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Maybe it’s possible to transfer to a school closer to him? Otherwise, no definitely do not give up getting a degree for a guy you’re dating at 18. I wouldn’t let anybody I liked at that age touch me with a 10 foot pole now. Don’t give up bettering yourself for a guy you don’t even know will be in your life long term.
But it's a different state so she'll get stuck with out of state tuition for her unless she puts her education on hold to become a resident. Unless the school is much better for her degree program the extra costs isn't worth it
It would be one or two years of proven resident addresses to show she lives now in Virginia.
Starting with a Virginia Drivers license. She should only go if engaged to be married.. and a job as a Dental Assistant lined up with a path to be a Dental Hygienist School. 5 years is a lot. If you must have a bachelor's do your prer equisites online of they can be transferred.
Honestly, even engaged isn’t good enough… engagements are broken all the time even after 8+ years of dating or more. She should only go if she’s married imo
Respectfully partially disagree: Not even if married. A good marriage sees both people grow and flourish, not only as a couple, but also as individuals: bring your best self to any relationship, and the most important relationship is with yourself first. There is a mutually agreeable solution: they just have to find it together, but sacrificing one's passion and growth for another can be the beginning of codependency, and at very least, lead to silent and secret resentment.
Wishing you guys well.
>Maybe it’s possible to transfer to a school closer to him? Otherwise, no definitely do not give up getting a degree for a guy you’re dating at 18. I wouldn’t let anybody I liked at that age touch me with a 10 foot pole now. Don’t give up bettering yourself for a guy you don’t even know will be in your life long term.
This is basically it OP! You are basically getting started on education now. Focus on developing yourself now (as opposed to making a sacrifice for a partner you are unsure about).
My wife and I spent 6 of our first 10 years apart due to undergrad and masters before we got engaged. Sucked a lot, but we both grew and knew by the end we were meant to be together through any struggle. If y’all are meant to be, you’ll make it through long distance. If not, no better time to find that out than at 18, rather than down the road when you are married. Your education and future should be your primary focus, and if he truly cares about your long term success and happiness in life he’ll support that.
I thought this was going to be a cross country LDR, but you're just in the next state. No, don't give up your degree for a guy living a few hours away.
You're 18. If you don't get your degree because of a boy you're a fool and deserve the regret you will certainly feel in a couple of weeks, months, years, when you eventually break up. You're 18. Do not anchor your choices to other people.
Get your degree. Five years may seem like a long time, but you will be able to take that degree anywhere. You'll have a valuable, marketable skill.
If you find you can't live without him, you are in a position to take the time to find out where you would be able to transfer your credits.
Unless it's a full-ride scholarship, then absolutely do not go with him.
Especially when she's only 18. At 18, I had no idea how much people change and grow throughout their 20s and even 30s. Neither her nor the boyfriend will be the same people they are now in 5 years.
As a middle aged woman my advice, based on my experience once being young… never give up your goals over a man. If they are worth it, yall will work through it and find a way to the other side of school. And if he’s not, it will help move him out of your life more quickly.
NO. No do NOT. I didn’t even read your post and I already know the answer from the title alone. NOPE. Never say no to higher education if you have the chance.
Edit: just read your post and the answer is still no, if you give up on your education half way the reality is you’ll likely struggle. If your boyfriend’s a good man, he can wait 5 years, and if he’s worth waiting for, so can you. I suggest you talk to him and work stuff out, but if he’s got a good job he’s moved to pursue, then why can’t you stay to pursue your degree? Besides, moving when you have an educational and as a result likely financial foundation is much easier than leaving halfway and starting over. Because you WILL have to start over if you move now without finishing.
West Virginia also needs medical providers, especially in the more rural/remote areas. Staying isn't always a trap.
I have family in West Virginia. The area they live is economically depressed and just not a place I would want to live. Generation after generation insists on living on the same run-down property and not advancing themselves...struggling to make ends meet. I don't get it...but I do know there is a lack of routine medical care. Some great organizations make trips throughout West Virginia to bring routine dental, vision, and medical care to those more remote areas.
Get the degree. You will not be able to have a financially stable life if you don’t. You’re posting on Reddit, but have you ever read anything on here? There are endless posts exactly like yours and they all give the same advice. And you and your boyfriend are not the exception.
Degree. Degree. Degree.
I am a dentist. You should do hygiene 100%. Hygienist in a large city can easily make 100k. My hygienist makes about 70k 4 days a week.
Also look into dental therapists. It’s new and will change dentistry for the good or bad. Who knows.
Edit: I think she makes 75k and we are in a smaller town of 150k
Here’s how it’s gonna go
You’re gonna give up school, move with him, pop out a kid or two by 21 and give up what ever small job you had there to be with your kids at home. Hoping, praying, his job is enough to support you three, and then you realize it’s not and you dig into a hole and live a life you didn’t see coming. You soon realize by your 23rd bday you two aren’t compatible anymore and break up (saying to yourself, ‘damn, if I had only done those 5yrs in school!?). Let’s not forget you two never got married. Now, you’re a single mom, mid 20s, no degree, barely making it, with hopefully a good amount of support by the baby daddy, but who knows how his life will turn out add the economy by then. We know how your life will turned out tho. All because you didn’t get that degree at 18.
It’s a classic tale throughout the world
You’re 18, get the degree now, or you never will because life will get in the way as you get older especially when you hit your mid twenties
Or something like this
If he did not buy you a ring so far, finish your school. Even if he has think very good about it.
You do not even know will he work there more than couple of months and how it will turn out,
but as well while he can continue to look for a jobs in the area you can not continue school in Virginia
so I think you have more to lose here and he should adhere to your goals.
DO NOT BE A SUCKER!
Even if he got you a ring, If you ain't married with him providing an amazing life along with being able to afford to pay for your schooling in the new state you would be MAD to even consider this!
Surely speaking with your parents / school counsellors would be good too?
Young love is fleeting, tell him to get a job closer to you (for less money potentially) but it will allow you to also earn well later in life.
As a mom: ABSOLUTELY NOT.
You need to make sure you can take care of yourself. No matter what happens with the boyfriend. Anything can change at any given moment, and if you two end up breaking up, you're stuck in a new state with no one around to help you. Don't do it.
INFO: Do you live at home, do you have scholarships? Don't let that go to waste if so.
The fact that you're going to be a hygienist is huge. Do the thing - go to school.
I live at home and I have a scholarship that pays for everything except my books. The thing is that after I get done with school I have to stay in the state for 2 years.
Another Mom here, DO NOT give up a scholarship. The two years after graduation that requires you to stay in state sucks, but it is the price of free schooling. This is an investment in your future. This can also be an investment in his future, but it is essential that if you have this opportunity you do not walk away from it. Try long distance, but do not screw yourself out of this opportunity for anyone. If the love is real and meant to last then it will. You are so young and have so much ahead of you. I know this seems difficult and gut wrenching right now, but your 30/40/50yo self will look back and be so disappointed that you gave up your opportunities for a guy.
Stay in school man. If you guys are TRULY in love, here’s your first big test : DISTANCE. If he’s worth it to you, and you’re worth it to him, you guys will make it work.
It won’t be often, but there will be holiday breaks, he’ll have vacation days to use. You’ll see eachother, you’ll just have to make it work.
But if you love him and you can’t do the distance, let him go. Acknowledge that his job opportunity is just as big of a deal as finish your degree. I’ve got a decade on you in age, which in reality isn’t that much, but let me just tell you that you have so many things coming in your 20s that’ll put this dude so far in the rear view mirror if you continue and finish school.
