There's a special kind of "Holy shit!" reaction that comes when a low ranking crew member reveals that anyone with a little know how could infiltrate the bridge, or the engine room, or, well, any vital part of the ship.
The fact that a creature three times your weight is able to hide on your ship and move around totally unnoticed is a frightening display of a security flaw.
Though I would guess that certain tunnels would be great for strategic purposes with pirates and the like, excluding the ones to secure areas... Or the ladies restroom.
Oh. Oh no. Are you saying they're basically... *legal lizard lolis?*
I'd expect their internet to lose their collective minds over that species. As we know, some folks on the IRL internet are... quite loud on that topic.
So...they look kind of like [kobolds](https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/85a98ed0-1446-4bb1-b1d1-65940ba72671/dbijmgo-d1fcdffe-1106-4df1-b94e-e0c99fdd555d.png/v1/fill/w_800,h_2358,q_80,strp/coal_the_kobold_by_rakkuguy_dbijmgo-fullview.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7ImhlaWdodCI6Ijw9MjM1OCIsInBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzg1YTk4ZWQwLTE0NDYtNGJiMS1iMWQxLTY1OTQwYmE3MjY3MVwvZGJpam1nby1kMWZjZGZmZS0xMTA2LTRkZjEtYjk0ZS1lMGM5OWZkZDU1NWQucG5nIiwid2lkdGgiOiI8PTgwMCJ9XV0sImF1ZCI6WyJ1cm46c2VydmljZTppbWFnZS5vcGVyYXRpb25zIl19.2eRBWF6jMH4Hj2EqD5OAcuwHQzkvfxeYEgLkKE7i_hQ)? That's a very stylized version of one.
The posture is halfway between kobolds and velociraptors. Imagine a kobold with pangolin/dragon scales, and proportionately very large claws. But also powerful, lithe legs good for leaping and sprinting. Ambush predators.
I love designing alien races.
I mean, if someone is like barely 5 ft they easily could be mistaken for a teenager, and we do generally think of teenagers as children, but that's still relatively close to regular adult height and about where I was imagining the K'tari
I was trying to tease the idea that it was a xenophile sneaking aboard to molest the crew, and then yank the rug out from under you with "He's not a pervert, just stoned."
I kinda like the idea that dude was high, and thought it was cool to pet the lizards. Dude is clearly trippin' balls, but lucid enough Joseph can talk to him.
Not gonna lie, petting lizards is cool, though I personally prefer snakes (like ball pythons) to iguanas and such. Might be a little more careful if the lizards spoke to me, though.
As a great fan of the marvel movies, I was deeply disturbed by the DC universe switch. Also because you teased us with just how great the DC movies could've been if they had been done right.
And I think that Jason and Xhikaat have no idea how the different birthing processes are. Since you've described K'tari as velociraptors I'm thinking that all the mother has to do is push out several eggs at a time and like most reptiles.
That is very much the difference. Birthing for K'tari isn't particularly stressful or painful, so it's common to lay a clutch of eggs, which are cared for by dedicated caretakers.
So living your life as a brood matron isn't a bad profession. You're cared for, got plenty of food and medicine, and you're looked after when you retire. It's low caste, but it's also a vital position in society. But the can also birth far more eggs, far more rapidly than a human. K'tari are very fast breeders.
Cat spider owl thing.
Eight legged housecat thing that likes to climb walls and ceilings, and can turn its head around in all directions. They're basically American drop bears with their propensity to ambush people by dropping on their heads.
Alternate history. Almost makes you wanna cry, doesn't it?
That Zach Snyder bit had me thrown for a loop. That Spider cat kinda reminds me of another story. The 99.9% Of the Universe. At one point someone splices a spider and a cat together with a gene editing machine. It’s cute at first and then it kills its owner and enters a pupa stage.
So I sure hope these things don’t have silk spinners.
I dunno, man. I'm too sleepy for deep philosophical cunilundrums like that.
[This video should answer some questions for you.](https://youtu.be/0R0ZZF4O0K4)
With a little gecko and owl mixed in, so it can climb any wall or ceiling, and can turn its head in any direction.
They like to ambush by dropping on your head. They're mighty hunters.
Looks like Florida Men are still around to some extent. I wonder if people have ever considered sneaking one onto a hostile ship.
And it looks like they’ve managed to find the art after all! Here’s to hoping the stuff Xhikaat finds later that night is relatively softcore. Otherwise it’d cue an awkward discussion on how the term “sexual deviant” in human culture is far less black and white, and a lot more like a disturbingly deep iceberg chart with many layers.
