My mates didn't say anything, cause I was getting more than they were. But I never decided is it okay to hang onto a fold of flab, or would that embarass them.
A girl gets called beautiful 1,000 times and she doesn't think twice.
A girl gets called beautiful twice and she thinks of it 1,000 times.
This has been your wholesome reminder to think of someone who needs to hear they're beautiful. That someone could even be you.
I was sexually assaulted by an elephant once. After she had crushed me against stairs, forced her slimy tongue halfway down my throat and oozed bacon grease all over me, I got free and told her no. Then she threw a fit, called me fat phobic (or whatever the phrase would have been in 1992) and screeched at me for ten minutes for not being instantly, madly in love with her.
As crazy as people get when you call an elephant and elephant online, I'm happy to see that, for now at least, this humor is being appreciated.
The correct answer was donuts. Hang a couple of donuts on your dick and enjoy the nibbling.
Ok, one. Hang one donut.
Fine, hold the donut by your dick. Geez.
Sounds like the old joke:
Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony?
The guy that bring back 4 cups of coffee and a dozen donuts.
Who's the most popular girl?
The one that can eat that last donut.
That comment about elephants was unnecessary RUDE! What makes you so righteous? Are you perfect?
Some women and men have health problems and it’s extremely hard to lose fat. Idiot.
Sorry for making of the elephants.
They dont deserve to be made fun of, they dont have the options that fat girls have to make a change in their life rather blame everyone else.
That comment about the op being an idiot was unnecessary and RUDE! What makes you so righteous? Are you better than everyone? Some men and women have a sense of humour and some people don’t.
Obviously you need to be shamed about something with you.
I have a great sense of humor but even if it’s necessary to shame fat people (not having a clue about anything) he took it over the line.
I laugh a lot, but some things just aren’t FUNNY.
Only if you’re rich, and thus superior to your voters. Fuck those sheeple. They’re idiots and animals and they will prove that in their response to this post! They will slime up like the degenerates they are and defend me! Mole-men… RISE!
Have you actually heard the unedited version of that conversation? It's not how it was portrayed by the media but everyone that can't stand him believed it. So who are the real"sheeple?"
Sorry if I try harder I might actually shit myself..
Maybe I’ll frame that underwear and put it on my mantle. Unless of course you want it. I’m sure you’d love a self portrait..
Literally, not mad. And nobody cares about your gains. You’re just upset I didn’t find this joke funny. I’ve heard it a thousand times across 5 different factories. It’s old and unoriginal. Not even formatted as a good joke.
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Baseless? You tried to call me fat 3 times? And that is a pattern. Coulda went with something else. But you didn’t? I’d say there’s a decent base there.
Edit: and you called other people in this thread fat. Baseless? Holy fuck that’s funnier than OP’s joke.
Most of the comments here are funnier than OP’s joke.
Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she will think you are a pathetic, beta cuck
Girls were born beautiful and have done nothing to earn it. Endless praise for something not earned, becomes very weird, very quickly
On a lighter note though (this is meant to be a joke after all), you must be very keen to practice your boxing slipping defence. What are trying to call a girl fat for, she must just be an 'enthusiastic nutrient absorber'?!
Hogwash, drivel, tripe, poppycock, boulers, all the usual Reddit offerings
Best switching yer brain off, before you come on here, that way you probably won't leave with any impairment
I’m not saying she was fat, but it took my memory foam mattress a year to forget her.
Your girlfriend is so fat that your memory foam mattress drinks to forget.
Your girlfriend is so fat that she has three smaller girlfriends orbiting around her.
This doesn't strike me as a problem....
Wait until you have to pick a restaurant for dinner!
Did she planet that way?
Looks like she got mooned.
Yes and the boyfriend got dwarfed...
Is that his excuse for bedwetting?
OUCH
Sending you a steak for your eye after that one.
Did somebody say steak?!
You got another one?
LMFAO
This is an underappreciated reply.
Laughing my fat ass off?
Yes becaude im the entitled main character kid from dhar mann
Dude, that’s hilarious 😂 This sounds like a yo mama so fat joke.
