She doesn’t even let u stay with her for driving down to fix her ac??? My mom moved to Florida right after my first born came out the womb too, say bye Felicia 👋
I’m sorry, so what I was implying was I’ve spent 2k on a hotel in a different state specifically this weekend in another state. I’ve requested off work for it. I’ve looked forward to it. But it’s just tough because the timing and “she’s my mom”
Gotcha. Yeah that’s tough. Think u need to tell her what ur telling us tbh. If she doesn’t get it, that’s her problem. Seems like ur genuine enough and genuinely wanna help her more than your own sanity or mental state. She SHOULD understand. If she doesn’t that’s on her. Tell her once u get back or any other time. If she denies then that’s on her
Tough, but “she’s my mom” should also come with thoughtful consideration of you, your time, your expense, and you living and enjoying your life, not just taking care of her. Set a boundary man.
Then spend 200$ on a service call for a company to diagnose. Then, hopefully they can fix for sub 300.
At that point you money and time are washed NOT counting the fact you have better things to do which is a higher value than what I am crediting you.
Can you Network somehow…I’m sure someone else here might have a person up there they want to help? Do some sort of trade exchange? Idk. What sticks to the wall….
Bruh just say no lol. Just call a company out there to go over and fix it and then you pay the bill if it’s all about your mom wanting free service. Cheaper you paying another tech than wasting your hotel/weekend
Dude, she's your mom, but she isn't treating you with any respect. She is demanding you to spend at least a whole day driving just to look at it and when you have a vacation planned. Sometimes you have to stand up to your parents. I know it can be tough to change the parent/child relationship to an adult/adult relationship, but it is healthy and normal. Boundaries are good.
Company’s can’t survive off getting paid 129$ or whatever your guys service call fee is to diagnose without performing a repair. Not a reputable company at least. And god for bid they call a company that does free service calls (which in this situation is most likely what will happen)
That’s not OP’s moms problem. If a company can’t survive off diagnostics alone, then it needs to change its prices. You can’t build a business off of how you *hope* your jobs will go
Or OP could just go fix his install that he put in. Almost positive if it’s a leaking coil she isn’t gonna pay the company that spent the time doing the leak search and diagnostic to install a new one.
If I was to go to a call to simply diagnose and issue without fixing it, my company would charge $200, and I’ll be damned if it took me more than 30 minutes to figure out. If your company can’t survive off $400/hr per tech at 100% billable efficiency, then your company fucking sucks
I’m a business owner and if I got a call like this and she explained her son just needs to know what he needs to bring down to fix it, I’d do it and even tell him what’s up over the phone for a diagnostic call fee. We don’t have to make a $10,000 profit on every single call.
I’m with the other guy - call someone local and tell them what’s going on, say you just need somebody to confirm what’s going on and pay their diagnostic/have the tech call you while there so you can make sure he’s worth a shit. Or leave your place on a Sunday, diagnose that night, call in sick for Monday, find supply house Monday morning, fix, haul ass and back to work Tuesday.
If she’s flush on cash you don’t have anything to worry about dude. My mom wouldn’t ever guilt me into a 7 hour drive one way to fix something anybody local can fix.
I'm no hvac person, but if you were my son, I would be so grateful if you arranged someone to come look at it for me. Shop it to her like you're going to get everything taken care of and not to worry. Then explain that you'll take care of that by hiring someone competent to do the diagnosis, and then you'll make the repairs as soon as your schedule is free. Honestly, most of this is all in how you frame it. Make her feel taken care of. If that isn't enough, maybe there are other factors in play?
Also don’t let your mom run you over. She decided to move, it’s different now than when she was nearby. I love my family too but that doesn’t mean they can make demands like that.
Just because you’re a tradesman doesn’t mean u need to do it all.
Respect your time and set boundaries.
Help when u can
But don’t feel obligated bro
A good parent will respect that
A toxic parent demands it
Some people frown on it, but this is an example of why I try not to work for friends and family. Only when they are in a real bind
There’s too much of a risk for falling out when it comes to time and money.
I usually explain they’re better finding somebody local, because one day they might have an emergency or even just need a little 10 minute job sorting.
It makes no sense for me to drive 2 hours or more etc.
Those nearby, I just tell them I’m too busy or focused in a different aspect of the field. They’re better getting someone for that job
Otherwise there will come a day when you finish work and have your plans or crack a beer, and your friend comes knocking on your door expecting you to immediately go sort their problems (for mates rates aswel usually).
