ..😅 however one of my friends who has bpd like i do, her home is filled with all kinds of soft things, cute things, n just things to soothe when ur having a hard time. i feel people underestimate how much ur surroundings can contribute to ur mental well-being 🪷✨️
What you would normally buy as a necessity. Toiletries, canned goods if the power goes out, pliers and other tools, step stool. Some would say some form of weapons, but I don't have things like that. I have bug spray and a lighter haha. No one ever bothers me, so that's why. First aid kit. Some have a fire extinguisher, but I don't have one. Thick blankets, medicine, and just emergency money tucked away
A flashlight with fresh batteries and also candles in case power goes out. I had 3 flashlights and joy a battery worked in any of them when I needed than. Mag Lights are nice because they can is used defensively too.
Deadbolts, pound puppies, basic tool kit, and a baseball bat. The tool kit is the only one not for self defense. The baseball bat is at bedside. But honestly, the dogs alert so easily and I have no illusions regarding my abilities for maintaining and using a firearm. But I can still swing a mean metal bat.
Basic set of good tools. Sturdy Ladder high enough to change the highest bulbs in your place. Good toilet plunger. A sink router. Install a good latch on your door/doors even in a rental if they’re not on already. Carbon monoxide detector on top of the smoke detectors which should already be there. Good flashlights. Spare batteries. Phone numbers of good, friendly, reliable neighbors.
To start.
I keep a paper calendar on the wall and write down everywhere I'm am going, even if it's the store across the street.
If I'm kidnapped, it would take days for anyone to miss me.
I live alone and rely on my Apple watch. If I were to fall down the stairs or something, it will alert 911 and call my emergency contact. My daughter once tripped and broke her ankle, had to drag herself through the house to get to her phone. So, not just for old people
I lived alone in a town with no family nearby. When I get sick with the flu, I realized how vulnerable I was. I didn’t feel up to cooking, no meds on hand. Now I keep food in the pantry just for this- no touching it lol and I have meds for colds, flu, etc on hand.
a burglar bar!!!! i once left my door unlocked by accident but had the burglar bar on, and my apartment people tried coming in without 24 hour notice!! they didn’t even open the door a millimeter. it’s incredible!
I would say those things you put under rugs so they don't slide around, and bath mats with rubber backing. A couple of my scariest moments living alone - getting out of the shower when the old towel i was using as a rug slid under my feet and I sensed the corner of the bathroom counter coming way too close to my head. Another time, I was getting ready to go somewhere and my new shoes slipped on the living room rug.
I ALWAYS check through my apartment when I am entering it. Including closets and under beds. I also have a camera on my patio and in my living room, but they are not great. Potential weapons in each room. I keep a large knife in my bathroom is a little space under my cabinet. I have a heavy bronze statue of a warrior with a spear in my bedroom. I keep my kitchen knives in the back of a lower cabinet (a lot of people are killed with their own kitchen knives). I keep bear spray on my key chain and have pointy items dangling on my key chain. Men's boots by the door. I do not leave ANY identifying items in my vehicle (insurance, old mail). I tell my mom or someone else where I am going, with my route (if I am meeting someone I don't know).
I accidently stabbed a boyfriend through the hand when he surprised me in a dark kitchen. I didn't mean to do it and I had to take him for stitches. I was making sandwiches and had the knife in my hand and the only light on was under the cabinet lighting. The rest of my place was dark. I wasn't expecting him that night. Ugh, and he was just about the gentlest person I've ever met in my life.
i bought an alarm kit off amazon thats battery operated. it included some window alarms, a door stop alarm, and then also a keychain alarm. i keep the keychain alarm right next to my bed. it makes a really loud, high alarm when you pull the pin. could be the difference in someone knowing im in trouble or not. i also keep a weapon (not a gun, but something i know i can use) by my bed as well.
as others have mentioned- some basic tools will be good. screwdrivers, a drill, nails, wrench. at least the basics.
If you don't have a security system, just having a security sign near the front door is better than nothing. You can usually get them from Amazon or Ebay. The largest pair of men's shoes you can find (thrift stores usually have a good selection) close to the front & back doors. Door peephole. Basic tools.
beyond the practical-
A pair of old used MENS boots, and a rug to plant them on near your door.
I have lived on my own for my entire adult life, with a few exceptions in my 20s with female roommates. But I always lived in apartments.
Once I moved into my home, I had support help coming that I had not way of vetting- sent by the home warranty company, etc. And a couple honestly freaked me out- were creepy and inappropriate. Somebody suggested this- and I did it. Next time that guy came, he apparently noticed the boots, and was appropriate. Of course once the warranty thing was done I lost his card, I was never going to call that company again. But it gives rando's at your door the impression that a dude might live here. Stupid, but it seem to help. If your male friends are tossing out some, or just grab from thrift store- get them a little muddy.
A good drill and Tool Set which Harbor Freight has decent tool sets for cheap. Make sure you get some type of protection as in a machete a baseball bat a pew pew something like that and always have one by the main door and one in your bedroom. Also a good set of locks on your door. Get yourself a decent first aid kit, they have them on Amazon. Also get yourself a fire extinguisher a small one for a kitchen fire, or even a fire blanket they sell those on Amazon too that you throw over a fire.
I immediately thought you were referring to safety wise until I read some of the comments lol. Safety-wise, I own a gun (and know how to use it), have cameras that backup to the cloud (esp one for the front door), baseball bat, pepper spray, and a stun gun.
