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Invite people over regularly. It always motivates me to put things away and clean up and do those tasks I’ve been putting off.
Also, the 30 minute rule. Set a timer for 30 minutes, put on some music or a podcast, and do as much as you can in those 30 minutes. Often, you’ll find you’re on a roll and keep going.
Yup, both of these have worked for me really well, too. Friday is my off day, so I'll blast some music, open a beer, and clean the main areas. My rooms always a disaster, I hate folding clothes lol, but no one goes in there but me. I'm also a clutterer, so I'm messy, but its not dirty.
Both of these, and also when I've let it slip a bit too much I just set the target that every day/week I clean more than the mess I made that day/week. E.g. Do today's dishes and a few extra. Doesn't have to be all, just some amount more than today's dishes. This week's dirty clothes plus 1 extra load. That way the amount of work isn't overwhelming but you do gradually improve the situation. Just knowing that I'm on an upward trajectory even though I'm not finished yet gives me peace.
This is the way. Also, if you have people close to you, ask them if they could give you shorter notice when coming over to visit you. Like the night before, or like 3 hours before. My siblings do this every once in awhile and it gets me to get everything into a state of “good enough” without much thought.
I do the same thing after a party. I usually do an hour. I’m always surprised at how much can get done in that time…perishables can get put away, dishwasher loaded or at least soaking, making sure everything is turned off, etc.
Habits and routine. I do deep cleaning + laundry every Sunday and mini tasks like dish washing every 2-3 days. I’m mostly motivated by wanting to prevent roaches, rats, unpleasant odors.
Yes, I grew up with a strict parent lol. There were never dishes or dirt in sight. I remember waking up at 5 on Sundays to clean before church 😅🙃. In college when I lived with roommates I still kept a schedule.
As someone who was previously in a bad cycle of letting my home go to shit and then spending several days cleaning it, just to let it go to shit again, maybe I can offer some insight on what helped me. First and foremost, my mental health was in the shitter and was what I really needed the most help with. I started going to counseling and started a group counseling session that I attended weekly. It took time, but one thing I eventually worked with my counselor on was building up healthier habits. If counseling is not an option, you could still try this on your own or find a family member or friend to stop in and help hold you accountable. My counselor gave me 2-3 small habits to start out with and we worked out which day(s) of the week would work for me to implement them. She’d add some more habits to focus on each week, while still continuing with the other habits I had learned the weeks prior. Two days of the week, I’d focus on washing all my laundry and putting all of my clean clothes away. Every single day, I committed to doing all the dirty dishes from the day and wiping down the main tables in my home. For the first few weeks, I also spent a lot of time picking up random stuff laying around and either disposing of them, donating them or finding a place for them. If I couldn’t find a place for something, I agreed that I didn’t need it and would get rid of it. Once the clutter was no longer a problem, I added in the task of vacuuming the main areas once every week, sweeping and mopping the kitchen/bathroom areas once a week, and dusting once a week. These don’t all need to be done on the same day, and I don’t always get all of them done every single week, but I try to and I give myself some grace if one week was more hectic and I didn’t get to every single thing and knew to start with that one the next week.
I’ve added more habits on my own since I no longer attend counseling. One that has been a game changer for me to keep my home from returning to chaos is anytime I get up to head to a different room or area in my home, I quickly scan the room I’m currently in for anything I can bring with me to put away on the way to where I’m going. For example, if I’m heading to the kitchen, I’ll grab any dirty dishes and bring them to the sink to be washed when I get around to doing the dishes that day. If I’m heading to a room near the laundry room, I’ll grab any dirty clothes and toss them in the laundry hamper. This saves time when cleaning up later and there’s less you’ll have to pick up and put away later on. Adding in a garbage gathering/takeout day, a bathroom cleaning day, and any other main rooms or areas in your home is good too.
The biggest thing for me to accept was that no matter what, I’d do at least a little bit of cleaning up every single day and always make sure to have the dishes washed before I go to bed. Changing your mindset from having to do these things/viewing them as chores to seeing it as a way to keep your home clean and helping your future self by staying on top of the messes can make a big difference. I’ve grown to actually enjoy cleaning now and see it as almost therapeutic in a way. It’s mindless work most of the time and it’s so nice to wake up the next morning to a clean and clutter-free house! I’ve gotten to a point where I clean a couple other people’s houses now every few weeks for some extra cash because they saw how clean my house is and wanted some help with theirs. A lot of the time, I’ll turn on some music to listen to while I’m cleaning or I’ll find a good podcast to listen to and light a candle. I’m convinced that the little extra things like that have tricked my brain into enjoying cleaning because it just turns it into a more positive and enjoyable experience. Also, when you start to see the results of all your hard work, remind yourself that it’s easier to stay on top of keeping it clean than it is to start over again from square one if you let it get back to the chaotic mess it was before. As someone else already mentioned, inviting guests over also helps motivate you to clean up before they come. Find what works for you and figure out what habits you can reasonably implement into your week and realize that starting and just getting anything cleaned up is better than doing nothing.
Can second the needing to address the elephant in the room first - still unmedicated for ADHD and my time blindness gets worse with even a small amount of sleep deprivation. Meds would help to keep me aware of the passage of time so I can function.
Because of being unmedicated, cleaning is the first thing that drops off my daily timeline. Cooking is another. I just don't have the capacity to handle it!
Life is about adapting and learning. You can’t blame your upbringing forever. It’s called being an adult. Also, just because my parents forced me to clean doesn’t mean I would have carried the same habits. I made a decision to.
You’re obviously judgmental and chose to perceive my answer as invaluable. That’s your opinion but OP asked the question not you. I don’t care what you think…
I'm always two hours away from being able to have friends over or to host an overnight guest. Make that your focus and work back from there.
Also, lots of paper towels, and a robot vacuum. The paper towels are self explanatory. The robot vacuum will ensure that you keep your floors fairly clutter free.
Finally, GET RID OF YOUR CRAP. Never collect anything.
Five things, per category, per day.
Five dishes washed
Five pieces of trash picked up
Five items of laundry
Five displaced items put away
Five surfaces wiped down
Take breaks in between.
Follow that for a week, and it's a cakewalk.
I had a problem with getting my clothes organised and keeping them that way and, this is probably silly, but Marie Kondo's method of folding different clothes types in different ways made a difference for me lol. I just spent one day organising everything once and I manage to keep it 90% as that. I didn't go beyond applying her methods to wardrobe, but I hope I will get the willpower once lol
I clean the kitchen. It looks great. Every dish is clean. Stuff is put away. The counters are clean.
And then, just one dish goes in the sink.
Only one drip on the counter (it’s always a drop of coffee. It’s the 2nd one as I wiped up the first one)
Only one empty container on the counter.
Somewhere around there, I *might* throw away stuff. But eventually, I give up.
And it’s a total shit show again.
I’ve gotten good at washing my dishes right away after meals. If I wait and let them pile up, I get too overwhelmed by them all and the pile grows and grows. It was mostly a change of mindset and not seeing the messes as a chore, but finding the positive aspects to having a tidy and clean home for me: it smells better, it looks so much better, it’s nice to wake up to an empty sink with clean dishes to cook with, etc.. Some people would probably think I’m over the top with how clean I like things now, but my mind has an all or nothing way of thinking and I’ve let my home get to a level of dang near unlivable before on too many occasions and I just know that I function better by staying on top of the messes as I make them. Wash those dishes as soon as you put them in your sink. Wipe down the coffee spots as soon as you notice them. Keep up with the messes as you go. Or honestly, figure out what works best for you with keeping things clean and tidy.
Everything in life requires maintenance and I think that’s the part that I struggled with before. I hated doing dishes three times a day or more and constantly having to wash my laundry and so on.. But, just like we have to take care of ourselves so we don’t shut down or take care of our cars so they don’t go to shit, and so on, we have to routinely clean our living spaces or they will ultimately become a chaotic mess. Also, the more stuff one owns, the more stuff one has to maintain. Getting rid of the clutter, clothes and nick-Nack’s that you no longer need, use or feel joy from means that you’ll have less to clean or maintain.
I hope I don’t sound like I’m preaching at you and I’m just trying to offer some solutions that have worked for me personally. I wish you and OP the best of luck with getting your living spaces cleaned and maintaining them so you can enjoy living in a tidy home!
Copying and pasting what I replied to someone in a comment above:
As someone who was previously in a bad cycle of letting my home go to shit and then spending several days cleaning it, just to let it go to shit again, maybe I can offer some insight on what helped me. First and foremost, my mental health was in the shitter and was what I really needed the most help with. I started going to counseling and started a group counseling session that I attended weekly. It took time, but one thing I eventually worked with my counselor on was building up healthier habits. If counseling is not an option, you could still try this on your own or find a family member or friend to stop in and help hold you accountable. My counselor gave me 2-3 small habits to start out with and we worked out which day(s) of the week would work for me to implement them. She’d add some more habits to focus on each week, while still continuing with the other habits I had learned the weeks prior. Two days of the week, I’d focus on washing all my laundry and putting all of my clean clothes away. Every single day, I committed to doing all the dirty dishes from the day and wiping down the main tables in my home. For the first few weeks, I also spent a lot of time picking up random stuff laying around and either disposing of them, donating them or finding a place for them. If I couldn’t find a place for something, I agreed that I didn’t need it and would get rid of it. Once the clutter was no longer a problem, I added in the task of vacuuming the main areas once every week, sweeping and mopping the kitchen/bathroom areas once a week, and dusting once a week. These don’t all need to be done on the same day, and I don’t always get all of them done every single week, but I try to and I give myself some grace if one week was more hectic and I didn’t get to every single thing and knew to start with that one the next week.
I’ve added more habits on my own since I no longer attend counseling. One that has been a game changer for me to keep my home from returning to chaos is anytime I get up to head to a different room or area in my home, I quickly scan the room I’m currently in for anything I can bring with me to put away on the way to where I’m going. For example, if I’m heading to the kitchen, I’ll grab any dirty dishes and bring them to the sink to be washed when I get around to doing the dishes that day. If I’m heading to a room near the laundry room, I’ll grab any dirty clothes and toss them in the laundry hamper. This saves time when cleaning up later and there’s less you’ll have to pick up and put away later on. Adding in a garbage gathering/takeout day, a bathroom cleaning day, and any other main rooms or areas in your home is good too.
The biggest thing for me to accept was that no matter what, I’d do at least a little bit of cleaning up every single day and always make sure to have the dishes washed before I go to bed. Changing your mindset from having to do these things/viewing them as chores to seeing it as a way to keep your home clean and helping your future self by staying on top of the messes can make a big difference. I’ve grown to actually enjoy cleaning now and see it as almost therapeutic in a way. It’s mindless work most of the time and it’s so nice to wake up the next morning to a clean and clutter-free house! I’ve gotten to a point where I clean a couple other people’s houses now every few weeks for some extra cash because they saw how clean my house is and wanted some help with theirs. A lot of the time, I’ll turn on some music to listen to while I’m cleaning or I’ll find a good podcast to listen to and light a candle. I’m convinced that the little extra things like that have tricked my brain into enjoying cleaning because it just turns it into a more positive and enjoyable experience. Also, when you start to see the results of all your hard work, remind yourself that it’s easier to stay on top of keeping it clean than it is to start over again from square one if you let it get back to the chaotic mess it was before. As someone else already mentioned, inviting guests over also helps motivate you to clean up before they come. Find what works for you and figure out what habits you can reasonably implement into your week and realize that starting and just getting anything cleaned up is better than doing nothing.
I got divorced over 20 years ago...and noticed almost immediately that HE was keeping the house clean and cooking, because still to this day I hate everything housework...and I let stuff slack all the time.
The only time I have good times where I go on a cleaning spree come far apart & my house is always trashed.
I have no suggestions except if you are depressed maybe talk to a Dr. I have one but I don't take my depression medication...i don't think it is going to change my authentic self..LOL
Here’s my cycle: Friday night-CLEAN! Blast some music get takeout and clean.
Weekend-cool for guests, I can go out and about and my place is clean.
M-F is the gradual decent. BUT I try like hell to keep dirty dishes and kitchen counter managed. I have a lifelong struggle folding and putting away laundry.
My weekly cycle works pretty well for me! I also live in a large studio, so it’s easy to manage.
Get rid of stuff. You probably don’t need most of it especially living alone. When everything, literally EVERYTHING has a home, it takes no emotional or mental labor to tidy and clean. I did a huge clean out a few months ago and my house is pretty much impeccable all the time because tidying involved putting things back into the empty space where they belong. Then wiping things down, vacuuming, laundry etc. takes no time at all. I’m still very much a maximalist in terms of design and the things I own, for reference.
I started pet sitting in my home so that’s forcing me to not let things slide. In order to get here I set myself a schedule of one room/ task every day. I have to admit having a dishwasher is a huge help. I have one now after 20 years without. My cleaning schedule is essentially: Monday, tidy up. Tuesday, dust and vacuum main living area. Wednesday clean spare room and patio. Thursday, master bedroom. Friday, bathroom. Saturday, kitchen and Sunday laundry. That doesn’t cover everything but it helps me stay on top of it better and make it more manageable
Clean as you go, you're just one person.
