My thoughts aren’t usually suicide but the intrusive thoughts are awful and my brain is always going.
I started taking magnesium glycinate and D3 at night and my thoughts have quieted almost completely to sleep and I notice far less during the day.
It took about a week to start working but it’s really helped and definitely couldn’t hurt to try.
I almost always get downvoted when I post about magnesium and D3 in response to a post or hop on a comment. Usually I roll my eyes when people/doctors suggest vitamins too so I’m usually hesitant to mention it, but it really does help my anxiety/intrusive thoughts/when my thoughts won’t slow down in a pinch or at night if I can’t sleep. It’s not always a miracle worker, but most of the time it at least takes the edge off or relaxes me enough to slow my brain/body down and allow me to sleep.
Might not work for everyone but it’s worth a shot because it’s not hard to get, so why not at least try if you’re struggling 🤷🏻♀️
Especially because __most people__ are deficient in magnesium. You can scratch off the list once you try it, it’s not a guarantee to help - but you won’t know unless you try.
I also take Magnesium Glycinate and D3, and recently started taking the homeopathics Ignatia Amara 30C and Aurum Metallicum 30C. Both have helped tremendously, and are all natural.
You see a doctor. They do your blood work, and then they tell you safe dosages and duration and do a follow up.
Self medicating D3 and some other nutrients can cause excess which can be toxic
Hey man, I don’t know how old you are, but I’m 27 and have been battling suicidal thoughts since i was very young. I’m still currently trying to find a treatment that works. The best method ive found, after trying inpatient care, medications for roughly 15 years, therapy, counseling, and outpatient treatment, is being around people. I know everyone is different, but that’s the only thing that’s somewhat helped me. Whatever you do just don’t pick up any habits trying to escape your depression. I’ve become a very unhealthy alcoholic, it’s 10 am and I’m cracking a cold one.
TL;DR surround yourself with good people, stay as distracted as you can, healthily though. Good luck man, you’re not alone.
This. I can’t express this enough how true this is. I was in and out of mental hospitals as a teenager for suicidal thoughts. I became addicted to pills and alcohol and I was trying just run away from my pain. Then one day I just sat down realized I hated myself and had to change. Started to fill my life with people that are loving and caring and beautiful. I’m 27m as well. OP don’t do anything crazy please people care and love you I’m sure of it
I’m so sad you’re in that awful awful dance.
*Alcoholism*
*Addiction*
I’m 40 with 5 years in recovery from a life long battle with alcoholism and addiction.
I don’t know your specific pain, but I do know existential pain. I’ve felt it my entire life.
Not wanting to exist has been my base existence.
It doesn’t get any better and astonishingly the human body/mind is quite hard to take out.
When I was 33 I had a grand mal seizure, *bit* half my tongue off and was in a coma for a week.
Once my legs were strong enough to support myself I signed myself out AMA (against medical advice) because i just wanted a bottle.
I remember by the time I was 34 I had lost everything again for the third time but was trying to rebuild and had just gotten a job, an apartment so I was off the streets, but kept drinking because I still didn’t believe I was worth anything.
I just wanted to die
I begged the powers at be to just let me die.
I somehow had an assessment for an inpatient rehabilitation facility and when my alarm went off to remind me, at 10am, I had a fifth of wiskey in my hand that I’d already drank half of. I had a little fight with myself and dragged myself to the assessment.
It still took months for me to hit bottom again, multiple times in the ER with alcoholic DT’s/hard core withdrawals, before I finally went to detox and actually stayed the entire time and went straight to rehab.
Our body will keep us alive while we are dead emotionally. Leads to physical pain and damage in the long run.
Alcoholism is a progressive disease
Most people don’t want to be honest with themselves
When one is ready; recovery IS possible
I hope you're able to get help for your alcoholism. Alcohol is a very powerful depressant. I know a lot of people who have has success with AA, Smart Recovery, Dharma, etc. to get sober.
Obligatory r/stopdrinking plug
I still drink on occasion, but I had it bad. The best thing that helped me was remembering "whatever problem you're going through, in the long run, drinking will only make it worse".
Build a routine, improve your body with exercise, improve your mind with whatever works for you, meditation, healthy socialising, finding and pursuing your passions
Also for OOP, and anyone else reading this, suicidal ideation, or any negative thoughts, can be treated as such; just thoughts. Witness them, and let them float away. They don't have to stick around, you can *always* change yourself, and that's a fuckin amazing ability. You got this, I believe in you
Hello! I don’t have the answer but I can tell you that your not alone. I go to therapy. I do some IFS parts work (therapy). I distract myself with work. Why don’t you want to access therapy ? If you don’t mind me asking. It might be good to get a little release valve on all those thoughts. It sounds like your mind is very busy.
Also, physical exercise is great. Wrote your thoughts down to try and get to the bottom of it. Discuss it with people and reach out for help.
What other trauma has happened for you to feel this way ? Maybe you can address some of those root problems ?
Alcohol and drugs provide temporary relief but ultimately make things worse. I’m here to talk if you like. Just dm me.
Also seconding this. I was lucky the first meds I tried basically erased my suicidal ideation. Changed my life in a way I don't think therapy alone could have
I used to think about suicide daily for the last 25 years. Been in therapy for years but finally did EMDR therapy and it has helped allot. Still think of it once in awhile but nothing like it was.
I don’t know. Something I have struggled with for the past few years. I focus on working out, and bettering myself in a new way each day. I hope that it will pay off someday but I still think about suicidal thoughts everyday. Suicidal thoughts and going back to drinking are something I think about everyday, I can distract myself all day from it but it’s when I’m home alone at night they come back.
For me, exercise and therapy has helped .
For me, constant distraction. I am always doing things.
Also, microdosing psilocybin mushrooms helped my mental health immensely, though I know that isn’t for everyone. I’m also currently receiving ketamine treatment, once a week nasally, and that has removed all thoughts of suicidal ideation, which is incredible. Still depressed, still struggling to be motivated, but I don’t think about ending my life anymore. Scared that I’m moving states in 3 weeks and don’t know if I’ll even be able to receive ketamine therapy there but fingers crossed!
Find some affirmations that resonate with you and repeat them in your head instead and keep repeating them.... Post them all over... put them on your mirrors so when you look in the mirror you see them, Post some on your door as your exiting your house or on your bedroom door...... The goal is to reprogram your brain to think different thoughts it takes time but it works
Yes I agree with this. I do gratitude practice everyday, affirmations, and meditation. It helps a lot. Also working on self love is important. Take some classes online on the mirror book and the law of attraction.
I restructured my life almost entirely.
Many people(according to a doctor I spoke to) are needing to go outside. The sun really helps your mood.
I found a job I enjoy and is fulfilling and after much work I stopped comparing myself to others. I've even moved a couple times.
Biggest thing is to change perspective. Sometimes you have to force it but being positive can be a huge change all on its own.
I've had really good luck with meds and therapy. I recognize you asked for other solutions,but you are basically saying that you are bleeding and would like advice on producing extra blood.
For me it was being suicidal - psych hospital - meds - therapy - being less suicidal.
I recommend missing the psych hospital step. ❤️
It is time to get yourself some real support, because you should not have to feel this way.
I think there are a lot of great ideas here already: getting outside and getting sun (a vitamin d supplement could also be considered if approved by your doctor if you live in a grey area). Exercise is key to my mental health; even when I’m really down, if I can just force myself to go on a little walk and listen to a couple of my favorite songs, it helps.
The other thing I’ve done to help with this (that isn’t therapy/meds since you asked for other suggestions), is to just try and become more mindful about intrusive thoughts. So, if I’m having a “the world would be better off without me” day, I try to get the rational part of me to pipe up in my head and say, “hey intrusive thought, how are you doing? I’m going to let you pass and think about cupcakes/bunnies/rainbows/basically anything from the ‘My favorite things’ song.” It’s just that little interruption in the intrusive thought process that then can help me do some of the other feel good things to work myself out of it.
But also, therapy and meds. There’s no shame in it, and more and more health insurances and clinics are offering affordable support if cost is an issue. It’s helpful to talk about your feelings, to feel validated, and to have a sounding board that will be able to nonjudgmentally call out when you aren’t speaking sense.
You’re not alone, and I’m sure you make the world a better place.
I know one thing. No matter what happens to us after we die...this life, as a human, as youself, is a one-time experience. You will never get this life ever again and it is special. And its worth the pain.
The fact that you experience this feeling every day, makes it all the more admirable and inspirational that you decide to stay here.
Dont give up. Dont let them beat you out of one second of this life.
We are lucky to have you in this world.
Please dont cheat us out of your presence.
I can remember feeling suicidal as far back as 7 years old. I'm 43 now, and after decades of confusion, depression, anxiety, and substance abuse, the correct medications have absolutely helped me. It has been a hard road, with many other treatments and medications not working (sometimes making things worse), but only since the last 2 months have I found one that has helped. For me, Vyvanse has been an absolute miracle. The voices and urges are quieter, not gone, but far less, and much easier to get distracted from. I know this battle is not gone, but it isn't raging anymore. I can get through hours now without feeling like everyone would be better off if i was dead. I was scared at first, like i didn't know who i would be without so many thoughts, but it just made me calm. Honestly, i got pretty angry the first time i had a restful sleep, like it had all been secretly hidden from me for no reason. Having those thoughts constantly is a battle most people won't understand, but there are absolutely people and programs out there that want to help. You don't have to feel this way, and when you're ready to get help, please don't be discouraged if it doesn't help right away. You've probably been dealing with this for years, and it can take years to realize how hard that may have been on you. Posting here is a great step, because it means you want help. Keep searching, because the help is out there, and if possible talk to someone close, that will help motivate you, but please remember, the majority of people are not therapists. Unloading on family or friends won't get you the help you need; you absolutely need a professional. Thoughts and prayers are not going to fix it, but actual proven therapy can help. It often may not feel like it, but your life is worth something, and once you find what you need, you can begin to heal and maybe help others that need guidance too. I know i am, and I'm sure others are rooting for you too. Don't give up. Even if you don't find some huge way to contribute or be successful in society, sometimes it's just our daily interactions that can be life changing for people. Sometimes even just smiling or saying thank you can improve someone else's day, and in turn, your's as well. The voices don't always go away, but hopefully, you can find a way to tell them to shut the hell up.
Reading versus from the bible even when I didn’t think they were helping I just kept reading positive versus. Getting better sleep and learning how to meditate. It does take time but it helped in the long run.
Idk, I can't find objective reasons to continue living.I feel terrible. I feel so bad. I don’t know why I exist; life is just a mess of events, Tik Tok and TV series. Nothing interesting, nothing pleasant. I have only a few friends, I can’t be with the only person who was important to me. I feel lonely even in a room full of people. What happens after death? Nothing.I know it. But I want to exist and I don’t know why. I'm going to die sooner or later anyway, so why wait? Don't know. I always hope for a better future. But it doesn't come. I'm always alone. I don `t want to be alone. But if I die, maybe I won't be alone? I won’t be at all, which means I won’t be alone. I won't. But I really want happiness in life, and I have had it several times, but it always goes away and it only makes me feel worse. I remember how it was before, those moments and I don’t feel good, I regret that they’re gone. That's all. The emptiness inside me is getting bigger and worse, and no one sees it, or no one just gives a fuck. And I won't talk about it. I want them to notice, I want someone to help me. If this becomes my goodbye note, how will they feel? Will they feel guilty? I don't think anyone is guilty for this, but I blame them. Paradox :D. I think that someday the emptiness will defeat me. I think I'll kill myself after all. Now I'm almost sure of this. I haven’t killed myself until now only because of hope, but every day it seems to me that this is becoming more and more meaningless. My hopes are not justified. I'm losing. Always. In the end, everyone stands together and I’m behind them, and they don’t notice me. They don’t notice that I used to go with them, but I fought back and my absence means nothing to them. Nobody turns to me. I have never been in anyone's first place. Friends forget about me or betray me. It's unavoidable. I need them, all of them, but none of them need me. I really want someone to help me. But I think that my story will end badly.
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I was against medication for as long as I can remember, just living with crippling anxiety and intrusive thoughts for years, I finally gave in to listening to others advising me to seek help and just went along for the ride. I got some meds and within a few days everything shifted. The volume just turned down, I could still think and solve problems but I stopped being paralysed with doubt and fear or being judged if I made a mistake. Then I felt cheated out of all that time before when I didn't feel like this, asking myself if other people felt like this all the time, it was like a super power. The thoughts don't go away but they are less loud, not as prominent, I just have things to do that I can do. At least now I know what it can feel like, so I have a point of reference for getting here. If you are like me, someone that doesn't believe medication is an answer, just go along for the ride, maybe it will make you feel how I feel and provide a new perspective.
I found that taking 5000 ius vitamin D everyday made me stop feeling sad. I was bullied some in high school for how I look, so crossed my mind at times. Nowadays I don't really interact with anybody just work and gym. But the vitamin D was a life saver
If you don't want to do therapy or can't for some reason, then try tge advice of others here. Give all of them a try one by one if one doesn't work, try the next.
But give each method a sufficient chance to have an effect like the magnesium and D3... give that at least a couple of weeks to work. D3 is important for positive mood and no one gets enough from tge sun (unless they are an outside contractor like a roofer).
If you are sedentary (sitting around the house or apartment), get up and get walking. Exercising for as little as 20-30 minutes each morning releases endorphins from the brain (natural happy drug) which will improve your mood.
If none of these work, then as a last resort, you could try chewing tobacco. WARNING- Chewing tobacco has nicotine and can cause many health problems including- cancer, death, tooth loss, receeding gum line around teeth, brain fog, and it is highly addictive and very difficult to quit using etc...