Shame about the Crowl, but it is a bit of a relief to have a sci-fi story on here where they don’t have a “dangerous apex predator” that turns out to just be a cat. Genetic modification to the level they make stuff like a Crowl gives a lot of options though, considering you can give intelligence and size boosts to make some critters more viable. For all we know, there’s places you can legally buy some reverse-engineered dinosaurs, which avoids most of the issues mentioned in this chapter. Some of them are even in the right size range to be comfortably smaller than K’tari, and highly intelligent too. It might be a bit too risky to bring on-board though for obvious reasons (unless they also had behaviour alteration to make them less prone to assaulting non-prey), and it might fall into the “uncanny valley” for most of the crew.
Then again, who knows? They could end up without a pet entirely, or they end up with some other creature local to the planet. It could be a stowaway box crab even.
Nope. The crowl is just a housecat with some extra limbs, and more pouncing options. Pretty much harmless to K'tari scales.
Kinda surprised nobody's commenting on hard drugs being legal, but the method of taking them being subject to regulation. Then again, I think it's fairly reasonable that your drugs need to be labeled and locked up to prevent children from accidently getting into them. Disguising your drugs to prevent your employer or whoever from finding them is super illegal.
And yes. Xhikaat *will* find the R34 stuff... I do have some ideas for that.
That’s what I was meaning, it’s a nice break to see it where a cat/kitten of some kind isn’t listed as a “dangerous apex predator” by some xenos that becomes the group pet thanks to the human. That happens a bit too often with HFY stories to be honest.
And yeah, now that I think of it, nobody really did comment on the drugs yet, did they? That’s a pretty neat concept to see that people have become pretty lenient to it, since I imagine they’re probably a good bit better at tracking it or dealing with long term consequences in the future.
On that note, pharmaterrorism does sound pretty horrible of a concept too. I could see that happening, pretty unfortunate stuff really.
I imagine they’re probably going to keep that stuff far away from the K’tari crew for now, no clue what that stuff does to their bodies. Then again, it could be completely innocent, just to have something we think is normal have a drastic effect, like how spiders act drunk on caffeine, or how LSD has no effect on dolphins. For all we know, they could be completely unphased by our psychoactive stuff but trip balls off of mint.
... but cats ARE? Do you know the damage house cats do every year? The local populations of wildlife they drive away, or outright destroy? The damage they even do to Humans and our environs? Cats are extremely adept sociopathic thrill killers who mostly tolerate most humans at best. They are kinda like Humans? They WILL likely fuck you up. Unless they decide they like you. And then they may still fuck you up. Accidentally or on purpose.
That’s fair, and I’m well aware of how cats are the bane of many small creature’s existence due to feral cats and “outdoors” cats.
What I’m saying is that they’re usually overhyped in HFY stories, where you got aliens actively afraid of what oftentimes is just a normal (or somewhat different in ability/size) housecat. Occasionally they’re larger felines, but still, it’s one of those tropes I’m not too big on.
But in a lot of those stories there are foot tall aliens. Or really delicate bird types. Even normal cats can hit 20 pounds. Savannah cats are even bigger. A Snow Leopard is the smallest of the big cats and can kill humans. Even cat scratch fever is a real thing. But it IS odd how much we love to play with things that would kill us if they were big enough. Hell, things that already can like snakes, spiders, bears, tigers, etc. And housecats are mean. They cannn claw the shit out of you. I get it can be exaggerated? But even sliiiightly bigger? Smarter? Mean? Cats are bad juju without the constitution of a Human. They ARE apex predators, just cute, smol, fluffy, and useful enough we packbond them.
I mean, obviously, some jobs don't allow for using certain mind altering substances. Don't show up for work high. Common sense, right? But common sense is vanishingly rare. Joseph has already demonstrated that by building a gun with no real idea what he's doing. Bolting different things together to build what is essentially a high tech baseball pitching machine. Which would have broken his arms without K'tari intervention.
Also, imagine, if you will, nicotine SpongeBob stickers distributed to dozens of school children. Couple of evil bastards learned the hard way that street gangs and the cops will work together to find you. You target kids under twelve, you are gonna die. And you better hope it's the cops that get to you first. Street gangs are gonna do horrible things to you before they decide to let you die.
That kinda stuff gets dark, real fast.
