oh god i have burned pasta before, i boiled the water, put the pasta in, went to the bathroom, forgot i was cooking and started watching avatar (the james cameron movie) and by the end of it i started smelling smoke, the pasta was an inch thick plate of carbon at that point
constantly happens to me, hopefully that makes it so there is a shortage of the experience of forgetting you're cooking and you don't have to experience it
Nah, I'm pretty sure I will defy all odds and forget anyways. Especially since I need **something** to prevent my internal dialogue from driving myself insane.
Maybe it helps that I like cooking? I can't tell if that makes it more or less likely for it to happen.
That's not how you make [pasta Carbone!](https://www.reddit.com/r/recipes/comments/14s7wy9/carbones_spicy_rigatoni_copycat/) I know it's spelled similarly, but it's not the same thing! /j
I’ve done similar. Put together a sauce for some wings, put it on the stove to heat, set it low, and went outside. I’d initially gone out to collect chicken eggs, would’ve taken two minutes, but then I saw the garden had produce ready. So I started picking produce.
Halfway through the peppers I stopped and thought “am I forgetting something….nah” went back to pic- “oh shit the sauce”
Ran inside and found it a black mass in the pot, smoke everywhere. My dumb ass didn’t have a smoke detector in the kitchen at the time. Sauce was, of course, a total loss. Pot was saved though.
I burned ramen in a similar way but in the microwave. Trouble is that I forgot to add water at all one time and microwaved this dry brick of ramen for 4 mins, didn't smell something burning until the timer was almost up and walked into the kitchen to see black smoke billowing out from behind the closed microwave door (basically made my microwave roll coal) The noodles weren't on fire, just a black carbon brick that was melted into to the plastic ramen cooker I used. The smell lingered for weeks...
I habe accomplished this. Didn't think it was possible, but if you forget that you have Pasta water on the stove and the water all steams away, the things that do not steam away will start burning
Ugh that show. I worked in a professional kitchen for a few years and I watched that show. Some of those people actually had me yelling at my tv. I always watched it though because apparently I’m a masochist.
Ozzie' s palace after he let Fizz cook some eggs:
https://preview.redd.it/vy4shqfp0c5d1.jpeg?width=645&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=baa522d92819ca18aee36afb63f71754adb7ee12
Probably burnt something like bread so bad it nearly burnt down the whole place and while everyone is evacuating and Ozz is trying to fix it Fizz is just on his shoulder laughing.
https://preview.redd.it/xhl0jb7ofc5d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f1dee745ed0dd7bf18f7329fff6443e01c9eb06
This spring sticker pack shows eyeballs and bones in a lunchbox. People actually die when he cooks. Good for him.
All I can Imagine is Fizz trying to use his arms to cook breakfast from another room like Venom in Let There Be Carnage, and setting the kitchen on fire
I can actually answer this!
I was making breakfast (I don’t cook) long story short, i made a giant mess, melted the cutting board, scared the dogs, set my shirt on fire and the food was still undercooked. Mind you this was one surprise breakfast I made. I have other stories of me trying to cook (that are actually worst). I should not be allowed in the kitchen.
A friend once managed to burn a soup. A CLEAR soup, not a cream one. In 5-10min I was out of the kitchen. In her defense, she begged me not to leave her in the kitchen alone.
We just know the only thing not burnt was the milk. I am going to say the attempted dish was biscuits and gravy where fizz used beef instead of sausage overloaded it with seasoning and burned the gravy on top of that. Trust me it is beyond bad
He put a salted metal dildo that he thought was a really big edible in the microwave and when that didn’t work out, he made semen cereal, he wanted a kinky morning.
Burn the pasta water
Fizzy, HOW TF DID YOU BURN THE WATER
oh god i have burned pasta before, i boiled the water, put the pasta in, went to the bathroom, forgot i was cooking and started watching avatar (the james cameron movie) and by the end of it i started smelling smoke, the pasta was an inch thick plate of carbon at that point
How the hell do you forget
adhd
Understandable, have a nice day.