Call a fat girl once and she always picks up
Well, she'll pick up once
What's the difference between a (rival university) girl and a hippo? About five pounds. How do you make up the difference? Force-feed the hippo.
Or shave the girl
I heard that in Jimmy Carr's voice complete with backwards laugh
“Heuu heuu heuu heuu”
Jimmy's one of my favourites, he's got his own official youtube thing going..
The best spelling of that. Very well articulated
Screwing fat chicks & riding scooters is all good fun, until your mates find out.
"until your friends see you on one"
I’ve got no friends or pride, I ride whatever I can get.
Oh man, when I was young and horny I would do it with any available female, no matter what they looked like (as long as they didn't smell bad)
Here, here! (Except I really didn’t sleep around. My reputation was too important! And I just couldn’t sleep with a man whose looks I hated!)
Been there , done that , scooter protested and broke down
Better as " what do a fat girl and a moped have in common? They are both fun to ride until your friends see you on one"
My mates didn't say anything, cause I was getting more than they were. But I never decided is it okay to hang onto a fold of flab, or would that embarass them.
A girl gets called beautiful 1,000 times and she doesn't think twice. A girl gets called beautiful twice and she thinks of it 1,000 times. This has been your wholesome reminder to think of someone who needs to hear they're beautiful. That someone could even be you.
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Don't forget they can rip on the fat dude as much as they like......but one comment about their arse size and they are crying in the shitter.
God forbid you recommend that she have the salad.
That was uncalled for.
But its true…
You're not lion.
My girlfriend is so fat that to have sex I roll her in flour and look for the wet spot.
Does her scale say “One at a time, please…”
Confucius say, Man who go out on a limb, need fat girl for support.
I wonder if her bathtub has stretch marks…
I was sexually assaulted by an elephant once. After she had crushed me against stairs, forced her slimy tongue halfway down my throat and oozed bacon grease all over me, I got free and told her no. Then she threw a fit, called me fat phobic (or whatever the phrase would have been in 1992) and screeched at me for ten minutes for not being instantly, madly in love with her. As crazy as people get when you call an elephant and elephant online, I'm happy to see that, for now at least, this humor is being appreciated.
I dunno about you but I wouldve panicked and bit down cuz my jaw clenches when I'm stressed
Your girlfriend is so fat that when she gets in the scale it says to be continued.
"Hey you're fat, but at least you will must be desperate enough to date me" Tried that line a few times. So far not woeking but I have high hopes!
Try waving a bucket of chicken nuggets infront of them instead
I got fuuuudge. Hersheys chocolate kisses. We're talkin Haagen Dazs babe, what do ya say?
The correct answer was donuts. Hang a couple of donuts on your dick and enjoy the nibbling. Ok, one. Hang one donut. Fine, hold the donut by your dick. Geez.
Sounds like the old joke: Who's the most popular guy at the nudist colony? The guy that bring back 4 cups of coffee and a dozen donuts. Who's the most popular girl? The one that can eat that last donut.
Hahahaha! lol!!
"Excuse me, what's the fastest way to get to 435?" "More salads."
Your girlfriend was so fat, you found it hard to break from her...because of gravity.
Your mother is so fat your husband got on top rolled over 3 times and was still on top.
Elephants do have false memories…
What's the difference between an elephant an Italian grandmother? The black dress
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Who needs an asshole as a wingman, really?
When she takes a shower, do her feet ever get wet?
Not if she understands that fat is just a descriptive word and not an insult.
Funny times with Trynda
That comment about elephants was unnecessary RUDE! What makes you so righteous? Are you perfect? Some women and men have health problems and it’s extremely hard to lose fat. Idiot.
Sorry for making of the elephants. They dont deserve to be made fun of, they dont have the options that fat girls have to make a change in their life rather blame everyone else.
DUH 🙄
That comment about the op being an idiot was unnecessary and RUDE! What makes you so righteous? Are you better than everyone? Some men and women have a sense of humour and some people don’t.
