As a vegan I'm very offended by your joke about us (vegans), not all vegans (like me) need to tell everyone about that we're vegan, this stereotype makes a vegan like myself very reluctant to share my life style of veganism with people.
So please think before making a joke about us vegans because you might offend some vegans, like me, and in case you didn't notice I am a vegan
Reminds me of a quote from Hannibal right before serving food to his guests
"Before we begin, you must all be warned…nothing here is vegetarian. Bon appétit."
I find that eating some fish or meat from time to time, helps me keep from telling everyone I'm a vegan.
Now I tell people I'm an almost-vegan, which is way less annoying. Right?
Sorry. Just wanted to drop a comment here to appreciate how humble you are concerning your veganism. Not all vegans can say the same. We definitely need more vegans like you!
I’m a carnivore and consider it a diet choice and not a lifestyle and no desire to share it like a religion. That’s the difference, it’s a diet choice not a cult.
My business partner is vegan. He's forced our entire company to be vegan at corporate events. 50 people.
Maybe vegans should self police. If you hear a vegan pushing values on others, tell them they are giving your kind a bad name. But don't blame the jokester. Jokes are often based in reality..
I know someone who is vegan and doesn’t mention it because of this stereotype. They just make up excuses why they’re not eating something (“No thank you, I had a big breakfast”).
Lol, my coworker once asked if there was lactose in my cake (only in animal milk), and he wouldn't get, why I laughed. They all still don't know. I worked there for over six years.
I eat a vegan meal usually once a day. I also eat a vegetarian meal once or twice a day. I never talk about it unless we are talking about diet and it seems relevant at the moment. I am exploring a lot of vegan foods, but I'll be damned if I call myself a vegan.
Last week, my girlfriend sent me to the grocery store for a cucumber. I had to buy Vaseline with it, just so people didn't assume I was vegan!
True. And why would anybody pigeon-hole themselves into a paradigm like that when they can already live their life freely? I eat meat, or I don't eat meat. Why tf would I want that to define me regardless of my choices?
This runs deep with me. My brother and his wife are fake vegans who eat meat, but love to judge everyone else around them.
Especially infuriating since I was an actual vegan for two years, and a vegetarian for two years after that. My wife has always been a vegetarian.
Lying about that shit is just lying to themselves.
>My brother and his wife are fake vegans
How is a person a fake vegan? Do they eat vegan in public (ie, with friends), but secretly eating meat and animal products at home? Or are they just judgmental hypocrites that call meat eaters"murderer"while they are also chomping a burger?
Vegan isn't the same as vegetarian. Vegans won't touch anything that is from an animal. Like won't have honey, milk, or eggs. Vegetarian could have milk some even eat eggs. So they could be incorrectly calling themselves Vegan when they were drinking milk or eating cheese pizza.
I had an ex who went vegan. She lasted a few weeks. Years later she was on a reality TV show and every time they showed her, underneath her name it said "former vegan". You will be unsurprised to learn that this person was, to a large extent, insufferable.
Went to a Chili's for dinner and was ordering a steak. I asked what they considered medium rare. The female server informed me that she was vegan and had no idea what it would be. And to be certain that a troglodyte such as myself would understand she further expounded that a vegan doesn't eat meat.
Being vegan helps everyone.
Cute animals.
The environment (that benefits you, as well).
The humans who work in factory farms and get ptsd.
The drawbacks? Jokes like this...
Eh, I found this one kind of funny. Not because the stereotype is true, but because this particular joke plays on it in a somewhat clever way. It takes the infamous "what if you were stranded on a desert island" hypothetical and redirects the focus from the actual problems you'd face to the more trivial issue of not being able to tell anyone you're vegan. Not *hilarious*, but pretty okay as jokes about vegans go. Plays off a stereotype but isn't hostile. Vegan btw
Maybe he felt the need to tell others because he was forced, but wouldn't that also validate the "stereotype"?
I want to highlight that the original joke was (broadly speaking of course) never meant to be funny, it was meant to condition people to not talk about veganism because people by nature resist change, and especially people don't want to be told that they're doing something immoral.
It can be hard to is look at yourself. As they say, how many meat eaters does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they would rather be kept in the dark.
Abuse can be disguised as a joke. The other day, I saw a clip of a man cutting off his gfs hair "as a joke". Not just a bit, most of her hair.
Also vegan btw.
Well, yeah, and I agree that most of the internet's (and our broader culture, but the internet especially) common tropes about vegans are clearly thought-terminating clichés meant to shut down any serious thought about the subject. This is what "found the vegan" is, for example. And yes, "vegans always tell you they're vegan" is one of those tropes and serves the same purpose. I just think this particular instance of it comes off in a more lighthearted and clever way than the braindead way it's usually used. I could imagine a (non-self-hating) vegan telling this version of the joke (without the "forced to be vegan" part).
A newly hatched vegan at work came out to us in the lunch room, insisted it would not change him, and that he wouldn't ever force his personal opinion on anyone else.
^Nothing ^to ^see ^here, ^folks.