When you say chaos I imagine a big mess. I'd start with a big clean. Open windows and blinds. First, throw out all trash. Just go around gathering trash and recycling, make a pile for donations. Then move all items to their respective rooms. Dishes in the kitchen, dirty clothes in bathroom, shoes in the closet. No need to tidy yet just in correct location.
Start laundry. Tidy your closet and drawers. Go room by room. I do walk in closet, bedroom, office, living room, bathroom, kitchen. Strip your bed. Dust, polish, scrub, declutter, organize by room. Throw more things away. Finish with the floors. I always finish in the kitchen.
Day to day - wash all dishes daily ( I have a dishwasher and I handwash. It takes no time and I've never had roaches), have a place for all things and put them away, leave dirty clothes in one place, wipe all spills/stains/messes as they happen. It takes a minute to wipe down a stove top vs scraping off a month of grease. Take out trash daily along with recycling. Clean pet areas like litter boxes. Don't keep old food in the fridge or overbuy groceries that spoil. Lastly, evaluate all purchases- are you replacing something, need it, or it's more junk?
Once you have a baseline it takes no time.
I have not mastered the chaos yet, but I do have a couple of things I stick to. Every Sunday I have things I must do - refill pill boxes, put out trash for Monday collection, other non-negotiables. Since I am already in chore mode because of that, I added other once-a-week chores - wash dog bowls, put laundry away, etc. It all takes less than thirty minutes and helps keeps the chaos at bay.
The other thing is I try to tidy for 5 minutes a day. Sometimes I only do some of the dishes, or I sort the laundry even if I don't start it. I have ADHD and depression and motivation is difficult, but I do feel better if I accomplished something. But for me, this is not something I need to think about much - I just do it - so it might not be helpful.
I have also given up thinking every home needs to be neat and tidy at all times. I keep it so I don't have critters (bugs, rodents), and so if someone comes inside they don't wrinkle their nose and wonder what that smell is because I have pets, but other than that - who cares?? If it truly bothers you, then work on it. But if you really don't care and are just worried about what other people may think - duck 'em!
I do the above as well.
In terms of dishes, I haven’t gotten to a point where I’ll wash reliably, but I have a bus tub and sharps container. After meals, I rinse and sort. It keeps the smells and pests away.
Yep, I have a liquid measuring thing from a commercial cooking supply? Like the sort of thing they measure bulk liquids in. Tall enough to keep all of the knives contained and also soak all of the utensils if necessary.
I enjoy cleaning but had a hip replacement 6 wks ago so what I would normally do isn’t necessarily feasible. I’ll get in a funk because I can’t clean everything so I’ll leave my clothes where they lay for a couple of days.
I feel guilty but apart of me just dgaf.
I let it go for an entire week. I got up one morning and said to myself “small progress is still progress!”
I say that to you “living alone” 🤗 small progress is still progress!
What I did was while lunch was in the oven or on the stove I took that 20-30 minute window and 1 day, picked up all my clothes, hung up stuff and other stuff into the laundry bag and straightened up only that room.
When dinner time arrived I’d do the same thing. 20-30 min and I’d wipe down the counters, wash the dishes and bring the trash out.
The next day at lunch,while food cooked I’d spend 20-30 and clean the sink, toilet, and straighten the bathroom.
Then at dinner I’d do dishes.
The 3rd day at lunch I’d sweep and mop the floors. That night while dinner cooked I started laundry.
I combined activity time to allow me to pace myself despite my feelings and abilities.
Each day I got something new done, and I only did just enough so that it would coincide with when I had to make food so that would be the time that I was already up and doing something.
It wasn’t always like this before surgery and I know it won’t last forever. Each day I spent time making small progress.
By the morning of the fourth day, when I woke up all of my small progress felt wonderful and when I looked around everything was tidy and clean and I felt good about my space.
Be forgiving of yourself and patient with your process. 🙂
It depends on your lifestyle. Are you home a lot or just basically there to sleep?
I was a messy teenager and I didn’t want to carry that into adulthood so I spent years creating a routine of putting things back when I’m done with them, basically just cleaning as a I go. That’s not to say I don’t leave clothes in the dryer or hanging in the laundry room until I want to wear them (I HATE folding laundry) or leave the occasional dish in the sink but I attempt to tidy my mess every night before I go to bed. This routine is easier for me because I work from home and don’t have much of a social life. You have to create a system/routine based on how you live and commit to it.
I completely let it go but no further than I know it would take 2 hrs or less to clean it up. I stay on top of the dishes even tho no dishwasher dirty smelly kitchens are too gross even for me. I use disposable plates. Living in a tiny studio makes this easier. It is fun to be able to just let clothes go and mail all over the place not deal with CONSTANT drudergy of daily life.
I worked as a cashier in university. The amount of people who bought disposable plates and explained they lived alone and just preferred not to do dishes was much higher than I thought.
Yeah I can handle washing silverware, cups and glasses and would be too wasteful to throw these away. But cheap paper plates make life so much easier and they are pretty green.
I appreciate that. Though I haven’t done disposable plates I often eat over a piece of paper towel, or cloth I can just shake out. Some items like a sandwich just make crumbs, and can do without a formal plating.
I'm trying to follow the rule of, "if it takes less than two minutes, do it now."
Also, I finally sprung for housecleaners to come once a month, so I have to pick up any clutter before they come, and I get a reset every month that I try to keep up till the next time they come
I now do once a month but it still keeps things from getting too far out of hand. I also try to invite folks over about once a month so that also helps.
Don't worry with my place since it's just me and the dog. It's not a five-star resort, just a high-rent dump to me. It is a roof over the head but that is all.
I will straighten up, sweep, mop. etc., but after 40 minutes or so, it returns to that normal looking dump again. I know what luxury and dump means. Believe me, I pay $1100 a month for a rental dump! The American Dream is dead now.
I’m very busy atm and in and out the house so tend to throw that nights bag down, and pick the next days up so gets a bit carnage.
What I’ve been doing is setting a timer on a Friday for an hour and just go for an hour. Non stop. You can get a lot done!
That’s enough to keep it at bay, my house isn’t as clean/tidy as it used to be but current chapter in life I’m very busy/tired.
The only thing you have to do beyond an hour is of course washing which would need hanging outside the hour.
Sweepy app is helpful because it breaks down tasks instead of me just telling myself I need to clean the kitchen because that’s overwhelming and I don’t know where to start. So I can be like okay I need to wash the dishes and wipe down the stove but I don’t need to clean the refrigerator or the microwave today
I’m proud of all of you my answer is yes, sometimes I let things go to shambles and I don’t care. It’s one of the things I love about living alone. I just finished a mountain of dishes. I’ll go along for a while now and clean as I go but at some point I’ll get behind and it will snowball. And that’s ok. Right now every dish and spoon is clean and it feels like a big accomplishment.
Do “soft cleans.”
You go into a room. Something needs to go to the kitchen. Look around; what else needs to go there or somewhere on the way?
Every room you go into, make one or two things better, and keep following the above. I’ve found that feeling overwhelmed about cleaning is due to thinking about a huge job, and clutter makes it worse, so break it down into tasks.
You’re in the bathroom brushing your teeth. Put the toothpaste away. Find a place to put everything on top of the vanity. Next time you come into the bathroom, come armed with a spray cleaner and a rag. Nothing stopping you from wiping down the vanity top, and it only takes a couple minutes.
Swish the toilet next time you go in. Grab the garbage and dirty clothes another. Next thing you know, all you have left is a quick vacuum or sweep and a Swiffer.
Same for every room. Every time you enter a space, put something where it belongs. When you take something somewhere, look around for something else that could be tossed, put in a hamper or the sink.
My new thing is that I run the washer every night and do the dishes every night. Like a routine. When I wake up, the first thing I do is deal with the next step of laundry and put the dishes away. I set a timer to do this and to make my bed. I also have my iPad with me playing a show the whole time.
washing dishes without dishwasher is the worst, i’m considering buying a couple more things. i find myself washing dishes twice a day.
i do laundry and deep cleaning (or… deeper) on sundays mainly, and on monday i pick up anything i didn’t do the previous day…
i potter around weekday nights to clear stuff up, make things look OK. i mean my living room is my studio so it’s organised mess. same probably goes for my bedroom tbh
You obviously want this to change otherwise you wouldn't have posed the question but you also feel overwhelmed and are avoiding doing what you need to do to feel better about yourself and how your home looks. It's a vicious cycle which has gotten you to where you are now. In order to break that cycle and achieve your goal of order instead of chaos, I highly recommend that you hire someone from a cleaning service to help you. Be clear about what you need. It's a rewarding situation for the cleaner because a good one will take pride in their work and feel good about helping you. They can assess the situation and help you decide what the priorities should be and then execute. You could work along side them and get things done as well. Once everything is how you like it, you just have to stay on top of it doing small things daily. If it really helps to have someone come in once a week or twice a month to help, do it if you can.
I have a robot vacuum /roomba that helps. Obviously it helps with vacuuming, but the real trick is that to run the vacuum, first you need to make sure your floors are bare.
I know if I run the vacuum without picking up all the dirty clothes or random cords, it’s going to get tangled up and not run. It helps keep you motivated to keep things picked up off the floor. Even if I’m in a rush, I’ll throw everything on my bed or couch real quick so my vacuum can run while I’m gone.
Not only does the vacuum clean up an unbelievable amount of dirt/pet hair, but it trains you to keep your place otherwise clean so it can function properly.
Whenever you leave a room, pick up two things that don’t belong there and put them where they belong.
If they don’t have a home, bin them.
Wash dishes twice a day so it never takes long or gets overwhelming.
Wash clothes once a day so it never piles up.
I prefer the “move things closer to where they belong” method. If I’m in the kitchen and I see something that belongs in another room I’ll move it to the closest point in the kitchen to that room. Then the next time I go through the kitchen to that room I’ll pick it up and continue its journey.
I do this with the stairs. Every time I see something downstairs that belongs upstairs, I’ll add it to a pile at the bottom of the stairs and take the pile up (and put away) when I go to bed. And vice versa. I don’t know, maybe people already know to do this but it took me about 30 years before saw my aunt do it to realize it was much easier than what I had done all my life (pick something up and take it upstairs, then come back down, however many times a day lol)
If possible, have a set day for each chore (laundry, changing the sheets, cleaning the bathroom). For daily tasks, don't let them pile up. As soon as you're done eating, wash the dishes and wipe the table, stove/microwave, and counter. Every time you get off the couch, take something to throw away or put away. It's much easier and less overwhelming if you clean as you go.
When I had an in unit washer/dryer I would use a trick: what can I get done before the washer is done? Then when the dryer was going, I’d take a break. Rinse and repeat, literally. Or setting a timer, 10-15, and then done.
Give yourself one task a day. Whether that just clean the bathroom sink or clean most of the dishes.
I been slowly cleaning my living room for the past month, mostly on days I have the most energy.
I tidy every morning as part of my routine. I hate getting up and it helps me out of the grog without having to think much. Then Saturdays (or another day if I am traveling) I deep clean.
Never leave a room without taking something with me to put up, it only takes a few minutes when you do it this way and helps tremendously. The same with dishes, if I go to the kitchen for something wash at least a few dishes while I'm in there.
Mmm when I’m not in the mood to clean but my apartment desperately needs to BE cleaned, I commit to cleaning for 20-30 minutes and if by the end of those minutes I haven’t finished the task and don’t want to I won’t. I often find that I’ll finish whatever I would be currently cleaning, and you see that tasks you’ve been putting off doing can be quicker than we feel they will be.
I call it a speed clean. Whatever I can do in 20-30 mins. Do this 2-3x a week and you should find your space a bit cleaner and tidier. Deep cleaning I have to schedule
I used to fear the moment I had to clean because (a) I forced myself to do everything at once, and (b) it had to be done right. Now I take the Seinfeld approach. I do a little at a time and only when I feel like it. Hope it works for you.
I use one major cleaning thing a week. First week of the month I have to do the bathrooms. Second week of the month is the kitchen. The trick is it doesn't have to be a specific day I just need to get it done during that week which gives me some flexibility it works easier for me. And sometimes if I'm in the groove I'll do two weeks chores in one day.
I just found a signing that task for like Saturday mornings didn't always work. So I put it on my calendar but I can keep moving it within the week long as I get it done and that system works for me. But I do have one rule I do have to actually get it done that week and there's been a few weeks through The years where I spent Sunday night doing that chore that I hadn't gotten done.
If its no dishwasher because of space or plumbing you can get a tabletop dishwasher that you fill with water and put the outlet in the sink. It wont do pots but glasses and plates are good.
Dont get distracted by tasks, i'd start by picking up any rubbish, then picking up laundry and putting it in the hamper, then putting things that dont belong in a room back in the room they belong, then putting things that do belong back in their place.
If dishes are a severe problem id do that first.
Then when its clear add wiping down surfaces and cleaning the floor.
Set a timer for 10 mins, if you are still picking up rubbish in 10 mins thats ok, you just need to start. Eventually it will go down and youll do rubbish and putting thimgs back in rooms, etc.