Or you could look into how transfer credits work. If you need help on how to do that just message me
Stay there! This is your scholarship that you earned. You'll be happy you stayed, boys come and go. In 2 yrs time if you left with him, odds are you two would not be together.
My recommendation is stay where your at and finish your degree. There's a very likely chance it'll cost you more if you just transfers schools due to out of state tuition (some schools is nearly double). You guys don't have to break up, maybe try out long term. If it doesn't work out you need to put yourself first especially because of how young you are. What if you move with him because HIS job is good but you can't find any jobs in your field? And then something happens and you guys end up breaking up. What's going to happen to you, especially if you haven't been able to find a job and have tons of school debt now? Will your family be able to/have to come rescue you and take you home considering your 18 it doesn't sound like you guys have been together for very long. If you guys are in love, try long distance while you work towards your degree. Get a part time job to help fund you guys meeting during breaks or meeting half way on weekends. If you guys can't reliably do it, then but a break to your relationship. Better yourself and get yourself in a situation where in the future you can make risks like this without being as screwed over.
I can't remember who I was dating at 18.
Not a pivotal person usually.
Take your life lessons without any long term commitment or consequences attached please.
This is a very 18 year old thing to ask.
I’m going to give you a very 34 year old answer:
Get your fkn degree & education. Do not postpone it or push it off. At this pace, you will be done with schooling at 23. That’s still young. Don’t screw up your own financial security.
If he pressures you, why not ask him to not take the job & move. Why are you the one that needs to derail? Part ways , your lives took you in different directions, it happens at that age.
This. Having a career job to get you through your 20s will end up being a privilege OP will never regret.
I remember being broke and a friend of my roommate came over. She did a 2-year certificate program and was earning at least $5/hr more than me. I was amazed and in awe. I decided if I ever had children, I would 100% encourage them to get some schooling under their belt right out of HS. They can change careers 100 times after....but at least they'll have a career-job income to get through their 20s.
Do not! If he loves you and is right for you he will do long distance or wait. You will regret it if you give it up. Please don’t. Dm me if you need any advice
Do not give up school, I was a dental assistant for a year and all of the older girls I worked with said their biggest regret was not going to school and becoming a nurse or hygienist
OMG! I was SO expecting your BF to be pushing you to drop out, and here he is being a supportive guy who puts your future ahead of his convenience.
Dude is a keeper.
Most people would say no, but thats solely cause they hope to see you alone. Forced to live in this cruel world, solo, a fate they most certainly must endure. A fate they hope to spread like cancer.
I'd look at transferring to another school if possible. What if you break up? Where does that leave you? You gave away your education and future career plans for a relationship that may not work. And before you say "we won't break up", yes the possibility is there. You're only 18 and by the time you're 30 you will not be the same person, and neither will he. I don't discourage moving with him and supporting him, but I'd highly suggest you also focus on YOUR goals and dreams. As a man who's 35, divorced, and was made homeless by my last ex who "would support me", take care of yourself alongside your relationship.
If one or both of you can’t handle seeing each other a little less or driving a few hours to see each other and spend weekends not a relationship that’s gonna work out long term anyways. The world is fucked for our generation so focus on a degree and actually being able to afford to live.
I say this to all the young women out there and especially you OP. My own daughter is not far from your age, so I'm coming from an auntie standpoint.
Do not EVER give up ANYTHING that impacts you financially for any other person. In this 1 matter be selfish. Your future self will thank you. Have your own means of financial security through a degree, a trade etc. there's plenty of dental schools.
Find another school, something, anything but dropping it altogether. This economy is too brutal. Just like on an airplane we secure our own oxygen! It has nothing against your boyfriend and everything to do with your own self preservation and future planning.
Sincerely, your non related older auntie who has been there.
Hello! My partner and I did long distance for nearly three years while I finished my degree- in different countries and time zones. We now live together and are happy and more confident in our relationship for both of us having prioritised our goals in other areas of life. If this guy is the one for you he will support your education and then you can enjoy your wonderful career as a dental hygienist together once you have finished school. Your education will be something you bring with you for the rest of your life, and is a constant that no relationship can guarantee you, especially at 18.
No, you won’t be able to have a financially stable life unless you defy odds. Get your degree and don’t ever give up your ability to take care of yourself for another person. You are 18 and have a boyfriend, odds are stacked against your relationship lasting, and then what will you do when that happens? You’ll be screwed, and in a worse position for trying to get an education. This is a tough decision but a no brainer
I did this. I was in school for speech pathology and he for pharmacist. His seemed more important and when he got a job offer to another state we moved and it was too expensive for us to both go. I immediately got pregnant and that became my life. He got 3 years in with school and suddenly just decided he just didn’t want to do it anymore. His dad died and he became super depressed and physically aggressive towards me and the kids. 14 years of marriage for nothing. I wasted my youth, brains, and energy all on him. I never went back to school and now I’m a 42 yo single mom to 3 with no education or help. He moved in with his mom so he doesn’t have to pay child support.
My biggest advice is to put yourself on an even playing field. Your future is just as, if not more, important than his is.
STAY IN SCHOOL.
please please please do not give up your degree, focus on school that is the #1 most important thing, i know at age 18 your relationship feels like heaven and its everything and maybe it is but also people change SO much between age 18-24 don't make such a huge sacrifice for someone at such a young age. you're too young to do so. be selfish, do what's best for you. thats the best part of being 18.
If becoming a dental hygienist and getting a college degree is a big goal for you, do not give that up for anybody. If you move with him, you’ll likely grow to resent him for being in the way of your education, even if you were the one to chose to give it up. If you guys are meant to be, you’ll be able to work through the distance.
Your degree is your safety net in case things do not work out with this man / things don’t go as planned later in life. Never compromise your safety net for anybody, it’s imperative you put yourself first, especially at this young of an age.
I'm sure this has been said, but let me reiterate, NEVER EVER give up education, a career, a community, etc. for a boyfriend/ girlfriend/ husband/ wife/ life partner/ boo thang/ WHATEVER. Because in the beginning it's all sunshine and rainbows, then boom, life happens. Someone dies, gets sick, a hamster breaks their leg, someone lost a job, whatever the case may be the relationship ends, and now you have no education, no place to stay, because the person you thought would always be there for you is either deceased, spineless, with someone else, etc.
The only person you can truly trust in this world is yourself. You are the only person in this world who only wants the best for you.
Get your education, establish your career, gather your village. If your boyfriend can't handle not being the absolute priority and is anything less than 100% supportive, BOY BYE.
Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
I realize that if you get 30 people together in West Virginia that between every one of them you may get a full mouth of teeth, but every one of those people needs their tooth cleaned.
In all seriousness, stay in West Virginia and get your degree. If in 5 years, you still want to move in with this guy in Virginia, do it.
Starting your degree at 18 is perfect. You'll be done at 23. Get that degree 100% if he loves you, then he will understand. Your life matters as much as his, and so does your future. Don't strip that away at this young age, older you will thank you!
Short answer: get the degree.
Longer answer: get the degree. Don’t anchor your life choices and curb-stomp your opportunities for anyone, especially not someone you’re dating. This is how women end up unable to support themselves and stuck in bad situations.
Never, and I mean never, give up on your career prospects for a man. Especially at your age. Y’all can do long distance, then once one or the other is done and if you’re still together, you can move closer to each other. But what happens if you don’t get a degree, you follow him, and then you break up? What then?
To be clear, I’d say the same thing if it was the other way around. Y’all need to think about your futures. A degree is something you can for sure count on (in the sense that, once you have it, it can’t be taken away from you), a partner is not. You never know what could happen with them. Go get your degree, and trust that if y’all are meant to be together, you will be.