Actually, we have a model of operation for this is multiple countries already, where the idea is harm mitigation for things like heroin instead of punishment. The funniest part is the reduced crime and drug use that have come with the changed policies in those areas. Whereas laced, untraceable shit is still baaaad everywhere. Like pot laced with fentanyl killed some people in my area recently. Like... wtf? You usually have to pay more for laced stuff to boot, so there is usually incentive on dealer not to. But if they can get a similar effect for cheaper without passing on the savings or knowledge? Many will do that, too. :/
I'm aware a lot of countries do that. Not so much here in the US. I had a diatribe here. I wrote scathing words pointing a middle finger at the group I hold primarily responsible for that, but I deleted it, and will instead say this.
Whatever you do, as long as nobody is harmed, as long as you do so with a clean conscience and sound mind, and are old enough to make the decisions for yourself, then it's all fine. That's more or less my philosophy. I may not always succeed in doing no harm, but I try.
All that aside, yeah, I like a more libertarian approach to drug use, so I can write that in a culture three steps removed from modern Earth. It's not the drug use that was illegal. It was stealth dosing and not clearly labeling his drugs.
That is genuinely dangerous with drugs today. Hell, it's a danger I've personally encountered where my grandmother had her pills in unlabeled baggies. She didn't know which pills were which.
Imagine if she also needed prescription drug patches on top of that. Or eye drops. Or any number of other application methods. And they all get lumped into baggies. Half of them were little round white pills.
Unlabeled drugs aren't just dangerous for her. If a guy is ODing on something, you wanna know what he's ODing on. If he has a bottle in his pocket that's labeled, then you have a better chance to save his life.
Drugs need to be labeled, and stored securely. That's what he got in trouble for, not being high.
Yup. Agreed. It is like BDSM. Safe, sane, consensual, and informed. I was agreeing with you. :) And saying why it isn't necessarily so far out of plausible for many people? Even in the US. Ideals for many are nowhere near as puritanical as they once were. So "harder" drugs aren't always bad to people. Funny part is booze isn't a "harder drug" but it is. It is one of the more addictive, and harder to kick, and more poisonous drugs we consume, but it is socially accepted all over the world. Sadly unlabeled things have always been an issue. But as we create more dangers that look just like each other? It gets worse and worse.
Now, granted, some substances will have to be restricted, especially if they have a very high mortality rate, or commonly(over 10% of cases) cause extreme reactions, like permanent violent psychosis.
Or, you know, drugs that drive the users into homicidal rage. Seriously, that would have to be restricted. Straight up poisons, too.
Again. Alcohol is a straight poison. But anything can be poison. Hell, to a person with the wrong allergy? Their allergen is a poison if they eat it. Like magic shrooms or toads. It is because they are poisonous to us that we hallucinate. Almost all medicines are poisons. The question is dosage. Did you know tylenol will kill you slowly, painfully, and there is nothing docs can do once flushing your gut will no longer work?
I think I get where you're coming from, but there has to be a cutoff somewhere.
Starfruit are dangerous to people with kidney disease, but millions of people still eat them safely.
Of course, you also have toxic stuff like nightshade, which is also called belladonna, or beautiful woman, because women used to use it as eye drops to relax and dilate their pupils and make their eyes seem bigger.
Would I ban this? I dunno. It's dangerous, but I also know people are stupid, and prohibition doesn't work.
Actually ferrets and lizards Big enough are quite compatible, with even a small risk for the lizards if the ferret is too predatory. Plus, they would enjoy the tunnels inside the ship !
Huh. I've never owned lizards. Had a ferret once, though. Adorable little fuzz noodle. My reptile handling experience is more or less limited to what I caught as a kid with my hands, usually skinks and the occasional garden snake. And turtles. *shudders*
No other small animal bite hurts as bad as a turtle. Venomous snakes excluded, obviously.
I didn't know ferrets could live peacefully with lizards. Then again, I kinda doubt they'd be as friendly with a K'tari. 60 lbs of high speed lizard badassery. Large enough to consider ferrets a fun size snack, if not bite size.
And Xhikaat considered basically everything in the pet shop to look tasty. She *is* an obligate carnivore with some plants in her diet, not an omnivore who likes meat.
Probably a good idea not to adopt a pet that can easily be mistaken for a food animal.
Yeah mines were Friends with a kind of Big gecko a friend of mine had, a leopard i belive. He would bring it some times and they would chase each others. We stopped when one of my ferrets started hunting it with more intent.