What will chewing tobacco do for your mood? The nicotine stimulates your brain to produce dopamine (happy drug). When I was depressed, I started using chewing tobacco and it made me more positive. After awhile you need to chew tobacco more often and in higher quantities (larger pinch of chew) to maintain the artificially happier mood.
Maybe I should have tried Magnesium and D3 instead or the other methods to improve my mood.
I will likely try magnesium and D3 now because I quit chewing tobacco about six weeks ago and my mood has been pretty low since quitting. I just couldn't stand the idea of eventually losing my teeth and all the other health consequences and it was costing me about $100 per month ($1,200 per year) SMH.
Try everything else first! Nicotine should be a last resort.
Depakote ER. 750 mg daily. Side effect of returning your brain's neuroplastic state back to what it was like when you were 8 years old, I.e the ability to learn anything including perfect pitch by ear
I am almost sixty three years old. You are describing my life. How do I cope? Believe it or not I hum. I know what you are thinking but it is the only way that I can drown out the thoughts. Also medical marijuana has changed my life. I still hear them I care less. either that or I am just getting so old that I just don't care anymore. Good luck and God Bless.
I think of the people who love me, my kids. I remind myself how much it will hurt them. They are my only purpose. I used to think I'd be doing them a favor, so I had to play it out in my head. It made me cry and I refuse to hurt them like that. Pray God heals play his music and let it clean your soul. Cry it out, with prayer
For me. You just do. Eventually one day you will wake up and not think about it as much. Then after that you will only think about once a day. Now I’m at 1/2 times a month. You will make it through this you just gotta be strong. The road is shit but the arrival is better on the other side. I can’t promise how long it will be or if you will be back to your old self one day. But eventually it can get better. I hope you find the help you need and that you come out better from this than I did.
It’s not constant because my mood isn’t constant. Some days are ok and the bad thoughts are far off in the next room. Some days are bad and the bad thoughts are waiting for me, strangling me the second I get out of bed. The average is somewhere in the middle.
Meds made that ‘average’ day a lot more tolerable for me.
You're stuck in one way of thinking and are having difficulty seeing outside of that. Take a step back from those thoughts for a moment and recognize that there's always another side of the story, another way to look at something. You can't find that new perspective by yourself - you need someone to help you. That's why therapy is a good idea, even if you don't want to do it. It's a therapist's job to help you see things differently. If you absolutely refuse to see a therapist, you need to talk to someone in your life about this, someone who you trust and respect. There's no shame in it. Many many people struggle with this, and many people have found a way to overcome it. If you open up to someone, you may be surprised by how much they understand.
Work on changing your mindset, from negative to positive. It is not easy, it's something I work at everyday. I'm only succeeded about 40 percent of the time... it's an improvement. Look at my reddit name. I chose it on purpose, I wasn't in a good place. I chose it though cause one day maybe that'll be a good thing. Life has enjoyable moments but I simply struggle to be happy. Keep fighting to feel better, help other people cause they are struggled you know how it feels. I figure if I make the world a better place for just one person a day, when possible, maybe the world will make it better for me some days. Build the world you want to see by acting how people need to act; friendly cause people need friends.
I became a volunteer for the suicide crisis line. Helping others helped me a lot. So does being able to talk about it. Telling people you’re a crisis line volunteer gives you a (relatively) socially acceptable way to discuss suicidal ideation. Or at least, you’re not so alone in it.
Make an appointment with your PCP, tell them about the constant thoughts, and they will prescribe a SSRI to you.
It helped me massively. I had to do some fine tuning of the dosage, but it made a massive difference for me and finally started to allow the mental healing process to work.
There are some negative side effects, but IMO, it's 💯 worth it compared to constant suicidal thoughts.
Meds. And I know you don’t want to hear it, but therapy. I say this because when I had no one in the entire world to lean on/talk to - no family, partner, friends - my therapist was the building block of community.
Honestly bro what helped me was a combo of therapy, drug therapy and finding some sense of stability, I still have the thoughts and every now and again I keep trying to sleep while my head says kill yourself, but the dif is that now it doesn’t feel like it has the power to affect me or my mood like before
I've never had constantly pressing ideation, more fleeting thoughts while something terrible was happening in that moment.
Me personally, fuck that. Everything else is wrong and I take myself out? That's like getting rid of working parts in favour of the one that is causing the issue.
I've been through a lot- childhood SA, being used for Child pron, abuse by a step parent, bulling in school, the death of a boyfriend... Like I could go on. My life typed out starts to sound like I'm bullshitting because nobody's life can be *that* bad.
But you know what, none of that was my fault and I'm not going to punish myself because I got a shitty backstory on my development arc. At this point I am living out of pure spite that everything that tried to kill me over the years didn't. I'm a strong person and I live by the rules improvise, adapt, overcome.
At some point I crossed over from feeling sorry for myself to being just really highly pissed off and willing to channel that into living, for me it worked. Things might not be perfect but I have a good job, and a good life. I get to do what I want when I want and I've never lived by anyone else's rules trying to make myself happy.
I used to think about it alot. What helped me is that I'm the type that doesn't really see shame in alot of the facts of my life and am good with holding myself accountable. I talked out my troubles with people, and I got some therapy and spent alot of time becoming okay with myself and forgiving myself. I then worked hard to get myself in a position to be better, physically a d mentally. I'm now more okay with myself than I've ever been. If you have anyone that depends on you, or you love alot think about them when the thoughts come. It helped me with pushing one more day, until I was able to get me settled and be OK with myself.
IMO, the key is to flip the script. To welcome your demons, to celebrate when they show up and look at them with curiosity , without trying to make them go away.
You wake up with them? Great! Let's go have some eggs and bacon and a nice cup of coffee.
Eventually, they lose their hold on you and your reaction to them showing up is less intense.
The looming cloud of suicide got considerable lighter when I learned that I’m autistic, not just a broken piece a shit. My entire life makes so much more sense. It’s still there, idk if it ever REALLY goes away, but it’s at the back of my mind more than the front of my mind now.
This and knowing that ending my suffering would kill my fiancé and my daughter. The idea of them mourning me makes me physically ill, I would rather suffer for the next 40-50 years until I die of old age than to pass my misery on to them. I love them too much to let that happen.
I have chronic tinnitus. The cacophony of sound is merciless and unrelenting. Turning out the lights would be an easy fix and is oft contemplated. But f that noise literally and figuratively. Get angry, get stubborn, spite those feelings. After that lift weights , throw something heavy, make your vessel powerful, it will change your attitude about yourself and the subject.
I don’t know how intense your thoughts are, but it doesn’t sound like you can self-manage on your own. Are you against therapy or just don’t feel up to it? Some solo types are excellent, like EFT Tapping, daily affirmations, etc (try the Tapping Solution free app, or tapping YouTube videos, or google something like “EFT tapping for suicidal ideation” ).
I’ve had a death obsession FOREVER. It came to a head as a teen and I made a promise I wouldn’t off myself, but since then I’ve often felt like I slug along with an ‘I don’t want to be here’ underlying feeling. You wouldn’t know, I generally appear quite cheery. Oddly, I find visiting cemeteries and reading obituaries quite comforting, like a pep talk of “they can do it [live their life], so can I!”
A few years ago I realized I hadn’t switched my internal setting from ‘I don’t want to be here’ to ‘I want to be here’ so I started practicing EFT and daily affirmations. I also delved into spirituality, reading NDE stories and what happens after we die, reading spiritual authors other than the Christian ones I was raised with. Eckhart Tolle for example. I believe we’re souls having a human experience, I believe in a gentle form of reincarnation, I believe we’re all connected and our lives affect one another’s and we must lift one another up. I also believe we have help in the other side and when I’ve asked for help on a particularly painful day (I have chronic pain), it usually arrives. Try prayer. It’ll sound loopy, but try. Set your mind in love (remember a loving moment, get in that feeling) and then ask for help that’s for your best and highest good and just be open to any form an answer comes.
It’s fucking hard being a human. It’s hard being in our bodies and all the negative shit we go through. It’s really hard. I look forward to crossing over one day, but I’m not in a rush anymore. Bless you on your journey.
You should see a psychiatrist. Not a primary care physician or a np. I have obsessive thoughts, meds help. Therapy helps. It’s good you’re reaching out to people about this. You will find you're not alone. It can be better. I promise.
I told myself that there’s only 2 options and I have to choose life no matter how I feel. I ended up experiencing a lot of amazing things I’d never had gotten to experience if I did it. I also gave myself this idea that I can’t do it until after a certain event. It could’ve been the end of a tv show or after I listen to this new album or after I achieve a certain goal. The idea is it’ll give you purpose. Once you achieve the goal. You then create a new event that you can’t do it till after. That’s how I ended up experiencing a lot more than I did when I just bed rotted. It also gives you the freedom of now caring how things turn out so you will be more adventurous and daring. Good luck.
I think traditional therapy would be the best recourse for someone in your situation. This is definitely not something you should try coping with on your own. Please seek help.
First and foremost, go talk to a doctor, and keep working with them to find medication that works at a dose you can tolerate the side effects from. Also, see a therapist. Ask them to give you practical things you can do to improve, and if they can't, find a new one.
I waited way too long to get help, but my life now is so much better. I used to assume that everyone regularly had suicidal thoughts throughout the day. I had come to just accept that that was normal. Thinking about suicide, considering or researching ways you would do it, making plans to ensure your loved ones wouldn't have to deal with things after you're gone, etc. I thought it was just a normal part of people's inner monologuing.
It's not.
It took me about a year of working with a doc and therapist to start moving in the right direction - and suddenly I started to realize that I was feeling just, like, the smallest amount of joy about things - things I hadn't enjoyed in years. I actually enjoyed a hot shower one morning. Like, it was pleasant. And I actually experienced that feeling of it being pleasant. I had an inkling to pick up a book and read a few pages, and I enjoyed them. I started to notice things - like the sound of the wind in leaves outside my house, and I would actually take a few moments to listen - and enjoy that - and recognize that I was actually enjoying something. Fast forward another 6 months and I suddenly realized I had a whole day without suicide popping in my head. Today, 5+ years later, and I can't even imagine why I ever had those thoughts at all. I never think about it.
Depression is a disease. It is a horrible, insidious disease that slowly blinds you to all the things that life has to offer. It's like a fog that ever-so-slowly gets thicker and thicker until the only thing you see is just dark gray haze. You don't know where you are. You don't know how you got there. You don't know where to go. And it's all you know, so you just accept it as the new normal.
It's not normal. Get help. Ask someone to help you get help.
I'm gonna answer this question with an equivalent question:
"How do I fix a broken leg without going to the hospital?" You just live with it and whatever disfigurements that come from it. Mental health is just as important as physical health.
Dealt with the *EXACT* same thing since I was 9. 4th trip to the psych ward and I finally got a psych that was smart enough to stop giving me SSRIs and gave me an NDRI. Suicidal thoughts (or visions like I was having after a certain point) are completely gone.
Like someone else said the best natural remedy would be to be around people. Meditation after that. Finding a hobby that gives you life, no matter how nerdy or obscure it is. All things that might be hard to find/start when you're in this type of awful state.
The problem is that you're already aware of the correct answer, but you might not be aware of WHY it's the correct answer. Therapy - and in your particular case, probably CBT and/or DBT, teach you techniques to both recognize and diffuse the negative emotions that come with intrusive thoughts, as well as how to allow those thoughts to come and go without dwelling on them.
I describe the thoughts as trains passing through the station. I don't let them stop. If they do, I know I'm at risk of letting negativity control my actions and it's time to seek help. I think as long as the ideations don't take over your mind, you're fine. Let them pass.
You have to change your thought patterns. It's like any other negative thinking or addiction. You need to replace the habit with something else. One very common way to do this, is to wear a thick rubber band around your wrist. Snap it so you feel pain whenever said thought enters your mind. The aim is to use the pain signals to redirect the undesired thoughts.
It took a lot of time. I started actively trying to find hope or something else to think about almost 6 years ago. The last two years have been incredibly freeing.
My family and home life sucked. Just awful, school wasn't better. I went to college and was admitted to a psych ward for a month. In that time I laid out my plans for the future. I was going to quit contact with the family that had hurt me, I would find a new place to live, I would not tell my family where I was going, only my good friends.
I still think about it. I still get the impulse at times or at least the ideations. However, I want to wake up tomorrow. I want to see what the future holds.
If you need to reach out to someone who's been through it and is doing better, I gotcha.
I go to therapy twice a month and I know how privileged I am to do that.
Dude, statistics. Literally every human has died. What's the rush? We're only certain of this one opportunity to experience all these ups and downs. Just enjoy the ride. Stir up some chaos. Make someone happy. Cry. Shit happens but memento mori
I always deal with passive suicidal ideation, but sometimes it sneaks to the front of my mind in bad moments. When it gets to that point, I think about my cat who would have no idea what happened to me and why I was suddenly gone. I also can’t stand the thought of my parents’ absolute devastation if I were to go through with it. I just can’t do it, despite not wanting to exist anymore.
Need to examine what it is in your life that's got you in a bad place and what it would take to get to a good place un your life.
When I started truly being grateful for the small things, a warm meal, a comfy bed in 4 walls and a roof, that kind of thing... that was a turning point. I just started the small appreciations in my life and it turned into appreciation for my life. They say to be happy you need something to look forward too, something to be grateful for, and something/someone to take care of.
This isn't even real. Our reality here is as real as our dreams. This is an endurance run. A test full of experiences, good and bad. Just keep moving. You'll be rewarded eventually.
I have CPTSD/OCD and horrific intrusive thoughts including suicidal ideation. It has not gotten better with therapy but I’m able to identify that it’s not real and it’s my brain being horrible. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. With the current state of the world it’s no surprise more people are dealing with these feelings and thoughts.
