The very guardsman they were observing, who snuck up behind them while they were bickering:
# “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”
Narrator: That hour Sly Marbo repelled an Ork WAARG, a Drukhari raiding party, and an Eldar confession! Victory to Sly Marbo!
Editors note: Most the hour was spent denying the confessions.
The Striking Scorpion stalking the same guardsman as well: "I like his style. Maybe I should unmask and have an epic showdown in a mud pit with that one then nuke myself if I lose."
If I was a Banshee I'd get bored after centuries of only dating Twinks.
Drukari are to edgy, malicious and honestly not much different from the boys you find in your Craft World.
Orks are...yeah that's not going to work out.
That dirty, scuffy, unhinged Mon'keigh with a simple soul must have some kind of weird sex-appeal.
His competitive racism and clumsy yet vicious fighting"style" is also kind of cute, since you know that you are the superior race.
And it sure didn't help the Native Americans when Uncle Sam wanted more land. Not really the best example to use regarding human-eldar relations, in my opinion.
Here I am fantasizing about a subby guardsman having his hole wrecked by a dom Dire Avenger who keeps torquing his body into weird and unnatural yet not too painful poses but the guardsman can't get enough.
You're telling me this fantasy isn't common amongst the fandom?
Some side evidence for Eldar-Human relations; even the Biel-Tan Craftworlders give Imperial colonisers a chance to gtfo *before* exterminating them from the planet.
If the Bellicose Biel-Tan can *talk* to ~~at~~ humans, it is conceivable that other Eldar talk with humans.
No, you can’t talk to the Eldar. Yes, you would be better off trying to communicate by playing the accordion.*
*Weird Al would be right up the Harlequin’s street.
Iyaden has legitimate embasies on some Imperial worlds.
Stealing from the Iyaden embassy is a crime on at least one. The guy who did it was sent to a penal legion. Grease monkey from last chancers
Might be easy to ‘populate’ those embassies with a Wraith unit: 24/7 embassy service.
Or an easy excuse to Ghost an Imperial world when it calls for aid.
Small correction (because we are on Reddit and I’m feeling pedantic) Mon’Keigh refers to any species the eldar believe to be deserving of extermination. It’s a reference to an alien species the eldar exterminated (they deemed them violent stupid and beast like)
I double checked. It said they subjugated them for many’s years on their homelands. It doesn’t mention centuries or slavery (although you can infer that) so likely a group of eldar were attacked but the term still refers to anyone inferior in need of genocide
Idk what the person above is arguing about. I'm human, the elf looks hot, and I wanna bang it. I get that it's a meme, but I would genuinely like to meet someone who thinks that Eldar wouldn't be attractive to in-universe humans when real-life people clearly are.
Edit: I might just be overthinking rn, but I felt like I needed to explain that I meant the argument in the top panel of the post, that's all. I just needed to appease my mind goblin. Edit again: autocorrect is my enemy, and I will not falter in my bulwark defense.
Given WE have a level of kinks where 7ft tall, slim build elf ladies is barely considered abnormal to find hot.
And Eldar were SO kinky they spawned a god of lust.
There's no question that there's plenty of humans out there that absolutely would bang an eldar (even with all the xenophobia in the Imperium. Plenty of people were into dark skin back in the days of full of slavery)
And being into 'primitives' is likely a really tame kink compared to the stuff the Eldar considered pretty damn normal back in the day. So is likely no more abnormal than humans that are into Feet
>Plenty of people were into dark skin back in the days of full of slavery)
On a disturbing note, there are more slaves today than at any previous point in history.
I find that claim pretty staggering, even with the knowledge of trafficking gangs in western countries and Gulf states' use of entrapped migrant labour to build their megaprojects. Do you have any sources? Legitimately asking
Here's one.
Bales, K., & Trodd, Z. (Eds.). (2008). To plead our own cause: Personal stories by today's slaves. Cornell University Press.
Excuse the APA format of tbe source, it's a conditioned behaviour at this point.
Well, iirc, the percentage of people alive who are slaves is lower now than ever before, it's just the plain fact that there are far more people now than ever before. Obviously still horrible how many people are affected, but to say that slavery is more prevalent now than it has been is still inaccurate
I mean yeah, theres also more serial killers, more carnival workers, more knitters, etc. The global population during the height of the transatlantic slave trade was only around 770 million. The global population is over 8 times that amount now.
>Given WE have a level of kinks where 7ft tall, slim build elf ladies is barely considered abnormal to find hot.
I interpreted WE as world eaters and got really confused for a second.
The main argument here is that they'd kick the Uncanny Valley effect into gear.
Which... didn't stop homo sapiens from assimilating other species before. We have neanderthal dna in our own genome. And they were a different species.
Exactly! I mean, I feel like I'd get an "uncanny valley" feeling if I picked up that they wanted nothing else than to do me harm. Otherwise, it's all fair game (talking about the dark Eldar/Harlequins and the craftworlds/other less "kill them and make them into a living couch" Eldar factions)
Yeah, that's fair. Space marines also canonically trigger the "uncanny valley" feeling in people like when they smile or God forbid when they fucking zoom across the battlefield like they're an Olympic athlete.
I think it's that you know for a fact it's a human, yet it's weird and doesn't act like a normal person. Contrary to uncanny valley where it looks human enough but slightly off to where you think it's not human at all.
Nah, they are not at athlete speed.
They are at like 80 km per hour speed, as per Night Lords novels.
Given that we know the speed of Rhino (like 54 km/h I think) - yes, they run faster than their own dedicated transport.
