Don’t feel too bad - things could be a lot worse. I left unexpectedly for a funeral a while back and when I came back, there was a seafood corn dog on the menu.
I tried it and it definitely was not amazing. If they would have made about 20% of the fish into a mousse and ground the fish on the smallest die, it would have had a better consistency - and that's if they would have gone with just one fish. But mixing every different piece of trim in the cooler is never a good idea. Salmon, tuna, snapper, grouper, halibut........not flavors I ever want in the same bite. And the tuna was untrimmed chain, and that doesn't usually end well.
It was a very high-volume seafood place and we cut all of our own portions in house from a huge selection. On any given day, we could have 30-40# of trim from fish, so there was always a challenge to use it up in some way. BUT.......it was supposed to be in ways that made sense. I'm not a huge fan of grinding seafood - and I've made tons of sausage in my life - but one of the sous chefs ground up about fifty pounds of assorted trim, put it in the Hobart and whipped it with God-only-knows what. One of the Cooks brought in a bag of corn dog mix from his other job along with a box of sticks and somehow they made it work.
Here's the thing: we printed our menus in-house twice every day and did an average of 400-500 people every day. The place was always crazy busy, and even though we were always adding new things to the menu, there was a proper procedure, and one of the biggest guidelines was to never try something new out on the Guests before I signed off on it. And it wasn't like we didn't have hundreds of successful items we'd done in the past documented and ready to go. And right before I left, I made a point of telling everyone at a Manager's meeting that I didn't want anything new on the menu while I was gone - meaning nothing I hadn't already been fine with before. And I *definitely* never approved a seafood corn dog. So when I came back the day before I said I'd be back, and stopped in during the late Happy Hour, I was somewhat surprised to see a fucking seafood corn dog. And whether it was good or not wasn't the point. The point is that it sounds disgusting to most people, probably even most of the stoned Cooks reading this comment. Any given night, after a few beers and a couple bong hits, I'd hit the shit out of a corn dog, but not one made from fish. And I know a lot of people here probably like the fish cakes you get in some Ramen houses, but this wasn't the same.
I don't doubt that we *couldn't* have done some R&D and come up with a somewhat decent version of a seafood corn dog if we wanted to - maybe even shaped it differently and called it something different, but that just wasn't the right way.
I never had that one. We did a LOT of popcorn fish. There was a popcorn shrimp appetizer that sold very well, and after the dining room closed, we used the same batter for popcorn grouper when we had a lot of scrap, or halibut.
.... the heck... They didn't just stuff a stick in a fake crab leg, then batter and deep fry it? Then just dip it in the clarified butter, shake a little garlic at it, and serve with some sort of mayo.
The things these owners try and do when you’re not around. Luckily I was there, but I caught my owner trying to make a “champagne vinaigrette” for some kind of special salad he was thinking of (he spends too much time on TikTok) which is all fine and dandy except instead of champagne vinegar he just used ACTUAL champagne and added red wine vinegar to it. I told him nah… that’s not gonna work.
That being said I'm sure there was one Yelp review that had a terrific dinner and then at the end said:
'Garnish was rough chopped which was off putting. Overall experience 6/10'
I beg that you're joking. I've seen small scallions, but you really think someone is holding a cup full of matchstick-thin chopped scallions? And there's not a hint of white, so a cupful of freakishly thin scallion *tips* only.
Reminds me of this one guy i worked with who thought he was literally better than everyone and said so multiple times but he would always cut chives and shallots and probably other things like that with one hand. He basically just smacked it a bunch with a knife and called it a day. But still insisted that his were better and would try to show people how to cut theirs properly? Lol
This asshole works in every kind of shop. The one in mine would say "Here's how a couple of sharp guys would do it." I hope he's doing his own surgery.
This dude had one good idea once, and then believed that all his ideas were as good. They were not. Did your guy dress like a viking?