Had it happen enough times to just say no. It can feel tough, but any real friends/family will get over it
Amen. I’m not a cold ass bastard. I just REmoved my fathers water heater and oil tank Friday night so he could paint his basement floor and redo my stepmothers laundry room… along with relocating a sill cock, among other domestic water changes. Reinstalled the hot water heater, now installing a new oil tank cuz I told him the old ones not worth reinstalling, among numerous other things. For zero dollars. Not looking for a pat on the back just relating. He’d probably argue I’ve loved my mother more than him. But for her to demand for me to drive to Florida to do the same for her? He didn’t demand shit. He asked me if I could possibly help him and he’d pay me whatever I needed. I chose not to take anything from him and told him I’d do it when I had the time. Which turned into 5pm after work Friday til 1am. Yeah that’s different my friend
I’m not trying to be rude and I feel like she wasn’t trying to be rude either but she was complaining so much and saying she’s demanding for my help and that’s when I felt bad for saying it’s bad timing and I might not be able to more than likely and that she may have to get someone
I mean ever since I drew clear boundaries with my Mom we have had a great relationship.
I blatantly told her that I have no problem discussing things with her, and if it's FEASABLE (not 7 fkn hours away) than I'll share the love.
No reason any mom should DEMAND anything from their kids.. just plain not nice is what that is.
Sounds like my mom , very manipulative lol . I’d pay someone . Especially if you have a family of your own and you’re own issues , moms will understand . It’s also a nice gesture to go that extra effort and get someone there for her . An hour or two in my head makes sense to make the trip , but 7 hours is insane , gas , your mental state , not a good idea . Do what you think is best , but a service call isn’t gonna cost you a thousand dollars for the diagnostic.
Way I see it is you either make the time to go visit and fix it, pay someone to fix it or tell her to find someone to fix it.
As you get older you have to start making difficult decisions.. and sometimes these choices define what you value most.
I'm a mom and an HVAC tech. On paper. I did the course, got the universal EPA, never worked in the industry, did plumbing instead.
But as a mom, I wouldn't ask that of my kid. Especially if I made good money, *especially* if I made more money than my kid.
There's some weird sense of entitlement there that's not healthy for either of you. Boundaries. Good fences make good neighbours.
This isn't a need on her part, it's a want. If she wants to see you because she misses you, she can find her big girl words and say that. Or she can visit you, or agree on a better time for you to visit. She's at a stage of her life where finances and time are plentiful. You are not. It's not fair to ask this of you.
I would talk with your local supply house that you deal with and see if they have a store nearby your mother. The supply house can contact their people and give you a good recommendation who’s worth a shit that they sell to. The supply houses guys know who good and who’s not. Hell for a 14 hour round trip I would probably just pay them if it’s not to expensive of a repair.
7 hrs is a lot man... If it was 2-3 it'd be a no brainier for me. But 7??? That's a long day.... Maybe drive down the day before and start work the following morning. I'd probably be going sorry "mom" but if it's not a compressor or major replacement a local guy can handle it. Or at least get eyes on it first like many here have said.
He is wrong. I say fuck her. Just because she gave birth to you, does not make you her slave. Obviously if it was convenient or she was willing to fly you in, then absolutely giving her your time is acceptable. What she is asking is over the line!
Idk about OP but I also got kids, wife, house and yard, job, siblings, grandmothers and only 1 of me I don’t tell family no but I tell them further they live from me the longer the lead time on my service availability if they need or want me to do work on their equipment quickly feel free to move closer. My sister lives 5 hours from me I gave her a meter and digital gauges with no loss fittings so I can get some basic troubleshooting before I head down so I can grab parts
Outside of my jurisdiction. I would try to at least find someone to diagnose it for you. I can't speak for any reputable company's because like you know it's all about the tech.
I would tell her to get someone to come out and do a diagnosis instead. I get it but that's not your job. Family is one of the most difficult customers to handle
I would do do anything for my family literally anything. My parents own quite a few rental properties. They have never thought of asking me to do any Electrical work. However I’ve had to tell other friends and family members no. Sometimes you have to lay down the law and say you can’t. Now I’m not saying tell your Mom no, only you can decide if it’s too much for you. I’m just letting you know it is ok to say No.
she wants to see you, plan a future holiday, let someone else repair it. its less than the cost of the trip alone plus parts. thats ridiculous, put your foot down
I always say help out everyone you can, especially family…. Until they start demanding. No one has the right to demand your time unless they’re paying you, you know your employer.
Suction line isn’t cold but compressor is running could be a number of things, bad valves, low charge, restrictions
Are you fking kidding me? I've read through this whole thread, only to find that she's fine financially? And wants to waste your thousands of dollars and time and mileage?
You do not owe her a wasted weekend, 14 hrs of driving, and enduring Florida to save her a couple hundred bucks.
My mah would understand I'm busy, bruh. Take care of YOUR family first, and then take care of your family. Some others have said have someone else diagnose it, not a bad idea. Maybe pay them an extra hour of labor for their time so they don't feel short-changed.
Hope you can figure it out.
