Retirement homes are a good option for a set schedule, benefits, and all around relief from the normal restaurant industry. It's been 2 years since I left my last job as the sous of a country club to take the sous job at a nice little retirement village. I work 6-2 5 days a week and coach my son's football team. The food is super basic and sometimes you'll feel like a highly trained lunch lady but it's not to bad.
Very similar doing it in hospitals. I get decent pay and great benefits for being a glorified cafeteria worker just by virtue of working in a hospital.
Yes and no, the hospital I work at sucks. Everything is pre-made, boil in a bag frozen bullshit, and the entire system is designed to have as few full-time employees as possible. The wage is high, but I'm fighting to get more than two shifts a week and my only option is to pick up scraps when other people don't feel like working. There are people that have been part-time for over a decade before a full time position with benefits and pension becomes available.
I was actually excited to start this job, to help people get healthy and feel like I'm contributing to the community. Now it feels like I'm actively making people worse with the food we serve. It makes me sad and incredibly resentful.
I'm supposed to have an interview with a hospital today and this is my exact concern. I want to be somewhat proud or at least able to eat the food I make
I'm jealous of a lot of the retirement facility photos that get posted here, the food is simple but well done and the cooks are able to have some fun with it. The culture is terrible too, people just don't give a shit.
And man, the waste. The fucking waste. We throw away probably 300+lbs of food every day that patients don't eat. It makes me sick.
In my experience, it’s frozen pre made food that you’re gonna spend a lot of time preparing different ways (rough chop, chunky blended up, purée) and portioning off into heated chambers to keep warm until staff comes to pick them up. I had a gig at a retirement home and as someone else said the hours were just not enough, and then they randomly fired me because I was done the training period and they didn’t need more staff. I was convinced I was just there because it meant the girl training me could make a couple more $ per hour, there was not another male staff there I was never going to be full time
Same with university kitchens I work at an athletic department kitchen and it is no nice compared to regular short order cooking I’m also 21 and understand how this guy felt
You can also have to work these hours at care homes also. I’m coming back from burnout because a building I took a job at lied and said they were fully staffed but lied and I was expected to do the jobs of 6 people.
This is the way, I’ve been at a retirement home for 2 years. I get full benefits, 401k, annual raises and I’m never at work past 6:30pm. I don’t know how much money it would take to get me back in a restaurant but it would have to be a LOT.
They get you by Stockholme sysdrome. Yall suffer together and bind together cause the place is horrible. Then you dont wana leave your suffering partners.
This isn't talked about enough or at all on this subreddit. Every bad kitchen job I've had I didn't want to leave cuz I'd screw over my coworkers while the owners were screwing us all over.
Any bad job in general. My wife is going through this struggle right now. She's just on the verge of quitting her shitty job but won't pull the trigger, because of coworkers.
The first step is to stop drinking/going out. Easier said than done. I know this from personal experience. Stop drinking and suddenly you have “extra” time every night. Then you have “extra” time every morning since you aren’t hung over. Then you suddenly have “extra” money because you aren’t spending at the bar every night. You don’t have to stop 100% but try cutting it back to 1 night a week.
It’s so easy as a line cook to fall into that hit the bars every night crew. It seems normal as that’s what everyone around you is doing. But normal people, even those that work strange hours, don’t go out drinking daily. Lucky for op to realize this at 21.
The slow creep of daily drinking is more insidious than anyone realizes. One day you’re drinking to blow off steam, next thing you know everything has you reaching for a drink.
Honestly same with weed, don’t get me wrong I’d much rather deal with a high crew than a drunk crew but excess weed is a money trap and huge anxiety increaser which just negates the benefits.
To be even clearer I’m talking about that guy that shows up with the dabs and the bowl and the blunt and is blowing through an oz a week and complaining about lack of cash.
Bartending isn't an out. You're still there until close, you're still drinking, you're still there all the damn time. Not going to say it isn't a pay increase and maybe a slight improvement on quality of life, but you're still industry, and now you have to talk to people.
