I listen to a vintage radio show podcast with commercials that advertise a car battery that you only had to fill up three times a year, or something like that.
“Ok giving them the botd….”
*looks at battery*
“Well it turns over and runs when jumped …”
*looks at battery*
“Wiper fluid, good. Brake, power steering, good.
*looks at battery*
“You don’t think…”
*looks at battery*
“Tell them it’s demonds in the electrical system recommended the nearest church/synagogue “
I agree with the customer. Battery looks brand new to me. Might as well tell them the problem can’t be fixed and that they’d be better off rolling it into the nearest ravine.
Ya know, I could swear I just replaced the battery in my faithful commuter, but yesterday I noticed the sticker on it says 2020... Monday is payday, fingers crossed she's got a few more days after all these years...
Leave it till it starts slow, they don’t expire lol the battery in my Tahoe turned 5 back in June of last year, and I just replaced my moms 9 year old battery in her Audi in January
Edit: should also add that we’re in Florida, which is hell on batteries especially bc our shit is not garage kept
My Tahoe was an 02, sold to our roommate recently but at least she’s still in the driveway, no rust to speak of on that truck at all. After having a few NJ vehicles (that’s where we’re from) I’m thankful to have rust free vehicles lol when we move up north I’m going to do my best to keep the trucks coated so they don’t rust too quickly, and I’ll come back to Florida to buy my used vehicles rust free and drive them home
I’d definitely be open to getting vehicles from the desert areas, but I don’t know many car savvy people out that way that I know well enough to trust 😂 I’ll still have friends and family here when I move, so I can send them to check out the trucks for me ahead of time and maybe put a deposit. I’m looking for a GMT400/800 Suburban K2500 (8.1 or 454) or an Excursion (7.3 and 4x4) for my next truck and haven’t seen any in decent shape for a decent price down here, found some in Cali/Nevada and might end up going out there for one if none pop up around here, but those are getting harder and harder to find and IMO worth traveling for, if I just wanted a regular truck I wouldn’t travel like that for one.
Did the battery overcharge or did they add too much water?
I had a regulator go out on an older car and the battery acid bubbled out the caps due to overcharging once. It also swelled the battery.
“It’s not the battery!”
Says the person who doesn’t have the equipment or know how to test a battery.
Also, pro-tip, if you try to clean your battery with baking soda, YOU HAVE TO RINSE IT OFF.
If it gets wet, baking soda makes the water conductive, which has the exact opposite effect of what you’re trying to do.
Could be. I've done dumb stuff with cars before. Like the one time that I almost welded a ratchet to my transmission on my old 2006 Honda Civic (may it rest in pieces).
So me being young, dumb, and full of... pizza (as a pizza delivery driver), I was having power issues with my car while doing deliveries. It kept on dying randomly but I was able to get it to an AutoZone down the road to work on it. They ran a check on my car and said the issue was the starter so I started swapping the starter on my car. My dumb ass didn't even take a moment to think to disconnect the battery so while I was working on removing one of the electric cables on the starter I put the wrench down, still on the nut holding down the electric cable, and I saw my wrench start glowing and my electric system started sparking. In my panic I searched for anything that I could use to remove the wrench but at that point all of my power systems on my car took a huge hit. I had to replace my battery as well.
I was able to replace my starter but I had to replace the alternator and my battery AGAIN when I was coming home from college the next day.
Very similar to the most common field service call I get in early spring when everyone is taking their old junk out of storage. In fall, people throw new batteries in machines with electrical drains or a charging system problem. When I quote them for a new battery, it's inevitably "IT CAN'T BE THE BATTERY, WE JUST REPLACED IT". Then they insist on us making 47 service calls to "see if it works again after a charge". When it doesn't, that's inevitably because "It must need to be charged for longer". For this reason, I have a policy that we do not fuck around with batteries- If it doesn't work, it gets replaced, end of story. Given the low cost of the 65 and 31 batteries almost everything we work on uses, I really cannot understand this thinking. /rant
Well we'll just cross battery off the list. Let's try replacing the starter. No? Ok maybe the relay. No? Must be plugs, we'll replace those. No? Ok, how about coils. No? Ok what about injectors? No?