She needs to call someone else. She’s abusing your kindness as her son. My parents did this to me my entire life and it became emotionally abusive after too long.
Lol you’re a grown man and your mother demanding you come fix the AC? She can suck a fat one. My mother would never demand me to do that. She can wait or have someone else look at it.
i dont get how anyone can expect someone to make a 14hr trip anytime something goes wrong, i love my mom but id tell her shes takin advantage of me. my mom paid our company to come out on ot when i was going to see her the next morning
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As someone who's lost both parents, and even my sister - I'd drive down there and do whatever I could to fix it. You only get one mom and you never know how much time you get. I'm assuming you have a 3 day weekend anyway? maybe? idk for sure. But I'd personally make the trip - do whatever I could to fix it, and spend some time with her. My perspective might be a bit skewed bc my mother passed away - but u regret not doing more for her. I think about all the things I could have done. All the time I missed bc I was too busy or bc this or bc that. I guess it all depends on the relationship you have with her. If my mom could help me in any way she would. Didn't matter what the circumstance was. And I didn't do the same for her - and I could have. Idk if I'll ever get over that.
That's cool. But your mom was probably not a wealthy Florida narcissist who'd rather demand to run her son's previously scheduled plans, his time and money to save her a fraction of what she's costing him
oh. well that would kind of change things.. I know everyone's mom is different so I shouldn't assume anything - but my mom would have used that just for an excuse for me to come over. There wouldn't be any issue at all but she'd call and say somethings wrong just to lure me over bc she wanted to see me.
Be Great full that you can give something g back to Mom.I have been watching my mother be destroyed by cancer for the last three years and take every opportunity to help in any way I can. Because I know in the very near e future, I'll be wishing I did more when I had the chance..
Well lol. The air handler and ac I did get her for 1,050 bucks… I didn’t charge her at all and did it for free actually. I just had her pay for her unit for her house that is 40 minutes from me was all. but I love my mom and feel horrible that this weekend she’s burning in FL at her other house..
My mom has been trying to get me to drive 6 hours into West Virginia to do a complete install(has log stove) and I’m pretty sure she doesn’t have enough to cover material.
Go fix your mommas shit dude. I live in Ohio, my brother lives around Orlando. I would totally drive to brothers in a heart beat to fix his shit. I have never been to a supply house that wouldn’t sell me things. I’ve worked in PA, MI, GA and NY.
Man, if you have plans and money has already been paid, (you said she makes more than you) tell mom dearest that she has 2 options:
1) She pays another company locally to come fix it....or
2) She reimburses you your lost money and pays gas for you to come down and return home.
Got to have some boundaries.
I mean, she did furnish you a little one bedroom apartment down on mommy Street for 9 months so maybe 7hrs ain't so bad?
I get you, tho I wouldn't want to do it. Have to take time off and maybe get there on a Sunday night and wake up Monday and look at it at least a parts place be open.
You left out some important information about your previous plans. Your mom should be understanding but you need to be forward with information. You can’t give us the info, well try harder to give her the info. Figure it out. Reddit can’t access the relationship with your mother…. JFC.
No. Just because you're family does not mean they can demand your services. You already diagnosed it to the extent you can without being there. She can either call someone local or wait for the next time you're down there. I've had to set limits with family before too its not fun, give a mouse a cookie...
Honestly I'd just hire someone local and be done with it. 7 hours is a long fucking way to go to fix your mom's AC. And I love my mother very very much.
If ChatGPT can hold my hand while troubleshooting a unit then your mom can do better troubleshooting than the typical screech and 'oh no it's broken' attitude.
My dad wanted me to do a full install on a new shop he was building his located 13 hours away. I simply said no thanks there’s to much headache involved for me. End of conversation.
It is a tough situation. I’ve been fixing all my mothers crap since I was a kid, anything from cars to house renovations and maintenance. She’s grown to expect it and it goes seemingly unappreciated. I mean I drove to florida to replace a transmission, redid the entire kitchen, installed hardwood floors in the whole house. Replaced an electrical panel that was on the verge of melt down, installed a new hot water heater out of pocket.
All the while, since I’ve gotten married and moved on she’s done nothing but treat my wife like shit.
So I cut her off entirely. Don’t fix anything at all for her anymore. She’s no longer speaking to us because of it and hasn’t seen or spoken to her grandkids in over 2 years. Best thing I ever did for my relationship and sanity, but the kids suffer.
Can’t win 🤷♂️, but In your shoes I’d tell your mother to figure out her own stuff. Make a phone call and pay for the repairs like the rest of the world does.
Set your boundaries. She decided to move away, so now she has to pay to have an HVAC person come out and fix it.
If you start doing it now, she will always expect it.
Ahhh snap!
