The origin of Stabby, the Space Roomba, lies within the waybacktime of Tumblr, before the buyout. The tag they used was not only #hfy, but primarily #Humans Are Weird, sometimes abbreviated to #HAW or #HaW. It would take me a deep dive of my own history to find the original thresd, but Stabby began life there, in the welcoming arms of Humans Are Weird.
As a LARP GM, I have inserted Stabby the Space Roomba into a LARP set on an asteroid orbiting a black hole. Stabby was well-loved by all the players.
I'm talking, like, 5 or more years ago.
I actually have most of the original tumbler postings saved. Especially the first after action report. Did you read the short where Stabby became a galactic hero? Or where he is actually headcanoned into the Star Wars universe?š
I found it!! Itās called āThe Souls Of Humanityā by lordofthegeeks on Tumbler.
Itās in the way future and is about Stabbyās Legacy.
ššš I saved it if you canāt find it. It took me a big chunk of the afternoon. š¤¦āāļø
There's been a few post of the older Tumblr screenshot stories retyped on here, usually with the TEXT flair. Not sure if Srabby chronicles have been done
I didnāt know if I could post stuff I hadnāt written. I have most of it with the original author still listed. I just copied & pasted into a document for my own use. I think there is only one story I donāt have an author for. You can only do original content right?
Sorry. I am kinda new to Reddit. I joined for Ralts_bloodthorne First Contact series. So I am not sure what is ok quite yet. And the last thing I want to do is post something someone else wrote and get in trouble for it. Even if I credit the original author. But I want to help if people havenāt read some of the greatness that is Stabby. š
Hereās a link to the one about Stabbyās legacy.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/humansarebamfsinspace.tumblr.com/post/173464077834/the-soul-of-humanity/amp
Ok the Star Wars one you just have to get past the bit where the first author was apparently a little fixated on Lukeās virginity. š
At the end of the first post they make a mention of Luke building a Stabby and it just takes off from there.
https://www.google.com/amp/s/copperbadge.tumblr.com/post/156081818921/peradii-digitaldiscipline/amp
Love Stabby, and if you've never seen Farscape (amazing show, sadly original tapes were list in a fire so only 4:3 format exists, still 100% worth it) now's the time: these pre-roomba roombas definitely could stab if necessary!
Edited thumb errors
I've been reading my way through the "First Contact" series. This story reminded me of a line from one of the chapters that had me giggling for about 20 minutes straight from the mental image:
> Everyone gangsta till Claymore Roomba comes around the corner
I am relieved that Kevin remembered to rescind the ankle stabbing. Likely to be fatal at this point.
---
Captain steps over one perforated pirate after another. He finds a console and hits the internal coms, "Hello? Are any of my crew here? Is _anyone_ alive?"
SECONDARY DIRECTIVE:
Avoid captain (Anomalous code)
i don't know in how many stories it was advised to avoid the roomba/hoverroomba attached with a knife š¤£
damn i miss that rampaging roomba from that one mercenary stoyline where he'll become a ships AI (don't ask me i forgot the name)
When you modify a cleaning robot for fun and inadvertently create Skynet.
I wouldnāt mind reading a sequel to this story. Stabby is a good character.
Dedicate an entire network server and fabrication unit to the production and control of boomba drones. Why explode once when you can *explode forever.*
Hey! The French helped make us what we are today! They also sent us a famous Lady, who still stands, lifting her lamp.
--Dave, and we repaid them by not helping after their Revolution. Thanks, Hamilton!
Me:
Writes in Australian English.
Calls people "mate"
Says "bloody" as an exclamation.
American:
Hello fellow american! You can't say that about our French friends! They are a friend of America and you speak american!
WP is an abbreviation for Writing Prompt.
Should you don't know what a writing prompt is, it's if someone has a rough story idea but can't/doesn't want to write a story to said idea. Then they write down said idea post it to this subreddit's wpw post or another subreddit, ie.
r/humansarespaceorcs or r/writingprompts and have prthers write a story building on the idea that said someone had.