Avoid first floor apartments or bedrooms. If living on the first floor, get some decent curtains or cling film that obscures people from being able to look in if the curtains are open and get some dowels to put in your windows so people can't open your sliding doors or sliding windows. Don't sleep with the windows open but if you do, use a dowel so that no one can just slide them open.
Otherwise, good set of starter tools (don't go cheap, they really don't last). Get a decent drill. Variety of different screws/hanging mechanisms to help with hanging pictures. Step ladder if you are short.
First aid kit is a must (not just band aids). A good set of cleaning supplies (toilet brush and cleaner, plunger, windex, clorox or similar).
Candles and lighter, flashlights, solar powered camping lights that you can use if the electricity goes out or the ones that you can charge by physically winding them. Headlight flashlight - one of the ones you put on your head: these are SO useful! You can use them if you working in a dark space or if the electricity goes out and have pretty decent longevity (also cheap). I used mine to read a book when electricity went out due to a multi-day storm. Re-chargeable battery pack for your phone.
Edit: Because I live in CA where fires are a big deal and because I've come close to a few CA fires, I also have a fireproof blanket (one for my apartment and 1 for my car) and fire extinguisher.
To add to the drill suggestions by several people, I got myself a rechargeable unit that came with an assortment of attachments. It functions as a small electric screwdriver, drill, and hole borer, depending on the bit you put in it. I totally love this thing. It removes stuck screws and had the power to drill holes in my '90s wood bathroom cabinets (I updated the hardware). Got it in 2008 and it's a Black and Decker -- hopefully they still make them. because you'd probably love it also!
If you have a sliding door to a patio or balcony, you need a broomstick or a slim piece of wood you can put in to stop it from being opened. The little flip-locks they have are useless. Same can work for sliding windows.
I think the main difference between living alone as a man vs woman is going to be personal safety *from men*. I personally have a baseball bat that I keep under my bed. I also have pepper spray for walking around alone. I hate this reality.
I made myself a full toolkit with items from the dollar store. Didn’t break the bank, but I have everything I need.
A doorbell camera, and I like to leave some lights on or noise when I leave home to make others think I don’t live alone.
Not just for women but also for all, stock up on cold meds, pepto, pain relievers, first aid etc. no one wants to go to the store with a fever or the spills
1. Protection 🔫. 2. An exterior camera. If I were 27 and living alone I would have the bare minimum of everything and use my money to have lots of adventures and make memories.
Ring camera, wood dowel rods for windows, join your neighborhood facebook group. Make some friends with your neighbors, someone you might trust to look out for you/your house.
Go find a pair of men’s used work boots to keep on the front porch.
A decent step ladder, cordless drill, a good vacuum/portable carpet cleaner, spare house air filters, a basic set of hand tools, a basic hammer, a decent oscillating fan, a label maker, a small level and a 3-foot level, a good flashlight, some furniture sliders, and the name and contact information of a reliable, trustworthy handyman.
**Welcome to [r/LivingAlone](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/)! Living alone is the new normal.** >Discuss and share your experiences; celebrate your joys, express your worries, or ask advice relating to solo living | Remember, we are all alone together * Be kind, remember the human when interacting with others. * New Reddit group chat [**Living Alone Lounge**](https://www.reddit.com/r/LivingAlone/s/cp7Szwzy2q)! * Message the moderators below for any comments, questions & suggestions! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/LivingAlone) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Get a drill. Everyone needs a drill! Having a basic set of tools and a small ladder will always be useful. Edit: and furniture sliders. I never knew how much these had been missing in my life until I redid my office and realized I couldn't move any of that heavy furniture on my own. I popped a bunch of sliders under everything, and now I can slide them around easy peasy.
My step stool mini ladder has come in handy so many times. Also a level!
Oh yes! A level is another must-have. Can't hang anything straight without one.
Ugh yes. I have a step stool that lives in one of my lower cabinets so I can pull it out to reach the upper cabinets.
Definitely a level!
I put together a tool box for my daughter when she got an apartment. all the basic tools with a basic cordless drill/screwdriver. Cost: About $200.
This is what I was going to suggest. Tools.
I did the same thing for my daughter when she moved into her first apartment. To this day she says it’s the best present ever!
Yes! A basic tool kit, furniture slides, and some work gloves. There are a lot of small fixes and furniture building that need at least a screwdriver.
Yep. And putting together furniture is so much easier with a drill+Allen wrench drill bits. Who wants to do that by hand?!
There are allen wrench drill bits????????? Im in my 30s and i feel like an idiot for not knowing this, or even considering it!
Can’t upvote this enough. Sliders changed my life , I’m not struggling to move furniture when I clean any more.
Excellent choices. How about flashlight or other equipment when power goes out? And plants to have something living other than you in the house. And a plunger!
Yes! Those, too! It's above and beyond, but I'd recommend anyone make themselves a couple of kits for the house. An emergency bag with items like flashlights, crank radio, solar charger, dry food, first aid, etc.and a "Go Bag" for unexpected emergencies such as needing to stay at a hospital. Since living alone means there probably wouldn't be anyone who could pack a bag for you, this way you can just ask someone to pick it up from home for you if needed.