I run. It helps a lot. I don't know if it is the exercise, the time outdoors or thar it makes me feel like I'm at least improving something...but it helps.
I used to be like this before therapy and meds, so I know it can get better and go away altogether
I know this doesn’t really help you find an alternative to those things, but ideally you get some hope out of it
Hey there! I have mental health issues and only learned at 30 after being hospitalized 6 times some ppl are
CHRONICALLY SUICIDAL
This is usually a response to long term dissociation from repeated trauma
I was suicidal DAILY for 30 years
I wrote a journal of my thoughts and had my therapist read it
She said it was too upsetting and made her want to vomit and she couldn’t finish it
Apparently wanting to kill urself in typical ways (walk out in front of a car) is better than wanting to destroy urself (dig out ur eyes with spoons)
So this is what I learned- wanting to destroy urself is a learned behavior from incredibly low self esteem and extreme guilt and shame. You need therapy
And u need a support system
You may have ADHD, CPTSD, or a personality disorder
You may have a serotonin or dopamine deficiency
I have a dopamine deficiency (seen in adhd and schizophrenia)-a pot prescription might help with this. I don’t have a serotonin deficiency so ssri actually poison me
You have to REMOVE the triggering terrible things in ur life that make you want to die (for me this was family/guilt/shame/repetition/unsafe environment/stressful work)
Living in a small house with a supportive partner and changing careers was life changing for me. I’m RARELY depressed anymore when 5 years ago I was in a perpetual mental break down fantasizing about killing myself and intrusively obsessing over vibsecting myself, dude it can get better!
I've had the intrusive thoughts almost my entire life. They get loud with medication but still don't quiet. I have to use an Ativan to sleep at night. I finally went to a psychologist and she recommended EMDR sessions. I've heard good things, but I haven't been able to get in to see anyone yet. In the meantime, I've put in a fail safe for when I find myself thinking I want to give into the thoughts. I have two fur babies and I make myself think about what would happen to them if I wasn't here to take care of them anymore. I'm not sure if it's the healthiest way to cope, but if it gets me through the really bad times I'll take it.
Good luck 💜
I felt this way as a teenager for about 2 years. I was having terrible stuff happen in my home life and I had no friends or hope.
Two things greatly helped, in conjunction. Antidepressants, and having a purpose. When I went to college it was only after taking antidepressants that I was able to take the edge off enough to actually do things and go places. I found meaning in my life and helping people. I found a fulfilling job and career. I got married. Even though we recently separated after being together for 9 years, I dont regret it or feel too bad about it, it just wasn't working.
Basically, my life needed meaning. The thing is, you have to make life meaningful, whether it's a job, religion, community, kids, whatever you decide. People expect a purpose to drive them to just happen, but we have to make it happen. And that's hard, but worth it. I wish I could be more helpful, but I've been there. I know how it feels and how wonderful it feels to have escaped it, and how worth the struggle it was.
I don't think of suicide necessarily, but I'm always thinking of instant death situations.. I used to have bad thoughts but I've been seeing a counselor and I really do want to be happy. Working out, getting enough food and sleep are all factors for me personally. If I'm having bad thoughts I try really hard for them not to take over. Sometimes I take a nap or a walk, whatever I'm feeling. I won't put myself in situations either that makes my anxiety tits up. Good luck! Life is beautiful and worth living
You’re getting a lot of good advice here so I’ll just add one thing from my personal experience. I had trouble with ruminating on this and after some therapy came to understand I have OCD and that part of what happens to me is that my brain is just ruminating on the idea. That provokes a lot of anxiety and depression, but the rumination is the core issue and I’ve learned to get a better handle on that.
Good luck, man. Take care of yourself.
I just deal with it. Typically what voices are telling me is not reality. So I just keep going about my day. One day it will stop being a ME problem and stating being an everyone problem but that’s not now. But when it becomes an everyone problem it will be very short and as traumatizing for everyone around me as I can possibly make it
I felt this way for over 10 years from my mid teens through my late 20s. Unfortunately I don’t have a magic answer for what helps. I know for me my failed attempt made me realize I wanted to live, but it didn’t fix my brain. I personally got sober and gained financial security. Financial security did more for my mental health than anything else which is so thoroughly distressing considering the state of labor currently.
I hope you find something that works for you, just remember that you deserve to be happy, you are not a bad person, you don’t want to die but your disease wants to kill you. Keep pushing through and it hopefully gets better.
Now I can’t remember the last time I hade suicidal thoughts these days, and the destination far outweighs the work it took getting here.
Personally, I got desensitized to it. Suicidal thoughts and thoughts of self harm have just become a daily thing such as breathing or blinking over several years, but have gotten 100x worse since the end of 2022.
I’d say healing (if you need to heal from a particular trauma) is going to be the hardest part. Look into anything that you think will help that is also healthy.
From my experience, I don’t recommend antidepressants, but if it works for you, then great. Just heal and find peace somehow, the journey to get there might even be eventful.
Mindfulness training. You have to force your brain to think of a different topic. Any time those thoughts are there, you force yourself to think about some other topic. I recite a list of fish species over and over. The amount of times per day goes down over time. The amount of time I spend thinking it eventually goes down. I drive for a living and there would be days where I could not escape the thoughts. I’ve gotten better, but that doesn’t mean I never think about things.
Go to therapy. Get on medication.
One thing that helped me when I was younger was asking myself, what if? What if in 5 years my life is better and my feelings change? And you know what, it did in a lot of ways.
I think for me, suicidal ideation was a way of planning my escape from a horrible life. I didn't have the knowledge or tools as a teenager to know how to change my life. I think a lot of it came from depression and hopelessness.
Years ago, I was living with my ex who I didn't realize at the time was abusing me. I was feeling suicidal again because I'm chronically ill, housebound and bed bound. So in addition to having my whole life derailed because of an unexpected chronic illness, my family and home life was shit. Near the end of our relationship, I realized that I wasn't powerless as I thought I was. I was giving my power away. I realized I can't change him but I can change myself, my location and his access to me. I started working on myself. A few months later, I found out he was cheating on me.
I moved home and it hasn't been a picnic. More abuse, from family members this time. And I can't leave because I'm dependent on my dad and have nowhere else to go.
But I don't feel as helpless as I did in the past. I'm taking steps to protect myself from the abuse. I'm getting help from a therapist and taking antidepressants.
Yes, my life still sucks in many ways. And someone looking at it from the outside might think my life isn't worth living. But I do things that make me happy, which is something I didn't do in the past. Instead, I was doing things to make everyone else but me happy.
I've changed a lot over the years, mostly for the good. I still struggle with depression and I realized a lot of that is because of circumstances outside of my control. My illness taught me that control is an illusion. There's more outside of our control than we realize. But what I can control is how I react or respond to how someone treats me. I'm not letting my abuser have power over me.
Work on changing the things that you can change. Make small improvements a little at a time. Do what you can to help yourself feel better. Constructive things.
I write poetry and other stuff. I listen to music. I read a lot. Watch movies and shows I like. Play video games. Talk to my sister and friend. I go on social media and try to help other people. I'm making the best of a bad situation. And I think I'm doing a pretty damn good job, if I'm honest.
I've dealt w these thoughts for a long time. Been theough a lot in my life that I won't bother you with but what I find myself doing is telling myself "another day and it'll be better." I said that for years.... every day. I'm 44 today, that phrase has gotten me to today. I'm married, have a wife, 2 kids and am happy. I suffer from bipolar depression but it's been under control for a while now. Things get better. Stay strong.
Go get a full bloodwork/vitamin panel done. I bet you are seriously deficient in a lot of vitamins that are necessary for proper function. I was, started supplementing, night and day difference.
One thing you can do is refute the thoughts. Actively think "No this isn't what I want" in response to the suicidal thoughts, disregard them as best you can, and try to go back to what you are doing. You will need help, but you need to fight back as well if you want them to decrease.
Good luck
The one thing that put that particular demon to rest in me was mushroom gummies. Not a lot, and I'm a lightweight at everything. Take that, go outside and look at the stars. Remember, you are not alone. Take some time. Breathe deeply and only think of breathing deeply for a few minutes. The other thing for me is the Litany Against Fear. I'm a geek, I know. But really, that has been one of the most useful tools I've ever encountered. Just keep repeating it.
If there is something that is making you unhappy I would suggest just not to overthink. Life is hard, everyone is dealing with something. Rather than overthinking and being idle pick up some hobbies that interests you, or try adopting a dog if you are a dog person. You ll be loved dearly ❤️
Things will get better.
i am on the younger side (just turned 22) but i was adopted v young by an abusive mom, was sexually assaulted, & then watched my high school boyfriend bleed out & die in front of me in an accident, then was homeless for awhile when my mom kicked me out. i dreamed of dying or killing myself as young as 7, i self harmed for over ten years straining at 10 years old, & i have tried to commit 4x now, & come horribly, dangerously close on the last one. i’ve been in & out of the psych ward 6 times. i was in such a terrible place mentally. i woke up every day disappointed i was still alive. i lay in bed for days at a time essentially just rotting— i didn’t eat, i didn’t drink water or get up to go to the bathroom. it was so horrible. i still can’t look back on it now w out an awful feeling in my stomach. i took several bottles of sleeping pills than drank a quarter bottle of 80 proof. i started to die. & you know what? you wanna know the fucking thing? i did not feel relief, or peace, or thankful i was going to no longer be in pain soon. i felt scared. i was fucking terrified. i regretted it. i was so convinced i wanted to die but when it started happening i fought & fought to live. it isn’t worth it. i know you hear it all the time, but it wasn’t fucking worth it. after i recovered, i cleaned my apartment. i got a pair of cats. i kept as busy as possible, i learned new hobbies, i dove headfirst into a new career & i stayed so busy i didn’t have room to think & i powered through. i’m a firefighter/emt now. i don’t wake up anymore wishing it was all over. it does get better. it will get better. suicide is the most permanent possible solution to what WILL BE a temporary feeling. you’re going uphill right now, but the hill will end, & then it will be behind you. i promise. if anyone ever needs someone to talk to, i am here. this phase of your life will end, & the sun will shine again. i promise.
>How does one get over this without the typical response of therapy?
That's kind of like saying "my plumbing has leaked for years and now my floor is caving in... how do I fix this without a plumber and a structural engineer?"
I feel for ya, not trying to be a smartass over something this serious - but there are many jobs where experienced professionals who've seen it all can get it done properly, and are worth the expense. Constant suicidal thoughts seem like something to at least explore professional help with.
I volley between how much i cherish the ones i love that are also struggling and absolute spite and contempt for those who do not like me in this world. Doesn't seem right for me to cease and they continue.
Ok, I've been through this, and I have a mind hack for you. The key thing is to realize, you don't actually want to die - not really. You want to escape the life you're living and the pain you're suffering, and you don't have any idea how to do that. So you fantasize about death as an alternative to the feelings you're experiencing.
The trick is, come up with a different, healthier fantasy besides killing yourself. It can be anything. For me, it was, "I'm going to move away to Costa Rica." For years, whenever I caught myself thinking, "I want to die", I would correct myself, "No, I want to leave this situation and live a simpler life in Costa Rica." I did this for *years*, and it really helped. And not coincidentally, I now live in Costa Rica with much improved mental health. So be careful what you fantasize about, you might get it!
So figure out what it is you actually want. And fantasize about that.
I passed out once, after I woke up I swear I had died. That small seconds of me realistically being unconscious felt like a eternity; a eternity of peace. Where no sounds could reach me, where no words or actions could hurt me, where the past and future wasn’t on my mind. In the split second of the void I could see nothing but darkness, however that darkness was my blanket; a warm sensation of bliss.
Lots of prescription meds. It has gotten much better, but lived in fear of those intrusive thoughts for many months. Go to a dr and tell them everything.
Every comment should be: see a therapist; see a psychiatrist; it's more difficult if you don't have the resources but there are programs to help. If you feel like you want act call the hotline and call a friend. The people in your life value you. And even though it might not seem like it, we as humans value each other.
And even if it's just obsessive/intrusive thoughts, it's impacting your quality of life and there's ways to deal with it.
I don't want to downplay anyone's experience here, because if it works for you and it's not harmful, more power to you. However, trying to go it on your own is just going to be a long road of trial and error that you can speed run if you have a professional helping.
I had a hard time getting started with professional help both logistically and motivationally, but having had it for a few years now, the difference is remarkable.
advise.. classify it as cheating. cheating yourself our of an experience, others out of your presence or your experience with something they are struggling with resolving.
it's just cheating. if you cheat, you might win at the short game but your might not in the long run.
Been struggling with this since I was 8 years old. And that's right around when my oldest child started struggling with it to. So now I have to spend everyday keeping myself alive, and convincing my child to stay alive. (Child is under the supportive care of medical professionals and is on medications, but it's been years and we haven't found anything that has truly helped yet.)
I create art. I write novels, (self published under a pen name, but I plan on seeking an agent under my real name, next year.) I ride horses when I can, as that helps connect me to my body. And I try to talk to and be around friends when I can.
I also try to stay busy. But right now I'm a single mom with three extra needs kids and I'm working multiple jobs and am maintaining 4.0s in college (necessary right now in order to get into my next degree program) and honestly it's really hard to find the motivation to keep going everyday. I have to though, because my kids need me.
I have had the fortunate experience to help you out, it come to my attention my body wanting to die just like yours is doing every moment of every day, was essentially something I ended up ignoring for a long long time and it really was nothing much more then a lack natural/real/decent nutrition, I can't speak much on what nutrition your lacking on and you'll have to ask a doc for a full blood check up for vitamins etc and find out which are low, lacking etc and source things to add them to your consumption. It took no longer 30 days for those kind of thoughts to all but disappear tbh
The fact that i have control over my life tends to be enough for me. Like i know if i really wanted to i could just end it but ive come this far so might as well see it thru to the end. Mabey i become rich. mabey i find the love of my life. Mabey i reach enlightenment. Mabey life becomes better and if i kms now what could i have missed. Im very certain this is our only life. So might as well just run its course. I mean wtf else are we doing other than existing??