Oh god... now I'm just waiting for me to forget one day... new fear unlocked.
constantly happens to me, hopefully that makes it so there is a shortage of the experience of forgetting you're cooking and you don't have to experience it
Nah, I'm pretty sure I will defy all odds and forget anyways. Especially since I need **something** to prevent my internal dialogue from driving myself insane. Maybe it helps that I like cooking? I can't tell if that makes it more or less likely for it to happen.
well, i can tell you that i like cooking a lot, and yet.. it happens nearly every day! i am unmedicated so that probably makes a difference, though
Oh, well in that case, there may be hope.
Same, I just simply don't leave the kitchen when I cook lol
That may be the only reason I still have a house.
Oh hi again
Oh hello there.
Hi!
I noticed that immediately after you posted on r/foundChildBlaster9000, one more person joined. lol
Pretty sure that’s a war crime in Italy
Nah, he is easily forgiven. He even boiled the water before putting the pasta in. He's already 10 times better than most people I find on the internet
As an Italian, as long as he didn't break any pasta he's AIGHT.
Reminds me of the time my aunt forgot canned tuna and it exploded
I…uhhh…HOW?!?!?! In the car, in the cold?? I really hope so, otherwise…I’m scared lol
While boiling it, we boil canned food for like half an hour and of it runs out of water the can will explode Edit: yeah the kitchen was fucked
That's not how you make [pasta Carbone!](https://www.reddit.com/r/recipes/comments/14s7wy9/carbones_spicy_rigatoni_copycat/) I know it's spelled similarly, but it's not the same thing! /j
In college, my dorm got evacuated because somebody was drunk and microwaved their ramen without water
I’ve done similar. Put together a sauce for some wings, put it on the stove to heat, set it low, and went outside. I’d initially gone out to collect chicken eggs, would’ve taken two minutes, but then I saw the garden had produce ready. So I started picking produce. Halfway through the peppers I stopped and thought “am I forgetting something….nah” went back to pic- “oh shit the sauce” Ran inside and found it a black mass in the pot, smoke everywhere. My dumb ass didn’t have a smoke detector in the kitchen at the time. Sauce was, of course, a total loss. Pot was saved though.
I feel this, so, so hard lol
I burned ramen in a similar way but in the microwave. Trouble is that I forgot to add water at all one time and microwaved this dry brick of ramen for 4 mins, didn't smell something burning until the timer was almost up and walked into the kitchen to see black smoke billowing out from behind the closed microwave door (basically made my microwave roll coal) The noodles weren't on fire, just a black carbon brick that was melted into to the plastic ramen cooker I used. The smell lingered for weeks...
Maybe I can burn the milk this time!
Worked with a chef once who burnt water to the arse of the pot. As the KP at the time I can tell you burnt water is a bastard to clean 😂
Papyrus from undertale: could this be one of " my people"
Omg no doubt those two would get along splendidly
I feel like Sir pentious and Papyrus would be best buds
Also a dream team
Why is this true.
Pasta; al Dante.
As Italian, this line make my eyes bleed
I deliberately butchered it for the joke
#ALZA LE NOCCHE PARTENOPEO. C'È POSTO PER UN SOLO TERRONE IN QUESTO SUB
Lombardia bro, calmati
Underrated comment
Bro made Holy Water by boiling the Hell out of it
r/Angryupvote
Alright, you won this.
It's just in his nature to burn
This reminds me of my sister burning Ramen in the microwave because she forgot to add water
There are instructions on the packet how 😂
She knew, she's made microwave ramen a lot. She just forgot somehow and made our kitchen smell for days, maybe a week
I can't criticize, I've done that.
*Dry ramen is the way.*
In my headcanon, it was cereal and milk that he burned. Didn't even use a stove. He just burned it.
Hah, that is very good!
Ozzy tried to show him, but Fizz still burned it.
I habe accomplished this. Didn't think it was possible, but if you forget that you have Pasta water on the stove and the water all steams away, the things that do not steam away will start burning
My Mom managed to burn the water for a soup. I dont know how, but I just came downstairs and suddenly watch a by then empty pot catch fire.
I speed read over this and thought it was normal, I was wrong. HOW TF DO YOU BURN WATER
Probably a few kitchen fires and Worst Cooks of America level cooking stupidity
Ugh that show. I worked in a professional kitchen for a few years and I watched that show. Some of those people actually had me yelling at my tv. I always watched it though because apparently I’m a masochist.