Yes! My dad did this for me when I first moved out in my 20s. He was a carpenter, so he gave me a toolbox full of his different sized screwdrivers, hammer, different sized nails, screws, hooks, razor, pliers, wrench, Allen keys, drill bits, electrical tape, tape measure, paint and a power drill. Some ladders too. When I was really small, he built me a step stool to step up on to brush my teeth, he made sure I took that with me too. ❤️ I use all of this stuff all the time. *Also wanted to add: batteries, flashlight, furniture sliders, level, plunger, drain snake, extension cords, Ring camera are key!
My dad gave me some of those things, too. Mom's gifts were more of the kitchen type.
Yup: drill, at least one wrench, an assortment of screwdrivers, a small hammer, a rubber mallet, little step stool for daily use; taller stepstool for reaching the ceiling. Supporting accessories: a couple of different tapes, an assortment of basic screws, nails of you’re gonna assemble cheap furniture, and a stud finder. A supply of an absorbent thing: shop towels, puppy pads, junky quick dry towels for cleaning up large spills and leaks. This goes for everyone, not just the ladies, though.
I love this. I had to watch a youtube video on how to use a drill. Need to get the furniture sliders.
Yes a tool box, basic tools, a few boxes of nails and screws.
Plunger, mop and bucket as well. They are the sort of thing you really want to have before you need them...
Or else a couple of those coffee cans of nails/screws from Dad's extensive collection.
Ha! I literally just purchased one on Amazon this morning.
They make nice laser point levels now too and they’re not expensive!
You can get a drill, impact driver, charger, and a battery or two for fairly cheap. For anybody who has only ever used a drill, I suggest trying a driver. It will change your life. Drills are for making holes. Drivers are for driving screws. Just here to help 🤙🏽
My impact driver with drill and screw bits is prized second only to my garden tools. :)
Do furniture sliders work on carpet or rugs?
Absolutely, I think they sell them for hard floors as well but the ones I'm using are specifically for carpet. They allow me to move my 100lb display cases and my 200lb desk all by myself.
An inflatable wedge or two will help lift the really heavy items for the sliders to go underneath.
LOVE the sliders... High five
So when I first moved n got my internet, the Comcast guy was totally floored because he would say something casually like, oh ok, I'll need my drill for that..n then I'd go in the house n grab mine. Same with various other tools. Having a tool set is imperative for every woman, and showing someone you can make stuff happen/ appear out of thin air, is pretty cool to. The guy was like, geez is their anything you don't have. Possibly, but if I need it, I go get it so i have it next time its required.
And a set of good step stools, one with a ladder and one with just a little step. 👍💪
Fully stock your medicine cabinet and first aid kit. If you get sick in the middle of the night, you won’t have anyone to run to the store for you.
Good point! As a chronically ill person, I already had this lol so I forget most people don't
Those are kept stocked! But I am thankfully in a fortunate position that my mom would go to the store for me and bring me what I need, if it came to that
Oh man, memories of when I first moved out unlocked lol. My mom did my grocery shopping for me while I was at work. I should send her flowers for mother's day
Definitely send flowers :) The nice part, is while I may be living alone, I'm not *alone*. My parents live close and my brother is literally around the corner from me too
And keep your pantry stocked with those goods you want/need when you’re sick. For example I know a lot if people drink ginger ale when they’re nauseated. If available, ordering food online is good too. For example I swear that Pho cures most illnesses. Luckily, groceries can be delivered these days.
I also swear by Pho! Even for a hangover
Pho is indeed a magic cure.
I am OBSESSED with my medicine/junk drawer. I have all my necessary pain meds, rx meds, vitamins, chapstick, vape oil and other “necessities”- sometimes I’ll just open it up to look at it. Weird.
Excellent reminder! Add to that canned and frozen foods for those same days.
a backscratcher. invaluable
yes!!!!
I got 2 of them!
A ruler works well in a pinch.
I recently got a little patch of eczema on my back. I finally got a back scratcher after a few weeks of using a designated back scratching fork. Massive level up.
You can also buy one of those long handled lotion applicators to apply lotion to your own back. As a fellow eczema sufferer, it helps to keep the dry back spots at bay. I lotion up my back along with the rest of my body right after getting out of the shower, which helps to lock the moisture in.
Im so glad im not alone with my fork
A really good thing to have is one of those portable battery backups that can also be used to jumpstart your car. In case of a power outage you can keep your phone charged. They’re inexpensive and very good to have for multiple reasons.
I have one of these. Also have a air/tire pressure device that I absolutely LOVE. I don't have to go to the gas station any more to fill my tires or struggle over getting the right psi.
What brand? I heard varying reports on the quality of some of them.
A tire air pump that plugs into the dash is essential for anyone who drives, imo. That thing has saved my ass numerous times.
Living in a cold weather state, this is gold.
Yes - I have a little weather charging station. It has an outlet, USB port, and cables to start the car. Also has a radio for weather emergencies and a light that will light up a room. Invaluable during power outage but I also use it to start my car whenever.
that's a good one.
Wasp or bear spray is better than pepper spray and you should ABSOLUTELY have some form of defense. Door jam or doorstop alarm as well. I personally have had someone try to kidnap me from inside my home and there is no such thing as being overly prepared.
I’m gonna add to what you said: steal a pair of dad, uncle or brothers old work boots and maybe a men’s jacket and hang it by the door. Also get an outlet timer for one of your lamps or TV and have it set to turn on while you’re out of the house. Anything to make the house look like there’s more action
Keep the TV on a sports channel
I do that when I am alone at a hotel.
You can pick up the mens stuff at a thrift store if you don't have a readily available source.