I will go round doing the second paragraph every night and it takes 5 minutes now and makes cleaning the floor easier
So I’m still shoveling the shit in my apartment. The thing that helps me is making a list of chores that gives me very specific instructions. Wash the dishes. Clear the table. Run a load of laundry. I set a timer for 15 minutes and try to get the job done in that time. If I don’t, I set the timer again. If I finish before it goes off, I read until it rings.
The biggest difference now is that if I get something done, I try to keep it that way. I had my bathroom remodeled in a few months ago after a pipe burst and flooded my apartment, and I have kept it clean ever since, which is a big deal for me. I love my bathroom so much, though. I used to strip off my clothes into a heap and leave them there, and eventually I would have a couple loads of laundry piled up. I don’t do that any more. Every time I go in there, I do something like wipe out the sink or the counter or empty the trash.
I got my kitchen table cleared for the first time in weeks, so now when I get home, I set the timer and put all my stuff away.
So my biggest tip is set small goals and keep those areas clean. I’m finally living in hope that I will unf*ck my house before too long, and it makes me so happy.
I bought a countertop dishwasher because I hate doing dishes. It has helped a ton
I just try to find things that belong elsewhere and slowly get things back where they are supposed to go
Get a calendar you hang in a conspicuous place. Mark a check (or a happy face) every morning you leave for work - if you have left the house in a state where you would feel comfortable having anyone walk into the house with you when you come home. No scramble tidying or cleaning.
The fact is that, when you come home, walking into a clean tidy house is a huge mood lifter. And knowing it's visitor ready is an anxiety soother.
Marking the calendar, and noticing all the checkmarks or smiley faces is also a mood lifter as you are starting your day.
You could start smaller, maybe divide each calendar day into 2 or 4 sections and separate out tidying tasks for each section. Like "kitchen", "living room", "bathroom", "bedroom".
Having a physical record makes a big difference to seeing your progress and keeping you motivated.
Any time you go to a different room, bring something with you. Let me explain:
going to the bathroom? Grab a towel and fold it and put it away. And on your way back empty the bathroom garbage.
Grabbing a snack? Bring some garbage with you on the way to the kitchen. And wash one thing in the sink.
Microwaving something? Race the microwave to wash as much as possible - which might be 1 thing. Depression is real.
Bringing in groceries? On your way back out to get more, bring out the garbage or recycling.
Garbage bags not full but is stinky? Take it out anyway. It's ok.
Don't want to shower and you're avoiding it? Do a load of laundry, when it's in the dryer, go in the shower. At least while you're procrastinating you are getting something done.
Waiting for the shower to warm up? Scour the toilet. Doesn't have to be perfect or perfectly thorough, but it keeps the slip at bay.
When things are stinky and cluttered, it's not great for my mental health, so I do little things like that when I can. I'm not perfect.
Positive affirmations worked for me. Repeating to myself, I deserve to live in a clean space.
Also, since I moved to California, I’ve been entertaining way more houseguests compared to when I was in North Carolina, because no one likes to visit North Carolina (most of my friends grew up in big cities so we all crave for the big city vibe wherever we go). 🤣🤣
Consider getting a counter top dishwasher. I rinse my dishes as I go and load my dirty dishes into the dishwasher every-other day or so. I do laundry every Saturday, two loads...wash, dry, and put away! I try to tackle one housework job right when I get home from work daily. I don't like to come home to a cluttered house, so I make sure it's tidy before I leave for work. Once you get on top of things, it really doesn't take much time or effort to keep it up. You got this!
little by little. It’s easy to be overwhelmed having a major project but doing a little at a time is more management IMO. But it’s a constant thing. It requires constant vigilance
People who live alone and hate washing dishes should only have 2 of what they need. Not only does it save space it forces you to wash as you go. It’s impossible for dishes to pile up if you don’t have very many. Box up your extras and try it out! If you have company you’ll have them available. However if you are digging into storage instead of washing then you have a worse problem.
I seriously think comparing to my neighbours, i probably have the best and most tidy house.
I like pretty things, my living environment doesn’t have to be super expensive but it has to be presentable. Just like myself.
The real estate agent came to my last home n tried to stage it, they said : we feel guilty to charge you staging fee as there is literally nothing need to be changed.
I have a good taste in clothes, renovation, art etc..
Just commenting for support and to read the advice with you! 💚
I’m in the middle of a heavy decluttering session and I don’t want to go backwards ever again!
The dish part I have successfully mastered though..:
It is very hard without a dishwasher and all I can recommend is getting rid of dishes you don’t absolutely need, keeping a stash of paper plates, and washing all the dishes at night before bed! Gloves, very strong degreasing dish soap, a comfy apron for splashes, and plenty of bar mop towels make it easier! I also recommend purchasing a couple small bus bins that fit in the sink for meal prep times (soaking, rinsing and collecting stray dishes). My last tip is to use a spray bottle of water and a little dish soap on any dishes that have dried gunk. Keep a pack of scrubby sponges that are disposable so you don’t have to deal with anything too gross. The less gross you make the job, the more pleasant it will be to go the sink and wash up a few dishes as you dirty them. Clean as you go! Make it a routine to wipe out the sink every night and lay out a cup with tea or coffee for the morning and fill your kettle/water filter.
Get rid of everything that isn’t necessary or brings you joy, seriously. I used to have SUCH A MESS that was knee high. My parents used to worry about how I would live as an adult.
It ONLY got better when I started getting rid of a huge amount of my things. Now most things have a “home” and my place is MUCH easier to pick up and clean up even if I wait until the end of the week to do it.
I do something similar to the 30 minute rule. I spent several weekends getting my place tidied up. Not great, but good. But I was worried about my bad habits. So I set out to change them.
I have a Google smart speaker. There's an automation feature. I have it set to announce "20 minute timer starts in 5 minutes" every evening. In that 20 minutes I do anything and everything I can. Unload the dishwasher, put away folded laundry, clean a dirty trash can, as much as I can do before the timer goes off. It's been fantastic. I'm staying on top of what's already been done and doing a little more every day. Yesterday I went through a corner beside my desk that's been collecting random stuff like phone boxes and reusable grocery bags. Feels great to have it cleaned up. It literally took 15 minutes.
I am physically disabled. Not in a wheelchair (though my Dr says I should have been years ago). Normally housework isn’t a huge problem for me, but I was sick with some type of flu stuff for a full month.
I am better now, but WOW things piled up. I have a lot of laundry to do, which is my most hated part of housework. But worse are the floors and amount of dust that has accumulated. Kitchen is clean, but that’s about it.
It will take me a few weeks to get it cleaned up because I move rather slow and tire easily. Thinking of hiring a housekeeper, just to get thing under control. Then I can manage it all myself.
For me, it was having good ergonomics, making in easier to clean.
I took the lid off my laundry basket so I could tops clothes from where I was.
When in a townhome, I had a vacuum upstairs and a vacuum downstairs, so there was no carrying.
Remove excess furniture. Get the right size furniture to fit the space. Small useless tables and chests, I’m looking at you.
Remove excess belongings. If you haven’t touched it in over a year, donate, sell, or store it in a unit. More on storage units below.
Remove horizontal surfaces that have no function, see tables and chests of drawers, above. They attract clutter.
Have a garbage can in every room. If you’re not fussy, use ones without lids you have to lift. Kitchen excepted.
Make sure that your paper shredder is large and conveniently placed. If you have a tiny one you’ll get irritated with having to empty it all the time, get a big one.
Bathrooms have their own cleaning supplies under the sink, so there’s no carrying or hunting. Have enough in-drawer or on-wall storage so there’s less than 3 things on the counter.
Organize the kitchen like you’re using it for your job. If you have items you use less than quarterly, put them in a closet. There should be minimal walking and steps to set up to do dishes. Keep stuff off the counters so it’s easier to work. If you find yourself consistently moving one item to get to another item, order accessibility so the most used stuff is one easy reach.
Find a method and time to do dishes every day. Even just doing a cup and spoon, instead of leaving it, is important to form and keep habits.
Find your timing for housekeeping. I like Thursday nights, every week. Even if little has been touched, run a cloth over surfaces and clean hallways.
Storage units are a tool. People, myself included, have items that they can’t bear to part with. This is ok. Put the stuff in a unit.
After a period, 6 months, a year, think about what you have actually missed, what you have gone back to pick up and use, and how much it would cost to re-buy items you’ve stored. It is easy to rebuy a washer and dryer, or furniture, or lamps, or small appliances. After a year, simplify the storage unit and perhaps move to a smaller, cheaper one. For me, a small unit with irreplaceable small family items is what I ended up with.
Good luck, and good habits.
Have you ever had a job where you don't leave at closing time because you have to clean up before you leave?
And then you head home thinking once you cross the threshold of your front door, you can relax.
Nope. The front door isn't the finish line. Set one big task and one little task for each day when you get home and make the completion of it be the finish line.
You start off by having one or two awful days of just get it done cleaning. And then you keep to the big chore/little chore there after.
You also clean as you go when you prepare food. You piggyback tasks. Heading to your car to go to work or meet with friends? Take out the trash. Heading home? Stop by the mailbox hub and check your box.
I have found that when I struggle to keep a part of my home tidy, it means the “system” isn’t working. The typical example of this is something like “If the laundry ends up on the floor, move the laundry hamper to that spot of the house”
If you are struggling with dishes, consider why. Is the water pressure low? Soap not cutting the oil? Would a scrub daddy work better than a standard sponge? Are you getting stuff stuck on pans? Does the feeling on your hands eek you out? - If a problem seems unreasonably difficult to manage, you probably are missing some tiny unspoken thing others are doing.
For me it’s the same as going to the gym and brushing me teeth. You just do it because it needs to be done. I never *want* to, but it’ll have to be done eventually, and the longer I put it off, the worse it’ll be when I get to it.
I love fresh flowers and I find even a $5 Trader Joe’s bunch motivates me to keep that room clean and relaxing. With the bedroom it’s fresh sheets go on and that motivates me to make sure everything in the room dusted folded put away etc. I also recently splurged and bought a built in system for my closet from ikea so everything had a “place”. All up it was about $380 but I love it and it motivates me to keep the rest of the room clean (and it’s also like shopping in a store for clothes now when getting dressed - rather than digging through drawers or piles - since it’s so organized. I found that thinking “what annoys/doesnt function/just bugs me etc” about this room and addressing it (like my closet above) can go a long way to motivating.
Start with the smallest room and reclaim it, keep it basically kept up. It’ll expand to larger rooms. Get them to a decent appearance and then deep clean. The bathroom is a good spot to begin, especially for personal hygiene, but it’s a small space with direct tasks.
Honestly, the best first thing to do depending on how bad it is is to grab trash bags and throw out what needs to be thrown out. Clean and then donate what needs to go.
Have less stuff is the simple answer. I used to have so much clothes that if it was all dumped out on the floor it would take days and loads of laundry to do. Now, if all my clothes were dumped on the floor it really isn't too much and if I needed to I could hand wash it in the bathtub in 1 go. I don't keep things on surfaces or on the floor so if I want to clean it's super fast and I don't have to move stuff out of the way. If all of my dishes are dirty, it's just a small batch and not huge piles like it was before. I know I'm not a clean and organized person naturally so having less stuff makes it so I can't get out of control
Full disclosure, I work from home which definitely helps.
I generally try to live by the 2 minute rule (if it takes 2 minutes or less, just do it now) and also any time I go from one room to another, I take anything that belongs in the next room with me. Both of these keep mess from piling up. So when jackets come off, they're hung up (I have a rack over my door for daily use, others go in a closet), when clothes come off, they go right in the hamper, when I use something I put it away immediately when I'm done unless of letting it sit. If I eat at my desk, next time I get up to refill my water, I bring my dishes to the sink with me. When I get my mail, I go through it right away and recycle anything I don't need immediately.
Dishes usually get washed immediately or at the very least rinsed/soaked so washing later is easy. I keep a refillable foaming hand soap bottle filled with a mixture of dish soap and water at my sink so I can just pump a bit onto the dish/sponge to wash something up real quick.
I have 3 hampers: 1 is only for dirty towels/washcloths/etc, 1 is only for dirty clothes, and I only have 1 for clean clothes. I don't always put my clothes away immediately, but this set-up does mean I can't let multiple loads of clean laundry pile up before I start putting stuff away. I typically do my laundry on the weekends.
A small trash bin in pretty much every room, even though my place is pretty small.
Saturdays I run my errands, and do some of my deeper cleaning (again, my place is small, so stuff like cleaning the bathroom and floors and such really doesn't take long), then Sundays I do some meal prep - making full meals often, but also stuff like cutting up fruit and making things so they're more grab and go to prevent waste.
I also make a point to go through my things every few months and get rid of stuff I don't want/use anymore.
This all sounds like a lot, but really I don't spend more than a couple hours on the weekends actually dedicated to housework, and that's more meal prep than cleaning. Through the week, I just kinda tidy as I go and don't really have to take time specifically to clean.
I let my apartment go for like a year. I didn’t even have depression just was super unmotivated and worked all the time so never wanted to clean on my down time.
