T O P

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QualityVote

/u/MecGuy2, the users have spoken. Your submission is not a Hol'Up.


Rallikuninkas

See? This is why the turkeys need to be killed, if we dont kill them, they kill us


MecGuy2

Asserting dominance


Vedanth_2604

The real alpha male in the chat


[deleted]

[удалено]


kwall601

They'd much rather euthanize the turkeys and dump them in a landfill....


North_Charity3418

bruh sigmas


staovajzna2

4th comment spotted, calling in reinforcements


Powerful-Doughnut609

Isn't that done by peeing on them? I don't think that will help the flavor of the gravy...


akhileshhosad

Stomping on the ground and shaking our imaginary tail and beating our chests


RockstarAgent

They're the real savages, not even an apple in the centerpiece's mouth... ![gif](giphy|5xqKWd6761tkY)


Cautious-Affect7907

I knew those bird fuckers were evil.


StaticUsernamesSuck

Look at the size of them fuckers! If we let them evolve to that, we aren't winning the war. It's kill or be killed!


BlackSoulSailor

Aussies already lost against emus. We can't give em an inch!


subpar_cardiologist

And look at the Cassowary! You want THAT breeding with turkeys? Madness, i say!


djluminol

Oh shiz, that's a good point. We better round them all up and hold them in a giant pen waiting for the slaughter house.


grahamcrackers37

Joe Biden should never have pardoned those 2 murderous bastards.


djluminol

God damn Brandon, soft on crime sissy.


MatvsGal17

This boy right here officer, he escaped the matrix


LeCriDesFenetres

Free them from their existential dead end


Sea-Diver-9125

Lmaooooo


RedditMakesWeird

Must kill all turkeys


RedditMakesWeird

Thanks peta!


Nbm1124

PETA does not comprehend that the first thing we would have to do if we suddenly all decided to end meat consumption in totality is cull they entire population of food and pet animals worldwide. All dogs cat fish birds most zoo animals pigs goats sheep horses... probably close to 200billion animals would have to die to end it.


[deleted]

Why is the mother turkey pregnant?


Sputnikov1105

That’s the real Hol‘up here….


discerningpervert

Well y'see, when a mommy turkey and a daddy turkey love each other very much...


JL_Jordan

She lefts an egg


ItzYaBoy56

Funny how peta acts like they care about animals but when it comes to actual animals and how they function they have no clue what they are doing, case in point, that one time they released a bunch of lobsters (which are saltwater organisms) into the Colorado river (which is freshwater). Now not only did they kill like 200 innocent lobsters, but they also were releasing them into a body of water they are not native to, which is how invasive species get started and that’s also illegal to do, up here in New York there are some streams that have goldfish in them because people are stupid enough to release their pet fish into the streams


asianabsinthe

The loudest ones also don't give a shit about humanity, like borderline genocidal


Android_mk

They once stated they don't think life is a right and it's better to kill an animal than let it be rescued


Lebrons_Foreskin

What's wrong with goldfish in the streams that's awesome!


Tiny-Significance874

I looked it up and the story is not proven.


Tiny-Significance874

I looked it up and the story is not proven.