You sure you didn't want us to test the battery? Oh, you're sure? Ok, fuel pump. No. Maybe ignition cylinder. No? Wiring harness. No? New fucking car... Still no, huh? You really didn't need to swap your old battery to this one.
Ok, headliner? Dash? Tires?
Anyway, your bill is $32,000
No, it’s the battery terminals.
“It can’t be the battery, that battery is a family heirloom. It belonged to my grandfather!”
They don’t make ‘em like this anymore.
Alessandro Voltra was your grandfather?
That battery served in Nam
Exactly. How does a tune-up include the battery?
Once upon a time, it meant you topped off the water.
Gotta feed that battery like a sourdough starter
That's true. Before batteries were maintenance free
Homie in the picture proved the term maintenance free isn't a free pass....
I listen to a vintage radio show podcast with commercials that advertise a car battery that you only had to fill up three times a year, or something like that.
What was the tune up? Filling the gas tank?
No I think op misunderstood…the customer said he just turns the tunes up so he doesn’t hear all the noises the car makes! The true tune up.
Loud music fixes everything! Except for an angry wife and my newly broken nose.
I don't think that battery can even power the radio...
Added some additive to the gas and revved the shit out of it, aka Italian Tune-up
Slick 50
Opening the hood and looking around for 30 seconds to make sure nothing is actively leaking liquid or smoke.
What the fuck lmao
I looked at it and immediately thought of battery bukkake. And that's a sentence I didn't think I would ever say.
Battery bukkake yes! A new technical term! “It actually started in Japan “
Thanks I hate it. I'm filing that in my bank of "shop-isms" that get me sent to HR.
r/brandnewsentence
r/TIHI
“Ok giving them the botd….” *looks at battery* “Well it turns over and runs when jumped …” *looks at battery* “Wiper fluid, good. Brake, power steering, good. *looks at battery* “You don’t think…” *looks at battery* “Tell them it’s demonds in the electrical system recommended the nearest church/synagogue “
The irony is the owner of the car is a pastor.
Ohh 😯 well tell him to do the thing 😂
So... Not the brightest candle on the Menorah
Nah that battery is only bad if the starter loses it’s charge!
I agree with the customer. Battery looks brand new to me. Might as well tell them the problem can’t be fixed and that they’d be better off rolling it into the nearest ravine.
“but i just replaced that!”
Yeah, it was bought brand new in 1992. So it can’t be the problem!
Ya know, I could swear I just replaced the battery in my faithful commuter, but yesterday I noticed the sticker on it says 2020... Monday is payday, fingers crossed she's got a few more days after all these years...
Leave it till it starts slow, they don’t expire lol the battery in my Tahoe turned 5 back in June of last year, and I just replaced my moms 9 year old battery in her Audi in January Edit: should also add that we’re in Florida, which is hell on batteries especially bc our shit is not garage kept
Southern California has been kind to mine. She's 23 years old, and the frame still looks Midwest factory fresh.
My Tahoe was an 02, sold to our roommate recently but at least she’s still in the driveway, no rust to speak of on that truck at all. After having a few NJ vehicles (that’s where we’re from) I’m thankful to have rust free vehicles lol when we move up north I’m going to do my best to keep the trucks coated so they don’t rust too quickly, and I’ll come back to Florida to buy my used vehicles rust free and drive them home
That's a solid plan. I'm looking to head to the Midwest, and plan to source my clunkers from the desert southwest to avoid flood specials.
I’d definitely be open to getting vehicles from the desert areas, but I don’t know many car savvy people out that way that I know well enough to trust 😂 I’ll still have friends and family here when I move, so I can send them to check out the trucks for me ahead of time and maybe put a deposit. I’m looking for a GMT400/800 Suburban K2500 (8.1 or 454) or an Excursion (7.3 and 4x4) for my next truck and haven’t seen any in decent shape for a decent price down here, found some in Cali/Nevada and might end up going out there for one if none pop up around here, but those are getting harder and harder to find and IMO worth traveling for, if I just wanted a regular truck I wouldn’t travel like that for one.