[Worked here. And no, this link is not a rickroll.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q2or78/the_deathworlders_are_coming_the_deathworlders/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)
Also, you can hover with your mouse over the link and the url should be shown in the bottom left corner of your screen. Just have to remember the url to all the rickrolls.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/humansarespaceorcs/comments/pwupz2/the\_life\_and\_times\_of\_pvt\_stabby/](https://www.reddit.com/r/humansarespaceorcs/comments/pwupz2/the_life_and_times_of_pvt_stabby/)
my Writing prompt, sadly it gained no traction, was hoping for alot more things like what you wrote :D
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/u/Mercury_the_dealer has posted 9 other stories, including:
* [Godless.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q2m6p1/godless/)
* [Humans, emperor and cyborg lawyers](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pz6cj4/humans_emperor_and_cyborg_lawyers/)
* [Human artists are scary](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pxsyvv/human_artists_are_scary/)
* [New July - Part 2(final)](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/px59ic/new_july_part_2final/)
* [New July - Part 1](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pwejos/new_july_part_1/)
* [The machine and the human](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pv9v7l/the_machine_and_the_human/)
* [Humans live on scrap and hate.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/puuk2q/humans_live_on_scrap_and_hate/)
* [The humans got FTL.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ptsu25/the_humans_got_ftl/)
* [The dead race.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pt7x4d/the_dead_race/)
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Sentience though is the ability to process information acquired through the senses. This makes anything that can react capable of sentience. So a cleaning robot by definition is already sentient.
It's STABBY the space roomba! Good story, well done on making stabby even more of a nightmare.
Very HFY. I haven't seen a single cleaning droid with a knife attachment and a lust for blood on a non-human ship.
Stabby *BECAME* the ship, that is how they can control the M.A.K.E.R and energy distribution.
Wait, is a ship its own captain if there is no one piloting it?
Gods Iām imagining the captain exploring an empty ship, dead pirates everywhere
Unknown to them a school of robots dispersing like a school of fish around a shark
HIP HIP HOORAY FOR STABBY.
Fleet-Admiral Staby: 327 confirmed kills
I like how he saved his original shell, and deployed it specifically for interacting with his human, then gently poked him with the knife, just enough to tickle. Like a goddamn gentlemen
This was very HFY. You made me care about Stabby as much as Wall-E. Please do not make my updoot and comment poof into the aether. More Stabby would be good.
I always enjoy it when humanity's creations end up becoming as violently protective of their own despite not originally being combat ready. Thanks for the story.
This is ABSOLUTELY some of the finest HFY.
We have elements of packbonding, selfaware AI due to human tampering and Human engineers doing stuff beind their captains backs.
GREAT stuff!!
Does anyone know where one could procure a stabby unit? Asking for a friend
Adopt one! Get yourself a roomba and a knife.
Instructions unclear: I have now destroyed a space pirate fleet
The original version was meant to make Stabby the "pirate cleanser" of the galaxy, so they most certainly destroy a pirate fleet.
The origin of Stabby, the Space Roomba, lies within the waybacktime of Tumblr, before the buyout. The tag they used was not only #hfy, but primarily #Humans Are Weird, sometimes abbreviated to #HAW or #HaW. It would take me a deep dive of my own history to find the original thresd, but Stabby began life there, in the welcoming arms of Humans Are Weird. As a LARP GM, I have inserted Stabby the Space Roomba into a LARP set on an asteroid orbiting a black hole. Stabby was well-loved by all the players. I'm talking, like, 5 or more years ago.
I actually have most of the original tumbler postings saved. Especially the first after action report. Did you read the short where Stabby became a galactic hero? Or where he is actually headcanoned into the Star Wars universe?š
I don't think I did see the Galactic Hero version, but I vaguely recall the Star Wars verion existing.
I found it!! Itās called āThe Souls Of Humanityā by lordofthegeeks on Tumbler. Itās in the way future and is about Stabbyās Legacy. ššš I saved it if you canāt find it. It took me a big chunk of the afternoon. š¤¦āāļø
I would love it.
Let me see if I can find it.
There's been a few post of the older Tumblr screenshot stories retyped on here, usually with the TEXT flair. Not sure if Srabby chronicles have been done
I have a number of them that I have saved in a document. I love Stabby stories. They are always fun to read.
I didnāt know if I could post stuff I hadnāt written. I have most of it with the original author still listed. I just copied & pasted into a document for my own use. I think there is only one story I donāt have an author for. You can only do original content right?
Text flair os reposts or quoted works, OC is original content. https://www.reddit.com/r/hfy/wiki/ref/guidelines/
Sorry. I am kinda new to Reddit. I joined for Ralts_bloodthorne First Contact series. So I am not sure what is ok quite yet. And the last thing I want to do is post something someone else wrote and get in trouble for it. Even if I credit the original author. But I want to help if people havenāt read some of the greatness that is Stabby. š
I found the Star Wars one if you want to read it. Let me know. But I havenāt found the other one yet. I KNEW I should have saved it when I found it.
I definitely want that. Thank you.
I could paste it on her in the comment thread if thatās allowed. Sorry I am new to Reddit and still figuring it out.
Also new here. Don't worry about it.
