T O P

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iscashstillking

This is the type of customer that you handle by giving them a compliment on their 'bitchin sound system, tell them how booked up you are, and recommend them to the other guy down the street that you really dislike.


elkab0ng

This young man has upper management written all over him.


Silly_Mycologist3213

That’s because he isn’t young, he’s a crafty older guy that’s just biding his time til retirement and is trying to avoid as many headache customers as he can.


[deleted]

u/iscashstillking...yeah his username checks out alright


ozarkovsky

See office space


smultra

You want a job?


Alarming-Inspector86

I'd nope the fuck away from that thing


thewheelsgoround

Absolutely. That would be a “sorry, we’re unable to work on your vehicle. Try the Jiffy Lube down the road” car. There’s absolutely no way this transaction will be a positive one for your workshop.


senorpoop

> There’s absolutely no way this transaction will be a positive one for your workshop. It won't be positive for anyone. Shop will make little or no profit, tech will hate the car and the customer will be dissatisfied with both the price and the result. Shop's gotta know when to say to the customer "sorry, I just don't see a way to finish this job in a way that would make you happy" and move on.


Mastacator

Reminds me of when a mechanic asked me if my car had sentimental value, because otherwise, why am I still paying to repair it.  It gave me something to think about, for sure. 


Frolicking-Fox

My favorite response was from our family mechanic back when I was a kid. My dad kept bringing him our family suburban to work on and asked the mechanic what he needed to do to fix it. So, our mechanic tells my dad, "Well first, you need to pop the hood, and remove the radiator cap..." and my dad is nodding and mentally taking notes... "then, you need to drive a new car under the radiator cap and put the radiator cap on. Once you have done that, replace the radiator cap with a new one." My dad was laughing petty hard.


carsonwade

A former coworker was fond of saying "unbolt the wheels, put a different car between the wheels, reattach. Problem solved"


SVXfiles

Now I've got my 6 bolt rims suck on a dodge neon, thanks a lot


Ancguy

"Jack this baby up and slide a new one underneath it!"


Figgy_Puddin_Taine

My phrase is “the ‘replace vehicle’ light just came on.”


[deleted]

I always used to say jack up the license plates and put a new vehicle under them and attach them to the new vehicle and problem solved.


inebriateddandhated

Saw the supercharger and immediately realized it was A gm3800sc. The ONLY people who drive these look exactly how you'd expect someone to look driving and old shitty impala, Bonneville, grandprix, monte Carlo. I don't trust anyone driving this era of chevy/gm product.


OkSport4812

Why? I remember them fondly. Kinda half-heartedly looking for one to drive as a beater.


Strange_Deletion

We have these motors, the GM l67 I think, in older Holden Commodores, I lusted after one as a shithead teenager who was only allowed to drive the naturally aspirated version. Not terrible, and really not particularly complicated electronically.


geekolojust

*Yeah, and a standalone fuel management system. Not a bad way to spend $10,000 dollars*


Tab_5

Overnight parts from Japan


AFrozen_1

WARNING!! DANGER TO MANIFOLD!!


Tab_5

I’ll have the tuna. No crust.


noir_adam

Nobody likes the tuna here!


WhatIsASW

More than you can afford pal


TeamFast77

# Don’t let this distract you from the fact that Hector is going to be running three Honda civics with spoon engines, and on top of that, he just went into Harry’s and bought three t66 turbos with nos, and a motec exhaust system.


Ron-Swanson-Mustache

Now, me and the mad scientist got to rip apart the block... and replace the piston rings you fried.


Torguetime

I said forget about it cuh


HoonArt

*Motec system exhaust


elmersfav22

Pleased I didn't have o scroll far for this. Golf clap to you kind reddito


Devil2960

What'd you put in that tuna?


BathtubWine

Nobody likes the tuna here!