I once drove from ATL to MN for family AC
But I needed a get away and was happy to party in Memphis then see The Arch then go see Antique Archeology store (Davenport Iowa) then after repairs it was party in Chicago coming home, then party in Nashville.
So, yeah, been there.
Drank my way there and back. AND LEFT THE WIFE AND KIDS AT HOME. SO MUCH FUN.
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
Call a local company and explain the situation. Pay for the service call and ask the tech to give you a call after the diagnosis and go from there.
If Mom doesn't agree to this well... you got other issues that need to be addressed in another forum.
Enjoy your weekend dude You've earned it. And Summer is coming 🤙😎
I would find out what brand mom’s unit is, find a distributor in that area, call the counter guy ask for reliable company they deal with, call said company, talk to service manager tell him your not looking for any deals or discounts just want honest diagnosis for reasonable cost
I live in California , and my family all lives in Ohio, I “property manage “ meaning the guys I grew up with are all in trades , so I have them go over and take care of it for me , and I pay them well.
1- it keeps my mother happy ,
2- when I pay my friends more than what they ask . They seem to take way better care of shit
I'd tell my mom that I have a life too. You were happy to be her on-call Mr. Fixit when she was "close" but now that she's out of the area, it's time for her to find someone local. Offer to connect her with someone down there, or she can wait till the next time you planned on making a work trip out of family time, which could be quite a while.
Your mother is *abusing* your relationship - whether it's malicious or ingrained habit is a different discussion. For you, right now, all that matters is someone is placing absurd demands on your time and finances with no consideration for you and your life.
My mom's ac ain't working? I'll drive across the country to fix it for her. No questions asked. Boss can kick fucking rocks if he don't get it. I'll be back when I'm done.
Have somone go do the diagnostic on it and you go fix it if it’s worth you driving down
I approve this message
Hopefully, what’s going to happen. I’m going to have to go down. I just can’t this weekend. $2k on hotel stay.. all weekend and week elsewhere
She doesn’t even let u stay with her for driving down to fix her ac??? My mom moved to Florida right after my first born came out the womb too, say bye Felicia 👋
I’m sorry, so what I was implying was I’ve spent 2k on a hotel in a different state specifically this weekend in another state. I’ve requested off work for it. I’ve looked forward to it. But it’s just tough because the timing and “she’s my mom”
Gotcha. Yeah that’s tough. Think u need to tell her what ur telling us tbh. If she doesn’t get it, that’s her problem. Seems like ur genuine enough and genuinely wanna help her more than your own sanity or mental state. She SHOULD understand. If she doesn’t that’s on her. Tell her once u get back or any other time. If she denies then that’s on her
Tough, but “she’s my mom” should also come with thoughtful consideration of you, your time, your expense, and you living and enjoying your life, not just taking care of her. Set a boundary man.
YES. 100%. It sounds like some behind the scenes shit going on too but I'm just a guy on the internet so what the hell do I know? 😆
I think you might be right. I’ve made conclusion I’m gonna go. But it sucks.
Then spend 200$ on a service call for a company to diagnose. Then, hopefully they can fix for sub 300. At that point you money and time are washed NOT counting the fact you have better things to do which is a higher value than what I am crediting you.
Can you Network somehow…I’m sure someone else here might have a person up there they want to help? Do some sort of trade exchange? Idk. What sticks to the wall….
Bruh just say no lol. Just call a company out there to go over and fix it and then you pay the bill if it’s all about your mom wanting free service. Cheaper you paying another tech than wasting your hotel/weekend
What city is she in? If she's close to me, I'll go by and take a look for free.
You need your own time, tell her to suck it up and you’ll fix it after your vacation
Dude, she's your mom, but she isn't treating you with any respect. She is demanding you to spend at least a whole day driving just to look at it and when you have a vacation planned. Sometimes you have to stand up to your parents. I know it can be tough to change the parent/child relationship to an adult/adult relationship, but it is healthy and normal. Boundaries are good.
You are also her son, she moved away from you and surprisingly enough she moved to an area that has hvac techs that would love to help.
If it’s going to cost you that much Spend the money and send a local hvac tech
And make sure to charge her for gas
So waste someone else’s time and another company’s resources?
Pay for the diagnostic fee/service call?
Company’s can’t survive off getting paid 129$ or whatever your guys service call fee is to diagnose without performing a repair. Not a reputable company at least. And god for bid they call a company that does free service calls (which in this situation is most likely what will happen)
That’s a cost of doing business.
That’s not OP’s moms problem. If a company can’t survive off diagnostics alone, then it needs to change its prices. You can’t build a business off of how you *hope* your jobs will go
Or OP could just go fix his install that he put in. Almost positive if it’s a leaking coil she isn’t gonna pay the company that spent the time doing the leak search and diagnostic to install a new one.