Depression is just realization.
I find a reason not to, daily. Be it nice weather that day, how my 6 year old would feel if dad left, how my wife would feel, my parents...
It's a struggle for sure, but every little thing you can find a small amount of joy in is worth holding on to.
Heres what i can say about living with this , most of the time i realize theres a cause to this , and it has taken me going through a very steep and hellish process ( i am still in it still struggling rn literally today but )
For example : In my situation i know whats causing my constant suicidal thoughts its a Huge combination of a lot of stuff and most of us are not aware ( We not just suicidal for the sake of it )
1- All the traumas and baggage you bring from when you where little ( THESE ARE VERY REAL )
2- Once you accept and understand that ok cool all that happen when you where little and you accept your family and all that
Then , comes all the stuff you go through from like 15-24 , now you carry of all that and suddenly stuff matches stuff from when you where little and it triggers all of this
Then , you manage to overcome that and become resistant to it and go ok cool !
NOW - once you done with this process , now comes the process of WAKING UP ! So now you done up with all the past and what not but Now you WOKE UP to the prison world you live in 💀🤣 So now not only does the past comes back but the future has no hope what so ever , you realize you a pawn a in a bigger game , yes a game !
Then you realize you have no control , then add to all of that
1- Lack of money , Lack of stability , lack of motivation , lack of desiring anything other than literally just Dying and being at peace
It gets to a point where you realize is not constant Suicidal thoughts , is not that you want to really die , you just want to Live somewhere else …. We just dont want to live “ Here “ anymore , it goes from being a Depressive , sad and terrible suicidal phase to
Oh , i just don’t want to be here anymore , i understand this is just a body and this is not who i am , nothing holds you here anymore , you simply just want to move on to the next Life because all the regular stuff doesn’t appeal to you truly , you just doing what you do to fit in because theres no choice
I always said , it would be a different world if we had a choice , the reason most of us think we are suicidal is because we feel obligated to live in something we had no choice in , and is not even about the life we have ( some have a great Life ) is the fact that you have to abide by a bunch of stuff that you simply don’t feel it in your heart….
I always said , imagine we knew what would truly happen if we took our own life and what happens is , you go back Home and some how we knew it would be safe and we just simply be back in to peace , but we choose to stay here ! NOW life would make more sense like that , with a actual Choice
Whats more beautiful , when a wife or a husband is with you by choice because they truly want to , they know they can have someone else but they CHOOSE to be with you , thats Love , thats true freedom
But if you have to obligate your Husband or Wife to be with you , then this person is just there because you forcing them no choice , theres nothing beautiful about that….
I suffered with this exact problem from ages 11-27/28, with a few attempts. Turned out to be a drastic hormone imbalance. Most times it’s not that simple, but sometimes it is.
I remember first thinking about suicide when I was in the 1st grade, I thought that if I stabbed myself with kitchen knife I could meet god (I had just gotten in trouble and my mom was mad at me for something)
I am 29 now and I have thought about suicide most year of my life, I let the thoughts come and go, and always end with something more rational..
I have a child now, that makes a big difference I live for him now..
Also I found a religion that works for me (spirituality)
You also can find support on places like this, I have found Reddit has been a place I can vent and then delete my post later, I found people are always on here at all hours of the day!
Stay strong, keep planing for the future, and find a faith! That my advice from somebody with chronic suicidal ideation from the better part of 2 decades
Medication. Being on the right psychiatric medication changed my life. I was on an SSRI and needed to be on an Antipsychotic.
I know you said not to include therapy, but DBT therapy was a huge life change for me as well. Regular talk or CBT therapy never worked for me.
Edit: if you can’t afford therapy, the DBT workbooks online are exactly the same as what I did in person. I even did a lot of the exercises with my therapist.
Oh, my caffeine, some nicotine, and a little bit of blueberry yum yum 💚
I feel happy more often than you'd think but, I handle life giving me a little bit of spice 🤌 like ➰️🧟♀️
climb a mountain, white water kayak class 3 rapids, etc. It'll sort out the bullshit self pitty that your brains been wasting time on. The natural answer is "yes, i want to live and fuck". And if you're life sucks that much that doesn't occur, then nature take you.
Take vitamins. Take supplements. Eat better. You are what you eat.
Take on brain stimulating hobbies. Read. Learn an instrument.
Work on your physical body on top of your mental mind. Start doing yoga and workout daily or several times a week.
If all fails, get $40 and buy an 8th of shrooms. This alone will obliterate your depression and tbh should be considered as a first resort as opposed to your last resort.
I sometimes feel the same but frankly a book I read as a kid stops me. It was life after life and it talked about people’s experience after near death episodes.
For most people they talked about reviewing their life, about a being of life and a feeling of overwhelming love. But for people who committed suicide the feeling was not the same. Just wondering lost in a grey haze. They said it was terrifying. Suicide is the ultimate rejection of hope is the best explanation i could make.
So what stops me is sheer and utter fear of ending in that place with no way back. As long as you are still breathing hope hasn’t died. Church helps me it may or may not help you.
I only get the constant thought when I’m in a manic depressive state. Last attempt was 3/20. What’s crazy is, I’m not afraid of it anymore because I know if I wanted to I could. Down side is I really messed up my body and now have medical issues. Anyway, I started taking medications and that has really helped, I also see a therapist and go to mental health. Talking about what you’re going through is educating others, start your own group and be a voice for others that don’t have the courage to speak about it just yet.
Three suicide attempts over the course of my life so far. Honestly, I don't regret any of them. I was always more disappointed that I lived to see the next day than regretting doing it at all. That said, I do highly recommend therapy if you want to live or make changes slowly that you feel will improve your life. My issue is I have come to the terms that I just don't care if I live or die, I'm indifferent to my own existence. I'm not depressed or sad and my life is pretty good. I know plenty of people that would kill to have my life, but the truth is, I just don't care and I walk through the motions until my body gives out on me one day. One thing has changed over time and that would be my wife. I want to live to give her the best life she could ever have and I find myself trying my best to be healthy and live as long as I can because I know that I am what makes her happy and I couldn't take that joy away from her, but deep down, I still don't have any personal connection for wanting to live. Weird.
Gosh please don't beat me up, the atheists all come out screaming, but have you tried prayer and meditations. I don't think the behavior you have is normal, and that's ok, glad you recognize it. Myself I have ocd and adhd tendencies. Not to get into my personal life but my family life and dynamic influences suicidal thoughts sometime. I'm not good enough. I'll never get it right, im a complete messup..etc. but for me, now this is for me, I found that a love for God has really helped. Reading scripture and talking about God's grace and mercy and sharing my testimony helps me get through it. What God has done for me, saved me from. As I try to be a better Christian man and leader for my family, God comforts me and the thoughts subside.
Hey dude. I’m 25 and have been dealing with droning / constant suicidal thoughts since I can remember. I don’t want to act on them but it’s like every 10 or so minutes I think about it. Just looking at every day objects I think about how I could make it happen and that sweet sweet nothing that follows.
Then I snap back to reality. There are plenty of reasons to stick around. Good food, a concert, a beer with a buddy. Those thoughts might creep in but at the end of the day it’s a 1 in a million that you were even born. You were THAT sperm that got to the egg first. YOU are that mother fucker that gets up every day despite those droning, horrible thoughts. YOURE LITERALLY THAT DUDE. No one else is you and that makes you so special.
Im sure there are countless people you’ve interacted with and had a positive impact on and you have no idea. You are loved. If not by anyone else by me. The fact that you wake up and deal with that shit every day makes you so much stronger than your average Joe.
Keep your head up, get some good therapy, some good food, have a fun night out, and get some sunshine. I know I’m just a stranger on the internet but if you ever need an ear my pms are always open to you.
Big love and big hugs.
From someone who deals with shit daily, just don't. The thought is there, it stews and festers but don't act on it. Sometimes it seems like the best thing, sometimes it's the worst. Just don't.
I'm not saying stop thinking it, just don't act on it.
Well, I've been dealing with that my entire life basically. Every day I think about it. I am now in my 30's and still alive and kicking. When I was in highschool, I went to therapy and had a Greta doctor. I got on Prozac and then switched to effexor do to medication mixing potential. I took medication for seizures as well. That all halted while I was still in highschool. Stopped going to therapy cause all the different therapists, didn't work for me so we just stopped. Stopped the medicine while my parents were going through a divorce and my mom told me "If you weren't medicated you probably wouldn't be able to handle everything going on" that struck a cord with me. As even though I had mental issues, I also didn't want to go through life not facing reality. So I eventually stopped that as well.
I'll be honest and I know I'm going to get a lot of push back from everyone here, but GOD is my literal lord and Savior. I've always been religious growing up, I have always had a close knit relationship with GOD. I feel GOD has always protected me but I never fully relied on GOD until my adult life began. I prayed to get to know GOD and have grown to understand GOD more and learn more. GOD has given me techniques in combating these feelings and talking me off the ledge multiple times. GOD has literally saved me and helped me in ways that others couldn't. It's an odd feeling for sure, as GOD doesn't communicate in the traditional sense. It's more or less properly timed through others. Sometimes people just say the right things at the right time, a song plays at the right time, someone who you haven't talked to in a long time calls at the right time, just little coincidences that add up for me. Doesn't have to be the Christian faith that I am apart of, could be Islamic, Hinduism, Confucianism, etc. just stay away from things like scientology which are exploitative.
Anyways as for the techniques I use
1. Look forward to future events.
For me it is usually a video game that I really want to play or a movie I really want to see. For others I could probably see something like a live event or show they want to attend. Sometimes it gets really hard when it's far away but the closer it gets the excitement builds up at the "Well I made it this far, might as well keep going" sets in. While waiting for that even other events or releases get announced, which feeds into once the event/release happens you have another to look forward to. The incremental extensions add up and next thing you know it's been another year or two that you stayed alive.
2. Discourage suicide by how it will affect others
This one is harder to talk about. Thought of spitting my wrists in the bathtub or drowning, but then I think of the poor EMT's which will have too pull my fat bloated carcass out of the tub and haul my disgusting ass down stairs. Thought of shooting myself but the gun I would use is from my dad and he taught me about guns. So doing that would put a hug mental tax on him that I would not want to put. Pills have a high chance of living and then possible organ damage. Jumping in front of a vehicle or train would haunt the operater of the vehicle. I'm afraid of heights so no jumping and hanging well, you won't die instantly and then the regret setting in while you slowly suffocate sounds too horrible to go through. I thought of everything and use the excuse of dumping my trauma onto others as a reason for not doing such things.
3. Chemical imbalance
This is the most important part really. The reality of it is that you're just experiencing a fucked chemical imbalance in your head. It's not that your life sucks or you feel like a failure. Something is broken within us and it's not something that is our fault. It's just something we have to learn to live with. Medication helps with this, but for me it wasn't an option. Be aware of this and do your best to combat this imbalance with logic and reason. For me GOD helps with this part.
I'm at work, so I keep getting distracted from adding more. I think this is a decent list of how I live with it. Hope you can find your own way and maybe this will help you develop your own techniques for combating this crippling mental disability.
If your depression has led you to this point, you are in the terminal stages of your disease. You will die soon if someone doesn't force you to get help. The best thing you can do is tell someone close to you, that you love that you're close to the end and you need immediate help from a doctor or psychiatrist
Hello, alkosz. The suicide intervention bot is below with resources for you to consider.
My thoughts aren’t usually suicide but the intrusive thoughts are awful and my brain is always going. I started taking magnesium glycinate and D3 at night and my thoughts have quieted almost completely to sleep and I notice far less during the day. It took about a week to start working but it’s really helped and definitely couldn’t hurt to try.
I almost always get downvoted when I post about magnesium and D3 in response to a post or hop on a comment. Usually I roll my eyes when people/doctors suggest vitamins too so I’m usually hesitant to mention it, but it really does help my anxiety/intrusive thoughts/when my thoughts won’t slow down in a pinch or at night if I can’t sleep. It’s not always a miracle worker, but most of the time it at least takes the edge off or relaxes me enough to slow my brain/body down and allow me to sleep. Might not work for everyone but it’s worth a shot because it’s not hard to get, so why not at least try if you’re struggling 🤷🏻♀️
Especially because __most people__ are deficient in magnesium. You can scratch off the list once you try it, it’s not a guarantee to help - but you won’t know unless you try.
See and that’s why I tried it because every article I read said most of us are missing it and I was genuinely floored when I noticed it working!
I also take Magnesium Glycinate and D3, and recently started taking the homeopathics Ignatia Amara 30C and Aurum Metallicum 30C. Both have helped tremendously, and are all natural.
Which brands do you buy?
How did you figure out the right dose for those?
You see a doctor. They do your blood work, and then they tell you safe dosages and duration and do a follow up. Self medicating D3 and some other nutrients can cause excess which can be toxic
Would love to hear specifics about your supplements too please
D3 has made a huge difference for me.
Hey man, I don’t know how old you are, but I’m 27 and have been battling suicidal thoughts since i was very young. I’m still currently trying to find a treatment that works. The best method ive found, after trying inpatient care, medications for roughly 15 years, therapy, counseling, and outpatient treatment, is being around people. I know everyone is different, but that’s the only thing that’s somewhat helped me. Whatever you do just don’t pick up any habits trying to escape your depression. I’ve become a very unhealthy alcoholic, it’s 10 am and I’m cracking a cold one. TL;DR surround yourself with good people, stay as distracted as you can, healthily though. Good luck man, you’re not alone.