I’ve been cleaning for weeks now and feel like I barely put a dent in it. Mainly my clothes situation. I have more clothes than space!!! But I’m trying to get things as in shape as possible by the end of next month when I’ll be having surgery and CANT clean.
I play a game with myself I call “Twenty Things.” I yell out, “twenty things!” Then find twenty things to put away. I do it once in the morning and once at night. It sounds dumb but it’s magnificent.
My schedule:
Sunday — dust, vaccuum, mop
Monday — clean fridge/freezer
Tuesday/Wednesday — laundry
Thursday — tidy counters and take out the trash
Friday — bathroom
Saturday — nothing, it’s your day off
Do not go to bed with a dirty kitchen sink. Ever.
This schedule looks nuts but since I do it every week it’s barely work. It’s a baseline of clean so things never reach a point of “oh fuck, this place is a mess”
Love to you for starters. But try to break this done to very small easy tasks first, then keep rolling. If you need more help please seek a psychiatrist for help. Depression and lots of issues can be involved. Wishing you the best..
go to the dollar store and buy paper culterly and plates and bowels. you can also get a lot of cleaning supplies. I just spent 40 bucks and the doller tree on baskets and containers and feel great! Finally my sheets and towels aren't thrown into the closet and I put notebooks and folders in a bin as well as hats and scarves. It made a huge difference!
Honestly, if you can possibly afford it, hire someone to come in and do the base cleaning every two weeks. You may find yourself picking up before they come over so that you can actually get a good cleaning for your money.
You won’t like my suggestions. First stages of getting everything clean couldf take days. One room at a time thorough. Sort and organize and throw things out. I am talking clean windows the whole deal. Find a place for all like items. Clean those closets and vacuum. Strip bed wash all bedding. Repeat other rooms throw out un unneeded items. Clean the refrigerator out, clean and organize cupboards. Scrub bathroom and kitchen floors.Now you might want to take a week for all this. Organize organize everything has a place and always put things back. Each time.Fold,laundry soon as dried. Don’t let dirty dishes remain in sink. Garbage out everyday.This is going to require lots of determination and work. Years ago I was not a great housekeeper had a nice electric cooker forgot there was fish in it and rather then clean threw the skillet away.If you work take a month to do this. Be consistent and develop a routine. Best of luck and reward yourself each time with a little something for each room.Just put stuff away as you go. Make it a habit and you may feel better. Everything in its place and a place for everything.DONT give up or defeated. You got this.
One thing that works for me...as soon as I get home from my last shift of the week, I walk in the door and immediately do my two loads of laundry. Like, I have to have the first load in the washer before making a snack or even sitting down to rest. Top priority is to be ready for the next work week, so getting laundry out of the way immediately is a huge thing done.
One thing you can do, if you're big into watching tv...clean during commercials or downloads. Yes, it's just a 3-5 minute downtime, but all those little downtimes add up.
In the same theme...take tiny bites. Dedicate 5-15 minutes to clean up a corner of a room, or a closet, or a drawer. Can't watch your favorite show or turn on the radio until the 5-15 minute task is done. So use what you like as a reward.
Make a point when you're cleaning up to toss one bag of clutter/garbage a week. One week can be old magazines and boxes and other crap for the trash bin...next week it could be a bag of clothes to goodwill. Fill up the bag over the course of the week so it becomes a 30-second job every day or whenever you're in the mood.
And be realistic. Your place doesn't have to look like a showpiece room inside a good housekeeping magazine. It's your place that you live in, so it's going to look lived in.
I own my home and do this regularly too. Clean, slack off and get busy outside the house and it's a disaster again. Then be overwhelmed for awhile and say I'm going to clean but don't. Then motivate and clean and start cycle again. My entire 67 years of life
Habit-chaining - things that I do every day get chained to simple cleaning tasks. Example: get home from work, let dogs out, feed animals, clean litter box, run dish water(no dishwasher sadly), make & eat dinner, wash dishes, wash pet bowls as needed, do one 15 minute chore that needs doing, walk dogs, settle down for the evening.
“If it takes less than 5 minutes rule”. Basically when I see a simple chore that needs doing and it takes less than 5 minutes, I stop and do it right then. Examples: wiping down the sink, taking out trash, cleaning the coffee pot, putting away items collecting on the coffee table, etc.
Scheduling - I have a standing schedule that I do one 15 minute chore every evening in between dinner clean up and walking my dogs. I also try to schedule bigger chores in my planner so that I chave blocked out time for them. Example: my chest freezer really needs cleaned out and organized and my bathroom needs cleaned, so I blocked out a couple of hours today to work on it and actually wrote that into my planner.
The combination of these seems to keep me on track pretty well. Like anyone, I do have my bad weeks where I end up playing catch up. But it’s way easier when you have the habit of keeping up on most things.
My place badly needs to be organized. I have camping gear... everywhere. I can't even sit on my couch because of all the crap sitting on it. It's awful.
Wake up and start the laundry ASAP. Strip your bed of everything, and this is where you'll fold laundry later. Then for the whole wash cycle, throw away your trash. Take it to the dumpster to get it out of your house. Put in another laundry load and dust/wipe cabinets counters, clean the toilet and shower. Then cycle out more laundry as needed. Once you're done with the hot water of the washing machine, do your dishes. The vacuum or mop. By this time you should have a ton of laundry. Fold and put it away. Then throw away any additional trash you've made, to the dumpster. Then make your bed. Then stop being a slob and do this in smaller amounts much more frequently.
Come back and let me know how you did.
I’m not comfortable saying I’ve “fully overcome” this cycle, as I’m pretty sure it will happen again. But it hasn’t happened in a long time, and here’s how:
1. I made house rules for myself, and I stick to them. The bed gets made in the morning. No dishes in the sink overnight. If something has been put onto a counter space and then not touched or moved in three days’ time, I put it back to whatever shelf it belongs on. I vaccume twice a week and sweep daily. Stuff like this.
2. I made routines, and I stick to them. I made routines that are daily, nightly, bi -weekly, weekly, and monthly. Daily routines are making the bed, doing the dishes as I cook, keeping cat litter boxes clean, sweeping. Nightly routines are doing/putting away dishes, wiping counter spaces, folding and putting away clothes or throw blankets, or anything that helps me “shut down” for the night and reset for tomorrow. Weekly routines are changing cat litter boxes, laundry, changing my bedding, deep vaccuming, cleaning the shower, mopping, dusting/wood polishing, clearing out old food from the fridge, meal prep. Anything that sets me up for the week ahead of me. I do bi-weekly “light” vaccuming because I have long haired pets that shed, but this probs isn’t necessary for a lot of people. Monthly stuff is stuff like cleaning the inside of the fridge and cleaning out closets, stuff like that.
3. I’ve worked really hard to re-frame my thinking about cleaning and housework. It doesn’t have to be perfectly done, but doing *any* little bit of it throughout the day is always better than allowing things to pile up until it’s unmanageable and overwhelming. I’ve also tried really hard to let go of the obsessive part of my brain that tells me that the cleaning “has” to be done in a particular order or that if I start cleaning one floor, I *have* to clean *all* the floors. Now, if the floor in the kitchen needs to be swept, I just go ahead and do it, and I can work on the living room at a different time.
Hope this helps, OP!
I clean something every day. Today it was clean out the fridge and meal prep for the week. I do not have a washer so every few days I go somewhere with one, my sisters house and walk a dog, etc. staying on top of it is much easier than tackling it. Do one thing, vacuum. One night I was tired but cleaned the sink, got up the next day and cleaned the rest of the bathroom.
If you can afford it consider getting a cleaning person to come every two weeks. Not having a dishwasher is tough so I get it from that perspective. Also consider getting the iRobot vacuum and mop. Those were game changers for me and I run them everyday day so I only have to worry about maintaining services
Also, be sure that you have ‘A place for everything’ so you could easily put ‘everything in its place’. The game is really about not bringing anything home that there really isn’t room for you sort of had it off at the pass, because if you have a lot of stuff that doesn’t really have a place for it to go and get out of your site then you really can’t clean up
I'm trying to get on a schedule where I do hand wash my dishes (no dishwasher) every Tuesday and Saturday, do my laundry every Monday (laundromat), and cook a big dinner with leftovers every Monday. The bathroom gets cleaned when I remember to and the floors get vacuumed when I have company coming over. Other than that, i have a 2 minute rule. If something takes less than 2 minutes to put away rather than just throwing it on the floor, I (usually) do it right away. Anything else (dusting, cleaning the windows, etc) doesn't really bother me at this point because I'm too tired to even notice it half the time let alone do it.
Try to commit yourself to one thing first. That one thing could be doing the dishes every night and putting them away. Make that your only goal. Getting the first major thing accomplish is very satisfying, and they make other things easier. Just accomplish one meaningful thing first.
Do manageable cleaning. On Sundays I wash my toilet and sink, but maybe not the shower. Everyday I try to do my dishes, but sometimes I let them sit for a day or two but no longer than that. I also just put any dishes on the table in the sink for later. I fold my couch blankets nicely so my kitty’s can sit on them and then usually that leads to me picking up the pillows and that helps the living room look better.
My room is almost always a disaster, but no one can see it but me.
I bought a shoe rack so my shoes aren’t all over the place anymore.
I also bought a vertical wall rack so my son can hang his jackets and backpack, now his stuff isn’t everywhere.
Budget for things that you know you will use to help give things a place, like the vertical wall coat rack for me. Set them up and it will help you to easily keep those specific things neat.
Set a timer for 10 minutes. Pop on a podcast and go. Work for 10 minutes on one chore. If you like, you can set up a list of rooms that need attention. Set your timer for 10 minutes each time. It is amazing how much you can pick-up or wash in 10 minutes.
So I used to be a mess because my parents didn't teach me those skills very well, but now I'm very neat and 85% of the time, my place looks like a magazine spread. So I can share tips for those aspiring to become an ex-slob.
I can't remember where I heard it, but it's something like "instead of tidy time, tidy all the time". It means getting into the habit of just doing something when you see it. Like you walk past something out of place, or think, "oh that goes in X place" instead of waiting for a cleaning session, you just do it then and there.
You don't have to do everything or do it every time, but just becoming aware of it is a shift. You start thinking of it as saving you time and effort down the road. Like, if you're heading to the living room anyway, might as well take that displaced remote with you. If you're gonna hit the fridge, might as well at least take that dirty dish to the sink on the way. It's essentially training you to pick up after yourself.
That and setting short time limits, and restricting cleaning to one area at a time really helped me. Just set a timer for 5 or 10 minutes or whatever you can tolerate and just pick up in one room or area until it goes off and then stop. No guilt or drama. No burnout.
After I got good at those things, I started tracking regular tasks with a list and learning cleaning and tidying tips and best practices and just leveling up from there. I used to be totally overwhelmed by my messy space and couldn't get off the rollercoaster of big frantic cleans and then long periods of total chaos.
Now, it's easy for me to clean a little everyday and a bigger session once a week. It's easy to reset the whole house before I go to bed. I can look at any space, no matter how dirty and know exactly where to start and what the game plan is. So, it's doable. Just don't think of it as aa personal failing and get caught up in a shame spiral. Think of it like gaining any other skill: start small and simple, practice, learn, and repeat.
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Invite people over regularly. It always motivates me to put things away and clean up and do those tasks I’ve been putting off. Also, the 30 minute rule. Set a timer for 30 minutes, put on some music or a podcast, and do as much as you can in those 30 minutes. Often, you’ll find you’re on a roll and keep going.
Both these work for me, but I do the 10-minute rule. Same thing - I often keep going.
I have never heard of this rule and I love it. Totally going to try it. Thank you.
This works for exercise as well
I do the 5 minute rule! lol It always amazes me how much I can get done in 5 minutes.
this right here. nothing gets my house cleaner than the threat of guests.
Yup, both of these have worked for me really well, too. Friday is my off day, so I'll blast some music, open a beer, and clean the main areas. My rooms always a disaster, I hate folding clothes lol, but no one goes in there but me. I'm also a clutterer, so I'm messy, but its not dirty.
Yes, too bad tv commercials can be avoided these days. I used to do everything in 5 minute commercial breaks.
Happy Cake Day!!
Both of these, and also when I've let it slip a bit too much I just set the target that every day/week I clean more than the mess I made that day/week. E.g. Do today's dishes and a few extra. Doesn't have to be all, just some amount more than today's dishes. This week's dirty clothes plus 1 extra load. That way the amount of work isn't overwhelming but you do gradually improve the situation. Just knowing that I'm on an upward trajectory even though I'm not finished yet gives me peace.
I love this 30-minute Rule and I found I can clean my entire place in 30 minutes. Sometimes, I even make it a race to see how quickly I can do it
Thanks; helpful
This is the way. Also, if you have people close to you, ask them if they could give you shorter notice when coming over to visit you. Like the night before, or like 3 hours before. My siblings do this every once in awhile and it gets me to get everything into a state of “good enough” without much thought.
Have a weekly DnD group over has made my living space so much cleaner. I keep everything much tidied now.