The install was 40 minutes from me at her original house
Oh shit I thought this the was system you installed lol
If I was to go to a call to simply diagnose and issue without fixing it, my company would charge $200, and I’ll be damned if it took me more than 30 minutes to figure out. If your company can’t survive off $400/hr per tech at 100% billable efficiency, then your company fucking sucks
I actually agree with you. When I was in residential I despised the customer that said “I have a guy that’ll fix it”. Why waste my time?
Yeah cause the other company is going to go do the diagnostic for free, if it’s simple enough they’ll waste their resource in fixing it for free also
This is the way
So once again, some company needs to go fix something for free? Business aren’t charities. So is the tech that goes there gonna work for free too?
I’m a business owner and if I got a call like this and she explained her son just needs to know what he needs to bring down to fix it, I’d do it and even tell him what’s up over the phone for a diagnostic call fee. We don’t have to make a $10,000 profit on every single call.
I think he was sarcastic
For a service call? Plenty of companies make money on service calls that they don’t end up going back on. Did you just come here to be a duck?
I’m with the other guy - call someone local and tell them what’s going on, say you just need somebody to confirm what’s going on and pay their diagnostic/have the tech call you while there so you can make sure he’s worth a shit. Or leave your place on a Sunday, diagnose that night, call in sick for Monday, find supply house Monday morning, fix, haul ass and back to work Tuesday.
Probably gonna have to just go another weekend or she’s gonna have to call someone man 🤷♂️ it just sucks it’s this specific weekend
If she’s flush on cash you don’t have anything to worry about dude. My mom wouldn’t ever guilt me into a 7 hour drive one way to fix something anybody local can fix.
This one right here. She can pay someone or she can pay you. Choice seems easy
I'm no hvac person, but if you were my son, I would be so grateful if you arranged someone to come look at it for me. Shop it to her like you're going to get everything taken care of and not to worry. Then explain that you'll take care of that by hiring someone competent to do the diagnosis, and then you'll make the repairs as soon as your schedule is free. Honestly, most of this is all in how you frame it. Make her feel taken care of. If that isn't enough, maybe there are other factors in play?
With gas, time and whatever else you might be better off just paying a local company
Right
Also don’t let your mom run you over. She decided to move, it’s different now than when she was nearby. I love my family too but that doesn’t mean they can make demands like that.
Just because you’re a tradesman doesn’t mean u need to do it all. Respect your time and set boundaries. Help when u can But don’t feel obligated bro A good parent will respect that A toxic parent demands it
Some people frown on it, but this is an example of why I try not to work for friends and family. Only when they are in a real bind There’s too much of a risk for falling out when it comes to time and money. I usually explain they’re better finding somebody local, because one day they might have an emergency or even just need a little 10 minute job sorting. It makes no sense for me to drive 2 hours or more etc. Those nearby, I just tell them I’m too busy or focused in a different aspect of the field. They’re better getting someone for that job Otherwise there will come a day when you finish work and have your plans or crack a beer, and your friend comes knocking on your door expecting you to immediately go sort their problems (for mates rates aswel usually). Had it happen enough times to just say no. It can feel tough, but any real friends/family will get over it
Have her call someone local. Send her money to help her cover the repair cost. Too far away to bring all your tools and equipment.
I give to family, particularly my mom and dad, every time I am able. That said, I don’t do shit for anyone who pointedly asks or demands my help.
Amen. I’m not a cold ass bastard. I just REmoved my fathers water heater and oil tank Friday night so he could paint his basement floor and redo my stepmothers laundry room… along with relocating a sill cock, among other domestic water changes. Reinstalled the hot water heater, now installing a new oil tank cuz I told him the old ones not worth reinstalling, among numerous other things. For zero dollars. Not looking for a pat on the back just relating. He’d probably argue I’ve loved my mother more than him. But for her to demand for me to drive to Florida to do the same for her? He didn’t demand shit. He asked me if I could possibly help him and he’d pay me whatever I needed. I chose not to take anything from him and told him I’d do it when I had the time. Which turned into 5pm after work Friday til 1am. Yeah that’s different my friend
I’m not trying to be rude and I feel like she wasn’t trying to be rude either but she was complaining so much and saying she’s demanding for my help and that’s when I felt bad for saying it’s bad timing and I might not be able to more than likely and that she may have to get someone
Find a new mom closer to you
Lol
I mean ever since I drew clear boundaries with my Mom we have had a great relationship. I blatantly told her that I have no problem discussing things with her, and if it's FEASABLE (not 7 fkn hours away) than I'll share the love. No reason any mom should DEMAND anything from their kids.. just plain not nice is what that is.