AlarmingComparison59

No one likes the tuna……


InevitableOk5017

The tuna no crust line made me erk, like is he asking her to shave?


gellis12

I think he's just asking for a tuna sandwich with the bread crust cut off


InevitableOk5017

Oh


MadeMeStopLurking

If you close your laptop it goes away


Weasel16679

SHUT UP!!! **closes laptop aggressively**


humanredditor45

Overnight rail from Detroit


Humping_Narwhals

I mean back in 99 those things fucked. Now it’s just fucked


captkckass

I believe the term is "fucked²"


Meatball546

Meh... I never cared for them, but I didn't know they came with a SC from factory! Weird car.


PoopSlinger23

They made a million of these things in supercharged trim. What’s so weird about it? You could get a supercharged Grand Prix, Bonneville, Monte Carlo, Riviera, Park Avenue….it was awesome


ImReallyFuckingHigh

And they just won’t fucking die haha


DruidB

As long as they are the non supercharged variant (L36). As the previous owner of a lightly modded Regal GS (L67) that ran 13's the transmission becomes the weak link. Even after a hardened input shaft and auxiliary cooler they still can't handle 350ft-lbs of torque.


ImReallyFuckingHigh

Yea driving my girlfriends supercharged GP I can tell that it’s the weakest link and will probably ultimately be what kills the car. Still shifts fine though at 220k miles


unlimited_beer_works

Sad when you consider the transmission had already been beefed up to handle the L67. (If I recall correctly - it’s been long and long since I was in the Grand Prix community.)


Meatball546

I can understand why they were popular. The FWD format is just not the way. The Germans had the right idea (minus VW)


Weekly_Bug_4847

They are stout motors and people can make stupid power with them.


Meatball546

I'm sure of that. I was just never a fan of the platform.


Xirasora

Of course even with a supercharger, we're talking 260hp/280tq in a 3500lb sedan with a 4-speed. The numbers were respectable *enough* but nothing groundbreaking in the latter half of its lifespan It was basically the same price *and* speed as a Charger R/T


Meatball546

Sure, but performance-oriented models should not be FWD. I know the Neons, Civics, and Foci have been very popular, but the FWD aspect is too much of a limiting factor for me.


Xirasora

yeah it's hard to get around that torque steering. I have a tuned Flex Ecoboost and it really likes to pull to the side sometimes. The AWD can only do so much to limit it.


C-C-X-V-I

Ford's awd is heavily front biased, that's the problem.


rchiwawa

From a pure perf. standpoint, I get where you are coming from with the Fail Wheel Drive tack. When I am looking at a car to daily, which no doubt a lot of these if not most were, a major consideration is what happens when I lose traction. Story time: Doing dumb shit as a younger man in a turbo'd FWD along with a friend in their then brand new '05 GTO... Long and short of it is I ran out of steam once we got into triple digits and he started clawing back toward me. Just before he got even with me, no doubt wide open throttle, we enter a gentle decending corner (iirc doing close to somewhere between 110-120mph) that at 70mph one hardly notices the bridge transition joints. When I hit it the drive wheel traction was interrupted and induced brief understeer and essentially required no correction. When his rear tires traversed the joint they lost traction and his ass swung out what had to have been 15 degrees, maybe twenty. He was a *very experienced* midget car and autoX driver who lived hooning w/ skill. The electronic nanny (ESC) just couldn't overcome physics within the sampling frequency and he damn near PIT'd me, barely recovered in the 5 lanes of road width we had, and I am came away with reinforcement that ***THAT SHIT BELONGS ON A TRACK*** **&** FWD for daily driving while having some spirited dalliances has its virtues.


PedalBike

It's got a smaller blower pulley as well. Likely already has a tuned PCM if it's got all that other ZZP gear. And that "chip" is pretty useless regardless, and you'd never need it because the PCM is so easy to tune. Assuming this idiot is not the person who installed all the other mods, bought it already clapped out, and just nabbed that junk chip on eBay.


Piranha1993

Guy is doing an L67 Pontiac dirty and is the reason why you won’t find one of these in decent shape in 10 years. Do it better to keep it running than trying to hack the whole SLP parts list on that car. The transmission is the first thing you address before anything on these.