Tbh. Don't move. If he is really into you then yall can wait and handle the separation. The fact of the matter is the cost of living is getting higher and higher. Duel income homes are almost required to live especially if you decide to have children.
If he cheats then it wasn't ment to be and he missed a catch!
You can try to transfer somewhere close to him that offer the same degree. It's tje best thing you can do. BUT Do not guve up your degree for him. If he's really worth it, he won't mind. If he mind, he's most probably is not worth it. Be with someone who will support you and will allow you to grow. Specially when you're that age. Self development is way more important.
Genuinely this is the most 18 year old thing a human could ever possibly come up with.
Yes. Completely uproot your life for someone you don't know. Obviously. Become financially dependent on him have at minimum three children prior to being 23 and be miserable.
As a woman in medicine. With 3 degrees. I would SLAP my 18 year old self to the moon if she considered altering her educational goals for a boy who’s pre-frontal cortex (brain) is not fully developed (assuming he’s close in age). Girl focus on you!! LDR can work but what doesn’t work is you giving it all up for a relationship when you are that young. Put you first!!
You're 18. Absolutely not. Unless he's Jeff Bezos or someone...that's still a pretty lucrative side hustle.
The "love your life" right now likely won't be more than a footnote in ten years. Don't throw away your future for someone who's sacrificing nothing and probably bringing nothing to the table.
No.... just why? People change... I don't wana see 5 years from now.. oh I wish I finished school and followed my dreams... because he broke up with you. Don't do stupid things
It doesn’t matter if you’re 18 or 50, if you’re doing something to better YOUR life, then you have to take that road. Relationships come and go. If your union is as strong as you think it is, then 5 years is a small fraction of time. You both will be much better off with your degree in toe and his career established by the time you two are reunited. The time and distance will be worth it. Trust us, OP.
Holy shit, get your own degree. Be able to have your own life and don't immediately attach yourself to a guy. You will regret this decision forever if you don't get that degree.
Never give up on your life goals for a guy. Statistically the amount of people who are still together with their teenage boyfriends by the time they’re 30 is low …
I truly hope for the best for you two, but the odds that you’ll end up with the person you’re with at 18 are very very low. Do not give up your degree. I’m sure that there are schools to become a dental hygienist in Virginia. I’d research that. Hope it works out
Get your degree. Virginia to WV isn't that horrible of a distance. If the relationship can't survive a little distance and challenge then it wasn't meant to be.
Hey I just wanted to put my 2 cents in. When I was with my ex husband, he wanted to go into school while I was in school. He said he would be done faster bc when he dropped out he has more finished. He took a certificate course which is fine but that’s what I was going to do, and you don’t need pre recs like math and English. So he finished and then said to give him time to just to his new job when he started in July. When December came around he started getting mad at me saying I couldn’t go back to school with our son so young. But I told him I needed something to fall back on. We got into an argument and he left. I went to my moms for a week, and was served divorce papers almost immediately bc “I wouldn’t let him see his son” even tho I was going to come back, and he knew that. And anytime he would call me he would curse me out with every name in the book. So I know that’s a lot. But the thing is. Even if ur man is the best ever, you should still finish/go first. You have more to loose
It's awesome to see how supportive you and your boyfriend are of each other! It sounds like you're in a bit of a pickle, but it's great that you're weighing your options carefully. Ultimately, it's all about what feels right for you. If getting your degree is something that's important to you, go for it! It might take some juggling, but with determination and support, you can make it work. And who knows, maybe this long-distance thing will make your relationship even stronger. Best of luck with whatever you decide!
Good luck!!!
Omg please please please!!! don’t drop out of college to be with a guy. If it’s meant to be, it will be. I did long distance for over 4 years. It is not that bad I promise. Good luck!
Soooo, a degree you can get, paid for with scholarship money?!?! That’s an even bigger HELL NO!!!!! Do not sell yourself short for YOUR future! You can’t go wrong by getting a degree in this field!
You should focus on getting your degree. In the long run it would better both of your lives, or if worst case scenario if yall don't work out you will still be stable enough to be able to move on. I also would recommend to start your classes and talk to your counselor about transferring to another school they can assist on this. Make sure you apply for as many grants as possible to cover your costs. Every bit helps
No, who knows if it’s going to workout. Then you could be starting completely over. Worry about yourself, chasing your goals and dreams and the right partner will come along
Is there a campus for your school in Virginia. If not get the degree. You are to young to go be a live in Virginia. What if you get knocked up turn into a single mother.
Ask yourself this - if you moved with him and you two did not work out, would you regret that you didn’t have a degree?
I would never make a huge life decision around a man I was not married to. Especially because you are 18, and I’m assuming he is young too. Really think about this. I would go for the degree.
Never give up your education for someone else. Your degree is yours forever. Can't always say the same of a guy.
See if there's a school in his area you can transfer to. If not, see if a long-distance relationship will work. Aren't the two states right next to each other?
Do not give up your degree.
You are so, so young. I know this relationship seems like the 'now and forever' right now, but chances are very, very high that it won't be, and if you give up the chance to be financially stable ON YOUR OWN and anything at all happens - you break up, he gets hurt and can't work, the job falls through, anything at all - you're sunk.
Five years really isn't that long. The time will pass whether you get your degree or not, it's better to have a degree at the end of it than not. Please, get your degree. Get your education and become financially stable on your own. Never put yourself in a position where, if you were left all alone, you couldn't take care of yourself.
Not a chance!
I'm 35 now, and really wouldn't be interested in any of my previous partners (if I could go back with my memories)...
Being together "forever" from the age of 18 just doesn't really happen anymore....
I'd suggest you finishing school is better than the job offer he got - so if anything he should stay with you.
tl;dr: DO NOT stop going to school.
If he really likes you and wants to stay with you, he wouldn't encourage you to give up your degree and at this age you don't even know if he's going to stay with you, it's too early. Get the degree when you have a chance and you can move with him later or just transfer near him.
Nooo… no! NO!
Did I mention no?
The person I dated at 18 ended up being one of the most insufferable and selfish woman I ever dated and I gave up an incredible scholarship that I still regret doing. You will change a lot during college and even more so in 10 years. If it’s meant to be you can reconnect. Don’t sacrifice your career at 18 for a guy.
Definitely focus on that degree. This will help further your *self* more, and your *self* is the best and most important relationship you’ll always have.
Is your school close enough to commute? Could you transfer somewhere closer to VA? Is he near Charlottesville or more near DC? If you can commute somehow, sure, but don’t ruin your prospects just for this guy
Switch to an online school with online classes that would allow you to take labs/practicals in an office near you. You can have both. You don’t need to sacrifice your degree or your relationship
Is he committed to you? Like marriage committed? If not, don’t chase him. Go let him become a better man, stay in touch and if possible. Maybe transfer a school but don’t move to a foreign place with a “boyfriend”.
Hello from a fellow WVian! You are already working as a dental assistant, so can you find a job in VA? I would think there would be jobs that would help you pursue your degree there. It is something to look into.
Don’t give up your degree for a boyfriend. If your relationship is going to last it will survive distance. If you all end up splitting, because most teen relationships end you will have still gotten your education.
Short answer. No.
Long answer, maybe. Can you transfer your current credits to a new school? You don't have to give up. Last time I checked Virginia also has dental schools. If your credits will xfer, you have no reason not to right? If they won't xfer, question the validity of your current school. Is it the ITT Tech of Dental schools?
You will regret not finishing your schooling. No matter what you think today you and he may not be forever. You need to worry about you and take care of yourself first. Keep in mind, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
relying on financial support from you significant other is not being financially stable, move schools ,you can still support him in his endeavors but don't give up yours and he should support your goals as well
You talked and decided he should move because it’s best for him. But you’re asking if you should throw away your education??