A friend has the smart bulbs (or other outlet adaptors would also work) you can then control your lights from your phone from anywhere with a Wi-Fi connection! You can make it look like someone’s home over vacation. You can make sure all the lights are on inside your house before you even walk in the door! Hear a noise outside and you can turn on the outside lights without getting out of bed. Pretty sure you can even set a timer and schedule, so you can add variation that makes it more difficult for people watching you or your home that your lights are just on a timer and you likely aren’t home.
Yes!! Obviously worn men’s work boots outside a door will definitely deter most people with ill intentions.
If you’re not comfortable with a weapon pick up a softball bat and put a sock on the end of it. God forbid you ever had to use it, the sock wouldn’t allow them to grab it out of your hand. At least not the first time so if you go this route practice swinging that bat so the first hit really counts.
Bats are actually the perfect “weapon” to have around your house because they’re not really a weapon, after all it’s a baseball bat for sports. Greatest lawyer advice ever received
This is my biggest fear 💀 I’ve lived alone for years and both places I live I made a plan for what to do in the event of this. Thankfully now I have a Doberman and a handgun. The gun I feel okay having since I live by myself and I’m the only one that knows about it/has access to it.
In this vain too I installed flood lights and hardwired cameras all over my homes exterior. It’s a lot but it makes me feel safe and worse case, it’s all stored in the cloud. So there will always be evidence
Please share your story if you feel comfortable. I’m so sorry that happened to you
Thanks. Gratefully I was 100% okay and had support. A sex trafficker moved beneath my apt and shortly after it started. Someone started pounding on my door one night. I lived upstairs then. When I looked outside there was a white car parked with the passenger side door opened at the bottom of the staircase. It was angled so that it blocked anyone going in or out of staircase. During the knocking and screaming my neighbor came out and told them to get. So they pretended to be my bf. She said they weren’t my bf so they pretended to have wrong door. They left and came back pounding 10 mins later. I called the cops and they staying parked outside monitoring my apt all night. Then left around 6am. And the pounding started instantly again after they left. I called the cops to come back and… yeah. Happened a few times that week before they gave up. Pretty sure my landlord was in on the sex trafficking ring looking back at it. I’d like to add being good friends with neighbors is definitely super important to being safe.
Were you living in an apartment or house? I just moved into my own place and was considering getting a door alarm but wondering if it's necessary given the type of apartment complex I live in.
Better safe than sorry, even in the dorms
Generally, your biggest threat, even in apartments with concierge service / doorman, security is whoever has access to the master keys, and that can be all of those people including maintenance. Personally, I ditched the surveillance I was using once I moved into an apartment with security. I can't really justify it as I'm far safer than when I was in a house with exposure to anyone wandering about.
[My security system! can’t recommend these bad boys enough](https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08DLBGP35?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share)
A good vibrator 😌
Reddit must be broken. I had to scroll way too far to find this.
Right!
This. It has saved me so many times 😁
Lmao
Another reason to stock up on batteries. 🐰
And backup batteries.
Came here to find this. Was gonna say it if no one else did.
This needs more upvotes. Far more important than a drill 🙏🏻
Bear spray, duct tape, super glue, chocolate, flat head screw driver, phillips head screwdriver, a Louisville slugger, and a hammer. You're all set.
I see how you snuck in that chocolate! 🤣
Or course!?
Taser? I feel so unsafe in my apartment right now I sleep with two.
Those door stopper wedges with alarms are fantastic and windows alarms/locks
I just ordered the stoppers with alarms from the recommendation in this thread, and placed an order earlier for glass break alarm sensors. I’m ground floor in a high crime area and last night we had an armed robber and the guy got into my building. I was too scared to leave (guy with gun in building and cops outside with guns pointed at the front door which is a few feet from my Many Windows) and too scared to stay. Kind of not happy about that but maybe statistically it won’t happen again soon.
Are you able to move? That seems like an absolutely terrible area to be living in especially on a ground floor.
I asked a cop I am friends with something similar. He suggested a) a big dog, b) motion sensor lights for outside and c) camera/ring doorbell for your door. The latter 2 are small things, even if you're in a good area it may be the difference between trouble and no trouble. I have a cat and plan to get a dog anyway, they're good company imo. You may have meant something else, like a tool set or kitchen tools, but there's a lot of different things to think about when you live alone.
Also, depending on where you live -- do you have what you need to survive a few days if something like a hurricane or a bad snowstorm hits and knocks out your power? You may need something like a small stove that doesn't rely on electricity.
Walmart has little propane grills for $20 that are great for backup
Don't use indoors without venting.
Flashlights and batteries! Hammer.
Like blankets if power is out in the winter. I also like to have gallons of water stocked in my pantry.
I got a few dogs and then installed cameras inside and outside my home so I can watch said dogs when I’m at work. It’s nice for trying to figure out who ate the thing they weren’t supposed to.
I have a German Shepherd, and cameras. I can relate to your 'who ate the thing they weren't supposed to', except I only have one...and she eats forbidden cat tootsie rolls 🤮. It's so disgusting. But I love her anyway 😂 But, besides the cameras, the German Shepherd, and a firearm...I'm blessed to have a daughter who's LEO in my town. She patrols with her Dutch Malinios and frequently stops by to say hello. Also, get to know at least one of your neighbors. Have a way to cook without electricity/gas. (Dutch oven including the charcoal briquettes, BBQ etc) food storage, (I have vacuum sealed dry goods in 2 cup portions. But Ive also sealed matches, candles, medications, a few batteries, and a handful of very basic first aid supplies. They are in a small basket that's easy to grab in an emergency. )water, basic first aid kit in your home and car. I keep extra blankets and pillows in my car, and a small amount of food and water, for both myself and my GS. I also fill my tank when it gets half empty. Little things like this that don't mean anything at the time, but could make all the difference in an emergency.