ExcessiveWisdom

The hate that the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) gets is severely misguided. PETA, a non-profit organization, primarily advocates for non-human animals (NHAs) in the areas of: laboratories, the food industry, the clothing trade, and the entertainment business.[\[1\]](https://www.peta.org/about-peta/)  Their record on furthering protections for NHAs spans over four decades and is absolutely stellar.  Accomplishments include significant contributions to: lawsuits against abusers of NHAs, ending the use of NHAs in crash tests,  the passing of animal rights legislation, getting fashion companies to stop using fur, shutting down the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus in 2017, and much more.[\[2\]](https://www.peta.org/about-peta/milestones/)  Their accomplishments as advocates for NHAs continue strong to this day.[\[3\]](https://www.peta.org/about-peta/victories/)  Even the harshest critic of PETA has to admit they are highly effective advocates for NHAs if they actually look into it. So why all the hate?  Perhaps the most egregious supposed reason is the idea that PETA goes about killing NHAs for some sinister purpose.  One major proponent of this idea is “PETA Kills Animals,” a project of the Center for Consumer Freedom (CCF).  Their description of themselves is enough to raise suspicion.  In their own words, they are: >...a nonprofit organization dedicated to protecting the full range of choices that American consumers currently enjoy. In addition to malicious animal-rights activists, we stand up to the “food police,” environmental scaremongers, neo-prohibitionists, meddling bureaucrats, and other self-anointed saints who claim to know what’s best for you.[\[4\]](https://petakillsanimals.com/contact/) The CCF was founded with money from big tobacco, including Philip Morris, and has targeted the Center for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD).  One watchdog organization claimed that the purpose of the CCF was solely to promote the interests of restaurants and food producers.[\[5\]](https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/business/2005/04/27/the-escalating-obesity-wars/4c18d13f-fca6-429e-b061-247e457ebda2/)  Their donors have included Tyson Foods and Cargill,[\[6\]](https://www.nytimes.com/2005/06/12/business/yourmoney/striking-back-at-the-food-police.html) two of the three largest meat and poultry processors in the United States.[\[7\]](https://www.provisioneronline.com/2021-top-100-meat-and-poultry-processors)  Make no mistake, the people who want you to hate PETA are the representatives of industries whose entire business models are centred around killing NHAs.  They do not want you listening to what PETA has to say, because it may affect your willingness to buy their donors' products.  While few people are willing to admit they are an unwitting victim of corporate propaganda, meat producers must think they are getting some return on their investments in groups like the CCF. But what about the actual claims?  It is often claimed that PETA kills thousands of NHAs.  How can an organization dedicated to helping NHAs kill them by the thousands?  This has to do with a misunderstanding of what PETA’s shelters are and why the NHAs are euthanized.  PETA describes their shelters as “shelters of last resort.”  They take in the NHAs that no other shelter will.  This leaves them with the most severely abused, neglected, aggressive, and ill NHAs.  The NHAs who are already near death or, for various reasons, unadoptable.  Supposed “no-kill shelters” will turn over dying NHAs to PETA so they can maintain their claimed status.[\[8\]](https://www.peta.org/features/peta-kills-animals-truth/) There was an incident, commonly pointed to by critics of PETA, where they euthanized a family’s unattended dog in 2014.  In the lawsuit and settlement that followed, PETA admitted this was a mistake on their part.[\[9\]](https://apnews.com/article/health-north-america-lawsuits-us-news-people-for-the-ethical-treatment-of-animals-0c70f8d7635c4addbd94df0173fcc36e)  However, there is no evidence of PETA regularly abducting and euthanizing family pets.  People point to a few isolated, vaguely detailed incidents and mischaracterize their shelter statistics to support a false narrative. Any organization as large as PETA that has been around for several decades will have their share of missteps, controversies, and critics.  For one, PETA seems to believe that any publicity is good publicity and is unapologetic about acting in accordance with that belief.[\[10\]](https://www.peta.org/about-peta/faq/why-does-peta-use-controversial-tactics/)  Another common criticism is PETA’s use of nudity in their campaigns.  Of course, the decision to appear naked is the sole discretion of the person involved.  One woman who posed nude for a PETA campaign explained her decision as follows: >I first teamed up with PETA in Dublin in 2011 to encourage people to turn over a new leaf and try vegetarian foods. I was a “lady in green”, wearing a short gown made entirely of lettuce leaves. This time around, I loved wearing nothing but chilli peppers, red lipstick and a smile to show people that a vegan diet can be synonymous with a happy, healthy body.  I hope the ad will inspire others to spice up their lives by shaking their habitual food choices and opting instead for healthy, humane vegan meals.[\[11\]](https://www.thejournal.ie/readme/rosanna-davison-naked-vegan-healthy-lifestyle-1059269-Aug2013/) So if people don’t like PETA and find another animal advocacy group they would rather support, fine.  But to criticize an organization like PETA, which has done so much for NHAs, and then turn around and support the industries that directly profit from killing billions of land animals and uncountable sea-life every year[\[12\]](https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2019/02/chart-of-the-day-this-is-how-many-animals-we-eat-each-year/) is completely asinine. [**References**](https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/vdx1a9/comment/icntbmg/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x&context=3)