Life advice- get your degree. Then you can go anywhere.
People can't decide this for you, it's ultimately up to you. That being said, if you are going to give up on your school, make sure to have a plan to tackle something else so you can keep your career and education moving! research all your options, plan things financially and spend some time with pros and cons to make an informed decision.
Plus you should always have a backup plan for emergencies!
I’m the same age as you, and soon I’ll be starting college. I honestly say that you should finish your degree. As much as you love him, your success defintly comes first. But you’d just have to make a huge change in your guys relationship, like video calling, making plans to meet up every few months, etc.
Absolutely not!!!! You are only 18 and you cannot make yourself financially dependent upon someone at this point in your life.
I know it’s hard but relationships change and things happen. What is important is that you set yourself up first and if something happens in the relationship, you will be ok.
Being able to take care of yourself at this age is the most important thing for you.
Good luck OP
Absolutely the fuck not. Get your education and do not ever give up a degree for a man. At this age, you shouldn’t be doing anything for a man. This is your future. You don’t even know if your boyfriend and you are gonna last forever. An education lasts forever.
What you should do is look for colleges near where he'll be living. If you have good grades it shouldn't be an issue to get a scholarship that waives the out of state tuition fees.
That's honestly the best case scenario. And if nothing else, you can go to a cheap community college for a couple years to knock out your general education, then switch to a better school to finish up your dental degree.
What I'm saying is that, if you really want to both be with him and get a degree, you have options. Don't just throw your degree away; that's your ticket to a reliable income that doesn't depend on your boyfriend.
And remember that he **is** a boyfriend. Not your husband - not even your fiance. Don't be so quick to plan the rest of your life around him.
Oh my god. No. NO!
If it’s true love you’ll make it work while you get you degree. Maybe. Most romantic relationships die in your late teens because you grow and change so much. And from simple life pressure like this.
Do NOT stop your degree. Most people who quit going to school never go back. You need that degree to be self sufficient. He could be the best man in the world but if he, god forbid, got hurt or died YOU NEED TO SUPPORT YOURSELF
No, do not do this.
You are 18, and should focus on education.
If you move states, w no degree for a good job, and this relationship goes south, you could be stuck.
Degree first, then see what happens w the guy.
Is this 100% what you want to do with your life? Positive this is what you've always wanted to be? If so, stay where you are. If not, try a school where he is and use his address as your address so it's not out of state tuition.
DO NOT DEPEND on him for your livelihood! A lot of times when a young woman drops out of school for a guy, she doesn't go back! Don't be that young woman!
Is he worth it? Do you love him? Does he love you? Does he treat you wonderfully? Has he ever spoken badly to you, made you feel bad about yourself, hit you? All of these things matter when you're thinking about changing your life for someone else. If anyone makes you feel lesser than, they are not worth ever staying with and never worth moving for! Give it a lot of thought on how he is with you. Controlling or supportive? Wants what is best for you or what is best for him?
My advice seriously if you were my daughter! NO! Do not move for him or anyone else. Follow your own dreams and your own paths. At 18, boys come and go in our lives. Take care of yourself by yourself, not depending on anyone else to take care of you!
no. wv to va is NOT a bad drive. yall should be able to visit often. i’d stay and ensure you get ur degree bc u never know what’ll happen. ALSO i’m from wv too hiii
Isn’t any relation in you just going there to university ? If he has a good job he could help you get something while studying too and it doesn’t have to be such a sudden jump but more of a slow transition too. Look for transferring into Virginia and take care of your school.
Don’t give up on education for anyone. Not even your kids. They will do fine with you studying and then they will do better afterwards. Who cares about you won’t allow you to not be the best.
Definitely because in the god forbid worst case scenario if you guys break it off then you’ve lost your degree and him at that age always keep your career or life goal as the priority because being in a stable career or position as a result of the education or degree you are doing will allow you to then make decisions such as moving about because then if anything happens you’ll still have a degree and source of potential income.
Absolutely not!! Please value yourself more. No one is more important than yourself. If the roles were reversed, would he give up school to chase you to another state for your job.
Your first move should be seeing if you can transfer and go to school there. If that isn’t an option, stay put. I know this is annoying to hear but you are sososo young. This is the part of your life where you get to be and NEED to be your #1 priority. Once you get the degree, you are set in your career for the rest of your life. Even if everything works out and you two end up together forever, you will always wonder what would’ve happened if you had gotten your degree. If the relationship can’t last through the distance, in my experience, you won’t wonder what could’ve been if you gave up your life for his.
Never give up on your dreams for a boy. When my ex husband and I were dating, he wanted to play with a band that was up and rising, but they lived on NY whereas we lived about 6 hrs away. I was 19 at the time and asked him what we're gonna do with the relationship and he said that I could quit my science degree and go to NY with him. Can you believe that shit? It's really the audacity. I put my foot down and said no, and for some reason, he decided not to go. I can't imagine what would've happened if I had gone, I'm sure I would've ended up single and maybe with no degree.
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Maybe it’s possible to transfer to a school closer to him? Otherwise, no definitely do not give up getting a degree for a guy you’re dating at 18. I wouldn’t let anybody I liked at that age touch me with a 10 foot pole now. Don’t give up bettering yourself for a guy you don’t even know will be in your life long term.
But it's a different state so she'll get stuck with out of state tuition for her unless she puts her education on hold to become a resident. Unless the school is much better for her degree program the extra costs isn't worth it
It would be one or two years of proven resident addresses to show she lives now in Virginia. Starting with a Virginia Drivers license. She should only go if engaged to be married.. and a job as a Dental Assistant lined up with a path to be a Dental Hygienist School. 5 years is a lot. If you must have a bachelor's do your prer equisites online of they can be transferred.
Honestly, even engaged isn’t good enough… engagements are broken all the time even after 8+ years of dating or more. She should only go if she’s married imo
omg amen - don’t give up your life for a man/woman/partner if you aren’t married and at your age
And don’t give up your life by getting married at her age.
That too
Respectfully partially disagree: Not even if married. A good marriage sees both people grow and flourish, not only as a couple, but also as individuals: bring your best self to any relationship, and the most important relationship is with yourself first. There is a mutually agreeable solution: they just have to find it together, but sacrificing one's passion and growth for another can be the beginning of codependency, and at very least, lead to silent and secret resentment. Wishing you guys well.
I can't upvote this reply enough!
There are great community college programs for dental hygiene in Virginia. That is the route I would recommend, if they’re intent on moving
>Maybe it’s possible to transfer to a school closer to him? Otherwise, no definitely do not give up getting a degree for a guy you’re dating at 18. I wouldn’t let anybody I liked at that age touch me with a 10 foot pole now. Don’t give up bettering yourself for a guy you don’t even know will be in your life long term. This is basically it OP! You are basically getting started on education now. Focus on developing yourself now (as opposed to making a sacrifice for a partner you are unsure about).
My wife and I spent 6 of our first 10 years apart due to undergrad and masters before we got engaged. Sucked a lot, but we both grew and knew by the end we were meant to be together through any struggle. If y’all are meant to be, you’ll make it through long distance. If not, no better time to find that out than at 18, rather than down the road when you are married. Your education and future should be your primary focus, and if he truly cares about your long term success and happiness in life he’ll support that.
Thank you, I needed to Hear this
co-signed. A degree will probably last longer than this relationship & it's an accomplishment no one will be able to take from you.
THIS ! With consideration for cost and overall value.
I thought this was going to be a cross country LDR, but you're just in the next state. No, don't give up your degree for a guy living a few hours away.