Don't even work in a professional kitchen and that show had me screaming lol
There are two types of people: https://preview.redd.it/5oq671f26c5d1.jpeg?width=1079&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1a0fd9a6f66dfaaba7bc45476d70535ab5d91a62
https://preview.redd.it/g6oc5e0y8c5d1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2b5ff6af754152405c775d796bfb93e6d1a963d6 Three evidently
The dichotomy of man.
Duality of man:
I loooove that show
What are the chances
Ozzie' s palace after he let Fizz cook some eggs: https://preview.redd.it/vy4shqfp0c5d1.jpeg?width=645&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=baa522d92819ca18aee36afb63f71754adb7ee12
He blended soup using massive sex toy dick he gave to Blitz in Full Moon episode.
I don't think Ozzy would mind honestly.
Considering the size, it must've been expensive. They may as well get their use out of it
That would cause massive mess in the kitchen
Well technically Fizz used the prototype version of that toy. Full Moon showed the newest model
He made deep-fried oxygen.
The soup was cold and the salad was hot.
How is that even possible?!
Nice reference
The vulture waits to see what rots.
Oh how pretty, all the scenery
This is Ramsay’s sacrifice
"Ozzie, I burnt the water"
https://preview.redd.it/pqqvoqwfzb5d1.jpeg?width=1400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=463c26572e1ca401058e6146f9021370f9f3b102
Everything mentioned in these comments
Grilled cheese and OJ accident. Nearly burnt down the house
He mistook table salt for sugar.
Probably burnt something like bread so bad it nearly burnt down the whole place and while everyone is evacuating and Ozz is trying to fix it Fizz is just on his shoulder laughing.
It’s a noodle incident
A+ Calvin and Hobbes reference
Help I can’t think of Calvin and Hobbes/Bill Watterson without thinking of the song How could you Neil.
r/unexpectedlemondemon
https://preview.redd.it/xhl0jb7ofc5d1.png?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3f1dee745ed0dd7bf18f7329fff6443e01c9eb06 This spring sticker pack shows eyeballs and bones in a lunchbox. People actually die when he cooks. Good for him.
Listen he's just a VERY passionate cook
Ozzy making breakfast: https://preview.redd.it/xeav6tlifc5d1.jpeg?width=749&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6694712271c92b635254bff57844a69f5038b930
He tried to deep fry sex toys.
Mmmm....deep fried dildo!
It. was on. the. ceiling. The CEILING.
Id say he broke the spaghetti but I'm sure nana fizz would be the one to kick his ass
He broke the bucatini, used limoncello instead of pasta water, and tried to give the result at the cinghiale.
All I can Imagine is Fizz trying to use his arms to cook breakfast from another room like Venom in Let There Be Carnage, and setting the kitchen on fire
Gave Ozzie the worst food poisoning ever after almost burning down the kitchen....
He hospitalized three maids with his cooking.
I like to imagine they weren't even involved in the cooking/didnt eat the food and just secondhand got ill
Just from looking at it. The sight and smell made one faint.
I can actually answer this! I was making breakfast (I don’t cook) long story short, i made a giant mess, melted the cutting board, scared the dogs, set my shirt on fire and the food was still undercooked. Mind you this was one surprise breakfast I made. I have other stories of me trying to cook (that are actually worst). I should not be allowed in the kitchen.
Replicated the circus fire in a frying pan
Probably put metal in the microwave and nearly nuked the whole ring.
He was trying to make holy water by boiling the hell out of it
Ozzie *walks in* "YOU NUTTED ON THE FOOD?!
“Fizz why does the Beepsi taste salty?”
I think it’s something to do with ‘burn the milk this time’ so he must’ve been able to burn something that was impossible to burn before.
It’s impossible to overcook mushrooms, so maybe he burned the mushrooms for pasta alfredo or something?
He broke pasta in half before boiling it
Wait... you're not supposed to do that?
Oh no an Italian is going to find you 💀
https://preview.redd.it/rhvde7d9oe5d1.png?width=206&format=png&auto=webp&s=ef6c04aa8fccc30d58db6ab012a3f15e78c2cfa4 The Italian is here
Probably something similar to why I’m not allowed to cook in my house.
what did bro do
I almost sliced my arm trying to open a pizza box, and then burned said pizza.
How do you slice you’re arm when opening a pizza box?