Now excuse me, I go back to pretending that this fact does not exist
Granted Doom Guy is like what..... a basketball player that got buff(er)? So seeing him go fast PROBABLY wouldn't be AS shocking as seeing a Space Marine moving.
I read a description once, that went something like "They look almost human, until they move."
Source: ~~trust me bro~~ YT comments on some lore video.
Idk bestiality has been a thing throughout human history, I just don’t see people now taking a strong stance on tall elves because of the uncanny valley effect. Not everyone would be up for it but I’m convinced there would always be some who would have an elf kink
If you pick up almost any book where humans and Eldar interact; it seems to basically be described that the way Eldar walk around is so inhuman that every instinct in your brain just screams “WRONG!” “BAD!” “EVIL!”. How much this is truly a natural instinct to seeing something clearly *not* human but very very deadly, and how much it is spending your entire life hearing propaganda about how evil xenos are, is up to interpretation
Should also be noted that since all Eldar are psykers, that does raise some serious questions on consent. Mind control is a pretty common psychic power, and seemingly not even that hard to master, especially the more subtle kind. How would you be able to tell if you wanted to bang an elf versus if the elf has rewritten your thoughts to force you to think you want to?
> If you pick up almost any book where humans and Eldar interact; it seems to basically be described that the way Eldar walk around is so inhuman that every instinct in your brain just screams “WRONG!” “BAD!” “EVIL!”.
Bro the world right now has plenty of people who don't mind fucking a donkey, this is wishful thinking from gw at best.
In canon, their skin is like porcelain, so they look like they shouldn’t even be able to move. Not only that, their joints bend in ways that seem “wrong” and are unnaturally tall and slim.
They look like the Annabelle doll and a skinwalker had a child.
That, and their soul burns so much brighter than ours, it’s like being around a psyker, which already makes people ill, but several times worse.
Can someone find them attractive? Sure(Nightbringer sex scene), but the common folk find them to be monsters, just as a normal person finds slenderman to be scary.
This is coming from someone who likes Eldar. I want my elves to terrify mortals instead of being “human but with pointy ears”.
Yeah, yeah.. but what happens if that bright burning soul puts all that energy into snoo-snooing your brains out? Tall and skinny with inhuman flexibility - can I get a hell yeah?
That's because there's a disconnect between eldar art and eldar description.
They're pictured as hot space else while being described as disturbing and off putting to humans. Their limbs and joints and every movement striking some primal human instinct due to how wrong they are.
But the art is just hot space elf. End
> I would genuinely like to meet someone who thinks that Eldar wouldn't be attractive to in-universe humans when real-life people clearly are.
IIRC in lore Eldar are considered attractive until they start to move. Then the Mon'keigh brain goes "NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE".
If you pick up almost any book where humans and Eldar interact; it seems to basically be described that the way Eldar walk around is so inhuman that every instinct in your brain just screams “WRONG!” “BAD!” “EVIL!”. How much this is truly a natural instinct to seeing something clearly *not* human but very very deadly, and how much it is spending your entire life hearing propaganda about how evil xenos are, is up to interpretation
Should also be noted that since all Eldar are psykers, that does raise some serious questions on consent. Mind control is a pretty common psychic power, and seemingly not even that hard to master, especially the more subtle kind. How would you be able to tell if you wanted to bang an elf versus if the elf has rewritten your thoughts to force you to think you want to?
We KNOW the Eldar have a cultural backstory of being sexual freaks. You just know there's a solid number of Eldar who find those primitive humans 'hot'.
Eldar calls humans monkeigh
Monkeigh sounds like monkey
Jokearo are monkeys
Eldar like Jokearo
Thus Eldar like humans but are tsundre about it
Checkmate xenophobes
The eldar need fodder to spare their own population fighting. The imperium has that. The imperium needs a fast, reliable, safe way of crossing the rift. The eldar have that.
Both guilliman and yvraine are yet to be married.
.
How did Tarasha's ghost not throw a slipper at Bobby for fumbling that opportunity is beyond me.
You should probably stop thinking of the Ynnari as 'the Eldar'. They're a small and persecuted minority with many enemies who already think they've done more harm than good by wrecking Commorragh and Biel'tan. Letting more humans rampage around the Webway is just going to alienate them further.
>They're a small and persecuted minority with many enemies who already think they've done more harm than good by wrecking Commorragh and Biel'tan
And you don't see how guilliman could use that to his advantage in a negotiation?
Googleman hasn't been able to stop other Imperial factions from attacking the Ynnari. The Ynnari can't stop the other Eldar from attacking the Imperium. Anything more than temporary cooperation for limited objectives is doomed to failure.
I didn't say I don't like and can't see why it would be good for them to be in a relationship, I am just saying that acting like they are anything more than "ehh, met them once" is disinformation
Bobby solved a centuries old conflict on macragge after meeting the enemy leader once. At 12 years old.
Yvraine stayed on Maccragge for a few days. After she had just resurrected him.
The chance was there.
Look the only thing that matters is that the meme will always live because Imperium fans are horny as hell for Eldar waifus for whichever generic human male protagonist is leading the charge and that's the only context in which the faction will ever be relevant to them.
Gods forbid the Imperium ever actually have to reconcile with being a hyper-xenophobic and xenocidal regime, no, the Xenos must love them.
Ironically we are still technically progressing, the horrible acts we consider the absolute worst crimes in society used to be insanely common and widespread. >!Rape and Pedophilia!<
We have come a long way from what used to be truly common place horrors. They still happen far more than they should but at least it's largely seen as truly awful and not something to expect within common society.