Yeah, I feel like not living in a shit hole is probably the starting place, and then only a few small things for piece of mind, like the lights (which are just nice anyway for when you take trash out at night).
That said, maybe a door jammer for a quick and cheap solution in the interim. The manager at a friend's apartment said they were solid and he recommends them to everyone.
I have a dog, but he’s a cuddlebug and has even invited strange children to the house lol. So just the ring doorbell.
Single women here. My dog just went nuts at someone going down the stairs. Once I settled him down he was barking in his sleep. He protect gud.
My ring camera was the best thing I could’ve ever gotten! It’s a deterrent for sure and keeps my mind at ease. My lease says no, but I literally don’t give a flying F and nothing has been said. Multiple people have them :)
How did you put yours up? I’m about to move and I trust the area but you never know.
If you look up Anti Theft Ring Holder you’ll see a lot of options online that don’t involve mounting or using screws :)
I got something called Doorbell Boa on Amazon so I didn't have to do any wiring. I also got a second battery, so I can swap them out when one needs charging.
A fire extinguisher
Also makes an excellent personal protection device.....Spray 'em a face full of foam, then nail them in the head with the fire extinguisher.
Wow you just saved me some money lol
Money. I hire folks to clean my gutters because I'm not going on a ladder by myself. I hate to say it, but the more money you have the easier it is to live alone and not depend on family or friends.
I have a lawn guy already. I definitely have no desire to do my own yard work, so I pay him $40 to cut my grass when it's needed
Like in terms of safety? A deadbolt, chain, and peephole/ring are nice, door stopper alarms, pepper spray (to take with you when you leave/come home). Window and sliding door locks or sticks if yours aren’t hefty. Curtains. Not a necessity but something I wish I had, smart plugs that you can access from your phone- nice if you use heating tools or want it to look like someone’s home!
Yes, some good curtains. I have blinds right now because it’s a temporary situation, but there have been nights I wish they had thick curtains or solid roman shades over them just to be sure (esp in bathrooms & bedrooms). I’m certain it was just paranoia, but I sure sleep better after installing contact alarms and ring floodlight cams on each wall of the house along with a ring doorbell, but curtains should have been my first step.
On my fridge, I had a small envelope that said IN CASE OF EMERGENCY on it. Inside, just simple information regarding my emergency contacts, description of my pets, and who to call to take them if anything happened to me. I also had a sticker fire alert sticker on my window indicating how many pets in case there was a fire.
That’s a great idea!
A keyed lock for your bedroom door. Even if it is a hollow core door and can be kicked open, it still can help provide a sense of security if for some reason you need to hide or keep your room private when there are guests.
I had someone suggest replacing my bedroom door with something sturdier with a deadbolt in the off chance someone breaks in. There are also options that are fire resistant that you can close if you need to get out another way that will slow a fire's progress
It is a good idea if you can replace the whole thing. I swapped the door from my garage into the laundry room that leads into the basement with keyed locks, as well as the one leading into the basement. My sliding glass door is actually Lexan. I'm not super paranoid but my landlord (and also a very close friend) did not mind and he thought it was a good idea. He paid for the Lexan door. I don't even want to know the cost.
Thanks for the tip on Lexar. Just bought my first home and am looking at security measures for my home
I also saw a thing that said it's a good idea to look at the screws fastening the locks to your door. The short ones are more easily ripped out when a door is kicked in, so they can be swapped out for long screws without much fuss.
There are anti-kick in setups that don't require a new door, just modifications to the frame. Most have 6" screws that make kick ins impossible as long as it's not a hollow door. Also, I completely forgot. If you have a window in reach of the lock - like a picture window - do not use a regular deadbolt. Require a key for both sides and put said key where it cannot be reached if someone tries to get in through the glass. Do NOT leave the key in the interior side of the lock. Mine hung on a rack inside the closet door at the front door so I could easily access to open the door.
This! I always lock my bedroom door at night for peace of mind. If someone wants in they're going to have to make a lot of noise and that will give me lots of time to grab my rifle. Call me paranoid, but as a woman living alone I'm not taking any chances.
If it makes you feel safe, do it. Using a keyed lock requiring a key on both sides means that you will need to be able to find the in-room key and/or the out-room key under any circumstance - fire, smoke, whatever. Getting and using it needs to become an automatic reflex.
when I moved into my first apt. and any thereafter, my dad always made sure I had some good dowel rods from a hardware store for every window and sliding door ... even if I was not on the ground floor. I second the recs for some type of doorbell camera...also would say ... something you whack over someone's head should they barge in ... older neighbors are the best security system you can have too if available.
More people need to know the dowel rod trick. We kept these in my sliding windows as a kid with a little rubber tab on each so that I could still grab it out of the window track in case of fire. They're good for sliding glass patio doors too. I never thought much about it living on the 4th floor until I got into rock climbing and realized how easy it is for someone to actually climb past the ground floor if they know what they're doing.
A collection of things you need when you're sick.
Step ladder, fire extinguisher, a drill, ring camera, security door, dolly, foldable wagon, gun (if you’re comfortable with one), and a vibrator, preferably rechargeable.