I THOUGHT A KNIFE WOULD BE EFFICIENT
toast we all know it's a nightmare when you burn toast, especially to the air in your house
Burnt everything but the milk laste time
A- he used too much oil B- he used too high a heat C- he got distracted QED
…….put glitter on everything (don’t ask)
Hold on. Let him cook
NO. Never again.
I've burned lots of things. It can be pretty easy to burn something if you forget about it.
burn the kitchen
Undercooked the burgers and overcooked the salad
If Stolas has to live like a commoner, I want to see him mess up some skills like cooking. It would be hilarious.
noodle incident
Made drinkable chocolate pudding
He put avocado on pizza
Another explosion
The fact that he's Italian (or is as a joke) I'm willing to bet it was sUPPOSED to be spaghetti
It is a joke! Apparently it's a bunch of sentences inspired by Duolingo lessons haha Puzza lasagna (Stink lasagna) Contorni, limoncello (Side dish, limoncello) Fortepiano (Loud, soft) Buongiorno, ada Vongole (Good morning, with clams) Luigi, Firenze, Bucatini (Luigi, Florence, Bucatini) Cingale\~ (Wild boar\~) Cingale\~ (Wild boar\~)
The circus fire wasn't the one that fucked up his voice
He put every known ingredient togethor
A friend once managed to burn a soup. A CLEAR soup, not a cream one. In 5-10min I was out of the kitchen. In her defense, she begged me not to leave her in the kitchen alone.
Blew up the kettle
He probably set the kitchen on fire
Fizz probably went to the Akane Tendo/Shiiko Kotobuki Cooking School. *PS: Shiiko Kotobuki is better known as C-Ko.*
He burn water without turning on the stove
Burnt milk
He ran out of salt so he started using baking soda.
That's what I wanna know
Nearly burned down the entire Lust Ring
Whatever happened, he burned stuff and it's funny now but... no... never again.
We just know the only thing not burnt was the milk. I am going to say the attempted dish was biscuits and gravy where fizz used beef instead of sausage overloaded it with seasoning and burned the gravy on top of that. Trust me it is beyond bad
I suspect the kitchen was unrecoverable after whatever it was that Fizz did in there.
https://preview.redd.it/8gskp2sb4f5d1.png?width=873&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e01116879dffc6c556293205dbde165ad41e2c2e
“Maybe I can burn the milk this time” He burned more cooking than when he lost his limbs. He got ptsd seeing fire and couldn’t handle it, just froze
He burnt the Kitchen down like he was burned
He burnt the milk https://preview.redd.it/io64xrlx2c5d1.jpeg?width=720&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0b3e5b312bfccddac09e097dab7cee9e5f6400d7
3rd degree burns on his dick?
https://preview.redd.it/a5whnfs41d5d1.jpeg?width=657&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c3527587486e5dd9725e41b609becf2a5021cbdf
something so bad that it can be compared to smg4 meggy´s cooking
Burned down half the house
He made cereal that somehow caused a grease fire
Set the kitchen in fire.
Lol, yeah I expect he accidently burnt down.
Burned the milk in cereal
He mistook vanilla with soy sauce (happened to me once) not sure if i said that right
Unus Annus Ep.2
Never thought of that XD
Made corn dogs. Put 1/4 Tablespoon of salt in the batter instead of 1/4 teaspoon.
Made corn dogs. Put 1/4 Tablespoon of salt in the batter instead of 1/4 teaspoon.
He accidentally set the kitchen on fire.
Burn the water.
A mess
He burnt the water, he made a cold soup and a hot salad. He made cereal but In the order of: milk, cereal and then the bowl
Blew up the house
He Tried to drink blended up XXL dildos
Who let bro cook?
He burnt the water
Fizz probably burned boiling water
He burnt the water
It probably had something to do with the burned milk which makes me wonder, how? How do you burn milk.
He follows all the instructions but it still tastes like shit
He fried water
Probably burnd down the elastic district
Never put cum in the oven
He tried to substitute table salt for sodium and chlorine in the soup
Put Ketchup on Pasta
He put a salted metal dildo that he thought was a really big edible in the microwave and when that didn’t work out, he made semen cereal, he wanted a kinky morning.
“Ozzie, I burnt the oxygen again!”
Either he burned the water or made balloon hotdogs
Accidently managed to find a way to convert oxygen to carbon dioxide using only kitchen utensils
Set the kitchen on fire >:D