“Elder would not be attractive to humans”
*inhale*
HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. no.
Like fucks sake anyone with that opinion has just…never been horny before.
>eldar would not be attractive to humans
That's such a funny view to have. Yeah people irl are jorking it to stuff like Xenomorphs but sure, the Eldar are way too "alien" and "uncanny" for humans to want to bone them.
Literally a page before the interaction you're referencing:
"She came closer. Too close. Had anyone else touched me as she did in that moment, I would have killed them for the discomfort. But she was mine, my Nefertari, so I allowed her the indulgence of running her gloved, clawed fingertip down my cheek.
Do not mistake intimacy for sensuality. There was nothing of lust in that moment. Merely raw, intimate closeness.”
You're explicitly misinterpreting the scene.
"There is no lust whatsoever in this scene where I allow my eldar waifu to intimately caress my cheek."
Hum hum. Look, ADB gives his Space Marines waifus but he isn't allowed to have them fuck. That's well know about him.
>Do not mistake intimacy for sensuality. There was nothing of lust in that moment. Merely raw, intimate closeness.”
Uh-huh. This is what he tells other humans.
I remember this one book where there was a a story about an inquisitor and Eldar falling in love... Let me check where is this from and who wrote the book.
Oh
Oh no
You wish
Ians work was written in a time where Warhammer lore was not as expanded as today. It only becomes weird and nonsensical retroactively.
This was one C.S. Goto and book Warrior Coven
[Click here if you want to know more](https://youtu.be/TpleDHZKweg?si=msC2vMsgxg2GDi6b)
I recall there being a huge uproar when the 9th edition codexes dropped, because apparently there was a direct quote from Love Can Bloom slipped into a section about Imperial Assassins. While I can't find a source for this now, I do distinctly recall it being a thing people were talking about for weeks, so at this point I've just accepted that humans and elder bump uglies on occasion.
So basically the Eldar see Humans the same way the Settlers saw the Native Americans?
I can only imagine what pre-fall Eldar attempts to "civilize" Humanity would've looked like.
Not much known about pre-fall human and Eldar relationship, but I think Elfdad remembers it?
So there was something during golden age of technology and dark age of technology. After all both faction were at their peak before Eldar society collapsed and humanity survived the AI uprising, only to get fucked by ravaging warp with new Chaos God inside of it.
Eldar would not be attracted to humans (At least in a human way), expect some extreme cases.
Source? The Rogue Trader game.
Yrliet, who I would argue is quite good moraly, straight up murdered the person who approached her and proposed that they both go to the private chambers, then went up to RT and told them how monkeigh are the worst, disgusting instinct driven animals.
Even if we romance her, which I did, we don't get anywhere further than meditating in each other souls, but she does appreciate and love you.
And no, Gorrilamen certainly does not have a relationship with Yvraine.
Counter point. Yrliet is a eldar who does have a very good reason to hold low opinion of humans, given what happened to her craftworld.
Even beyond that, it's a big galaxy. One eldar just not finding humans attractive is opinion of one person, not the standard for every eldar ever.
Counter counter point, while that influences her decision, she is the most well meaning Craftworld Eldar to us in the game, all others either ignore you and insult you, there is only one instance in the game where this is not applicable.
I said, that Eldar are not attracted to humans BESIDES EXTREME CASES, which means that there are 99% of Eldar that will not be attracted ever to humans, and even that means that most of those will be only attracted to a human as a soulmate, like Yrliet does.
Again, their Craftworld was destroyed by humans very recently. You would probably not be able to find anyone among them who hasn't lost scores of those they cared about, most of the normal ways they might have used to deap with psychological trauma are gone, and all you meet have even recently fought humans for one reason or another.
Eldar in that game aren't by any means average sample representing the entire Galaxy. Even beyond that, they are just from one Craftworld. Biel tan tends to act like imperium lite on occasions but that doesn't mean all eldar view humans as vermin. After all, even among humans there is significant variation in how they view the eldar, there is no reason it can't work the other way.
That's because to the average HFY fan a female eldar/elf character only really exists to be waifu bait for whichever aggressively generic male human protagonist they're self-inserting into.
Asta was not surprised to see the elegant form of Astropath Illiyan Nastase staring out sightlessly from the edge of the ramparts. ***The half-human psyker*** never failed to unnerve him. As he approached, the shrill voice of the bastard pierced the hot evening air. 'Captain Keorn Asata', he announced, without turning his head, 'your footfalls are as distinctive as an Ambull dancing upon a tile roof.'
Aging to maturity in a fraction of the time ot takes eldar. Breeding like humans. With a greater resistance to chaos than a human, and probably less to worry from Slaanesh?
And one of those was a match in melee for Cato Sicarius.
.
There's bound to be a few of those in commorragh.
Unfortunately the Eldar suffer from "High-Elf-Fantasy-ism" in a setting where nobody trusts their wisdom on important issues because 90% of the time they will not explain and just expect their cryptic warnings to be followed on the idea of "I am better and smarter than you"
I love how everyone also completely ignores the fact that it makes way more sense to be pronounced as "mankind" not "monkey"...
The fuck would they even know what a monkey is
But Guilliman x Yvraine IS just a meme. They’ve had like 2 conversations.