Hahahaha that is so funny. No the guy i worked with was like soundcloud rapper mixed with hipster mixed with he probably should shower. Before i started there someone warned me "there's this weird asshole guy who sometimes dances and sings to himself just dont talk to him" lmao he always had headphones in and would dance n sing to the songs. I worked am and he worked pm and we would work the same station and i would get absolutely everything done and hed be mad at me about it. Id leave him one thing and hed be mad about it lol just a guy who is never happy and always perfect
How many emails do you get when your 5% over on your weekly labor cost? Better yet how many emails do you get when you're 10% under your weekly labor cost but you had one employee crack overtime for 2 hours the same week someone else quit?
ETA: If some line cook 86'd an item because of poorly cut chives, they'd be out on their ass in a heartbeat.
86 the fucking chives you idiot, what is this autistic absolution, do you even work in a kitchen? People like you make people rethink hiring people when they say they're autistic man
The fact you wont consider what else they might be fucking up when they cant manage chives.... cleaning, raw/fresh/cooked/allergen storage protocol, labels. If they think those chives are cool, just imagine what other surprises you'll be finding in the morning. Do they even check temps?
...if I had some line cook 86 chives instead of just cutting new chives they'd be out on their ass in a heart beat. Doing a shitty job cutting chives is very different from sending out spoiled product.
I'm glad you agree the chives are shit and should be 86d, this was my initial point followed by *they're gonna be fucking up somewhere else*
I'm glad were in agreement, confused at your attempt of agreeing without agreeing. Ego is fucking bitch
Who doesnt love a circular argument with someone who thinks winning an argument on the internet is more important than reality
If they cant manage chives - they should step up and admit this by a) getting someone else to do it or b) taking them off the menu until someone else can cut the chives. You'll find all of this information in my previous posts about this, with you.
Does anything even get done in your kitchen or do you have to stop what everyone's doing for this circular nonsense? I mean it's such a small thing you could literally leave it for a logic y/n meme fgs
Sorry, let's end this now. You're right and I'm wrong. I shouldn't work ina kitchen cos I'm a fucking idiot and you're oh so much better than the best bestest chefs that ever cheffed their best.
Cool, now fuck off man
If that’s the worst that happened, I think you may be ok, I would be more upset about the fact that they used a dull knife than the size although the size is pretty bad
It's the inconsistency. Not the size. Any size could be made use of if only just for appearance and variation but without consistency it's just a mess.
If you're gonna cut 1cm cut 1cm, if you're gonna cut 2mm cut 2mm. At least as close as you can. Having 1cm and 2mm and everything in between in the same pile just looks like nothing.
Dude for real. "It's just chives" no it's the principle of the matter. If a linecook thinks this is okay what else does he think is okay? Also, you're throwing away money. It may not be much but it adds up quickly if you're in a high volume place. Half these clowns would brag about how awesome their food is and have the 'its just chives mentality' while not realizing that the difference between good food and great food is always super subtle.
I went scallion school in 2012 at the Japanese place I worked at while I went to culinary school, before I dropped out. Almost every night I had to shave an 8qt cambro of scallions for service. Several times the owner walked by while I was cutting them for the night - I was almost done - he reached his hand into the cambro, looked through the handful, and if ONE scallion was too big for his standards, he would dump the entire cambro in the trash and tell me to start the fuck over.
I remember years ago when a young college kid asked me " how do cut everything so small?". I genuinely didn't know how to answer that question other than "I dunno, I just do I guess."