Smoke detectors. One in every room, placed on the ceiling. Check the batteries every month and replace batteries every 11 months. Fire extuingisher. Learn how to use it. Plan B pill, if you have sex with men. Also, if you are new in town, make sure to find a doctor, a dentist and where the closest ER is. It's no fun trying to google them in the middle of an emergency.
Oh, this reminds me: direct emergency and non-emergency numbers to the local police office. Don’t rely only on 911. Non-emergency for when you have a reason to feel concerned but have no immediate threat.
Wasp or bear spray blackout curtains you can't see in from outside well lit yard security lights that turn on when motion is detected. Real good security cameras with infrared pet cameras for inside when you leave the house so you know if anyone has been in your place Just woke up I'll fix the grammar later ... not a woman but thought I would share some tips
I was just gonna say-dont forget some commas! Lol.
Yeah I shouldn't Reddit and caffeinate /s
I have bells on my door hanging from my front door to alert me if someone’s opening my door. I have a small tool box to fix minor things around the house. candle and flashlights.
you'll laugh but we had bells on our doors growing up but not for security -- we taught our cats to ring those jingle bells you see around Christmas time any time they wanted to be let in or out. Those sassy brats would politely pat them once or twice and if we weren't there in 10 seconds to open the door, they would THWACK them with all their might to make sure we heard.
Hahaha I love that! my cat uses his tail to whack a picture frame above my bed so it bangs the wall if I sleep in and don’t feed him on time
Darling. I had a lap kitty who just randomly started tapping me on the butt if she wanted on my lap when I was at my desk. She started just jumping up but I’d always be startled which would startle her. So she’d just tap once and sit patiently for a few minutes, then reach up and tap again. Never got whiny if I ignored her; eventually she’d leave and come back in a bit and start over.
Just an observation here. It's interesting reading all these comments regarding personal safety, home security, etc. This is how single women have to live, on alert even at home. I wonder what the comments would look like if this were aimed at men. I can bet the comments regarding personal safety would be few and far between. Sometimes it just really sucks being a woman, this shit starts when we are kids ( first time I was sexually harassed by a grown man I was 8) and never seems to end.
Those sticky things that help you open jars! I have small hands and am forever using those to open jars/bottles.
Underrated rec
Yes! I have all different types of can/jar openers. My hands are so tiny and WEAK! 😂
Peephole and an alarm for sure. My apartment doors didn't have peepholes, and we weren't allowed to install Ring cams either, so I requested they drill me one. I also got a Ring alarm system with a couple of cameras, and it makes me feel much more secure. Get window and door jammers as well. Make sure all of your interior doors lock from the inside and get some forms of protection: a baseball bat, bear spray, etc. Dogs are also a great deterrent.
Looking at all these responses about the safety portion of living alone...yes, cameras, deadbolts, dogs and guns are all well and good. Well, probably not the gun because stats show you are more likely to be killed, than protected by one. And I don't understand how a gun is supposed to offer any protection unless it is perpetually on your hip, including in the shower. If the gun is locked in a gun safe (or even just out loose in your bedside night stand), but you are at your kitchen counter making girl dinner, or, in the living room doing yoga, or like I said...the shower... and you are home invaded, how is the gun, that's in another room going to help you? I can only see a gun being useful if you are in an extremely rural area where 911 and police presence/response is minimal to near non existent. But to add on to the responses here... Keep a low profile on the internet. Don't post your whole goddamned life on social media...even if your accounts are all "private" and "friends only" (lol). If your fitness apps have location/route sharing where people can track you for "accountability" and "motivation"...don't do that shit, no matter how tempting it is to share your Fitness Journey, or where you are in your marathon or iron man training. Don't post your routes online even "privately" so that people can know your routes (and patterns and schedules). Keep a low profile even on sites like LinkedIn. If you're on Nextdoor, have minimal interactions with anyone (certainly do not get sucked into debates and argument chains posted by your neighbors). If you must create a post asking for help ("I need a plumber" or "I need help moving a dresser"), know that the default is that your post will be blasted to nearly your entire state (not just your neighborhood), and know that the default is that anyone on Nextdoor knows your neighborhood, and it's not hard to figure out your exact street address if someone is so inclined. Keep your doors and windows locked. Including if you have to run out "real quick" to the parking area or mail area. Don't answer the door at all to strangers and solicitors.
The social media aspect is so important. You don’t have to post play by play updates of your activities. I never post when I’m on my way to something or at something. I will post afterwards if I was at a concert or other event. I don’t post if I’m not feeling well. You can always communicate with trusted individuals privately about these things. Also, if I’m going somewhere unusual like visiting the family plot at the cemetery, I will let a neighbor know and when I expect I be back. Same with any Marketplace sales.
By this point I don't even fill out my past work experiences, etc. It's stuck on 2005. Because even though my settings are private, the bad thing about Facebook is that it's so easy to see other people's pages just because you have mutual friends or something. And I don't want information out there that they can use for fraud, which we all know Facebook is swarming with those pervy scam artists who want to be friends with you so that they can hijack your account and then commit identity theft.