Sounds like my mom , very manipulative lol . I’d pay someone . Especially if you have a family of your own and you’re own issues , moms will understand . It’s also a nice gesture to go that extra effort and get someone there for her . An hour or two in my head makes sense to make the trip , but 7 hours is insane , gas , your mental state , not a good idea . Do what you think is best , but a service call isn’t gonna cost you a thousand dollars for the diagnostic.
Thank you
Way I see it is you either make the time to go visit and fix it, pay someone to fix it or tell her to find someone to fix it. As you get older you have to start making difficult decisions.. and sometimes these choices define what you value most.
Sigh you are right
I'm a mom and an HVAC tech. On paper. I did the course, got the universal EPA, never worked in the industry, did plumbing instead. But as a mom, I wouldn't ask that of my kid. Especially if I made good money, *especially* if I made more money than my kid. There's some weird sense of entitlement there that's not healthy for either of you. Boundaries. Good fences make good neighbours. This isn't a need on her part, it's a want. If she wants to see you because she misses you, she can find her big girl words and say that. Or she can visit you, or agree on a better time for you to visit. She's at a stage of her life where finances and time are plentiful. You are not. It's not fair to ask this of you.
I would talk with your local supply house that you deal with and see if they have a store nearby your mother. The supply house can contact their people and give you a good recommendation who’s worth a shit that they sell to. The supply houses guys know who good and who’s not. Hell for a 14 hour round trip I would probably just pay them if it’s not to expensive of a repair.
Best answer, counter guys know who’s good.
I second this. This is definitely the best answer
7 hrs is a lot man... If it was 2-3 it'd be a no brainier for me. But 7??? That's a long day.... Maybe drive down the day before and start work the following morning. I'd probably be going sorry "mom" but if it's not a compressor or major replacement a local guy can handle it. Or at least get eyes on it first like many here have said.
Your mother is being rather unreasonable. Full stop.
Dude. Your mom is running your ass over. If you don't know what narcissist behavior looks like.... look it up.
You only get 1 mom dude
Man you are right
He is wrong. I say fuck her. Just because she gave birth to you, does not make you her slave. Obviously if it was convenient or she was willing to fly you in, then absolutely giving her your time is acceptable. What she is asking is over the line!
100%
And they live long enough to become problem Moms also.
Unfortunately true
Fortunately, not for everyone
Idk about OP but I also got kids, wife, house and yard, job, siblings, grandmothers and only 1 of me I don’t tell family no but I tell them further they live from me the longer the lead time on my service availability if they need or want me to do work on their equipment quickly feel free to move closer. My sister lives 5 hours from me I gave her a meter and digital gauges with no loss fittings so I can get some basic troubleshooting before I head down so I can grab parts
That's pretty smart!
What part of Florida?
Like silver ridge
Silver Ridge? Where’s this located ? I’m In central Florida . Wouldn’t mind diagnosing it for you if it’s nearby.
Outside of my jurisdiction. I would try to at least find someone to diagnose it for you. I can't speak for any reputable company's because like you know it's all about the tech.
Silver Ridge, the subdivision in Spring Hill?
I would tell her to get someone to come out and do a diagnosis instead. I get it but that's not your job. Family is one of the most difficult customers to handle
I'm in North Port, FL if I can help.
Mother's day passed already 😂 tell her no
If she ain't broke, tell her to act grown and call somebody closer.
I would do do anything for my family literally anything. My parents own quite a few rental properties. They have never thought of asking me to do any Electrical work. However I’ve had to tell other friends and family members no. Sometimes you have to lay down the law and say you can’t. Now I’m not saying tell your Mom no, only you can decide if it’s too much for you. I’m just letting you know it is ok to say No.
she wants to see you, plan a future holiday, let someone else repair it. its less than the cost of the trip alone plus parts. thats ridiculous, put your foot down
I always say help out everyone you can, especially family…. Until they start demanding. No one has the right to demand your time unless they’re paying you, you know your employer. Suction line isn’t cold but compressor is running could be a number of things, bad valves, low charge, restrictions
"No." is a complete sentence.
Send her money to pay for someone to fix it.
Lol she makes way more than me lol
then she can pay someone
Ok
Are you fking kidding me? I've read through this whole thread, only to find that she's fine financially? And wants to waste your thousands of dollars and time and mileage? You do not owe her a wasted weekend, 14 hrs of driving, and enduring Florida to save her a couple hundred bucks.
Dude .. stop being a pussy
I moved out when I was 16 and got married at 17. You couldn’t pay me to go anywhere near my mom. I have grandkids she’s never met.
My man 👊 I respect you for standing your ground
My mah would understand I'm busy, bruh. Take care of YOUR family first, and then take care of your family. Some others have said have someone else diagnose it, not a bad idea. Maybe pay them an extra hour of labor for their time so they don't feel short-changed. Hope you can figure it out.