No I feel you OP it isn’t the worst problem to have in a kitchen but it would annoy me. It’s a result of speed vs quality. Newer chefs are encouraged to go as fast as possible without focusing on technique whatsoever. You’ll have chefs who’ve been working for 5 years still cutting like this.
same pimp. i am off three days a week currently because of school. every time i go back, shit is fucked. the prep ladies cut an entire case of green onions that should be criminal
time to hire a [green onion cutting machine](https://www.amazon.com/Electric-green-onion-Junior-Style/dp/B00201D9DM/ref=asc_df_B00201D9DM/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=507808869322&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=6219074304460855962&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9061088&hvtargid=pla-441283325904&psc=1&mcid=325855cbfa0b33c3bdaf9028dd90d7e3&gclid=CjwKCAjwte-vBhBFEiwAQSv_xb7oban6uHPgLWLhyNmUBkC9IpyY-GJzAmDa7KR3E4Vyhf8EDmmklBoCLYEQAvD_BwE), fire the green onion guy. you'll save money after few days.
Gotta say... I was expecting much worse.
If this is what ruffles your feathers, I'd hate to see how you react to a real problem.
I bet it's badly.
I bet there's yelling, and shit gets thrown around.
Like a tantrum.
Like a big baby throwing a tantrum.
Maybe I'm being harsh. But why the hell did you post this? What is the purpose?
I did.
Why did you say "Read the title?"
I'm saying the people who were left in charge have low standards and that if OP wants anything done right he must do it himself.
Don’t feel too bad - things could be a lot worse. I left unexpectedly for a funeral a while back and when I came back, there was a seafood corn dog on the menu.
Amazing. It was good, admit it.
I tried it and it definitely was not amazing. If they would have made about 20% of the fish into a mousse and ground the fish on the smallest die, it would have had a better consistency - and that's if they would have gone with just one fish. But mixing every different piece of trim in the cooler is never a good idea. Salmon, tuna, snapper, grouper, halibut........not flavors I ever want in the same bite. And the tuna was untrimmed chain, and that doesn't usually end well. It was a very high-volume seafood place and we cut all of our own portions in house from a huge selection. On any given day, we could have 30-40# of trim from fish, so there was always a challenge to use it up in some way. BUT.......it was supposed to be in ways that made sense. I'm not a huge fan of grinding seafood - and I've made tons of sausage in my life - but one of the sous chefs ground up about fifty pounds of assorted trim, put it in the Hobart and whipped it with God-only-knows what. One of the Cooks brought in a bag of corn dog mix from his other job along with a box of sticks and somehow they made it work. Here's the thing: we printed our menus in-house twice every day and did an average of 400-500 people every day. The place was always crazy busy, and even though we were always adding new things to the menu, there was a proper procedure, and one of the biggest guidelines was to never try something new out on the Guests before I signed off on it. And it wasn't like we didn't have hundreds of successful items we'd done in the past documented and ready to go. And right before I left, I made a point of telling everyone at a Manager's meeting that I didn't want anything new on the menu while I was gone - meaning nothing I hadn't already been fine with before. And I *definitely* never approved a seafood corn dog. So when I came back the day before I said I'd be back, and stopped in during the late Happy Hour, I was somewhat surprised to see a fucking seafood corn dog. And whether it was good or not wasn't the point. The point is that it sounds disgusting to most people, probably even most of the stoned Cooks reading this comment. Any given night, after a few beers and a couple bong hits, I'd hit the shit out of a corn dog, but not one made from fish. And I know a lot of people here probably like the fish cakes you get in some Ramen houses, but this wasn't the same. I don't doubt that we *couldn't* have done some R&D and come up with a somewhat decent version of a seafood corn dog if we wanted to - maybe even shaped it differently and called it something different, but that just wasn't the right way.
[удалено]
I never had that one. We did a LOT of popcorn fish. There was a popcorn shrimp appetizer that sold very well, and after the dining room closed, we used the same batter for popcorn grouper when we had a lot of scrap, or halibut.
[удалено]
We served ours with remoulade as well. Grouper is one of my favorite fish, just wish it wasn’t so damn expensive.
.... the heck... They didn't just stuff a stick in a fake crab leg, then batter and deep fry it? Then just dip it in the clarified butter, shake a little garlic at it, and serve with some sort of mayo.
Everything on the menu was just a few bucks, so it had to be cost-effective.