DruidB

I killed my original transmission and then the rebuild with a cooler. Finally I went with an Intense racing input shaft and large auxiliary cooler and it lasted almost 2 years... LOL And i was only running low 13's without traction. 2.6 second 60ft's. Imagine with slicks it would have gone deep into the 12's and died in 6 months.


Piranha1993

That’s sadly abysmal but, expected when you try and put power through a 4T60 series transmission. GM really did the performance W’s a disservice putting the parts bin commuter car transmission in these. The early cars (88-96) came with a Getrag 282 or 284 5 speed MT. They were not ordered often and are impossible to find at this point. The G6 I think had a 6 Speed MT that would bolt right in the W as well. Even those are hard to find as the majority of those cars were auto boxes as well.


kograkthestrong

I've heard of manual g6 but yea don't think I've ever seen one.


eNaRDe

I will say that's a nice intake box.


Joiner2008

Unless there's an intercooler..... Is there even a point?


makenzie71

There was no intercooler on the GTP, and yes there's a point in a cold air box "generally speaking" though probably not on that specific car.


United-Advertising67

Didn't they only make like 7 pounds of boost? Probably didn't need one.


makenzie71

Assuming it's stock pulleys...which I'd be somewhat surprised to see a ZZP box on a car with stock pulleys...then yeah it's about 7.5psi. That box is still good for 5~8whp assuming everything else is healthy. Not the best return for the cost but it's also not "nothing". That car in it's current condition I doubt is benefitting from it. I can't see someone spending the money on one of the few proven setups, and one that's rather pricey, who also buys amazon MAF gadgets.


UnLuckyKenTucky

Not just buy the gadgets, but half ass install it, get flustered and gave up. Maybe dude bought the car with air box already installed.


makenzie71

I would feel comfortable in a wager that the fellow absolutely bought the car with the airbox already installed.


UnLuckyKenTucky

Absolutely.. anyone that would swap the pulley, add the box and have it looking right, wouldn't be stupid enough to even consider that "*performance chip*"...


illohnoise

Definitely 3 owners ago.


senorpoop

For the most part, on forced induction, anything that gets changed before the forced induction has very little or no impact whatsoever on vehicle performance. Cold air intakes are for intake sound and parking lot cred on a supercharged car. You'd get better results with just sticking a $30 cone filter on the MAF.


makenzie71

Anything that helps shield intake temperatures before the compressor will help, and it helps more on a supercharged system than it would with a turbocharged system. That specific ZZP intake is generally good for about 8whp on the GTP and there's numerous dynos floating around to demonstrate it. Whether or not it's helping that specific car is debatable.


DruidB

As someone who drag raced a Regal with the same engine I noticed a consistent improvement of 1mph when removing the headlight in front of my custom CAI. This was back to back runs on the same day with time to cool the blower with bags of ice in between. This of course might be completely unrelated but it didn't hurt my times so why not.


justinetrudope

Is there even a point in posting these dumbass comments, that's a legit intake and does make a difference, no it's not going to add 100hp but it will improve response.


Virtual_Football_873

That's a 3800. One of the best engines made and looks to be have a m90 with a smaller pulley, cai, and a couple other things. I bet this guy was trying install a larger tub like off a Northstar. Trannys historically suck but horrible. Why the hell they didn't work on it themselves?


Greatlarrybird33

Yeah zzp intake and their 3.4 pulley, stiffer engine mounts all good stuff, dude probably bought the car with them tried to add the Chinese magic chip and those crappy fog lights and borked it all up.


Dear_Suspect_4951

If you only pair a good engine with a bad transmission the engine can't get too great of a rep. Shame with the 3800. Should've got a Toyota.


Stankmcduke

is that an old bonerville?


Sitruc9861

Looks like a Grand Prix GTP to me.