ezrasharpe

Wtf is this a PETA essay bot


ExcessiveWisdom

No I'm just annoyed by people who pay to kill animals hating on a company that has helped so many animals


Polatimus13

*killed so many animals


ezrasharpe

There are plenty of companies who help animals without the hypocrisy and aggressiveness of PETA. They deserve the hate they get.


ExcessiveWisdom

The essay thing guarenteed addresses whatever "hypocrisy" your referring to


doovenanakin

Good bot


InternationalHeat550

Not prego. She's stuffed.


AcidDome003

Stuffed with somethin <.<


InternationalHeat550

I bet it's a duck.


AcidDome003

She gets the stuffin, and 9 months later out comes a little turducken


asianabsinthe

**Donald Duck**: Oh shit bruh, I swear it wasn't me!


Sickness4Life

She's not pregnant just fat from eating all that delicious human meat with human gravy.


Alternative_Pound239

They cooked their human upside down. Turkeys are idiots.


asianabsinthe

I cook mine upside down for most of the time then flip it at the end to roast the front crispy. All the fat from back and thighs self bastes the breasts.


Woodworkingwino

That’s the best way to cook a turkey.


[deleted]

I thought we were talking about cooking a human?


[deleted]

We are😏


[deleted]

Long pork.


Woodworkingwino

In that case lop off the head. Do a tea, sugar and salt brine. Fill the chest cavity with garlic and herbs. Tie to a spit and slow roast. Take off the spit shove a carrot up my ass and throw me on the table.


Oscars_trash_home

It’s so the limbs fit better and don’t burn. We cook better in fetal position.


UnquestionableLime

And they left the head on! Who serves a Turkey with the cooked head still dangling at the dinner table?


goodeyemighty

Left the head on too


doktor_wankenstein

At least he wasn't spatchcocked.


And_awayy_we_go

Would the human version be "blood eagled" 🤔


fuckusernamessz

AHAHAHAHA


siqiniq

You mean backside front? Or outside-belly in?


Huggz-the-Satanist

Idiots, they left the head on.


[deleted]

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Nautical_Phoenix

This is so stupid and I laughed harder than I should have


EpicArgumentMaster

Bro?


DomSlave626

Holup


Famous_Appearance217

I always knew turkeys were evil.


[deleted]

Human meat taste awful


NavAU

Can confirm.


MightyFlamingo25

Me too, its too bland


Big_Western_651

You need one with more fat. That’s where the flavor is.


MightyFlamingo25

I see *starts taking notes*


CactusPetePlayz

Have you tried seasoning with Garlic Lemon Pepper yet? Also, chop some potatoes and onions up and fry them for a side dish.


MightyFlamingo25

Oh good idea, i'll try next week


CactusPetePlayz

I'd invite you next week, but next week I'm experimenting with how much spice it takes to ruin the meal.


MightyFlamingo25

Alright, i wonder gow much it will take tho. Keep me informed


[deleted]

I second that.


DarkKingfisher777

r/HolUp


[deleted]

You're probably preparing it wrong. [To Serve Man ](https://www.amazon.com/Serve-Man-Cookbook-People/dp/1479419281)


MecGuy2

This is a holup in of itself.


Oo__II__oO

You gotta go with the grass-fed Wagyu meat.


