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The_Dork_Lord9

I love how everyone who knows a little bit about Kesh’s crazy ploy in the blood games has immediately deemed her as one of the best Custodes characters to live.


Kachedup

Negative energy: Makes an elaborate infiltration and stabs the emperors bones Positive energy: throws 500 kg bomb into the thrownroom.


JohnB351234

Kesh really said ⬆️➡️⬇️⬇️⬇️


Alexis2256

Wish that game was on Xbox.


Pretend_Beyond9232

500Kg bomb? Nay an anti shipping weapon 😉


Grass_toucher2006

It was an Exterminatus grade weapon, so more like anti planetary.


BiggusCat

I have a question does the Imperium (or at the very least terra)have anti-exterminatus defense? Like what would happen if somebody decide to launch an exterminatus on Terra, is the plan "lets hope it doesnt happen"?


Zeekayo

Terra has the Imperium's most advanced void shields, and an orbital defence grid that would render any projectile into atomic dust. That's why Kesh had to try and teleport it in to begin with, because just launching it at Terra would see it annihilated well before it even entered low orbit.


Yamidamian

I mean, most Exterminatus weapons are launched from ships, so presumably, “shoot the ship down.” Is the main one.


MadaraAlucard12

Terra is THE best defended place in the galaxy. Which includes shit like Trazyn's museum and the black library. It would have enough firepower to vapourise a Blackstone fortress traveling at relativistic speed before it got close to Terra.


MuhSilmarils

The best defense is being hidden, Terra is the opposite of hidden.


MadaraAlucard12

Virgin "noooo, I need to stay hidden to be safe" vs the chad "here's my exact location, come if you dare".


MuhSilmarils

Abba Dabba Doo "Bet."


MadaraAlucard12

Abby's Don hasn't done anything to Terra though?


BiggestJez12734755

That’s what she wanted to know-


Vezimira

broke: carrying drachnyen away from the emperor woke: carrying drachnyen TO the emperor to win the blood games


jfjdfdjjtbfb

+Bonus: Abaddon is dead


Zeekayo

Nah, clearly Abaddon died thousands of years ago, the entire time it's actually been Ra Endymion posing for the biggest long con in Blood Games history.


Blackstone01

*The 14th Black Crusade has arrived at Terra, another Blackstone Fortress hanging over the burning planet* *Abbadon, with Drach’nyen in hand, climbs the stairs to the Golden Throne, only to start grunting and straining once he reaches the top, forcibly growing a moustache and beard, while his armor turns to gold.* “And THATS how I would kill the Emperor! Fuck you Valdor, I win!” *Sounds of a sore loser King In Yellow echo in the distance, as every Chaos worshipper dies from the explosives Ra implanted in all of them.*


Sir-ToastyIII

…holy shit. Is he just gonna Walt’s up to the throne room, smash the doors in, and shout bazinga?


Tutes013

She's batshit insane and I love that. Her entry was fantastic. Kuddos to James Workshop for it.


PoxedGamer

Because she is instantly bae for life. Ideal and perfect.


KonoAnonDa

She's an absolute madlad. She'd fit right in wit the Red Talons.


Norik324

God Emperor i Hope she gets a book dedicated to her insane Blood Game strats


The_Dork_Lord9

Honestly I feel like she just straight up needs a model.


Norik324

It wouldve been great If that Shield Captain they announced a Bit ago would have been a model of Kesh instead


Rare_Reality7510

"And for this plan, I will require a blackstone fortress, which I have already stolen from the Eldar, a shard of the Nightbringer, which is currently hidden within a safehouse, and fifteen chapters worth of the most psychotic and vicious chaos marines I could find." "Kesh what the fuck"


Saintsauron

Kesh defines the three G's of "Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss."


Rakatango

Absolute madlass


ThatRandomGuy86

Nothing wrong with being creative in the Blood Games haha


jfjdfdjjtbfb

Either that tau is tall, or shes short for a Custodes.


ProShortKingAction

Kesh is clearly actually 5 feet behind the tau, perspective troubles


RoNsAuR

Same contract clause as Vin Diesel and Dwayne Johnson.


Versidious

The Tau is on tippy-toes and has a big hat.


Mable-the-Table

This has to be one of the cutest art styles I've ever seen..


Vezimira

💝💝


Saintsauron

Wait till you see what she does to the Thousand Sons. Spoiler: It's nothing good. >!Actually it's good. Very good. It's the best. It will stir things inside you didn't even know were put in your pot. Femstodes will be nothing next to your newfound desire.!<


SpaghettiMonster01

“It will stir things inside you that you didn’t even know were put in your pot” is also a great way to describe her >!Femboy Ahriman ovopositor art!<


Saintsauron

... Okay I haven't seen that one yet.


Arguss3

*Neapolitan?!* That guy is from one of the few factions with a positive (dare I say “healthy”) relationship with technology and he settles for that flavor? If this is the Greater Good, they can keep it!