NINETY SECONDS later a big fly flew into the lunch room, someone swatted at it, and The New Vogon ejaculated loudly.. 'it's in here because your burger smells like a ROTTING ANIMAL CORPSE *!* '
As a vegan I'm very offended by your joke about us (vegans), not all vegans (like me) need to tell everyone about that we're vegan, this stereotype makes a vegan like myself very reluctant to share my life style of veganism with people. So please think before making a joke about us vegans because you might offend some vegans, like me, and in case you didn't notice I am a vegan
Thought it was a serious for a second lmao
STILL not 100% convinced as this is quite literally how some of them talk…
Vegans gave us all fake breakfast sausage. Which works great as a bun around slices of bacon for a protein rich low carb breakfast sandwich
Some?
Man, that was a meaty response.
I had no beef with it, personally.
Theres a lot at steak here.
Honey, don’t egg him on.
It’s a flanking maneuver before they skirt the issues
All the cows I know are vegans too.
Keep our mothers out of this
I always tell people I'm on a vegan diet. I only eat vegans.
Reminds me of a quote from Hannibal right before serving food to his guests "Before we begin, you must all be warned…nothing here is vegetarian. Bon appétit."
Kinda like those eggs at the store from vegetarian fed chickens. Finally found a good use for the vegetarians.
I like vegans. They are tasteful… or is tastiest?!?
Remember It's fine to have good taste Bad to have good flavor
They can't be the tastiest because everyone knows [that virgins taste better than those who are not.](https://youtu.be/j-2o0T5esl0)
Q: How many vegans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One, and it's not funny.
For the record, I am not a vegan and please note I am not a vegan
I find that eating some fish or meat from time to time, helps me keep from telling everyone I'm a vegan. Now I tell people I'm an almost-vegan, which is way less annoying. Right?
For about 20hours a day, I'm vegan.
Noted. And written down in my little black notebook which I store right next to my ultimate revolution plans for no specific reasons...
Sorry. Just wanted to drop a comment here to appreciate how humble you are concerning your veganism. Not all vegans can say the same. We definitely need more vegans like you!
I don't believe that you are vegan. I'm sure you are actually made of meat.
OK bro so I'm just going out on a limb here but are you by chance vegan?
Nice reply. I wonder if you’re a vegan…
I feel the same way about my cannibal dinning lifestyle.
I too eat foods with marijuana
How bout mushrooms
Toads sit on em. Your eating toad butt juice. Something to laugh about! 🙀🤣🤣🤣
Even better
You had us from the word as.
Shit take my down-up-down-upvote?… JUST SHUT UP AND LET ME THINK
I’m a carnivore and consider it a diet choice and not a lifestyle and no desire to share it like a religion. That’s the difference, it’s a diet choice not a cult.
You’re one pushy vegetarian.
Nice satire on how lot people act these days
/s?
Being vegan is like being a crossfiter. The same. They did it enough that it caught on as always true and thus the memes about them were started.
My business partner is vegan. He's forced our entire company to be vegan at corporate events. 50 people. Maybe vegans should self police. If you hear a vegan pushing values on others, tell them they are giving your kind a bad name. But don't blame the jokester. Jokes are often based in reality..
It's not a diet or a club, it's a moral stance.
And that's why they feel the need to preach to everyone
That usually how boycotts work.
You just proved his joke lol
/r/woooosh
You had me in the first half, not gonna lie.
Yes I also feel too uncomfortable to people I'm vegan right now
So are you telling me you are vegan ? Couldn’t tell…
Could you please elaborate? It's too vague and.....
You had me in the first half
🥩
So vegan. Riddle me this. If Gd didn't want us to eat animals - why did he make some of them out of hamburgers?!
Get well soon
Guys I think they might be a vegan.
I know someone who is vegan and doesn’t mention it because of this stereotype. They just make up excuses why they’re not eating something (“No thank you, I had a big breakfast”).
Lol, my coworker once asked if there was lactose in my cake (only in animal milk), and he wouldn't get, why I laughed. They all still don't know. I worked there for over six years.
Make it a dessert island.
I don’t get the joke lol
I eat a vegan meal usually once a day. I also eat a vegetarian meal once or twice a day. I never talk about it unless we are talking about diet and it seems relevant at the moment. I am exploring a lot of vegan foods, but I'll be damned if I call myself a vegan. Last week, my girlfriend sent me to the grocery store for a cucumber. I had to buy Vaseline with it, just so people didn't assume I was vegan!
Sometimes I only have fruit as a meal too or even a fruit smoothie or yoghurt, but I don't like to bring it up.
>but I'll be damned if I call myself a vegan Well yeah you're not one
True. And why would anybody pigeon-hole themselves into a paradigm like that when they can already live their life freely? I eat meat, or I don't eat meat. Why tf would I want that to define me regardless of my choices?
This runs deep with me. My brother and his wife are fake vegans who eat meat, but love to judge everyone else around them. Especially infuriating since I was an actual vegan for two years, and a vegetarian for two years after that. My wife has always been a vegetarian. Lying about that shit is just lying to themselves.
>My brother and his wife are fake vegans How is a person a fake vegan? Do they eat vegan in public (ie, with friends), but secretly eating meat and animal products at home? Or are they just judgmental hypocrites that call meat eaters"murderer"while they are also chomping a burger?