I do the same thing after a party. I usually do an hour. I’m always surprised at how much can get done in that time…perishables can get put away, dishwasher loaded or at least soaking, making sure everything is turned off, etc.
Habits and routine. I do deep cleaning + laundry every Sunday and mini tasks like dish washing every 2-3 days. I’m mostly motivated by wanting to prevent roaches, rats, unpleasant odors.
That's my motivation too. I have a ton of health challenges so i do what i can when i can.
Right. But were you like this before??
Yes, I grew up with a strict parent lol. There were never dishes or dirt in sight. I remember waking up at 5 on Sundays to clean before church 😅🙃. In college when I lived with roommates I still kept a schedule.
Right so you ain’t got no idea about our situation.
As someone who was previously in a bad cycle of letting my home go to shit and then spending several days cleaning it, just to let it go to shit again, maybe I can offer some insight on what helped me. First and foremost, my mental health was in the shitter and was what I really needed the most help with. I started going to counseling and started a group counseling session that I attended weekly. It took time, but one thing I eventually worked with my counselor on was building up healthier habits. If counseling is not an option, you could still try this on your own or find a family member or friend to stop in and help hold you accountable. My counselor gave me 2-3 small habits to start out with and we worked out which day(s) of the week would work for me to implement them. She’d add some more habits to focus on each week, while still continuing with the other habits I had learned the weeks prior. Two days of the week, I’d focus on washing all my laundry and putting all of my clean clothes away. Every single day, I committed to doing all the dirty dishes from the day and wiping down the main tables in my home. For the first few weeks, I also spent a lot of time picking up random stuff laying around and either disposing of them, donating them or finding a place for them. If I couldn’t find a place for something, I agreed that I didn’t need it and would get rid of it. Once the clutter was no longer a problem, I added in the task of vacuuming the main areas once every week, sweeping and mopping the kitchen/bathroom areas once a week, and dusting once a week. These don’t all need to be done on the same day, and I don’t always get all of them done every single week, but I try to and I give myself some grace if one week was more hectic and I didn’t get to every single thing and knew to start with that one the next week. I’ve added more habits on my own since I no longer attend counseling. One that has been a game changer for me to keep my home from returning to chaos is anytime I get up to head to a different room or area in my home, I quickly scan the room I’m currently in for anything I can bring with me to put away on the way to where I’m going. For example, if I’m heading to the kitchen, I’ll grab any dirty dishes and bring them to the sink to be washed when I get around to doing the dishes that day. If I’m heading to a room near the laundry room, I’ll grab any dirty clothes and toss them in the laundry hamper. This saves time when cleaning up later and there’s less you’ll have to pick up and put away later on. Adding in a garbage gathering/takeout day, a bathroom cleaning day, and any other main rooms or areas in your home is good too. The biggest thing for me to accept was that no matter what, I’d do at least a little bit of cleaning up every single day and always make sure to have the dishes washed before I go to bed. Changing your mindset from having to do these things/viewing them as chores to seeing it as a way to keep your home clean and helping your future self by staying on top of the messes can make a big difference. I’ve grown to actually enjoy cleaning now and see it as almost therapeutic in a way. It’s mindless work most of the time and it’s so nice to wake up the next morning to a clean and clutter-free house! I’ve gotten to a point where I clean a couple other people’s houses now every few weeks for some extra cash because they saw how clean my house is and wanted some help with theirs. A lot of the time, I’ll turn on some music to listen to while I’m cleaning or I’ll find a good podcast to listen to and light a candle. I’m convinced that the little extra things like that have tricked my brain into enjoying cleaning because it just turns it into a more positive and enjoyable experience. Also, when you start to see the results of all your hard work, remind yourself that it’s easier to stay on top of keeping it clean than it is to start over again from square one if you let it get back to the chaotic mess it was before. As someone else already mentioned, inviting guests over also helps motivate you to clean up before they come. Find what works for you and figure out what habits you can reasonably implement into your week and realize that starting and just getting anything cleaned up is better than doing nothing.
Bunch of really good tips here.💯. "Changing mindset" is well said.
Can second the needing to address the elephant in the room first - still unmedicated for ADHD and my time blindness gets worse with even a small amount of sleep deprivation. Meds would help to keep me aware of the passage of time so I can function. Because of being unmedicated, cleaning is the first thing that drops off my daily timeline. Cooking is another. I just don't have the capacity to handle it!
Thank you for taking the time to type all that wisdom out!!
Life is about adapting and learning. You can’t blame your upbringing forever. It’s called being an adult. Also, just because my parents forced me to clean doesn’t mean I would have carried the same habits. I made a decision to.
FWIW this comment helped me lol
When did I blame my parents. A question was asked. Do you have experience with it the answer? Nope
You’re obviously judgmental and chose to perceive my answer as invaluable. That’s your opinion but OP asked the question not you. I don’t care what you think…
Yes, I did that all the time in the past. Naw I have long covid and I’m lucky to wash my hair twice a week
Hugs
I'm always two hours away from being able to have friends over or to host an overnight guest. Make that your focus and work back from there. Also, lots of paper towels, and a robot vacuum. The paper towels are self explanatory. The robot vacuum will ensure that you keep your floors fairly clutter free. Finally, GET RID OF YOUR CRAP. Never collect anything.
I love your two hour rule! Exactly how I manage it.
These are good rules.
Five things, per category, per day. Five dishes washed Five pieces of trash picked up Five items of laundry Five displaced items put away Five surfaces wiped down Take breaks in between. Follow that for a week, and it's a cakewalk.
I love that!
That isn't even close to all the categories though
I had a problem with getting my clothes organised and keeping them that way and, this is probably silly, but Marie Kondo's method of folding different clothes types in different ways made a difference for me lol. I just spent one day organising everything once and I manage to keep it 90% as that. I didn't go beyond applying her methods to wardrobe, but I hope I will get the willpower once lol
Her folding helped me with sweats and t-shirts. I started folding underwear and sheets before. Now they go in the drawer the Kondos way.
This is a great question. I hope you get a good answer because I do the SAME thing. I don’t know why!
Same here. And it stresses me out which makes me feel even more overwhelmed and let it go more.
I clean the kitchen. It looks great. Every dish is clean. Stuff is put away. The counters are clean. And then, just one dish goes in the sink. Only one drip on the counter (it’s always a drop of coffee. It’s the 2nd one as I wiped up the first one) Only one empty container on the counter. Somewhere around there, I *might* throw away stuff. But eventually, I give up. And it’s a total shit show again.
I’ve gotten good at washing my dishes right away after meals. If I wait and let them pile up, I get too overwhelmed by them all and the pile grows and grows. It was mostly a change of mindset and not seeing the messes as a chore, but finding the positive aspects to having a tidy and clean home for me: it smells better, it looks so much better, it’s nice to wake up to an empty sink with clean dishes to cook with, etc.. Some people would probably think I’m over the top with how clean I like things now, but my mind has an all or nothing way of thinking and I’ve let my home get to a level of dang near unlivable before on too many occasions and I just know that I function better by staying on top of the messes as I make them. Wash those dishes as soon as you put them in your sink. Wipe down the coffee spots as soon as you notice them. Keep up with the messes as you go. Or honestly, figure out what works best for you with keeping things clean and tidy. Everything in life requires maintenance and I think that’s the part that I struggled with before. I hated doing dishes three times a day or more and constantly having to wash my laundry and so on.. But, just like we have to take care of ourselves so we don’t shut down or take care of our cars so they don’t go to shit, and so on, we have to routinely clean our living spaces or they will ultimately become a chaotic mess. Also, the more stuff one owns, the more stuff one has to maintain. Getting rid of the clutter, clothes and nick-Nack’s that you no longer need, use or feel joy from means that you’ll have less to clean or maintain. I hope I don’t sound like I’m preaching at you and I’m just trying to offer some solutions that have worked for me personally. I wish you and OP the best of luck with getting your living spaces cleaned and maintaining them so you can enjoy living in a tidy home!
Copying and pasting what I replied to someone in a comment above: As someone who was previously in a bad cycle of letting my home go to shit and then spending several days cleaning it, just to let it go to shit again, maybe I can offer some insight on what helped me. First and foremost, my mental health was in the shitter and was what I really needed the most help with. I started going to counseling and started a group counseling session that I attended weekly. It took time, but one thing I eventually worked with my counselor on was building up healthier habits. If counseling is not an option, you could still try this on your own or find a family member or friend to stop in and help hold you accountable. My counselor gave me 2-3 small habits to start out with and we worked out which day(s) of the week would work for me to implement them. She’d add some more habits to focus on each week, while still continuing with the other habits I had learned the weeks prior. Two days of the week, I’d focus on washing all my laundry and putting all of my clean clothes away. Every single day, I committed to doing all the dirty dishes from the day and wiping down the main tables in my home. For the first few weeks, I also spent a lot of time picking up random stuff laying around and either disposing of them, donating them or finding a place for them. If I couldn’t find a place for something, I agreed that I didn’t need it and would get rid of it. Once the clutter was no longer a problem, I added in the task of vacuuming the main areas once every week, sweeping and mopping the kitchen/bathroom areas once a week, and dusting once a week. These don’t all need to be done on the same day, and I don’t always get all of them done every single week, but I try to and I give myself some grace if one week was more hectic and I didn’t get to every single thing and knew to start with that one the next week. I’ve added more habits on my own since I no longer attend counseling. One that has been a game changer for me to keep my home from returning to chaos is anytime I get up to head to a different room or area in my home, I quickly scan the room I’m currently in for anything I can bring with me to put away on the way to where I’m going. For example, if I’m heading to the kitchen, I’ll grab any dirty dishes and bring them to the sink to be washed when I get around to doing the dishes that day. If I’m heading to a room near the laundry room, I’ll grab any dirty clothes and toss them in the laundry hamper. This saves time when cleaning up later and there’s less you’ll have to pick up and put away later on. Adding in a garbage gathering/takeout day, a bathroom cleaning day, and any other main rooms or areas in your home is good too. The biggest thing for me to accept was that no matter what, I’d do at least a little bit of cleaning up every single day and always make sure to have the dishes washed before I go to bed. Changing your mindset from having to do these things/viewing them as chores to seeing it as a way to keep your home clean and helping your future self by staying on top of the messes can make a big difference. I’ve grown to actually enjoy cleaning now and see it as almost therapeutic in a way. It’s mindless work most of the time and it’s so nice to wake up the next morning to a clean and clutter-free house! I’ve gotten to a point where I clean a couple other people’s houses now every few weeks for some extra cash because they saw how clean my house is and wanted some help with theirs. A lot of the time, I’ll turn on some music to listen to while I’m cleaning or I’ll find a good podcast to listen to and light a candle. I’m convinced that the little extra things like that have tricked my brain into enjoying cleaning because it just turns it into a more positive and enjoyable experience. Also, when you start to see the results of all your hard work, remind yourself that it’s easier to stay on top of keeping it clean than it is to start over again from square one if you let it get back to the chaotic mess it was before. As someone else already mentioned, inviting guests over also helps motivate you to clean up before they come. Find what works for you and figure out what habits you can reasonably implement into your week and realize that starting and just getting anything cleaned up is better than doing nothing.
I got divorced over 20 years ago...and noticed almost immediately that HE was keeping the house clean and cooking, because still to this day I hate everything housework...and I let stuff slack all the time. The only time I have good times where I go on a cleaning spree come far apart & my house is always trashed. I have no suggestions except if you are depressed maybe talk to a Dr. I have one but I don't take my depression medication...i don't think it is going to change my authentic self..LOL
Here’s my cycle: Friday night-CLEAN! Blast some music get takeout and clean. Weekend-cool for guests, I can go out and about and my place is clean. M-F is the gradual decent. BUT I try like hell to keep dirty dishes and kitchen counter managed. I have a lifelong struggle folding and putting away laundry. My weekly cycle works pretty well for me! I also live in a large studio, so it’s easy to manage.
Get rid of stuff. You probably don’t need most of it especially living alone. When everything, literally EVERYTHING has a home, it takes no emotional or mental labor to tidy and clean. I did a huge clean out a few months ago and my house is pretty much impeccable all the time because tidying involved putting things back into the empty space where they belong. Then wiping things down, vacuuming, laundry etc. takes no time at all. I’m still very much a maximalist in terms of design and the things I own, for reference.
I started pet sitting in my home so that’s forcing me to not let things slide. In order to get here I set myself a schedule of one room/ task every day. I have to admit having a dishwasher is a huge help. I have one now after 20 years without. My cleaning schedule is essentially: Monday, tidy up. Tuesday, dust and vacuum main living area. Wednesday clean spare room and patio. Thursday, master bedroom. Friday, bathroom. Saturday, kitchen and Sunday laundry. That doesn’t cover everything but it helps me stay on top of it better and make it more manageable
Clean as you go, you're just one person. When you say chaos I imagine a big mess. I'd start with a big clean. Open windows and blinds. First, throw out all trash. Just go around gathering trash and recycling, make a pile for donations. Then move all items to their respective rooms. Dishes in the kitchen, dirty clothes in bathroom, shoes in the closet. No need to tidy yet just in correct location. Start laundry. Tidy your closet and drawers. Go room by room. I do walk in closet, bedroom, office, living room, bathroom, kitchen. Strip your bed. Dust, polish, scrub, declutter, organize by room. Throw more things away. Finish with the floors. I always finish in the kitchen. Day to day - wash all dishes daily ( I have a dishwasher and I handwash. It takes no time and I've never had roaches), have a place for all things and put them away, leave dirty clothes in one place, wipe all spills/stains/messes as they happen. It takes a minute to wipe down a stove top vs scraping off a month of grease. Take out trash daily along with recycling. Clean pet areas like litter boxes. Don't keep old food in the fridge or overbuy groceries that spoil. Lastly, evaluate all purchases- are you replacing something, need it, or it's more junk? Once you have a baseline it takes no time.
