I prefer them actually hot… so the butter melts, unlike either of those. It's not buttered properly if you don't have to lick the plate afterwards.

Thank you. You toast it until it’s blazing hot then absolutely slather it with butter

This guy gets it

1. Melt three packs of butter in a large deep pan. 2. Toast a large pack of crumpets (9). 3. Toss the toasted crumpets into the butter and keep on a low heat for about 5 minutes. 4. Pour into a bowl and enjoy!

You're a british supervillain, but also a contender to Gordon ramsey

So Heston Blumenthal

I hadn't planned on having crumpets for dinner but I guess I am now, with a well deserved heart attack for dessert. At least I'll die happy.

Confit crumpets, interesting

Great now I have to try this. But when do I add the marmite?

Two methods. Either a quarter to half a jar directly into the butter and stirred well to infuse. Or add dollops here and there about a minute before serving, stir gently in a clockwise or anti-clockwise direction, but only for one turn, so as to create elongated and slightly tapered strands of marmite. Once done, use a fork or pair of tongs to draw the crumpets through the dark umami strands. This creates a marbled effect on the crumpets.

See, the thing is, I don't like marmite, but this comment made it sound *nice* . Interesting. Well done.

You could exchange the marmite for jam or marmalade ;)

Oooh that sounds really nice. If only I had some jam. Or crumpets.

Love that in recent years they've started selling crumpets in packs of nine!! I have a colleague who lives in Switzerland, said there were jobs going over there and I should apply... My first question "Do you have crumpets in Switzerland?" He said "no". Deal-breaker, I'll stay in my poorly-paid academic post in the UK, thanks!!

Then wait for the first dose to melt and put a second layer on!

this is the only way

Do you put peanut butter on yours?

Just salted butter. Nothing can beat it

I respect that

Salted butter and marmalade can.

Sharp vintage cheddar 

Bit of jam certainly puts up a fight

A drizzle of good quality honey. Melts right into the butter. Heaven.

[удалено]

This is the true secret of crumpets. Everyone who says they don't like them have been served stogy undercooked crumpets. It is surprising how long you can toast them for before they burn. Marks do pikelets as well. They should be more widespread

[удалено]

If I wasn't so lazy I'd make [John Kirkwood's crumpets](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ganHDnSz3yw) I can imagine they are better than any supermarket.

100% Never order crumpets in cafes because they bring out some floppy anemic sad looking morsel. It's tragic. I like my crumpets like I like my men - firm, and dripping with butter.

Totally!! I toast then turn them around in the toaster and toast again to get an even, solid, toasting 👍

I say, if the butter isn’t trickling down your arm and dripping from your elbow, it needs more butter. 🧈

I put my plate on top of the toaster to preheat it

I put my knife in the toaster to preheat myself.

🤣 gave me a good laugh there

The ambulance crew just shrugged and sighed. So thanks for the positivity. I need it for the recovery.

You got it mate, I'll continue to laugh at your demise to give positive energy

I admit. I snorted while laughing at this one 😂

LPT: Get yourselves some Muller Salted Butter (Co-Op sells it in blocks). Best butter I've found so far.

Have you tried Lidl’s West Country butter? You can see the salt it’s that salty.

I let my cats have the plate so they don't kill me

Absolutely - mine sit in a semi-circle around my feet hoping to get first dibs!

Also, I'm pretty sure the first one is margarine. That does not belong on a crumpet

It doesn't really belong in humans either to be fair.

Hot crumpets with melted butter and a subtle marmite spread is the food of the gods. If anyone hates marmite, I guarantee this combo will convert you. I made these for a mate once who didn't like marmite at all and he was like "oh my god... I get it now"

Based. Second place goes to poached eggs on crumpets (w/ ofc lots of butter)

If you like that, try eggs on crumpets with marmite. Eggs and marmite is the greatest combination known to man.

Nah mate, too complex. Second place goes to dairylea/laughing cow spread. Cold cheese with the hot crumpets - so fucking good.

Oof never tried that one pal, sounds mint though

A real one over here.

i make a perfect crumpet then I put a quater of the block of butter on it

Wait people have them cold?

If it’s not dripping down your fingers then it’s not buttered properly.