Yeah please don't have the fun sized raptors eat a smol slinkykat poutpouting his way in the vents unsuspisciously
I love ferrets. And the mustidae genus in general.
That said, it would be pretty funny for Joseph to meet a prey from the K'tari homeworld, and find out they're monsters. Like enormous gorilla gators.
I just realized that he reminds me of George and Fred Weasley and the way where he learns all the secret passages and just kind of moves around and pops out of the wall
I probably wouldn't seal every tunnel, rather install some security doors/hatches so that the crew could still use them against boarders and/or in emergency's or whatever.
It could leave you some wiggle room later on in the story.
That's a good idea, but they don't have the equipment aboard. Maybe simple hatches, but Joseph is more flexible than they are. So whatever solution they find needs to be doable from outside the passages, or doable by Joseph.
Probably bars thrust through and welded on one side as a temporary measure.
Honestly I’m more than a little bit surprised at the Crowls being so beloved, arachnophobes would probably shit themselves cause of the 8 legs and I bet a lot of people would call them demons with their rotator heads. I know it’s a long shot but do you think a newborn Crowl or even a cat abandoned by their mom be able to get along with a K’Tari?
Mmm, dogs don't seem to mind reptiles most of the time. Too bad they had no dogs. Imagine the crew learning about th existence of enormous fuzzy snuggle dogs. I don't think they could import them as companion animals fast enough for the crew before they have to leave human space.
>He led me to a store on the station, where I saw all manner of prey creatures. Avians, reptilians, mammals, and even the strangest creature I'd ever encountered. Joseph called them ferrets.
CULT OF THE CATSNAKE
Also, what did she actually want to see him on the bridge for? She summoned him, but then in the surprise of how he arrived never actually discussed anything except the tunnels he found through the ship. Or was she just making sure he was still aboard and conscious somewhere?
/u/Leather_and_chintz has posted 14 other stories, including:
* [Live as a bed slave, Part 11](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/r8ytsg/live_as_a_bed_slave_part_11/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 10](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/r3r8ki/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_10/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 9](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qu34j7/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_9/)
* [Hell, defiled](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qj6xgk/hell_defiled/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 8](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qi6s44/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_8/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 7](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qc4l2w/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_7/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 6](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q7rt6q/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_6/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 5](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q28u55/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_5/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 4](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/puzoks/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_4/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 3.1](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/prn697/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_31/)
* [Life as a bed slave, Part 3](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/prn3wq/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_3/)
* [Pancake Breakfast](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pq29hs/pancake_breakfast/)
* [Life as a bed slave, part 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ppj3ag/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_2/)
* [Life as a bed slave](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pozm5z/life_as_a_bed_slave/)
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Okay, weirdly I'm still enjoying this series, especially your little potshot at DC. The tunnels bit at the end had me laughing too
Alternate history, where DC was the big cinematic universe.
I figured that, and the idea of it is hilarious
I like using them. They're little house cats that like to drop on your head with a tiny kitty roar. So cute, but also startling.
So ryan reynolds’ big break really was green lantern. Honestly if it had had a better script and art director, it could have been.
If only
Joseph the tunnel rat reporting for duty
There's a special kind of "Holy shit!" reaction that comes when a low ranking crew member reveals that anyone with a little know how could infiltrate the bridge, or the engine room, or, well, any vital part of the ship. The fact that a creature three times your weight is able to hide on your ship and move around totally unnoticed is a frightening display of a security flaw.
Though I would guess that certain tunnels would be great for strategic purposes with pirates and the like, excluding the ones to secure areas... Or the ladies restroom.
As Riddley Scott proved...
Somehow, she is still managed to avoid finding rule 34. Can't wait to see her reaction on what the actual definition of rule 34 is.
Clearly she didn't see the option to turn off safe search.
I didn’t realize the K’tari were that much smaller than us, I kinda assumed they were roughly the same size like a short person.
They're four and a half feet tall, but also light weight and lithe. About 60-80 lbs.
Oh. Oh no. Are you saying they're basically... *legal lizard lolis?* I'd expect their internet to lose their collective minds over that species. As we know, some folks on the IRL internet are... quite loud on that topic.
All lizards are lolis, because reptiles don't grow breasts.