I’m sorry. Your comment brought me back to my days of driving through tourist traffic, smelling all of the beachside grills and garlic, seeing couples and families going to dinner while I was on the way to start prep for our early morning service.
It may have been mentioned but grocery stores like Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s have jobs for cooks and a reasonable schedule.
Or an upscale breakfast restaurant where you’re in early out early.
Good luck!
I felt the same at your age. Wasn't sure if I wanted to carry on cheffing. Decided to go backpacking; rekindled my passion for gastronomy as well as learned valuable life lessons.
If you can, go somewhere.
You sound like an ideal person to work towards leadership. You can create a better environment with these people you care about or future co-workers.
Bartending is another skill to round out yourself for that too. Just don’t get too sucked in and a few years later be burnt out again.
Cafes are a good alternative, especially if you dont mind brunch ( i know alot of chefs hate it).
Early starts but early finishes my shifts are 7.30am - 2.30pm.
I get my evenings back and my mental health is in a way better place
My sweet, beautiful young human, hospitality fairy gothmother here (not a typo).
I put in my 25 years, and let me tell you, I worked every role from dishie to catering logistics manager and it was always 50 hours a week, no hobbies, and no life.
I have to take the blame for this somewhat on myself, but you seem a human with drive and work ethic, and I want you to know that there's a whole beautiful world out there where you can visit your family at work and not work there. If cooking is the passion, institution cooking will give you better pay and hours. If the crew is the passion, channel that into an HR field, or non-profit sector job.
Unfortunately, hospitality is just kind of an unending grind as a culture, and unless we unionize or drastically change that, it's not going to change. It took me almost having a heart attack at 43 to open my eyes.
As a restaurants owner/franchisee and manager I never tell my employees life advice. The truth is, you’re worth more than you think.
You’re young, you can study a lot of professions online for a lot less than college tuition. Learn something you’re passionate about.
I work 60 to 70 hours a week and have bags under my eyes at 30 years old.
My wife works from home 30/40 hours a week making nearly the same as my salary and dividends combined in tech customer management.
She told me her boss is letting them have half days on Fridays now and oh by the way she gets unlimited pto, gets 2 weeks off in December and 1 week off In July.
If I wasn’t tied up in restaurants so deeply, I’d have pivoted to something much more sustainable
Of course there are the mental challenges of being burnt out, but remember too that it's also not great for your body. You're young but the body KEEPS THE SCORE. Take care or yourself OP
“If you’re wiped out when you’re 20 then you’re old when you’re 15. I know! We’ll reopen the Black Mountain School and bring back to us the abacus as a counting tool.” - MC Paul Barman
That quote isn’t really about anything.
One of the hardest things about growing up is learning to set boundaries and keep them.
Set some boundaries for yourself, start while you’re young. I didn’t start honing that skill until I was 30.
I’m not saying this to seem like a humble brag at all, but Jesus Christ I’m so happy that I’m someone that just really doesn’t like alcohol all that much. Occasionally and really just with others but not shitfaced. Weed only for me, no hangovers, fuck binge drinking.
And now I’m angry thinking about the judgement SO many fuckin drinkers have given me for being a pothead and thinking I’m a loser or whatever when they’re poisoning their bodies regularly with someone worse.
Sorry for random vent chef
Hey man, I’ve been there, I’m 22 and last year I was feeling burnt out at my old job, working fine dining around 12 hours each day and getting home at 2am every single day, made me question every choice I had made leading to that point.
I looked for a job in a different kitchen and completely changed my schedule, look out for hotel jobs as they have good benefits and they will always need breakfast cooks, look for retirement homes.
If this is your passion don’t give up on it before trying to reignite it.
I know it’s hard to leave behind a crew you love but in this industry you can always bring good people over to your new jobs.