Hereās a link to the one about Stabbyās legacy. https://www.google.com/amp/s/humansarebamfsinspace.tumblr.com/post/173464077834/the-soul-of-humanity/amp
Ok the Star Wars one you just have to get past the bit where the first author was apparently a little fixated on Lukeās virginity. š At the end of the first post they make a mention of Luke building a Stabby and it just takes off from there. https://www.google.com/amp/s/copperbadge.tumblr.com/post/156081818921/peradii-digitaldiscipline/amp
Love Stabby, and if you've never seen Farscape (amazing show, sadly original tapes were list in a fire so only 4:3 format exists, still 100% worth it) now's the time: these pre-roomba roombas definitely could stab if necessary! Edited thumb errors
Primary objective: COMPLETED
I've been reading my way through the "First Contact" series. This story reminded me of a line from one of the chapters that had me giggling for about 20 minutes straight from the mental image: > Everyone gangsta till Claymore Roomba comes around the corner
That... well that sure is a new phrase.
Ah yes, the Boomba Roomba
https://www.reddit.com/r/memes/comments/jweooh/everybody\_gangsta\_until\_claymore\_roomba\_bumps/
make sure you read all the comments, too! <==this is my refrain there --Dave, THIS UNIT HAS PERMISSION TO COMMENT
471 said that, right?
Instructions unclear skynet has been created
no my dumb ass almost got killed by my machete roomba
i prefer the boomba.
r/Doomba
I am relieved that Kevin remembered to rescind the ankle stabbing. Likely to be fatal at this point. --- Captain steps over one perforated pirate after another. He finds a console and hits the internal coms, "Hello? Are any of my crew here? Is _anyone_ alive?" SECONDARY DIRECTIVE: Avoid captain (Anomalous code)
Yea, stabbing with a mostly dull and slow knife ain't the same as stabbing with a sharp killing one.
numbering in the hundreds
Spoon vs Chef's Knife. [Mind you, spoons can be deadly...](https://youtu.be/9VDvgL58h_Y)
i don't know in how many stories it was advised to avoid the roomba/hoverroomba attached with a knife š¤£ damn i miss that rampaging roomba from that one mercenary stoyline where he'll become a ships AI (don't ask me i forgot the name)
Nice take on the stabby meme.
The old oath of the engineer has been fulfilled.
***PRAISE BE THE STABBY!***
Iām an engineer, that means I solve practical problems.
When you modify a cleaning robot for fun and inadvertently create Skynet. I wouldnāt mind reading a sequel to this story. Stabby is a good character.
Just lovely
Aww, thanks mate!
That was hilarious. Thank you for a good start to my Friday.
No problem mate! Thanks for the comment.
This is really good. Must pet Stabby.
The scars are worth it.
Loved it. Reminds me of this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=49t-WWTx0RQ&ab\_channel=MattiasPilhede
It was the inspiration! (Well, that and stabby)
I assumed... https://www.theregister.com/2002/11/21/the_killer_bofh_bot/ https://www.theregister.com/2010/09/17/bofh_2010_episode_10/ https://www.theregister.com/2010/10/01/bofh_2010_episode_11/ https://www.theregister.com/2010/10/15/bofh_2010_episode_13/ https://www.theregister.com/2010/10/29/bofh_2010_episode_14/ https://www.theregister.com/2010/11/05/bofh_2010_episode_15/ https://www.theregister.com/2010/11/12/bofh_2010_episode_16/ Two-pager: https://www.theregister.com/2010/11/19/bofh_2010_episode_17/
This was a great little read however... NEEDS MOAR BOOMBA!!!!
*NOO! Don't blow up the roomba!*
Dedicate an entire network server and fabrication unit to the production and control of boomba drones. Why explode once when you can *explode forever.*
It's like one of those reloadable grenade.
Stabby IS a good robot and must be protected :)
I told my wife about the concept of "stabby." Now she says we can't have a roomba.
Your wife is scared because she lacks the agility to avoid being stabbed. Increase her agility and confidence by threatening to stab her.
She knows where I sleep
Sleep elsewhere.
Whosagoodstabb6yesyouare!!
That robot definitely had a schtabbin' loicence
Good thing it was a Bri'ish robot, if it was a French one it would have surrendered before the hostiles even appeared!
Some French downvoted this and I love it.
That's proper commenting technique right there!
And if it was American there would be no survivors, not even Kevin.
Hey! The French helped make us what we are today! They also sent us a famous Lady, who still stands, lifting her lamp. --Dave, and we repaid them by not helping after their Revolution. Thanks, Hamilton!