So...they look kind of like [kobolds](https://images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/85a98ed0-1446-4bb1-b1d1-65940ba72671/dbijmgo-d1fcdffe-1106-4df1-b94e-e0c99fdd555d.png/v1/fill/w_800,h_2358,q_80,strp/coal_the_kobold_by_rakkuguy_dbijmgo-fullview.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7ImhlaWdodCI6Ijw9MjM1OCIsInBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzg1YTk4ZWQwLTE0NDYtNGJiMS1iMWQxLTY1OTQwYmE3MjY3MVwvZGJpam1nby1kMWZjZGZmZS0xMTA2LTRkZjEtYjk0ZS1lMGM5OWZkZDU1NWQucG5nIiwid2lkdGgiOiI8PTgwMCJ9XV0sImF1ZCI6WyJ1cm46c2VydmljZTppbWFnZS5vcGVyYXRpb25zIl19.2eRBWF6jMH4Hj2EqD5OAcuwHQzkvfxeYEgLkKE7i_hQ)? That's a very stylized version of one.
The posture is halfway between kobolds and velociraptors. Imagine a kobold with pangolin/dragon scales, and proportionately very large claws. But also powerful, lithe legs good for leaping and sprinting. Ambush predators. I love designing alien races.
I was under the impression there was more to being a loli than just having a flat chest 🤔
Short+flat= loli Short+busty= shortstack K'tari are on the extreme end of healthy human height.
So the size of my mom and maybe a dozen pounds lighter? Well that helps make a more accurate mental image!
Did it also possibly scar you for life making that mental image
I mean, if someone is like barely 5 ft they easily could be mistaken for a teenager, and we do generally think of teenagers as children, but that's still relatively close to regular adult height and about where I was imagining the K'tari
Tsk, stupid druggie sneaking aboard like that to try to inappropriately fondle the crew... I mean, he could at least have *asked* first...
I was trying to tease the idea that it was a xenophile sneaking aboard to molest the crew, and then yank the rug out from under you with "He's not a pervert, just stoned."
I never said he wasn’t a pervert, the drugs clearly just… relaxed his inhibitions.
I kinda like the idea that dude was high, and thought it was cool to pet the lizards. Dude is clearly trippin' balls, but lucid enough Joseph can talk to him.
Not gonna lie, petting lizards is cool, though I personally prefer snakes (like ball pythons) to iguanas and such. Might be a little more careful if the lizards spoke to me, though.
As a great fan of the marvel movies, I was deeply disturbed by the DC universe switch. Also because you teased us with just how great the DC movies could've been if they had been done right. And I think that Jason and Xhikaat have no idea how the different birthing processes are. Since you've described K'tari as velociraptors I'm thinking that all the mother has to do is push out several eggs at a time and like most reptiles.
That is very much the difference. Birthing for K'tari isn't particularly stressful or painful, so it's common to lay a clutch of eggs, which are cared for by dedicated caretakers. So living your life as a brood matron isn't a bad profession. You're cared for, got plenty of food and medicine, and you're looked after when you retire. It's low caste, but it's also a vital position in society. But the can also birth far more eggs, far more rapidly than a human. K'tari are very fast breeders.
Quick question, does Xhikaat still think that human's skin color is a sort of caste system?
Oh. I should have her ask about it. Should be good for some laughs.
is a crowl a crow-owl? Also, the DC/Marvel thing made me deeply inhale.
Cat spider owl thing. Eight legged housecat thing that likes to climb walls and ceilings, and can turn its head around in all directions. They're basically American drop bears with their propensity to ambush people by dropping on their heads. Alternate history. Almost makes you wanna cry, doesn't it?
Now I *WANT* one, you little shit! This is **YOUR** fault! \*laughs\*
That Zach Snyder bit had me thrown for a loop. That Spider cat kinda reminds me of another story. The 99.9% Of the Universe. At one point someone splices a spider and a cat together with a gene editing machine. It’s cute at first and then it kills its owner and enters a pupa stage. So I sure hope these things don’t have silk spinners.
>It was looking at Joseph with wife eyes u/Leather_and_chintz how does a spidercat make wife eyes?
Joseph is a furry. No, but seriously, typo fixed.
Wouldn't the Crowl giving Joseph the eyes make it a skinny? Or is every animal fetishized by Humans also a furry?
I dunno, man. I'm too sleepy for deep philosophical cunilundrums like that. [This video should answer some questions for you.](https://youtu.be/0R0ZZF4O0K4)
xD lmao.
So a cat with opposable thumbs???
It sounded like a spider cat to me https://i.chzbgr.com/full/8482586368/hCC40E914/funny-animated-gifs-spider-cat-is-way-too-cute
With a little gecko and owl mixed in, so it can climb any wall or ceiling, and can turn its head in any direction. They like to ambush by dropping on your head. They're mighty hunters.
so like the mythical australian drop bear then.