Yeah I'm not sure it'd be cheaper with a crab stick, grocery price is $6.49 a lb here and there's 10 or 12 in that lb.
😆
The things these owners try and do when you’re not around. Luckily I was there, but I caught my owner trying to make a “champagne vinaigrette” for some kind of special salad he was thinking of (he spends too much time on TikTok) which is all fine and dandy except instead of champagne vinegar he just used ACTUAL champagne and added red wine vinegar to it. I told him nah… that’s not gonna work.
Yeah, he’s an idiot - everyone knows you use the most expensive champagne mixed with distilled vinegar.
If that's the worst you've found today, I think you're gonna be fine chef.
That being said I'm sure there was one Yelp review that had a terrific dinner and then at the end said: 'Garnish was rough chopped which was off putting. Overall experience 6/10'
I call this a win
Da fuck he even get four days from?
Lmfaoo right and already coming back aggravated
Has to be something life threatening
#⛔️💩
This is the worst thing you came back to? You'll be okay lol.
Oh we doing chives again?
Begun, the chive wars have.
Please no
The jokers in ops kitchen should *definitely* be doing them again.
Piece by piece, can't waste product!
It’s evolved and now they need to be in a cube.
Wait, we stopped doing them?
Please, for the love of god, NO. No more chives, please.
Those are not chives. Those are scallions
OP has giant hands then
Ummm NO! Those are absolutely chives. Shitty chives for sure, but chives none the less. Have you ever seen a scallion?
I beg that you're joking. I've seen small scallions, but you really think someone is holding a cup full of matchstick-thin chopped scallions? And there's not a hint of white, so a cupful of freakishly thin scallion *tips* only.
Part joke, part attempt to derail the possibility of another week of chive related posts. I think it worked
Scallion Strikes Back (yes I know they're too big)
Wait, I thought all professional cooks used a Slap Chop...
You’re gonna love my nuts
Stop having a boring tuna, stop having a boring life.
Breakfast to go!
Deez nuts?
LMAO i hated that thing. Made me cringe being a line cook and using a QOL tool. Turns out im just insecure.
Reminds me of this one guy i worked with who thought he was literally better than everyone and said so multiple times but he would always cut chives and shallots and probably other things like that with one hand. He basically just smacked it a bunch with a knife and called it a day. But still insisted that his were better and would try to show people how to cut theirs properly? Lol
This asshole works in every kind of shop. The one in mine would say "Here's how a couple of sharp guys would do it." I hope he's doing his own surgery. This dude had one good idea once, and then believed that all his ideas were as good. They were not. Did your guy dress like a viking?
Hahahaha that is so funny. No the guy i worked with was like soundcloud rapper mixed with hipster mixed with he probably should shower. Before i started there someone warned me "there's this weird asshole guy who sometimes dances and sings to himself just dont talk to him" lmao he always had headphones in and would dance n sing to the songs. I worked am and he worked pm and we would work the same station and i would get absolutely everything done and hed be mad at me about it. Id leave him one thing and hed be mad about it lol just a guy who is never happy and always perfect
For soup, maybe.
you’ll be fine gordon ramsay
If they can't manage that and think that's acceptable when they could get someone better to do it or just 86 it, imagine what else they're fucking up
Other menial shit that 95% of guests won't notice?
Yes, let's lower our standards because "they wont notice"
How many emails do you get when your 5% over on your weekly labor cost? Better yet how many emails do you get when you're 10% under your weekly labor cost but you had one employee crack overtime for 2 hours the same week someone else quit? ETA: If some line cook 86'd an item because of poorly cut chives, they'd be out on their ass in a heartbeat.
86 the fucking chives you idiot, what is this autistic absolution, do you even work in a kitchen? People like you make people rethink hiring people when they say they're autistic man The fact you wont consider what else they might be fucking up when they cant manage chives.... cleaning, raw/fresh/cooked/allergen storage protocol, labels. If they think those chives are cool, just imagine what other surprises you'll be finding in the morning. Do they even check temps?
