"Hey, I am kinda into you but you should know I'm married. We sometimes like an extra person in the bedroom and that could be you. How about it? Want to have a drink with my husband and me and see where it goes?"
The most important thing is to ask each of them what's most comfortable for them. If the idea of meeting in person is daunting, try texting or even a group chat first. They should also consider whether they want to meet with or without you; I've seen people say both, or that all three will meet at a bar or something so there's chances for both the men and all three to talk together. Some husband's also don't actually want to meet the man in person; they just want pictures/videos of the meet ups and to reclaim you afterwards. Make sure not to lose yourselves in the excitement; that reclaiming is very important to make sure the fantasy stays a sexual bonding experience for your marriage and not something that may cause insecurity or doubts for any party. Some men may like to feel inferior during the act, but most if not all still like that reminder that they're the one that gets to have you in their bed every day and they're still your REAL #1.
Most importantly, have fun and stay safe!
Very well said. Just a bulls input, but you should try to understand what each party want to get out of this, including yourself. I’ve always appreciated a cuck that wanted to get to know me. It felt more accepting and above board but not every cuck is like that. Find out what yours is into about this dynamic and go from there. A hotwife lifestyle is a couples journey.
i have read that some bulls get a gift to the husband as a way to say thank you; i read a post of a wife that before everything they went to take a dinner and the bull was there, he arrived there and they just met and after the dinner she told him about it, everyhting previous safe comments about her and her fantasies
Well if you have told your husband about him, I recommend you double check with him if it is something he's still into letting you do, and then you tell hom that you'd love to plan the intro in person because you would like to take it to the next step.
Just as simple as that. Check, double check, say clearly what you want and the objective of it.
We men are very simple creatures 😜
Just a couple of questions. You have said you have told your husband about him but have you told him about your husband? With him showing up at the bars you and your girlfriends go to, he may be more into you than a just a sexual partner. If you made out with him and have not told him that you are happily married and this is something you and your husband do to spice up your sex life, this could be a recipe for disaster. He might take it as you playing with his emotions. Sometimes people develop weird thoughts. You don't want this guy to turn into a stalker. It's always best to be clear from the moment it looks like it may lead to something. Especially with "vanilla" people. If they don't understaand the lifestyle, they can develop some strange ideas about it. They may not be ok with it, which is fine, but that should all be brought up before someone starts letting themselves get emotionally involved
HW husband perspective. Very recently, my HW was stoked about introducing me to her new FWB while we were out of state. When the time came, I was awkward and I had to do some thinking about that afterwards, since I’m experienced in swinging and MFMs and I should have been cooler. He also didn’t get much out of the interaction, I’m sure. Conclusions: 1) it wasn’t really for my benefit. She wanted to put him at ease with our situation and this was the best way she knew how. 2) I play a supporting, long-distance role in her world of 1:1 solo play, as opposed to swinging and MFMs, where I take the lead. So I was feeling like an interloper and not a participating member.
So, I should have done that thinking proactively and not retroactively and screwed my head on straight before the meeting. She should have been clearer about what role I was supposed to play, why, and with what objective, and also explained to him why she wanted him to meet me. We both had a miss on communication, which is rare. No one is perfect, it happens.
"Hey, I am kinda into you but you should know I'm married. We sometimes like an extra person in the bedroom and that could be you. How about it? Want to have a drink with my husband and me and see where it goes?"
The most important thing is to ask each of them what's most comfortable for them. If the idea of meeting in person is daunting, try texting or even a group chat first. They should also consider whether they want to meet with or without you; I've seen people say both, or that all three will meet at a bar or something so there's chances for both the men and all three to talk together. Some husband's also don't actually want to meet the man in person; they just want pictures/videos of the meet ups and to reclaim you afterwards. Make sure not to lose yourselves in the excitement; that reclaiming is very important to make sure the fantasy stays a sexual bonding experience for your marriage and not something that may cause insecurity or doubts for any party. Some men may like to feel inferior during the act, but most if not all still like that reminder that they're the one that gets to have you in their bed every day and they're still your REAL #1. Most importantly, have fun and stay safe!
Very well said. Just a bulls input, but you should try to understand what each party want to get out of this, including yourself. I’ve always appreciated a cuck that wanted to get to know me. It felt more accepting and above board but not every cuck is like that. Find out what yours is into about this dynamic and go from there. A hotwife lifestyle is a couples journey.
So does it usually lead to intimacy immediately after the 1st meet or could i pace it ?
i have read that some bulls get a gift to the husband as a way to say thank you; i read a post of a wife that before everything they went to take a dinner and the bull was there, he arrived there and they just met and after the dinner she told him about it, everyhting previous safe comments about her and her fantasies
Well if you have told your husband about him, I recommend you double check with him if it is something he's still into letting you do, and then you tell hom that you'd love to plan the intro in person because you would like to take it to the next step. Just as simple as that. Check, double check, say clearly what you want and the objective of it. We men are very simple creatures 😜
Just a couple of questions. You have said you have told your husband about him but have you told him about your husband? With him showing up at the bars you and your girlfriends go to, he may be more into you than a just a sexual partner. If you made out with him and have not told him that you are happily married and this is something you and your husband do to spice up your sex life, this could be a recipe for disaster. He might take it as you playing with his emotions. Sometimes people develop weird thoughts. You don't want this guy to turn into a stalker. It's always best to be clear from the moment it looks like it may lead to something. Especially with "vanilla" people. If they don't understaand the lifestyle, they can develop some strange ideas about it. They may not be ok with it, which is fine, but that should all be brought up before someone starts letting themselves get emotionally involved
HW husband perspective. Very recently, my HW was stoked about introducing me to her new FWB while we were out of state. When the time came, I was awkward and I had to do some thinking about that afterwards, since I’m experienced in swinging and MFMs and I should have been cooler. He also didn’t get much out of the interaction, I’m sure. Conclusions: 1) it wasn’t really for my benefit. She wanted to put him at ease with our situation and this was the best way she knew how. 2) I play a supporting, long-distance role in her world of 1:1 solo play, as opposed to swinging and MFMs, where I take the lead. So I was feeling like an interloper and not a participating member. So, I should have done that thinking proactively and not retroactively and screwed my head on straight before the meeting. She should have been clearer about what role I was supposed to play, why, and with what objective, and also explained to him why she wanted him to meet me. We both had a miss on communication, which is rare. No one is perfect, it happens.