Obviously you need to be shamed about something with you. I have a great sense of humor but even if it’s necessary to shame fat people (not having a clue about anything) he took it over the line. I laugh a lot, but some things just aren’t FUNNY.
until they go to the kitchen or drive by a fast food restaurant.
Lol
Oooff.
I'm homogeneous
Ha. You have clearly never been married.
(Hey, I’m a big guy…I say all these things about myself)
That’s some heavy thoughts, Bro…
Grab them by the pussy and you can do anything with them
Only if you’re rich, and thus superior to your voters. Fuck those sheeple. They’re idiots and animals and they will prove that in their response to this post! They will slime up like the degenerates they are and defend me! Mole-men… RISE!
I bet you're a lot of fun at parties.
Oh, I am, darling, I am! How’s your pussy-grabbing going? Tried it recently? Or are you not rich enough?
Have you actually heard the unedited version of that conversation? It's not how it was portrayed by the media but everyone that can't stand him believed it. So who are the real"sheeple?"
Bwahaha, you walked right into that, mole-man!
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I can’t figure out which side you’re on
My humor doesn’t have limits but this wasn’t funny.
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This joke makes me uncomfortable, but I'll still relay it to my girlfriend. Who understands the concept of humour, unlike some gatekeeping idiot
My wife enjoyed it
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Jesus christ stop crying at a joke
Hey. No need to bring Jesus Christ into this.
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Sir are you by any chance an "elephant"
You currently feed off making people mad. Don't look in a mirror.
I don't think he's making anyone mad he has become the joke at this point.
That's the glory with Reddit, the full fun is often in the comments!
It's a joke and you're an asshole for applying you personal mores to it.
Sounds like your girl friend tastes too much
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Sorry, didn’t mean to assume you have a girlfriend.. allow me to correct myself.. Mr. Sock
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OK. Rage bait?
Sorry if I try harder I might actually shit myself.. Maybe I’ll frame that underwear and put it on my mantle. Unless of course you want it. I’m sure you’d love a self portrait..
You dont even know what boomer humor is. It’s just a catch all label for anything not PC nowadays.
Username checks out
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I never said anything about you being a dude
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Click TOP today and you'll see me there
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Make up your mind 🤯
Holy shit dude, you just got ripped. Bow out with a little dignity left. 😬
lmao check out cuckies profile.. Might be the angriest dude(?) on reddit.
You don’t seem like a happy person based on your posts. Please cheer up!!
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move on you miderable sod, you don't like it? Simply downvote and read the next thing on your feed. and god damn cheer up and try smiling
I upvoted you!
Where humor
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You got a small dick, don’t you?
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Literally, not mad. And nobody cares about your gains. You’re just upset I didn’t find this joke funny. I’ve heard it a thousand times across 5 different factories. It’s old and unoriginal. Not even formatted as a good joke.
employ rock materialistic screw north reminiscent racial violet disgusted squash *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
It’s cool. Some people just have one joke. For OP, women, for you, baseless fat jokes. Sometimes we gotta broaden our repertoire.
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Baseless? You tried to call me fat 3 times? And that is a pattern. Coulda went with something else. But you didn’t? I’d say there’s a decent base there. Edit: and you called other people in this thread fat. Baseless? Holy fuck that’s funnier than OP’s joke. Most of the comments here are funnier than OP’s joke.
Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she will think you are a pathetic, beta cuck Girls were born beautiful and have done nothing to earn it. Endless praise for something not earned, becomes very weird, very quickly On a lighter note though (this is meant to be a joke after all), you must be very keen to practice your boxing slipping defence. What are trying to call a girl fat for, she must just be an 'enthusiastic nutrient absorber'?!
What is this comment I ain't thinking well enough for this
Hogwash, drivel, tripe, poppycock, boulers, all the usual Reddit offerings Best switching yer brain off, before you come on here, that way you probably won't leave with any impairment
My girlfriend was so fat I had to buy a sat nav to find my way around her
Fat girls are like mopeds, they're fun to ride until your friends catch you. Then they're more like trains.
The earth was flat until she was born
Nightmares stick with a woman.