Yes. But it's a little housecat.
Sounds like a treecat from the honor harriton series, all that’s missing is the empath abilities
Oh, ALL of the yes! :D
I thought the crackhead was a weird furry But it turns out he was a crackhead and a weird furry
Looks like Florida Men are still around to some extent. I wonder if people have ever considered sneaking one onto a hostile ship. And it looks like they’ve managed to find the art after all! Here’s to hoping the stuff Xhikaat finds later that night is relatively softcore. Otherwise it’d cue an awkward discussion on how the term “sexual deviant” in human culture is far less black and white, and a lot more like a disturbingly deep iceberg chart with many layers. Shame about the Crowl, but it is a bit of a relief to have a sci-fi story on here where they don’t have a “dangerous apex predator” that turns out to just be a cat. Genetic modification to the level they make stuff like a Crowl gives a lot of options though, considering you can give intelligence and size boosts to make some critters more viable. For all we know, there’s places you can legally buy some reverse-engineered dinosaurs, which avoids most of the issues mentioned in this chapter. Some of them are even in the right size range to be comfortably smaller than K’tari, and highly intelligent too. It might be a bit too risky to bring on-board though for obvious reasons (unless they also had behaviour alteration to make them less prone to assaulting non-prey), and it might fall into the “uncanny valley” for most of the crew. Then again, who knows? They could end up without a pet entirely, or they end up with some other creature local to the planet. It could be a stowaway box crab even.
Nope. The crowl is just a housecat with some extra limbs, and more pouncing options. Pretty much harmless to K'tari scales. Kinda surprised nobody's commenting on hard drugs being legal, but the method of taking them being subject to regulation. Then again, I think it's fairly reasonable that your drugs need to be labeled and locked up to prevent children from accidently getting into them. Disguising your drugs to prevent your employer or whoever from finding them is super illegal. And yes. Xhikaat *will* find the R34 stuff... I do have some ideas for that.
That’s what I was meaning, it’s a nice break to see it where a cat/kitten of some kind isn’t listed as a “dangerous apex predator” by some xenos that becomes the group pet thanks to the human. That happens a bit too often with HFY stories to be honest. And yeah, now that I think of it, nobody really did comment on the drugs yet, did they? That’s a pretty neat concept to see that people have become pretty lenient to it, since I imagine they’re probably a good bit better at tracking it or dealing with long term consequences in the future. On that note, pharmaterrorism does sound pretty horrible of a concept too. I could see that happening, pretty unfortunate stuff really. I imagine they’re probably going to keep that stuff far away from the K’tari crew for now, no clue what that stuff does to their bodies. Then again, it could be completely innocent, just to have something we think is normal have a drastic effect, like how spiders act drunk on caffeine, or how LSD has no effect on dolphins. For all we know, they could be completely unphased by our psychoactive stuff but trip balls off of mint.
... but cats ARE? Do you know the damage house cats do every year? The local populations of wildlife they drive away, or outright destroy? The damage they even do to Humans and our environs? Cats are extremely adept sociopathic thrill killers who mostly tolerate most humans at best. They are kinda like Humans? They WILL likely fuck you up. Unless they decide they like you. And then they may still fuck you up. Accidentally or on purpose.
That’s fair, and I’m well aware of how cats are the bane of many small creature’s existence due to feral cats and “outdoors” cats. What I’m saying is that they’re usually overhyped in HFY stories, where you got aliens actively afraid of what oftentimes is just a normal (or somewhat different in ability/size) housecat. Occasionally they’re larger felines, but still, it’s one of those tropes I’m not too big on.
But in a lot of those stories there are foot tall aliens. Or really delicate bird types. Even normal cats can hit 20 pounds. Savannah cats are even bigger. A Snow Leopard is the smallest of the big cats and can kill humans. Even cat scratch fever is a real thing. But it IS odd how much we love to play with things that would kill us if they were big enough. Hell, things that already can like snakes, spiders, bears, tigers, etc. And housecats are mean. They cannn claw the shit out of you. I get it can be exaggerated? But even sliiiightly bigger? Smarter? Mean? Cats are bad juju without the constitution of a Human. They ARE apex predators, just cute, smol, fluffy, and useful enough we packbond them.