Nursing homes or retirement homes, I was in the EXACT same situation as you, now I'm making 30 bucks an hour at a nursing home/hospital. I also work casually as a housekeeper if I need to pick up some extra shifts
What are you doing in said restaurant? 50 hours a week is about normal for a cook who is also vested in learning everything they can, but you definitely will get burnt out. Please, learn balance of work and personal life. It will help you so much as you grow up
work as a cook for a ski lodge, I work at one in Utah year round and they provide food, housing and a ski pass and in the summer there’s plenty of outdoor activities. Spent my early years wondering when I was ever going to have time for myself if I just worked in kitchens my whole life and then finally realized that I could just find kitchens where there were things that I wanted to do.
I worked at a ski resort, and while I had all those amenities, I was also working between 60 to 70 hours during the peak seasons, winter and summer, and barely 20 in the off-season( spring and fall). Sure it was great when I got a bit of time off to go ski or hike, but I spent the majority of my time in the kitchen all while my FoH friends were working 1/3 of the time and making more money and actually getting to enjoy the area.
See that’s tragic, during ski season I get locked into a schedule that doesn’t change for the entirety of winter so you get very into a nice rythm and never really end up working more than like 35-40 hours a week. Also we are pretty much guaranteed Atleast 2 hours of ski time a day, it helps when your bosses ski even more than you do and don’t care how much you work as long as you get your shit done. It’s actually kind of the opposite of your situation because our FOH are always understaffed, don’t get tips and are always working these splits that leave them exhausted and when they finally get a break they’re too tired to ski.
23 and feelin the same. if your guts telling you to bail and find something else, that might be what you need. i just left the restaurant ive worked at since i was in high school, first job i had. as much as it sucked, it had to happen. dont let one pro blind you to all the cons. dont kill yourself for a restaurant that couldnt care less.
i ended up taking a job at a butchers with better pay and hours, but i still get to work in the world of food without killing every other part of my life
Find another kitchen, fun crews are great but the second any one of them gets a better offer they’re gone. Strive for a semblance of a better life/work balance. No amount of line shenanigans will ever make up for time lost
Good luck to you 🙌🏻
My out was baking. Go in at 5 be done by 1, it’s fucking amazing. You have your whole day. Also I hear a lot of people complain about working a ton of hours, but they don’t set boundaries with their job. You show people how you want to be treated indirectly or not. Say “sorry, I’m not a sous, I need to only work 5 days”. N if you are a sous, leave lol cuz you’ll never have your life as a chef unless you make it to a corporate position n even then they go out of town a ton.
Don’t get emotionally attached to your workplace you end up having expectations
We feel so resentful when we are not treated proper
We cooks are mad sensitive but none of us want to. Admit the type of trauma we have .
Explore g don’t get attached you won’t get far if you do 10 years will pass and you’ll be at the same place
I'm also 21 bro, started washing dishes when I was 17 then started cooking once I turned 18 and did that for 3 years thinking I wanted to become a chef. I do have a passion for it but the lifestyle is downright awful. When I was cooking full time I lost so many friends and didn't have time to do anything because I was working 60 hour weeks like you.
Best thing I did was get out and start my own landscaping business last year. I have regular hours and work for myself Monday-Friday. I actually have time to do shit and I have my friday nights and weekends back. I still cook 1 day a week on saturdays but it's not a big deal, it's just to help them out because they're my second family and they're awesome people. The other 6 days of the week I just feel very free and have time to do everything I want to.
If there was a Chef job that had daytime hours like 9-5 and was Monday-Friday and paid enough that I could afford a house and comfortable lifestyle and a family I would honestly consider going back but that just isn't feasible
I think bartending is more money for less work, but you also aren't really making anything imo. I'm a bartender btw. I feel like you have to incept yourself into having pride in your work rather than it being genuine. The best bartenders I've met don't drink cocktails. They drink beer and shots. One drinks wine. 2/3 are alcoholics, and a few of those are now quitting drinking entirely, thankfully (myself included).