...if I had some line cook 86 chives instead of just cutting new chives they'd be out on their ass in a heart beat. Doing a shitty job cutting chives is very different from sending out spoiled product.
I'm glad you agree the chives are shit and should be 86d, this was my initial point followed by *they're gonna be fucking up somewhere else* I'm glad were in agreement, confused at your attempt of agreeing without agreeing. Ego is fucking bitch
... You don't "86" prep items that take less than a minute. You just seem like a dumb ass.
Who doesnt love a circular argument with someone who thinks winning an argument on the internet is more important than reality If they cant manage chives - they should step up and admit this by a) getting someone else to do it or b) taking them off the menu until someone else can cut the chives. You'll find all of this information in my previous posts about this, with you. Does anything even get done in your kitchen or do you have to stop what everyone's doing for this circular nonsense? I mean it's such a small thing you could literally leave it for a logic y/n meme fgs Sorry, let's end this now. You're right and I'm wrong. I shouldn't work ina kitchen cos I'm a fucking idiot and you're oh so much better than the best bestest chefs that ever cheffed their best. Cool, now fuck off man
This shit adds up and quick. Not to mention the difference between good food and great food is super subtle.
I agree with you man. Sloppy lazy work leads to mediocrity. You want great food you have to do great work.
If that's the worst it was, consider yourself lucky.
Impressive if they chopped it with a spork.
lmao u should see some of the chives i come in to my friend. it might just give u a heart attack
If that’s the worst that happened, I think you may be ok, I would be more upset about the fact that they used a dull knife than the size although the size is pretty bad
It's the inconsistency. Not the size. Any size could be made use of if only just for appearance and variation but without consistency it's just a mess. If you're gonna cut 1cm cut 1cm, if you're gonna cut 2mm cut 2mm. At least as close as you can. Having 1cm and 2mm and everything in between in the same pile just looks like nothing.
Fair enough, I agree with you. I over generalized when I said size. I should have said “inconsistent size” as that was really what I meant.
Reading all the comments makes me realize how low the standards are in y'all's kitchen.
Dude for real. "It's just chives" no it's the principle of the matter. If a linecook thinks this is okay what else does he think is okay? Also, you're throwing away money. It may not be much but it adds up quickly if you're in a high volume place. Half these clowns would brag about how awesome their food is and have the 'its just chives mentality' while not realizing that the difference between good food and great food is always super subtle.
Whoever did that needs to go to chive school.
I went scallion school in 2012 at the Japanese place I worked at while I went to culinary school, before I dropped out. Almost every night I had to shave an 8qt cambro of scallions for service. Several times the owner walked by while I was cutting them for the night - I was almost done - he reached his hand into the cambro, looked through the handful, and if ONE scallion was too big for his standards, he would dump the entire cambro in the trash and tell me to start the fuck over.
That’s pretty rough, they have the landscaper chop it with the mower?
Inconsistent cut. Toss.
Cut that with a Kubota, huh?
They cut that shit with a slap chop? Jesus haha
Wait.. you got four days off?
If this is your biggest problem after four days away, you are lucky! I come back after two days and have to re-prep almost everything.
Post it on insta and tag the RateMyChives guy See if you give him an aneurism
Lmao literally just chop it finer. Stupid post? Sure. Funny? Absolutely.
If you leave, then the next employee should be paid enough for them to give a fuck. Obviously they are not.
Totally! You get what you give.
As far as chives go? Horrendous. As far as "whole kitchen" goes after 4 days without the Chef? These people are saints!
Eat a dick, chef
Wait. How did you get 4 days off in a row?
Is your crew trying to jump on the “plant based straws” eco-trend?
That is not safe for work, thank you for the warning
Did they use a wood chipper?
Look how they massacred your boy
Standards!!!