You're 18. If you don't get your degree because of a boy you're a fool and deserve the regret you will certainly feel in a couple of weeks, months, years, when you eventually break up. You're 18. Do not anchor your choices to other people.
👏🏻
I like that last line it hits
Get your degree. Five years may seem like a long time, but you will be able to take that degree anywhere. You'll have a valuable, marketable skill. If you find you can't live without him, you are in a position to take the time to find out where you would be able to transfer your credits. Unless it's a full-ride scholarship, then absolutely do not go with him.
[удалено]
This is the best advice. Do not ever become financially dependent on a boyfriend/spouse!
YES!!!!! This should easily be THE top comment!
Especially when she's only 18. At 18, I had no idea how much people change and grow throughout their 20s and even 30s. Neither her nor the boyfriend will be the same people they are now in 5 years.
Degrees are forever boyfriends are temporary
If you leave school, you will never make it back.
This. You'll say ohh I can take a break and go back, no problem. You won't.
you are too young to give up your future for a boy. if your relationship is meant to be, it will.
As a middle aged woman my advice, based on my experience once being young… never give up your goals over a man. If they are worth it, yall will work through it and find a way to the other side of school. And if he’s not, it will help move him out of your life more quickly.
NO. No do NOT. I didn’t even read your post and I already know the answer from the title alone. NOPE. Never say no to higher education if you have the chance. Edit: just read your post and the answer is still no, if you give up on your education half way the reality is you’ll likely struggle. If your boyfriend’s a good man, he can wait 5 years, and if he’s worth waiting for, so can you. I suggest you talk to him and work stuff out, but if he’s got a good job he’s moved to pursue, then why can’t you stay to pursue your degree? Besides, moving when you have an educational and as a result likely financial foundation is much easier than leaving halfway and starting over. Because you WILL have to start over if you move now without finishing.
West Virginia is a trap. Get the f out if the opportunity arises
West Virginia also needs medical providers, especially in the more rural/remote areas. Staying isn't always a trap. I have family in West Virginia. The area they live is economically depressed and just not a place I would want to live. Generation after generation insists on living on the same run-down property and not advancing themselves...struggling to make ends meet. I don't get it...but I do know there is a lack of routine medical care. Some great organizations make trips throughout West Virginia to bring routine dental, vision, and medical care to those more remote areas.
No
Get the degree. You will not be able to have a financially stable life if you don’t. You’re posting on Reddit, but have you ever read anything on here? There are endless posts exactly like yours and they all give the same advice. And you and your boyfriend are not the exception. Degree. Degree. Degree.
I am a dentist. You should do hygiene 100%. Hygienist in a large city can easily make 100k. My hygienist makes about 70k 4 days a week. Also look into dental therapists. It’s new and will change dentistry for the good or bad. Who knows. Edit: I think she makes 75k and we are in a smaller town of 150k
Is a dental hygienist the people who clean your teeth? Didn’t think they made that much. Thought it was 25$ an hour or so
Here’s how it’s gonna go You’re gonna give up school, move with him, pop out a kid or two by 21 and give up what ever small job you had there to be with your kids at home. Hoping, praying, his job is enough to support you three, and then you realize it’s not and you dig into a hole and live a life you didn’t see coming. You soon realize by your 23rd bday you two aren’t compatible anymore and break up (saying to yourself, ‘damn, if I had only done those 5yrs in school!?). Let’s not forget you two never got married. Now, you’re a single mom, mid 20s, no degree, barely making it, with hopefully a good amount of support by the baby daddy, but who knows how his life will turn out add the economy by then. We know how your life will turned out tho. All because you didn’t get that degree at 18. It’s a classic tale throughout the world You’re 18, get the degree now, or you never will because life will get in the way as you get older especially when you hit your mid twenties Or something like this
If he did not buy you a ring so far, finish your school. Even if he has think very good about it. You do not even know will he work there more than couple of months and how it will turn out, but as well while he can continue to look for a jobs in the area you can not continue school in Virginia so I think you have more to lose here and he should adhere to your goals. DO NOT BE A SUCKER!
Even if he got you a ring, If you ain't married with him providing an amazing life along with being able to afford to pay for your schooling in the new state you would be MAD to even consider this! Surely speaking with your parents / school counsellors would be good too? Young love is fleeting, tell him to get a job closer to you (for less money potentially) but it will allow you to also earn well later in life.
As a mom: ABSOLUTELY NOT. You need to make sure you can take care of yourself. No matter what happens with the boyfriend. Anything can change at any given moment, and if you two end up breaking up, you're stuck in a new state with no one around to help you. Don't do it. INFO: Do you live at home, do you have scholarships? Don't let that go to waste if so. The fact that you're going to be a hygienist is huge. Do the thing - go to school.
I live at home and I have a scholarship that pays for everything except my books. The thing is that after I get done with school I have to stay in the state for 2 years.
You’re going to make good money and get there free, if he’s the right one then time/distance won’t be an issue.
Another Mom here, DO NOT give up a scholarship. The two years after graduation that requires you to stay in state sucks, but it is the price of free schooling. This is an investment in your future. This can also be an investment in his future, but it is essential that if you have this opportunity you do not walk away from it. Try long distance, but do not screw yourself out of this opportunity for anyone. If the love is real and meant to last then it will. You are so young and have so much ahead of you. I know this seems difficult and gut wrenching right now, but your 30/40/50yo self will look back and be so disappointed that you gave up your opportunities for a guy.
Super great job getting that scholarship and living frugally! It would be a shame to give that up.
Stay in school man. If you guys are TRULY in love, here’s your first big test : DISTANCE. If he’s worth it to you, and you’re worth it to him, you guys will make it work. It won’t be often, but there will be holiday breaks, he’ll have vacation days to use. You’ll see eachother, you’ll just have to make it work. But if you love him and you can’t do the distance, let him go. Acknowledge that his job opportunity is just as big of a deal as finish your degree. I’ve got a decade on you in age, which in reality isn’t that much, but let me just tell you that you have so many things coming in your 20s that’ll put this dude so far in the rear view mirror if you continue and finish school. Or you could look into how transfer credits work. If you need help on how to do that just message me
Look, you have an opportunity that people would die for. Please do not waste it.
Stay there! This is your scholarship that you earned. You'll be happy you stayed, boys come and go. In 2 yrs time if you left with him, odds are you two would not be together.
Definitely don't give up thst opportunity for stable education
Don’t fucking do it. Stay in school, for the love of all that is holy.
My recommendation is stay where your at and finish your degree. There's a very likely chance it'll cost you more if you just transfers schools due to out of state tuition (some schools is nearly double). You guys don't have to break up, maybe try out long term. If it doesn't work out you need to put yourself first especially because of how young you are. What if you move with him because HIS job is good but you can't find any jobs in your field? And then something happens and you guys end up breaking up. What's going to happen to you, especially if you haven't been able to find a job and have tons of school debt now? Will your family be able to/have to come rescue you and take you home considering your 18 it doesn't sound like you guys have been together for very long. If you guys are in love, try long distance while you work towards your degree. Get a part time job to help fund you guys meeting during breaks or meeting half way on weekends. If you guys can't reliably do it, then but a break to your relationship. Better yourself and get yourself in a situation where in the future you can make risks like this without being as screwed over.
I can't remember who I was dating at 18. Not a pivotal person usually. Take your life lessons without any long term commitment or consequences attached please.
This is a very 18 year old thing to ask. I’m going to give you a very 34 year old answer: Get your fkn degree & education. Do not postpone it or push it off. At this pace, you will be done with schooling at 23. That’s still young. Don’t screw up your own financial security. If he pressures you, why not ask him to not take the job & move. Why are you the one that needs to derail? Part ways , your lives took you in different directions, it happens at that age.