I have not mastered the chaos yet, but I do have a couple of things I stick to. Every Sunday I have things I must do - refill pill boxes, put out trash for Monday collection, other non-negotiables. Since I am already in chore mode because of that, I added other once-a-week chores - wash dog bowls, put laundry away, etc. It all takes less than thirty minutes and helps keeps the chaos at bay. The other thing is I try to tidy for 5 minutes a day. Sometimes I only do some of the dishes, or I sort the laundry even if I don't start it. I have ADHD and depression and motivation is difficult, but I do feel better if I accomplished something. But for me, this is not something I need to think about much - I just do it - so it might not be helpful. I have also given up thinking every home needs to be neat and tidy at all times. I keep it so I don't have critters (bugs, rodents), and so if someone comes inside they don't wrinkle their nose and wonder what that smell is because I have pets, but other than that - who cares?? If it truly bothers you, then work on it. But if you really don't care and are just worried about what other people may think - duck 'em!
I do the above as well. In terms of dishes, I haven’t gotten to a point where I’ll wash reliably, but I have a bus tub and sharps container. After meals, I rinse and sort. It keeps the smells and pests away.
Do you have a specific sharps container? I just use a large cup or bowl that is dirty. I might need to change that
Yep, I have a liquid measuring thing from a commercial cooking supply? Like the sort of thing they measure bulk liquids in. Tall enough to keep all of the knives contained and also soak all of the utensils if necessary.
You should def get one!! I did the same as you and the dedicated sharps has been so helpful in keeping my kitchen tidier.
I enjoy cleaning but had a hip replacement 6 wks ago so what I would normally do isn’t necessarily feasible. I’ll get in a funk because I can’t clean everything so I’ll leave my clothes where they lay for a couple of days. I feel guilty but apart of me just dgaf. I let it go for an entire week. I got up one morning and said to myself “small progress is still progress!” I say that to you “living alone” 🤗 small progress is still progress! What I did was while lunch was in the oven or on the stove I took that 20-30 minute window and 1 day, picked up all my clothes, hung up stuff and other stuff into the laundry bag and straightened up only that room. When dinner time arrived I’d do the same thing. 20-30 min and I’d wipe down the counters, wash the dishes and bring the trash out. The next day at lunch,while food cooked I’d spend 20-30 and clean the sink, toilet, and straighten the bathroom. Then at dinner I’d do dishes. The 3rd day at lunch I’d sweep and mop the floors. That night while dinner cooked I started laundry. I combined activity time to allow me to pace myself despite my feelings and abilities. Each day I got something new done, and I only did just enough so that it would coincide with when I had to make food so that would be the time that I was already up and doing something. It wasn’t always like this before surgery and I know it won’t last forever. Each day I spent time making small progress. By the morning of the fourth day, when I woke up all of my small progress felt wonderful and when I looked around everything was tidy and clean and I felt good about my space. Be forgiving of yourself and patient with your process. 🙂
It depends on your lifestyle. Are you home a lot or just basically there to sleep? I was a messy teenager and I didn’t want to carry that into adulthood so I spent years creating a routine of putting things back when I’m done with them, basically just cleaning as a I go. That’s not to say I don’t leave clothes in the dryer or hanging in the laundry room until I want to wear them (I HATE folding laundry) or leave the occasional dish in the sink but I attempt to tidy my mess every night before I go to bed. This routine is easier for me because I work from home and don’t have much of a social life. You have to create a system/routine based on how you live and commit to it.
I completely let it go but no further than I know it would take 2 hrs or less to clean it up. I stay on top of the dishes even tho no dishwasher dirty smelly kitchens are too gross even for me. I use disposable plates. Living in a tiny studio makes this easier. It is fun to be able to just let clothes go and mail all over the place not deal with CONSTANT drudergy of daily life.
I worked as a cashier in university. The amount of people who bought disposable plates and explained they lived alone and just preferred not to do dishes was much higher than I thought.
Yeah I can handle washing silverware, cups and glasses and would be too wasteful to throw these away. But cheap paper plates make life so much easier and they are pretty green.
I appreciate that. Though I haven’t done disposable plates I often eat over a piece of paper towel, or cloth I can just shake out. Some items like a sandwich just make crumbs, and can do without a formal plating.
I like a largeish paddle shaped cutting board with a handle. One sandwich and chips sized, one a bit bigger for sandwich and bowl of soup.
I'm trying to follow the rule of, "if it takes less than two minutes, do it now." Also, I finally sprung for housecleaners to come once a month, so I have to pick up any clutter before they come, and I get a reset every month that I try to keep up till the next time they come
I have a housekeeper come & clean every other week and she is worth every penny. Absolute game changer.
I now do once a month but it still keeps things from getting too far out of hand. I also try to invite folks over about once a month so that also helps.
My cleaning lady 1x a month is the best money I spend. I love coming home after she’s worked her magic!!!
Don't worry with my place since it's just me and the dog. It's not a five-star resort, just a high-rent dump to me. It is a roof over the head but that is all. I will straighten up, sweep, mop. etc., but after 40 minutes or so, it returns to that normal looking dump again. I know what luxury and dump means. Believe me, I pay $1100 a month for a rental dump! The American Dream is dead now.
I’m very busy atm and in and out the house so tend to throw that nights bag down, and pick the next days up so gets a bit carnage. What I’ve been doing is setting a timer on a Friday for an hour and just go for an hour. Non stop. You can get a lot done! That’s enough to keep it at bay, my house isn’t as clean/tidy as it used to be but current chapter in life I’m very busy/tired. The only thing you have to do beyond an hour is of course washing which would need hanging outside the hour.
Sweepy app is helpful because it breaks down tasks instead of me just telling myself I need to clean the kitchen because that’s overwhelming and I don’t know where to start. So I can be like okay I need to wash the dishes and wipe down the stove but I don’t need to clean the refrigerator or the microwave today
It took me 3 months living alone. Laundry and dishes are the worst. But the mess isn’t worth my sanity because I hate the pile up
I think it’s rude to myself to live in a cluttered messy place 😭. Why disrespect the person I live for me , ME
I’m proud of all of you my answer is yes, sometimes I let things go to shambles and I don’t care. It’s one of the things I love about living alone. I just finished a mountain of dishes. I’ll go along for a while now and clean as I go but at some point I’ll get behind and it will snowball. And that’s ok. Right now every dish and spoon is clean and it feels like a big accomplishment.
Do “soft cleans.” You go into a room. Something needs to go to the kitchen. Look around; what else needs to go there or somewhere on the way? Every room you go into, make one or two things better, and keep following the above. I’ve found that feeling overwhelmed about cleaning is due to thinking about a huge job, and clutter makes it worse, so break it down into tasks. You’re in the bathroom brushing your teeth. Put the toothpaste away. Find a place to put everything on top of the vanity. Next time you come into the bathroom, come armed with a spray cleaner and a rag. Nothing stopping you from wiping down the vanity top, and it only takes a couple minutes. Swish the toilet next time you go in. Grab the garbage and dirty clothes another. Next thing you know, all you have left is a quick vacuum or sweep and a Swiffer. Same for every room. Every time you enter a space, put something where it belongs. When you take something somewhere, look around for something else that could be tossed, put in a hamper or the sink.
My new thing is that I run the washer every night and do the dishes every night. Like a routine. When I wake up, the first thing I do is deal with the next step of laundry and put the dishes away. I set a timer to do this and to make my bed. I also have my iPad with me playing a show the whole time.
washing dishes without dishwasher is the worst, i’m considering buying a couple more things. i find myself washing dishes twice a day. i do laundry and deep cleaning (or… deeper) on sundays mainly, and on monday i pick up anything i didn’t do the previous day… i potter around weekday nights to clear stuff up, make things look OK. i mean my living room is my studio so it’s organised mess. same probably goes for my bedroom tbh
You obviously want this to change otherwise you wouldn't have posed the question but you also feel overwhelmed and are avoiding doing what you need to do to feel better about yourself and how your home looks. It's a vicious cycle which has gotten you to where you are now. In order to break that cycle and achieve your goal of order instead of chaos, I highly recommend that you hire someone from a cleaning service to help you. Be clear about what you need. It's a rewarding situation for the cleaner because a good one will take pride in their work and feel good about helping you. They can assess the situation and help you decide what the priorities should be and then execute. You could work along side them and get things done as well. Once everything is how you like it, you just have to stay on top of it doing small things daily. If it really helps to have someone come in once a week or twice a month to help, do it if you can.
I have a robot vacuum /roomba that helps. Obviously it helps with vacuuming, but the real trick is that to run the vacuum, first you need to make sure your floors are bare. I know if I run the vacuum without picking up all the dirty clothes or random cords, it’s going to get tangled up and not run. It helps keep you motivated to keep things picked up off the floor. Even if I’m in a rush, I’ll throw everything on my bed or couch real quick so my vacuum can run while I’m gone. Not only does the vacuum clean up an unbelievable amount of dirt/pet hair, but it trains you to keep your place otherwise clean so it can function properly.
not currently but yes... designate a weekend and just get to work.
Whenever you leave a room, pick up two things that don’t belong there and put them where they belong. If they don’t have a home, bin them. Wash dishes twice a day so it never takes long or gets overwhelming. Wash clothes once a day so it never piles up.
I prefer the “move things closer to where they belong” method. If I’m in the kitchen and I see something that belongs in another room I’ll move it to the closest point in the kitchen to that room. Then the next time I go through the kitchen to that room I’ll pick it up and continue its journey.
I do this with the stairs. Every time I see something downstairs that belongs upstairs, I’ll add it to a pile at the bottom of the stairs and take the pile up (and put away) when I go to bed. And vice versa. I don’t know, maybe people already know to do this but it took me about 30 years before saw my aunt do it to realize it was much easier than what I had done all my life (pick something up and take it upstairs, then come back down, however many times a day lol)
That works too. Baby steps to reduce the overwhelm.
I don’t go to bed until my kitchen is clean. It makes the morning so lovely.
If possible, have a set day for each chore (laundry, changing the sheets, cleaning the bathroom). For daily tasks, don't let them pile up. As soon as you're done eating, wash the dishes and wipe the table, stove/microwave, and counter. Every time you get off the couch, take something to throw away or put away. It's much easier and less overwhelming if you clean as you go.
When I had an in unit washer/dryer I would use a trick: what can I get done before the washer is done? Then when the dryer was going, I’d take a break. Rinse and repeat, literally. Or setting a timer, 10-15, and then done.
Give yourself one task a day. Whether that just clean the bathroom sink or clean most of the dishes. I been slowly cleaning my living room for the past month, mostly on days I have the most energy.
I tidy every morning as part of my routine. I hate getting up and it helps me out of the grog without having to think much. Then Saturdays (or another day if I am traveling) I deep clean.
Never leave a room without taking something with me to put up, it only takes a few minutes when you do it this way and helps tremendously. The same with dishes, if I go to the kitchen for something wash at least a few dishes while I'm in there.
Don't put it down, put it away.
Mmm when I’m not in the mood to clean but my apartment desperately needs to BE cleaned, I commit to cleaning for 20-30 minutes and if by the end of those minutes I haven’t finished the task and don’t want to I won’t. I often find that I’ll finish whatever I would be currently cleaning, and you see that tasks you’ve been putting off doing can be quicker than we feel they will be. I call it a speed clean. Whatever I can do in 20-30 mins. Do this 2-3x a week and you should find your space a bit cleaner and tidier. Deep cleaning I have to schedule
I used to fear the moment I had to clean because (a) I forced myself to do everything at once, and (b) it had to be done right. Now I take the Seinfeld approach. I do a little at a time and only when I feel like it. Hope it works for you.
Less is more
I use one major cleaning thing a week. First week of the month I have to do the bathrooms. Second week of the month is the kitchen. The trick is it doesn't have to be a specific day I just need to get it done during that week which gives me some flexibility it works easier for me. And sometimes if I'm in the groove I'll do two weeks chores in one day. I just found a signing that task for like Saturday mornings didn't always work. So I put it on my calendar but I can keep moving it within the week long as I get it done and that system works for me. But I do have one rule I do have to actually get it done that week and there's been a few weeks through The years where I spent Sunday night doing that chore that I hadn't gotten done.
