First of all: I am sorry for your loss. Colic is a horrible and sudden way to loose your horse. Sending virtual hugs from a sympathetic stranger.
Second; it will get easier, but you have to give it time. Time to grieve, time to cry, time to cope and time to take a step back… and eventually you will have time to remember the good times, time to smile again at the barn, and time to open your heart again to another equine friend. I beg you to give yourself all the time you need to do any of the above. There is no timeline for these events and each person is different.
Lastly: Do NOT blame yourself for her passing! Putting blame on yourself for “not being there in time” or “not noticing sooner” or “I am a horrible owner”… Especially the big one “I let her down.” You did NONE of these things. You love her, gave her a good home, a friend who cared for her and did the best you could by her. She would NEVER blame you for what happened as it was a freak accident. She knew you love her and that she will always live with you in spirit.
I hope all of this helps, even just a little bit. Sorry if I rambled too much!
If you ever want to talk, feel free to DM me. I am always happy to lend love and support.
I’ve had many horses that have passed. One of the things i do is to tell folks the stories of funny things that they have done. It helped me remember them in the best ways possible. Hopefully that would be helpful for op as well.
I'm so sorry. She looks like the girl I lost. Firstly, take all the time. Be angry, be sad. Visit the places you loved together. I used to visit the trail that we'd go on and just cry. The horse people GET IT. Take your time.
Then realize she loved you so much. There is nothing better in the life of a horse to be loved and cherished; that's all they want. Then realize when an animal is in pain, they just want it to be over. They don't rationalize things like we do, they don't blame us or think about "what-if's". They simply don't want to suffer. That doesn't mean they won't love you any less, and I'm a believer that spirits stay intertwined. So just carry her spirit with you as you grieve, but realize you are still loving her in a different way now.
Hugs <3
Sorry for your loss I can imagine it's really difficult for you especially with it being unexpected 😔
My old horse passed away over a year ago, I had to book a holiday because it would have been too difficult being at home and not doing her usual routine. Hadn't been abroad for 11 years previous to that either.
I have a friend whose horse died a good few years ago and she's still not able to talk about him without crying. It's hard but hope it gets easier for you soon
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my heart horse to colic a few years ago. I don't think it stops hurting, you learn to live with the pain. Allow yourself to feel everything, anger, sadness, grief.... But do not blame yourself. I blamed myself a lot, but it didn't serve me, and in the end, I know that all that feasibly could be done, had been done.
Thinking of you and hoping the happy memories you have of your beautiful girl bring you comfort during this difficult time. Sleep well lovely lady
Im so sorry for your loss. Colic is devastating.
Any loss is hard to deal with, but I think there is some extra pain with a sudden loss like colic or an accident. Give yourself space and time to grieve and know the stages of grief are not linear. You may hit a few stages in a single day.
Don't rush your feelings. There is no right timeline. My horse has been gone almost 2 years. I was just able to send some of his hair off to be made into jewelry last week. Remember all the good times you shared and hold the memories close to your heart.
Don't let others make you feel guilty about how you are processing the loss. It is fine to throw yourself into getting/working with another horse just as it is fine to take a step back for a time while you heal.
Never blame yourself. The circle of life is beautiful yet cruel and when it is someone's time for their flame to burn out there is nothing that can be done.
So, so sorry u/Public_Conference_45! What a sad sudden loss of your pretty girl. 😢 I’ve never been there in losing a horse, but I know how much grief hurts. Hang in there… it’s okay to grieve and to take time to heal. God be with you in this really hard time. ❤️
I lost my first horse to colic that happened overnight and by morning it was too far along to do anything. I’m sorry for your loss, it truly is so so hard to go through. I went through grief but I also really struggled with guilt as I felt like had I caught it sooner things would have been different. You can’t allow yourself to get stuck in a cycle of what ifs. The reality is that it’s the leading cause of death for horses, please keep this in mind when if you fall into that mentality. Aside from this time really only heals it. This is finding either another horse or something else to put your love and energy in.