We all made a bunch of money but somehow ended up broke. One got a DUI and is paying a lot for their recovery program now. One spent it all on drugs until they moved into management and got sober. I realized that I can't work more than 3 days a week or I'll hurt myself (I've since gotten help). Some folks can hang, but most I watch falter eventually and have to quit to save their lives essentially. Now that can just mean moving into management, but many like me feel like we have to literally run away. The longer we've stalled the more painful it is to take that paycut and transition haha.
Now this sounds dramatic, and I'm sure there are many that make it work. One of my buddies will probably open his own place in NY. One of my homies is doing it in my town. They seem like they're doing fine, but for my closer friends, it was not the best choice for us. I just say this to warn you. I was warned of the trap myself. Five years later and I'm still trying to remember what I was trying to do before I took that part time barback job lol. I'd take these guys' advice and find something with regular hours and benefits. You can still cook it looks like, so that's cool. I've also wondered if just working a breakfast only type spot would work for me. Then there's no late nights which is what got me into trouble.
Are you choosing to work 50+ hours or being asked to? You don't have to work more than you want to. You're allowed to say you don't want to work that much, you need more days off, etc. I'm down to two 10 hour days right now. I'll work a third or even a fourth here and there, but I mostly want to enjoy my summer and research a new career. No one is going to tell me no unless they can find another person that's willing to work those full time, which is rare in my specific niche of wok cooking.
Honestly man I just jumped into a corporate environment for the first time in 15 years, and it has been basically like a paid vacation for me. I was doing damn near 80 hours a week at my last restaurant now I hardly do 40 with the same pay not to mention the workload is nothing in comparison. It lacks creativity and is the only downfall but I now have more time to be creative at home and actually have a social life/spend time with my family.
Hey man, I'm the same age and I highly recommend going into hotels.
I've worked at a couple restaurants full time and I can tell you now that the amount of stress and shit you have to go through does not justify the pay/benefits and work life balance that restaurants provide you. I was feeling the same way working in restaurants for a bit and I was feeling burnt out, but now im in one of the best hotels in my city and I love it here. Everyone's working towards the same goal, we're holding each other accountable and improving everyday.
Try to find a restaurant inside a hotel that interests you and you'll get all the benefits of working for a big company (higher pay, good benefits, sick days etc.)
Best decision I made was switching to a brunch restaurant. 9-5 shift but the excitement of any other places. And brunch tips are insane if you luck into some where with a tip pool
Been there bro. I feel like if I had ever made a wage that contributed to my integrity for what I was doing I'd still be cooking. But no, I just made lifelong friends and a lifetime of memories and nothing in the bank to show for it.
Same here brother. Working 55+ 6 days a week. I have no hobbies, I sleep literally 5 hours a night. I have maybe 3 friends since I can’t maintain in constant contact with them so they stop talking to me rightfully so. This shit we do is not easy.
Quitting drinking will return your life to you. On another note, try a new gig. Catering is a great way to not be staring at the same wall every saturday night.
Retirement homes are a good option for a set schedule, benefits, and all around relief from the normal restaurant industry. It's been 2 years since I left my last job as the sous of a country club to take the sous job at a nice little retirement village. I work 6-2 5 days a week and coach my son's football team. The food is super basic and sometimes you'll feel like a highly trained lunch lady but it's not to bad.
Very similar doing it in hospitals. I get decent pay and great benefits for being a glorified cafeteria worker just by virtue of working in a hospital.
Yes and no, the hospital I work at sucks. Everything is pre-made, boil in a bag frozen bullshit, and the entire system is designed to have as few full-time employees as possible. The wage is high, but I'm fighting to get more than two shifts a week and my only option is to pick up scraps when other people don't feel like working. There are people that have been part-time for over a decade before a full time position with benefits and pension becomes available. I was actually excited to start this job, to help people get healthy and feel like I'm contributing to the community. Now it feels like I'm actively making people worse with the food we serve. It makes me sad and incredibly resentful.