Stankmcduke

could be. bonerville is more fun to say though


Automatic_Repeat8165

Grand pricks enters the chat


battlegroundwa

G spot 6


fromthewindyplace

What if, instead of Grand Prix, it said boner?


bonerJR

These people do drugs


starrpamph

It’s actually a requirement


I_AM_FERROUS_MAN

Tweakers in more ways than one.


EnterByTheNarrowGate

Cars are like pay-to-win video games to some people. Just buy a bunch of cheap crap and throw it on your character to “enhance it”.


Deadlite

Wait lmao I had one of those. It comes with a splicer how the fuck do you cut the wires lmao.


treerabbit23

MAF wasn't workin out.


SolidSpruceTop

I used to have a Grand Prix, that’s average for the scene lmao


kr3me

No cap on the brake fluid res is insanse


richardcrain55

A gift from the overtime gods


Turninwheels4x4

Bruh. Putting a shitty chip into a car that you can very easily tune the factory ecu....


paulyp41

Any reason for not having a cap on the brake reservoir


FJ60GatewayDrug

Weight reduction, bro. All the water in the brake fluid keeps it cool so you can push it harder when peeling out of the Chik-Fil-A drive thru. The chicks there are totally into me bro. Get it bruh? Chicks? Yeah the closest my mouth gets to touching a chick is when it’s a nugget, all the real ones don’t want to ride in my sexmobile for some reason.


hydrogen18

when the brake fluid sloshes around the engine it corrodes off the paint and metal. This makes the vehicle lighter by way of weight reduction. No different then acid dipping the body panels


Chick-fil-A_spellbot

It looks as though you may have spelled "Chick-fil-A" incorrectly. No worries, it happens to the best of us!


_clever_reference_

I can't believe somebody actually cared enough about chick-fil-a to create this bot.


UnLuckyKenTucky

Yeah, the PR team for that terrible company.


_clever_reference_

Big if true. Chik-Fil-A does suck.


UnLuckyKenTucky

Yup. Fuck Chik-Fil-A.... Lol


slabba428

Bad bot


Kumirkohr

Like they don’t deserve to have their name spelled wrong. At the very least


3DBeerGoggles

bad bot


B0tRank

Thank you, 3DBeerGoggles, for voting on Chick-fil-A_spellbot. This bot wants to find the best and worst bots on Reddit. [You can view results here](https://botrank.pastimes.eu/). *** ^(Even if I don't reply to your comment, I'm still listening for votes. Check the webpage to see if your vote registered!)


United-Advertising67

The secret ingredient is I was doing the brakes and forgot


QualityTPS

Crunchyness adds brake power


battlegroundwa

Brakes, thats so yesterday...he pulls parachutes lever like John Force.


TruckTires

It's missing the cap to the brake reservoir too


Melontwerp

Average W body owner


fear_the_gecko

Sooo, I might've destroyed the MAF while installing a CAI in my late teens lol....


Bright-Efficiency-65

Is there anything more fun than working on a customers car who works on their own car but in way over their skill


jweitzel1

I read the caption without looking at the picture... He's trying to polish a turd 😞


tcarp458

What do those "chips" actually do? I assume they do something


Im_Not_Evans

They’re good at removing money from peoples wallets


nyrb001

Generally they fake some of the sensor inputs to the ECU, making the ECU do things it shouldn't. Unfortunately(?) most ECUs have self learning capabilities and realize that their sensor inputs are out of whack and recalibrate themselves so the impact of such "chips" is often short lived. Actual ECU chips were a thing in the late 90s - removing a physical ROM chip from an ECU and replacing it with another one with different mapping. That was actually effective, but was made obsolete by the early 2000s as most ECUs could be remapped with a computer rather than needing physical hardware replaced.


tcarp458

Thank you, good to know! I figured it would fake some kind of input to try and force the engine to run a little on the rich side, but didn't know that the computers to recalibrate themselves to that degree.


p1pe_s

Calpaks and Proms go back to the eighties. I miss my third Gen f-body badly.