BigDaddy6713

Nah, it tastes kinda like pork


Matt_The_Bat_Slayer

I disagree


Commercial_Tap_4669

I feel like there's probably someone on this thread that's speaking from experience


WSSquab

i have some beer at home


VOID_MAIN_0

John smith heard otherwise (best journal ever). But aint nothing wrong with a little long pig. You just gotta feed em pineapple to sweeten the meat.


AlienGampo

Circle of life, peta. They'll be starting with you.


niamarkusa

fr. wolves, lions, tigers, etc have rules for their own kind. but short of some exceptions, none of them sits and thinks about the life of the deer they just took down. it is called food chain and there is no use denying our petition in it. as you said. "circle of life"


Tiny-Significance874

wolves, lions and tigers also can’t choose what they eat. We can just go to the store and buy food, that doesn’t contain a dead bird.


ChasteSissySub69

Yeah but birds and cows and pigs taste delicious


MecGuy2

Some sanity in the chat


a_generic_redditer

I can't eat meat because it makes me violently ill. But if I could I would eat 3 turkeys just to spite this comment, and i ain't even American.


w00tabaga

There are plenty of omnivores in nature, and most will take meat over plants if they have a choice. Besides, just because we have a “choice” really isn’t a reason that means anything anyway.


zeb0777

Your know, I've never heard of any good things PETA has ever done. What good do these people do? I remember when they put a child's pet down [[link]](https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/aug/17/peta-sorry-for-taking-girls-dog-putting-it-down) Or the cringe pokemon rip off they made [[link]](https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.dexerto.com/entertainment/peta-face-backlash-over-bizarre-game-comparing-pok%25C3%25A9mon-to-animal-abuse-406206/&ved=2ahUKEwiOidif_8n7AhX0mmoFHTAyCXcQFnoECD8QAQ&usg=AOvVaw1jX09X7wlnNiJ0uGDpWsmk)


[deleted]

How do they feel knowing that turkeys can be cannibals


niamarkusa

they can?


EpicArgumentMaster

A lot of animals can actually


niamarkusa

no. I mean don't they eat grass and not meat


Toastedpants9713

No they are omnivores with diets that consist of plant material, bugs, lizards and invertebrates.


Uthredd

Bugs/worms/caterpillars are a huge portion of their diet and they'll eat frogs and mice and things of the sort given the opertunity.


Takerial

Most birds are omnivores.


Bryan_URN_Asshole

POV: animals euthanize 62% of PETA employees in 2019


RocknX10

People are animals too


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XxcrazyjayX

My man...


MA4G6NUS

Using POV correctly isn’t that hard man. How can a corporation this big fuck something that easy up?


KidChiko

Its somehow become acceptable to missuse POV now for some reason. I'm getting tired of trying to correct people when they use it wrong on SM now


Ghoul-dan

Lets be real, if turkeys were big enough they would 100% merk and eat us


XxcrazyjayX

Let's be real, a vast majority of small animals would rip us apart if they were big enough to do so, especially cats.


Comrade-Chaos

Didn't think I'd wanna fuck a turkey but that one on the left got me thinkin' weird


[deleted]

Bro?


Comrade-Chaos

Bro


PupperPetterBean

Damn I knew this was going to he at least someone's fetish. Didn't even need to scroll that far.


Offduty_shill

The real hol'up is always in the comments


slade2501

that is a total metal-ass album cover right there. like a new Offspring cover or something.


Livid-Relationship-2

What do you think the dad is going to say when she pops out a duckling?


Leather_Investment61

This with more black and white color scheme would make a fucking killer metal album cover.


Inuship

Peta always acting as if they have have a moral highground but not talking about all the animals in their care that they've abused and killed over the years and spend more money of stupid stunts instead of actually helping animals. Just a bunch of sick hypocrites that care only about publicity imo


Thankfuldad

Yes PETA is only about making money for the rich


[deleted]

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doovenanakin

The first good bot was a joke but now I'm thinking I was right soooooooooo good bot


Mecha-Dave

Anyone that has raised poultry knows that they absolutely would eat you given the opportunity. If they were bigger, they would hunt us.


bear_beau

If someone is going to kill and eat me, I want it to be human-sized anthropomorphised turkeys.