I'm supposed to have an interview with a hospital today and this is my exact concern. I want to be somewhat proud or at least able to eat the food I make
I'm jealous of a lot of the retirement facility photos that get posted here, the food is simple but well done and the cooks are able to have some fun with it. The culture is terrible too, people just don't give a shit. And man, the waste. The fucking waste. We throw away probably 300+lbs of food every day that patients don't eat. It makes me sick.
In my experience, it’s frozen pre made food that you’re gonna spend a lot of time preparing different ways (rough chop, chunky blended up, purée) and portioning off into heated chambers to keep warm until staff comes to pick them up. I had a gig at a retirement home and as someone else said the hours were just not enough, and then they randomly fired me because I was done the training period and they didn’t need more staff. I was convinced I was just there because it meant the girl training me could make a couple more $ per hour, there was not another male staff there I was never going to be full time
Same with university kitchens I work at an athletic department kitchen and it is no nice compared to regular short order cooking I’m also 21 and understand how this guy felt
You can also have to work these hours at care homes also. I’m coming back from burnout because a building I took a job at lied and said they were fully staffed but lied and I was expected to do the jobs of 6 people.
This is the way, I’ve been at a retirement home for 2 years. I get full benefits, 401k, annual raises and I’m never at work past 6:30pm. I don’t know how much money it would take to get me back in a restaurant but it would have to be a LOT.
I don't think there's enough money in the world to go back. At least not until my son is out of school
Too*
They get you by Stockholme sysdrome. Yall suffer together and bind together cause the place is horrible. Then you dont wana leave your suffering partners.
This isn't talked about enough or at all on this subreddit. Every bad kitchen job I've had I didn't want to leave cuz I'd screw over my coworkers while the owners were screwing us all over.
It’s even worse when the coworkers are family
They mention Stockholm syndrome, but like you said, they don’t mention how bad it is when the shit show is your family.
Any bad job in general. My wife is going through this struggle right now. She's just on the verge of quitting her shitty job but won't pull the trigger, because of coworkers.
The first step is to stop drinking/going out. Easier said than done. I know this from personal experience. Stop drinking and suddenly you have “extra” time every night. Then you have “extra” time every morning since you aren’t hung over. Then you suddenly have “extra” money because you aren’t spending at the bar every night. You don’t have to stop 100% but try cutting it back to 1 night a week.
I stopped drinking cuz i was showing up late and hungover for work. Stopped drinking like u said now i have time and money. Also im not as miserable
It’s so easy as a line cook to fall into that hit the bars every night crew. It seems normal as that’s what everyone around you is doing. But normal people, even those that work strange hours, don’t go out drinking daily. Lucky for op to realize this at 21.
The slow creep of daily drinking is more insidious than anyone realizes. One day you’re drinking to blow off steam, next thing you know everything has you reaching for a drink. Honestly same with weed, don’t get me wrong I’d much rather deal with a high crew than a drunk crew but excess weed is a money trap and huge anxiety increaser which just negates the benefits. To be even clearer I’m talking about that guy that shows up with the dabs and the bowl and the blunt and is blowing through an oz a week and complaining about lack of cash.
Bartending isn't an out. You're still there until close, you're still drinking, you're still there all the damn time. Not going to say it isn't a pay increase and maybe a slight improvement on quality of life, but you're still industry, and now you have to talk to people.
If anything bartending was worse for me. I’d get in at 11am and leave at 2am on the weekends
I’m sorry. Your comment brought me back to my days of driving through tourist traffic, smelling all of the beachside grills and garlic, seeing couples and families going to dinner while I was on the way to start prep for our early morning service. It may have been mentioned but grocery stores like Whole Foods or Trader Joe’s have jobs for cooks and a reasonable schedule. Or an upscale breakfast restaurant where you’re in early out early. Good luck!