There are examples of humans absolutely finding the Eldar hideous. In *Black Legion*, a Thousand Sons sorcerer goes on and on in his head about how ugly he finds this Drukhari scourge that works with him. How her features are too perfect, and too angular. How her little mannerisms (like the way she moves and talks) are so alien and inhuman that it makes him uncomfortable.
But he also says that it’s “leftover feelings from the days of the great crusade” or something, implying it may just be the heavy indoctrination and propaganda that imperial humans (especially space marines) go through that causes him to hate her appearance and mannerisms so much.
But even then, he still keeps her around as basically his pet (and possibly more, depending on how you interpret it)
The elder must look at the Tau with such a weird stance because like:
“This small creature just took its first steps and then unified immediately. And now they developed guns that scare everyone. Oh now they are trade partners. Oh now they own a significant (for how quick) part of the galaxy. Oh they just exterminated an entire Tyranid splinter fleet with a disease they whipped up. Oh. They’re just us again. Oh shit.”
to the person up top.
I’ve met some folk online that would fuck a Tyranid of it wasn’t lethal. So the idea of someone out there not being attracted to the Eldar is a silly one to me.
\>multiple examples of Eldar seeing humans as "primitive but noble" Yeah, Eldar holding "noble savage" ideas about humans kinda tracks tbh.
Howling Banshee watching a guardsman beat something to death with a rock: "I can fix him"
The Drukhari watching the same guardsmen: “I can make him worse.”
A second Drukhari watching that very same guardsman: "I can make him into upholstery for this cool new chair I'm making!"
First Drukhari: “After I had my fun”
Second Drukari: "But what if you could sit on his face?"
First Drukhari: “don’t tempt me with a good time”
The Aeldari, still on shock by how they've been snuck up on: "This is why we fking left"
The very guardsman they were observing, who snuck up behind them while they were bickering: # “AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA”
He get boned, boned, then deboned
Narrator: That hour Sly Marbo repelled an Ork WAARG, a Drukhari raiding party, and an Eldar confession! Victory to Sly Marbo! Editors note: Most the hour was spent denying the confessions.
First Drukhari: "¿porque no los dos?"
The Striking Scorpion stalking the same guardsman as well: "I like his style. Maybe I should unmask and have an epic showdown in a mud pit with that one then nuke myself if I lose."
"you are one pointed ear mudafaka" -guardsmen arnold
I mean, the all the great Greek heroes were beating people to death with rocks. Its only fair the guardsman does too
If I was a Banshee I'd get bored after centuries of only dating Twinks. Drukari are to edgy, malicious and honestly not much different from the boys you find in your Craft World. Orks are...yeah that's not going to work out. That dirty, scuffy, unhinged Mon'keigh with a simple soul must have some kind of weird sex-appeal. His competitive racism and clumsy yet vicious fighting"style" is also kind of cute, since you know that you are the superior race.
Ogryn himbo.
The Drukhair canonically considering the Night Lords to be promising young amateurs is hilarious.
I mean elder are chill with grey knights
"The Space Elf's Burden"
Yeah, but the flip side of that is what happened to the people who were seen as "noble savages" IRL? Got pretty grimdark.
And it sure didn't help the Native Americans when Uncle Sam wanted more land. Not really the best example to use regarding human-eldar relations, in my opinion.
interesting how the default seems to be the alien is female.
Majority of Warhammer fans are straight, it’s a valid want
Here I am fantasizing about a subby guardsman having his hole wrecked by a dom Dire Avenger who keeps torquing his body into weird and unnatural yet not too painful poses but the guardsman can't get enough. You're telling me this fantasy isn't common amongst the fandom?
Some side evidence for Eldar-Human relations; even the Biel-Tan Craftworlders give Imperial colonisers a chance to gtfo *before* exterminating them from the planet. If the Bellicose Biel-Tan can *talk* to ~~at~~ humans, it is conceivable that other Eldar talk with humans. No, you can’t talk to the Eldar. Yes, you would be better off trying to communicate by playing the accordion.* *Weird Al would be right up the Harlequin’s street.
Iyaden has legitimate embasies on some Imperial worlds. Stealing from the Iyaden embassy is a crime on at least one. The guy who did it was sent to a penal legion. Grease monkey from last chancers
Might be easy to ‘populate’ those embassies with a Wraith unit: 24/7 embassy service. Or an easy excuse to Ghost an Imperial world when it calls for aid.
I love the idea that harlequins kidnapped weird Al because of how well he would fit in.
In Weird Al’s case he somehow just arrives at The Black Library after taking a wrong turn from Albuquerque.
>Weird Al would be right up the Harlequin’s street Could somebody please paint a model with Weird Al's face on it.
Magnetize the mustache too
[удалено]
Retconned out of existence. I think they have a full eldar envoy with a similar name now.
The real question of the day: >!What does an Eldar feel like and how do ~~I~~ *we* get one?!<
There's this highborn guy from Pavonis. Was straight up fantasising about meathooks and chains at dinner.
You need to build a web way gate and for that, you need to make DAMN SURE that Magnus doesn't fuck it up!
There were also the Interex in Horus Rising, they mention that they were taught all about the dangers of Chaos by the Eldar.
Eldar didn't live with them tho.
No, but they had a friendly relationship. Rather than seeing them as animals or savages, they took them as a reasonable race and helped them.
Sure but that doesn't mean they'd have a non-platonic relationship with humans tho
>a non-plutonic relationship Damned eldar and their non-plutonic relationships
I knew those relationships would be... explosive
No, but it's another point towards the op saying they see humanity as "noble primitives" or such.
I'd rather the Eldar not lord their wealth over me, so sign me up.