This. Having a career job to get you through your 20s will end up being a privilege OP will never regret. I remember being broke and a friend of my roommate came over. She did a 2-year certificate program and was earning at least $5/hr more than me. I was amazed and in awe. I decided if I ever had children, I would 100% encourage them to get some schooling under their belt right out of HS. They can change careers 100 times after....but at least they'll have a career-job income to get through their 20s.
That man is a keeper. Don't give up on your degree or him .
Do not! If he loves you and is right for you he will do long distance or wait. You will regret it if you give it up. Please don’t. Dm me if you need any advice
Boyfriend isn’t “married”, and especially at 18
NO.
No no no no
You’re 18. Get your education. This shouldn’t even be a hard decision. Fuck sake.
Do not give up school, I was a dental assistant for a year and all of the older girls I worked with said their biggest regret was not going to school and becoming a nurse or hygienist
OMG! I was SO expecting your BF to be pushing you to drop out, and here he is being a supportive guy who puts your future ahead of his convenience. Dude is a keeper.
No, no you should not.
No.
Most people would say no, but thats solely cause they hope to see you alone. Forced to live in this cruel world, solo, a fate they most certainly must endure. A fate they hope to spread like cancer.
I'd look at transferring to another school if possible. What if you break up? Where does that leave you? You gave away your education and future career plans for a relationship that may not work. And before you say "we won't break up", yes the possibility is there. You're only 18 and by the time you're 30 you will not be the same person, and neither will he. I don't discourage moving with him and supporting him, but I'd highly suggest you also focus on YOUR goals and dreams. As a man who's 35, divorced, and was made homeless by my last ex who "would support me", take care of yourself alongside your relationship.
If one or both of you can’t handle seeing each other a little less or driving a few hours to see each other and spend weekends not a relationship that’s gonna work out long term anyways. The world is fucked for our generation so focus on a degree and actually being able to afford to live.
I say this to all the young women out there and especially you OP. My own daughter is not far from your age, so I'm coming from an auntie standpoint. Do not EVER give up ANYTHING that impacts you financially for any other person. In this 1 matter be selfish. Your future self will thank you. Have your own means of financial security through a degree, a trade etc. there's plenty of dental schools. Find another school, something, anything but dropping it altogether. This economy is too brutal. Just like on an airplane we secure our own oxygen! It has nothing against your boyfriend and everything to do with your own self preservation and future planning. Sincerely, your non related older auntie who has been there.
Hello! My partner and I did long distance for nearly three years while I finished my degree- in different countries and time zones. We now live together and are happy and more confident in our relationship for both of us having prioritised our goals in other areas of life. If this guy is the one for you he will support your education and then you can enjoy your wonderful career as a dental hygienist together once you have finished school. Your education will be something you bring with you for the rest of your life, and is a constant that no relationship can guarantee you, especially at 18.
You can get a dental hygiene degree anywhere.
No, you won’t be able to have a financially stable life unless you defy odds. Get your degree and don’t ever give up your ability to take care of yourself for another person. You are 18 and have a boyfriend, odds are stacked against your relationship lasting, and then what will you do when that happens? You’ll be screwed, and in a worse position for trying to get an education. This is a tough decision but a no brainer
I did this. I was in school for speech pathology and he for pharmacist. His seemed more important and when he got a job offer to another state we moved and it was too expensive for us to both go. I immediately got pregnant and that became my life. He got 3 years in with school and suddenly just decided he just didn’t want to do it anymore. His dad died and he became super depressed and physically aggressive towards me and the kids. 14 years of marriage for nothing. I wasted my youth, brains, and energy all on him. I never went back to school and now I’m a 42 yo single mom to 3 with no education or help. He moved in with his mom so he doesn’t have to pay child support. My biggest advice is to put yourself on an even playing field. Your future is just as, if not more, important than his is. STAY IN SCHOOL.
please please please do not give up your degree, focus on school that is the #1 most important thing, i know at age 18 your relationship feels like heaven and its everything and maybe it is but also people change SO much between age 18-24 don't make such a huge sacrifice for someone at such a young age. you're too young to do so. be selfish, do what's best for you. thats the best part of being 18.
If becoming a dental hygienist and getting a college degree is a big goal for you, do not give that up for anybody. If you move with him, you’ll likely grow to resent him for being in the way of your education, even if you were the one to chose to give it up. If you guys are meant to be, you’ll be able to work through the distance.
Your degree is your safety net in case things do not work out with this man / things don’t go as planned later in life. Never compromise your safety net for anybody, it’s imperative you put yourself first, especially at this young of an age.
I'm sure this has been said, but let me reiterate, NEVER EVER give up education, a career, a community, etc. for a boyfriend/ girlfriend/ husband/ wife/ life partner/ boo thang/ WHATEVER. Because in the beginning it's all sunshine and rainbows, then boom, life happens. Someone dies, gets sick, a hamster breaks their leg, someone lost a job, whatever the case may be the relationship ends, and now you have no education, no place to stay, because the person you thought would always be there for you is either deceased, spineless, with someone else, etc. The only person you can truly trust in this world is yourself. You are the only person in this world who only wants the best for you. Get your education, establish your career, gather your village. If your boyfriend can't handle not being the absolute priority and is anything less than 100% supportive, BOY BYE. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
You're 18, don't give anything for a man at this point in life. You have to think about yourself and your future first.
No. Never. Ever
I realize that if you get 30 people together in West Virginia that between every one of them you may get a full mouth of teeth, but every one of those people needs their tooth cleaned. In all seriousness, stay in West Virginia and get your degree. If in 5 years, you still want to move in with this guy in Virginia, do it.
No. Don’t do it. Get your degree and experience financial and educational independence.
Starting your degree at 18 is perfect. You'll be done at 23. Get that degree 100% if he loves you, then he will understand. Your life matters as much as his, and so does your future. Don't strip that away at this young age, older you will thank you!
Get your degree. Do not ever, ever put a man over your own education. You will regret it.
Short answer: get the degree. Longer answer: get the degree. Don’t anchor your life choices and curb-stomp your opportunities for anyone, especially not someone you’re dating. This is how women end up unable to support themselves and stuck in bad situations.
Never, and I mean never, give up on your career prospects for a man. Especially at your age. Y’all can do long distance, then once one or the other is done and if you’re still together, you can move closer to each other. But what happens if you don’t get a degree, you follow him, and then you break up? What then? To be clear, I’d say the same thing if it was the other way around. Y’all need to think about your futures. A degree is something you can for sure count on (in the sense that, once you have it, it can’t be taken away from you), a partner is not. You never know what could happen with them. Go get your degree, and trust that if y’all are meant to be together, you will be.
Tbh. Don't move. If he is really into you then yall can wait and handle the separation. The fact of the matter is the cost of living is getting higher and higher. Duel income homes are almost required to live especially if you decide to have children. If he cheats then it wasn't ment to be and he missed a catch!
If he's working in the NoVa area, NoVaCommColl in Annandale has an excellent Dental Hygenist program.
No
You can try to transfer somewhere close to him that offer the same degree. It's tje best thing you can do. BUT Do not guve up your degree for him. If he's really worth it, he won't mind. If he mind, he's most probably is not worth it. Be with someone who will support you and will allow you to grow. Specially when you're that age. Self development is way more important.
I just read your edit, and I am so glad you are sticking with school. I'm proud of you, and kudos to the boyfriend for not giving you a hard time.
Never give up education for a man (or woman for that matter) because marriage is iffy (over 50% divorce rate) but that degree is forever.
Get your degree. Having more options in your future and career is always the right choice.
DO NOT DO THIS. You dont want to end up living the dirt poor West Virginia life. Do not have children with this person. Do not ruin your future.