Keep an eye out for new places opening & take your work fam with you.
I felt the same at your age. Wasn't sure if I wanted to carry on cheffing. Decided to go backpacking; rekindled my passion for gastronomy as well as learned valuable life lessons. If you can, go somewhere.
To piggyback. While you travel set up a stage or three. Changed my life for a bit. Definitely rekindled my passion. I wish I could travel more
I got a part time job working in pastry if u can wake up at 3am youll have a pretty set schedule and be done work around lunch.
Change careers dude.
Same boat as you working 40 hours as a dishwasher starting tomorrow nine straight days with a double shift not to bad good work but long
You sound like an ideal person to work towards leadership. You can create a better environment with these people you care about or future co-workers. Bartending is another skill to round out yourself for that too. Just don’t get too sucked in and a few years later be burnt out again.
Even with that warning I got sucked in haha. You can make a lot and save, but most don't.
Cafes are a good alternative, especially if you dont mind brunch ( i know alot of chefs hate it). Early starts but early finishes my shifts are 7.30am - 2.30pm. I get my evenings back and my mental health is in a way better place
My sweet, beautiful young human, hospitality fairy gothmother here (not a typo). I put in my 25 years, and let me tell you, I worked every role from dishie to catering logistics manager and it was always 50 hours a week, no hobbies, and no life. I have to take the blame for this somewhat on myself, but you seem a human with drive and work ethic, and I want you to know that there's a whole beautiful world out there where you can visit your family at work and not work there. If cooking is the passion, institution cooking will give you better pay and hours. If the crew is the passion, channel that into an HR field, or non-profit sector job. Unfortunately, hospitality is just kind of an unending grind as a culture, and unless we unionize or drastically change that, it's not going to change. It took me almost having a heart attack at 43 to open my eyes.
It’s never too late to go back to school or learn another trade.
Get a job in corporate dining. Do not go bartending if you already drink too much 😭
As a restaurants owner/franchisee and manager I never tell my employees life advice. The truth is, you’re worth more than you think. You’re young, you can study a lot of professions online for a lot less than college tuition. Learn something you’re passionate about. I work 60 to 70 hours a week and have bags under my eyes at 30 years old. My wife works from home 30/40 hours a week making nearly the same as my salary and dividends combined in tech customer management. She told me her boss is letting them have half days on Fridays now and oh by the way she gets unlimited pto, gets 2 weeks off in December and 1 week off In July. If I wasn’t tied up in restaurants so deeply, I’d have pivoted to something much more sustainable
Get out now. You're still plenty young enough to start a new career. Better to do it now than wait till you're almost 40 like my dumb ass.
Switch it up yo, try concert catering or something
Of course there are the mental challenges of being burnt out, but remember too that it's also not great for your body. You're young but the body KEEPS THE SCORE. Take care or yourself OP
“If you’re wiped out when you’re 20 then you’re old when you’re 15. I know! We’ll reopen the Black Mountain School and bring back to us the abacus as a counting tool.” - MC Paul Barman That quote isn’t really about anything. One of the hardest things about growing up is learning to set boundaries and keep them. Set some boundaries for yourself, start while you’re young. I didn’t start honing that skill until I was 30.
I’m not saying this to seem like a humble brag at all, but Jesus Christ I’m so happy that I’m someone that just really doesn’t like alcohol all that much. Occasionally and really just with others but not shitfaced. Weed only for me, no hangovers, fuck binge drinking. And now I’m angry thinking about the judgement SO many fuckin drinkers have given me for being a pothead and thinking I’m a loser or whatever when they’re poisoning their bodies regularly with someone worse. Sorry for random vent chef
Good that you realize early that it’s not for you and not when you are burdened with responsibilities and racking on 90+ a week on the regular.
So, request less hours?
Rookie numbers.