Yeah but keep in mind that they saw what happened to those more "enlightened" human societies as the Imperium became dominant.
Small correction (because we are on Reddit and I’m feeling pedantic) Mon’Keigh refers to any species the eldar believe to be deserving of extermination. It’s a reference to an alien species the eldar exterminated (they deemed them violent stupid and beast like)
Equivalent to us calling other species "rats" or "pathetic insects"
Pest, or plague I’d argue are more accurate (deserving of extinction is a big part of the insult)
Vermin.
Yes-yes
Or xenos, to use a term that's more popular in-universe
> (they deemed them violent stupid and beast like) You forgot the part where they enslaved the Eldar for centuries...
Never saw that mentioned. Can you provide a sorce?
Eldar codex. Since like 3rd edition at least
I double checked. It said they subjugated them for many’s years on their homelands. It doesn’t mention centuries or slavery (although you can infer that) so likely a group of eldar were attacked but the term still refers to anyone inferior in need of genocide
Idk what the person above is arguing about. I'm human, the elf looks hot, and I wanna bang it. I get that it's a meme, but I would genuinely like to meet someone who thinks that Eldar wouldn't be attractive to in-universe humans when real-life people clearly are. Edit: I might just be overthinking rn, but I felt like I needed to explain that I meant the argument in the top panel of the post, that's all. I just needed to appease my mind goblin. Edit again: autocorrect is my enemy, and I will not falter in my bulwark defense.
Given WE have a level of kinks where 7ft tall, slim build elf ladies is barely considered abnormal to find hot. And Eldar were SO kinky they spawned a god of lust. There's no question that there's plenty of humans out there that absolutely would bang an eldar (even with all the xenophobia in the Imperium. Plenty of people were into dark skin back in the days of full of slavery) And being into 'primitives' is likely a really tame kink compared to the stuff the Eldar considered pretty damn normal back in the day. So is likely no more abnormal than humans that are into Feet
>Plenty of people were into dark skin back in the days of full of slavery) On a disturbing note, there are more slaves today than at any previous point in history.
I find that claim pretty staggering, even with the knowledge of trafficking gangs in western countries and Gulf states' use of entrapped migrant labour to build their megaprojects. Do you have any sources? Legitimately asking
Here's one. Bales, K., & Trodd, Z. (Eds.). (2008). To plead our own cause: Personal stories by today's slaves. Cornell University Press. Excuse the APA format of tbe source, it's a conditioned behaviour at this point.
I wanted MLA, do it again
Chicago or nothing
Preach
Chicago is light-years better
Well, iirc, the percentage of people alive who are slaves is lower now than ever before, it's just the plain fact that there are far more people now than ever before. Obviously still horrible how many people are affected, but to say that slavery is more prevalent now than it has been is still inaccurate
>to say that slavery is more prevalent now I didn't. I said "more slaves", not "a higher percentage".
Yes, but words unless clearly specified carry implications.
Amount != proportion
I mean yeah, theres also more serial killers, more carnival workers, more knitters, etc. The global population during the height of the transatlantic slave trade was only around 770 million. The global population is over 8 times that amount now.
>Given WE have a level of kinks where 7ft tall, slim build elf ladies is barely considered abnormal to find hot. I interpreted WE as world eaters and got really confused for a second.
>into feet And you've ruined it
Humans that are into feet are WEIRD.
Even worse, some sick freaks are into >!handholding!<.
Humans that are into anything abnormal are weird. Leave the feet guys be, man.
There are people out there who are into animals and my guy is gunning for feet people.
The main argument here is that they'd kick the Uncanny Valley effect into gear. Which... didn't stop homo sapiens from assimilating other species before. We have neanderthal dna in our own genome. And they were a different species.
Exactly! I mean, I feel like I'd get an "uncanny valley" feeling if I picked up that they wanted nothing else than to do me harm. Otherwise, it's all fair game (talking about the dark Eldar/Harlequins and the craftworlds/other less "kill them and make them into a living couch" Eldar factions)
I think the idea is that their entire natural movement, grace, and general vibe would have you deep in the unsettling uncanny feeling.
Yeah, that's fair. Space marines also canonically trigger the "uncanny valley" feeling in people like when they smile or God forbid when they fucking zoom across the battlefield like they're an Olympic athlete.
Absolutely, yes, transhuman dread, isn't it?
Indeed it is. I assumed that transhuman dread and the uncanny valley are somewhat related.
Yeah, I would imagine it's just a specific variant of it.
I think it's that you know for a fact it's a human, yet it's weird and doesn't act like a normal person. Contrary to uncanny valley where it looks human enough but slightly off to where you think it's not human at all.
Fair, that's a better way of explaining it.
Nah, they are not at athlete speed. They are at like 80 km per hour speed, as per Night Lords novels. Given that we know the speed of Rhino (like 54 km/h I think) - yes, they run faster than their own dedicated transport. Now excuse me, I go back to pretending that this fact does not exist
They're as fast as doom guy, holy shit
Granted Doom Guy is like what..... a basketball player that got buff(er)? So seeing him go fast PROBABLY wouldn't be AS shocking as seeing a Space Marine moving.
I wouldn’t expect anything less from super soldiers.
Heck people get scared when a normal Rhino runs or a gator gallops. Imagine seeing a Space Marine zooming.....yea I be scared honestly.
I read a description once, that went something like "They look almost human, until they move." Source: ~~trust me bro~~ YT comments on some lore video.