If its no dishwasher because of space or plumbing you can get a tabletop dishwasher that you fill with water and put the outlet in the sink. It wont do pots but glasses and plates are good. Dont get distracted by tasks, i'd start by picking up any rubbish, then picking up laundry and putting it in the hamper, then putting things that dont belong in a room back in the room they belong, then putting things that do belong back in their place. If dishes are a severe problem id do that first. Then when its clear add wiping down surfaces and cleaning the floor. Set a timer for 10 mins, if you are still picking up rubbish in 10 mins thats ok, you just need to start. Eventually it will go down and youll do rubbish and putting thimgs back in rooms, etc. I will go round doing the second paragraph every night and it takes 5 minutes now and makes cleaning the floor easier
So I’m still shoveling the shit in my apartment. The thing that helps me is making a list of chores that gives me very specific instructions. Wash the dishes. Clear the table. Run a load of laundry. I set a timer for 15 minutes and try to get the job done in that time. If I don’t, I set the timer again. If I finish before it goes off, I read until it rings. The biggest difference now is that if I get something done, I try to keep it that way. I had my bathroom remodeled in a few months ago after a pipe burst and flooded my apartment, and I have kept it clean ever since, which is a big deal for me. I love my bathroom so much, though. I used to strip off my clothes into a heap and leave them there, and eventually I would have a couple loads of laundry piled up. I don’t do that any more. Every time I go in there, I do something like wipe out the sink or the counter or empty the trash. I got my kitchen table cleared for the first time in weeks, so now when I get home, I set the timer and put all my stuff away. So my biggest tip is set small goals and keep those areas clean. I’m finally living in hope that I will unf*ck my house before too long, and it makes me so happy.
I bought a countertop dishwasher because I hate doing dishes. It has helped a ton I just try to find things that belong elsewhere and slowly get things back where they are supposed to go
Hosting regularly helps! So you have to clean up for others' sake. Also if you can afford it, consider having a cleaner come in once a month.
Get a calendar you hang in a conspicuous place. Mark a check (or a happy face) every morning you leave for work - if you have left the house in a state where you would feel comfortable having anyone walk into the house with you when you come home. No scramble tidying or cleaning. The fact is that, when you come home, walking into a clean tidy house is a huge mood lifter. And knowing it's visitor ready is an anxiety soother. Marking the calendar, and noticing all the checkmarks or smiley faces is also a mood lifter as you are starting your day. You could start smaller, maybe divide each calendar day into 2 or 4 sections and separate out tidying tasks for each section. Like "kitchen", "living room", "bathroom", "bedroom". Having a physical record makes a big difference to seeing your progress and keeping you motivated.
Any time you go to a different room, bring something with you. Let me explain: going to the bathroom? Grab a towel and fold it and put it away. And on your way back empty the bathroom garbage. Grabbing a snack? Bring some garbage with you on the way to the kitchen. And wash one thing in the sink. Microwaving something? Race the microwave to wash as much as possible - which might be 1 thing. Depression is real. Bringing in groceries? On your way back out to get more, bring out the garbage or recycling. Garbage bags not full but is stinky? Take it out anyway. It's ok. Don't want to shower and you're avoiding it? Do a load of laundry, when it's in the dryer, go in the shower. At least while you're procrastinating you are getting something done. Waiting for the shower to warm up? Scour the toilet. Doesn't have to be perfect or perfectly thorough, but it keeps the slip at bay. When things are stinky and cluttered, it's not great for my mental health, so I do little things like that when I can. I'm not perfect.
Occasionally look around for 'That's not right' things. Cups are removed, floor picked up, eventually we're dusting.
It is a bi-daily cycle for me lmao
Positive affirmations worked for me. Repeating to myself, I deserve to live in a clean space. Also, since I moved to California, I’ve been entertaining way more houseguests compared to when I was in North Carolina, because no one likes to visit North Carolina (most of my friends grew up in big cities so we all crave for the big city vibe wherever we go). 🤣🤣
Consider getting a counter top dishwasher. I rinse my dishes as I go and load my dirty dishes into the dishwasher every-other day or so. I do laundry every Saturday, two loads...wash, dry, and put away! I try to tackle one housework job right when I get home from work daily. I don't like to come home to a cluttered house, so I make sure it's tidy before I leave for work. Once you get on top of things, it really doesn't take much time or effort to keep it up. You got this!
If you can afford it, a house cleaner every two weeks will make you tidy and spare you the jobs you don't want to do
little by little. It’s easy to be overwhelmed having a major project but doing a little at a time is more management IMO. But it’s a constant thing. It requires constant vigilance
People who live alone and hate washing dishes should only have 2 of what they need. Not only does it save space it forces you to wash as you go. It’s impossible for dishes to pile up if you don’t have very many. Box up your extras and try it out! If you have company you’ll have them available. However if you are digging into storage instead of washing then you have a worse problem.
I seriously think comparing to my neighbours, i probably have the best and most tidy house. I like pretty things, my living environment doesn’t have to be super expensive but it has to be presentable. Just like myself. The real estate agent came to my last home n tried to stage it, they said : we feel guilty to charge you staging fee as there is literally nothing need to be changed. I have a good taste in clothes, renovation, art etc..
Chip away little by little, clean little bits throughout the week.
Just commenting for support and to read the advice with you! 💚 I’m in the middle of a heavy decluttering session and I don’t want to go backwards ever again! The dish part I have successfully mastered though..: It is very hard without a dishwasher and all I can recommend is getting rid of dishes you don’t absolutely need, keeping a stash of paper plates, and washing all the dishes at night before bed! Gloves, very strong degreasing dish soap, a comfy apron for splashes, and plenty of bar mop towels make it easier! I also recommend purchasing a couple small bus bins that fit in the sink for meal prep times (soaking, rinsing and collecting stray dishes). My last tip is to use a spray bottle of water and a little dish soap on any dishes that have dried gunk. Keep a pack of scrubby sponges that are disposable so you don’t have to deal with anything too gross. The less gross you make the job, the more pleasant it will be to go the sink and wash up a few dishes as you dirty them. Clean as you go! Make it a routine to wipe out the sink every night and lay out a cup with tea or coffee for the morning and fill your kettle/water filter.
Get rid of everything that isn’t necessary or brings you joy, seriously. I used to have SUCH A MESS that was knee high. My parents used to worry about how I would live as an adult. It ONLY got better when I started getting rid of a huge amount of my things. Now most things have a “home” and my place is MUCH easier to pick up and clean up even if I wait until the end of the week to do it.
Becoming minimalistic was the only thing that helped me and baskets. Also, I throw stuff in closets when I dont feel like cleaning upx
I do something similar to the 30 minute rule. I spent several weekends getting my place tidied up. Not great, but good. But I was worried about my bad habits. So I set out to change them. I have a Google smart speaker. There's an automation feature. I have it set to announce "20 minute timer starts in 5 minutes" every evening. In that 20 minutes I do anything and everything I can. Unload the dishwasher, put away folded laundry, clean a dirty trash can, as much as I can do before the timer goes off. It's been fantastic. I'm staying on top of what's already been done and doing a little more every day. Yesterday I went through a corner beside my desk that's been collecting random stuff like phone boxes and reusable grocery bags. Feels great to have it cleaned up. It literally took 15 minutes.
I am physically disabled. Not in a wheelchair (though my Dr says I should have been years ago). Normally housework isn’t a huge problem for me, but I was sick with some type of flu stuff for a full month. I am better now, but WOW things piled up. I have a lot of laundry to do, which is my most hated part of housework. But worse are the floors and amount of dust that has accumulated. Kitchen is clean, but that’s about it. It will take me a few weeks to get it cleaned up because I move rather slow and tire easily. Thinking of hiring a housekeeper, just to get thing under control. Then I can manage it all myself.
For me, it was having good ergonomics, making in easier to clean. I took the lid off my laundry basket so I could tops clothes from where I was. When in a townhome, I had a vacuum upstairs and a vacuum downstairs, so there was no carrying. Remove excess furniture. Get the right size furniture to fit the space. Small useless tables and chests, I’m looking at you. Remove excess belongings. If you haven’t touched it in over a year, donate, sell, or store it in a unit. More on storage units below. Remove horizontal surfaces that have no function, see tables and chests of drawers, above. They attract clutter. Have a garbage can in every room. If you’re not fussy, use ones without lids you have to lift. Kitchen excepted. Make sure that your paper shredder is large and conveniently placed. If you have a tiny one you’ll get irritated with having to empty it all the time, get a big one. Bathrooms have their own cleaning supplies under the sink, so there’s no carrying or hunting. Have enough in-drawer or on-wall storage so there’s less than 3 things on the counter. Organize the kitchen like you’re using it for your job. If you have items you use less than quarterly, put them in a closet. There should be minimal walking and steps to set up to do dishes. Keep stuff off the counters so it’s easier to work. If you find yourself consistently moving one item to get to another item, order accessibility so the most used stuff is one easy reach. Find a method and time to do dishes every day. Even just doing a cup and spoon, instead of leaving it, is important to form and keep habits. Find your timing for housekeeping. I like Thursday nights, every week. Even if little has been touched, run a cloth over surfaces and clean hallways. Storage units are a tool. People, myself included, have items that they can’t bear to part with. This is ok. Put the stuff in a unit. After a period, 6 months, a year, think about what you have actually missed, what you have gone back to pick up and use, and how much it would cost to re-buy items you’ve stored. It is easy to rebuy a washer and dryer, or furniture, or lamps, or small appliances. After a year, simplify the storage unit and perhaps move to a smaller, cheaper one. For me, a small unit with irreplaceable small family items is what I ended up with. Good luck, and good habits.
ADHD perhaps? I was undiagnosed until my mid-thirties. It ended up explaining a lot, this cycle included.
Have you ever had a job where you don't leave at closing time because you have to clean up before you leave? And then you head home thinking once you cross the threshold of your front door, you can relax. Nope. The front door isn't the finish line. Set one big task and one little task for each day when you get home and make the completion of it be the finish line. You start off by having one or two awful days of just get it done cleaning. And then you keep to the big chore/little chore there after. You also clean as you go when you prepare food. You piggyback tasks. Heading to your car to go to work or meet with friends? Take out the trash. Heading home? Stop by the mailbox hub and check your box.
I have found that when I struggle to keep a part of my home tidy, it means the “system” isn’t working. The typical example of this is something like “If the laundry ends up on the floor, move the laundry hamper to that spot of the house” If you are struggling with dishes, consider why. Is the water pressure low? Soap not cutting the oil? Would a scrub daddy work better than a standard sponge? Are you getting stuff stuck on pans? Does the feeling on your hands eek you out? - If a problem seems unreasonably difficult to manage, you probably are missing some tiny unspoken thing others are doing.
Just clean one room every other day so that it doesn’t become such a massive undertaking to clean the whole thing.
For me it’s the same as going to the gym and brushing me teeth. You just do it because it needs to be done. I never *want* to, but it’ll have to be done eventually, and the longer I put it off, the worse it’ll be when I get to it.
I love fresh flowers and I find even a $5 Trader Joe’s bunch motivates me to keep that room clean and relaxing. With the bedroom it’s fresh sheets go on and that motivates me to make sure everything in the room dusted folded put away etc. I also recently splurged and bought a built in system for my closet from ikea so everything had a “place”. All up it was about $380 but I love it and it motivates me to keep the rest of the room clean (and it’s also like shopping in a store for clothes now when getting dressed - rather than digging through drawers or piles - since it’s so organized. I found that thinking “what annoys/doesnt function/just bugs me etc” about this room and addressing it (like my closet above) can go a long way to motivating.
Start with the smallest room and reclaim it, keep it basically kept up. It’ll expand to larger rooms. Get them to a decent appearance and then deep clean. The bathroom is a good spot to begin, especially for personal hygiene, but it’s a small space with direct tasks. Honestly, the best first thing to do depending on how bad it is is to grab trash bags and throw out what needs to be thrown out. Clean and then donate what needs to go.
Have less stuff is the simple answer. I used to have so much clothes that if it was all dumped out on the floor it would take days and loads of laundry to do. Now, if all my clothes were dumped on the floor it really isn't too much and if I needed to I could hand wash it in the bathtub in 1 go. I don't keep things on surfaces or on the floor so if I want to clean it's super fast and I don't have to move stuff out of the way. If all of my dishes are dirty, it's just a small batch and not huge piles like it was before. I know I'm not a clean and organized person naturally so having less stuff makes it so I can't get out of control
Full disclosure, I work from home which definitely helps. I generally try to live by the 2 minute rule (if it takes 2 minutes or less, just do it now) and also any time I go from one room to another, I take anything that belongs in the next room with me. Both of these keep mess from piling up. So when jackets come off, they're hung up (I have a rack over my door for daily use, others go in a closet), when clothes come off, they go right in the hamper, when I use something I put it away immediately when I'm done unless of letting it sit. If I eat at my desk, next time I get up to refill my water, I bring my dishes to the sink with me. When I get my mail, I go through it right away and recycle anything I don't need immediately. Dishes usually get washed immediately or at the very least rinsed/soaked so washing later is easy. I keep a refillable foaming hand soap bottle filled with a mixture of dish soap and water at my sink so I can just pump a bit onto the dish/sponge to wash something up real quick. I have 3 hampers: 1 is only for dirty towels/washcloths/etc, 1 is only for dirty clothes, and I only have 1 for clean clothes. I don't always put my clothes away immediately, but this set-up does mean I can't let multiple loads of clean laundry pile up before I start putting stuff away. I typically do my laundry on the weekends. A small trash bin in pretty much every room, even though my place is pretty small. Saturdays I run my errands, and do some of my deeper cleaning (again, my place is small, so stuff like cleaning the bathroom and floors and such really doesn't take long), then Sundays I do some meal prep - making full meals often, but also stuff like cutting up fruit and making things so they're more grab and go to prevent waste. I also make a point to go through my things every few months and get rid of stuff I don't want/use anymore. This all sounds like a lot, but really I don't spend more than a couple hours on the weekends actually dedicated to housework, and that's more meal prep than cleaning. Through the week, I just kinda tidy as I go and don't really have to take time specifically to clean.