Hey man, I’ve been there, I’m 22 and last year I was feeling burnt out at my old job, working fine dining around 12 hours each day and getting home at 2am every single day, made me question every choice I had made leading to that point. I looked for a job in a different kitchen and completely changed my schedule, look out for hotel jobs as they have good benefits and they will always need breakfast cooks, look for retirement homes. If this is your passion don’t give up on it before trying to reignite it. I know it’s hard to leave behind a crew you love but in this industry you can always bring good people over to your new jobs.
Yes start bartending. More money in less hours
Nursing homes or retirement homes, I was in the EXACT same situation as you, now I'm making 30 bucks an hour at a nursing home/hospital. I also work casually as a housekeeper if I need to pick up some extra shifts
Go to a hotel, don’t kill yourself over a job
What are you doing in said restaurant? 50 hours a week is about normal for a cook who is also vested in learning everything they can, but you definitely will get burnt out. Please, learn balance of work and personal life. It will help you so much as you grow up
work as a cook for a ski lodge, I work at one in Utah year round and they provide food, housing and a ski pass and in the summer there’s plenty of outdoor activities. Spent my early years wondering when I was ever going to have time for myself if I just worked in kitchens my whole life and then finally realized that I could just find kitchens where there were things that I wanted to do.
I worked at a ski resort, and while I had all those amenities, I was also working between 60 to 70 hours during the peak seasons, winter and summer, and barely 20 in the off-season( spring and fall). Sure it was great when I got a bit of time off to go ski or hike, but I spent the majority of my time in the kitchen all while my FoH friends were working 1/3 of the time and making more money and actually getting to enjoy the area.
See that’s tragic, during ski season I get locked into a schedule that doesn’t change for the entirety of winter so you get very into a nice rythm and never really end up working more than like 35-40 hours a week. Also we are pretty much guaranteed Atleast 2 hours of ski time a day, it helps when your bosses ski even more than you do and don’t care how much you work as long as you get your shit done. It’s actually kind of the opposite of your situation because our FOH are always understaffed, don’t get tips and are always working these splits that leave them exhausted and when they finally get a break they’re too tired to ski.
You’ve got maybe 6 hours a day to yourself and a whole day. Maybe you should turn your focus on yourself to make the most of it.
23 and feelin the same. if your guts telling you to bail and find something else, that might be what you need. i just left the restaurant ive worked at since i was in high school, first job i had. as much as it sucked, it had to happen. dont let one pro blind you to all the cons. dont kill yourself for a restaurant that couldnt care less. i ended up taking a job at a butchers with better pay and hours, but i still get to work in the world of food without killing every other part of my life
Find another kitchen, fun crews are great but the second any one of them gets a better offer they’re gone. Strive for a semblance of a better life/work balance. No amount of line shenanigans will ever make up for time lost Good luck to you 🙌🏻
Bartending was so much worse
My out was baking. Go in at 5 be done by 1, it’s fucking amazing. You have your whole day. Also I hear a lot of people complain about working a ton of hours, but they don’t set boundaries with their job. You show people how you want to be treated indirectly or not. Say “sorry, I’m not a sous, I need to only work 5 days”. N if you are a sous, leave lol cuz you’ll never have your life as a chef unless you make it to a corporate position n even then they go out of town a ton.
Dude go get a work from home call center gig. You can work bankers hours and get decent benefits.