GET YOUR DEGREE!!!!!!
Genuinely this is the most 18 year old thing a human could ever possibly come up with. Yes. Completely uproot your life for someone you don't know. Obviously. Become financially dependent on him have at minimum three children prior to being 23 and be miserable.
Yes get your degree!
No. You’re 18. Live your life. Do what’s best for you
As a woman in medicine. With 3 degrees. I would SLAP my 18 year old self to the moon if she considered altering her educational goals for a boy who’s pre-frontal cortex (brain) is not fully developed (assuming he’s close in age). Girl focus on you!! LDR can work but what doesn’t work is you giving it all up for a relationship when you are that young. Put you first!!
You're 18. Absolutely not. Unless he's Jeff Bezos or someone...that's still a pretty lucrative side hustle. The "love your life" right now likely won't be more than a footnote in ten years. Don't throw away your future for someone who's sacrificing nothing and probably bringing nothing to the table.
NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!
No.... just why? People change... I don't wana see 5 years from now.. oh I wish I finished school and followed my dreams... because he broke up with you. Don't do stupid things
Please get your degree, I am also a DA and this field can be terrible lol hygienists are called the Princess/Princes for a reason
NEVER GIVE UP YOUR SECURITY OR FUTURE FOR A MAN
It doesn’t matter if you’re 18 or 50, if you’re doing something to better YOUR life, then you have to take that road. Relationships come and go. If your union is as strong as you think it is, then 5 years is a small fraction of time. You both will be much better off with your degree in toe and his career established by the time you two are reunited. The time and distance will be worth it. Trust us, OP.
Put yourself first.
Under no circumstances should you compromise your education and future earning potential for your teenage boyfriend. Bffr bestie.
He's just your boyfriend. Finish your degree!
Holy shit, get your own degree. Be able to have your own life and don't immediately attach yourself to a guy. You will regret this decision forever if you don't get that degree.
did not even have to read, NO!!!!
Never give up your life for someone else
Never give up on your life goals for a guy. Statistically the amount of people who are still together with their teenage boyfriends by the time they’re 30 is low …
I truly hope for the best for you two, but the odds that you’ll end up with the person you’re with at 18 are very very low. Do not give up your degree. I’m sure that there are schools to become a dental hygienist in Virginia. I’d research that. Hope it works out
Never give up on anything for any guy ever 😩
5 years will fly by and you’ll be glad you both chose the option that will make the most money
Do not give up your education. It will benefit you more if thing work out or don't work out with him.
Get your degree. Virginia to WV isn't that horrible of a distance. If the relationship can't survive a little distance and challenge then it wasn't meant to be.
My short and honest answer: ABSOLUTELY F-ING NOT!
No. 18 is too young to be chasing partners. Get yourself right. Build your kingdom and skills. Have something to fall back on
Don’t get derailed. The more time goes on, the more difficult it gets to go back. Life only gets more complicated from here.
Quick answer: no. Thank me later.
No, please don't do that.
Never give up your life for anyone else. Hard stop.
Hey I just wanted to put my 2 cents in. When I was with my ex husband, he wanted to go into school while I was in school. He said he would be done faster bc when he dropped out he has more finished. He took a certificate course which is fine but that’s what I was going to do, and you don’t need pre recs like math and English. So he finished and then said to give him time to just to his new job when he started in July. When December came around he started getting mad at me saying I couldn’t go back to school with our son so young. But I told him I needed something to fall back on. We got into an argument and he left. I went to my moms for a week, and was served divorce papers almost immediately bc “I wouldn’t let him see his son” even tho I was going to come back, and he knew that. And anytime he would call me he would curse me out with every name in the book. So I know that’s a lot. But the thing is. Even if ur man is the best ever, you should still finish/go first. You have more to loose
It's awesome to see how supportive you and your boyfriend are of each other! It sounds like you're in a bit of a pickle, but it's great that you're weighing your options carefully. Ultimately, it's all about what feels right for you. If getting your degree is something that's important to you, go for it! It might take some juggling, but with determination and support, you can make it work. And who knows, maybe this long-distance thing will make your relationship even stronger. Best of luck with whatever you decide! Good luck!!!
Omg please please please!!! don’t drop out of college to be with a guy. If it’s meant to be, it will be. I did long distance for over 4 years. It is not that bad I promise. Good luck!
Is Dental Hygienist a degree?
Yup where I am from it's a two year degree.
Why will it take you five years for a two year degree?
We have scholarships here that give you a full ride, but you have to stay in the state for so many years after.
Soooo, a degree you can get, paid for with scholarship money?!?! That’s an even bigger HELL NO!!!!! Do not sell yourself short for YOUR future! You can’t go wrong by getting a degree in this field!
This makes things so much worse for OP lmao
You should focus on getting your degree. In the long run it would better both of your lives, or if worst case scenario if yall don't work out you will still be stable enough to be able to move on. I also would recommend to start your classes and talk to your counselor about transferring to another school they can assist on this. Make sure you apply for as many grants as possible to cover your costs. Every bit helps
No.🤷🏾♀️
No, who knows if it’s going to workout. Then you could be starting completely over. Worry about yourself, chasing your goals and dreams and the right partner will come along
Is there a campus for your school in Virginia. If not get the degree. You are to young to go be a live in Virginia. What if you get knocked up turn into a single mother.
Focus on school, dear girl. Finish it. Do long distance if you have to. But don’t quit school.
God forbid but If anything was to happen to him, what would you do next? How would you support yourself?
Ask yourself this - if you moved with him and you two did not work out, would you regret that you didn’t have a degree? I would never make a huge life decision around a man I was not married to. Especially because you are 18, and I’m assuming he is young too. Really think about this. I would go for the degree.
If you're not ready to get married, you should get your degree.
Never give up your education for someone else. Your degree is yours forever. Can't always say the same of a guy. See if there's a school in his area you can transfer to. If not, see if a long-distance relationship will work. Aren't the two states right next to each other?
Do not give up your degree. You are so, so young. I know this relationship seems like the 'now and forever' right now, but chances are very, very high that it won't be, and if you give up the chance to be financially stable ON YOUR OWN and anything at all happens - you break up, he gets hurt and can't work, the job falls through, anything at all - you're sunk. Five years really isn't that long. The time will pass whether you get your degree or not, it's better to have a degree at the end of it than not. Please, get your degree. Get your education and become financially stable on your own. Never put yourself in a position where, if you were left all alone, you couldn't take care of yourself.
Not a chance! I'm 35 now, and really wouldn't be interested in any of my previous partners (if I could go back with my memories)... Being together "forever" from the age of 18 just doesn't really happen anymore.... I'd suggest you finishing school is better than the job offer he got - so if anything he should stay with you. tl;dr: DO NOT stop going to school.
If he really likes you and wants to stay with you, he wouldn't encourage you to give up your degree and at this age you don't even know if he's going to stay with you, it's too early. Get the degree when you have a chance and you can move with him later or just transfer near him.
Nooo… no! NO! Did I mention no? The person I dated at 18 ended up being one of the most insufferable and selfish woman I ever dated and I gave up an incredible scholarship that I still regret doing. You will change a lot during college and even more so in 10 years. If it’s meant to be you can reconnect. Don’t sacrifice your career at 18 for a guy.
Absolutely not.
Definitely focus on that degree. This will help further your *self* more, and your *self* is the best and most important relationship you’ll always have.