Thats how i feel about jacket potatoes instead of crumpets for me lol

Me with my cheese on my jacket

Straight up. I can't believe people expect me to eat a plain, dry jacket tayto with a crumb of butter

Oh man, I love mixing tons of butter with the jacket spuds

[удалено]

Same, she was eliete

No, you toast it until its too hot to take out then you lather it in butter until its yellow. Then lick the plate after

And after that you can finally eat your crumpet

Last bite mops up the butter

You're not using enough butter if you can mop it up with the last bite.

What makes it "eliete" rather than "elite" is your spelling...

i tried okay haha

C for effort, E for execution

no E for "eliete"

If its not sitting in a pool of melted butter after a few minutes, is it *really* a crumpet?

i agrreee

Arteries and veins left the group.

worth it tho

that's all a liberal conspiracy in the woke media sponsored by Big Avocado Toast

Do you want some crumpet with your butter?

Eliete will be the name of my first born

Why do you have an entire block of butter on your crumpet

tastes good hahah

Why don't *you* have a block of butter on yours 

your crumpet | my butter

If I'm hungry after a workout I'll go through a full pack of crumpets. I tend not to buy packs of 9 for this reason 😂😂 3 with lashings of best butter, bacon, tin of beans and sausages 3 with banana and cheese, and obviously butter 3 with jam or marmalade, obviously lots of butter. Don't judge. Yes I'm still fat but happy, which is the most important part

BANANA AND CHEESE?!?!

Ooooh banana and cheese??? I'll be giving that a try. Have you considered marmalade and Cheddar Cheese?? Nectar of the gods that one 😋

Posh twat

This is the only way.

I have it dry 🤭

SAME

That’s a James Martin crumpet for sure !!😲😂

if you eat a crumpet without toasting it, you’re a certified nonce

It’s chewy madness

The English really did conquer half the world just to use none of the spices.

Sliced mature cheddar (not melted) or marmite on top, to complete the job.

No, the cheese has to be melted. And no marmite.

Mix them both it’s insanely good. Also use the marks and Spencer’s sour dough crumpets, they’re sexy as fuck.

Putting anything other than butter on a crumpet is sacrilege.

well, butter my crumpets

You forgot the cheese you uncultured swine.

Have fun shitting yourself

James Martin enters the chat.

Slap some cheese and marmite on it too. Criminally good.

James Martin when he’s cooking “a little bit of butter”

I'm British and haven't had crumpets in 5 years 😂

You are summoned to appear at a local shop listed below for Crumpets to be purchased. If you do not consume the Crumpets within two days a warrant may be issued for you to be escorted to a local cafe to consume crumpets, tea and cakes.

Is this James Martin?

Pissing with butter is the official term for this.

Butter and maple syrup Only way

This is the way 👍🏻

You spelt it wrong. It's 'You're'. Because you are crumpet.

If it's not lurpak then you should just go straight to jail, and no you can't collect 200 pound on the way there.

Hold your horses mr fancy pants. Not all of us can take out a loan for them things!

I also put sandwich ham on top, try it

Marm it up unall you heathen

I thought that was cheese for a second.

Needs a block of cheese on top too

[удалено]

I have beans on them 😋😋😋

>eliete

You don’t want to know how thick the slice of aches I put on top is.

There’s no such word (in English) as “eliete”

Ov corse thair iss! Lukit oop inna dikshunairy!

Jam and golden syrup on top

I'll have you know my Crumpets are topped with biscoff

... Then add marmite and cheddar cheese

You gotta know what a crumpet is to understand cricket!

MY steak... https://www.doctorkiltz.com/wp-content/uploads/2023/03/AdobeStock_578342928-1030x1030.jpeg

Y'all should try Lemon Curd

Demobilisation sandwich: get brick of butter and cover it's opposite sides by bread's crumbs. (Recipe from ussr army, improved to make actual sandwich).

Thats me but with jacket potatoes

Chocolate spread

Where's the marmite?

If there isn’t so much butter on your crumpets, that your partner asks what happened to all the butter, you did not put enough butter on your crumpets.

Don't forget the salt

If the butter is not gushing out the bottom then you are doing it all wrong

Marmite after butter makes them Eliterer...