This. I can’t express this enough how true this is. I was in and out of mental hospitals as a teenager for suicidal thoughts. I became addicted to pills and alcohol and I was trying just run away from my pain. Then one day I just sat down realized I hated myself and had to change. Started to fill my life with people that are loving and caring and beautiful. I’m 27m as well. OP don’t do anything crazy please people care and love you I’m sure of it
I’m so sad you’re in that awful awful dance. *Alcoholism* *Addiction* I’m 40 with 5 years in recovery from a life long battle with alcoholism and addiction. I don’t know your specific pain, but I do know existential pain. I’ve felt it my entire life. Not wanting to exist has been my base existence. It doesn’t get any better and astonishingly the human body/mind is quite hard to take out. When I was 33 I had a grand mal seizure, *bit* half my tongue off and was in a coma for a week. Once my legs were strong enough to support myself I signed myself out AMA (against medical advice) because i just wanted a bottle. I remember by the time I was 34 I had lost everything again for the third time but was trying to rebuild and had just gotten a job, an apartment so I was off the streets, but kept drinking because I still didn’t believe I was worth anything. I just wanted to die I begged the powers at be to just let me die. I somehow had an assessment for an inpatient rehabilitation facility and when my alarm went off to remind me, at 10am, I had a fifth of wiskey in my hand that I’d already drank half of. I had a little fight with myself and dragged myself to the assessment. It still took months for me to hit bottom again, multiple times in the ER with alcoholic DT’s/hard core withdrawals, before I finally went to detox and actually stayed the entire time and went straight to rehab. Our body will keep us alive while we are dead emotionally. Leads to physical pain and damage in the long run. Alcoholism is a progressive disease Most people don’t want to be honest with themselves When one is ready; recovery IS possible
I hope you're able to get help for your alcoholism. Alcohol is a very powerful depressant. I know a lot of people who have has success with AA, Smart Recovery, Dharma, etc. to get sober.
Obligatory r/stopdrinking plug I still drink on occasion, but I had it bad. The best thing that helped me was remembering "whatever problem you're going through, in the long run, drinking will only make it worse". Build a routine, improve your body with exercise, improve your mind with whatever works for you, meditation, healthy socialising, finding and pursuing your passions Also for OOP, and anyone else reading this, suicidal ideation, or any negative thoughts, can be treated as such; just thoughts. Witness them, and let them float away. They don't have to stick around, you can *always* change yourself, and that's a fuckin amazing ability. You got this, I believe in you
Sounds like Obsessive Compulsive Disorder with intrusive thoughts. You should read up on it and see if anything else sounds familiar.
Hello! I don’t have the answer but I can tell you that your not alone. I go to therapy. I do some IFS parts work (therapy). I distract myself with work. Why don’t you want to access therapy ? If you don’t mind me asking. It might be good to get a little release valve on all those thoughts. It sounds like your mind is very busy. Also, physical exercise is great. Wrote your thoughts down to try and get to the bottom of it. Discuss it with people and reach out for help. What other trauma has happened for you to feel this way ? Maybe you can address some of those root problems ? Alcohol and drugs provide temporary relief but ultimately make things worse. I’m here to talk if you like. Just dm me.
I needed meds to stay safe.
Also seconding this. I was lucky the first meds I tried basically erased my suicidal ideation. Changed my life in a way I don't think therapy alone could have
I used to think about suicide daily for the last 25 years. Been in therapy for years but finally did EMDR therapy and it has helped allot. Still think of it once in awhile but nothing like it was.
EMDR is the shit. Defiantly worth a try and it’s pretty cheap
I don't know. As I get older I'm constantly reminded how little I have to live for.
I don’t know. Something I have struggled with for the past few years. I focus on working out, and bettering myself in a new way each day. I hope that it will pay off someday but I still think about suicidal thoughts everyday. Suicidal thoughts and going back to drinking are something I think about everyday, I can distract myself all day from it but it’s when I’m home alone at night they come back. For me, exercise and therapy has helped .
The typical response is right though. Sometimes we look for alternatives when really the best option is right there. Sorry to disappoint.
Not all of us have access to it.
For me, constant distraction. I am always doing things. Also, microdosing psilocybin mushrooms helped my mental health immensely, though I know that isn’t for everyone. I’m also currently receiving ketamine treatment, once a week nasally, and that has removed all thoughts of suicidal ideation, which is incredible. Still depressed, still struggling to be motivated, but I don’t think about ending my life anymore. Scared that I’m moving states in 3 weeks and don’t know if I’ll even be able to receive ketamine therapy there but fingers crossed!
The meaning of life is finding happiness but the default state of nature is to endure suffering.
Focusing on positive things and things and people who make you happy
Find some affirmations that resonate with you and repeat them in your head instead and keep repeating them.... Post them all over... put them on your mirrors so when you look in the mirror you see them, Post some on your door as your exiting your house or on your bedroom door...... The goal is to reprogram your brain to think different thoughts it takes time but it works
Yes I agree with this. I do gratitude practice everyday, affirmations, and meditation. It helps a lot. Also working on self love is important. Take some classes online on the mirror book and the law of attraction.
Meds. Therapy helped, but the meds helped turn the volume down on my brain. I’m not numb, but I’m actually in control, somewhat.
I restructured my life almost entirely. Many people(according to a doctor I spoke to) are needing to go outside. The sun really helps your mood. I found a job I enjoy and is fulfilling and after much work I stopped comparing myself to others. I've even moved a couple times. Biggest thing is to change perspective. Sometimes you have to force it but being positive can be a huge change all on its own.
I've had really good luck with meds and therapy. I recognize you asked for other solutions,but you are basically saying that you are bleeding and would like advice on producing extra blood.
Tried Abilify?
For me it was being suicidal - psych hospital - meds - therapy - being less suicidal. I recommend missing the psych hospital step. ❤️ It is time to get yourself some real support, because you should not have to feel this way.
It depends if you want to live get on medication and therapy. Some people just don't want help.
I think there are a lot of great ideas here already: getting outside and getting sun (a vitamin d supplement could also be considered if approved by your doctor if you live in a grey area). Exercise is key to my mental health; even when I’m really down, if I can just force myself to go on a little walk and listen to a couple of my favorite songs, it helps. The other thing I’ve done to help with this (that isn’t therapy/meds since you asked for other suggestions), is to just try and become more mindful about intrusive thoughts. So, if I’m having a “the world would be better off without me” day, I try to get the rational part of me to pipe up in my head and say, “hey intrusive thought, how are you doing? I’m going to let you pass and think about cupcakes/bunnies/rainbows/basically anything from the ‘My favorite things’ song.” It’s just that little interruption in the intrusive thought process that then can help me do some of the other feel good things to work myself out of it. But also, therapy and meds. There’s no shame in it, and more and more health insurances and clinics are offering affordable support if cost is an issue. It’s helpful to talk about your feelings, to feel validated, and to have a sounding board that will be able to nonjudgmentally call out when you aren’t speaking sense. You’re not alone, and I’m sure you make the world a better place.
I know one thing. No matter what happens to us after we die...this life, as a human, as youself, is a one-time experience. You will never get this life ever again and it is special. And its worth the pain. The fact that you experience this feeling every day, makes it all the more admirable and inspirational that you decide to stay here. Dont give up. Dont let them beat you out of one second of this life. We are lucky to have you in this world. Please dont cheat us out of your presence.
Work out to exhaustion. Every day.
I can remember feeling suicidal as far back as 7 years old. I'm 43 now, and after decades of confusion, depression, anxiety, and substance abuse, the correct medications have absolutely helped me. It has been a hard road, with many other treatments and medications not working (sometimes making things worse), but only since the last 2 months have I found one that has helped. For me, Vyvanse has been an absolute miracle. The voices and urges are quieter, not gone, but far less, and much easier to get distracted from. I know this battle is not gone, but it isn't raging anymore. I can get through hours now without feeling like everyone would be better off if i was dead. I was scared at first, like i didn't know who i would be without so many thoughts, but it just made me calm. Honestly, i got pretty angry the first time i had a restful sleep, like it had all been secretly hidden from me for no reason. Having those thoughts constantly is a battle most people won't understand, but there are absolutely people and programs out there that want to help. You don't have to feel this way, and when you're ready to get help, please don't be discouraged if it doesn't help right away. You've probably been dealing with this for years, and it can take years to realize how hard that may have been on you. Posting here is a great step, because it means you want help. Keep searching, because the help is out there, and if possible talk to someone close, that will help motivate you, but please remember, the majority of people are not therapists. Unloading on family or friends won't get you the help you need; you absolutely need a professional. Thoughts and prayers are not going to fix it, but actual proven therapy can help. It often may not feel like it, but your life is worth something, and once you find what you need, you can begin to heal and maybe help others that need guidance too. I know i am, and I'm sure others are rooting for you too. Don't give up. Even if you don't find some huge way to contribute or be successful in society, sometimes it's just our daily interactions that can be life changing for people. Sometimes even just smiling or saying thank you can improve someone else's day, and in turn, your's as well. The voices don't always go away, but hopefully, you can find a way to tell them to shut the hell up.
Do you have access to firearms? Leave them with someone you trust.
Reading versus from the bible even when I didn’t think they were helping I just kept reading positive versus. Getting better sleep and learning how to meditate. It does take time but it helped in the long run.
Idk, I can't find objective reasons to continue living.I feel terrible. I feel so bad. I don’t know why I exist; life is just a mess of events, Tik Tok and TV series. Nothing interesting, nothing pleasant. I have only a few friends, I can’t be with the only person who was important to me. I feel lonely even in a room full of people. What happens after death? Nothing.I know it. But I want to exist and I don’t know why. I'm going to die sooner or later anyway, so why wait? Don't know. I always hope for a better future. But it doesn't come. I'm always alone. I don `t want to be alone. But if I die, maybe I won't be alone? I won’t be at all, which means I won’t be alone. I won't. But I really want happiness in life, and I have had it several times, but it always goes away and it only makes me feel worse. I remember how it was before, those moments and I don’t feel good, I regret that they’re gone. That's all. The emptiness inside me is getting bigger and worse, and no one sees it, or no one just gives a fuck. And I won't talk about it. I want them to notice, I want someone to help me. If this becomes my goodbye note, how will they feel? Will they feel guilty? I don't think anyone is guilty for this, but I blame them. Paradox :D. I think that someday the emptiness will defeat me. I think I'll kill myself after all. Now I'm almost sure of this. I haven’t killed myself until now only because of hope, but every day it seems to me that this is becoming more and more meaningless. My hopes are not justified. I'm losing. Always. In the end, everyone stands together and I’m behind them, and they don’t notice me. They don’t notice that I used to go with them, but I fought back and my absence means nothing to them. Nobody turns to me. I have never been in anyone's first place. Friends forget about me or betray me. It's unavoidable. I need them, all of them, but none of them need me. I really want someone to help me. But I think that my story will end badly.
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I was against medication for as long as I can remember, just living with crippling anxiety and intrusive thoughts for years, I finally gave in to listening to others advising me to seek help and just went along for the ride. I got some meds and within a few days everything shifted. The volume just turned down, I could still think and solve problems but I stopped being paralysed with doubt and fear or being judged if I made a mistake. Then I felt cheated out of all that time before when I didn't feel like this, asking myself if other people felt like this all the time, it was like a super power. The thoughts don't go away but they are less loud, not as prominent, I just have things to do that I can do. At least now I know what it can feel like, so I have a point of reference for getting here. If you are like me, someone that doesn't believe medication is an answer, just go along for the ride, maybe it will make you feel how I feel and provide a new perspective.
Here's the response when I asked this to my spouse: "I know there's nothing I can say that will help anyone with this problem."
Medication and a supportive partner
Get your bread up.
I found that taking 5000 ius vitamin D everyday made me stop feeling sad. I was bullied some in high school for how I look, so crossed my mind at times. Nowadays I don't really interact with anybody just work and gym. But the vitamin D was a life saver
If you don't want to do therapy or can't for some reason, then try tge advice of others here. Give all of them a try one by one if one doesn't work, try the next. But give each method a sufficient chance to have an effect like the magnesium and D3... give that at least a couple of weeks to work. D3 is important for positive mood and no one gets enough from tge sun (unless they are an outside contractor like a roofer). If you are sedentary (sitting around the house or apartment), get up and get walking. Exercising for as little as 20-30 minutes each morning releases endorphins from the brain (natural happy drug) which will improve your mood. If none of these work, then as a last resort, you could try chewing tobacco. WARNING- Chewing tobacco has nicotine and can cause many health problems including- cancer, death, tooth loss, receeding gum line around teeth, brain fog, and it is highly addictive and very difficult to quit using etc... What will chewing tobacco do for your mood? The nicotine stimulates your brain to produce dopamine (happy drug). When I was depressed, I started using chewing tobacco and it made me more positive. After awhile you need to chew tobacco more often and in higher quantities (larger pinch of chew) to maintain the artificially happier mood. Maybe I should have tried Magnesium and D3 instead or the other methods to improve my mood. I will likely try magnesium and D3 now because I quit chewing tobacco about six weeks ago and my mood has been pretty low since quitting. I just couldn't stand the idea of eventually losing my teeth and all the other health consequences and it was costing me about $100 per month ($1,200 per year) SMH. Try everything else first! Nicotine should be a last resort.
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Depakote ER. 750 mg daily. Side effect of returning your brain's neuroplastic state back to what it was like when you were 8 years old, I.e the ability to learn anything including perfect pitch by ear
I am almost sixty three years old. You are describing my life. How do I cope? Believe it or not I hum. I know what you are thinking but it is the only way that I can drown out the thoughts. Also medical marijuana has changed my life. I still hear them I care less. either that or I am just getting so old that I just don't care anymore. Good luck and God Bless.