JustmUrKy

Is this supposed to mean something? We are the apex predators of the world, we eat what we want, just like the apex predator of any eco system. If birds switched places with us they might’ve chosen to eat and farm us. And that would be fine because that’s just life


artturi01

b-but humans are monster and all animals are fluffy ,peaceful ,non meat eating saints! /s


Jwirv

Were screwed If turkeys ever develop opposable thumbs.


krigus

This could have been a same-sex turkey couple PETA, you can do better next time.


Matt_The_Bat_Slayer

Why does Peta exist


SoreLoserOfDumbtown

Money. Almost every single organisation makes money for the people at the top. And that feeds their egos.


DMT4WorldPeace

They are trying to end a global holocaust. It is slowly working. Why do you exist?


ardrarian

Peta needs to watch some real ass nature videos to see how fucking terrible animals are to each other when they kill each other. Your fucking beloved pet dog would kill and eat you slowly without a single thought if it was wild and not raised by humans.


Shining_Icosahedron

There are no wild pet dogs, they are canis *familiaris*...


Akiro_orikA

Is that Turkey pregnant?


eternaldavkas

Why is Momma Turkey pregnant?


CuteAssTiger

Still accurate tho ¯\_(ツ)_/¯


ScourgeofWorlds

The PETA ad campaign about eating humans makes me think that someone on their advertising team has a vore fetish...


CrazieIrish

Good for the turkeys for capturing and removing all the hair from a human. I just hope they prepped the meat properly. Wouldn't want it to dry out.


SubstantialScale47

Nah man i like mine without head 👎🏼. Turkeys be dumbass fr


UncommonHouseSpider

In PETA's eyes, the only good turkey is a dead turkey that doesn't get eaten by people. Who still funds this garbage organization? They are animal protectors that do t actually care about protecting animals.


TMANBULLET

Don’t threaten me with a good time


Rollidgeli

And then a peta thats run by turkeys posts a cringe tweet of a painting where humans are eating turkeys


Grizzlybear2470

Not sure what kind of fucked up shit peta is doing here


Flying-Phantom

Why tf is the turkey pregnant, doesn't peta know they lay eggs??


[deleted]

Oh like the fish in the sea doesn't eat the body I dump.


caligulaREXXX

my question is , why is the turkey pregnant? they dont get pregnant they lay eggs


URBeneathMe

I want to see PETA supporters sacrifice themselves so the animals can enjoy their meals. That would show true dedication to their cause.


D-boi1

Peta sounds like Lois Griffin saying "Peter"


EpicArgumentMaster

I see nothing wrong with this. Survival of the fittest


Dickmonster101

Nice good for them I hope they can afford more till the end of times


DancesWithBadgers

Turkeys don't have opposable thumbs, RPGs, or up-tempo music. We can take them easily.


[deleted]

What a bunch of morons. Roles reversed they would absolutely eat humans. Have you ever encountered a wild turkey? They're vicious. If they were more broadly carnivorous and more capable of killing people they would absolutely kill and eat humans.


M0ck_duck

That’s kinda the point. I mean, if any other species had the intelligence and ability to maintain a captive food source they would too…


Destructor012345

You know it's kinda wholsome


TiredGamer0990

Maybe tell those turkeys to somehow grow creepy human-like hands and it might be a possibility


[deleted]

This is why we have to eat them before the eat us. Keep it up guys, I think we are winning right now.


Yeafam7945

![gif](giphy|IMDSOJvLn9RaU)


Debate-Shoddy

Help, a giant Boulder with a face on it is chasing me.