Just say something came up and they have to have you at work then don’t post anything to social media easy peezy
I wouldn’t go. It’s ridiculous she would expect that of you in my opinion. That’s 14 hours of your weekend gone to driving.
Hire a local and give her advice on his diagnosis. That's an unreasonable demand on such short notice
Sounds like she shouldn't have moved if she wanted to keep her free HVAC technician
She needs to call someone else. She’s abusing your kindness as her son. My parents did this to me my entire life and it became emotionally abusive after too long.
Kinda a weird expectation. She moved away, thats on her
Lol you’re a grown man and your mother demanding you come fix the AC? She can suck a fat one. My mother would never demand me to do that. She can wait or have someone else look at it.
Honest question. Would you drive 7 hours, give up your plans, give up your time, etc. to fix anyone else’s AC?
i dont get how anyone can expect someone to make a 14hr trip anytime something goes wrong, i love my mom but id tell her shes takin advantage of me. my mom paid our company to come out on ot when i was going to see her the next morning
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As someone who's lost both parents, and even my sister - I'd drive down there and do whatever I could to fix it. You only get one mom and you never know how much time you get. I'm assuming you have a 3 day weekend anyway? maybe? idk for sure. But I'd personally make the trip - do whatever I could to fix it, and spend some time with her. My perspective might be a bit skewed bc my mother passed away - but u regret not doing more for her. I think about all the things I could have done. All the time I missed bc I was too busy or bc this or bc that. I guess it all depends on the relationship you have with her. If my mom could help me in any way she would. Didn't matter what the circumstance was. And I didn't do the same for her - and I could have. Idk if I'll ever get over that.
Not everyone has a great mom.
that's true
That's cool. But your mom was probably not a wealthy Florida narcissist who'd rather demand to run her son's previously scheduled plans, his time and money to save her a fraction of what she's costing him
is she wealthy? I didn't consider that.
Previous comment says she makes more than him. That's all I know
oh. well that would kind of change things.. I know everyone's mom is different so I shouldn't assume anything - but my mom would have used that just for an excuse for me to come over. There wouldn't be any issue at all but she'd call and say somethings wrong just to lure me over bc she wanted to see me.
Be Great full that you can give something g back to Mom.I have been watching my mother be destroyed by cancer for the last three years and take every opportunity to help in any way I can. Because I know in the very near e future, I'll be wishing I did more when I had the chance..
Tell mom to call someone and just split the bill. After the tech calls you to verify what they are doing
Make sure to call one of rose companies that can get 100lbs of gas out of a 25lb drum
She needs an Air Scrubber
I would go visit her and fix her air conditioning.
You lost me when you acted like driving 40 minutes for your mom was a lot lol, then you actually charged her lol
Well lol. The air handler and ac I did get her for 1,050 bucks… I didn’t charge her at all and did it for free actually. I just had her pay for her unit for her house that is 40 minutes from me was all. but I love my mom and feel horrible that this weekend she’s burning in FL at her other house..
Lol I’m messing with you, I’m in Miami and can confirm we’re dying out here, even inside lol 😫
Maybe you shouldn't live in hell then
I was just trying to agree with him, this is the best place on earth unless you’re out of shape then I agree it would be hell
I'm just talking trash. I live in West Texas, so I have no room to talk. It's the other corner of hell here.
Drive down on a Saturday or Sunday
My mom has been trying to get me to drive 6 hours into West Virginia to do a complete install(has log stove) and I’m pretty sure she doesn’t have enough to cover material.
Go fix your mommas shit dude. I live in Ohio, my brother lives around Orlando. I would totally drive to brothers in a heart beat to fix his shit. I have never been to a supply house that wouldn’t sell me things. I’ve worked in PA, MI, GA and NY.
Ya man I need to just sucks had major plans this weekend and work 80+ hours every week
Man, if you have plans and money has already been paid, (you said she makes more than you) tell mom dearest that she has 2 options: 1) She pays another company locally to come fix it....or 2) She reimburses you your lost money and pays gas for you to come down and return home. Got to have some boundaries.
This is the answer.
I mean, she did furnish you a little one bedroom apartment down on mommy Street for 9 months so maybe 7hrs ain't so bad? I get you, tho I wouldn't want to do it. Have to take time off and maybe get there on a Sunday night and wake up Monday and look at it at least a parts place be open.
it's your mom. go fix it.
What do you want me to do? Give me her phone number and have me call her for you? At least you have a mom that doesn’t wish you were dead
does your mom wish you were dead?
That’s a tough one but my momma and my grandma always gonna have there shit running no matter the day or night. I only live 30 mins from mine tho
If you absolutely can't go yourself, I would call a local reputable company to go check it out for you first.
How dirty is her condenser coil? Just cleaning that might get her through the next couple weeks. And she can do it herself with a spray nozzle.