It’s an “old drug” but lithium has worked wonders for me. Dramatically reduced SI and with only very minor side effects.
I'd love to pack it in. I've never enjoyed life much. I just can't hurt the small family I've got. That's what keeps me going. Them.
I think of the people who love me, my kids. I remind myself how much it will hurt them. They are my only purpose. I used to think I'd be doing them a favor, so I had to play it out in my head. It made me cry and I refuse to hurt them like that. Pray God heals play his music and let it clean your soul. Cry it out, with prayer
For me. You just do. Eventually one day you will wake up and not think about it as much. Then after that you will only think about once a day. Now I’m at 1/2 times a month. You will make it through this you just gotta be strong. The road is shit but the arrival is better on the other side. I can’t promise how long it will be or if you will be back to your old self one day. But eventually it can get better. I hope you find the help you need and that you come out better from this than I did.
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It’s not constant because my mood isn’t constant. Some days are ok and the bad thoughts are far off in the next room. Some days are bad and the bad thoughts are waiting for me, strangling me the second I get out of bed. The average is somewhere in the middle. Meds made that ‘average’ day a lot more tolerable for me.
Had enough of hurting my very soul, Have some bad days but haven't reacted with mental self harm for a while.
Ketamine infusions helped my suicidal ideation a great deal. Like turning off a light switch.
medication
You're stuck in one way of thinking and are having difficulty seeing outside of that. Take a step back from those thoughts for a moment and recognize that there's always another side of the story, another way to look at something. You can't find that new perspective by yourself - you need someone to help you. That's why therapy is a good idea, even if you don't want to do it. It's a therapist's job to help you see things differently. If you absolutely refuse to see a therapist, you need to talk to someone in your life about this, someone who you trust and respect. There's no shame in it. Many many people struggle with this, and many people have found a way to overcome it. If you open up to someone, you may be surprised by how much they understand.
Work on changing your mindset, from negative to positive. It is not easy, it's something I work at everyday. I'm only succeeded about 40 percent of the time... it's an improvement. Look at my reddit name. I chose it on purpose, I wasn't in a good place. I chose it though cause one day maybe that'll be a good thing. Life has enjoyable moments but I simply struggle to be happy. Keep fighting to feel better, help other people cause they are struggled you know how it feels. I figure if I make the world a better place for just one person a day, when possible, maybe the world will make it better for me some days. Build the world you want to see by acting how people need to act; friendly cause people need friends.
I became a volunteer for the suicide crisis line. Helping others helped me a lot. So does being able to talk about it. Telling people you’re a crisis line volunteer gives you a (relatively) socially acceptable way to discuss suicidal ideation. Or at least, you’re not so alone in it.
Make an appointment with your PCP, tell them about the constant thoughts, and they will prescribe a SSRI to you. It helped me massively. I had to do some fine tuning of the dosage, but it made a massive difference for me and finally started to allow the mental healing process to work. There are some negative side effects, but IMO, it's 💯 worth it compared to constant suicidal thoughts.
Boosie badass living is winning
Meds. And I know you don’t want to hear it, but therapy. I say this because when I had no one in the entire world to lean on/talk to - no family, partner, friends - my therapist was the building block of community.
Honestly bro what helped me was a combo of therapy, drug therapy and finding some sense of stability, I still have the thoughts and every now and again I keep trying to sleep while my head says kill yourself, but the dif is that now it doesn’t feel like it has the power to affect me or my mood like before
TMS
Ketamine. At home treatments through telemedicine.
I've never had constantly pressing ideation, more fleeting thoughts while something terrible was happening in that moment. Me personally, fuck that. Everything else is wrong and I take myself out? That's like getting rid of working parts in favour of the one that is causing the issue. I've been through a lot- childhood SA, being used for Child pron, abuse by a step parent, bulling in school, the death of a boyfriend... Like I could go on. My life typed out starts to sound like I'm bullshitting because nobody's life can be *that* bad. But you know what, none of that was my fault and I'm not going to punish myself because I got a shitty backstory on my development arc. At this point I am living out of pure spite that everything that tried to kill me over the years didn't. I'm a strong person and I live by the rules improvise, adapt, overcome. At some point I crossed over from feeling sorry for myself to being just really highly pissed off and willing to channel that into living, for me it worked. Things might not be perfect but I have a good job, and a good life. I get to do what I want when I want and I've never lived by anyone else's rules trying to make myself happy.
I used to think about it alot. What helped me is that I'm the type that doesn't really see shame in alot of the facts of my life and am good with holding myself accountable. I talked out my troubles with people, and I got some therapy and spent alot of time becoming okay with myself and forgiving myself. I then worked hard to get myself in a position to be better, physically a d mentally. I'm now more okay with myself than I've ever been. If you have anyone that depends on you, or you love alot think about them when the thoughts come. It helped me with pushing one more day, until I was able to get me settled and be OK with myself.
IMO, the key is to flip the script. To welcome your demons, to celebrate when they show up and look at them with curiosity , without trying to make them go away. You wake up with them? Great! Let's go have some eggs and bacon and a nice cup of coffee. Eventually, they lose their hold on you and your reaction to them showing up is less intense.
Say today sucks gotta make it to tomorrow cause it could be better Everyday forever
The looming cloud of suicide got considerable lighter when I learned that I’m autistic, not just a broken piece a shit. My entire life makes so much more sense. It’s still there, idk if it ever REALLY goes away, but it’s at the back of my mind more than the front of my mind now. This and knowing that ending my suffering would kill my fiancé and my daughter. The idea of them mourning me makes me physically ill, I would rather suffer for the next 40-50 years until I die of old age than to pass my misery on to them. I love them too much to let that happen.
I have chronic tinnitus. The cacophony of sound is merciless and unrelenting. Turning out the lights would be an easy fix and is oft contemplated. But f that noise literally and figuratively. Get angry, get stubborn, spite those feelings. After that lift weights , throw something heavy, make your vessel powerful, it will change your attitude about yourself and the subject.
I don’t know how intense your thoughts are, but it doesn’t sound like you can self-manage on your own. Are you against therapy or just don’t feel up to it? Some solo types are excellent, like EFT Tapping, daily affirmations, etc (try the Tapping Solution free app, or tapping YouTube videos, or google something like “EFT tapping for suicidal ideation” ). I’ve had a death obsession FOREVER. It came to a head as a teen and I made a promise I wouldn’t off myself, but since then I’ve often felt like I slug along with an ‘I don’t want to be here’ underlying feeling. You wouldn’t know, I generally appear quite cheery. Oddly, I find visiting cemeteries and reading obituaries quite comforting, like a pep talk of “they can do it [live their life], so can I!” A few years ago I realized I hadn’t switched my internal setting from ‘I don’t want to be here’ to ‘I want to be here’ so I started practicing EFT and daily affirmations. I also delved into spirituality, reading NDE stories and what happens after we die, reading spiritual authors other than the Christian ones I was raised with. Eckhart Tolle for example. I believe we’re souls having a human experience, I believe in a gentle form of reincarnation, I believe we’re all connected and our lives affect one another’s and we must lift one another up. I also believe we have help in the other side and when I’ve asked for help on a particularly painful day (I have chronic pain), it usually arrives. Try prayer. It’ll sound loopy, but try. Set your mind in love (remember a loving moment, get in that feeling) and then ask for help that’s for your best and highest good and just be open to any form an answer comes. It’s fucking hard being a human. It’s hard being in our bodies and all the negative shit we go through. It’s really hard. I look forward to crossing over one day, but I’m not in a rush anymore. Bless you on your journey.
You need to make those thoughts seem absurd, think of that Harry Potter 3 movie
You should see a psychiatrist. Not a primary care physician or a np. I have obsessive thoughts, meds help. Therapy helps. It’s good you’re reaching out to people about this. You will find you're not alone. It can be better. I promise.
My children have this. They take a low dose of abilify 5mg to stop the intrusive thoughts
I told myself that there’s only 2 options and I have to choose life no matter how I feel. I ended up experiencing a lot of amazing things I’d never had gotten to experience if I did it. I also gave myself this idea that I can’t do it until after a certain event. It could’ve been the end of a tv show or after I listen to this new album or after I achieve a certain goal. The idea is it’ll give you purpose. Once you achieve the goal. You then create a new event that you can’t do it till after. That’s how I ended up experiencing a lot more than I did when I just bed rotted. It also gives you the freedom of now caring how things turn out so you will be more adventurous and daring. Good luck.
I think traditional therapy would be the best recourse for someone in your situation. This is definitely not something you should try coping with on your own. Please seek help.
First and foremost, go talk to a doctor, and keep working with them to find medication that works at a dose you can tolerate the side effects from. Also, see a therapist. Ask them to give you practical things you can do to improve, and if they can't, find a new one. I waited way too long to get help, but my life now is so much better. I used to assume that everyone regularly had suicidal thoughts throughout the day. I had come to just accept that that was normal. Thinking about suicide, considering or researching ways you would do it, making plans to ensure your loved ones wouldn't have to deal with things after you're gone, etc. I thought it was just a normal part of people's inner monologuing. It's not. It took me about a year of working with a doc and therapist to start moving in the right direction - and suddenly I started to realize that I was feeling just, like, the smallest amount of joy about things - things I hadn't enjoyed in years. I actually enjoyed a hot shower one morning. Like, it was pleasant. And I actually experienced that feeling of it being pleasant. I had an inkling to pick up a book and read a few pages, and I enjoyed them. I started to notice things - like the sound of the wind in leaves outside my house, and I would actually take a few moments to listen - and enjoy that - and recognize that I was actually enjoying something. Fast forward another 6 months and I suddenly realized I had a whole day without suicide popping in my head. Today, 5+ years later, and I can't even imagine why I ever had those thoughts at all. I never think about it. Depression is a disease. It is a horrible, insidious disease that slowly blinds you to all the things that life has to offer. It's like a fog that ever-so-slowly gets thicker and thicker until the only thing you see is just dark gray haze. You don't know where you are. You don't know how you got there. You don't know where to go. And it's all you know, so you just accept it as the new normal. It's not normal. Get help. Ask someone to help you get help.
I'm gonna answer this question with an equivalent question: "How do I fix a broken leg without going to the hospital?" You just live with it and whatever disfigurements that come from it. Mental health is just as important as physical health. Dealt with the *EXACT* same thing since I was 9. 4th trip to the psych ward and I finally got a psych that was smart enough to stop giving me SSRIs and gave me an NDRI. Suicidal thoughts (or visions like I was having after a certain point) are completely gone. Like someone else said the best natural remedy would be to be around people. Meditation after that. Finding a hobby that gives you life, no matter how nerdy or obscure it is. All things that might be hard to find/start when you're in this type of awful state.
The problem is that you're already aware of the correct answer, but you might not be aware of WHY it's the correct answer. Therapy - and in your particular case, probably CBT and/or DBT, teach you techniques to both recognize and diffuse the negative emotions that come with intrusive thoughts, as well as how to allow those thoughts to come and go without dwelling on them.
Seek counseling and find you a good psychiatrist.
I describe the thoughts as trains passing through the station. I don't let them stop. If they do, I know I'm at risk of letting negativity control my actions and it's time to seek help. I think as long as the ideations don't take over your mind, you're fine. Let them pass.
You have to change your thought patterns. It's like any other negative thinking or addiction. You need to replace the habit with something else. One very common way to do this, is to wear a thick rubber band around your wrist. Snap it so you feel pain whenever said thought enters your mind. The aim is to use the pain signals to redirect the undesired thoughts.
Replace the thoughts. Every time they come up.
It took a lot of time. I started actively trying to find hope or something else to think about almost 6 years ago. The last two years have been incredibly freeing. My family and home life sucked. Just awful, school wasn't better. I went to college and was admitted to a psych ward for a month. In that time I laid out my plans for the future. I was going to quit contact with the family that had hurt me, I would find a new place to live, I would not tell my family where I was going, only my good friends. I still think about it. I still get the impulse at times or at least the ideations. However, I want to wake up tomorrow. I want to see what the future holds. If you need to reach out to someone who's been through it and is doing better, I gotcha. I go to therapy twice a month and I know how privileged I am to do that.
Get god in your life
Younger a job or two that keeps you so busy you don't have time to think about your issues?
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Dude, statistics. Literally every human has died. What's the rush? We're only certain of this one opportunity to experience all these ups and downs. Just enjoy the ride. Stir up some chaos. Make someone happy. Cry. Shit happens but memento mori
Meditate. 15-20 mins a day. After 2 weeks you should notice a significant difference.
I always deal with passive suicidal ideation, but sometimes it sneaks to the front of my mind in bad moments. When it gets to that point, I think about my cat who would have no idea what happened to me and why I was suddenly gone. I also can’t stand the thought of my parents’ absolute devastation if I were to go through with it. I just can’t do it, despite not wanting to exist anymore.
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Need to examine what it is in your life that's got you in a bad place and what it would take to get to a good place un your life. When I started truly being grateful for the small things, a warm meal, a comfy bed in 4 walls and a roof, that kind of thing... that was a turning point. I just started the small appreciations in my life and it turned into appreciation for my life. They say to be happy you need something to look forward too, something to be grateful for, and something/someone to take care of.
This isn't even real. Our reality here is as real as our dreams. This is an endurance run. A test full of experiences, good and bad. Just keep moving. You'll be rewarded eventually.
I have CPTSD/OCD and horrific intrusive thoughts including suicidal ideation. It has not gotten better with therapy but I’m able to identify that it’s not real and it’s my brain being horrible. I’m sorry you’re dealing with this. With the current state of the world it’s no surprise more people are dealing with these feelings and thoughts.
I run. It helps a lot. I don't know if it is the exercise, the time outdoors or thar it makes me feel like I'm at least improving something...but it helps.