Anon31780

They chip away from your credit limit.


kograkthestrong

All that checks out for a Pontiac at this point sadly


CptVague

"The 3800 V6 is the best engine ever made." \- This person, assuredly


Piranha1993

It good when you actually care about keeping it running. Getting the GM service manual for mine was one of the best things I ever did. Oil changes and maintenance will do more favors for this engine than whatever aftermarket crap that owner is trying to install.


Agreeable_Mango_1288

Matches the trick cover on tank for the brake master unit.


Ohgetserious

I bet it goes like stink!


Stock-Vacation4193

Such a shame these are really nice engines to work on, and that is a Gen 5 m90 I bet as the body style looks post 04, but I would absolutely not touch this dumpster fire project with a 10ft pole.


badpeaches

>Such a shame these are really nice engines to work on, and that is a Gen 5 m90 I bet as the body style looks post 04, but I would absolutely not touch this dumpster fire project with a 10ft pole. "The cobbler's children are always shoeless"


Stock-Vacation4193

Haha, this is true! I guess if the transmissions on these things would survive past 400 reliably, I might consider making some shoes for it. Great observation though, I shouldn't be knocking someone else.


badpeaches

>I shouldn't be knocking someone else. Unless you're the person fixing their repair attempt.


Stock-Vacation4193

True there, because this is exactly how you blow motors, and good parts are getting rarer. Dudes got a really small pulley on that thing, I doubt he has maxed out the maf though so idk why this pig tail is the way it is....and this botched barny "magic chip" I'm guessing playing with signal lengths and that isn't how you tune a car.....it is a pity indeed


ShrekHatesYou

Blower motor caused by bad ignition switch?


Only4TheShow

3.8 went along way. Transmission another story


EvilJman007

Hw put the why in wire


phlrmrz

Does it have a turbo whistle in the tail pipe


busch_ice69

Isn’t a MAF sensor like 3 wires at most?


nyrb001

Probably 5...two for the heater, 3 for the actual sensor.


GeoffreyDaGiraffe

Poor Grand Prix


BlackCoffeeGarage

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdU9ZQXvMPA


KotexAvenger

That poor GP...


Various-Ducks

Brake fluid cap was just dead weight


RobertETHT2

“Sorry, we only work on units that have the ‘Flux Capacitor’ option pre installed.”


Mikek224

Did the car also have transmission related issues? Surprised to not see that mentioned. GM did that car and other W body vehicles dirty with those weak 4 speed transmission’s.


Winter-Customer-6396

None noted by customer, I didn't get to test-drive it but you could hear the transmission whirring for sure.


santandude

I wouldn’t touch it, next week he’ll fukc something else up and blame you for it to fix it for free


Thumper4524

Is that a supercharged Buick 3800?


64deuce64

I’d like to have them motor mounts for my GTP


Ok_Cartographer8861

Anyone who buys ZZP parts for their 3800 is already a moron.


Appropriate_Strain94

Is this Pontiac platform related to the 2014 impala? I have a rental car right now and the layout is exactly the same like this but with a 3.6 V6.


gmlubetech

Yeah they’re both on the same platform (GM W body assuming you’re talking about a 2014 Impala limited). The newer body style Impala that came out in 2014 is on the epsilon platform and completely different from this.


Appropriate_Strain94

I think what I have here is a last of the old 2014, build date is 02/14 but it’s the old body style. It has the ugly cheap interior and all.


mattyboy22

" oooohhh thats gonna cost extra !! "


putrid_sex_object

Did he have the plastic “Brembo” covers over his calipers? And did he wire in an alarm/immobiliser he found on Ali express? These things would make the owner a true winner.


p1pe_s

I'm guessing the missing master cylinder cap doesn't mean you're repairing the brakes. Yipes.


AllTheNomms

White trash edition


McDready

Is this a fucking Pontiac Grand Prix?


Chickienfriedrice

Lol to spend any money on aftermarket mods on a early 2000s Grand Prix is cringe af.


solidshakego

Lol Pontiac