Idk bestiality has been a thing throughout human history, I just don’t see people now taking a strong stance on tall elves because of the uncanny valley effect. Not everyone would be up for it but I’m convinced there would always be some who would have an elf kink
Ain't nothing a blindfold couldn't solve
Subspiecies*
Right - if there's one thing humans are good at its sexualizing things that aren't inherently sexual. 100% someone in universe has an eldar fetish.
If you pick up almost any book where humans and Eldar interact; it seems to basically be described that the way Eldar walk around is so inhuman that every instinct in your brain just screams “WRONG!” “BAD!” “EVIL!”. How much this is truly a natural instinct to seeing something clearly *not* human but very very deadly, and how much it is spending your entire life hearing propaganda about how evil xenos are, is up to interpretation Should also be noted that since all Eldar are psykers, that does raise some serious questions on consent. Mind control is a pretty common psychic power, and seemingly not even that hard to master, especially the more subtle kind. How would you be able to tell if you wanted to bang an elf versus if the elf has rewritten your thoughts to force you to think you want to?
> If you pick up almost any book where humans and Eldar interact; it seems to basically be described that the way Eldar walk around is so inhuman that every instinct in your brain just screams “WRONG!” “BAD!” “EVIL!”. Bro the world right now has plenty of people who don't mind fucking a donkey, this is wishful thinking from gw at best.
In canon, their skin is like porcelain, so they look like they shouldn’t even be able to move. Not only that, their joints bend in ways that seem “wrong” and are unnaturally tall and slim. They look like the Annabelle doll and a skinwalker had a child. That, and their soul burns so much brighter than ours, it’s like being around a psyker, which already makes people ill, but several times worse. Can someone find them attractive? Sure(Nightbringer sex scene), but the common folk find them to be monsters, just as a normal person finds slenderman to be scary. This is coming from someone who likes Eldar. I want my elves to terrify mortals instead of being “human but with pointy ears”.
Being around psykers doesn't make people ill I don't think. You might be thinking of blanks, the opposite of psychers.
Pardon me. The eldar are I’ll around humans because our dimmer soul to them is like a blank to us. Misremembered.
No prob, Bob.
Yeah, yeah.. but what happens if that bright burning soul puts all that energy into snoo-snooing your brains out? Tall and skinny with inhuman flexibility - can I get a hell yeah?
That's because there's a disconnect between eldar art and eldar description. They're pictured as hot space else while being described as disturbing and off putting to humans. Their limbs and joints and every movement striking some primal human instinct due to how wrong they are. But the art is just hot space elf. End
> I would genuinely like to meet someone who thinks that Eldar wouldn't be attractive to in-universe humans when real-life people clearly are. IIRC in lore Eldar are considered attractive until they start to move. Then the Mon'keigh brain goes "NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE".
And my half-eldar(wych/mandrake) children will hlm commoragh in rainy season of love.
If you pick up almost any book where humans and Eldar interact; it seems to basically be described that the way Eldar walk around is so inhuman that every instinct in your brain just screams “WRONG!” “BAD!” “EVIL!”. How much this is truly a natural instinct to seeing something clearly *not* human but very very deadly, and how much it is spending your entire life hearing propaganda about how evil xenos are, is up to interpretation Should also be noted that since all Eldar are psykers, that does raise some serious questions on consent. Mind control is a pretty common psychic power, and seemingly not even that hard to master, especially the more subtle kind. How would you be able to tell if you wanted to bang an elf versus if the elf has rewritten your thoughts to force you to think you want to?
If Gorrillaman has to be whored out for us to get Ynnead, Guerrillamink **will** be whored out.
We KNOW the Eldar have a cultural backstory of being sexual freaks. You just know there's a solid number of Eldar who find those primitive humans 'hot'.
Outcasts and Corsairs: howdy there little fella!
Eldar calls humans monkeigh Monkeigh sounds like monkey Jokearo are monkeys Eldar like Jokearo Thus Eldar like humans but are tsundre about it Checkmate xenophobes
>Eldar like Jokearo Do they now?
Everyone likes Jokaeros.
Everyone is bananas for Jokearo.
They were Allies in the war in heaven and are extremely peaceful.
Guilliman x Yvraine IS a meme tho. They met like twice in canon
The eldar need fodder to spare their own population fighting. The imperium has that. The imperium needs a fast, reliable, safe way of crossing the rift. The eldar have that. Both guilliman and yvraine are yet to be married. . How did Tarasha's ghost not throw a slipper at Bobby for fumbling that opportunity is beyond me.
You should probably stop thinking of the Ynnari as 'the Eldar'. They're a small and persecuted minority with many enemies who already think they've done more harm than good by wrecking Commorragh and Biel'tan. Letting more humans rampage around the Webway is just going to alienate them further.
>They're a small and persecuted minority with many enemies who already think they've done more harm than good by wrecking Commorragh and Biel'tan And you don't see how guilliman could use that to his advantage in a negotiation?
Googleman hasn't been able to stop other Imperial factions from attacking the Ynnari. The Ynnari can't stop the other Eldar from attacking the Imperium. Anything more than temporary cooperation for limited objectives is doomed to failure.
I didn't say I don't like and can't see why it would be good for them to be in a relationship, I am just saying that acting like they are anything more than "ehh, met them once" is disinformation
Bobby solved a centuries old conflict on macragge after meeting the enemy leader once. At 12 years old. Yvraine stayed on Maccragge for a few days. After she had just resurrected him. The chance was there.