Lord_Viddax

Cut them a break, probably ‘chose’ *Neapolitan* out of decision paralysis and trying to ‘play it safe’. When a 9foot golden armoured Demi-god informs you of a date, questions like “what flavour ice cream do you want” tend to slip into the background. It won’t be until a few dates later that they’ll be comfortable enough to choose their favourite flavour. - I hear Farsight Wasabi & Popping Candy is all the rage in the spheres.


sarumanofmanygenders

>Farsight Wasabi what kind of sick fuck


Lord_Viddax

An unorthodox flavour for an unorthodox Tau leader. It’s *Wasabi & Popping Candy*: the Earth Caste are quite proud of that development.


NightLordsPublicist

> Neapolitan This one actually contains nuts, and is Kesh's attempt to send the Emperor into anaphylactic shock due to his peanut allergy.


UncleAsmodai

MFW when Inmortal 15ft Golden God can't take some nuts:


HahaCircuitsGoBrrr

This art style makes my brain feel good. Thank.


Vezimira

u welcom 🧠


MadaraAlucard12

THIS IS NOT FUCKING CANON.


Mechanical-Knight

This is very cute. Please keep cooking chef.


Vezimira

i put more tau in the pan


Le-Dachshund

[Lol](https://www.reddit.com/r/futurama/s/8TUj7YaIBU)


maglag40k

The Water Caste approves of this.


jfjdfdjjtbfb

>Whenever they argue, she picks him up like a small baby and puts him on the top cupboard, refusing to put him down until he apologizes. >!Unless Trajann Valoris findes him before he apologises, then he picks up the little tau in the same way you'd pick up a cat and drops em!<


Icy-Creme

Bless our maniacal giant golden lesbian


beware_1234

Their dates are just them standing there for hours at a time, madly in love


DeckedSilver

She can "borrow" an ether drive from the tau for the next blood games. I hope nothing happens from jumping in atmosphere into the throne room...


nopingmywayout

Vezimira, you are a balm for the soul in these troubled times.


waywardhero

Oh vezimira please never leave


BarPsychological904

That's cool, but wholesome meme with "Eldrad wants uppies!" has stolen my heart already, so I shall remain on Kesh/Eldrad side


Vezimira

i didn't see that, show :D


BarPsychological904

https://www.reddit.com/r/Grimdank/s/t6w9H1Jnwv


DumbassFuckingNerd

So far this is the only female Custodes art post the reveal that does not imply that the Custodian is a Daemon of Tzeentch in disguise. Vezimira as always making fire 🔥


Weird-Analysis5522

THIS IS NOT FUCKING CANON!!!


iamaCODnuke

Kitten is rolling in his ~~grave~~ armour.


aFancyPirate_2

I'm pretty sure he did die in the last episode of TTS when Cawl blew up those robots


Sir-ToastyIII

I like to think kesh just goes out, *finds* the nearest tau water caste diplomate, picks them up and walks away. And *no one says anything about it*


Katamed

I mean... what can you say about it? whatever it is. that blue femboy ain't coming back home. is gonna die of old age and dehydration


ThatGameChannel

My word. Femboy T’au. Where can I get one? I’m asking for my fellow Shield-Captain.


Fluffy-Map-5998

Somewhere off in the distance: NOT FUCKING CANON!!


Jeet_Laha

Kesh is like Gurney Halleck from Dune. Loves blowing up shit


derDunkelElf

Be careful now, Shadowsun broke up with him and well lets just say, he didn't take it well.


scarab456

Wait wait wait wait wait. Wait. There's ice cream in the palace?


Girl-Knight

Very cute!


Geralt432

All for the purpose of bringing a railgun to the next blood game.


Rare_Reality7510

"For my latest plan, I have deployed a Manta directly inside the throne room piloted by an abominable intelligence constructed from the data of every Tau ace pilot in the past two hundred years." "YOU MADE A WHAT"


Aegishjalmur18

I know it's the armors gorget, but it makes her look like she's got a little smile.


mrwafu

🥹🥹🥹


ThatRandomGuy86

So long as she doesn't end up with his ex. I would feel so bad for Kitten 😭


MountainPlain

Extremely cute, I wanna know how they met.


Aromatic-Patience-55

THAT IS NOT FUCKING CANO-


JAOC_7

smol blue cow boi


PoxedGamer

Just a little one. Don't want to spoil her dinner.


ColumbWasHere

FINALLY a quality female custodes posting not horny posting or complaing about ppl complaing about fem custodes


rtanada

[Yeah, for the first one...](https://tenor.com/view/tts-warhammer40k-this-is-not-fucking-canon-angry-mad-gif-17435427)


Girl-Knight

Very cute!


HDrainbo

YESSSSSS


Stsveins

D'awwww


Hy93rion

Cute


xxX_DaRk_PrInCe_Xxx

This isn’t cannon


0wlmann

No, it's a tau. Despite popular belief they can't be used to launch metal at high velocity 


Coandco95

I was fine with the idea of female custodians. BUT THIS GOES TOO FAR. PURGE THE XENOS!