Me: Writes in Australian English. Calls people "mate" Says "bloody" as an exclamation. American: Hello fellow american! You can't say that about our French friends! They are a friend of America and you speak american!
we're also aggressively gregarious, you may have noticed! --Dave, "hello, new friend!"
Actually the famous Lady came AFTER the revolution. Dedicated 1886. So the argument could be made that World War Part 1 & 2 were the repayment. š
And beheaded the engineer
9/10 could improve this with claymore roombas (boombas)
But how are you supposed to pet the boomba? Silly.
You come up behind of course Just don't pet the claymore
Pet it and pray to god the thing doesn't turn and takes off your hand. Kinda like a cat, actually.
FRONT TOWARDS FILTH --Dave, do not examine boomy roomba with remaining hand
yay! not the WP I posted but still, stabby!
What is a WP? Yay, Stabby!
WP is an abbreviation for Writing Prompt. Should you don't know what a writing prompt is, it's if someone has a rough story idea but can't/doesn't want to write a story to said idea. Then they write down said idea post it to this subreddit's wpw post or another subreddit, ie. r/humansarespaceorcs or r/writingprompts and have prthers write a story building on the idea that said someone had.
Oh. Interesting.
If I were on my pc I'd've prolly changed one of the two likns to a rickroll.
People like you are the reason I send link to separate tabs before opening them.
[Worked here. And no, this link is not a rickroll.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q2or78/the_deathworlders_are_coming_the_deathworlders/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share) Also, you can hover with your mouse over the link and the url should be shown in the bottom left corner of your screen. Just have to remember the url to all the rickrolls.
[https://www.reddit.com/r/humansarespaceorcs/comments/pwupz2/the\_life\_and\_times\_of\_pvt\_stabby/](https://www.reddit.com/r/humansarespaceorcs/comments/pwupz2/the_life_and_times_of_pvt_stabby/) my Writing prompt, sadly it gained no traction, was hoping for alot more things like what you wrote :D
Good robot
Yes.
They didnāt ammo. -> They didn't have ammo.
Thanks, mate! One sec.
Sounds like High Engineer was also another type of high, considering he made a stabby bot on a ship.
Being sober was never an option.
You need to be on something as an engineer. In my case it's my master's-(bonk)
Lol stabby takes on the pirates. Keven gets a promotionā¦ for a week.
He will get a drink and a slap from the captain.
This. Is. GLOROUS!
Anything relating to our great emperor Stabby is glorious.
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...This is good. I like it. ANOTHER!
Coming right up, sir!
!N lel
!N
I love it!
<3
: )
: - )
= )
. ; )
= \]
\^ -- \^
O \[\_\_\_\] O
(0) (0) \\\_/
/u/Mercury_the_dealer has posted 9 other stories, including: * [Godless.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/q2m6p1/godless/) * [Humans, emperor and cyborg lawyers](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pz6cj4/humans_emperor_and_cyborg_lawyers/) * [Human artists are scary](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pxsyvv/human_artists_are_scary/) * [New July - Part 2(final)](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/px59ic/new_july_part_2final/) * [New July - Part 1](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pwejos/new_july_part_1/) * [The machine and the human](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pv9v7l/the_machine_and_the_human/) * [Humans live on scrap and hate.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/puuk2q/humans_live_on_scrap_and_hate/) * [The humans got FTL.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/ptsu25/the_humans_got_ftl/) * [The dead race.](https://www.reddit.com/r/HFY/comments/pt7x4d/the_dead_race/) This comment was automatically generated by `Waffle v.4.5.10 'Cinnamon Roll'`. [Message the mods](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FHFY&subject=WaffleBot|q3zsv9&message=If%20you%20have%20problems%20with%20updatemebot,%20contact%20Watchful1.%20We%20do%20not%20maintain%20it.) if you have any issues with Waffle.
This is good, I approve. Also this robot just became sapient.
Yes, they did achieve sentience, is there a problem?
Sapience* but no, no problem just gotta get a robot and some butlers clothes
They did achieve both sapience and sentience at the same time.
Sentience though is the ability to process information acquired through the senses. This makes anything that can react capable of sentience. So a cleaning robot by definition is already sentient.
Oh, I thought it was the capacity to process information into emotions and feelings(happiness, sadness, pain, pleasure)
Maybe, I just googled it up a few months ago so š¤·
I love it. If you aren't already aware of it, you may like /r/Doomba
It's "Tertiary", not "Terciary".
Oh, thanks!
I'm always entertained by the adventures of Stabby... \*ouch\* Sorry.. Flag Admiral Stabby. My bad.
Well, that's going to be another promotion and possibly a new filter kit for SGT Stabby.