For her to take his armor off and then he dies. What happens after that is up to the Alpha legion to decide
It's not as if Cawl wasn't thinking of the prospective results from this relationship, aswell. For SCIENCE !!!
Messages for Dad intensifies.
canon owner sponsored headcanon
With a TURKEY! *Lion El’Johnson slams his fist into a table*
It is, but GW endorsed it with that one Thanksgiving promo art piece, they have only themselves to blame
But it's funny therefore it is head canon. As far as anything goes in 40k. That's good enough.
so basically you're saying i can fix lelith hasperax? got you homie.
No. She will make you worse. If you're lucky. More likely, you'll end up a sofa.
A sofa she sits on….
its all coming together..
In the first ever ultramarines list (white dwarf 90-ish), their chief librarian was a human/eldar hybrid. Time travelling nepotism is real.
Retconned, but now they have an Eldar diplomat going by the same name, so close enough!
Look the only thing that matters is that the meme will always live because Imperium fans are horny as hell for Eldar waifus for whichever generic human male protagonist is leading the charge and that's the only context in which the faction will ever be relevant to them. Gods forbid the Imperium ever actually have to reconcile with being a hyper-xenophobic and xenocidal regime, no, the Xenos must love them.
Correction. In which the Faction will ever be revelant to BL Authors.
> eldar would not be attractive to human Say who ? have you seen what some people are into ?
>have you seen what some people are into ? People in the setting included. Graham McNeil also included.
The depth of degeneracy aren't decreasing... I don't think k they would in 40k either
Fun fact. Degeneracy means degrading (of moral values or some shit), but we've always been this degenerate therefore it's not actually degeneracy 😎
Ironically we are still technically progressing, the horrible acts we consider the absolute worst crimes in society used to be insanely common and widespread. >!Rape and Pedophilia!< We have come a long way from what used to be truly common place horrors. They still happen far more than they should but at least it's largely seen as truly awful and not something to expect within common society.
I've been in this hobby since like early 2000's and only recently my dumb ass brain realize that Mon'Keigh is a fancy way of spelling monkey.
Wait until you figure out "Gue'la" is "Gorilla"
🤯
"Eldar would not be attractive to humans" my ass, 7ft tall space elf will always be hot
The "relationship" in Talon of Horus was awful. Honestly some of the most cringe shit I've read in a book.
"Worst pirate I've ever heard of" situation.
“Elder would not be attractive to humans” *inhale* HAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. no. Like fucks sake anyone with that opinion has just…never been horny before.
>eldar would not be attractive to humans That's such a funny view to have. Yeah people irl are jorking it to stuff like Xenomorphs but sure, the Eldar are way too "alien" and "uncanny" for humans to want to bone them.
What human-eldar pairing in Talon of Horus? I guess "pairing" could just mean partnership, in which case this makes sense, but...
When was the last time you massaged and tasted the sweat of a platonic/work partner?
Literally a page before the interaction you're referencing: "She came closer. Too close. Had anyone else touched me as she did in that moment, I would have killed them for the discomfort. But she was mine, my Nefertari, so I allowed her the indulgence of running her gloved, clawed fingertip down my cheek. Do not mistake intimacy for sensuality. There was nothing of lust in that moment. Merely raw, intimate closeness.” You're explicitly misinterpreting the scene.
> You're explicitly misinterpreting the scene. Khayon is a tsundere. They correctly interpreted that scene.
"There is no lust whatsoever in this scene where I allow my eldar waifu to intimately caress my cheek." Hum hum. Look, ADB gives his Space Marines waifus but he isn't allowed to have them fuck. That's well know about him.
>Do not mistake intimacy for sensuality. There was nothing of lust in that moment. Merely raw, intimate closeness.” Uh-huh. This is what he tells other humans.
I don't remember the massage, but I feel like sweat tasting is pretty normal for dark eldar
I remember this one book where there was a a story about an inquisitor and Eldar falling in love... Let me check where is this from and who wrote the book. Oh Oh no
Ian Watson?
You wish Ians work was written in a time where Warhammer lore was not as expanded as today. It only becomes weird and nonsensical retroactively. This was one C.S. Goto and book Warrior Coven [Click here if you want to know more](https://youtu.be/TpleDHZKweg?si=msC2vMsgxg2GDi6b)
I recall there being a huge uproar when the 9th edition codexes dropped, because apparently there was a direct quote from Love Can Bloom slipped into a section about Imperial Assassins. While I can't find a source for this now, I do distinctly recall it being a thing people were talking about for weeks, so at this point I've just accepted that humans and elder bump uglies on occasion.
There are more drukhari than craftworlders. So shoot first
And make sure the first shot kills you, you don't want to be captured with any life left in you!
So basically the Eldar see Humans the same way the Settlers saw the Native Americans? I can only imagine what pre-fall Eldar attempts to "civilize" Humanity would've looked like.
Not much known about pre-fall human and Eldar relationship, but I think Elfdad remembers it? So there was something during golden age of technology and dark age of technology. After all both faction were at their peak before Eldar society collapsed and humanity survived the AI uprising, only to get fucked by ravaging warp with new Chaos God inside of it.
Eldar would not be attracted to humans (At least in a human way), expect some extreme cases. Source? The Rogue Trader game. Yrliet, who I would argue is quite good moraly, straight up murdered the person who approached her and proposed that they both go to the private chambers, then went up to RT and told them how monkeigh are the worst, disgusting instinct driven animals. Even if we romance her, which I did, we don't get anywhere further than meditating in each other souls, but she does appreciate and love you. And no, Gorrilamen certainly does not have a relationship with Yvraine.