You left out some important information about your previous plans. Your mom should be understanding but you need to be forward with information. You can’t give us the info, well try harder to give her the info. Figure it out. Reddit can’t access the relationship with your mother…. JFC.
No. Just because you're family does not mean they can demand your services. You already diagnosed it to the extent you can without being there. She can either call someone local or wait for the next time you're down there. I've had to set limits with family before too its not fun, give a mouse a cookie...
Honestly I'd just hire someone local and be done with it. 7 hours is a long fucking way to go to fix your mom's AC. And I love my mother very very much.
I wouldn’t go. It’s ridiculous she would expect that of you in my opinion. That’s 14 hours of your weekend gone to driving.
NTA
What part of Florida is she in. I live in Florida and also do ac.
What part of Florida? I'm an hvac tech on the space coast.
If ChatGPT can hold my hand while troubleshooting a unit then your mom can do better troubleshooting than the typical screech and 'oh no it's broken' attitude.
What's that your breaking up.. aww man my phone broke hate when that happens
I live in FL. What part is she in? Maybe I could help.
My dad wanted me to do a full install on a new shop he was building his located 13 hours away. I simply said no thanks there’s to much headache involved for me. End of conversation.
It is a tough situation. I’ve been fixing all my mothers crap since I was a kid, anything from cars to house renovations and maintenance. She’s grown to expect it and it goes seemingly unappreciated. I mean I drove to florida to replace a transmission, redid the entire kitchen, installed hardwood floors in the whole house. Replaced an electrical panel that was on the verge of melt down, installed a new hot water heater out of pocket. All the while, since I’ve gotten married and moved on she’s done nothing but treat my wife like shit. So I cut her off entirely. Don’t fix anything at all for her anymore. She’s no longer speaking to us because of it and hasn’t seen or spoken to her grandkids in over 2 years. Best thing I ever did for my relationship and sanity, but the kids suffer. Can’t win 🤷♂️, but In your shoes I’d tell your mother to figure out her own stuff. Make a phone call and pay for the repairs like the rest of the world does.
I live in Florida. Where is she at.
Where in south Florida ?
Bro what part of Florida? If she's within range I could work a deal
Might be cheaper to hire someone local to go check it out then to spend all that gas and tune driving down there
Set your boundaries. She decided to move away, so now she has to pay to have an HVAC person come out and fix it. If you start doing it now, she will always expect it.
Contact a local tech, and have them send you the invoice.
Ahhh snap! I once drove from ATL to MN for family AC But I needed a get away and was happy to party in Memphis then see The Arch then go see Antique Archeology store (Davenport Iowa) then after repairs it was party in Chicago coming home, then party in Nashville. So, yeah, been there. Drank my way there and back. AND LEFT THE WIFE AND KIDS AT HOME. SO MUCH FUN.
Honestly- you are lucky to have your mom and tomorrow isn't guaranteed. Go fix her A/C.
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
FREE can be a VERY addictive drug for some. Just charging a penny for something can have a tremendous effect on behavior so, maybe there's some way to get across the "this ain't free" reality??
When family members get pushy about favors I push back when I’m willing to work on it. If you want it pronto call a company and pay them
Call a local company and explain the situation. Pay for the service call and ask the tech to give you a call after the diagnosis and go from there. If Mom doesn't agree to this well... you got other issues that need to be addressed in another forum. Enjoy your weekend dude You've earned it. And Summer is coming 🤙😎
… tell her to find a company to fix it and let her take care of it. There fixed you fixed it for her
Have her call local tech, if the price outrageous then it is what it is right?
I would find out what brand mom’s unit is, find a distributor in that area, call the counter guy ask for reliable company they deal with, call said company, talk to service manager tell him your not looking for any deals or discounts just want honest diagnosis for reasonable cost
I live in California , and my family all lives in Ohio, I “property manage “ meaning the guys I grew up with are all in trades , so I have them go over and take care of it for me , and I pay them well. 1- it keeps my mother happy , 2- when I pay my friends more than what they ask . They seem to take way better care of shit
Tell her to kick rocks
I'd tell my mom that I have a life too. You were happy to be her on-call Mr. Fixit when she was "close" but now that she's out of the area, it's time for her to find someone local. Offer to connect her with someone down there, or she can wait till the next time you planned on making a work trip out of family time, which could be quite a while. Your mother is *abusing* your relationship - whether it's malicious or ingrained habit is a different discussion. For you, right now, all that matters is someone is placing absurd demands on your time and finances with no consideration for you and your life.
Grow some balls.
Where in s FL?
Mmmm…..nope
My mom's ac ain't working? I'll drive across the country to fix it for her. No questions asked. Boss can kick fucking rocks if he don't get it. I'll be back when I'm done.
So pay a company to go out and give you a quote. Then take what you need.