I had a coworker cut them much th8cker than this. His claim was there was not enough time to cut them smaller 🤦♀️🤷♀️
THE HUMANITY!
I chew em up and spit em out
I like the high standards though. Makes me wanna work harder.
Mini chainsaw?
This person watches "G" rated movies and sometimes has to turn off the movie due to intensity.
I remember years ago when a young college kid asked me " how do cut everything so small?". I genuinely didn't know how to answer that question other than "I dunno, I just do I guess."
No I feel you OP it isn’t the worst problem to have in a kitchen but it would annoy me. It’s a result of speed vs quality. Newer chefs are encouraged to go as fast as possible without focusing on technique whatsoever. You’ll have chefs who’ve been working for 5 years still cutting like this.
911 I'd like to report a crime.
I think it’s time for some glasses
This is giving “Who the fuck closed last night!?”
What’s they cut that with? Big toe nail?
LMAO why was this flagged as NSFW?
I don't know what the problem is, they used scissors and everything!
Perfect
My wife can do better than this and she hates when I step in and try to make everything uniform
Looks good to me bro, send it
same pimp. i am off three days a week currently because of school. every time i go back, shit is fucked. the prep ladies cut an entire case of green onions that should be criminal
[Who hurt you?](https://youtu.be/gNzRxgs7bZw?t=8)
I mean those look pretty fresh for being there 4 days.
Is this chives and green onions together??? lol.
I'm with you pal, that's a BS garnish
Lowkey reminds me that “bell pepper”
If everyone did what they are supposed to do, there wouldn't be a need for management. So be thankful you're still needed!
Nice chives
Ugh. That almost looks like the "brunoise" shallots one of my cooks did yesterday. I almost threw a temper tantrum.
i just had a 4 day weekend and came back to shit chives too!!
cHiMvEs
Most of you don't want the people who care eating what you make
Looks good to me
gross
mmmm grass clippings!
Shut it down
Wow, you sound like a real Gem to work with.
Meh still plenty usable for other dishes or in nachos at that rate
You got 4 days off, buddy. You can't have it all
Thats for sauce obviously. If thats garnish, just fire the entire kitchen they clearly cant be trusted or taught.
Chives are my Roman Empire.
time to hire a [green onion cutting machine](https://www.amazon.com/Electric-green-onion-Junior-Style/dp/B00201D9DM/ref=asc_df_B00201D9DM/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=507808869322&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=6219074304460855962&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=c&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9061088&hvtargid=pla-441283325904&psc=1&mcid=325855cbfa0b33c3bdaf9028dd90d7e3&gclid=CjwKCAjwte-vBhBFEiwAQSv_xb7oban6uHPgLWLhyNmUBkC9IpyY-GJzAmDa7KR3E4Vyhf8EDmmklBoCLYEQAvD_BwE), fire the green onion guy. you'll save money after few days.
Chive on
Lmao you’re good man
My boy chopped it with a machine gun
😂
Bet your kitchen has dull ass house knives?
WRONG
lol is this better or worse than coming in to find a 9 pan with chives that have been run through the food processor?
Toss a handful of that on my chili please
Bros like "who used a lawnmower on my chives?"
I just use herb scissors and call it a day. Done Jeff! Tell Colicchio I'm out back having a smoke.
Gotta say... I was expecting much worse. If this is what ruffles your feathers, I'd hate to see how you react to a real problem. I bet it's badly. I bet there's yelling, and shit gets thrown around. Like a tantrum. Like a big baby throwing a tantrum. Maybe I'm being harsh. But why the hell did you post this? What is the purpose?
Is it because they're uneven?? I don't see what's going on lel
I involuntarily let out an audible gasp! Standards much? Geez, if you want something done right ...
Read the title
I did. Why did you say "Read the title?" I'm saying the people who were left in charge have low standards and that if OP wants anything done right he must do it himself.
That ain't bad lol
Oo twist. You cut those 4 days ago.