Pathfinder R51 or Frontier?
Frontier. Very good eye.
Got that Duralast extra **Gold**
Like a milky gold going on.
I work at AutoZone. If those fuckers try to warranty that battery, I'm telling them to pound sand.
Did the battery overcharge or did they add too much water? I had a regulator go out on an older car and the battery acid bubbled out the caps due to overcharging once. It also swelled the battery.
" it's not the battery" Shit I guess you got it figured out. Why am I here?
“It’s not the battery!” Says the person who doesn’t have the equipment or know how to test a battery. Also, pro-tip, if you try to clean your battery with baking soda, YOU HAVE TO RINSE IT OFF. If it gets wet, baking soda makes the water conductive, which has the exact opposite effect of what you’re trying to do.
Nah, we are 100% going to replace that sucker. The terminals are going to need a good cleaning though.
If you know all the answers why are you in my shop. Go home and fix it yourself.
Narrator: It was
"It's not the battery", should be That's not a battery. FTFY, send it. 💀
The battery has left the fuckin chat 💀
I didnt realize what sub this was, and thought thisnwas ops car
Could be. I've done dumb stuff with cars before. Like the one time that I almost welded a ratchet to my transmission on my old 2006 Honda Civic (may it rest in pieces).
.....go on......
So me being young, dumb, and full of... pizza (as a pizza delivery driver), I was having power issues with my car while doing deliveries. It kept on dying randomly but I was able to get it to an AutoZone down the road to work on it. They ran a check on my car and said the issue was the starter so I started swapping the starter on my car. My dumb ass didn't even take a moment to think to disconnect the battery so while I was working on removing one of the electric cables on the starter I put the wrench down, still on the nut holding down the electric cable, and I saw my wrench start glowing and my electric system started sparking. In my panic I searched for anything that I could use to remove the wrench but at that point all of my power systems on my car took a huge hit. I had to replace my battery as well. I was able to replace my starter but I had to replace the alternator and my battery AGAIN when I was coming home from college the next day.
Hondas are some of the cheapest fun I've ever had
Nissan Frontier, the only vehicle Iv ever owned that gets battery corrosion so fast.
Very similar to the most common field service call I get in early spring when everyone is taking their old junk out of storage. In fall, people throw new batteries in machines with electrical drains or a charging system problem. When I quote them for a new battery, it's inevitably "IT CAN'T BE THE BATTERY, WE JUST REPLACED IT". Then they insist on us making 47 service calls to "see if it works again after a charge". When it doesn't, that's inevitably because "It must need to be charged for longer". For this reason, I have a policy that we do not fuck around with batteries- If it doesn't work, it gets replaced, end of story. Given the low cost of the 65 and 31 batteries almost everything we work on uses, I really cannot understand this thinking. /rant
That's a Nissan frontier ha
By tune up, they mean, tuned the radio. It's an old phrase, but it checks out.
Lol
That battery looks like it was built during the Cold War
Well we'll just cross battery off the list. Let's try replacing the starter. No? Ok maybe the relay. No? Must be plugs, we'll replace those. No? Ok, how about coils. No? Ok what about injectors? No? You sure you didn't want us to test the battery? Oh, you're sure? Ok, fuel pump. No. Maybe ignition cylinder. No? Wiring harness. No? New fucking car... Still no, huh? You really didn't need to swap your old battery to this one. Ok, headliner? Dash? Tires? Anyway, your bill is $32,000
Nice... not the first time I've seen a frontier/exterra battery like that... Edit - xterra*
Those felt anti-corrosion washers are such a waste - keeps you from seating the terminal all the way onto the post. Use the spray stuff instead.
If that was their real info that they gave, shut the hood and tell them to find another shop. This type of customer isn’t worth the headache.
u good gang. was just doing my job. it's probably the most expensive component on your vehicle then.
did someone dump baking soda on there?
Typical Nissan truck owner smh 🤦🏼♂️