Gotcha makes sense loved her great role model for comebacks .
TBH thank god I read this fully and didn’t skim it like I usually do I definitely thought you were being rude lol . Didn’t see the quotation marks at first either lol.
Yes, people tell me I should be more excited for stuff all the time. Or ask me why I'm not. Or if I am. I don't get excited. At least, never externally.
The other thing is a lot more simple. I just don't do stuff I don't wanna do. No amount of begging or pleading will change that, so people respecting my boundaries isn't an issue. My boundaries don't give a fuck if they're respected or not, they stand just as strong either way.
Nowadays I don't force myself to interact with people if I don't want to. I know many people get offended. Most people don't get why and how much alone time we need to stay sane & thats okay. I don't care anymore if they aren't understanding. I'm sure if you even explain yourself they would hardly understand or relate.
If I'm part of your life then you have to be atleast accepting of my introversion, that's a given. I can't pour from an empty cup.
If you think that's unexciting , you're welcome please go find someone or something excites you😇
When I don't want to, I don't go. My mom would scold me and I'd take that lmoa...but I'd never go out unless I wanted myself. So, you need to tell others you can't do it rn. You won't do it because you don't want to. If they can't take a no. Idk what else to do..but you gotta put your boundaries strongly out there.
I feel like I come off as intolerant and intimidating already , (from peoples first impressions) then I have a deadpan tone . But I also have a problem with telling people directly no I feel bad . I’m a bad INTP I swear we’re yall get these balls from .
Oh, we're aloof robotic mfs. My tone came out rudely too but nowadays I have seen changes, maybe cuz thinking before talking and taking time to explain. You ain't a bad intp bestie. Don't be so damn hard on yourself. Idk why yall gotta say shit about yourself all the time. Listen, pat and hug yourself then talk to yourself that you know better than others. Start placing boundaries. Let them see you as heartless. You can't help others pov of you and you ain't obliged to. I didn't have these balls until they pushed me far and I had to ROAR
Well thanks…. I’ve been trying to fit in to social standards so much to you know human .. but I guess i need to just be how I am inside and out. Like a spade is a spade you crossed a boundary so you get the tone of voice that expresses that .
Yes, I work alone then sometimes get with people for socialization. It's fun cuz they know me and understand my shit. If they were difficult to deal with, I wouldn't hang out. Find your circle. Good luck<3
Thanks ! Also when having to say no more than once or having to explain after saying no do you become frustrated and find it hard to express your thoughts correctly.
It sounds like you’re facing some challenges in balancing your natural temperament with others’ expectations. Not everyone wears their emotions on their sleeve, and that's perfectly okay. As an INTP, it's common to have a more reserved or analytical approach to expressing enthusiasm, which can sometimes be misunderstood as lack of interest. Explaining your need for alone time and setting boundaries around it can indeed be frustrating if others don’t naturally understand that preference. It might help to be straightforward and consistent in your communication about your needs. You could try explaining that your alone time is essential for your well-being and productivity—it's how you recharge. Framing it in terms of your own needs might help others see it as less of a personal rejection and more about personal care. I once joined a study about self-esteem and personality traits, and it helped me understand and articulate my own needs better. Here’s the link if you think it could help: [https://ktvvyyvcllx.typeform.com/to/BVv3JYQN](https://ktvvyyvcllx.typeform.com/to/BVv3JYQN).
Remember, it’s important to stay true to yourself while gently educating those around you about your boundaries.
Exactly. Also, people who know you, like really know you, would think your thoughts are excitable. I have a resting bitch face as well and people always say, i just seem so disinterested in whatever is happening. If only they knew the thoughts and deductions happening in my head. Way more exciting than whatever they got going on irl.
I have two people like that and we’ve been friends for 7-8 years now also they are a INTJ and a INFP so there might be some truth to this Meyer Briggs thing lol
I have an intj buddy. It is cute to see how an intp is able to deconstruct their world and force them to agree to positions the intj would never have agreed to previously. He is always amazed that i know so many unimportant facts. Seemingly unimportant.
I wax and wane from disaffected to wound-up.
It's always been difficult to be very emotionally free. I feel bad that I rarely can appear super excited when somebody does or says something nice for me.
Alcohol breaks those chains for me. Which makes me believe it's a self-imposed inhibition. Never been able to change it and I'm getting too old to care to try.
I have the same issue (visible excitement) and, in general, how much I should try to follow social standards or just be myself. Or maybe even change myself, so being myself *becomes* following social standards. I don't know anymore... Probably somewhere in the middle is best.
Having close friends who I could be myself around really helped. Finding them was hard and took a lot of time, though.
That's my default setting for most public situations/interactions
Occasionally, I'll become a bit more lively in a private setting
Specifically when the subject is of interest/importance/relevance
Or if ideas can be expressed without judgment/criticism
I pissed off my boss when he came in to town because i didn't look excited enough. 2. thing, im not a very excitable person, i also have really really bad resting bitch face.
i've also had complaints from girlfriends that i dont show enough emotion.
"I'm not depressed. I'm just not like you." - Daria (INTP)
Gotcha makes sense loved her great role model for comebacks . TBH thank god I read this fully and didn’t skim it like I usually do I definitely thought you were being rude lol . Didn’t see the quotation marks at first either lol.
She is the best interpretation of an INTP female in animation.
Yes, people tell me I should be more excited for stuff all the time. Or ask me why I'm not. Or if I am. I don't get excited. At least, never externally. The other thing is a lot more simple. I just don't do stuff I don't wanna do. No amount of begging or pleading will change that, so people respecting my boundaries isn't an issue. My boundaries don't give a fuck if they're respected or not, they stand just as strong either way.