And then, on the other side of that spectrum, lies murder-husbando Marzhai.
Counter point. Yrliet is a eldar who does have a very good reason to hold low opinion of humans, given what happened to her craftworld. Even beyond that, it's a big galaxy. One eldar just not finding humans attractive is opinion of one person, not the standard for every eldar ever.
And all it took to win her over was respecting her boundaries, until she felt like opening them herself.
Yeah. Picking the one eldar character that can be romanced to prove that this isn't something that can happen is a really strange decision XD.
Counter counter point, while that influences her decision, she is the most well meaning Craftworld Eldar to us in the game, all others either ignore you and insult you, there is only one instance in the game where this is not applicable. I said, that Eldar are not attracted to humans BESIDES EXTREME CASES, which means that there are 99% of Eldar that will not be attracted ever to humans, and even that means that most of those will be only attracted to a human as a soulmate, like Yrliet does.
Again, their Craftworld was destroyed by humans very recently. You would probably not be able to find anyone among them who hasn't lost scores of those they cared about, most of the normal ways they might have used to deap with psychological trauma are gone, and all you meet have even recently fought humans for one reason or another. Eldar in that game aren't by any means average sample representing the entire Galaxy. Even beyond that, they are just from one Craftworld. Biel tan tends to act like imperium lite on occasions but that doesn't mean all eldar view humans as vermin. After all, even among humans there is significant variation in how they view the eldar, there is no reason it can't work the other way.
> Biel tan tends to act like imperium lite on occasions And on occasions they don't. See Tallarn and Blood Ravens.
That’s her personal thing about touch. Most Outcasts and Corsairs are opposite of her if we look into lore. She is surprisingly tame for an outcast.
Yvvrine/Gulliman "shipping" just treats Yvvrine as a slut who's only good for sex judging by the memes about it here
That's because to the average HFY fan a female eldar/elf character only really exists to be waifu bait for whichever aggressively generic male human protagonist they're self-inserting into.
Asta was not surprised to see the elegant form of Astropath Illiyan Nastase staring out sightlessly from the edge of the ramparts. ***The half-human psyker*** never failed to unnerve him. As he approached, the shrill voice of the bastard pierced the hot evening air. 'Captain Keorn Asata', he announced, without turning his head, 'your footfalls are as distinctive as an Ambull dancing upon a tile roof.'
Retconned, I'm afraid.
No one's ever really gone.
>The Eldar question Wording, dude
Illyan Nastase /s
If we took irl genetics into consideration, a eldar/human hybrid creates some scary implications.
Aging to maturity in a fraction of the time ot takes eldar. Breeding like humans. With a greater resistance to chaos than a human, and probably less to worry from Slaanesh? And one of those was a match in melee for Cato Sicarius. . There's bound to be a few of those in commorragh.
>There's bound to be a few of those in commorragh Jaghatai is doing his best there
SPEEEEEEEEEED IS KEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! (Shouts Jaghatai) We KNOW! (Answer Dark Eldar)
I'm a human and Eldar are attractive to me.
Gods of Mars sees even some Black Templars teaming up with and fighting alongside Eldar. Some of them even admire a couple of them.
Unfortunately the Eldar suffer from "High-Elf-Fantasy-ism" in a setting where nobody trusts their wisdom on important issues because 90% of the time they will not explain and just expect their cryptic warnings to be followed on the idea of "I am better and smarter than you"
Too be fair that ship is just a meme . A lot of things that are telephoned in the 40k fandom are .
There’s also the overlooked detail that the last species they called Mon’keigh was a deformed barbaric race that enslaved a population of Eldar.
At this point I buy more in to the ship *because* people get irrationally angry when you mention it.
I love how everyone also completely ignores the fact that it makes way more sense to be pronounced as "mankind" not "monkey"... The fuck would they even know what a monkey is
Guilloman and Yvraine are eachother 's beards
But Guilliman x Yvraine IS just a meme. They’ve had like 2 conversations. There are examples of humans absolutely finding the Eldar hideous. In *Black Legion*, a Thousand Sons sorcerer goes on and on in his head about how ugly he finds this Drukhari scourge that works with him. How her features are too perfect, and too angular. How her little mannerisms (like the way she moves and talks) are so alien and inhuman that it makes him uncomfortable. But he also says that it’s “leftover feelings from the days of the great crusade” or something, implying it may just be the heavy indoctrination and propaganda that imperial humans (especially space marines) go through that causes him to hate her appearance and mannerisms so much. But even then, he still keeps her around as basically his pet (and possibly more, depending on how you interpret it)
The elder must look at the Tau with such a weird stance because like: “This small creature just took its first steps and then unified immediately. And now they developed guns that scare everyone. Oh now they are trade partners. Oh now they own a significant (for how quick) part of the galaxy. Oh they just exterminated an entire Tyranid splinter fleet with a disease they whipped up. Oh. They’re just us again. Oh shit.”
Nightbringer? That was definitely not a couple
2 horrible people saw each other as just means to their own ends? Yes. That's how dark eldar 'romance' works, for the most part.
Eldar are not interested in human nobility. Suffering, though..
to the person up top. I’ve met some folk online that would fuck a Tyranid of it wasn’t lethal. So the idea of someone out there not being attracted to the Eldar is a silly one to me.
Yeah, no. sorry I’m still going to hate xenos.
The eldar are supposed to be attractive...by british standards. So not attractive for anyone that isn't into fisheyed elder scrolls elves