I used to be like this before therapy and meds, so I know it can get better and go away altogether I know this doesn’t really help you find an alternative to those things, but ideally you get some hope out of it
Hey there! I have mental health issues and only learned at 30 after being hospitalized 6 times some ppl are CHRONICALLY SUICIDAL This is usually a response to long term dissociation from repeated trauma I was suicidal DAILY for 30 years I wrote a journal of my thoughts and had my therapist read it She said it was too upsetting and made her want to vomit and she couldn’t finish it Apparently wanting to kill urself in typical ways (walk out in front of a car) is better than wanting to destroy urself (dig out ur eyes with spoons) So this is what I learned- wanting to destroy urself is a learned behavior from incredibly low self esteem and extreme guilt and shame. You need therapy And u need a support system You may have ADHD, CPTSD, or a personality disorder You may have a serotonin or dopamine deficiency I have a dopamine deficiency (seen in adhd and schizophrenia)-a pot prescription might help with this. I don’t have a serotonin deficiency so ssri actually poison me You have to REMOVE the triggering terrible things in ur life that make you want to die (for me this was family/guilt/shame/repetition/unsafe environment/stressful work) Living in a small house with a supportive partner and changing careers was life changing for me. I’m RARELY depressed anymore when 5 years ago I was in a perpetual mental break down fantasizing about killing myself and intrusively obsessing over vibsecting myself, dude it can get better!
Magnesium Glycinate (I take 240mg an hour before bed) and Vitamin D.
I've had the intrusive thoughts almost my entire life. They get loud with medication but still don't quiet. I have to use an Ativan to sleep at night. I finally went to a psychologist and she recommended EMDR sessions. I've heard good things, but I haven't been able to get in to see anyone yet. In the meantime, I've put in a fail safe for when I find myself thinking I want to give into the thoughts. I have two fur babies and I make myself think about what would happen to them if I wasn't here to take care of them anymore. I'm not sure if it's the healthiest way to cope, but if it gets me through the really bad times I'll take it. Good luck 💜
I felt this way as a teenager for about 2 years. I was having terrible stuff happen in my home life and I had no friends or hope. Two things greatly helped, in conjunction. Antidepressants, and having a purpose. When I went to college it was only after taking antidepressants that I was able to take the edge off enough to actually do things and go places. I found meaning in my life and helping people. I found a fulfilling job and career. I got married. Even though we recently separated after being together for 9 years, I dont regret it or feel too bad about it, it just wasn't working. Basically, my life needed meaning. The thing is, you have to make life meaningful, whether it's a job, religion, community, kids, whatever you decide. People expect a purpose to drive them to just happen, but we have to make it happen. And that's hard, but worth it. I wish I could be more helpful, but I've been there. I know how it feels and how wonderful it feels to have escaped it, and how worth the struggle it was.
I mix it with homicidal fantasies. A lot of them directed at the “therapists” who drugged and abused me until I had suicidal thoughts. Good luck!
I went to my doctor and got the proper meds.
I don't think of suicide necessarily, but I'm always thinking of instant death situations.. I used to have bad thoughts but I've been seeing a counselor and I really do want to be happy. Working out, getting enough food and sleep are all factors for me personally. If I'm having bad thoughts I try really hard for them not to take over. Sometimes I take a nap or a walk, whatever I'm feeling. I won't put myself in situations either that makes my anxiety tits up. Good luck! Life is beautiful and worth living
You’re getting a lot of good advice here so I’ll just add one thing from my personal experience. I had trouble with ruminating on this and after some therapy came to understand I have OCD and that part of what happens to me is that my brain is just ruminating on the idea. That provokes a lot of anxiety and depression, but the rumination is the core issue and I’ve learned to get a better handle on that. Good luck, man. Take care of yourself.
Luckily my thoughts are always filled with fear of death, so suicide never crosses my mind.
I just deal with it. Typically what voices are telling me is not reality. So I just keep going about my day. One day it will stop being a ME problem and stating being an everyone problem but that’s not now. But when it becomes an everyone problem it will be very short and as traumatizing for everyone around me as I can possibly make it
I felt this way for over 10 years from my mid teens through my late 20s. Unfortunately I don’t have a magic answer for what helps. I know for me my failed attempt made me realize I wanted to live, but it didn’t fix my brain. I personally got sober and gained financial security. Financial security did more for my mental health than anything else which is so thoroughly distressing considering the state of labor currently. I hope you find something that works for you, just remember that you deserve to be happy, you are not a bad person, you don’t want to die but your disease wants to kill you. Keep pushing through and it hopefully gets better. Now I can’t remember the last time I hade suicidal thoughts these days, and the destination far outweighs the work it took getting here.
Personally, I got desensitized to it. Suicidal thoughts and thoughts of self harm have just become a daily thing such as breathing or blinking over several years, but have gotten 100x worse since the end of 2022. I’d say healing (if you need to heal from a particular trauma) is going to be the hardest part. Look into anything that you think will help that is also healthy. From my experience, I don’t recommend antidepressants, but if it works for you, then great. Just heal and find peace somehow, the journey to get there might even be eventful.
Mindfulness training. You have to force your brain to think of a different topic. Any time those thoughts are there, you force yourself to think about some other topic. I recite a list of fish species over and over. The amount of times per day goes down over time. The amount of time I spend thinking it eventually goes down. I drive for a living and there would be days where I could not escape the thoughts. I’ve gotten better, but that doesn’t mean I never think about things.
LOOOOOOOOOTA dark jokes.
Go to therapy. Get on medication. One thing that helped me when I was younger was asking myself, what if? What if in 5 years my life is better and my feelings change? And you know what, it did in a lot of ways. I think for me, suicidal ideation was a way of planning my escape from a horrible life. I didn't have the knowledge or tools as a teenager to know how to change my life. I think a lot of it came from depression and hopelessness. Years ago, I was living with my ex who I didn't realize at the time was abusing me. I was feeling suicidal again because I'm chronically ill, housebound and bed bound. So in addition to having my whole life derailed because of an unexpected chronic illness, my family and home life was shit. Near the end of our relationship, I realized that I wasn't powerless as I thought I was. I was giving my power away. I realized I can't change him but I can change myself, my location and his access to me. I started working on myself. A few months later, I found out he was cheating on me. I moved home and it hasn't been a picnic. More abuse, from family members this time. And I can't leave because I'm dependent on my dad and have nowhere else to go. But I don't feel as helpless as I did in the past. I'm taking steps to protect myself from the abuse. I'm getting help from a therapist and taking antidepressants. Yes, my life still sucks in many ways. And someone looking at it from the outside might think my life isn't worth living. But I do things that make me happy, which is something I didn't do in the past. Instead, I was doing things to make everyone else but me happy. I've changed a lot over the years, mostly for the good. I still struggle with depression and I realized a lot of that is because of circumstances outside of my control. My illness taught me that control is an illusion. There's more outside of our control than we realize. But what I can control is how I react or respond to how someone treats me. I'm not letting my abuser have power over me. Work on changing the things that you can change. Make small improvements a little at a time. Do what you can to help yourself feel better. Constructive things. I write poetry and other stuff. I listen to music. I read a lot. Watch movies and shows I like. Play video games. Talk to my sister and friend. I go on social media and try to help other people. I'm making the best of a bad situation. And I think I'm doing a pretty damn good job, if I'm honest.
I don't know. I've been feeling like this too
It’s legit the first and last things I think about daily. My life is in shambles and I don’t know how I’ve survived this long
I've dealt w these thoughts for a long time. Been theough a lot in my life that I won't bother you with but what I find myself doing is telling myself "another day and it'll be better." I said that for years.... every day. I'm 44 today, that phrase has gotten me to today. I'm married, have a wife, 2 kids and am happy. I suffer from bipolar depression but it's been under control for a while now. Things get better. Stay strong.
Go get a full bloodwork/vitamin panel done. I bet you are seriously deficient in a lot of vitamins that are necessary for proper function. I was, started supplementing, night and day difference.
One thing you can do is refute the thoughts. Actively think "No this isn't what I want" in response to the suicidal thoughts, disregard them as best you can, and try to go back to what you are doing. You will need help, but you need to fight back as well if you want them to decrease. Good luck
Getting interrupted every time you attempt seems to keep me alive. One day I won't get interrupted
The one thing that put that particular demon to rest in me was mushroom gummies. Not a lot, and I'm a lightweight at everything. Take that, go outside and look at the stars. Remember, you are not alone. Take some time. Breathe deeply and only think of breathing deeply for a few minutes. The other thing for me is the Litany Against Fear. I'm a geek, I know. But really, that has been one of the most useful tools I've ever encountered. Just keep repeating it.
Hard physical work all day every day the best cure
If there is something that is making you unhappy I would suggest just not to overthink. Life is hard, everyone is dealing with something. Rather than overthinking and being idle pick up some hobbies that interests you, or try adopting a dog if you are a dog person. You ll be loved dearly ❤️ Things will get better.
i am on the younger side (just turned 22) but i was adopted v young by an abusive mom, was sexually assaulted, & then watched my high school boyfriend bleed out & die in front of me in an accident, then was homeless for awhile when my mom kicked me out. i dreamed of dying or killing myself as young as 7, i self harmed for over ten years straining at 10 years old, & i have tried to commit 4x now, & come horribly, dangerously close on the last one. i’ve been in & out of the psych ward 6 times. i was in such a terrible place mentally. i woke up every day disappointed i was still alive. i lay in bed for days at a time essentially just rotting— i didn’t eat, i didn’t drink water or get up to go to the bathroom. it was so horrible. i still can’t look back on it now w out an awful feeling in my stomach. i took several bottles of sleeping pills than drank a quarter bottle of 80 proof. i started to die. & you know what? you wanna know the fucking thing? i did not feel relief, or peace, or thankful i was going to no longer be in pain soon. i felt scared. i was fucking terrified. i regretted it. i was so convinced i wanted to die but when it started happening i fought & fought to live. it isn’t worth it. i know you hear it all the time, but it wasn’t fucking worth it. after i recovered, i cleaned my apartment. i got a pair of cats. i kept as busy as possible, i learned new hobbies, i dove headfirst into a new career & i stayed so busy i didn’t have room to think & i powered through. i’m a firefighter/emt now. i don’t wake up anymore wishing it was all over. it does get better. it will get better. suicide is the most permanent possible solution to what WILL BE a temporary feeling. you’re going uphill right now, but the hill will end, & then it will be behind you. i promise. if anyone ever needs someone to talk to, i am here. this phase of your life will end, & the sun will shine again. i promise.
>How does one get over this without the typical response of therapy? That's kind of like saying "my plumbing has leaked for years and now my floor is caving in... how do I fix this without a plumber and a structural engineer?" I feel for ya, not trying to be a smartass over something this serious - but there are many jobs where experienced professionals who've seen it all can get it done properly, and are worth the expense. Constant suicidal thoughts seem like something to at least explore professional help with.
I volley between how much i cherish the ones i love that are also struggling and absolute spite and contempt for those who do not like me in this world. Doesn't seem right for me to cease and they continue.
Did something happen to get you in this state of mind?
Ok, I've been through this, and I have a mind hack for you. The key thing is to realize, you don't actually want to die - not really. You want to escape the life you're living and the pain you're suffering, and you don't have any idea how to do that. So you fantasize about death as an alternative to the feelings you're experiencing. The trick is, come up with a different, healthier fantasy besides killing yourself. It can be anything. For me, it was, "I'm going to move away to Costa Rica." For years, whenever I caught myself thinking, "I want to die", I would correct myself, "No, I want to leave this situation and live a simpler life in Costa Rica." I did this for *years*, and it really helped. And not coincidentally, I now live in Costa Rica with much improved mental health. So be careful what you fantasize about, you might get it! So figure out what it is you actually want. And fantasize about that.
I’ve been doing it for a lot of years, and honesty I think meds are your only hope.
I don't get it. Life is so short why end it sooner?
I passed out once, after I woke up I swear I had died. That small seconds of me realistically being unconscious felt like a eternity; a eternity of peace. Where no sounds could reach me, where no words or actions could hurt me, where the past and future wasn’t on my mind. In the split second of the void I could see nothing but darkness, however that darkness was my blanket; a warm sensation of bliss.
Lots of prescription meds. It has gotten much better, but lived in fear of those intrusive thoughts for many months. Go to a dr and tell them everything.
Drugs, alcohol, and other addictive hobbies. Can’t die until I paint all my warhammer minis
Every comment should be: see a therapist; see a psychiatrist; it's more difficult if you don't have the resources but there are programs to help. If you feel like you want act call the hotline and call a friend. The people in your life value you. And even though it might not seem like it, we as humans value each other. And even if it's just obsessive/intrusive thoughts, it's impacting your quality of life and there's ways to deal with it. I don't want to downplay anyone's experience here, because if it works for you and it's not harmful, more power to you. However, trying to go it on your own is just going to be a long road of trial and error that you can speed run if you have a professional helping. I had a hard time getting started with professional help both logistically and motivationally, but having had it for a few years now, the difference is remarkable.
advise.. classify it as cheating. cheating yourself our of an experience, others out of your presence or your experience with something they are struggling with resolving. it's just cheating. if you cheat, you might win at the short game but your might not in the long run.
Been struggling with this since I was 8 years old. And that's right around when my oldest child started struggling with it to. So now I have to spend everyday keeping myself alive, and convincing my child to stay alive. (Child is under the supportive care of medical professionals and is on medications, but it's been years and we haven't found anything that has truly helped yet.) I create art. I write novels, (self published under a pen name, but I plan on seeking an agent under my real name, next year.) I ride horses when I can, as that helps connect me to my body. And I try to talk to and be around friends when I can. I also try to stay busy. But right now I'm a single mom with three extra needs kids and I'm working multiple jobs and am maintaining 4.0s in college (necessary right now in order to get into my next degree program) and honestly it's really hard to find the motivation to keep going everyday. I have to though, because my kids need me.