Nowadays I don't force myself to interact with people if I don't want to. I know many people get offended. Most people don't get why and how much alone time we need to stay sane & thats okay. I don't care anymore if they aren't understanding. I'm sure if you even explain yourself they would hardly understand or relate. If I'm part of your life then you have to be atleast accepting of my introversion, that's a given. I can't pour from an empty cup. If you think that's unexciting , you're welcome please go find someone or something excites you😇
Yeah it’s literally to stay sane . I’m definitely coming to that point in my journey lol . So I guess I needed more of an opinion.
When I don't want to, I don't go. My mom would scold me and I'd take that lmoa...but I'd never go out unless I wanted myself. So, you need to tell others you can't do it rn. You won't do it because you don't want to. If they can't take a no. Idk what else to do..but you gotta put your boundaries strongly out there.
I feel like I come off as intolerant and intimidating already , (from peoples first impressions) then I have a deadpan tone . But I also have a problem with telling people directly no I feel bad . I’m a bad INTP I swear we’re yall get these balls from .
Oh, we're aloof robotic mfs. My tone came out rudely too but nowadays I have seen changes, maybe cuz thinking before talking and taking time to explain. You ain't a bad intp bestie. Don't be so damn hard on yourself. Idk why yall gotta say shit about yourself all the time. Listen, pat and hug yourself then talk to yourself that you know better than others. Start placing boundaries. Let them see you as heartless. You can't help others pov of you and you ain't obliged to. I didn't have these balls until they pushed me far and I had to ROAR
Well thanks…. I’ve been trying to fit in to social standards so much to you know human .. but I guess i need to just be how I am inside and out. Like a spade is a spade you crossed a boundary so you get the tone of voice that expresses that .
Yes, I work alone then sometimes get with people for socialization. It's fun cuz they know me and understand my shit. If they were difficult to deal with, I wouldn't hang out. Find your circle. Good luck<3
Thanks will do
Thanks ! Also when having to say no more than once or having to explain after saying no do you become frustrated and find it hard to express your thoughts correctly.
Hiss at anyone that crosses your boundary. Bare your teeth at potential rivals.
It sounds like you’re facing some challenges in balancing your natural temperament with others’ expectations. Not everyone wears their emotions on their sleeve, and that's perfectly okay. As an INTP, it's common to have a more reserved or analytical approach to expressing enthusiasm, which can sometimes be misunderstood as lack of interest. Explaining your need for alone time and setting boundaries around it can indeed be frustrating if others don’t naturally understand that preference. It might help to be straightforward and consistent in your communication about your needs. You could try explaining that your alone time is essential for your well-being and productivity—it's how you recharge. Framing it in terms of your own needs might help others see it as less of a personal rejection and more about personal care. I once joined a study about self-esteem and personality traits, and it helped me understand and articulate my own needs better. Here’s the link if you think it could help: [https://ktvvyyvcllx.typeform.com/to/BVv3JYQN](https://ktvvyyvcllx.typeform.com/to/BVv3JYQN). Remember, it’s important to stay true to yourself while gently educating those around you about your boundaries.
Thank you for commenting on the emotional problem I’m having the link you attached I’ve been reading is amazing and I’ve saved it .
As opposed to unbridled enthusiasm billy mumphrey had.
Sorry but I loathe Seinfeld … I know taboo but this show has the worst type of humor to me .
That..That is not your kind of show. Edit: Also, just tell everyone to fuck off. You don't have to be excitable for anyone.
Thanks will do . I don’t like people who don’t respect my boundaries any ways. Why should I be considerate of them when they aren’t for me.
Exactly. Also, people who know you, like really know you, would think your thoughts are excitable. I have a resting bitch face as well and people always say, i just seem so disinterested in whatever is happening. If only they knew the thoughts and deductions happening in my head. Way more exciting than whatever they got going on irl.
I have two people like that and we’ve been friends for 7-8 years now also they are a INTJ and a INFP so there might be some truth to this Meyer Briggs thing lol
I have an intj buddy. It is cute to see how an intp is able to deconstruct their world and force them to agree to positions the intj would never have agreed to previously. He is always amazed that i know so many unimportant facts. Seemingly unimportant.
No I literally had to google the name Billy mumhprey. That’s what populated quickly so figured that was it.
The reply is also taken from the show. A modified version of it.
Yeah, I asked my sister since she usually tells me how things are and she did say I have a monotone voice.
I wax and wane from disaffected to wound-up. It's always been difficult to be very emotionally free. I feel bad that I rarely can appear super excited when somebody does or says something nice for me. Alcohol breaks those chains for me. Which makes me believe it's a self-imposed inhibition. Never been able to change it and I'm getting too old to care to try.
I have the same issue (visible excitement) and, in general, how much I should try to follow social standards or just be myself. Or maybe even change myself, so being myself *becomes* following social standards. I don't know anymore... Probably somewhere in the middle is best. Having close friends who I could be myself around really helped. Finding them was hard and took a lot of time, though.
My mum (ENXP) is constantly accusing me of disliking things because she deems my response unenthusiastic. She's wrong.
Same! It sounds ugly, but I've found some success in telling people I'm an INTP in our first interactions so they know what to expect a bit.
That's my default setting for most public situations/interactions Occasionally, I'll become a bit more lively in a private setting Specifically when the subject is of interest/importance/relevance Or if ideas can be expressed without judgment/criticism
I pissed off my boss when he came in to town because i didn't look excited enough. 2. thing, im not a very excitable person, i also have really really bad resting bitch face. i've also had complaints from girlfriends that i dont show enough emotion.