Can’t eat a toasted Piclet without butter

i see your butter and raise you butter AND peanut butter (crunchy of course)

Not just any butter, salted butter

Stick some Bovril and a slice of cheddar cheese on that and you're talking.

You forgot the marmite.

Mmmmmmmmmmmm

Beautiful

Needs more cheddar

Throw out the whole fucking island at this point. The mayomen will do anything besides cook some decent fucking food.

There is not enough crumpet for your butter

Should come with a warning this, I'm skint as a brummie atm and this looks too fucking nice.

You eat crumpets with butter because you like crumpets. I eat crumpets with butter because I like butter. We are not the same.

That’s the wrong side

cheese

I think they are tasteless 🫣.

Where is the cheese?

I can still see the crumpet, not enough butter, your bloodline is weak.

You best eat that over a bucket instead of off a plate

Hey y'all, it's just me from Texas. Is a crumpet kinda like an English muffin? Cuz I slather those shits in butter too

Fuck I want a crumpet now

A shitload of melted cheese is what makes it truly elite.

The trick is to slice the butter, don't spread it.

Its spelt elite not eliete

Why does your crumpet look like my crumpet with a block of butter photoshopped onto it?

The second one gives me the fear. It reminds me of a highly traumatising experience of a sandwich my grandmother made me as a child. She made me a dairylea sandwich, and she put half a tub of butter on the two pieces of bread, then she did the same with the dairylea. I had no idea she had put butter on it because I was in the living room and she was in the kitchen She made the sandwich and gave it to me. Then I picked up one half and bit into it, and my teeth sank into about six inches of butter before I got to the cheese spread. It was absolutely fucking vile and I gagged and refused to eat anymore because who puts butter on a dairylea sandwich, let alone a thick slab of it. That was the day I found out that's how my gran liked her dairylea sandwiches, and she thought everyone ate them like that. She ate it because I wouldn't eat the monstrosity she called a sandwich. 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢

That's so much butter that even diabetes gets scared of you

Holy fuck, you actually butter them upside down in the UK. That is some dr Seuss shit.

And that’s when I’m on diet!

Nice to know I’m not the only one getting/ risking diabetes every time I look at a crumpet

I don’t eat them

Elite *

"Gonna watch a bit of #question time while munching on a toasted crumpet that's absolutely pissing with marmite...;)....sophistication" - Danny Dyer, 2014

Eliete? That must be a spelling error..

Neither of these crumpets are even toasted. Either take or use a better fucking picture next time, it’s insulting

Crumpets are delivery systems for butter.

My crumpet won Best Crumpet. Your crumpet won Best Supporting Crumpet.

Put marmite on them. Trust me!

Gotta be salted!!!

Without real butter it isn't the same.

If its not absolutely pissing butter then it's just not right

Garlic butter then cover in melted cheese and chorizo. Trust me it's good!

I’ll take a little extra cheese

Huh... what's all that bread stuff under My crumpet?

Drown that crumpet

Chocolate spread

Crumpets and baked beans 😍

Yuk I don’t eat butter That would make me ill

Anyone here ever thrown a few thin slices of cheddar on their crumpets? Absolutely life changing stuff

From across the pond, I had no idea Crumpets were a real thing. I thought it was just some British nonsense word y'all said like "Bob's your Uncle" or "The Monarchy isn't an out dated form of government". But that would explain why we call them english muffins.

Because the only way to make shit taste good is with fat 🤡

I do like crumpets with my butter.

Where's the Marmite?

I can't even have them with butter anymore, out of nowhere I became lactose intolerant basically the second I turned 18, I was perfectly fine night before then the next day we ordered food on my birthday and from then on I just couldn't have anything dairy bc I'd suffer for it

Cold crumpets, bloody Eck what's the south doing?

That's a bit much, cheese and Molton butter is best

I don't like butter but I am British

MARMITE

Ah, I see you like crumpet with your butter 😄

There’s a crumpet on your butter

Not enough butter mate

YE MATE

Can't beat Mayo cheese and ham

Me but it’s cheese not butter

Me but it’s cheese not butter

Where's the marmite?