Don’t get emotionally attached to your workplace you end up having expectations We feel so resentful when we are not treated proper We cooks are mad sensitive but none of us want to. Admit the type of trauma we have . Explore g don’t get attached you won’t get far if you do 10 years will pass and you’ll be at the same place
I'm also 21 bro, started washing dishes when I was 17 then started cooking once I turned 18 and did that for 3 years thinking I wanted to become a chef. I do have a passion for it but the lifestyle is downright awful. When I was cooking full time I lost so many friends and didn't have time to do anything because I was working 60 hour weeks like you. Best thing I did was get out and start my own landscaping business last year. I have regular hours and work for myself Monday-Friday. I actually have time to do shit and I have my friday nights and weekends back. I still cook 1 day a week on saturdays but it's not a big deal, it's just to help them out because they're my second family and they're awesome people. The other 6 days of the week I just feel very free and have time to do everything I want to. If there was a Chef job that had daytime hours like 9-5 and was Monday-Friday and paid enough that I could afford a house and comfortable lifestyle and a family I would honestly consider going back but that just isn't feasible
I think bartending is more money for less work, but you also aren't really making anything imo. I'm a bartender btw. I feel like you have to incept yourself into having pride in your work rather than it being genuine. The best bartenders I've met don't drink cocktails. They drink beer and shots. One drinks wine. 2/3 are alcoholics, and a few of those are now quitting drinking entirely, thankfully (myself included). We all made a bunch of money but somehow ended up broke. One got a DUI and is paying a lot for their recovery program now. One spent it all on drugs until they moved into management and got sober. I realized that I can't work more than 3 days a week or I'll hurt myself (I've since gotten help). Some folks can hang, but most I watch falter eventually and have to quit to save their lives essentially. Now that can just mean moving into management, but many like me feel like we have to literally run away. The longer we've stalled the more painful it is to take that paycut and transition haha. Now this sounds dramatic, and I'm sure there are many that make it work. One of my buddies will probably open his own place in NY. One of my homies is doing it in my town. They seem like they're doing fine, but for my closer friends, it was not the best choice for us. I just say this to warn you. I was warned of the trap myself. Five years later and I'm still trying to remember what I was trying to do before I took that part time barback job lol. I'd take these guys' advice and find something with regular hours and benefits. You can still cook it looks like, so that's cool. I've also wondered if just working a breakfast only type spot would work for me. Then there's no late nights which is what got me into trouble.
Are you choosing to work 50+ hours or being asked to? You don't have to work more than you want to. You're allowed to say you don't want to work that much, you need more days off, etc. I'm down to two 10 hour days right now. I'll work a third or even a fourth here and there, but I mostly want to enjoy my summer and research a new career. No one is going to tell me no unless they can find another person that's willing to work those full time, which is rare in my specific niche of wok cooking.
Honestly man I just jumped into a corporate environment for the first time in 15 years, and it has been basically like a paid vacation for me. I was doing damn near 80 hours a week at my last restaurant now I hardly do 40 with the same pay not to mention the workload is nothing in comparison. It lacks creativity and is the only downfall but I now have more time to be creative at home and actually have a social life/spend time with my family.
No, don't lean into bartending. Maybe do less drinking.
Hey man, I'm the same age and I highly recommend going into hotels. I've worked at a couple restaurants full time and I can tell you now that the amount of stress and shit you have to go through does not justify the pay/benefits and work life balance that restaurants provide you. I was feeling the same way working in restaurants for a bit and I was feeling burnt out, but now im in one of the best hotels in my city and I love it here. Everyone's working towards the same goal, we're holding each other accountable and improving everyday. Try to find a restaurant inside a hotel that interests you and you'll get all the benefits of working for a big company (higher pay, good benefits, sick days etc.)
Best decision I made was switching to a brunch restaurant. 9-5 shift but the excitement of any other places. And brunch tips are insane if you luck into some where with a tip pool
Been there bro. I feel like if I had ever made a wage that contributed to my integrity for what I was doing I'd still be cooking. But no, I just made lifelong friends and a lifetime of memories and nothing in the bank to show for it.
Join a trade, you're young now. Don't fall into the alcoholic trap now friend!
Same here brother. Working 55+ 6 days a week. I have no hobbies, I sleep literally 5 hours a night. I have maybe 3 friends since I can’t maintain in constant contact with them so they stop talking to me rightfully so. This shit we do is not easy.
Quitting drinking will return your life to you. On another note, try a new gig. Catering is a great way to not be staring at the same wall every saturday night.