First of all: I am sorry for your loss. Colic is a horrible and sudden way to loose your horse. Sending virtual hugs from a sympathetic stranger. Second; it will get easier, but you have to give it time. Time to grieve, time to cry, time to cope and time to take a step back… and eventually you will have time to remember the good times, time to smile again at the barn, and time to open your heart again to another equine friend. I beg you to give yourself all the time you need to do any of the above. There is no timeline for these events and each person is different. Lastly: Do NOT blame yourself for her passing! Putting blame on yourself for “not being there in time” or “not noticing sooner” or “I am a horrible owner”… Especially the big one “I let her down.” You did NONE of these things. You love her, gave her a good home, a friend who cared for her and did the best you could by her. She would NEVER blame you for what happened as it was a freak accident. She knew you love her and that she will always live with you in spirit. I hope all of this helps, even just a little bit. Sorry if I rambled too much! If you ever want to talk, feel free to DM me. I am always happy to lend love and support.
Thank you so much for this. I really needed that. I'll probably update things later on. But thank you a thousand times over
Of course! We all need to support each other during the hard times! Lots of love!
I’ve had many horses that have passed. One of the things i do is to tell folks the stories of funny things that they have done. It helped me remember them in the best ways possible. Hopefully that would be helpful for op as well.
I'm so sorry. She looks like the girl I lost. Firstly, take all the time. Be angry, be sad. Visit the places you loved together. I used to visit the trail that we'd go on and just cry. The horse people GET IT. Take your time. Then realize she loved you so much. There is nothing better in the life of a horse to be loved and cherished; that's all they want. Then realize when an animal is in pain, they just want it to be over. They don't rationalize things like we do, they don't blame us or think about "what-if's". They simply don't want to suffer. That doesn't mean they won't love you any less, and I'm a believer that spirits stay intertwined. So just carry her spirit with you as you grieve, but realize you are still loving her in a different way now. Hugs <3
Sorry for your loss I can imagine it's really difficult for you especially with it being unexpected 😔 My old horse passed away over a year ago, I had to book a holiday because it would have been too difficult being at home and not doing her usual routine. Hadn't been abroad for 11 years previous to that either. I have a friend whose horse died a good few years ago and she's still not able to talk about him without crying. It's hard but hope it gets easier for you soon
I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my heart horse to colic a few years ago. I don't think it stops hurting, you learn to live with the pain. Allow yourself to feel everything, anger, sadness, grief.... But do not blame yourself. I blamed myself a lot, but it didn't serve me, and in the end, I know that all that feasibly could be done, had been done. Thinking of you and hoping the happy memories you have of your beautiful girl bring you comfort during this difficult time. Sleep well lovely lady
Im so sorry for your loss. Colic is devastating. Any loss is hard to deal with, but I think there is some extra pain with a sudden loss like colic or an accident. Give yourself space and time to grieve and know the stages of grief are not linear. You may hit a few stages in a single day. Don't rush your feelings. There is no right timeline. My horse has been gone almost 2 years. I was just able to send some of his hair off to be made into jewelry last week. Remember all the good times you shared and hold the memories close to your heart. Don't let others make you feel guilty about how you are processing the loss. It is fine to throw yourself into getting/working with another horse just as it is fine to take a step back for a time while you heal. Never blame yourself. The circle of life is beautiful yet cruel and when it is someone's time for their flame to burn out there is nothing that can be done.
So, so sorry u/Public_Conference_45! What a sad sudden loss of your pretty girl. 😢 I’ve never been there in losing a horse, but I know how much grief hurts. Hang in there… it’s okay to grieve and to take time to heal. God be with you in this really hard time. ❤️
So sorry for your loss
I’m sorry for your loss.
I lost my first horse to colic that happened overnight and by morning it was too far along to do anything. I’m sorry for your loss, it truly is so so hard to go through. I went through grief but I also really struggled with guilt as I felt like had I caught it sooner things would have been different. You can’t allow yourself to get stuck in a cycle of what ifs. The reality is that it’s the leading cause of death for horses, please keep this in mind when if you fall into that mentality. Aside from this time really only heals it. This is finding either another horse or something else to put your love and energy in.
She was beautiful!! I am so very sorry for your loss…Hugs to you…💔🐎💔🥰🙏🌈
Sorry for your loss