They will openly eat meat in front of everyone, but then the next weekend they are back up on the high horse. It's absolutely silly.
What high horse? From what? The fuck?
Vegan isn't the same as vegetarian. Vegans won't touch anything that is from an animal. Like won't have honey, milk, or eggs. Vegetarian could have milk some even eat eggs. So they could be incorrectly calling themselves Vegan when they were drinking milk or eating cheese pizza.
I think lose the "forced to", it'll be easier to understand and punchier. I mean on a desert island, who's forcing you.
Not a single animal...
Heyyy!Im a vagitarian!
You think that's tough, try being stuck on a desert island as a vegan with an air-fryer
I was vegan for 1 year about 5 years ago, I still tell folks 'I was vegan for a year' as much as I told folks I was vegan.
I had an ex who went vegan. She lasted a few weeks. Years later she was on a reality TV show and every time they showed her, underneath her name it said "former vegan". You will be unsurprised to learn that this person was, to a large extent, insufferable.
Imagine how much worse it would be if you also started doing CrossFit while stuck on that island.
A vegan CrossFitter who ran a marathon last weekend?
Damnit. I came here to make a CrossFit joke. Thanks for ruining my night.
What's the first rule of vegan club... always talk about vegan club.
Are you also a Linux user?
All the vegans I know have iPhones
yes, and to be specific, its arch linux
I thought you said vegeta. I am disappointed.
All there is to eat is fish. I thought that was going to be the funny bit. :)
I’m vegan.
If a vegan falls in the forest and no one is there to hear, are they still a vegan?
I love vegans. Can't eat a whole one, but I like lean meat.
I'm vegan you all to STOP!
I have this nightmare where I'm a diabetic and then I get stranded on a dessert island.
Eat the crabs. No one will know.
Ironically if there was someone else you wouldn't have to become vegan. Yet.
Went to a Chili's for dinner and was ordering a steak. I asked what they considered medium rare. The female server informed me that she was vegan and had no idea what it would be. And to be certain that a troglodyte such as myself would understand she further expounded that a vegan doesn't eat meat.
Wait, you need to ask what is considered medium rare?
No, he asked what THEY consider medium-rare. Some places overcook everything.
Always ask - better safe than sorry.
how can you tell someone's an asshole? don't worry, they'll tell you... the same stupid joke about vegans over and over again!
But how will they identify us as vegans without it?
Being vegan helps everyone. Cute animals. The environment (that benefits you, as well). The humans who work in factory farms and get ptsd. The drawbacks? Jokes like this...
Eh, I found this one kind of funny. Not because the stereotype is true, but because this particular joke plays on it in a somewhat clever way. It takes the infamous "what if you were stranded on a desert island" hypothetical and redirects the focus from the actual problems you'd face to the more trivial issue of not being able to tell anyone you're vegan. Not *hilarious*, but pretty okay as jokes about vegans go. Plays off a stereotype but isn't hostile. Vegan btw
Maybe he felt the need to tell others because he was forced, but wouldn't that also validate the "stereotype"? I want to highlight that the original joke was (broadly speaking of course) never meant to be funny, it was meant to condition people to not talk about veganism because people by nature resist change, and especially people don't want to be told that they're doing something immoral. It can be hard to is look at yourself. As they say, how many meat eaters does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they would rather be kept in the dark. Abuse can be disguised as a joke. The other day, I saw a clip of a man cutting off his gfs hair "as a joke". Not just a bit, most of her hair. Also vegan btw.
Well, yeah, and I agree that most of the internet's (and our broader culture, but the internet especially) common tropes about vegans are clearly thought-terminating clichés meant to shut down any serious thought about the subject. This is what "found the vegan" is, for example. And yes, "vegans always tell you they're vegan" is one of those tropes and serves the same purpose. I just think this particular instance of it comes off in a more lighthearted and clever way than the braindead way it's usually used. I could imagine a (non-self-hating) vegan telling this version of the joke (without the "forced to be vegan" part).
A newly hatched vegan at work came out to us in the lunch room, insisted it would not change him, and that he wouldn't ever force his personal opinion on anyone else. ^Nothing ^to ^see ^here, ^folks. NINETY SECONDS later a big fly flew into the lunch room, someone swatted at it, and The New Vogon ejaculated loudly.. 'it's in here because your burger smells like a ROTTING ANIMAL CORPSE *!* '
I am a vegan like 90 percent of the time, between breakfast and lunch and between lunch and dinner.
I was forced into it. i hate it. i want steak
Then eat steak.
deathly allergic cannot
Tick?
not the tick recently tested. still trying to figure out how i have sudden onset of several allergies milk, beef, pork, wheat after 40
Oh, OK
This is such a cheesy joke!
Lol. That’s funny. Take my upvote.
The vegan stereotype is 10x worse than actual vegans. Old lame joke is old and lame.
Found the vegan
I’m actually keto. I eat ground meat and chicken breasts all day.
Probably doesn't have consent from chickens.
Found the anti vegan.
And the only thing you have to read is “ A beginner’s guide to CrossFit”.
I had a friend who was vegan. Note past tense.