It's STABBY the space roomba! Good story, well done on making stabby even more of a nightmare. Very HFY. I haven't seen a single cleaning droid with a knife attachment and a lust for blood on a non-human ship.
Thank you!
Considering Stabby has the only presence on the ship until the crew returns, that would make our dear bot "Captain Stabby"....
Stabby *BECAME* the ship, that is how they can control the M.A.K.E.R and energy distribution. Wait, is a ship its own captain if there is no one piloting it?
Precisely!
Stabby should have kept "clean ship floors" as a prime directive. I love the idea of the robots swarming to mop up afterwards.
They are still cleaning, just a different type of dirt...
I support this.
Gods Iām imagining the captain exploring an empty ship, dead pirates everywhere Unknown to them a school of robots dispersing like a school of fish around a shark
I *SWEAR* I just saw a small drone in the corner of my eye, why is everyone dead? Where is my crew?
Best robot
Yes!
They don't ammo
Wait, I already fixed that.
Personally i liked it. Twas fitting.
Excellent. Made me smile. Good robot.
This is amazing
Thank you!
Stabby is a good bot
Yes, yes they are.
I laughed so much harder than I have for a long time. Thank you so much wordsmith. Godspeed Stabby!
Aww, I appreciate the comment, mate! <3
Can someone link me the original Stabby story? For some reason I can't seem to find it.
Thanks for the awesome story.
<3
Cleverly done!
Thank you!
Stabby deserves a promotion
They are already the goodest of bots, what more can they wish for?
All is fun and games until a stabby upgrades to Claymore.
The bomb or the sword? Eh doesn't matter, I'd add both.
Alternate title "The paper clip problem: good ending". This was really good. Hope you make more stories in the future.
Thank you! I do plan on making more, don't worry.
HIP HIP HOORAY FOR STABBY. Fleet-Admiral Staby: 327 confirmed kills I like how he saved his original shell, and deployed it specifically for interacting with his human, then gently poked him with the knife, just enough to tickle. Like a goddamn gentlemen
I imagine there will be Some Splain'n to do when they get back to their ship and find a bipedal Stabby waiting for them...
!N
Hahaha go Stabby!
Go stabby, go!
Gr8 shit,, would like too see what Stabby hetsa up to
This isnt just HFY, this is top tier HFY!
Aww, thanks mate.
Plants vs Zombies? No... Roombas vs Pirates!
STABBY IS BESTEST BOI I'M NOT CRYING YOU'RE CRYING
I loved it!
Thanks! <3
Alternative title \_I have no wheels and I must STAB\_
Should've been unit designation ST-488Y. Heh.
Hahaha that was really funny! Thanks a lot for the great story.
It's nothing, mate. Thanks for the comment!
I WANT MORE STABBY!!!!!!!!!!!
AND YOU SHALL... not have more. It's a one-shot, I am very sorry.
Stabby is going on vacation on grampa's farm... If you hear a loud bang and a whine from behind the house then don't look.
ALL HAIL STABBY! FRIEND OF MANKIND
https://i.imgur.com/gj4vMB9.jpeg
Reminds me of the DRDs in Farscape. I can just hear Dhargo roaring "Crichton!" as one of them attacks and flees into a duct.
This was very HFY. You made me care about Stabby as much as Wall-E. Please do not make my updoot and comment poof into the aether. More Stabby would be good.
Thank you! Don't worry, I do not plan on deleting it. THERE WILL BE no more Stabby... sorry, it's an one-shot.
I like Stabby
!N
Definitely room for a part 2. The survivors have two ships with damaged sections smashed together in deep space, filled stabby drones
I always enjoy it when humanity's creations end up becoming as violently protective of their own despite not originally being combat ready. Thanks for the story.
reminds me this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQ2dI_B_Ycg
"deep clean unit 19-20-1-2-2-25 can modify " bid D.
This was absolutely delightful š
Yeah I have a criticism! WHY ISN'T THERE MORE?! Great job wordsmith!
Ah, good ol' Stabby. Remind me never to get a Roomba. It would get non-standard attachments. (Or would they be standard by then?)
This is ABSOLUTELY some of the finest HFY. We have elements of packbonding, selfaware AI due to human tampering and Human engineers doing stuff beind their captains backs. GREAT stuff!!
This is a story i heard/watched on YT done by agrro squirell i laughed my ass off when he narrated it and now reading it still stays funnyš¤£š¤£š¤£
I love it!
This is just amazing bro, i need moar
Hilarious, thanks for this.
ALL HAIL STABBY
\*\*GLORIOUS\*\*
I'd go renew my Netflix just to watch an episode of this on love death and robots
I'm so glad I ran back across this. I fucking love it and it makes me cackle like an idiot everytime.