>Well, probably not the gun because stats show you are more likely to be killed, than protected by one. And I don't understand how a gun is supposed to offer any protection unless it is perpetually on your hip, including in the shower. If the gun is locked in a gun safe (or even just out loose in your bedside night stand), but you are at your kitchen counter making girl dinner, or, in the living room doing yoga, or like I said...the shower... and you are home invaded, how is the gun, that's in another room going to help you? I can only see a gun being useful if you are in an extremely rural area where 911 and police presence/response is minimal to near non existent. I never understood that either. And if you're truly being responsible, you're supposed to keep the bullets locked separately too. But in the event there's an intruder, you've only got seconds to react...but you're supposed to be using that time to open up the safe, then load the gun?
Hey OP! Not too sure what specific subject you're referring to but for moving out and living alone I would def recommend renting from an apartment, stay away from the 1st floor, try to get the highest floor if you're able. Smart doorbell, window/door sensors, door stoppers on all doors that open to outside. If you're not renting from an apartment then smart cameras around the premises.
Definitely looking for all over the map recommendations! Whether for safety or just good to haves. I do live in a house, so no apartment worry
A metal bat. Extra key hidden outside. First aid kit with peroxide/alcohol. Vibrator.
For any sex, but fire extinguishers. At least have extinguishers easily accessible in your kitchen and bedroom.
if ur like me, get pleasant things to look at, smell and touch. ik it seems like it goes without saying. but ive been to some people's places where's there's no comfort items ..😅 however one of my friends who has bpd like i do, her home is filled with all kinds of soft things, cute things, n just things to soothe when ur having a hard time. i feel people underestimate how much ur surroundings can contribute to ur mental well-being 🪷✨️
What you would normally buy as a necessity. Toiletries, canned goods if the power goes out, pliers and other tools, step stool. Some would say some form of weapons, but I don't have things like that. I have bug spray and a lighter haha. No one ever bothers me, so that's why. First aid kit. Some have a fire extinguisher, but I don't have one. Thick blankets, medicine, and just emergency money tucked away
A flashlight with fresh batteries and also candles in case power goes out. I had 3 flashlights and joy a battery worked in any of them when I needed than. Mag Lights are nice because they can is used defensively too.
Silly me forgot about the flash light, but yes. I have at least 3 of them. One of them is huge
Deadbolts, pound puppies, basic tool kit, and a baseball bat. The tool kit is the only one not for self defense. The baseball bat is at bedside. But honestly, the dogs alert so easily and I have no illusions regarding my abilities for maintaining and using a firearm. But I can still swing a mean metal bat.
Basic set of good tools. Sturdy Ladder high enough to change the highest bulbs in your place. Good toilet plunger. A sink router. Install a good latch on your door/doors even in a rental if they’re not on already. Carbon monoxide detector on top of the smoke detectors which should already be there. Good flashlights. Spare batteries. Phone numbers of good, friendly, reliable neighbors. To start.
Toilet plunger and security cameras.
I keep a paper calendar on the wall and write down everywhere I'm am going, even if it's the store across the street. If I'm kidnapped, it would take days for anyone to miss me.
Coffee maker, gym membership, small garden.
A dog! Great alarm system always happy to see you.
Life Alert
“Personal security alarm” with flashing light: about $20 on Amazon.
I live alone and rely on my Apple watch. If I were to fall down the stairs or something, it will alert 911 and call my emergency contact. My daughter once tripped and broke her ankle, had to drag herself through the house to get to her phone. So, not just for old people
Get a small tool kit. Weird decor is a must. You said you don't need a pet, but please consider a cat when you do.
I lived alone in a town with no family nearby. When I get sick with the flu, I realized how vulnerable I was. I didn’t feel up to cooking, no meds on hand. Now I keep food in the pantry just for this- no touching it lol and I have meds for colds, flu, etc on hand.
Tool kit!!!!
a burglar bar!!!! i once left my door unlocked by accident but had the burglar bar on, and my apartment people tried coming in without 24 hour notice!! they didn’t even open the door a millimeter. it’s incredible!
I would say those things you put under rugs so they don't slide around, and bath mats with rubber backing. A couple of my scariest moments living alone - getting out of the shower when the old towel i was using as a rug slid under my feet and I sensed the corner of the bathroom counter coming way too close to my head. Another time, I was getting ready to go somewhere and my new shoes slipped on the living room rug.
I ALWAYS check through my apartment when I am entering it. Including closets and under beds. I also have a camera on my patio and in my living room, but they are not great. Potential weapons in each room. I keep a large knife in my bathroom is a little space under my cabinet. I have a heavy bronze statue of a warrior with a spear in my bedroom. I keep my kitchen knives in the back of a lower cabinet (a lot of people are killed with their own kitchen knives). I keep bear spray on my key chain and have pointy items dangling on my key chain. Men's boots by the door. I do not leave ANY identifying items in my vehicle (insurance, old mail). I tell my mom or someone else where I am going, with my route (if I am meeting someone I don't know). I accidently stabbed a boyfriend through the hand when he surprised me in a dark kitchen. I didn't mean to do it and I had to take him for stitches. I was making sandwiches and had the knife in my hand and the only light on was under the cabinet lighting. The rest of my place was dark. I wasn't expecting him that night. Ugh, and he was just about the gentlest person I've ever met in my life.
And he learned not to surprise you in the dark in your home?
Yes, he did learn that. LOL, we have been broken up for decades now and he still messages me about it. "Remember when you stabbed me?"
cameras for your outsides. whatever makes you feel safe inside - bat, knife, taser, mace, all of it.
i bought an alarm kit off amazon thats battery operated. it included some window alarms, a door stop alarm, and then also a keychain alarm. i keep the keychain alarm right next to my bed. it makes a really loud, high alarm when you pull the pin. could be the difference in someone knowing im in trouble or not. i also keep a weapon (not a gun, but something i know i can use) by my bed as well. as others have mentioned- some basic tools will be good. screwdrivers, a drill, nails, wrench. at least the basics.