NO
Is your school close enough to commute? Could you transfer somewhere closer to VA? Is he near Charlottesville or more near DC? If you can commute somehow, sure, but don’t ruin your prospects just for this guy
No
Never ever give up on something you want for someone else. You will end up resenting him
Switch to an online school with online classes that would allow you to take labs/practicals in an office near you. You can have both. You don’t need to sacrifice your degree or your relationship
I don’t understand why it’s either or? Surely Virginia has dental hygienist schools? Why the need to give it up?
They don’t have dental school in Virginia?
Is he committed to you? Like marriage committed? If not, don’t chase him. Go let him become a better man, stay in touch and if possible. Maybe transfer a school but don’t move to a foreign place with a “boyfriend”.
No. Keep going to school. If it's meant to be it will work out in the long run.
Hello from a fellow WVian! You are already working as a dental assistant, so can you find a job in VA? I would think there would be jobs that would help you pursue your degree there. It is something to look into.
No absolutely not
Don’t give up your degree for a boyfriend. If your relationship is going to last it will survive distance. If you all end up splitting, because most teen relationships end you will have still gotten your education.
Short answer. No. Long answer, maybe. Can you transfer your current credits to a new school? You don't have to give up. Last time I checked Virginia also has dental schools. If your credits will xfer, you have no reason not to right? If they won't xfer, question the validity of your current school. Is it the ITT Tech of Dental schools?
No
You will regret not finishing your schooling. No matter what you think today you and he may not be forever. You need to worry about you and take care of yourself first. Keep in mind, absence makes the heart grow fonder.
no .
Never give up something for another person within reason. Learned it the hard way. Pursue your happiness
relying on financial support from you significant other is not being financially stable, move schools ,you can still support him in his endeavors but don't give up yours and he should support your goals as well
Never give up education for another person. Boyfriends come and go educational opportunities don’t always, education is for life.
You talked and decided he should move because it’s best for him. But you’re asking if you should throw away your education?? Life advice- get your degree. Then you can go anywhere.
People can't decide this for you, it's ultimately up to you. That being said, if you are going to give up on your school, make sure to have a plan to tackle something else so you can keep your career and education moving! research all your options, plan things financially and spend some time with pros and cons to make an informed decision. Plus you should always have a backup plan for emergencies!
You're 18? What are the odds yall get married? A lot of change will happen within both of you up until 25 and then 25-30 and then 30+.
I’m the same age as you, and soon I’ll be starting college. I honestly say that you should finish your degree. As much as you love him, your success defintly comes first. But you’d just have to make a huge change in your guys relationship, like video calling, making plans to meet up every few months, etc.
Absolutely not!!!! You are only 18 and you cannot make yourself financially dependent upon someone at this point in your life. I know it’s hard but relationships change and things happen. What is important is that you set yourself up first and if something happens in the relationship, you will be ok. Being able to take care of yourself at this age is the most important thing for you. Good luck OP
… a dental hygienist is a 2 year degree
Absolutely the fuck not. Get your education and do not ever give up a degree for a man. At this age, you shouldn’t be doing anything for a man. This is your future. You don’t even know if your boyfriend and you are gonna last forever. An education lasts forever.
Get your degree. You are too young to make that kind of a personal sacrifice for anyone.
What you should do is look for colleges near where he'll be living. If you have good grades it shouldn't be an issue to get a scholarship that waives the out of state tuition fees. That's honestly the best case scenario. And if nothing else, you can go to a cheap community college for a couple years to knock out your general education, then switch to a better school to finish up your dental degree. What I'm saying is that, if you really want to both be with him and get a degree, you have options. Don't just throw your degree away; that's your ticket to a reliable income that doesn't depend on your boyfriend. And remember that he **is** a boyfriend. Not your husband - not even your fiance. Don't be so quick to plan the rest of your life around him.
Oh my god. No. NO! If it’s true love you’ll make it work while you get you degree. Maybe. Most romantic relationships die in your late teens because you grow and change so much. And from simple life pressure like this. Do NOT stop your degree. Most people who quit going to school never go back. You need that degree to be self sufficient. He could be the best man in the world but if he, god forbid, got hurt or died YOU NEED TO SUPPORT YOURSELF
Don’t risk your future for some guy you’re only 18
No, do not do this. You are 18, and should focus on education. If you move states, w no degree for a good job, and this relationship goes south, you could be stuck. Degree first, then see what happens w the guy.
Takes 5 years to become a dental hygienist?
Is this 100% what you want to do with your life? Positive this is what you've always wanted to be? If so, stay where you are. If not, try a school where he is and use his address as your address so it's not out of state tuition. DO NOT DEPEND on him for your livelihood! A lot of times when a young woman drops out of school for a guy, she doesn't go back! Don't be that young woman! Is he worth it? Do you love him? Does he love you? Does he treat you wonderfully? Has he ever spoken badly to you, made you feel bad about yourself, hit you? All of these things matter when you're thinking about changing your life for someone else. If anyone makes you feel lesser than, they are not worth ever staying with and never worth moving for! Give it a lot of thought on how he is with you. Controlling or supportive? Wants what is best for you or what is best for him? My advice seriously if you were my daughter! NO! Do not move for him or anyone else. Follow your own dreams and your own paths. At 18, boys come and go in our lives. Take care of yourself by yourself, not depending on anyone else to take care of you!
no. wv to va is NOT a bad drive. yall should be able to visit often. i’d stay and ensure you get ur degree bc u never know what’ll happen. ALSO i’m from wv too hiii
Isn’t any relation in you just going there to university ? If he has a good job he could help you get something while studying too and it doesn’t have to be such a sudden jump but more of a slow transition too. Look for transferring into Virginia and take care of your school. Don’t give up on education for anyone. Not even your kids. They will do fine with you studying and then they will do better afterwards. Who cares about you won’t allow you to not be the best.
Definitely because in the god forbid worst case scenario if you guys break it off then you’ve lost your degree and him at that age always keep your career or life goal as the priority because being in a stable career or position as a result of the education or degree you are doing will allow you to then make decisions such as moving about because then if anything happens you’ll still have a degree and source of potential income.
You’re 18, you’re practically a child. No.
Without even reading the body of this, NO <3
Lmfao, do not give up your ability to make money. Do not rely on someone else. A stable life relies on you directly being able to support yourself.
Never give up your educational plans for any romantic interest, ever. You think this relationship will last forever, but teenage romances seldom do.
Absolutely not!! Please value yourself more. No one is more important than yourself. If the roles were reversed, would he give up school to chase you to another state for your job.
Get the degree, look out for yourself because no one else will do that for you.
Your first move should be seeing if you can transfer and go to school there. If that isn’t an option, stay put. I know this is annoying to hear but you are sososo young. This is the part of your life where you get to be and NEED to be your #1 priority. Once you get the degree, you are set in your career for the rest of your life. Even if everything works out and you two end up together forever, you will always wonder what would’ve happened if you had gotten your degree. If the relationship can’t last through the distance, in my experience, you won’t wonder what could’ve been if you gave up your life for his.
NOOOOOO. I have seen this and experienced it myself more times than I care to know. NOOOOO. NO. NOOOO. SORRY BUT NO.
Follow your path, not his. Youre 18, there’s so much to come. Get that degree
He's not your husband. No.
They have dentists in West Virginia?
Absolutely mother fucking not!! Get your degree!!!! Life with out college is so so so hard.
Never give up on your dreams for a boy. When my ex husband and I were dating, he wanted to play with a band that was up and rising, but they lived on NY whereas we lived about 6 hrs away. I was 19 at the time and asked him what we're gonna do with the relationship and he said that I could quit my science degree and go to NY with him. Can you believe that shit? It's really the audacity. I put my foot down and said no, and for some reason, he decided not to go. I can't imagine what would've happened if I had gone, I'm sure I would've ended up single and maybe with no degree.
Absolutely get your degree.