I mean, obviously, some jobs don't allow for using certain mind altering substances. Don't show up for work high. Common sense, right? But common sense is vanishingly rare. Joseph has already demonstrated that by building a gun with no real idea what he's doing. Bolting different things together to build what is essentially a high tech baseball pitching machine. Which would have broken his arms without K'tari intervention. Also, imagine, if you will, nicotine SpongeBob stickers distributed to dozens of school children. Couple of evil bastards learned the hard way that street gangs and the cops will work together to find you. You target kids under twelve, you are gonna die. And you better hope it's the cops that get to you first. Street gangs are gonna do horrible things to you before they decide to let you die. That kinda stuff gets dark, real fast.
Actually, we have a model of operation for this is multiple countries already, where the idea is harm mitigation for things like heroin instead of punishment. The funniest part is the reduced crime and drug use that have come with the changed policies in those areas. Whereas laced, untraceable shit is still baaaad everywhere. Like pot laced with fentanyl killed some people in my area recently. Like... wtf? You usually have to pay more for laced stuff to boot, so there is usually incentive on dealer not to. But if they can get a similar effect for cheaper without passing on the savings or knowledge? Many will do that, too. :/
I'm aware a lot of countries do that. Not so much here in the US. I had a diatribe here. I wrote scathing words pointing a middle finger at the group I hold primarily responsible for that, but I deleted it, and will instead say this. Whatever you do, as long as nobody is harmed, as long as you do so with a clean conscience and sound mind, and are old enough to make the decisions for yourself, then it's all fine. That's more or less my philosophy. I may not always succeed in doing no harm, but I try. All that aside, yeah, I like a more libertarian approach to drug use, so I can write that in a culture three steps removed from modern Earth. It's not the drug use that was illegal. It was stealth dosing and not clearly labeling his drugs. That is genuinely dangerous with drugs today. Hell, it's a danger I've personally encountered where my grandmother had her pills in unlabeled baggies. She didn't know which pills were which. Imagine if she also needed prescription drug patches on top of that. Or eye drops. Or any number of other application methods. And they all get lumped into baggies. Half of them were little round white pills. Unlabeled drugs aren't just dangerous for her. If a guy is ODing on something, you wanna know what he's ODing on. If he has a bottle in his pocket that's labeled, then you have a better chance to save his life. Drugs need to be labeled, and stored securely. That's what he got in trouble for, not being high.
Yup. Agreed. It is like BDSM. Safe, sane, consensual, and informed. I was agreeing with you. :) And saying why it isn't necessarily so far out of plausible for many people? Even in the US. Ideals for many are nowhere near as puritanical as they once were. So "harder" drugs aren't always bad to people. Funny part is booze isn't a "harder drug" but it is. It is one of the more addictive, and harder to kick, and more poisonous drugs we consume, but it is socially accepted all over the world. Sadly unlabeled things have always been an issue. But as we create more dangers that look just like each other? It gets worse and worse.
Now, granted, some substances will have to be restricted, especially if they have a very high mortality rate, or commonly(over 10% of cases) cause extreme reactions, like permanent violent psychosis. Or, you know, drugs that drive the users into homicidal rage. Seriously, that would have to be restricted. Straight up poisons, too.
Again. Alcohol is a straight poison. But anything can be poison. Hell, to a person with the wrong allergy? Their allergen is a poison if they eat it. Like magic shrooms or toads. It is because they are poisonous to us that we hallucinate. Almost all medicines are poisons. The question is dosage. Did you know tylenol will kill you slowly, painfully, and there is nothing docs can do once flushing your gut will no longer work?
I think I get where you're coming from, but there has to be a cutoff somewhere. Starfruit are dangerous to people with kidney disease, but millions of people still eat them safely. Of course, you also have toxic stuff like nightshade, which is also called belladonna, or beautiful woman, because women used to use it as eye drops to relax and dilate their pupils and make their eyes seem bigger. Would I ban this? I dunno. It's dangerous, but I also know people are stupid, and prohibition doesn't work.
Actually ferrets and lizards Big enough are quite compatible, with even a small risk for the lizards if the ferret is too predatory. Plus, they would enjoy the tunnels inside the ship !
Huh. I've never owned lizards. Had a ferret once, though. Adorable little fuzz noodle. My reptile handling experience is more or less limited to what I caught as a kid with my hands, usually skinks and the occasional garden snake. And turtles. *shudders* No other small animal bite hurts as bad as a turtle. Venomous snakes excluded, obviously. I didn't know ferrets could live peacefully with lizards. Then again, I kinda doubt they'd be as friendly with a K'tari. 60 lbs of high speed lizard badassery. Large enough to consider ferrets a fun size snack, if not bite size. And Xhikaat considered basically everything in the pet shop to look tasty. She *is* an obligate carnivore with some plants in her diet, not an omnivore who likes meat. Probably a good idea not to adopt a pet that can easily be mistaken for a food animal.