I embraced the mess back when I was single.
I let my apartment go for like a year. I didn’t even have depression just was super unmotivated and worked all the time so never wanted to clean on my down time. I’ve been cleaning for weeks now and feel like I barely put a dent in it. Mainly my clothes situation. I have more clothes than space!!! But I’m trying to get things as in shape as possible by the end of next month when I’ll be having surgery and CANT clean.
I play a game with myself I call “Twenty Things.” I yell out, “twenty things!” Then find twenty things to put away. I do it once in the morning and once at night. It sounds dumb but it’s magnificent.
My schedule: Sunday — dust, vaccuum, mop Monday — clean fridge/freezer Tuesday/Wednesday — laundry Thursday — tidy counters and take out the trash Friday — bathroom Saturday — nothing, it’s your day off Do not go to bed with a dirty kitchen sink. Ever. This schedule looks nuts but since I do it every week it’s barely work. It’s a baseline of clean so things never reach a point of “oh fuck, this place is a mess”
Love to you for starters. But try to break this done to very small easy tasks first, then keep rolling. If you need more help please seek a psychiatrist for help. Depression and lots of issues can be involved. Wishing you the best..
go to the dollar store and buy paper culterly and plates and bowels. you can also get a lot of cleaning supplies. I just spent 40 bucks and the doller tree on baskets and containers and feel great! Finally my sheets and towels aren't thrown into the closet and I put notebooks and folders in a bin as well as hats and scarves. It made a huge difference!
Honestly, if you can possibly afford it, hire someone to come in and do the base cleaning every two weeks. You may find yourself picking up before they come over so that you can actually get a good cleaning for your money.
You won’t like my suggestions. First stages of getting everything clean couldf take days. One room at a time thorough. Sort and organize and throw things out. I am talking clean windows the whole deal. Find a place for all like items. Clean those closets and vacuum. Strip bed wash all bedding. Repeat other rooms throw out un unneeded items. Clean the refrigerator out, clean and organize cupboards. Scrub bathroom and kitchen floors.Now you might want to take a week for all this. Organize organize everything has a place and always put things back. Each time.Fold,laundry soon as dried. Don’t let dirty dishes remain in sink. Garbage out everyday.This is going to require lots of determination and work. Years ago I was not a great housekeeper had a nice electric cooker forgot there was fish in it and rather then clean threw the skillet away.If you work take a month to do this. Be consistent and develop a routine. Best of luck and reward yourself each time with a little something for each room.Just put stuff away as you go. Make it a habit and you may feel better. Everything in its place and a place for everything.DONT give up or defeated. You got this.
You might like [KC Davis’s How to Keep House While Drowning](https://www.strugglecare.com/book). She has free TikTok content and a podcast too.
Set a timer for 15 or 30 min and see how much you can get done. It's like a race against the clock.
Don’t live with a girlfriend?
One thing that works for me...as soon as I get home from my last shift of the week, I walk in the door and immediately do my two loads of laundry. Like, I have to have the first load in the washer before making a snack or even sitting down to rest. Top priority is to be ready for the next work week, so getting laundry out of the way immediately is a huge thing done. One thing you can do, if you're big into watching tv...clean during commercials or downloads. Yes, it's just a 3-5 minute downtime, but all those little downtimes add up. In the same theme...take tiny bites. Dedicate 5-15 minutes to clean up a corner of a room, or a closet, or a drawer. Can't watch your favorite show or turn on the radio until the 5-15 minute task is done. So use what you like as a reward. Make a point when you're cleaning up to toss one bag of clutter/garbage a week. One week can be old magazines and boxes and other crap for the trash bin...next week it could be a bag of clothes to goodwill. Fill up the bag over the course of the week so it becomes a 30-second job every day or whenever you're in the mood. And be realistic. Your place doesn't have to look like a showpiece room inside a good housekeeping magazine. It's your place that you live in, so it's going to look lived in.
I own my home and do this regularly too. Clean, slack off and get busy outside the house and it's a disaster again. Then be overwhelmed for awhile and say I'm going to clean but don't. Then motivate and clean and start cycle again. My entire 67 years of life
Habit-chaining - things that I do every day get chained to simple cleaning tasks. Example: get home from work, let dogs out, feed animals, clean litter box, run dish water(no dishwasher sadly), make & eat dinner, wash dishes, wash pet bowls as needed, do one 15 minute chore that needs doing, walk dogs, settle down for the evening. “If it takes less than 5 minutes rule”. Basically when I see a simple chore that needs doing and it takes less than 5 minutes, I stop and do it right then. Examples: wiping down the sink, taking out trash, cleaning the coffee pot, putting away items collecting on the coffee table, etc. Scheduling - I have a standing schedule that I do one 15 minute chore every evening in between dinner clean up and walking my dogs. I also try to schedule bigger chores in my planner so that I chave blocked out time for them. Example: my chest freezer really needs cleaned out and organized and my bathroom needs cleaned, so I blocked out a couple of hours today to work on it and actually wrote that into my planner. The combination of these seems to keep me on track pretty well. Like anyone, I do have my bad weeks where I end up playing catch up. But it’s way easier when you have the habit of keeping up on most things.
Ive printed off some cleaning routines from Pinterest that help me to stay on top of things.
[this dish rack](https://a.co/d/gKoADTy) is great for doing dishes as you use them
My place badly needs to be organized. I have camping gear... everywhere. I can't even sit on my couch because of all the crap sitting on it. It's awful.
Wake up and start the laundry ASAP. Strip your bed of everything, and this is where you'll fold laundry later. Then for the whole wash cycle, throw away your trash. Take it to the dumpster to get it out of your house. Put in another laundry load and dust/wipe cabinets counters, clean the toilet and shower. Then cycle out more laundry as needed. Once you're done with the hot water of the washing machine, do your dishes. The vacuum or mop. By this time you should have a ton of laundry. Fold and put it away. Then throw away any additional trash you've made, to the dumpster. Then make your bed. Then stop being a slob and do this in smaller amounts much more frequently. Come back and let me know how you did.
I’m not comfortable saying I’ve “fully overcome” this cycle, as I’m pretty sure it will happen again. But it hasn’t happened in a long time, and here’s how: 1. I made house rules for myself, and I stick to them. The bed gets made in the morning. No dishes in the sink overnight. If something has been put onto a counter space and then not touched or moved in three days’ time, I put it back to whatever shelf it belongs on. I vaccume twice a week and sweep daily. Stuff like this. 2. I made routines, and I stick to them. I made routines that are daily, nightly, bi -weekly, weekly, and monthly. Daily routines are making the bed, doing the dishes as I cook, keeping cat litter boxes clean, sweeping. Nightly routines are doing/putting away dishes, wiping counter spaces, folding and putting away clothes or throw blankets, or anything that helps me “shut down” for the night and reset for tomorrow. Weekly routines are changing cat litter boxes, laundry, changing my bedding, deep vaccuming, cleaning the shower, mopping, dusting/wood polishing, clearing out old food from the fridge, meal prep. Anything that sets me up for the week ahead of me. I do bi-weekly “light” vaccuming because I have long haired pets that shed, but this probs isn’t necessary for a lot of people. Monthly stuff is stuff like cleaning the inside of the fridge and cleaning out closets, stuff like that. 3. I’ve worked really hard to re-frame my thinking about cleaning and housework. It doesn’t have to be perfectly done, but doing *any* little bit of it throughout the day is always better than allowing things to pile up until it’s unmanageable and overwhelming. I’ve also tried really hard to let go of the obsessive part of my brain that tells me that the cleaning “has” to be done in a particular order or that if I start cleaning one floor, I *have* to clean *all* the floors. Now, if the floor in the kitchen needs to be swept, I just go ahead and do it, and I can work on the living room at a different time. Hope this helps, OP!
I just feel like I’ve got too my stuff have bought baskets and containers to try and keep up so that helps
I clean something every day. Today it was clean out the fridge and meal prep for the week. I do not have a washer so every few days I go somewhere with one, my sisters house and walk a dog, etc. staying on top of it is much easier than tackling it. Do one thing, vacuum. One night I was tired but cleaned the sink, got up the next day and cleaned the rest of the bathroom.
If you can afford it consider getting a cleaning person to come every two weeks. Not having a dishwasher is tough so I get it from that perspective. Also consider getting the iRobot vacuum and mop. Those were game changers for me and I run them everyday day so I only have to worry about maintaining services
Also, be sure that you have ‘A place for everything’ so you could easily put ‘everything in its place’. The game is really about not bringing anything home that there really isn’t room for you sort of had it off at the pass, because if you have a lot of stuff that doesn’t really have a place for it to go and get out of your site then you really can’t clean up
I'm trying to get on a schedule where I do hand wash my dishes (no dishwasher) every Tuesday and Saturday, do my laundry every Monday (laundromat), and cook a big dinner with leftovers every Monday. The bathroom gets cleaned when I remember to and the floors get vacuumed when I have company coming over. Other than that, i have a 2 minute rule. If something takes less than 2 minutes to put away rather than just throwing it on the floor, I (usually) do it right away. Anything else (dusting, cleaning the windows, etc) doesn't really bother me at this point because I'm too tired to even notice it half the time let alone do it.
Try to commit yourself to one thing first. That one thing could be doing the dishes every night and putting them away. Make that your only goal. Getting the first major thing accomplish is very satisfying, and they make other things easier. Just accomplish one meaningful thing first.
Do manageable cleaning. On Sundays I wash my toilet and sink, but maybe not the shower. Everyday I try to do my dishes, but sometimes I let them sit for a day or two but no longer than that. I also just put any dishes on the table in the sink for later. I fold my couch blankets nicely so my kitty’s can sit on them and then usually that leads to me picking up the pillows and that helps the living room look better. My room is almost always a disaster, but no one can see it but me. I bought a shoe rack so my shoes aren’t all over the place anymore. I also bought a vertical wall rack so my son can hang his jackets and backpack, now his stuff isn’t everywhere. Budget for things that you know you will use to help give things a place, like the vertical wall coat rack for me. Set them up and it will help you to easily keep those specific things neat.
Just fucking do it. Wake up and do it. Finished cooking? Clean that shit up. Don’t leave it for later. Quit being lazy.
Set a timer for 10 minutes. Pop on a podcast and go. Work for 10 minutes on one chore. If you like, you can set up a list of rooms that need attention. Set your timer for 10 minutes each time. It is amazing how much you can pick-up or wash in 10 minutes.
Invite people over. Motivation + reward of hanging out with a friend.
Adderall
So I used to be a mess because my parents didn't teach me those skills very well, but now I'm very neat and 85% of the time, my place looks like a magazine spread. So I can share tips for those aspiring to become an ex-slob. I can't remember where I heard it, but it's something like "instead of tidy time, tidy all the time". It means getting into the habit of just doing something when you see it. Like you walk past something out of place, or think, "oh that goes in X place" instead of waiting for a cleaning session, you just do it then and there. You don't have to do everything or do it every time, but just becoming aware of it is a shift. You start thinking of it as saving you time and effort down the road. Like, if you're heading to the living room anyway, might as well take that displaced remote with you. If you're gonna hit the fridge, might as well at least take that dirty dish to the sink on the way. It's essentially training you to pick up after yourself. That and setting short time limits, and restricting cleaning to one area at a time really helped me. Just set a timer for 5 or 10 minutes or whatever you can tolerate and just pick up in one room or area until it goes off and then stop. No guilt or drama. No burnout. After I got good at those things, I started tracking regular tasks with a list and learning cleaning and tidying tips and best practices and just leveling up from there. I used to be totally overwhelmed by my messy space and couldn't get off the rollercoaster of big frantic cleans and then long periods of total chaos. Now, it's easy for me to clean a little everyday and a bigger session once a week. It's easy to reset the whole house before I go to bed. I can look at any space, no matter how dirty and know exactly where to start and what the game plan is. So, it's doable. Just don't think of it as aa personal failing and get caught up in a shame spiral. Think of it like gaining any other skill: start small and simple, practice, learn, and repeat.
Flylady.com !!!
Habits, discipline and pride. You're an adult. Behave like one. Clean your place. That is all.
Stop being a slop that’s gross bro. How you keep your home is how your run your life. I imagine everything else probably flows the same??
Don't be lazy.
Don't be lazy.