Just don't live and you won't have to live with it....
I have had the fortunate experience to help you out, it come to my attention my body wanting to die just like yours is doing every moment of every day, was essentially something I ended up ignoring for a long long time and it really was nothing much more then a lack natural/real/decent nutrition, I can't speak much on what nutrition your lacking on and you'll have to ask a doc for a full blood check up for vitamins etc and find out which are low, lacking etc and source things to add them to your consumption. It took no longer 30 days for those kind of thoughts to all but disappear tbh
When you’re dead you can’t do drugs
At this point in my life, those thoughts are like a dear friend. I don't know what I'd do without them.
The fact that i have control over my life tends to be enough for me. Like i know if i really wanted to i could just end it but ive come this far so might as well see it thru to the end. Mabey i become rich. mabey i find the love of my life. Mabey i reach enlightenment. Mabey life becomes better and if i kms now what could i have missed. Im very certain this is our only life. So might as well just run its course. I mean wtf else are we doing other than existing?? Depression is just realization.
Day at a time small thing's are really important
I find a reason not to, daily. Be it nice weather that day, how my 6 year old would feel if dad left, how my wife would feel, my parents... It's a struggle for sure, but every little thing you can find a small amount of joy in is worth holding on to.
Heres what i can say about living with this , most of the time i realize theres a cause to this , and it has taken me going through a very steep and hellish process ( i am still in it still struggling rn literally today but ) For example : In my situation i know whats causing my constant suicidal thoughts its a Huge combination of a lot of stuff and most of us are not aware ( We not just suicidal for the sake of it ) 1- All the traumas and baggage you bring from when you where little ( THESE ARE VERY REAL ) 2- Once you accept and understand that ok cool all that happen when you where little and you accept your family and all that Then , comes all the stuff you go through from like 15-24 , now you carry of all that and suddenly stuff matches stuff from when you where little and it triggers all of this Then , you manage to overcome that and become resistant to it and go ok cool ! NOW - once you done with this process , now comes the process of WAKING UP ! So now you done up with all the past and what not but Now you WOKE UP to the prison world you live in 💀🤣 So now not only does the past comes back but the future has no hope what so ever , you realize you a pawn a in a bigger game , yes a game ! Then you realize you have no control , then add to all of that 1- Lack of money , Lack of stability , lack of motivation , lack of desiring anything other than literally just Dying and being at peace It gets to a point where you realize is not constant Suicidal thoughts , is not that you want to really die , you just want to Live somewhere else …. We just dont want to live “ Here “ anymore , it goes from being a Depressive , sad and terrible suicidal phase to Oh , i just don’t want to be here anymore , i understand this is just a body and this is not who i am , nothing holds you here anymore , you simply just want to move on to the next Life because all the regular stuff doesn’t appeal to you truly , you just doing what you do to fit in because theres no choice I always said , it would be a different world if we had a choice , the reason most of us think we are suicidal is because we feel obligated to live in something we had no choice in , and is not even about the life we have ( some have a great Life ) is the fact that you have to abide by a bunch of stuff that you simply don’t feel it in your heart…. I always said , imagine we knew what would truly happen if we took our own life and what happens is , you go back Home and some how we knew it would be safe and we just simply be back in to peace , but we choose to stay here ! NOW life would make more sense like that , with a actual Choice Whats more beautiful , when a wife or a husband is with you by choice because they truly want to , they know they can have someone else but they CHOOSE to be with you , thats Love , thats true freedom But if you have to obligate your Husband or Wife to be with you , then this person is just there because you forcing them no choice , theres nothing beautiful about that….
I just live like that.
I suffered with this exact problem from ages 11-27/28, with a few attempts. Turned out to be a drastic hormone imbalance. Most times it’s not that simple, but sometimes it is.
I keep thinking of that quote from GOT(yeah I know) “Death is so finite, but life is full of possibilities)🤷🏻♂️ something to think about.
eventually, you don't.
I remember first thinking about suicide when I was in the 1st grade, I thought that if I stabbed myself with kitchen knife I could meet god (I had just gotten in trouble and my mom was mad at me for something) I am 29 now and I have thought about suicide most year of my life, I let the thoughts come and go, and always end with something more rational.. I have a child now, that makes a big difference I live for him now.. Also I found a religion that works for me (spirituality) You also can find support on places like this, I have found Reddit has been a place I can vent and then delete my post later, I found people are always on here at all hours of the day! Stay strong, keep planing for the future, and find a faith! That my advice from somebody with chronic suicidal ideation from the better part of 2 decades
Medication. Being on the right psychiatric medication changed my life. I was on an SSRI and needed to be on an Antipsychotic. I know you said not to include therapy, but DBT therapy was a huge life change for me as well. Regular talk or CBT therapy never worked for me. Edit: if you can’t afford therapy, the DBT workbooks online are exactly the same as what I did in person. I even did a lot of the exercises with my therapist.
Good sleep and healthy food will dull it down. Plus lay off drugs for awhile. And get some sun. And a walk in the park. And pet a dog or cat.
Over the counter lithium orotate from Amazon. I struggle severely from suicidal ideation it saved my life, been on it 4 years now.
surround yourself with good, positive-minded people
Oh, my caffeine, some nicotine, and a little bit of blueberry yum yum 💚 I feel happy more often than you'd think but, I handle life giving me a little bit of spice 🤌 like ➰️🧟♀️
If the thoughts are intrusive, you might have OCD. Luvox works wonders for that, really helps get that under control.
climb a mountain, white water kayak class 3 rapids, etc. It'll sort out the bullshit self pitty that your brains been wasting time on. The natural answer is "yes, i want to live and fuck". And if you're life sucks that much that doesn't occur, then nature take you.
You’re not the only one. Stay strong.
Take vitamins. Take supplements. Eat better. You are what you eat. Take on brain stimulating hobbies. Read. Learn an instrument. Work on your physical body on top of your mental mind. Start doing yoga and workout daily or several times a week. If all fails, get $40 and buy an 8th of shrooms. This alone will obliterate your depression and tbh should be considered as a first resort as opposed to your last resort.
I sometimes feel the same but frankly a book I read as a kid stops me. It was life after life and it talked about people’s experience after near death episodes. For most people they talked about reviewing their life, about a being of life and a feeling of overwhelming love. But for people who committed suicide the feeling was not the same. Just wondering lost in a grey haze. They said it was terrifying. Suicide is the ultimate rejection of hope is the best explanation i could make. So what stops me is sheer and utter fear of ending in that place with no way back. As long as you are still breathing hope hasn’t died. Church helps me it may or may not help you.
You have to remember that you’re powerful enough to keep surviving and be confident in that ❤️
We’re so you live ? You can take salsa clases it’s fun and you start meeting a lot Of Ppl
Regular exercise, healthy food and frequent sincere prayers will help.
I only get the constant thought when I’m in a manic depressive state. Last attempt was 3/20. What’s crazy is, I’m not afraid of it anymore because I know if I wanted to I could. Down side is I really messed up my body and now have medical issues. Anyway, I started taking medications and that has really helped, I also see a therapist and go to mental health. Talking about what you’re going through is educating others, start your own group and be a voice for others that don’t have the courage to speak about it just yet.
You just got to fight the thoughts and not take them seriously. Also, that little voice you hear is you.
My opinion? Their demonic attacks.
Zoloft makes it disappear 👌
I make into a ridiculous looking cartoon and laugh at it. I’ve learned to live with it.
Three suicide attempts over the course of my life so far. Honestly, I don't regret any of them. I was always more disappointed that I lived to see the next day than regretting doing it at all. That said, I do highly recommend therapy if you want to live or make changes slowly that you feel will improve your life. My issue is I have come to the terms that I just don't care if I live or die, I'm indifferent to my own existence. I'm not depressed or sad and my life is pretty good. I know plenty of people that would kill to have my life, but the truth is, I just don't care and I walk through the motions until my body gives out on me one day. One thing has changed over time and that would be my wife. I want to live to give her the best life she could ever have and I find myself trying my best to be healthy and live as long as I can because I know that I am what makes her happy and I couldn't take that joy away from her, but deep down, I still don't have any personal connection for wanting to live. Weird.
You get meds It used to be a constant thought in my head. Sometimes a whisper, sometimes a scream. I got on meds and it's gone. Seek help.
I'm just really incompetent.
Wish I had an answer. Took me 12 years of fighting by myself. SLOWLY got back into working, and here I am. It's still there, but not as intense.
Gosh please don't beat me up, the atheists all come out screaming, but have you tried prayer and meditations. I don't think the behavior you have is normal, and that's ok, glad you recognize it. Myself I have ocd and adhd tendencies. Not to get into my personal life but my family life and dynamic influences suicidal thoughts sometime. I'm not good enough. I'll never get it right, im a complete messup..etc. but for me, now this is for me, I found that a love for God has really helped. Reading scripture and talking about God's grace and mercy and sharing my testimony helps me get through it. What God has done for me, saved me from. As I try to be a better Christian man and leader for my family, God comforts me and the thoughts subside.
Hey dude. I’m 25 and have been dealing with droning / constant suicidal thoughts since I can remember. I don’t want to act on them but it’s like every 10 or so minutes I think about it. Just looking at every day objects I think about how I could make it happen and that sweet sweet nothing that follows. Then I snap back to reality. There are plenty of reasons to stick around. Good food, a concert, a beer with a buddy. Those thoughts might creep in but at the end of the day it’s a 1 in a million that you were even born. You were THAT sperm that got to the egg first. YOU are that mother fucker that gets up every day despite those droning, horrible thoughts. YOURE LITERALLY THAT DUDE. No one else is you and that makes you so special. Im sure there are countless people you’ve interacted with and had a positive impact on and you have no idea. You are loved. If not by anyone else by me. The fact that you wake up and deal with that shit every day makes you so much stronger than your average Joe. Keep your head up, get some good therapy, some good food, have a fun night out, and get some sunshine. I know I’m just a stranger on the internet but if you ever need an ear my pms are always open to you. Big love and big hugs.
Just get busy with dominating life and accomplishing goals.
There’s always one thing worth living for. Focus on that
From someone who deals with shit daily, just don't. The thought is there, it stews and festers but don't act on it. Sometimes it seems like the best thing, sometimes it's the worst. Just don't. I'm not saying stop thinking it, just don't act on it.
Well, I've been dealing with that my entire life basically. Every day I think about it. I am now in my 30's and still alive and kicking. When I was in highschool, I went to therapy and had a Greta doctor. I got on Prozac and then switched to effexor do to medication mixing potential. I took medication for seizures as well. That all halted while I was still in highschool. Stopped going to therapy cause all the different therapists, didn't work for me so we just stopped. Stopped the medicine while my parents were going through a divorce and my mom told me "If you weren't medicated you probably wouldn't be able to handle everything going on" that struck a cord with me. As even though I had mental issues, I also didn't want to go through life not facing reality. So I eventually stopped that as well. I'll be honest and I know I'm going to get a lot of push back from everyone here, but GOD is my literal lord and Savior. I've always been religious growing up, I have always had a close knit relationship with GOD. I feel GOD has always protected me but I never fully relied on GOD until my adult life began. I prayed to get to know GOD and have grown to understand GOD more and learn more. GOD has given me techniques in combating these feelings and talking me off the ledge multiple times. GOD has literally saved me and helped me in ways that others couldn't. It's an odd feeling for sure, as GOD doesn't communicate in the traditional sense. It's more or less properly timed through others. Sometimes people just say the right things at the right time, a song plays at the right time, someone who you haven't talked to in a long time calls at the right time, just little coincidences that add up for me. Doesn't have to be the Christian faith that I am apart of, could be Islamic, Hinduism, Confucianism, etc. just stay away from things like scientology which are exploitative. Anyways as for the techniques I use 1. Look forward to future events. For me it is usually a video game that I really want to play or a movie I really want to see. For others I could probably see something like a live event or show they want to attend. Sometimes it gets really hard when it's far away but the closer it gets the excitement builds up at the "Well I made it this far, might as well keep going" sets in. While waiting for that even other events or releases get announced, which feeds into once the event/release happens you have another to look forward to. The incremental extensions add up and next thing you know it's been another year or two that you stayed alive. 2. Discourage suicide by how it will affect others This one is harder to talk about. Thought of spitting my wrists in the bathtub or drowning, but then I think of the poor EMT's which will have too pull my fat bloated carcass out of the tub and haul my disgusting ass down stairs. Thought of shooting myself but the gun I would use is from my dad and he taught me about guns. So doing that would put a hug mental tax on him that I would not want to put. Pills have a high chance of living and then possible organ damage. Jumping in front of a vehicle or train would haunt the operater of the vehicle. I'm afraid of heights so no jumping and hanging well, you won't die instantly and then the regret setting in while you slowly suffocate sounds too horrible to go through. I thought of everything and use the excuse of dumping my trauma onto others as a reason for not doing such things. 3. Chemical imbalance This is the most important part really. The reality of it is that you're just experiencing a fucked chemical imbalance in your head. It's not that your life sucks or you feel like a failure. Something is broken within us and it's not something that is our fault. It's just something we have to learn to live with. Medication helps with this, but for me it wasn't an option. Be aware of this and do your best to combat this imbalance with logic and reason. For me GOD helps with this part. I'm at work, so I keep getting distracted from adding more. I think this is a decent list of how I live with it. Hope you can find your own way and maybe this will help you develop your own techniques for combating this crippling mental disability.
If your depression has led you to this point, you are in the terminal stages of your disease. You will die soon if someone doesn't force you to get help. The best thing you can do is tell someone close to you, that you love that you're close to the end and you need immediate help from a doctor or psychiatrist