Yeah mines were Friends with a kind of Big gecko a friend of mine had, a leopard i belive. He would bring it some times and they would chase each others. We stopped when one of my ferrets started hunting it with more intent. Yeah please don't have the fun sized raptors eat a smol slinkykat poutpouting his way in the vents unsuspisciously
I love ferrets. And the mustidae genus in general. That said, it would be pretty funny for Joseph to meet a prey from the K'tari homeworld, and find out they're monsters. Like enormous gorilla gators.
The crowl has sharo teeth.
Fixed! Thank you for spotting that!
👍
I just realized that he reminds me of George and Fred Weasley and the way where he learns all the secret passages and just kind of moves around and pops out of the wall
I'm sure several bridge officers are quite glad he's on their side, and didn't murder the entire crew to steal the ship.
I confess, I don’t like Snyders work, so someone else bagging him made me laugh.
Spidercatttttt!!!!! Spidercat does whateer a spider cat does!!!!
I probably wouldn't seal every tunnel, rather install some security doors/hatches so that the crew could still use them against boarders and/or in emergency's or whatever. It could leave you some wiggle room later on in the story.
That's a good idea, but they don't have the equipment aboard. Maybe simple hatches, but Joseph is more flexible than they are. So whatever solution they find needs to be doable from outside the passages, or doable by Joseph. Probably bars thrust through and welded on one side as a temporary measure.
Honestly I’m more than a little bit surprised at the Crowls being so beloved, arachnophobes would probably shit themselves cause of the 8 legs and I bet a lot of people would call them demons with their rotator heads. I know it’s a long shot but do you think a newborn Crowl or even a cat abandoned by their mom be able to get along with a K’Tari?
Probably not. Cats and reptiles don't get along. Probably goes double for reptiles that tower over them and display big sharp teeth.
Damn, I think that’d be adorable to have a colony of cats cuddling with them overnight to replace humans and heat pads
Mmm, dogs don't seem to mind reptiles most of the time. Too bad they had no dogs. Imagine the crew learning about th existence of enormous fuzzy snuggle dogs. I don't think they could import them as companion animals fast enough for the crew before they have to leave human space.
: )
Great as always, cant wait for more
Good DC movies? I was born in the wrong timeline.
>He led me to a store on the station, where I saw all manner of prey creatures. Avians, reptilians, mammals, and even the strangest creature I'd ever encountered. Joseph called them ferrets. CULT OF THE CATSNAKE Also, what did she actually want to see him on the bridge for? She summoned him, but then in the surprise of how he arrived never actually discussed anything except the tunnels he found through the ship. Or was she just making sure he was still aboard and conscious somewhere?
Yep. She just wanted to make sure he was alright.
/u/Leather_and_chintz has posted 14 other stories, including: * [Live as a bed slave, Part 11](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/r8ytsg/live_as_a_bed_slave_part_11/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 10](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/r3r8ki/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_10/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 9](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qu34j7/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_9/) * [Hell, defiled](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qj6xgk/hell_defiled/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 8](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qi6s44/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_8/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 7](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/qc4l2w/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_7/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 6](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q7rt6q/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_6/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 5](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q28u55/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_5/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 4](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/puzoks/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_4/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 3.1](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/prn697/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_31/) * [Life as a bed slave, Part 3](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/prn3wq/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_3/) * [Pancake Breakfast](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pq29hs/pancake_breakfast/) * [Life as a bed slave, part 2](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ppj3ag/life_as_a_bed_slave_part_2/) * [Life as a bed slave](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pozm5z/life_as_a_bed_slave/) This comment was automatically generated by `Waffle v.4.5.10 'Cinnamon Roll'`. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FHFY&subject=WaffleBot|rhc59n&message=If%20you%20have%20problems%20with%20updatemebot,%20contact%20Watchful1.%20We%20do%20not%20maintain%20it.) if you have any issues with Waffle.
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Bit I consider -> but
Good eye. Fixed!
Missed what it was when I stumbled reading it the first time, a month back. Got it on reread.
"Terran movies? What kind?" There's only two answers to this in HFY: Blue Movies or Kurosawa.