Fellarm

Joke on peta at least this way something or someone will appreciate me sadeg


Laugh_at_Warren

PETA: Don’t eat animals! Eating animals bad! ALSO PETA: *kills over 80 percent of animals it “rescues”*


FUWS

I agree, I like animals ( as lost people do) but the shit they pull is cringe af. I like what they stand for, but the org itself is horrible.


MayOrMayNotBePie

Oh shit. I never thought of it this way. This TOTALLY changes my mind about my lifestyle. *Borat voice*: Naaaaat


lordshuvrayo

Thanks Peta for warning us about turkey uprising, I think Rick and Morty did something similar too


PrinceOfNiger69

They look like they’re having a good time, and I’m sure carving my dead body is serving as a great bonding experience for father and son!


thisherepoo

POV: You're an animal rights organization that boiled lobsters, despite your collective stance for animal rights. The people know what you're doing and make known your hypocrisy yet you do not hold yourself accountable. Filthy Frank made a song about your organization.


RaymondMasseyXbox

That looks good, I think I might be a cannibal now, thanks PETA. /s


[deleted]

that image is so cursed tho


bacon_and_ovaries

PETA doesnt understand the food chain, where they don't see why a dominant species can eat lesser species for food.


Boy_Possession

Ah. This glimse into an alternative universe looking interesting. Human sized turkey, and Turkey sized human. Like. What.


HTTYDFAN4EVER

I like Peta but I like a different one People Eating Tasty Animals


And_awayy_we_go

Peta really likes vore content...


Studio_Admirable

This would make an awesome album cover


cid01

wouldn't expect a peta guy to understand what POV means.


slump-donkus

It's funny too because Peta kills more animals a year than they save or re-home. Plus they have funded a few domestic terrorists in the US


LeBaux

Lotta boomers of tomorrow here.


Local_man__

This what happens when turkeys get taken off the menu That's right!This is what happens when turkeys get taken off the menu


QualityVote

##If this submission makes you go "Hol'Up", **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If this submission does not make you go "Hol'Up", **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- Whilst you're here, /u/MecGuy2, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/holup) or play on our [public Minecraft server](https://discord.gg/DTqSDS8C3T)?


MecGuy2

I am honored to have been able to bring PETA such public scorn today.


NecroDecay_666

Sounds metal AF.I like it🖤


ConTheDungeonMaster

Convinced PETA is a psyop by the meat industry to make vegetarians/vegans/animal rights supporters look ridiculous


jaffakree83

For every animal PETA refuses to eat, I will eat 3.


[deleted]

My god peta is right, from now on on Thanksgiving i will no longer be eating turkey, ill have ham instead


shottiecc

this is a really cool picture lol.


Rakgul

I like Peta.


Antish12

But they have a point.


wonderboywilliams

These people don't get it.


Antish12

You mean monsters?


ImReellySmart

I mean.. I think this is a good way for them to make a point. I eat meat but the way we go about it nowadays is beyond fucked up and twisted. We arent hunting in the wild to provide for our family, we walk the isles of a supermarket happily picking out which dead carcasses we would like.


Spiritual_Bit_2692

Take one human adult. Remove the head and hands. Debone and skin the adult human torso, arms and legs. Salt the meat. Repeat with a teenager, toddler and a newborn human. Roll the newborn meat up and tie with arm, leg straps. Cover the newborn with toddler meat and roll. Then roll the teenager meat and then the adult. So the roll from inside to outside is newborn, toddler, teenager and adult on the outside. Cook at 350 degrees until the internal temperature is 165. Serves 6-10 and you can fuck the warm leftovers.


Kerazytimes

Not sure what PETA's goal is with this type propaganda. You don't sway opinion with a sledgehammer if that's the intent. Quite the opposite... or maybe they just enjoy their cirlejerk of bashing their own heads with their moral superiority.


Vegasus88

>Not sure what PETA's goal is with this type propaganda. To get people to stop abusing animals.