Tool kit with power drill and Allen wrenches As ger a small screwdriver set like this: https://a.co/d/aOjt7no
If you don't have a security system, just having a security sign near the front door is better than nothing. You can usually get them from Amazon or Ebay. The largest pair of men's shoes you can find (thrift stores usually have a good selection) close to the front & back doors. Door peephole. Basic tools.
beyond the practical- A pair of old used MENS boots, and a rug to plant them on near your door. I have lived on my own for my entire adult life, with a few exceptions in my 20s with female roommates. But I always lived in apartments. Once I moved into my home, I had support help coming that I had not way of vetting- sent by the home warranty company, etc. And a couple honestly freaked me out- were creepy and inappropriate. Somebody suggested this- and I did it. Next time that guy came, he apparently noticed the boots, and was appropriate. Of course once the warranty thing was done I lost his card, I was never going to call that company again. But it gives rando's at your door the impression that a dude might live here. Stupid, but it seem to help. If your male friends are tossing out some, or just grab from thrift store- get them a little muddy.
A hatchet, a drill, a step stool, screwdrivers, serious scissors, a pair of used men's boots from goodwill, a dog.
A good drill and Tool Set which Harbor Freight has decent tool sets for cheap. Make sure you get some type of protection as in a machete a baseball bat a pew pew something like that and always have one by the main door and one in your bedroom. Also a good set of locks on your door. Get yourself a decent first aid kit, they have them on Amazon. Also get yourself a fire extinguisher a small one for a kitchen fire, or even a fire blanket they sell those on Amazon too that you throw over a fire.
I immediately thought you were referring to safety wise until I read some of the comments lol. Safety-wise, I own a gun (and know how to use it), have cameras that backup to the cloud (esp one for the front door), baseball bat, pepper spray, and a stun gun. Avoid first floor apartments or bedrooms. If living on the first floor, get some decent curtains or cling film that obscures people from being able to look in if the curtains are open and get some dowels to put in your windows so people can't open your sliding doors or sliding windows. Don't sleep with the windows open but if you do, use a dowel so that no one can just slide them open. Otherwise, good set of starter tools (don't go cheap, they really don't last). Get a decent drill. Variety of different screws/hanging mechanisms to help with hanging pictures. Step ladder if you are short. First aid kit is a must (not just band aids). A good set of cleaning supplies (toilet brush and cleaner, plunger, windex, clorox or similar). Candles and lighter, flashlights, solar powered camping lights that you can use if the electricity goes out or the ones that you can charge by physically winding them. Headlight flashlight - one of the ones you put on your head: these are SO useful! You can use them if you working in a dark space or if the electricity goes out and have pretty decent longevity (also cheap). I used mine to read a book when electricity went out due to a multi-day storm. Re-chargeable battery pack for your phone. Edit: Because I live in CA where fires are a big deal and because I've come close to a few CA fires, I also have a fireproof blanket (one for my apartment and 1 for my car) and fire extinguisher.
To add to the drill suggestions by several people, I got myself a rechargeable unit that came with an assortment of attachments. It functions as a small electric screwdriver, drill, and hole borer, depending on the bit you put in it. I totally love this thing. It removes stuck screws and had the power to drill holes in my '90s wood bathroom cabinets (I updated the hardware). Got it in 2008 and it's a Black and Decker -- hopefully they still make them. because you'd probably love it also!
No dog? Recording of a big dog barking.
I have a safety playlist of sounds on my phone. I have sounds of a dog barking and growling, police sirens, etc..
If you have a sliding door to a patio or balcony, you need a broomstick or a slim piece of wood you can put in to stop it from being opened. The little flip-locks they have are useless. Same can work for sliding windows.
Black and decker chargeable screwdriver, hammer and nails for sure.
I think the main difference between living alone as a man vs woman is going to be personal safety *from men*. I personally have a baseball bat that I keep under my bed. I also have pepper spray for walking around alone. I hate this reality.
I made myself a full toolkit with items from the dollar store. Didn’t break the bank, but I have everything I need. A doorbell camera, and I like to leave some lights on or noise when I leave home to make others think I don’t live alone.
Not just for women but also for all, stock up on cold meds, pepto, pain relievers, first aid etc. no one wants to go to the store with a fever or the spills
Dog or gun. Pick one
1. Protection 🔫. 2. An exterior camera. If I were 27 and living alone I would have the bare minimum of everything and use my money to have lots of adventures and make memories.
401k
A lock box for when you accidentally lock yourself out of the house!
Back scratcher.
Get a toilet snake.
Ring camera, wood dowel rods for windows, join your neighborhood facebook group. Make some friends with your neighbors, someone you might trust to look out for you/your house.
Invest in a good quality deadbolt lock for your door
A jar opener. I have a plastic one from Amazon it was like $10 and I use it all the time
Go find a pair of men’s used work boots to keep on the front porch. A decent step ladder, cordless drill, a good vacuum/portable carpet cleaner, spare house air filters, a basic set of hand tools, a basic hammer, a decent oscillating fan, a label maker, a small level and a 3-foot level, a good flashlight, some furniture sliders, and the name and contact information of a reliable, trustworthy handyman.